"female" autism & borderline pd🌷

Sdílet
Vložit
  • čas přidán 10. 04. 2024
  • This video describes the most recent research around the often layered, and confusing, dynamics of presentations of both autism spectrum disorder and borderline personality disorder, and the emerging research around the "female autism phenotype"-- as it relates to both autism and bpd.
    Autism, especially in high masking women and girls, is often misdiagnosed. Instead of seeing ASD, clinicians have often seen BPD. While both ASD and BPD can co-exist, (and because trauma, social/gender expectations and a true lack of knowledge and awareness among clinicians and research exists)- too many autistic women and girls have been misdiagnosed with BPD, under-diagnosed, minimized, ignored, etc - and have truly suffered as a result.
    Additionally, while BPD appears to be present quite equally in both men and women, it has historically been primarily diagnosed as a "woman's disorder." Men tend to present BPD differently, and just like with ASD in women, we desperately need more research around the differing presentations for everyone.
    Lastly, ANYONE (regardless of how you identify) can present with an autistic or bpd presentation that looks like "female autism" or what bpd has previously been described to look like in women.
    Research articles used in this video:
    www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti... ASD and BPD individuals,difficulty controlling anger [15].
    www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
    www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
    journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1...
    🌷Here’s the link for the social camouflaging assessment on embrace autism:
    embrace-autism.com/cat-q/
    🌷Also love and appreciate neurodivergentinsights.com
    🌷FOR MORE INFORMATION ON DR. KIM SAGE'S ONLINE COURSES
    AND FREE CHECKLIST:
    www.drsagehelp.com
    Tik Tok. / drkimsage
    Instagram: / drkimsage
    Online courses: www.drkimsage.thinkific.com
    ***********************************************************************************
    HEALING FROM EGGSHELL PARENTS AND PARTNERS COURSE COMING SOON!!!

Komentáře • 140

  • @chelrichardson3351
    @chelrichardson3351 Před měsícem +48

    People in trauma can see through fake positivity . Your videos are very inviting because you don’t do the over the top long intro with fake smile … keep it real thankyou so much

  • @cherietillapaughhott1012
    @cherietillapaughhott1012 Před měsícem +24

    You have no idea how grateful I am for this video, and for you, especially, in your "quest" to know more about autism/borderline/cptsd: I found myself crying midway through, realizing how different my life could have been if I had been diagnosed early, and had been able to receive the proper treatment. If I could have even been recognized as more than just a difficult, disobedient, disorganized, angry, dramatic child who could "turn it on" when necessary: I can only imagine how my relationship with my parents and siblings could have been different, even better.
    Anyway, thank you for this. Please don't stop researching and sharing with us. I have a feeling there are more middle-aged women like myself who need this validation! ❤

    • @dorothythornton4993
      @dorothythornton4993 Před měsícem +2

      I am grateful for both your comment and this video. I wish I could've been supported better as a kid. Finding out at 40 has been interesting. I hope more families start sharing. Girls and women are highly under diagnosed.

  • @leilap2495
    @leilap2495 Před měsícem +25

    RSD and c-PTSD make this murky. I was misdiagnosed myself. I was looking within for what I was doing, as encouraged by my therapy. Instead of calling out their toxicity, I was attempting to reach impossible and ever changing standards by my abuser.

  • @user-me6un7ih3r
    @user-me6un7ih3r Před měsícem +19

    And THEN, to complicate things even further how to separate (AND/OR distinguish existing comorbid) diagnoses, we have ADHD thrown in the mix, with its' overlapping similarities like for instance impulsivity, emotional dysregulation, Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD), intense relationships(issues) and definetly being a trauma causing factor when un- or misdiagnosed. PLUS also the fact that Bipolar Disorder (BD) have many overlaps regarding the mood instabilities which often leads to a misdiagnosis or even get missed which can cause severe damage if not treated correctly. It's no wonder one can get lost in this jungle. Thank you Kim for sharing this important information and your work to sort all of this out ❤

  • @Coldnfallen
    @Coldnfallen Před měsícem +27

    Girls are made with sugar and spice, Barbie’s are plentiful and a dollhouse is nice with kitties and unicorns, too. Empathy drives their high masking eyes, and fear of doing anything wrong; rejection starts early.
    Safe with just family, criticized badly, and deep family secrets on all sides, trauma and war and struggle, hidden adoptions, illness and injury and rage… the burnout withdrawn and hiding reflecting and internalizing because social interaction burns you out even though your favorite topic is psychology and social sciences. Makeup application and the shape of my face. The times I looked myself in the mirror and learned how to smile in a socially acceptable manner.

    • @Nibiru3600X
      @Nibiru3600X Před měsícem +1

      💯🥺🙏❤️‍🩹🥹

  • @grand_air_trine_astro
    @grand_air_trine_astro Před měsícem +25

    I am twice diagnosed with ASD...one therapist suggested it was BPD however I am OBSESSIVELY studying certain subjects, can not hold 'normal' conversations. I stim/fidget, have cuddly toys to sleep with, am sensitive to light, always wear caps...none of these is BPD! I don't touch substence, no drink and am celibate...hardly what is linked with BPD.

    • @PrincessMicrowave
      @PrincessMicrowave Před měsícem +12

      I barely even believe in BPD at this point. Seems like it's just a way to dismiss difficult patients. Psychologists with their theory of mind cannot even define the term "personality" so I don't even understand how they can diagnose a personality "disorder"!
      Not that there's no such thing as fundamentally rotten people, but I'm very skeptical of these diagnostic terms, that's all 😊

    • @LittleGrayMouse
      @LittleGrayMouse Před měsícem +1

      @@PrincessMicrowave That's what this video is about though. They have different markers. Around 21.43 there's an comparison image.
      There's a definition of personality too.

    • @HillbillyYEEHAA
      @HillbillyYEEHAA Před měsícem +1

      You don't have to have sex to be bpd.
      It can be any behaviour that's impulsive. Gambling, drinking, sex, self harm..

    • @NewBird5
      @NewBird5 Před měsícem +1

      @@HillbillyYEEHAA autism factor helped me drink in social situations to cope among people , and self harm is also common among autistics. cause life is very hard for us. impulsivity is also common because of ADHD

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      ​@@HillbillyYEEHAA I do self harm but none of the other impulsive behaviors. And I haven't impulsively self harmed since I was a teenager. I now self harm once every year or two. I actually haven't self harmed since Nov. 2020. I have to be doing very badly for two weeks or more before I might act on self harm.
      Yet I was diagnosed with BPD even though I didn't meet the other requirements with interpersonal problems either. If you self harm they used to assume you were borderline. Lately some studies are coming out saying that not all people who self harm are borderline.

  • @crossXFaed
    @crossXFaed Před měsícem +23

    Thank you, Dr. Kim. I am an autistic woman but I also want to understand BPD better as well. 🙏🏻 I look forward to future videos on BPD and how presentation can differ between males and females. It boggles my mind how ASD is wrongly assumed to be a male exclusive/dominant condition and BPD a female one. God bless you 🙏🏻💙

    • @derekf9017
      @derekf9017 Před měsícem +1

      Visit places with ordered people, nevermind sexual differences. Visit disordered people in institutions. Interview. Makes notes. Youre not going to learn on YT. You know what you nd to do. Do it. Ur welcome. God bless

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem +1

      I have emotional dysregulation due to cPTSD. I was misdiagnosed with BPD because of self harming behaviors. I don't have unstable relationships or impulsivity. I did find DBT therapy over all very useful. I lost the Borderline diagnosis when I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I was diagnosed with level 2 autism much later. I am a bad actress so I am not high masking but most of your videos still make sense to me. I don't think that you have to be high masking for most of this to apply.

    • @crossXFaed
      @crossXFaed Před měsícem

      @@derekf9017 Oh most definitely I don't limit myself to only YT but I am grateful people like Dr. Kim use YT to help. I agree we shouldn't define nor judge persons themselves by their sex alone. But it is important however to understand how society and people's perception and expectations of sex, ASD, CPTSD, BPD and other conditions impacts me and other people affected by said views.
      And mind you, my interest in BPD beyond gendered assumptions goes beyond mere curiosity, but comes from personal experiences. Thank you so much for the comment and encouragement, Derek. I can tell this means deeply for you, too. I wish you, your dear ones and everyone here peace and good health. God bless you, as well. 🙏🏻💙

  • @ambermason9007
    @ambermason9007 Před 11 dny +1

    I struggle with so many of the same intricacies.. I had a childhood that fits complex trauma. (AOD, emotional unavailability, complex mental health issues in parents and siblings.. (death of sibling and parents when I was 9,10,12).
    I spent the majority of my life believing it was anxiety, depression, trauma. Invested my life in understanding psychology and coming to terms with these things, still feeling like there was ‘something’ else.. I truly believe I am autistic, but I have started to wonder if bpd is a possibility. Your videos are so clear and helpful in understanding the differences.

  • @carinaearl
    @carinaearl Před měsícem +2

    My mom is 1000% both. Autism runs in my family and my mom is diagnosed along with me. She was also severely abused and I'm learning that our relationship is textbook for bpd mom and daughter

  • @GraceHarwood88
    @GraceHarwood88 Před měsícem +4

    An undiagnosed autistic is likely very familiar with trauma.

  • @user-qq5bj8mk6v
    @user-qq5bj8mk6v Před měsícem +2

    The example of your mother not able to apologize or not apologizing , is not something I recognize in my personal life with full blown-bpd , or in anyone else I know with BPD - in fact quite the opposite.
    When someone deeply fears rejection we tend to over analyze ourselves - and over empathize with the other and then landing ourselves in dangerous situations.
    This is just anecdotal, but something to consider when giving information about a mental difference that you do not have yourself.
    I really enjoy your videos. Thank you for all of your research and please keep posting. This was a great video that really helped. Thank you :)

    • @WIPchilled
      @WIPchilled Před měsícem +1

      As someone with diagnosed BPD, I would like to challenge this comment with my own experience of the inability to apologise in my past. This is something I have recovered from now, but on reflection, my refusal to apologise lay in the triggering of the deep seated sense of shame and contempt that I held for myself.
      My thought process was "if I apologise, then I admit to myself and others that I am a bad person - if I choose not to apologise, I can temporarily avoid the all consuming and burning pain that comes with feeling worthless and evil".
      From what I understand, there are 4 subtypes of BPD, which can crossover and interchange.

  • @elliottrae9355
    @elliottrae9355 Před měsícem +1

    Thank you, Dr. Kim, for all that you do and share with us!

  • @spottedfawn639
    @spottedfawn639 Před měsícem

    Thank you for this. I'm glad you're still interested in this because I am too! Your series on this has helped me so much - this information over the past year has sent me down rabbit holes that have helped me understand myself and my family. Thank you! 💕

  • @LurkingLinnet
    @LurkingLinnet Před měsícem

    I'm so glad this is finally coming up, I had been theorizing and speculating this on my own for so long trying to put my puzzle pieces together and now to see this all backed up by research feels like a gift of god indeed. Thank you Mrs.Kim!

  • @grettamaeB
    @grettamaeB Před měsícem +2

    I love how cutting edge your content is! I enjoyed listening to your thought process about all of this and appreciate your disclaimers, wholistic perspective and willingness to share concepts as you learn about and come to better understand them. Thank you! ☺👍💓🙏

  • @pippopyadontstop
    @pippopyadontstop Před měsícem +1

    As someone who suspects they have ASD, I really appreciate your content Dr. Kim. The more I learn about cptsd, bpd, asd...it's hard to untangle them all from each other. Things are very murky. Regardless I appreciate you educating us in your spare time as I likely won't pursue a formal diagnosis (due to cost) nor therapy (also due to cost). Thank you for everything you do ❤

  • @kaitlinhillier
    @kaitlinhillier Před měsícem +5

    I was diagnosed with borderline but unsatisfied with the personality disorder thing. Glad I dug deeper and found out I'm also autistic and adhd.

  • @OTDMike67
    @OTDMike67 Před měsícem +2

    Dr. Kim. Thank you so much for this information. I have an abundance of ASM traits, and am in a relationship with a BPD. While it seems an almost impossible mis-match of personalities, it is very helpful to see the traits of each and to learn. Peace and Blessings to you, and also to your viewers. Mike

  • @LittleGrayMouse
    @LittleGrayMouse Před měsícem +5

    Well this is fascinating after watching the one about trauma and autism. I've been wondering about my daughter lately. I assumed her issue was autism, because she had some markers as a child but never diagnosed because she was also gifted and you know how that goes. My son was diagnosed very young though, with "severe autism" they called it back then mostly due to inability to communicate and he was just terribly dysregulated as a child. I know both of them are autistic, but my daughter sounds like she may have this borderline personality disorder as well. She has been through a lot of unfortunately self-induced trauma. She has so many scars and she seems to struggle with understanding why some of the things she says off-hand are terribly hurtful. And she's always apologetic but I feel like she never remembers next time. My son is far more careful with his words but he definitely struggles with ToM.
    I just don't know what to do with this information. She is an adult with no health insurance (TN did not expand medicaid and there is no subsidy if you don't earn enough money) and an aversion to mental health care after seeing what happened to me years ago when i was misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder. I am autistic and I got caught mid-sensory meltdown and five minutes later it was on my record. Just like that. It took years to get my diagnoses straightened out. I'm autistic. I have ADHD traits but I definitely don't have BPD as per your comparison chart.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      Were you misdiagnosed with bipolar (BD) or Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)?

  • @ashmac87
    @ashmac87 Před měsícem +1

    Thank you for doing this topic! I recently found out that I meet the criteria for both. It's been a long journey and I'm glad I finally have some answers.

  • @ANEE5AH
    @ANEE5AH Před měsícem +1

    Thank you for sharing this! ❤

  • @shaynalee
    @shaynalee Před měsícem +2

    This resonates so much with me and my life experience
    Thank you ❤

  • @azcactusflower1
    @azcactusflower1 Před měsícem +1

    Excellent, I will watch again. It's an important topic of comparisons

  • @flyygurl18
    @flyygurl18 Před měsícem

    Thank you Dr Kim for further developing further clarification and understanding; and also for bringing us along this very unique journey of self discovery. It really is fascinating to see how the way we are socialised (as girls) has shaped our development uniformly though with different contexts and a broad spectrum

  • @hcrisc
    @hcrisc Před 27 dny

    Thank you so much for this video, Dr Kim.

  • @shayekisitu
    @shayekisitu Před měsícem

    Both of these sound eerily familiar to me and describe how I feel and my emotions and instability. Thank you Dr. Kim.

  • @PrincessMicrowave
    @PrincessMicrowave Před měsícem +6

    Id like to hear someone with your education speak about the definition of personality. As far as I understand, psychology doesn't have a real good sturdy definition of what a personality is, how it is formed or how much it csn change. How does this affect the reliability of *personality* disorder diagnoses?

  • @sarahjaye4117
    @sarahjaye4117 Před měsícem

    Thank you. I suspect I have both even without a bad childhood and have tried dbt w out the diagnosis but sensitivity and generational trauma plus having adhd, sensory issues, hypersensitivity, severe anxiety and other health issues. No one in my family has been tested or would want to be but i feel like sis, me, brother , das all some level of ASD but no one will ever talk to anyone about this but me, like a psych or therapist. It feels brutal feeling like this, like both might match plus the adhd and ocd spectrum. Thank you for this video, I like your presentation style, thanks so much 🧡

  • @hayleykelly9989
    @hayleykelly9989 Před měsícem

    Hi Kim,
    Loving the video… fellow therapist here :)
    Another layer is that where there is often perceived or hyper vigilance around rejection in bpd…. ASD folk experience repetitive chronic rejection from the outside world not just from caregivers, but from peers, teachers, employers etc in both micro incidences or quite huge traumatic ones.
    I think the bottom line is that it’s absolutely impossible to ever 💯 know what is ASD and what is trauma based reactions.
    Through therapy we can unpick it somewhat and uncover our own truth.
    For me it’s a mixture of ASD and trauma. But since learning about ASD and applying it to myself and my story things feel a lot lighter and as though they make a lot more sense.
    Peace ✌🏻🌷

  • @amirachokri4084
    @amirachokri4084 Před měsícem +1

    Thank you so much Dr Kim, what you say is really very helpful and insightful !!! ❤❤ please keep analyzing. You helped me a lot to understand what am dealing with.

  • @megancooper376
    @megancooper376 Před 19 dny

    My life makes sense now ❤ diagnosed BPD but since having my baby and realising the cause of many meltdowns is sensory, and doing EMDR for trauma, putting that behind me and realising my main issues like social anxiety and inability to read people are still here, I think its Autism mixed with trauma. Makes perfect sense now

  • @sakaimae
    @sakaimae Před měsícem

    Just wanted to say, I love your videos as someone who's just finished an MSc in clinical psychology (hoping to get my doctorate after I've got more experience in the field) and also who thinks they might be autistic. I'm a trans guy myself, but been brought up as female, so I find these sorts of videos really interesting. Thanks

  • @denisevaughn5428
    @denisevaughn5428 Před měsícem +4

    Has that been difficult, finding out about your father later in life? I found out at 18 (I'm 54) and still don't feel like I've "gotten over it". Also, I think I'm autistic, but undiagnosed. I think maybe so is my mother, or BPD or both. There has been alot of trauma, growing up and throughout. Thanks for your videos.

  • @cielrobinson
    @cielrobinson Před měsícem +10

    I'm nonbinary, I personally don't identify as having any gender at all, but I was raised and am still socially percieved as female. In my opinion a more accurate and inclusive way to refer to what is usually termed "females with autism" might be "individuals socialized/raised as female". I think that the things we are encouraged/punished for doing, along with the differing acceptable treatment, expectations and responses from adults, between "boys" and "girls", from when we are infants, accounts for a majority of the differences between what people perceive as a male or female "phenotype" of autism.

    • @amberinthemist7912
      @amberinthemist7912 Před měsícem

      I agree. Excellent points.

    • @elliottrae9355
      @elliottrae9355 Před měsícem

      Really good insights, thank you! As a nonbinary person too, it's hard to see where I fit into things as someone with CPTSD, maybe BPD or neurodivergency.

    • @amandamandamands
      @amandamandamands Před měsícem +1

      Yes agree that socialisation makes a big difference.
      Also I am used to seeing AFAB and AMAB if you are wanting to refer to something that is binary as that is the actual information they are going by, not even chromosomes (otherwise things like Swyer Syndrome would throw them all for a loop)

  • @Nancy-cm1rh
    @Nancy-cm1rh Před měsícem +1

    I understand. Keep up the gooooood work!😊 U, know / if, u know, u know!!!!!!!❤❤ty.

  • @WithLoveLsJournals
    @WithLoveLsJournals Před měsícem

    It's interesting that you made this video. After a pretty bad emotional episode recently I've decided to look into BPD and it definitely lines up with how I function... but I also highly suspect I have autism at the same time. I've thought that for years now. I have both issues, fear of abandonment & sensory sensitivity. I have a psychologist appointment in a few days ... I hope they take me seriously. I am already afraid of more trauma 😔

  • @jaymeleonhard3764
    @jaymeleonhard3764 Před měsícem +2

    What about PDA? It is now diagnosed in the UK as part of the autism spectrum. PDA presents very different and is driven by a need for autonomy.

  • @deec411
    @deec411 Před měsícem +5

    I think borderline personality disorder is typically thought of as a woman problem partially due to the common trait of emotional outbursts, etc. also the connection with the movie Fatal Attraction. While autism is thought to be a more "silent" disorder with social awkwardness and withdrawal as common symptoms. Just my opinion. 😊

    • @LadyForestia
      @LadyForestia Před měsícem +5

      BPD is like the modern version of female hysteria.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem +1

      I am an extroverted autistic person who can be loud or silent. I was misdiagnosed with BPD.

  • @digglydog
    @digglydog Před měsícem +2

    Suggestion for the sex linked research: Just use male and female. I think that should suffice to communicate the information and allow any individuals who have gender identity issues to see how the research applies to them personally.

  • @kara-ib5nd
    @kara-ib5nd Před měsícem +1

    This is very interesting & a great discussion. I am diagnosed ASD ADHD . I have a background in psychology . My own thoughts stemming very much from my own autistic experience is that the loss of emotional control meltdown in ASD & BDP look different. ASD meltdown comes with screaming, hitting , rocking & hiding. It's very animalistic. These behaviours are hidden I rarely show in public. They are also nonverbal . In BDP crisis I have witnessed there is a great deal of crying distress, some screaming possible self harm but it's verbal & a lot more lucid .
    In autism there is a lot of processing difference. My 'cogs' than think for me that build my logical world work very differently. This shows in memory spacial all sorts.
    In BPD these cogs are more in the typical way of thinking logically & navigating the world .
    That & I can also become non verbal , I am monotonic, I have ptsd
    Although in relationship I attach and detach differently, relationships don't wound me much.
    The difference lie very much underneath the surface, and cognitive tests are a valuable, diffential .
    Agreed on the surface both can look very similar& both contain trauma, both are very painful.
    My close friend has BDP in so many ways I see potential for diagnosis overlap. However, under the surface, we are very different, and we are very
    Also Pervasive Development disorder doesn't get mentioned enough & I wish it were .
    High masking autism which what I have, unmasks in private & is very much more visible.
    Agree female autism is diffent
    Because BDP is so painful & can be helped with therapy, my concern is that many women woth BPD & cPTSD are self diagnosed or miss diagnosed austic and not getting the correct support or self understanding.
    Thanks for a great video

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      I don't know about self diagnosis but as far as a professional diagnosis it is much easier to get a Borderline Personality Disorder diagnosis than an autism diagnosis if you are a woman (from what I have read).

  • @mariecait
    @mariecait Před 26 dny

    Thank you. I am so lost. 😢

  • @LeahIHarris
    @LeahIHarris Před 7 dny

    Wow this is blowing my mind. I was diagnosed with BPD as a teenager and it never felt right and I rejected it even though some of it resonated. I’ve been suspecting for some time that I am undiagnosed autistic (I’m 48)

  • @Justafan333
    @Justafan333 Před měsícem

    ‘Psychiatry and psychotherapy podcast’ on CZcams has an excellent episode on BPD, which is also available on Spotify.
    It’s one of the best podcasts in the way of mental health disorders I’ve come across.

  • @gemf3813
    @gemf3813 Před měsícem +1

    It’s also important to include FASD and developmental trauma into these comparisons. So many of the symptoms of FASD cross over with ASD and ADHD. My adopted daughter is diagnosed with all four plus PDA. My adopted son is borderline for ASD, has diagnosed developmental trauma and ADHD, and has a lot of the behaviours of ASD but FASD is most likely driving things too. You could look at their presentations and suggest BPD. It’s so complex to tease each one out to diagnose.

    • @mlr4524
      @mlr4524 Před měsícem

      Adoptee here (and survivor of dysfunctional home). I presume you realize that Adoption itself is Trauma and will do what you can to love and support them. And yes, it's next to impossible to pull out the threads of C-PTSD, adoptee trauma, and any other emotional/'mental' issues.

    • @gemf3813
      @gemf3813 Před měsícem

      Yes I’m very aware of the trauma issues related to adoption and ensuring the children have as much support as I can access to help them with the impact both in terms of neurodevelpmental impact and emotional. I spend a lot of time educating people about these things to try and raise awareness. 😃

  • @kalonicamcquesten692
    @kalonicamcquesten692 Před měsícem +1

    Emotional lability. We can have ups and downs, right? Not liability. Not always causing harm.

  • @VerminaeSupremacy
    @VerminaeSupremacy Před měsícem

    My mom seems like classic case of BPD, Adult Child of an Alcoholic, never learned to regulate her emotions and had love/hate relationships with my pretty certain on the spectrum dad. Seems like these types of people gravitate toward each other, just like anxious and avoidant attachment types, they compensate each other’s issues or just keep recreating unhealthy dynamics they’re used to. I myself am female but took after father. They used to misdiagnose me with everything, BPD included, but as soonas I separated from mom I became peaceful and less anxious about keeping up with people around me because nobody else is blaming me for being blind to their emotions and grievances and only ever offering logical solutions. I don’t feel emotions, spare for wrath and mild satisfaction, myself even though I used to when I was younger and less settled in my routines

  • @jimtome3554
    @jimtome3554 Před měsícem +2

    I’ve been following you for many months and this is a most interesting, comprehensive and thought provoking presentation. I am a husband and father to a wife (30 plus years) and three beautiful daughters all but one of whom presents as the research suggests. However, to be clear, I love them deeply and find they all have an irrepressible charism and beauty about them that is unique and so very attractive to most anyone and everyone they meet. Perhaps this is a gift from God to help moderate those of us who present as neurotypical and regulated, because we sure do make a mess of things! And I count you among those that possess the interior beauty of which I speak. Thank you. 🙏🏼

  • @Melissa12877
    @Melissa12877 Před měsícem +1

    Thank you so mutch for diving in to this. I think i am complete bin misdiagnosed with almost everything. I dont feel or experience any of the thinks anymore. I am no 36. Or can it be ive bin curret . Sorry for my english I am from the Netherlands. I believe i only have trauma. Because that started at the time I wass a kid

  • @sierraerdman8697
    @sierraerdman8697 Před měsícem

    This is REALLY interesting to me, as I've been diagnosed BPD... and now my son is recently diagnosed adhd and then asd level 1.... i have si much trauma, they went give me an adhd diagnosis... but i suspect asd.

  • @jazmo6662
    @jazmo6662 Před měsícem +2

    I am 67 and totally confused. My mother was a paranoid schizophrenic with multiple personalities and rejected me. She didn't want me. So I'm pretty sure I have CPTSD and from what I have discovered, I also believe I have ASD as well. From this video I think I may have BPD too. I am waiting for diagnosis of ASD. I've been waiting for 4 years. I have managed to survive but hiding everything and pretending but fear that as I get older, my ability to cope and deal with all this is getting harder. I am alone and suffering but I don't where or who to turn to for help. I have tried but I don't know how to explain what help I need or even if it exists. Sometimes I think it's too late now.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      I am sorry that your mother didn't want you. Mine said that she didn't want us kids as well. It is very harmful.
      So your mother had schizophrenia and multiple personalities (now known as DID)? That is really unusual.

  • @ANL111
    @ANL111 Před 6 dny

    You have taken a decade-long suspicion of mine of the connection between Autism and cluster Bs. Oh my. I have been trying to figure out my ex-husband for three decades. Now I Know what he has.

  • @ginas.6656
    @ginas.6656 Před měsícem +1

    I must be both. A couple people mentioned why i change the conversation subject so quickly n i didn't know that i did lol until then. But one person felt slightly hurt thinking i wasn't being supportive but i was n i pick up very quickly what someone means without going into a lengthy conversation. And the other person asks why i change subjects that's when i realized there was something that i didn't have the answer to. Then i came across your videos and maybe I'm autistic...never thought i was but i did have both childhood (neglect) n adult (domestic violence) trauma
    So how does one start working with ptsd? I'm also HSP.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      HSP and Borderline?

    • @ginas.6656
      @ginas.6656 Před 13 dny

      @@Catlily5 possibility?

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před 13 dny

      @@ginas.6656 They seem like opposites to me.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před 13 dny

      @@ginas.6656 At least the part of HSP where they claim have good interpersonal skills.

  • @Coolness6179
    @Coolness6179 Před měsícem +4

    What do you think about “Quiet” BPD?

    • @IntegrityMeansAll
      @IntegrityMeansAll Před měsícem +4

      probably similar to high masking autism in a way (as to them not revealing it to most people but only those very close to them/the ones they interact with daily)..

  • @saminarose6688
    @saminarose6688 Před měsícem

    Wow. This was so informative and yes, I have had so many diagnosis until I got ASD. I still struggle to believe it and sometimes say it's all symptoms of high intelligence. Still the sensory stuff are strongly present. My mom definitely has autism even though with the culture and generational trauma it was mixed up with a lot of abusive behavior. My dad is the type with low sensory. He is now starting to show severe psychological symptoms 😢 still they are both very immature and I'm done wearing the mask of the one who has it all together.
    The way you gathered and analyzed the data is very much like how I do it with my special interest. I'm afraid of saying something that turns out to be untrue yet as long as it helps us to discover something new then that's what matters, like all the atomic models that were simplistic

  • @alexsandraAPRN
    @alexsandraAPRN Před měsícem

    I think my mother is BPD. As young as I can remember I saw her having major emotional outbursts. She has try to hurt herself so many times. She never apologizes. One time when she was spending time at my house I asked her to dim the lights in the kitchen because it was late and I was going to sleep and she proceeded to grab a knife and threaten to kill herself. My sister and I have different levels of CPTSD. My nice is autistic non-verbal diagnosed at age of 3. It’s all so much 😢.

  • @robbielynmccrary872
    @robbielynmccrary872 Před měsícem +1

    adhd comorbid with ASD so bpd is adhd gone bad, then bpd and ASD makes sense

  • @EizaPizza
    @EizaPizza Před 28 dny

    I feel like i have either one of these after watching your videos on bpd, cptsd now this one. I self harm, used to cut now i just hit myself. I threatened my ex partners and friends I didn’t want to lose with s^!$ide if they wanted to break up. Obviously had childhood trauma - was raised in a home with domestic violence, neglect and SA from another family member. There’s more, but maybe i’m not any of these. I have strong suicide thoughts and I breakdown over them because I’m scared i’ll do it given how impulsive i am. When I’m angry I break and throw things, i can’t calm myself down. I want to rage and m*rd3r. I fear i’m not good enough. I feel chronically empty and numb. I now avoid relationships and friendships because I worry they’re going to leave me. And again there’s a lot more but I’ve been referred to psychodynamic therapy. Would a person with autism be referred for that? I haven’t been diagnosed with anything at all so far. I really want an answer because I have struggling to cope for years. I’m not enjoying therapy. I want to work on my reactions and emotions to things but I’m not getting that.

  • @theresalewis961
    @theresalewis961 Před 29 dny +1

    I'm not diagnosed with neither only epilepsy grand mall I'm adopted or stolen baby seizures occur when I sleep and other times thru out the day

  • @HillbillyYEEHAA
    @HillbillyYEEHAA Před měsícem

    My sister has bpd and cptsd. She's also dyslexic like me. I have cptsd, social anxiety, anxiety, and physical health issues from stress.
    We are both broken and struggle.
    I thought for years i might be autistic or have adhd, adhd runs on my dads side, he has it, my aunt has it, my cousin..
    Its all confusing .

    • @laurah2831
      @laurah2831 Před měsícem

      Dyslexia highly comorbid with adhd, you might already know

  • @Noel.Chmielowiec
    @Noel.Chmielowiec Před měsícem

    Dr Kim, what do you think is the best way to approach a new doctor that you think previous psychiatrist misdiagnosed you? I have bipolar disorder, that I know for a fact has to be true because I was diagnosed by 2 psychiatrist independently, but year ago I got BPD diagnosis, however I don't think that meet the criteria. The doctor said that I 'clearly look like someone with both bipolar and borderline', I don't know what she meant, she had seen me for an hour and a half if we would summed up every visit to this point and didn't tell me what criteria I've met, I never said that I struggle with feelings of abandoned because that's just not true. However I can clearly see (and my friend who I know since I was 6, so almost 23 years) that I meet a lot of criteria for autism diagnosis. Is it possible to ask for some ASD diagnosis tests and don't look like you try to self diagnose? I know doctors can be very judgemental, so I have no idea what to do about it. I just want someone to either confirm or deny that's ASD so I can be treated accordingly.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      If you have done research, tell the doctor all the symptoms and reasons you think that you have autism. Then see what they say. If they don't say autism then ask for an assessment.

  • @cheryldailing1294
    @cheryldailing1294 Před měsícem

    I am extremely interested in this differential diagnosis. What resonates with me in distinguishing my mother's issues is intent. She demonstrates this need for control and also exhibits knowledge that she is hurting and insulting people. Id imagine that this wouldn't apply in autism
    She is certainly narcissistic and BPD..can be confused with high functioning autism in her lack of normal social behavior...it's the intent part. She is very different, depending on who she is interacting with

  • @davinxi5926
    @davinxi5926 Před měsícem

    Is BPD more prevalent in one gender? Than the other M or F? Is it also environmentally factored ie prison, lockdowns, 4:27

    • @IntegrityMeansAll
      @IntegrityMeansAll Před měsícem

      It can be present in both genders but sociopathy and psychopathy are more common in men (for various reasons e.g. certain genes etc etc) according to psychologists and countless research

  • @Catlily5
    @Catlily5 Před měsícem

    I saw a video on autism research in women. It showed that a lot of the genes associated with autism are different in men and women. I thought that was interesting.

  • @jazz_honey
    @jazz_honey Před měsícem +1

    I do see the importance of understanding that these types of mental illnesses can show differently in females. However, I'm not sure why it was necessary to emphasize the "white males" aspect. Seems pretty normal as the grandfathers of Psychology were Europeans and for their time-period. -- An example, figure drawing models, had to be men, as it was illegal for men to draw nude women in a classroom or publicly. So if you look at Micheal Angelos's artwork, he also used "white males" as references to sculpt and paint his women. This was normal then.
    Let's not forget a BPD woman was the one who came up with DBT, AND who wasn't a doctor yet. A lot has changed since then, and women are now dominating the mental health practice, academically and clinically... We're all here on this planet for a short while, let's continue to share and learn from one another :)

  • @christinadonnelly781
    @christinadonnelly781 Před 18 hodinami

    Dr. Kim to me it seems like the fact that there is such a spectrum in Autistic people that there also can be a spectrum in these PDs. I feel like i have significant cPTSD from being Autistic and most of the trauma stemming from relationship trauma ( parents, friends, teachers, and past partners) all before i knew inwas Autistic. How can we draw a line and say..this is a person that is Autistic that has relationship trauma and not BPD or this person is Autistic and has BPD. Is it even worthwhile doing so? I don't know any Autistic person that doesn't have relationship trauma. Is it even worth the label? I am just thinking as i will be starting a master's in clinical psychology soon.

  • @alphadog3384
    @alphadog3384 Před měsícem +2

    Do you believe that borderline personality burns its self out in the aging process?

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      Borderline Personality Disorder is said to improve with age. 🤷🏻‍♀️

    • @alphadog3384
      @alphadog3384 Před měsícem

      @@Catlily5 I say to a degree, choosing our battles? But if an individual lacks insight, or awareness in relationships, well then.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      @@alphadog3384 My guess is that most people improve somewhat on social skills over their lifetime. Even people who are Borderline.

  • @johnbillings5260
    @johnbillings5260 Před 22 dny

    If not for watching videos on "female autism" I don't know if I would have figured out that I had it. I had all the professionals fooled (as well as myself without knowing). I have to wonder how many men aren't diagnosed because of this. I got caught on the other side of the sexism.

  • @mkatseal
    @mkatseal Před měsícem +1

    No. High masking is not a substitute for high functioning. You can be hugh functioning and never masked or have extremely little ability or have the idea you are supposed to change your behavior for different settings or people. It also really downplays how much worse level 3 really is. It ignores the more severe symptoms like being non-verbal. It once again decenters the people who are most unable to communicate and advocate for themselves.

    • @mkatseal
      @mkatseal Před měsícem

      And what is this assumption that all autistic people mask or it even occurs to them to do it? Sure, some do. But most I have met, they don't have the thought that they are supposed to alter their behavior or any desire or interest to fit in. In some I've seen a complete disinterest of people as a concept (or it kicks in only after puberty).

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      I am diagnosed with level 2 autism and I thought that part of the reasoning was because I don't mask according to them. I think that I mask a little bit. But levels are supposed to be support needs so I don't know what masking has to do with that.

  • @artosbear
    @artosbear Před 17 dny

    BPD which is just trauma is current fashionable word for calling femme people hysterical.

  • @zrienkersh1475
    @zrienkersh1475 Před měsícem

    Wouldn’t autistic people also be seeking out social relationships a lot less than BPD people?

  • @Zoleankico4267
    @Zoleankico4267 Před měsícem

    Wow! Over the past 25 years, I’ve been to several therapists! Very few listened, most wanted to give meds, (that made things worse). The last one I saw, did not take the time to get to know me, or my mental state before beginning emdr. I had a lot going on, and I trusted her…BIG MISTAKE!!! She used this type of therapy on me every week, sometimes twice a week, for 5 months. That was in 2019, and it took me till last summer to even start feeling better!!! These two “disorders” overlapping, sounds dead on for what I experience on the regular. Since getting away from my sociopath ex husband, and extremely toxic mother, I’m very picky about who I hang out with. I’ve tried a couple of closer friendships recently; but felt manipulated and guilt tripped far too much. Some of that could be me, but regardless, it makes me not want to try anymore.
    Anyway I appreciate your video, as I’m not interested in trying therapy again either. It’s just too much….

  • @laymayday
    @laymayday Před měsícem +1

    I’m going to dig into my childhood with my therapist soon. That’s going to be so much fun 🫠

  • @brigitteduchaine8714
    @brigitteduchaine8714 Před měsícem +1

    Hy, i really like your vidéos but please can you speak more slowly for french canadien like me?😉

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      You can slow down the video. Go to the gear in the top corner and pick playback speed.

  • @derekf9017
    @derekf9017 Před měsícem

    Keep up the good investigation. Want to mention pregnancy changes neurodivs brains permanently, physically.

    • @derekf9017
      @derekf9017 Před měsícem

      As a secondary comment, DBT would be more effective if done at a monastery. We could look at different population dbt as more effective. Thats the future. DBT differences. Funding is tough. People are stuck in the same environments trying to solve different problems. Clinic doesnt work. Groups don't work. Memory shaping works.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      ​@@derekf9017DBT helped me but it turns out that I am not Borderline after all.

  • @Yeodoongiiie
    @Yeodoongiiie Před měsícem +13

    My mom is BPD. Me and my siblings are autistic. Soooooooo let’s just say we were all very traumatized by her.

    • @IntegrityMeansAll
      @IntegrityMeansAll Před měsícem +3

      She could be both. I know a woman who is all 3 and she did everything to destroy my and some other ppl’s lives

    • @Yeodoongiiie
      @Yeodoongiiie Před měsícem +1

      @@IntegrityMeansAll she's not.

    • @IntegrityMeansAll
      @IntegrityMeansAll Před měsícem

      @@Yeodoongiiie okay, but they say autism is genetic to a high extent..and it would be possible since one doesn’t exclude the other. But you know her better

    • @Yeodoongiiie
      @Yeodoongiiie Před měsícem

      @@IntegrityMeansAll yeah stranger. I THINK I know my own mother better than you do. you forget I also have a dad….

    • @IntegrityMeansAll
      @IntegrityMeansAll Před měsícem

      @@Yeodoongiiie you sound like you might have a personality disorder yourself

  • @mollywhitman5219
    @mollywhitman5219 Před měsícem

    Does ‘normal’ really exist?

  • @robbielynmccrary872
    @robbielynmccrary872 Před měsícem +1

    bpd is adhd gone bad dr tony atwood australia

  • @tahsinaaron5563
    @tahsinaaron5563 Před měsícem

    Neuroscience (behavioural) has complexity (multiple meanings) based on context/situation, examples taken from cinematic expressions, Could be more accurate in terms of connectivity between brains & behaviour (nom autistic & autistic both) in real life for sure.
    Scene 1:
    czcams.com/video/-hNbw5_HnC0/video.htmlsi=kuAmhL2NRUCZ0t9F
    (00:25)
    Perceiving message: A (female) brain has decided what to like eventually (by nurturing) going further in roughly 3-4 seconds.
    Action speed: Super fast
    Scene 2:
    czcams.com/video/lirFVzXW-sI/video.htmlsi=UOB91_AHx4CtxWMm
    (01:11)
    Perceiving message: A brain (female) has saved data of ‘trust and faith’ (built in) but without the ‘secured opportunity’, the brain could not function in decades.
    Action speed: Super Slow
    Scene 3:
    czcams.com/video/hhRBMSWpzRc/video.htmlsi=kL6F2BxoOGc4ZhJj
    (01:42)
    Perceiving message: A brain so confident that does not go beyond of traditional way, That the reason of losing object/emotion is inevitable and almost unpredictable for any speculation
    Action speed: Almost unknown!
    Takeaway: Brain has different ways of expressing views varies subject to subject, can be simple/multiple/complex. Without detecting the correct one, Is it possible to determine the ‘caught up’?
    Please note: A specialist can give further explanation than general observer.
    Cheers

  • @chriswatton572
    @chriswatton572 Před měsícem

    but dr do people really want to know they have borderline personality disorder? to no they may have would not help, that is my belief. i no few thingson this topic. God Bless

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před měsícem

      I was not upset when they said that I had Borderline Personality Disorder until some of the mental health professionals started treating me very badly.
      Then I hated the diagnosis and was very happy when I found out that they had misdiagnosed me. I was actually bipolar. And later I found out that I also am autistic.

  • @theresalewis961
    @theresalewis961 Před 29 dny

    Maniac depression

  • @Akutikun
    @Akutikun Před 9 dny

    Enough with the nonsense of "how you identify". You either are something or you are not.