Why I Left My Colombian Wife After 1 Year of Marriage
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- čas přidán 16. 06. 2024
- I talk about the reasons why I chose to leave my wife and get a divorce after 1 year of marriage.
Why I Walked Away From My Marriage After 1 year
Why I Filed For Divorce After 1 Year of Marriage
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0:00 An Autumn Of Love
3:03 The Warning
6:01 The Neglect
10:34 The Betrayal
12:17 The Death Threat
13:32 Self-Reflection
I have filed for divorce and a restraining order on the man who sent me the death threat.
Also to clarify, when i say clubs and bars I mean salsa dancing and regular bars, not the crazy party ones.
Please don't send any hate towards my ex-wife or anybody from that church please.
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Sorry homeslice but as a fellow colombian, that doesn fly and we can critisize the bad actions of people and other churches.
Sounds like a micro agressive church culture that controls their people loke a cult.
My sister is a protestant, not me and i see her going through the same thing with her supposed future mother in law that tries to impose her "virtuous " church life on my sis in order for my sister to be with her son.
It is probably not a good idea. We need to respect the wishes of those individuals who don’t want to be associated with your new life after breaking away from their church.
Good riddance. Sounds like a cult to me. Definitely fishy when wife comes home at 1 in the morning😮.
Bro… remember passion is a two-way road... Don't sweat them too profoundly... That culture is very communal which means they live in a big tent… you can't live in a big tent unless You forgive transgressions… besides I know you've seen how local men do their thing 😅
@@aniwee17 Breaking away from their church? Dude, he was never enslaved to their church, so why do you want to present it so?
I feel it is wrong of any institution to think it can can the level of a hold presented here, this is at a level of a cult in my view.
There should never be a situation where she has to neglect her duty to her husband for her church, these should not compete.
With my best intentions I state to you: never make decisions when you’re hungry, angry, lonely, or tired.
or horny lol
That's impossible though.
@@WheresWes
😂I was legit about to comment that lol.
@@WheresWes lol. But Hornyness makes you make decisions, just like hunger gives you no options.
Yep! It's known as the H.A.L.T. state, if you are in a halt state, don't make a decision, postpone it!
So glad no children were involved in this. Very sorry for this experience.
a freaking men
You didn't see the red flags. You entered her frame, belief system and values.. to ultimately see you were not compatible because you had your eyes closed. You just learned a valuable lesson. The next page or chapter of your life will be much better. Pain is the best teacher.
you never see them while you're in it, it's always in hindsight after
A feminine woman enters the man's masculine frame... and flourishes.
Never enter a woman’s frame.. she will lose any and all respect for you- it’s not natural
@@WheresWes no bro you always see it you just choose to ignore it because you’re distracted by the PUSSY.
@@WheresWesyou’re taking 0 accountability and will continue to fail again if that’s your reasoning that it’s hindsight lol…
Damn, what a situation to be in, AND in a country like Colombia. I am 40 years old now, never married and never will be, just too much risk and hassle. Stay strong, fellow Gents!
What the country has to do with this , the bad guy ??😂😂 i was in a church in california a lot ex mates where going to trying to change their life .
Respect to you for putting your personal business out there like this and opening up yourself to criticism
cheers bro. Gotta do what I'm called to do.
@@WheresWes She tries to get money for her boyfriend
Looking back on it, as an outsider, it seems like the relationship would never work. Wes likes to go out, travel and do new, fun things. While the wife likes to go to church every week and is content stay in her hometown. Not on the same page
yeah thats a good point. i do both like both lifestyles but as a balance
There is no way she was working that much, (as an accountant!) I theorize she was seeing other men and she didn't want you ever going out because you might catch her. The church was an excuse, -they don't care-. I dated a colombian in the States and she'd lie and cheat like that.@@WheresWes
Hey Wes, as someone of Chinese descent who is married to a Latina I related to a lot of things you said. It's true when you come from a kind of unaffectionate and honestly somewhat cold culture like many East Asian cultures it's easy to fall in love with the warmth, affection, and socially oriented focus of something like Latin cultures. We have a night and day kind of experience between both sides of our family. On my Asian side, everyone does their own thing, is cordial and we normally only see each other on holidays. On my Latin side, everyone is closely involved in each other's lives and we always see each other and I've lost count of how many Christenings, baptisms, communions, weddings, baby showers, birthday parties, backyard/park BBQs, quinceañeras/sweet sixteens, etc.... that we've attended.
The grass isn't greener on the other side of course (as you seemed to have learned as well) and being involved with a lot of people often means people drama and sometimes their headaches becoming your headaches.
As a black woman I grew up like East Asians. I too was drawn into my ex's family (he was black also) because of their love they had for each other. Key words "each other". Their love and support really stopped with their family. They didn't really like outsiders I found after about 5 months as the women felt I was taking their male relative away from them.
The majority of them were unmarried/single women and looked st my ex as the patriarch of the family and had been single for 10 yrs before he met me.
I must say if I ever date again I will go for the family who only gets together on holidays and such. And since I don't celebrate holidays I'll just not attend. I'm sure the family wouldn't mind if they aren't tight knit
@@swiftkarma4436 I'm sorry to hear about your experience and I get why you'd avoid someone with a complicated family dynamic. As I said to Wes, sometimes the grass isn't always greener on the other side. I have the warm, embracing and deeply involved experience with my wife's family but damnit if I don't want to just do shit simple every once in a while.
Like recently I wanted to go see Godzilla so I asked one of our cousins if he was interested. The next thing you know there was 11 people going so it meant we had to find reserved seating together for all 11 of us that was also a reasonable distance to everyone, then we had to figure out the car arrangements, then making sure everyone got the time and place right, and got there relatively on time.
@DensterNY thank you for your kind words. Your simple outing turned into quite the ordeal I see. I am happy that you have a lovely family.
That death threat made me upset but the defense for it was worse. Your ex should have flat out condemned that behavior. Her dismissive behavior is a tell tale sign that she'll put up with horrible people just because their friends.
she probably didnt mind if wes was chopped up cartel style
As a Colombian, let me tell you: That's the complicity people have for those types of situation here. It is a weird mixture between Asian collectivisim and aversion of shame, and nepotism.
pretty sure in the US a threat like that can get him arrested
Family.
Or put them up to it. Wes seems naive.
I live in Mexico and some of these people are dangerous despite the smiles they show you. When you have conflict with them- due to their narcissism/fraud/lying- or simply disagree with them you will see their true colors.
Damn. Hopefully you recover from this. I have several friends now on their 30s having issues with their marriage, some with kids.
You literally dodge a bullet right there. Red flags are so important nowadays. Love your channel brother.
As long as you walk away learning from your mistakes and own up to them you’ll emerge in a better place than where you were.
amen
walk...gi gomez threaten to chop him up cartel style....he ran......
Not necessarily, he lost a ton of time, effort and money only to get disrespected and threatened in return.
She didn't love you, bro. It's that simple. I'm sure you know that by now. It's ok. Forgive yourself and use your experience as knowledge to live an even better and more fulfilling life. One love, brother.
As a colombian livinging in US for most of my life ; i tell you, this is equal as you date a very religious person in USA you will live the church life . You prospected to them as person that you arent " disonest" you need to look into yourself what is wrong first this why you got a bad relation with your family also. If you arent a religious dont jump into you may not be prepared for a radical change in life . I was in a christian church n i felt being sucked 24/7 in da church , so i left.
Damn! respect for staying strong and keep continuing in life.Not many people speaks open about past marriage.
thanks Rami!
Same bro, also divorced when I was around 23 or so, now I'm 31. I lost my older brother a year ago to an overdose and I can tell you that there in more to life than society's, church's and people's opinion don't matter that much. Personally, I think that the only thing that matters is the list of things that makes ME happy. Whether it's yoga, friends, plant medicine ceremonies to work on myself or even alone time to go deeper into your own soul and unravel things so you can be a better version of yourself. This video is beautiful that you can articulate this all. I really commend you man, I've also followed you for a couple of years I think regarding me moving to Colombia. This video is amazing to see you as a person and how you've grown. If you ever need to talk please reach out brother.
Wes, I am sorry to see you struggle in your head. I am at least 2X your age. You need to understand yourself and stop looking to a woman, a country, and/or a church to give you your sense of self. Please let the past go and focus on what is important to you personally. Focus on the required things in your life and the no-deal things in your life too. Don't worry about what others think of you, instead focus on living your life in a space of internal integrity. If you do that others will see you for what you are, gravitate towards it and respect it. Be humble, be authentic and live your life. I live in Brasil. I am American by birth and Brasileiro by choice. I speak Portuguese and live completely Brasilian but I will tell you this. My wife is Brasilian. She knows that I am committed to her completely but from the beginning I made certain that she knew my lists of requirements and no-deal for myself and our relationship. I also made certain that she not only had her own list but that she knew that I accepted it. We both know that this agreement while not static is not easily modified and is a deal breaker if broken. This is my second marriage as the first imploded because we did not base our relationship on each others lists and our joint agreement of mutual understanding. I believe that a man's destiny is dependent on the strength of his bonds and that bond with his partner is the most important that he will ever form. It should be cared for diligently. So . . . your marriage was broken from the beginning my friend. It is hard to say it but if you accept it, learn from it and move on . . . then you will live your best life . . . which I want for you. Fica Bem, Faz Bem (Be Good, Do Good)
Solid
Conselho muito bom. Irmão Lennertz, este é um mundo pequeno. Falei com Wes na frente de um restaurante vietnamita em Envigado antes de sair. Espero poder te conhecer um dia quando passar um tempo em Santa Catarina.
@@StoneyVintson Claro, o mundo é pequeno, meu amigo Stoney. Sempre temos o oportunidade conversar no sul do Brasil . . . or maybe in Colombia sometime in the future. I have interacted with Wes a few times online and he is a good soul. I want him to have the life that he wants and deserves as a birthright of being human. It is always good when we cross paths, my friend. I am spending more time currently in Porto Alegre and Rio Grande do Sul so if you find yourself headed to SC let me know so we can plan how to share a meal together. Fica bem. Faz bem. Stoney
yes, im from Colombia, Barranquilla, I follow Wes before his marriage or his life in Manizales, i inmediately realized he took a bad desicion, worst when you mix all with religion, he was weak with his problems in Medellin not strong enough to take that kind of desicion, thanks god you are out of it.
@@TiagoLennertz Yes, I have a friend in Porto Alegre. Just a short ways away. Working on my Portuguese every day as well as Spanish.
Wes I'm so sorry to hear about your marriage, I haven't been in the channel in a little while and it breaks my heart to see you relationship end. As a Colombian it shames me how they are speaking to you, but don't give up the faith and your self awareness of what's right and what's wrong
Praying the best for you and your recovery. Props to sharing your story to empower others. Wish you the best!
Sorry to hear you had these bad experiences brother I hope you get fully past all the bad things soon! Thanks for sharing this!
Thank you for sharing your personal experiences Wes.
Sorry to hear and glad you’re safe. God bless❤
The guy who threatened you claims to be a Christian. LOL Typical Colombian Christian; they are Christian in church and then revert right back to the old ways. Pablo Escobar people used to go to church and repent the walk out and do what they did. You saved yourself a lot of heartache later in life. Sometimes a divorce is the only solution.
Same with women! The ones who goes to Church and pretends to be a big Christians they are the worst. Saturday night they sleep with 2 different guys and Sunday morning they go to church pretending they are nice innocent girls. BS!!
true that bro
this is christians everywhere. pretty much rolled my eyes when i saw church+death threats together.
Aka a hypocrite
This type of ignorant comments really evoque the Pablo out of any Latino.
I recognise that voice in the message you played!
I would never have expected that. It just goes to show that you can't take people at face value.
It sucks that you had to go through that. Anita is lovely but it's clear that it wasn't right for you guys and I'm glad that you are able to get out of the situation and get on with your life.
Cheers bro. Yeah that's why the threat shocked me too
When I saw the title of this video...I was like damn you're milking this topic. But finally in this video you shared more depth to the situation and I think it could actually be a learning experience for others who may find themselves in a similar situation or pressure in a different country with a different culture. Thank you for sharing. This video shows how very mature & responsible you are. I think you learned a lot about yourself from your experience of living in Colombia & that will carry you forward wherever life takes you! Thanks bro!
Thanks for sharing your story brodie. Sorry you had to experience that but good on you for taking the high road 🙌🏽.
Its good you got out early!! My situation was I was in a 9 year relationship and my ex never put herself in my shoes either or on my side of the family. She cheated on me on the 9th year. You got out early so its a blessing for you. I am still resentful I wasted 9 years of my life but am recovering and hopefully healed from the trauma. Your ex was a covert narcissist!
He's lucky he didn't end up dead! He seems to think the church people did this on their own, whereas from what I'm hearing I wouldn't be surprised if the wife coordinated with the church people to terrorize him!
Foreigners don't realize how much of an outsider you can be when you travel. Just because your heart is good, etc. means nothing! They simply see you as an object to be manipulated.
Many locals have motives FROM THE START when they deal with you and you are an actor in a movie you know nothing about. 🤣
...i can relate ...helped me understand a similar relationship ...helped me to heal some past hurts...thanks for sharing 😊❤
Takes a lot to walk away! Good for you, that guy has something coming for him along the way. I hope this all works out for you bro! Thank you for sharing you are saving a lot of men
Good for you for getting away from that toxic relationship and all the craziness that came with it.
You are so right on in your comprehension an articulation of these inappropriate behaviours. Much appreciation for your candor. This message is pure wisdom for a young man to carefully consider how another person treats them, with honour and respect, or disregard and perverted reasonings to justify their lack of character. Fruit?
It’s really brave to share this… not many people go through this… thanks for sharing.. I had something similar regarding the church aspect
I think you break things down very well, you make things very easy to understand!!! Thank you for creating this video!!! I think this is a very valuable lesson for you and for individuals like me that is looking for answers in regards to relationships!!!
great story brother, more people need to hear this... her putting something before you at all times is a red flag for sure
It seems like she really wasn’t into him. Just wanted to be married to someone who she could control.
Much respect. I love following your channel
Thx for keepin it real wes and finishin the story. I
I’m Colombian (born & raised in the states though) and i appreciate your content, I love how open minded you are. You’ve learned from this experience and luckily you’re still young and you know you can move on. Thank you for your videos, I enjoy them. I haven’t been to Medellin in 7 years and I’m looking forward to going this December with my family 🎉
columbian woman sound pretty brutal....
@@tednguyen7258there are all kinds of women in Colombia.
I was born and raised in the states but I am Colombian hahahaha🤡
@@GOAT07_ Colombiana chiviada 🤣
@@GOAT07_ my brother is born and raised in the states and is Colombian too. Colombia grants dual citizenship, and more than likely this guy grew up in a Colombian community in the states.
1:55 as a South Asian I felt this it’s one of the reasons why I started watching you in the beginning you would talk about Asians in the diaspora and the issues we face and I thought it was cool. Sorry the marriage didn’t work out bruh but hopefully others can learn from your mistakes and now your in a happier situation!
Sending you love. Glad you had the opportunity to reconnect with your beautiful family. Thank you for sharing your story.
100% with you man, total respect.
Thank you for sharing your experience and the best to you in your new journey.
Marriage is tough man. As someone who married and divorced young, there is life after this. It is important you go through the process of reconciling this for yourself. I've been remarried and am about to hit my 30-year anniversary. So, keep pressing on. Who is at fault is less important than understanding your own internal struggles. better yourself, understand yourself, and move on. And I agree with you 100% On manners of marriage it is you and your wife against the world. You can fuss, fight, argue, all of that. But if something external tries to break in... oh no, it is ON. You are not the first person and won't be the last person to come across this vendetta like behavior. The Latin sense of family is admired by many, but it is also something that can go very sideways.
Thanks for sharing your experience Wes, we can all learn from your experience and know what to look out for (red flags). I hope you do well in Poland and have much success. Never sacrafice your peace, quiet, and freedom.
You're going to be alright! Stay strong and positive! And keep marching forward! Your friend, Per
cy!
Thanks for sharing bro. Despite your bitter and terrible experience, I was able to extract precious gems and can help young men to spot red flags in a potential marriage mate. I come to understand that you don't really know a person until you live with them. I wish you well in your new life; it must be refreshing. Cheers!
I’m sorry that you had to go through that man. The best thing for your mental and emotional health is to choose positivity over negativity. You’re in a new place now to open a new chapter in your life. I’m going to visit Bangkok for a month this December for a mental healthy trip too. Would be nice to have a beer with ya if you’re there🍺
Thanks for sharing this video. I find it extremely informative for people interested in marriage with a person from another country. CULTURE, is a word that is often softly mentioned but is probably the X-factor that normally determines or dictates the outcomes of these already embedded difficulties. I which you the best and I respect you for sharing which IMO took an abundance of courage on your part to enlighten us on the possible complications of human romance universally. I wish you good luck in the future.🦁
People think the U.S. is bad with regards to scams.....Not even close when you look at the rest of the world.
As Americans, we live in a nice little bubble if you think about it...
We have a lot to be grateful for.
I'm a naturalized citizen myself, originally of Indian and African descent.
Hey Wes, enjoy your time in Thailand/Asia. Please make more travel content, I'd like to hear more of your perspective.
will do bro
Nice video Wes keep it going bro
Many blessings to you my brother. Your energy is positive, always stay positive. Very well expressed with out the "detail details". I will always support your journey in life. life is a stepping stone. You are always moving forward in life. Many blessings and positive energy to you always.
Wes, thanks for your vídeos and keeping it real.
This video should be mandatory viewing for all gringos who hyper romanticize Colombia and it’s culture. If you are at all looking for long term partners especially in Medellin, learn that you will likely face immense headwinds navigating the chaotic, hedonistic and barbaric nature of the paisas. Once, a Colombian-American expat in Medellin told me, “You will love us, until you will get to know us!”
Paisas are the whole of Colombia. And way over rated because of their city.
Ha,he was right.I spent 20 months in Colombia over 3 trips.Yes,Columbians were wonderfull,non stop amigo,caballero,all sort of polite formulas,but when the mask fall it is another story.Columbians are disorganized,irresponsible,braindead ,unnacountable violent savages.Just look at how they push their way into a subway car.
In Cali entetering a bus from a trainlike platform,I got catapulted into the seats by people pushing behind.I got scammed and cheated by "good friends" nearly killed in Cali when I got robbed,pushed to the ground by three youth with one of them.kicking me in the head.I am lucky to be alive,with no fracture and having kept my eyesight.
One Columbian on an expat facebook page wrote:
In Colombia,60% of the people are
wonderfull,and the other 40% horrible.20 to 30 years ago they were killing each others left and right.These people haven't disappeared.Many would be in their 40's,50's60's and 70's now.
Yes Colombia is full of murderers,do not forget that.
Just look
🎯
Mexico can be like this too. I live in Yucatan, Mexico. I've never met more chaotic TOXIC people.
Luckily my current village/town of Hocaba doesn't give too much of this vibe. Plus I intentionally limit my interactions with people to only what is necessary- buying things, etc.- for the most part.
Except for talking with much older people in the park, etc. I like to do that and they seem to be drawn to me. Everyone is drawn to me actually (my whole life, not always a good thing! 🤣) but I prefer chatting with the older people in my town. I am fascinated by them sometimes.
Wes, this was a powerful video. I watched your channel a few years ago when I was studying Colombia to see if I wanted to go. I remember you talking up Manizales and the church and the women being different. The 2 most interesting things you touched on were that you weren't going to go through the church to have a wife and how they weaponized "face/face saving" against you. I can relate in that I have family who are much the same... if we are to be a family I have to go through their church. I called their bluff and haven't been to see them in 25 years as I'm not religious.
On the saving face, I would think that you're familiar being Asian, but this is the first time I've heard it done this way. Not to say it's new. The whole situation just seems like assimilate or else. I have an uncle who would've been so happy with that situation... having the church as his proxy wife. Ultimately, I went to Thailand (for a visit) and it seems you did too. I'll have to check out your new vids.
Hardcore church goers in Latin America are almost in a cult-like atmosphere. I think you may just have underestimated that. You deserved much more respect my friend.
Been following your story for a few years, fellow Christian here, from what you're saying a church like that seemed poisonous not only for your marriage, your health, but also your faith. Good to see you're well, learning and growing after such a hard season.
all protestant church run like that
@@raycdo2012 every church has its problems, but Wes' experience sounds like he encountered a very fundamentalist/cult like church.
@raycdo2012 They really don’t. This church sounds very cultish, although biblical theology does lend itself to a cultish mindset anyway
@@nocomment4848 if you dont like Christianity say so
Well, theologically he was in the wrong, and so was the Church. Although the intitial action by his wife was correct.
Matthew 18:15-20 ESV
“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”
love your vulnerability and honesty man. it sounded like you guys were more attracted to the idea and projection of marriage and stability rather than really being in love. but that happens to all of us, it is a learning process. Focus on developing your sense of self and connecting with your own purpose and emotion, pick up some hobbies and passions. you are a great person and I've been watching your channel for quite a bit.
Also if you ever come back in Los Angeles, lemme know and I would love to get a coffee with you! you are super interesting
@@TussinTim🏳️🌈?
I only have to say, I’m so sorry Wes! No one deserves to be treated like that! I hope you are able to forgive and keep growing!!
Thanks for the vulnerability and for sharing your story. Live and learn.
Thank you for sharing this.
@Where’sWes. I am shocked to hear about your situation in Colombia. I have been there many times and not heard of this before. I went thru a similar situation in finding a woman I loved in Colombia, but our break up/separation was not youself. All I can say is keep your head up high and don’t let anyone else disrespect you as a Man. Much respect from California. I will watch all your videos ✌🏻
I'm kicking you while you're down, but I'm happy to see you recognize you F'ed up. Red Flags were there and you ignored them. Praying you continue on your path toward growth and maturity. Wishing you continued blessings and success!
It takes at least a year and a half to really get to know someone - as no one can hide being phony, serious bad habits or erratic behavior for that long… Plus it’s really interesting to see how people are during the Holidays.
I see you, Wes. You're a good man. Life's not fair. But it must be lived. You're on track.
My respects to you brother, your experience sounds like a horror movie. You strike me like a legit, genuine guy. Like you said, that chapter in your life is behind you. So more power to you brother. You look like you really are enjoying life now.
Respect, tough experience , appreciate the sharing.
Thank you for sharing your story. I'm glad you got out of that situation. I hope men can use your story to be more aware of how they're feeling when they are dating!
Thanks for sharing with us.
God bless you Wes 🙏 You are an amazing person for sharing so honestly. I hope you can still keep some faith in God and like you said it should not about a religion, it is supposed to be about a relationship with God. I hope many more blessings in your life continue to come to pass. My prayers go out to you and your loved ones during this time ✌️
The true measure of who someone is after life knocks them down is their ability to get back up, knock off the dust, learn the lesson, and move along. You got this.
Thanks for being so open about this topic Wes. I think you would have fared better with a lady from Barranquilla. The marjority of the Colombian women I dated were from Cali and Barranquilla and they were very independent minded even if they lived with their parent(s). You had quite the experience. If I were you, I would stay clear of Colombia for at least 3 years.
it is a big miracle i have been married 27 years and she is still crazy about me. but i also know the formula to my success isn't a guarantee for most, no matter how many boxes you get right. I've lived in your world thru your videos. now get out there and make a lot of love again because life is too short!
Bruh I don't know if you will see this. But thanks for sharing your story with the world. I have a religious girlfriend from Latin America and I'm from the west and your experience is helping me see all the red flags and potential issues that could come up. Thanks for having the courage to share all this.
Wes, the bottomline is your wife completely COMPROMISED you by including that guy in your marriage/business. That is a "red line/hard stop" that should not be crossed in a relationship/marriage. Completely Unacceptable.
Don't try to introspect/overthink it, your instincts were dead on and you did the right thing by leaving/defusing the situation. Just make sure you get the divorce legalized as soon as possible(don't get lazy), and do NOT look back.
Get your ass to Pattiya Beach for a little fun. You deserve it.
PS- I remember watching the video when you and your exwife were in Greece. There was one shot of a look on her face that spoke volumes to me. She looked like a fish out of water and not compatible at all with you and your interests. It doesnt mean she is a bad person, just on a completely different wavelength with much different interests. Carry On!
wes almost got chopped up
If she’s that different I wonder how and why they met
kinda sad someone on vacation is a fish out of water.
religion is the opiate of the masses
Wow. I can see your frustration, Sadness the way you express this. Really felt it. Hopefully this experience makes you stronger for next chapter.
I almost got scammed by a lady from Colombia, but she started telling me she loved me and all this dramatic shit right away. So I did what any man should do. I RAN THE HELL AWAY!!
sorry to hear that you divorced. I found your channel on CZcams a year ago and you talked about stuff to avoid, scams and how you can against all odds live and stay in Colombia 😊
GREAT VIDEO. KEEP GOING.
Great video, authentic
Thank you, for sharing your story. I appreciate it. It was better to have loved, than to not have loved, at all! Hopefully, the past, will be the past! Live your life, now, to the fullest! Do not look back...
Thanks for sharing 👍🏼
Damn. Sorry for the situation bro.
Wishing you all the best ❤
Well outlined. Well presented. Well sequenced. And well conveyed in execution. Nicely set up with compelling emotional backstory. Made even more so by an emotional authenticity. Young man, your anecdote is the
other- gender-side of
"The Joy Luck Club."
Your telling of it is classically designed. Delicately rendered.
The Prophet SAW said there are 3 ways you know some one you Travel with them live with them or do business with them... sex doesn't tell you who people are
great point
"SAW" lmao...."let's play a game "...
Sorry you had to go through that. I’m going through something similar with a Colombiana and I’m going to have to make some tough life decisions if i want to continue to be with her or not.
Might go to the Middle East or Eastern Europe like Romania
Have had similar experience about dating Church rather than the girl just like you.
Ive taken away alot from this video. And though my marriage is fairly young. And me and my wife married young. Here's a few things i can reflect on.
My wife when we met she spoke no English and i didn't know Russian. But we knew we loved each other. So she promised to learn English to meet my friends and i learned Russian to understand her family.
This made it easier for us to communicate and understand our friends and families better.
We sought out counseling. But not from our friends. We did talk to her parents who have been married for over thirty years.
But we found a licensed counselor and aired out alot of things. Cultural and personal.
With my wife being from Ukraine partially raised in Russia and i being from the United States. A literal case of east meets west.
we last longer than most of the native couples here because, we realized that we will disagree, culturally and sometimes spiritually.
But..we listen, we understand what makes the person tick, we work together, make the time for each other and occasionally go back to what brought us together in the first place.
I fall more in love with her every day. And it makes Happy every time she tells me how she's proud to have me as a husband. And i tell her she's amazing every day that's why.
Wow!
learn Russian, bro. It helps a lot
I've long since learned. @@Evrastrim
Trust that what you say to your friends/gf/whatever is private is the most important factor in any relationship
Hey, I am not a married man but as an older person I have become more set in my ways. I think sometimes when you are younger you're more willing to adapt and compromise, but as you get older you realize how much your own values define who you are and need to hold up and it may affect who you would choose as a life partner if you were to do so. It is better to have the woman adapt to your family and your life more than the other way around in my opinion. If you're going to be the leader of the house then they have to come into your frame. At least that is how I see it now that I am older. Otherwise I'd stay single and enjoy life as a single man!
Praying that all will be well.
Wes, you have to realize you are a very young man. When we are young we are quick to jump the gun! With each journey you take you are learning more and more about yourself. Once you learn to be real with yourself, life will me much easier and fulfilling.
It is one of the pitfalls of marrying a foreign girl in a foreign land. Her family and her friends are on her side and you are alone. Even the friends you thought are your friends could essentially count as on her side cos they have more history/more in common with her rather than you.
There are countless history lessons on this in Chinese history where the woman's side gets too powerful. The side of the empress grew so powerful the emperor has no power. Sometimes it became so bad that the emperor's own family members are in danger. Check out the history of first empress of Han dynasty if you are interested. The real woman empress who can call herself "emperor" of Tan dynasty came to power the same way. An emperor at least would have people loyal to him to start with but you are alone in foreign land means you are alone unless you are a powerful businessman or something and can lift someone up and he/she be loyal to you in the community. Just my thoughts.
It is always a power play in human relationships. Either it with you own family, business relationship or so called love.
I would love human relations to just be ideal and be just about pure love and friendship but in reality it is not.
Exactly!
Smartest decision you made yet!🔥
gotta check the early signs @ the biginning of a relationship & review your tolerance level before 💯% commitment
never know what to look for tho while you're in it.
I've been that kind of experience.. but despite it's failed in marriage.. i stand up again and rebuild my life.. that's good move to get out on that kind of situation..move on.. be the best you can. ❤
I feel you bro. I had a relationship with a narciscist woman for 3 years, well, I discovered her bad traits later on. She said one day she betrayed me, just after I asked her in marriage. I guess it was a blessing. No kids, no divorce to file. But I was very sad and depressed for like 6 months. Now I'm healed! My advice is to finish a toxic relationship before kids or marriage. Because, kids and marriage don't save any relationship
Wes I’m sorry to hear about what happened to you but at the same time very happy you got out of it. You learning the culture and language have got nothing to do with those people. You committed and showed you are a great learner and as you said adaptive. You adapt really well and it’s just they could not adapt to you. Take those learnings, developed skills and enjoy your life. Keep enhancing your language, relationships and enjoy the ride. When you enjoy, be pure and do good things, then you become more receptive to more good things and blessings. These things do not only exist in church. Church should never dictate your relationship with God. Colombia isn’t the only Spanish-speaking country. You will use those skills and connect with other people. You’ll find a partner/friends that will respect you, will fight together with you on your side and are also worth fighting for.
Wow, this relationship appears so toxic. I think you both were good people who wanted the best out of the relationship but the differences were too much to overcome. Best wishes in your next journey.
DEEP sorry to hear that. tuff what you been through bro/
The threat voicemail sounded like an intro to a rap video.
lolol
Sorry for your experience!