wherefore art thou john paul jones (bachelor in paradise crack)
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- čas přidán 15. 08. 2019
- jordan walked so john paul jones could run
twitter: @bachbullshit
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#TheBachelorette #TheBachelor #BachelorInParadise #BachelorNation #JohnPaulJones #MikeForBachelor - Zábava
John paul Johns also just has such a chaotic calm surfer boy oblivious stoner kid energy and i love him so much
He's such a chaotic good
Claire Holliday i’m blown away by how incredibly accurate this is
Betty gregoire like highkey tho and thank u
I appreciate how Caucasian he is 🌮
Plot twist JPJ graduated Magna Cum Laude from the Busch School of Business and Economics.
He gives off chaotic golden retriever energy and I love it
You didn't say his name but we all know who you're talking about
Why did you do him like that? 🤣
It’s funny how I know exactly what ur talking about 😂😂
JPJ is actually Mr. Peanutbutter from Bojack confirmed !!!
Al Wa Nah he ain’t.
John Paul Jones is seriously and unironically just a riot and he Needs to find a girl what will appreciate him, his whole heart and soul
Victoria Rose me. That girl is me.
Chanel Young you’re gonna have to fight me for him🤠
Betty gregoire I’m ready 🤠😳😂
hopefully tayshia will
Chanel Young nah sissy jpj is my chicken nugget
John Paul Jones is legit only there for time off of work and chicken nuggets...
Liz Z and he’s still more entertaining than the rest
Liz Z he needs to hop back to work on the line memorizing train cause that “poem” was a struuuuuuggle 😬
does he even work? i think he has a trust fund
what work
@the only straight I am is a straight up bitch Im straight but the fact he is an analyst that graduated from business school (which im trying to become myself and is much harder than it sounds) AND he has the personality of a golden boy, oh boy i may just go gay
the shot of blake just dancing when jordan was explaining the blake love pentagon literally KILLS me
Lunette Si I Screamed when I first watched that
Bro in the intro where everyone is getting introduced Blake chose to do that disgusting dance?? I can’t even watch it, it’s so cringy. Like it makes me want to vomit
Love pentagon lol
dead 💀💀💀
JPJ has the face of Heath Ledger with the voice of Seth Rogen
Alie you literally just described my dream man......
Hannah G: *I feel attacked*
Taysha: 👁👄👁❓
Grace B that is because her whole life Hannah G has gotten by with her looks. No substance at all. Tayshia is just the more mature person. Was not at all. Hannah G is Barbie on the beach
Grace B you could tell she wanted to say so much in that moment but Lol her face said it all😂
@@Sumi2379 , agreed, I know Tayshaia has always came across as the mature person, and the look on her face was (or you f......ing kidding me), attacked would be yelling and screaming....even cursing at you...she needs to look up attacked..I agree with Tayshaia also, regarding knowing that she had a date with Blake. I also, agree with the Barbie on the Beach...because even with her and Dylan, they are really lovey dovey, hope they can handle real world issues/drama...
Dude I actually feel bad for Cam. I feel like something has happened in his life that caused him to really want and crave affection from someone. His line about the two phone calls bummed me out LMAO
megaatomicmuffin right. Like I feel really bad for him. And caellyn played him for a rose.
You aren't using that word correctly.
I feel bad for him too bc caelynn clearly wasn’t into him and got his hopes up soo much.
what line
cute boy he said something like “in my mind there are two phone calls: one to ask for my partner’s parents’ permission, and the other to my parents”
*tickled my jimmy a little bit*
I read this right as he said it😂😂
But what does that even mean??? I've been wondering all week
chalseoko freaked him out
chalseoko he felt it is his dick 😂😂
That’s the part where I lost it
Hot take: John Paul Jones for Bachelor
Allie Guerrini honestly who would they find to match his energy??
it would be sooo chaotic lmao
he needs to learn how to kiss tho frfr
you me
exactly, that would be iconic
YES I need more JPJ!!
Okay but John Paul Jones needs kissing lessons ASAP, those girls are in danger
It is a travesty so hard to watch
Can someone explain specifically what’s bad about it? Genuinely curious
@@bryce5134 im not really a kissing expert but I can tell is definently not a smooth kiss, they dont look like theyre in a comfortable position, they keep stopping as if she doesnt know if its over or not then he goes back in its just weird
he's perfect
@@bryce5134 nothing's wrong with the way he kisses.
Incase Jordan didn’t make it clear, it’s his beach and he’s the Mayor.
‘oh it’s a forever 21 commercial’ BAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOD I WHEEZED MY PARENTS ARE ASLEEP STOP
omg I was drinking my juice and almost choked sksksksjsk
I have a conspiracy theory that JPJ didn’t go all the way last season because of his kissing skills.
Ya Ya i was watching him kiss and i was like ehhhh-_-
Ya Ya not a conspiracy, Hannah also said she sent someone home bc they were a bad kisser
that "stay in your lane" from Luke P SENT. ME.
ME TOO LOLLLLL
The worst part about Cam was when he was hanging with a couple others and one of the girls was like, 'Oh I forgot about you Cam" and he replied, "Yeah, people usually do." Haha
So sad
John Paul Jones was a theatre kid *change my mind!!!*
the only straight I am is a straight up bitch actually he did theatre in college!
He legitimately went to college for theater for a hot minute. I know people who were in his program at The Catholic University in Maryland. So he definitely is a theater kid of some sort
He has band kid and theater kid energy. He probably played percussion or saxophone and did theater
Can confirm
"Is JPJ okay?"
Why is jpj napping like that in the pool? Homeboi looks like he was drowning 😂😂
I read somewhere that it was because he didn’t get any sleep after throwing up all night from the hot tacos.
@@angelaraber Damn! What did that witch Jane put in those tacos
In an interview with Chris Harrison, he said it’s a special kind of chili sauce called ‘Gringo Killer’.
@@angelaraber welp, that'll do it then. poor jpj XD
“Where should I put my shoes...” “Stay in your lane” “have you ever had a dream when you-you-That-you-you” STAOPP LMAO
Poor Cam. Never gonna get a girl pregnant on this beach.
Cam is my literal biggest fear in a man
Who's going to be the mother of his mother's grandchildren?
Nahuel
Lolololol 😂😂😂😂
ABC, Anyone but Cam
Lol so sad but true
@@maddiemainer Why, because he's insecure and sad? So you want what, a happy puppy? Grow up.
Alex Byars no because i could potentially die if I get pregnant (yay medical issues) and a man who imagines me as the mother of his children after just one date is terrifying
Jpj is reminding me of prince charming from Shrek
seriously how fucking DARE you. JPJ is our himbo king who writes poetry?? and you compare him to mommas boy?
He reminds me of Shrek for some reason
jpj is loved to matter what, like chaoic energy with dumb surfer boi energy and its just so beautiful and lovely, why does no one on the show, just show him love and affection. hes just so wholesome and will give anyone love and its jsuyjdbfsidfsjp JUST GIVE THE BOI LOVE AND AFFECTION ALREADYYY
one hell of a mess BUT HE KISSES LIKE A FISH
no joke, i’m actually in love with john paul jones. he’s actually super cute and sweet and fun
I think Tayshia and JPJ would be great together ngl
Yes
YESSS
YAAS QUEEN
Mary P. She said in a recent podcast she’s currently single so sadly idk 😩
@@Sumi2379 i heard that :'(. I hope she was just covering it up. but he also is going on two dates w two different chicks next episode, and the "sun tan lotion scene" (he like feels this girl upppp) that he has with one of the girls is super intense...
JPJ IS A LITERAL ANGEL
also tayshia was completely right and hannah had no right to respond like that with the whole “ur attacking me” when she knows the drama happening and let blake speak for her when dylan wanted to talk to her
JOHN PAUL JONES IS MY RELIGION
"is john paul jones ok?"
* literally not even 5 seconds later *
jpj: "oh, woah... tickled my.. jimmy a little bit"
You’ve got a big storm coming lmaooooo
JPJ reminds me of Heath Ledger... Beyond the blond hair and strong jaw, it's the awkward and shy but charismatic tone of voice, and the way his lips naturally curls up at the ends. The edit of "can't take my eyes off of you " just brought it all together because it reminded my of a scene from '10 things I hate about you' in which HL sang that song... Just a feeling :)
Oh both are performers too, but depth of performance is a whole other thing LOL
OMG jpj is a BAD KISSER I would scream
So much of his behavior is cringey. He’s just so gorgeous it plays as cute. He’s quirky not smooth.
@@bgoumas honestly yeah he is a real oddball but I feel like that is what makes him cuter. He's really awkward
It’s not his fault he’s literally full golden retriever
Lol Jordan knew he wasn’t gonna get a rose so he figured he’d make an exit and save his boy clay 🤣 that boy makes EXCELLENT television, bravo to the producer who came across him
these people need to stop coming for my boy cam like so what if he’s a little sad he has a right to be their legit making fun of him for being himself!
Claire Holliday honestly. And his rapping isn’t “that” bad.
just realized i said their instead of there im sorry guys 😔
@the only straight I am is a straight up bitch I find him eccentric, but I don't think he's that weird. He just seems like he's in a perpetual child state, idk.
I’m not on board the “hate cam ” wagon.
the only straight I am is a straight up bitch Yall reaching lol he’s clearly just a bit desperate to find a partner but so are half the ppl there! If it was anyone else they wouldn’t be clowning so much
1. I’m so glad I’m not the only one who was incredibly uncomfortable watching Blake try to dance
2. Low key also feel SO bad for Cam, I think he’s just misunderstood on BIP
3. LIVING FOR JORDAN AND DEMI I LOVE IT OMG
4. Tayshia is a woke kweeeeen
5. Hannah needs to stop pretending she isn’t the one indirectly encouraging all the drama
6. Christian seems really violent and aggressive, 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
7. JPJ and the poem for Tayshia was the cutest thing to happen in the history of the bachelor franchise, period
Edit: ALSO I like the heath ledger reference when you played I love you baby over JPJ
Yeah I was like did JPJ already have it memorized? Bc I don't think they have books/internet while there
chalseoko idk it looked like he had a paper w him so maybe it was on there???? Either way it was a pleasant surprise
Kat F unpopular popular opinion: Blake isn’t good at dancing, he’s just moves more than most white males do
tapply a What’s sad is that it appears that he thinks he’s really good. 😂
What heath ledger reference?
How is this content free
is it bad that I feel more strongly about the bachelor/bachelorette/bip than I do politics
It’s ironic the mayor of paradise is the one that starts stuff lol
Jordan is an absolute legend and JPJ is an angel
JOHN! PAUL! JONES! honey, you have outdone yourself with that poem
I literally want a john paul jones.
I don’t even watch this show and I’m SCREAMINGG
“uhhh and hopefully uhhhh that RiNgS a B- hopefully that uhhhhh sheuhhhh isuhBOUT IT YuUuUuH”
I wonder if JPJ is the guy Hannah sent home for being a bad kisser... 😬
probably 💀💀💀💀💀
Curly Kay honestly.......................you may be on to something there 😬😳🙈
No Hannah said it was Jonathan
Curly Kay I was thinking this too!
John Paul Jones is basically Troy Bolton with better abs
YES MIKE NEEDS TO BE BACHELOR 🙌🏼 I loved that part
We need a Black bachelor,and bc he's fine,sweet,caring,and derveres to find love.
Yesssss he does! #MikeforBachelor
He was one of the best! Hannah missed out
@@thirstaefortae5057 I loves your profile pic. I Love Yoo is a great webtoon
Malaika Tapela It is! Glad it’s back
Was skipping to the parts with John Paul Jones and saw a man sleeping in a pool, immediately knew it was him. The man. The myth. The legend.
I love John Paul Jones so much it hurts
John Paul Jones is literally the spirit of a golden retriever in a human body
7:35 “please don’t wreck that piñata”
7:36 **“That piñata’s getting wrecked”**
Jordan is a skinny legend and I’m so glad he’s here
Everyone is really mean to Cam. It reminds of how people acted in highschool, it's cruel.
I need to marry jpj now
Im rooting for JPJ and Katie, aka my crack head King and Queen, and I'm very happy that they havr budding relationships. ALSO;Hannah IRRRKKKS, Nicole IRRRKKKSSSS, Christian IRKKKKSSS, Caelynn IRKKKKSS, and Blake IRRRKKKKSSSSSSSSS
@the only straight I am is a straight up bitch 😂😂😂
I have never once watched a single episode of the Batchelor or any other variation of the show and yet I have watched over 15 of these Batchelor crack videos and I am FULLY LIVING. I have no clue who John Paul Jones is but he is my favorite.
i have not once seen this show but john paul jones just keeps me watching these dang
John Paul Jones is THE man and no one can tell me otherwise
Jpj is the only reason I’m watching bachelor in paradise. He’s like that hilarious best friend in an action move that just takes you away from all the serious. He must be protected at all costs.
Cam redemption arc
LMAOOOOOO EDITING ON POINT I WAS DYING THE WHOLE TIME
Poor Cam.
That’s the recap of BIP so far.
this is the best bachelor in paradise crack i’ve seen
I LIVE FOR THESE please don't ever stop
Y'all I'm French and I don't know what is this show or what it's about but I need to watch more. I've never heard the name John Paul John nor know who he is but man i'm rooting for him
JPJ is such a dream boat
JPJ Jokes Are 👍👍👍👍❤❤❤❤
when cam said 😌 i felt that
Don’t watch the bachelor, don’t get most of your references, but by god you know how to edit an entertaining video. It also helps how everyone is so gorgeous
"go buy a pair of espodrilles" 😂😂
I LOVE Jordan on this season! I love how he acts like he is the god of the beach. He is a GOD!
PROTECC DYLAN AT ALL COSTS
^^^
He's such a precious bean
He’s too clingy.
Fr. He became clingy so quick. It’s not even cute.
He’s super clingy, but also I think Hannah needs to tell him to back off a little
Anyways... mike for bachelor
Also: that Coco edit had me near urinating myself. And speaking of pee, when Cam was staring forlornly at the ocean that wave that crashed on him gave him pee pants. Poor guy. Insult to injury.
2:56 SENT ME DJSJSJ
But for real if mike doesnt become the bachelor I will riot
Thank you for the Mike, Colton, and Nick disclaimer. I’m tired of telling people 100 times that he can still be the Bachelor. I’m not even exaggerating this number. Constantly on FB, twitter, Instagram, and reddit I’ve been saying this to people because people keep saying “oh no, he can’t be Bachelor.” That argument has been broken twice in the last few years. If anything it seems like you should be on paradise if you want to be the male lead. Lol. Also, how is Tayshia attacking Hannah? She was talking to her pretty calmly, just saying. Tayshia was left in the dark by everyone except Kristina. But it took Kristina a while to even tell Tayshia what was happening. Also, JPJ attempting to memorize a poem is the cutest thing.
Poor Cam. :( I thought he was weird at first but he's actually one of my favorites now ❤️
update: chris harrison said that the front runners for the bachelor are tyler, peter, and mike
laura auden honestly... we been knew
if it isn't mike or john paul jones, im protesting
i won’t lie there’s probably no one I love more than john paul jones what an icon
i’ve never watched an episode of the bachelor/bachelorette/bachelor in paradise but i’m addicted to watching these videos and now i feel really invested in what happens
Thank you for editing this the way it should have.
these videos are what keep me going 🥰
Jordan is the best
I don't even watch the bachelor but these edits are SENDING ME
Lukewarm take: this show is making me really dislike Hannah g. If she does end up with Dylan, I hope he watches this and rethinks some things. No one deserves to be second choice.
Also never really cared for Tasha, (spelling?) but now I want to be her friend.
What are other people's thoughts on Hannah? I'm interested
Hannah’s kinda coming across as the pretty girl that’s always gotten her way and doesn’t know how to handle conflict in a mature and clear way. She’s saying one thing to people’s faces to satisfy them while continuing to hurt them behind their back.
Even just the way she responded to Taysha shows a lot about her maturity level and lack of personal responsibility. All taysha was saying was she wished she was honest about her past with Blake then Taysha wouldn’t have gone on that date with him which only complicated things for everyone on the show. Hannah took that as an attack instead of constructive criticism from a friend. A mature response would be to apologize and admit your faults thus far and let them know that you’re still human and you’re trying to best to figure it out. I hate this generation and the “hater” mentality, there’s nothing wrong with accepting criticism and growing from it
Courtney Coleman literally spot on!
Also, Hannah G is being vague to Dylan about everything. If she wants to date multiple people she has to be very honest/transparent about her feelings (she acts like she doesn’t have feelings for Blake but her actions show it). And telling Dylan she went out with Blake two weeks after they met was a shady move smh
I literally have notifications on for this i fucking LIVE for your videos thank u queen for blessing us omFG
I swear to GOD if Mike isn’t the next bachelor I will RIOT
SAME
I live for these edits no joke, the circus music gets me every time
I love and appreciate JPJ so much that it hurts. He's so fun and carefree. I hope he finds someone who can appreciate his entire being & personality
okay, AWESOME. I love words. -Jordan
*me on the essay section of literally any test*
This is your best work yet
jordan went from being an angsty mess to my chaotic favorite and i refuse to say otherwise
adding in the gma clip before mike gets me everytime!! we stan!!
Could the show be like this because I would definitely watch it if it were
I love you for making these lmao
You make the best edits I dont even watch the bachelor but I watch all your videos I love it
I love your edits omg
Been coming back to this video for years, I love it so much. I can’t stop replaying 0:44-0:48
This video is drop and roll, try to breath HILARIOUS!! LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!
i love John Paul johns SO MUCH and I hope he finds the perfect person for him
i dont watch bachelor or anything so i kinda have no idea whats going on.. but i live for these videos and jpj lmao
🙏🏻🙏🏻💜💜 thanks for the content
Can jpj just be the bachelor??! Give him more time off work and chicken nuggets please