Forcing Women Into The Workforce was a MISTAKE w/ Dr. Jennifer Morse
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- čas přidán 21. 06. 2022
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I ask Dr. Morse what forcing women into the workforce has done to society. She explains how the deconstruction of marriage, infertility, and divorce rates are all a part of the picture.
Dr. Morse's Book "The Sexual State:" amzn.to/3mkMesv
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As a woman born after the feminist movement, I am honestly angry with the women who bought into the " women can do anything a man can do"...I believe it helped ruined the family nucleus and has also forced our country into having to have both parents working. Women of the 60s and 70s pretty much ruined it for women like me who always wanted to stay home and raise my babies.
Word!
Also the fact that now we feel kinda shamed for it like oh she's just a house wife, no big career or education accomplishments, but honestly history remembers very few and really we just got to live life and find our happiness thats my mission
You're saying "women of the 60s and 70s had 100% control of the ECONOMY? And, women CAN do anything men can do. What does that have to do with your CHOICES.
@@Maleetorres105 I'd rather be able to use punctuation.
@Laura Heraly Stop blaming other women for your CHOICES.
I went to college and got two college degrees and was ready to go in the career world. I had no interest in children or if they were to come along, there was no way I was going to "wipe butts all day" as I put it. Then years later I became pregnant and I saw my little one on the ultrasound and everything changed. I quit as soon as I could and spent every second taking care of myself and when my baby girl arrived, there was nowhere I would rather be than taking care of her day and night. There was no job that could fulfill me in this way.
God made it clear to me, leave your job because it is taking too much time away from your family and stressing me out in my pregnancy. One of the best decisions of my life and my husband was 100% for it. Brillant !
@@hanettasavary8788 It is amazing how God works. I always marvel at how different 40 year old me is from 20 year old me. Almost two different people and I credit that solely to our Lord. He knew I would have been miserable in the working world even though I insisted that's what I wanted.
And Hillary Clinton said she wasn’t going to stay home and bake cookies. There has been mocking and shaming towards stay at home mamas! It’s the best job in the world! I could always work when they are older and jack up my Social Security and IRA benefit contributions. Wild hoses couldn’t have made me leave infants at a daycare. We had the best life ever.
So is it worth it to spend money on 2 degrees if you won't use it professionally? Thats great it worked out for you but for others it hasnt.
@@VelveteenRabbit77 You are so correct. I'm fairly sure my assessment of motherhood at the time was influenced by this shaming. I'm just glad that I was true to myself and lived the life that I was meant to live and not how society said I should live. It really is the best life ever.
This is so comforting, cause I was 16 y.o when I got into med school, now I’m 24 years old and due to certain circumstances and to some people I met I was so drawn by that career focus mentality or narrative that I completely despise being with people, mostly men, I hated men so much, that I started saying things like « I hate weddings, I would never get married », With many other things I was so unhappy, and my faith was also fluctuating constantly, until when I was in my last year I realized apart from medicine I didn’t know anything, so I started learning philosophy online, watching debates and fell into nihilism, stoicism and all that until God brought me back, I have left the Church when I was 15, and I’m so happy now to be back home and learning that being a woman is okay, wanting to get married is okay, and somehow I also reconciled with many other « feminine traits » of myself God is good
God bless you.
Early twenties too. Glad I've come the full circle back to Christ. Its so freeing leaving behind all the nihilism and the godlessness the world pushes onto you. Learning to hunger for things of God and learning to be a man in line with God is a very fulfilling. God is good
The Truth does set us free indeed.
God bless you Hilary! you are a revert to the one true Church. (me, too!)
I wonder how many people actually get married anymore or do they just have casual sex and live on their own.
I’ve noticed rap😳 and grooming gangs etc increasing rapidly, also lonely men who can’t find any woman to love them go crazy and kill in schools etc etc and kill themselves, because life has no purpose anymore.
This is so encouraging to hear! As young women we are conditioned to believe that our desires to be mothers is unnatural and wrong and it should be a priority to have a a career rather than a family. Growing up I always knew I wanted to be a stay at home mother for my children, I had very little interest in having a career until after my children are grown and independent of me. I’m so thankful I stayed true to my hearts desire to be a mother, now I have a toddler and one on the way. My husband loves being a provider for us. He feels like this is what he is meant to do as his role just like I love being a provider of love and comfort for our children and our home.
Most families can't afford to live off of one income
@@MidwestPyro55 well it depends on the income and area
If you're not planning things right then yh it's not possible
But if you're doing things right you'd be doing fine
@@velkyn1 The atheist stalks Christian pages to insult and degrade others. Entirely unsurprising.
@@MidwestPyro55 Exactly. Try living off one income in a place like California on a blue collar income because that's not happening. That wouldn't even cover the utility bill.
@@velkyn1 Particular Protestantism.
I’m a stay-at-home mom of 4 little children. I’m very talented, I’m very intelligent. But I use these skills in child-rearing, and not for some company for which I’m dispensable. This is where I belong. I’m honored to be at home raising these beautiful, wonderful children.
OK 👍now leave women who don't want to do that alone. cuz the fcking issue is its not just "people nowadays hate stay at home mums stop the hate :(" its "actually ALL women should be stay at home mums ugh those brainwashed feminists who dont wanna be financially independent on a man silly women" reality is MOST WOMEN ARE STILL TOLD THEY SHOULD GET MARRIED AND HAVE CHILDREN ESPECIALLY IN NON WESTERN COUNTRIES giving women the option to work isn't stopping women like you being stay at home mothers
God bless you endlessly 🙏🙏🙏. The entire heaven be with you 💞❣️❣️❣️🙏.
Child rearing is not a skill , you are raising a human being not making a car, and by the way,I hope your husband is also raising your children ,we don't want your children having daddy issues
@@purplelove3666raising a child is a skill that requires many other skills. Arguably the most important skills required for human life. If you stand by what you say in that comment, I employ u to read it out loud to your mother and see what she says
Same with my wife. She’s very smart and it shows in how she runs our household. No way I’d have anyone else rear our kids. Sending 6 month olds, or any age for that matter, to daycare is absolutely insane.
On the other side of this....my mother was born in 1950, went to college, married right out of college, my father would not allow her to work, they had children. They were married for 15 years and he then had an affair, divorced her, left her with two young kids to raise (6 and 8) and very little financial support. My mother did all she could to be the "good wife." He never lifted a finger to help around the house or help raise us as kids. If she had not gotten her teaching degree, she would have been completely lost. She HAD to work, go back to school, and bring up two kids practically alone. I think all people need to think practically about their futures in case they are left to fend for themselves.
Amen. There are more than two sides to this issue. And I think that when discussions are had about this, it is incredibly black or white.
There is a ton of holes in this story and does a great job at painting the woman as a victim.
@@ApolloTheLeaderHave you considered that the woman in this story may very much be the victim? Being a victim should not have a negative connotation. Men can be victims of women as well and it certainly should be discussed more. No one’s saying men are immune to this fact. However, because of the societal dynamic that has played out for centuries, there’s a reason why women are statistically more likely to suffer from neglect , abuse, and other violent crimes at the hands of men. To act as if this isn’t the reality is foolish to say the least.
And that situation is why alimony is a thing. It assumes the spouse has no work history/education and will struggle to support themselves.
@@ApolloTheLeader
Except these things happened.
Alimony and child support were the answer to dead-beat husbands and fathers.
Prohibition was a real thing because men were abandoning their responsibilities, leaving their homes, and drinking their paychecks away.
Men have, historically, taken the lazy way out and refused to take care of the families they promised to provide for and protect.
It’s a trope for a reason. If women are expected to stay home and raise their children and be a good wife…they are obligated to have a man who provides and protects their right to do so.
If she forgoes education and a career she needs support.
Men have, absolutely, abandoned their duties and put a lot of women in impossible situations.
Convincing women that they'd be happier in a cubical working for a company that sees them as a cog in the machine than they would at home surrounded by people who love them is the biggest trick that's ever been pulled in our society. Unfortunately, the genie is out of the bottle. This contributed to the current state of affairs where for the vast majority of families now, two incomes are absolutely necessary.
The key phrase here is "surround by people who love them." Many women went to work because there was no love in their homes.
I wonder how many people actually get married anymore or do they just have casual sex and live on their own.
I’ve noticed rap😳 and grooming gangs etc increasing rapidly, also lonely men who can’t find any woman to love them go crazy and kill in schools etc etc and kill themselves, because life has no purpose anymore.
Isn't the same true of men?
Two incomes are not an absolute necessity. I know because I have raised a family on a single income and no we do not live in a ghetto or trailer park.
Agreed. I would love to be a stay at home wife but the economy is so bad I have no choice but to work.
We were not encouraged to work, we were forced. From the start, I mourned having had to pay others to raise my daughter so I could work. I missed so much of her childhood. The result is that my daughter does not share the same values as either her father or me nor does she have any respect for or place any value on family. I’m supposed to be proud that she has a PhD, has presented her ideas around the world, and has a position at a prestigious college. Basically, she looks great on paper, but I would rather feel close to her as I did to my Mother and Grandmother. Forcing women to work, in my mind, undermined the family.
God I’m sorry for you. That’s pretty sad but unfortunately we live in times where we are forced to work as otherwise we can’t afford to live but you are right our values are all messed up now. I blame the governments endless campaigns of “get mothers back to work” nobody stopped to think of the babies.
@@amandarobinson2531 You make a very good point about families being dangerous. But I would rather live in dangerous freedom than with the expectation that I should not be a domestic woman in case I might have to escape the man I fell in love with. "Safety first" just never registers with me, even though it does for the majority of women out there. That is why socialism is rampant, it promises safety over the uncertainties of capitalism. However, in my case, marriage just happens to be a much more safe situation because I would be a sex worker if I were not with my husband, I love the art of sex and that is what I would want to do for money. Being married means I get it on average about twice a day and I do not have to worry about being a victim of foul play, and I can be moral at the same time by treating my body like an Image of God. How many women are like me, who are saved from a dangerous lifestyle by marriage? I am only now pondering this with your statement! Also, being his kept woman means I have leisure time to pursue my studies and my hobby. I am very lucky to have found the man of any woman's dreams, however, and I acknowledge that.
That’s EXACTLY why they pushed it. To destroy the family.
How were you forced? 🤔I was a single mom so I had no option but how is a married women with a husband forced to work full time
Sad facts. 😔
Hope you're able to reconnect. ✌️
While in general I agree with you, I think you do need to take into account that there was a real problem that was addressed by feminism. Prior to the industrial revolution work was centered much more around the home and everyone had a part in the economy. With the industrial revolution, most meaningful work is taken away and is now done offsite. What was left to many women, especially middle-class and upper middle-class women, was a sense of being useless, because of not participating in the general economy. It was even considered a status symbol to have a wife who didn’t have to do any work. The suburbs exacerbated this by isolating women. It is very difficult, and not historically common, to be the only one taking care of children all day, isolated from other adults. So I believe it is a much more complex problem, tied in with things like the collapse of the extended family, excessive mobility and isolation, and the take over of economic participation by the factory and the office. I do see young women today trying to find a better balance, but our societal set up does not make it easy.
Along with the absence of God in life and the glorification of immorality.
I agree with you. I also think there is a middle ground between "no birth control" and "women must work like men!" I am so glad I didn't spend my life pregnant. Dr. Morse had trouble conceiving, but I didn't. I would be pregnant my entire life. I love my kids, and would have had one more if it weren't for health insurance issues, but I hate being pregnant.
@@carolynngockel3670 why would you spend your whole life being pregnant? While having a big family is rewarding, the Church does allow Natural Family Planning to be used to regulate births due to health and other reasons. It works well, I can say, from experience. When the majority of mothers stayed home to care for their families, children had more contentment and safety in their early years. They didn’t need to be hustled to daycare, or become latchkey children as they got older. There were far less childhood mental health problems, alcohol or drug use, because moms were the usual caretakers of families and the children were supervised. When necessary, grandma or other close family could watch the kids (I was a young widow.)
That is still the case now, women are doing all the useless jobs that have been created purely to employ them.
@@patriciapetrino4915 I know birth control wouldn't work for us because I get pregnant really easily. It's genetic--probably on both my side and my husbands'. I was way outside the "fertility window" of natural family planning when my son was conceived. We were married and wanted kids so it was a happy event, but it still made me realize "natural" planning wouldn't work for us. My daughter was conceived on first try when I was 38.
I was born in 1952 and I went to Catholic school and started at a Catholic College. My parents had a highly contentious marriage. My mother worked because she did not want to be home and she competed with my dad. The sexual revolution hit our Catholic School hard and it was very difficult to date decent people. Dr Morse is so right that there was no guarantee that just because one had pronounced vows and even married in the church that you wouldn't be a single mother with an absentee father. Many of my friends were divorced. My family ran a business and I worked with them and saw the number of people come through who were divorced, especially due to exciting opportunities that lay outside the marriage covenant.
With those factors marriage was not on my radar until much later.
As the daughter of a rabid feminist it took several long years to divest my attitude and heart of the philosophy that " a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle". This indoctrination isn't completely gone, but it has been severely curtailed for which I am much happier and at peace.
Thank you Dr Morse for speaking this truth in plain language that will hopefully resonate in many wounded hearts.
I wonder how many people actually get married anymore or do they just have casual sex and live on their own.
I’ve noticed rap😳 and grooming gangs etc increasing rapidly, also lonely men who can’t find any woman to love them go crazy and kill in schools etc etc and kill themselves, because life has no purpose anymore.
@@martinmartin1363 I'm 27 and got married to my wife last year. We met at a Bible study. Good young people are still out there, they aren't screaming on social media like the degenerates of this generation (if the good ones are on social media at all).
@@pellabandgeek
Fantastic maybe there’s hope for mankind, the family and God
God bless
@@martinmartin1363 There's always hope, but it has nothing to do with me ;)
This woman spoke to my heart! That whole part about having to work because deep down you dont trust your husband to be loyal to you and your children....I have never felt more insecure and vulnerable than when I became a stay at home mom, which is sad. But my husband and I have struggled together and what we have we have together, it has brought us closer and cemented our family together.
@Napucana Uličarka Don't they?
The way Matt talks about his wife 🥺💓
Years ago in this country (NZ) married men were paid more than women and single men because it was accepted that a married man should provide for his wife and family. But the feminists all called foul, and demanded equal pay for equal work. This was largely achieved, and we soon found that it took two wages to provide for a family, and it was necessary for women to go to work. The solution was have less or no Children. In famlies with several children where the man was the sole bread winner there were soon difficulties ( lack of income ). Answer provide state run child care centres ( keep those women taxpayers working). All this has resulted in children deprived of their mothers love and education and a diminishment of the family unit.
Add the points you make and we end up in the materialistic selfish world we have today with a declining population.
Somehow I'm a Millenial Stay at home mother with a nice warm home and 4 children, 1 income.... My dad was 48 when I was born so I was raised more traditional than most of my peers... NZ has become a cringe woke feminist hell hole. My grandmother, my dad's mother was part of that movement, she abandoned her 6 kids to be a Career Woman. A Journalist for a Woman's magazine.
@Lu Hi Lu. I agree that gutless men are a big part of the problem. In NZ a child benifit is paid to the mothers, so that usless husbands cant get their hands on it. Sadly it is true that abuse occours. Back in the 1950s the men where I come from ( rural NZ ) generally treated women with respect, and I remember the old men lifting their hats when meeting or speaking to a woman.Times have changed! Unfortunatly with the event of the 'pill'. Attitudes and the behavour of both men and women changed for the worse.Back then devorce was extremly rare.
I was a stay at home mom, until my husband had an accident which made him incapable of working. If a woman has no studies and something like this happens what else is left for her to do? Supporting a large family by herself with a McDonald's job?
I've wondered about that too.
Many men change careers in their 30's or 40's these days; often there is a way for a woman in such a situation to train later in life if she needs to enter the workforce.
Then patriarchy will tell her it's her fault for being "lazy" and staying at home! A woman's place is in the wrong. This guy gets a stepford wife to home-school his kid for free while putting his (no doubt female) kids off university so they can be helpless dependents too. Shameless male dominance.
I don't think there's any preparing for that other than actually planning for in case something tragic happened. If you're not a believer in Jesus then yes this a question for some and an answer to go out there and grind as much as the husband.
@@JustBree716God also gave us brains capable of preparing. Yes we are to trust him, and we also need to prepare.
I've been waiting for this. Finally someone's talking about the lie women were told AND had forced on them. Thank you.
I agree.
Women were not forced to go to work. Do you have any explanation behind that claim?
People have been talking about it for years
👏 👏 👏
3 J.C.s in this thread. 😂😭
@@jacksoncowsert6964 Who taught you what's expected of you in life, primarily? Your Father or culture/public education?
No education is "forced" on us, per se, but that depends on the role of parents teaching their children who/ what to listen to.
I am so frustrated with having been told my entire life (including now as a stay at home mom) that I was to get a job and that marriage and child rearing were secondary. From the age of 4 I was pushed towards going to college. My dad expected me to go to school longer than him, meaning I was to get a doctorate. But school is not like it used to be. Finding a job is not like my grandpa remembers it being when he was younger. I struggled for years and finally found a great guy when I was 27. We now have 5 kids and he is supporting us. But I will be honest in that there is a fear at the back of my mind of what would happen if he left, or if God takes him. I have a bachelor's degree but I also homeschool and care for 5 kids, and I have not worked in over 12 years. Its a sad reality that we have to face. I have so many friends who have husbands who suddenly changed and they ended up screwed. Heck, my mom went through that in the 1990s when I was a kid and my dad left (and didn't pay child support). She pulled herself up but it was a lot of hard years and a lot of poverty. My heart breaks for the younger generations who really don't know the benefits of waiting to have sex and fulfilling the roles of men and women.
I grew up in the 80's and 90's. There was definitely that mentality that you got an education in case some day your husband wasn't there to take care of you and you needed your own career. She hit the nail on the head with that insight. Because once you have that income and adjust your life to that, it's very hard to change.
Same way my mom raised me. She said if you want to be a stay at home mom go for it but make sure you have a skill in case something happens to your husband. I am now passing that on to my daughter.
This is how my dad raise me as well
This is how I was raised.
I’ve gone back and forth between home making and part time work. Being flexible was my greatest asset.
Some points in my marriage I had to stay home. I had babies close in age and it made little sense for me to work.
As my kids got older, my need to stay home was less necessary and having a financial cushion was more important.
Tbh that's a good way to be raised
The professor in college who was nastiest to me when I said I was going to be a stay at home mom was a woman who has had a career. "Well, I hope your husband can support you to the standard you want." As if I was gonna stay home all day and eat bon bons...
The most supportive professor was the somewhat liberal guy from California who was really enthusiastic about Joseph Campbell and universal myth. He actually said (sincerely), "Good for you. That's really important work."
So. Figure that one out.
Such a great topic and discussion. When I had our first kid I was on the fence about staying home. I really wanted to but I wasn’t sure how it would work, but when I looked into daycare I realized that I would spend the majority of my paycheck paying somebody to do something that I really wanted to do myself! Three kids later I couldn’t be happier to be a homemaker and homeschooler. I feel like we have control over our family in the way you don’t when multiple jobs and schools dictate your family’s schedule.
I totally relate and can testify to this - the kind of pressure I've been through.
I realized this problem with women being pushed to work when I was around 19y during my BSc in Human Resources. It just felt wrong. I was a young (?) mother by then (by choice) and somehow it didn't feel right to give my baby for someone to take care of. Moreover, I didn't need to.
So I was in and out of "light" jobs, like part-time jobs, until we decided that that wasn't the way...
From the outside the pressure was high. In the inside, sometimes, the money was low - Society just adapted to 2 incomes and it's very hard now to go with just one provider at home.
Nonetheless, I (we) felt deep in the heart that that was God's will for our children and none of us regret that 16y later.
I still have part-time jobs when they happen (or are needed) - working from home or something similar - and engage in projects with friends and/or community.
Around 6y ago I read in a founding document from a preschool: "Childcare instituitons were created due to the entering of women on labour market and the consequent need for instituitons to care their children" - It sounded so sad... And just made me certain that I was doing the right thing.
This is a Portuguese testimony, btw :) I hope to share that even with Oceans betweens us, we are all together in this.
God bless you all and give stenght to follow his ways.
Eu tmb sou portuguesa! Estou a tirar uma licenciatura em enfermagem, mas honestamente não pretendo exercer para sempre. Sempre tive a ideia de que precisava de ir para a faculdade para poder ser alguém na vida e basicamente o período escolar obrigatório foi sempre sobre tirar boas notas e ter média para conseguir entrar na faculdade, mas sinceramente estava um pouco desanimada e já só queria parar de estudar e construir uma vida. Mas depois acabei por entrar em enfermagem e estou realmente a adorar, é uma profissão lindíssima, mas sei que é difícil e que viver por turnos vai ser complicado quando tiver filhos, portanto pretendo deixar de exercer quando eles nascerem e fazer homeschooling com eles porque eu tmb adoro ensinar. Contudo para isto era preciso que eu encontrasse alguém que me apoiasse financeira e emocionalmente... Como ainda não conheci ninguém com quem me vejo a ter um futuro só me resta ir fazendo a vida por mim própria enquanto procuro.
I don't feel right about daycare either, there is something depressing about it. I just think a mother would miss so much in the early years. I worked at one for a while and a baby took her first steps there; the mother missed it. I do feel like it is a factor that pulls apart the nuclear family. It's sad to think of institutions raising children during the day instead of mothers.
I'm glad Dr. Morse pointed to the complexity of this issue - especially around the impact of divorce and the fear of abandonment. It's not as straightforward as "I need to work in order to maintain a comfortable lifestyle"
I feel I need this woman's book 💯❤️
As a woman, I'm not going to say that I was forced into the workforce so much as I really wanted to be a part of it. I grew up with a lifelong passion for Science and agriculture. So I went off to college after graduating high school, majored in science and now I have a very rewarding career as a full-time laboratory technician working in things like genetics and ancestry. I don't have anything against women who prefer to be stay-at-home wives or mothers. But not every woman is destined to just stay home to cook and clean up after everybody. Being female doesn't mean having to be on house arrest, whether you're married or not married. With or without children. I find that I'm just as proud of the accomplishments I've made for myself over the years probably more than I would be just cleaning up after my husband. But that's just me. To each in their own!😊
Her :) I’m currently studying aviation mechanics. I’m going to be fixing planes. And I have experience as an automotive technician. I really love engineering. All my hobbies are sporty. I couldn’t imagine having to be stuck in the house because life or society makes me and frowns on what I do. I can’t change my personality and be stuck in the house sewing. But I’m not against stay at home wives/mothers. But if I stay at home just support my mechanical hobbies, because I can’t change all my colors for you. I’d rather be alone.
@@inmyexpression19 You truly could not have said all of that better. No woman deserves to be punished for winning at life as an adult. Your passion is a very big deal and is everything the world needs. So keep doing what you do. Go long and live proud! 🥂✨
This is something I knew in m heart to be true even when I was a little kid. When I entered the work force what I noticed more than anything was how angry the women I worked with were. As time went on I got different jobs but it was the same everywhere: Angry women. The over riding impression I got was that they were inwardly resentful at having to work.
I agree. Women are exhausted and guilt ridden...Ask any woman who works FT and is a single parent, if they are happy...and IF they are honest, many are not. 💔
This is easy for women in good marriages to say. I not only grew up watching my mother be abused. I work in elder care and know their secrets, I see a lot of abused wives still with their husbands who never left, and they tell us (the care workers) how horrible he was to them, and then say, "oh, a lot of men are like that..... Why don't you have a boyfriend/husband, dear?"😳 cuz after that story you told me, I TOTALLY want to go put my fate in another's hands. I will never be as trapped as my mother. NEVER.
Your going deeper into your own self bias. Just because it happened to your mother doesn't mean it's going to happen to you. There's always a risk involved in everything we do. Imagine if our ancestors didn't risk sailing into the oceans or stepping into new territory, we would never progress to what we are today. You are also talking as if husbands don't get abused, it's not a one way street. Women actually have the upper hand these days which is why 75-80% of divorces are initiated by women.
IMO getting a degree is a good choice for women in this generation. Although, some women like the Dr. in the video regret not starting a family when she could. The problem is that women have a biological clock that needs to be taken into account if they want to raise a family. So it's either career or family. Companies will value a person who could dedicated more of their time and focus so it's clear to who they will choose.
@@blackwater7183 Thank you so much for your comment! I feel at peace now and your information and opinion are really helpful ❤
We should fulfil the roles we are born to be. And I believe that if we put our lives in God’s hands, everything will eventually fall into place. The sorrow will be eased and the pain will be mitigated by Him.
@@blackwater7183I like how you start off saying “Just because it happened to your mother doesn’t mean it’s going to happen to you” then continue to say that she is at risk for being like women who regret not having children if she peruses a career over family.
You don’t get to dictate the risks people take.
@@jacksoncowsert6964 I am not dictating anything. I am only reiterating the message of the video and encouraging her to find her own way instead of commiting herself to 2nd hand experiences. My opinions are just that, opinions. In the end it's her choice how to live her life but it's also important for people to be open minded and look at things from a different perspective.
Sometimes we are too consumed by our own problems, biases and beliefs which makes people short sighted and fail to see the bigger picture. I value other's insight which is why I am offering mine. It only comes from good intentions.
@@ngocthieu5119 I'm glad that that somone found my comment helpful. Always do your best and God will do the rest.
I actually agree. As a woman raised during the "work revolution" I wish I had been encouraged to marry way earlier than I did. Being a housewife is NOT a bad thing.
So in order for you to make your own decisions, you need to be encouraged. Aren’t you an adult?
This is so true. We need moms at home. Thomas Jefferson was even against dad working outside the home!
To paraphrase G. K. Chesterton and others: Why would a woman want to become the servant of a boss rather than the queen of her own home.
I hear the fear of divorce, though, and it can be hard to find a spouse. I met my husband when I was 28, almost 29. I'm now 30 and expecting our first child.
I finally accepted I wanted to get married around 25, after 11 years of saying to myself I wouldn't because I didn't want to submit to a man like Scripture says. Now that I'm married to a man who truly loves me, I can see what those women in healthy marriages told me and other young women. When you have a good husband who loves you, just like Matt described with his wife, wifely submission isn't a suffocating or demeaning thing. It took me almost 4 years, however, to find a man I love and respect and am willing to surrender to like that.
Making a list of "deal makers" and "deal breakers" helped me know better what I was looking for, but ultimately it was with God's timing, I believe. If we had met earlier, I might not have been ready, and he certainly wouldn't have been. He will openly tell anyone that the months before meeting me he was transitioning out of Babylon and just starting to find God again and feeling the first pulls to the Catholic Church. If we had met earlier, who knows if I would have given him a chance. The timing was just right.
It's still hard, though, to be starting so late. We have friends only a few years older than we are with multiple kids, and I have to fight some envy and frustration with myself about it, thinking that could have been me. Thankfully I seem to have inherited my mom's genes, getting pregnant right after getting married. She married in her late 20s and still had 8 kids. We're hoping to be blessed like that, too.
I am a stay at home mother by choice also living in the Netherlands. I have a degree and was very sucessful...I left a very high level career at 35 to start a family. It did not seem right to me to hand in my baby to a creche..I have three kids now the youngest is 6. My kids still need me even though they are at school. Because I stayed at home my husband was able to pursue his career and has a very good income now. It was not easy though mainly because you are very isolated as a stay at home mum - there are very few in Holland! Most of the other mums I know all work..you are looked down on as stupid if you stay at home.. I believe if more mothers stayed at home - life would be much easier for families in general...the problem is all the kids are in after school care or with babysitters..so there are very few kids who can just play in the neighbour hood with out scheduling "playdates".... I believe that mothers would actually have more time if they stayed at home as if there are kids in the neighbour they natutally play together so then you don't have to worry about childcare arrangements and everyone helps each other out.... now everything is scheduled - so even as a stay at home mum you have to adjust to the schedule of the working mums for your kids to have someone to play with... I could go on.....this is a topic that is not spoken about enough..... I do believe everyone should have the right to education and work but there should be a choice to stay at home and you should not be stimatized by society if you decide to do so....no regrets on my side even though it has been hard at times..!
Thanks for sharing! I'm on the fence about when in my life i should have kids. Society acts like being a full time mom isn't important in a woman's life. I like being very academic and strategic and curious (all great traits that make a career life interesting) but I also want to have a traditional family with a man who can support me in raising children (which is hard to find income and personality wise) it seems like some sacrifice has to be made to put personal ambitions aside to make your family
Stay-at-home moms are often very isolated in the US, too. All the stay-at-home moms I know are lonely, overwhelmed and sometimes depressed. Playdates always need to be scheduled, and playdates also mean you're not getting anything else done. And unless you're in a big (expensive) city, you absolutely need a car to get anywhere, which means moms are driving their kids around until they're 16! Not healthy for moms who need support and kids who need age-appropriate independence. Looking for a solution.
Hello, from California! You put into words exactly my own experience! I’m a stay at home mom to four kids, the oldest is 8yo. It has been hard and lonely at times for me too! Thankfully I found a small group of moms even here in my expensive city (San Francisco) who felt the same as me wanting to stay home with their kids, and we had a small playgroup, otherwise I don’t know what I would have done in the early years. It has been a journey of growing closer to Jesus, depending on him, and seeing his constant faithfulness to me which has been more precious than anything. There is a scripture that says the Lord “gently leads those who have young”.
Well done for doing what you felt best for your family! I wish we could be neighbors :).
@@ozztam that's encouraging to hear! Especially for the city lol, I'm glad your group exists. God is definitely at work behind the scenes. (My sis used to live there now shes in vallejo). I was part of a mops group heres in socal b4 the pandemic. It's been so hard for little ones being so isolated....then trying to get back to "normal"
Excellent, Excellent, absolutely excellent!!!
Share this with as many young people as you can! 🙏
When I was very young (7 and below) my parents were faithful Catholics. But, my mother had a severe mental illness and my father eventually lost faith and "couldn't handle it anymore". My mother trusted that he wouldn't leave, because everyone assumed he would follow the Church teachings. Then, when I was 8, he left. She trusted him. The whole family did. So, as a young woman not yet married I am going to school. I witnessed deep trust on my mother's part (due to the faith) and a love that we all thought was true, yet he still left her and we grew up in a broken family. I need something to fall back on in case it ever happens. I am going to try to get a degree that will make enough money in the shortest period of time so I can have children and stay at home with them as quickly as possible. I cannot (and will not) risk having my children be subjected to what my siblings and I went through.
Learn something practical and useful; it doesn’t need to be a college degree. Work experience may actually be more valuable depending on the field you choose.
Great conversation. Also worthy of mention are:
-the breakdown of the family unit,
-the breakdown of community life (because women are the relational ones most often),
-how children suffer emotional neglect on the one hand and are not truly disciplined due to parental guilt on the other
-allowing strangers to educate and indoctrinate the next generation
-the constant guilt that mothers feel for wanting to be with their kids and also loving what they do
-so much more
And these observations are after 13 years of being a university professor and seeing the effects on faculty, staff, and students.
I so loved this interview. Sound advice and wish this would be talked about more often. Brilliant 🤩
I’m really enjoying these discussions. Excellent honest insight. It’s refreshing
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! For touching on this most important topic. My life would have turned out totally different if my father didn’t make my mom work just so we could have a huge house chock full of materialism. We were sent to a verbally, physically, and mentally abusive daycare, and my siblings and I developed PTSD from horrible abuse there, and being left alone home with TV all day during summers to raise us.
Another aspect of the question is that women today are completely devalued if they should choose to stay home with their children. They are constantly asked in social situations, "What do you do?" and if they say they are stay at home mothers, it becomes an unsaid stigma. It is as if they are illiterate or something. Women have been damaged severely by the culture that we now attend. And I fear there is no going back.
I wonder how many people actually get married anymore or do they just have casual sex and live on their own.
I’ve noticed rap😳 and grooming gangs etc increasing rapidly, also lonely men who can’t find any woman to love them go crazy and kill in schools etc etc and kill themselves, because life has no purpose anymore.
This is one of the stages of decline. Normalcy will one day return. But not without struggle.
Yes yes yes!! My story in a nutshell… I bought the lie that I should get a career so I can buy all the stuff for my kids… I was very ambitious in my 20s, thought I can have it all, career, kids, marriage, going into my 30s I began living my faith and had kids #3-7. I now have 7 kids at 42 yo but a HUGE mistake that has been so hard to repair was those early years when instead of supporting my husband’s ambitions to provide for our family, I stomped my feet like a spoiled brat and said, “me, me, me… help ME be “successful” “ at the cost of my husband advancing as a provider. Now, I wish I can stay home w my kids but make I 3x as much as my husband so it just hasn’t been realistic. I’m not saying that to brag. I have so much regret and just being honest, struggle w jealously toward women who chose to follow our Lords teaching and design to have mamas home w their kids and fathers primary providers. I bought the lie. It was not worth it.
It’s not too late to stay home with your children. You might have to sacrifice some worldly things at first in giving up your salary, but the reward will be priceless. Your husband thankfully has a job, and God will provide the rest, and a whole lot more of you trust in Him to. He always does. Something to think about. I say this not from a judgmental standpoint but from experience. I could have been making a six figure salary today, but I chose to stay home and raise my children instead, and homeschool them. God has provided a very comfortable and fulfilling life for my family, and most importantly a God centered life for our family in return, he’s blessed us with so much more than I could ever have imagined or asked for. I do not say this to brag, but to encourage you and other moms out there that faith can and does move mountains, when we trust God and His plan. All praise and thanks be to God❤️❤️❤️🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
@@thenarrowgate6883 Congratulations on having 7 kids! I think you are extremely blessed to have such a lovely family. Damn! I'm jealous.
Honey please don't complain for making money. Maybe your husband can stay home with the kids. It wouldn't kill him
I really felt this. I'm sitting here with tears rolling down my cheeks.
Thank you so much for saying this
This was wonderful to listen to, I'm 21, I'm finally leaving full time work which had my husband and I separated for over a year (we've seen eachother a grand total of 12 days since getting married) I'm elated to be going home, I'll still be working part time but hopefully children will come along soon
Genius! This woman is correct! Gods way IS ALWAYS BEST! It’s a shame that the generations after will suffer for this error
too true
This is ALL the Truth I wish the Whole world would take pause and Listen to! 🙏🏽♥️
What a fruitful conversation in just 12 minutes. Thanks for sharing this
Finally a woman who is willing to talk about this she is 100 percent right, I feel seen and heard by her.
It's funny that now in many places, a family cannot survive on a single wage alone, but must have both parents working in order to simply pay for bills.
I am 23 years old in this world saturated by 4th-wave feminist beliefs, and just a couple years ago I chose not to put myself in debt to go to art college to become a filmmaker. I knew that that career would take so long to build up, I would miss that window of being a young and healthy mother who could _play_ with my kids. And I have so much peace with that decision.
I’ll have half my life still to live when my kids are grown! If I want to pursue more schooling or a career then, I’ll do it then.
But pursuing a career that takes a decade or more to develop will take away my opportunity to be a mother. I’m _so glad_ I was raised right, to recognize that at my age, in this culture.
I agree and want to add that there are many women who are in their mid-30s struggling to get pregnant because they married later not out of choice. There are many women who would have happily married in their early-20s but didn't meet Mr. Right until later. Perhaps more of the onus needs to be on men to also be pursuing marriage at a young age. So much of the argument is that it's a woman's fault for focussing too much on a career but surely many women struggle to find "marriage-minded," men.
That is absolutely right. Also where are the good people? I know that they are available but it’s very hard to know because misrepresentation is also very easy today. Social skills have also gone downhill.
Thisssssss
Men cant pursue women at a younger age as a direct result of how women are. Women in their early 20s or late teens (18/19) are not willing to take the risk or wait for a guy who's early to mid 20s to get where they need to be career wise to be able to provide for a family, indeed for a man to provide for a family now, you need to be on at least 40k a year (in the north of england), basically you have to be middle class to support a household, and even then you wont have anything spare.
@@Durram258 Is that a direct result of "how women are," or the economic situation?
@@christineclancy8089 Both but primarily how women are now. They could still date and marry men who haven't yet reached their potential or peak and work with them to achieve that, but they aren't willing to. They only want the guys who have already succeeded so they have to face zero hardship in their lives.
Thank you SO MUCH for asking this question. Dr. Morse is spot-on in her answer! I was born in early 1950s and I earned a "PHT".
However, because I got sucked into the contraceptive mentality, we had our first child when I was 33 years old ("elderly primipara"). I wish I had started having children when we were first married, when I was younger and more energetic.
I am supremely grateful for a group of faithful Catholic families who showed me by their lives that God is real and helps those who call on Him for help in our family life. Without them, our marriage would not have survived. Both of us are grateful, after 44 years, that it has.
What's important for young men and women to be able to do is take care of themselves. All young people need to learn to cook and clean and manage their money. So, when a couple starts their lives together the husband doesn't think his wife is his mother. And the wife if she stays home to raise the family can do so with a management mindset. The roles of Mom and Dad are so maligned in society to a large degree that it can feel wrong to be a wife and Mom and we pout.
As a man in his early 30s, and who has almost no hope of getting married, I do hope younger generations will be wiser. Women did work in the past, but it was more of a "support role" rather than a full workload like the men of the household used to take: both extremes are myth, that of the merchant classes of the past centuries called "the angel of the fireplace" and that of our modern times which swung the other way around in which women are to sacrifice everything at the altar of their careeer and success.
💯 The "hearth angel" was the illegitimate child of Puritanism and Freudianism. Neither the hearth angel nor the careerist is a realistic ideal for women. Both are pathological works of fiction.
Why do you think you won’t get married, you’re young 😊
For a man it SHOULD be easier to get married at this age, because you are a better spouse when you are a better provider and you should be a better a provider when you are older. I am also on my early 30's, but I think there are still hope.
@@SKyrim190 it’s refreshing to hear this from guys. I’m a 32 year old woman and I’m anxious to get married but it’s tough because I haven’t met any good men in my area. The ones that are my age are already married with kids.
All well and good until she finds out her husband is cheating/leaving/abusive/about to sell the roof over her head/has the money for expensive lawyers and she has nothing. Awkward.
Matt I listened to the entire 2.5 hours of Dr. Morse on podcast in my car. I really enjoyed that you had her on. BIG issue I had - neither of you address the reason this happened - WWII. Women went into the workforce in droves because all the men were off at war. When the war ended many found they enjoyed working, the extra income it brought them, and the freedom to do something outside the house. They resented returning back to being a housewife after contributing in numerous ways to include building munitions, learning automobile repair, many of the top cryptographers (Agnes Meyer Driscoll and Genevieve Grotjan Feinstein) were women as well. Many women lost their husbands in the war and needed to work to make ends meet plus the balance to men to women. Each country fared differently, but in places like the Soviet Union, women vastly outnumbered men. In America had a balance of men and women, but life had changed dramatically. Yet you left this catalyst out completely!
I did noticed when she mentioned that due to circumstances it was okay for women work, such as kids being older, husband unable to work due to medical issues, etc..., your team seemed to try and cut her off (such as getting her a soda) and quickly switching topics. I heard what you did there - change the narrative. Not cool. I got the distinct impression you didn't like what she had to say and found a way quickly derail her.
This!!!...
Good feedback!
I have been both a stay at home mom and a single working mom. When I was a stay at home mom, I loved the kids being home in the summer because we had so many adventures and I had a better handle on what was going on in their lives. I had 6 children ages 1 year to 17 years old when I divorced my husband who had been beating on one of the boys. I did not have the time to know what was going on with my teen agers. Summer and after school hours were a worry because my pre-teen and young teen children were not being supervised. We still had adventures some good and some not so good. Thank heaven I had been able to lay a good foundation with the older children, who helped with the younger children, but I feel that I was a better mom and enjoyed it much more when I was a stay at home mom.
I wish i had a mom that was home when i was younger. My mother pretty much worked all the hours i was home except for weekends but then weekends were reserved for my parents to keep eachother company. I was raised by myself for most of my youth. I never really learned to be a nurturing parent.
This is reassuring,I have had such a strong conviction to homemaking and having work that priorities my home. Thankyou for sharing
I just saw your channel for the first time today; it came up in my recommend videos. I don't know why I've never seen it before, but I'm glad I did! Subscribed, of course 🙂
Thank you for this. I was raised by my father and being a mom was never really on my radar, since all I knew of one was what little I remembered. I excelled in school until college - it just wasn't in any way fulfilling. I got married and continued to work, still unhappy. I got pregnant with our first child and my whole world suddenly had meaning. The other side of the feminist revolution is that boys are being raised to be useless men. They feel no responsibility to their families - if they don't plan on providing for their families then they need to do 50% of the housework and child rearing. But these aren't fulfilling to them the way they are to women so they don't, causing resentment and often leading to divorce and perpetuating the feeling that we don't need them. I hate working when I could be home raising my children. My husband isn't a good homemaker and our children cry for ME, but if I don't work we can't eat. I am raising my girls to marry a godly man who wants his wife at home. I've worked hard at my career and guess what - I make only a few dollars more than the moms who are just getting back into working after 10-15 years at home.
This is so spot on!!!! Isn’t it crazy that it’s (life) is something so simple but it takes us our whole lives to figure this out? As a mom of four I’ve struggled so much with the thought of working vs. home making. I have always worked and so my husband and I are used to the routine-I came to the conclusion that I do like working (I work at a small private Christian school and I feel like my work is important) but it still sometimes breaks my heart to not be near my children and keep them at home. I trust though that God sees our struggle and understands.
My mother is hard working IT women (and leaved husband after numerous beatings), while dad is alcoholic low income electrician. After numerous beatings, she divorced and leaved house with kids (including me) for her own safety. How do you explain that? Womens and mens dependence on each other is a real nightmare.
So much wisdom here! As someone who Felt the necessity of getting the high degree ( PhD) and having a career, I can honestly say I did not find it very fulfilling, and school, with so many demands to produce and perform, was very anxiety provoking. And so many years of schooling delayed any attempts at having a child. It wasn't until our mid 30s that we tried and were unsuccessful and remained unsuccessful even after ivf. I do think women have been sold a bill of goods and I do think there are so many ripple effects, unfortunately. With two incomes in most families, prices for houses and other materialistic things have been driven up as people can afford more. It really actually takes two incomes now for many families. And, even if one enters their marriage thinking that theirs is forever, divorce statistics show us that it may not be the case. And so there is the pressure to be able to support yourself as a woman. She is so accurate in saying how everything is interwoven. I would like to turn back the clock. I was raised by two parents with a mother at home, walking home from school for a prepared lunch, having her there when I came home from school to report on my day whether happy or sad. I sometimes think my generation, born in 1960, was the last one to really experience the good life and perhaps life the way it was intended to be lived. Nevertheless, staying home and not being educated also would not suit a lot of women and so I think it goes back to the choice that we were told it was all about. But in the end it did not really feel like much choice. What was meant to be liberating, the line that you can be anything you want to be, really drove many of us on a path of high achievement and too many years of Education. I don't know what the answer is. I don't know if there really is an answer due to all the Ripple effects, economically, family stability, Etc. I do, however, I think that they are good questions to ask and important ones for young women, especially when considering what they want to do with their futures.
Thank you so much for the encouraging conversation. Raising godly children and investing time in molding them is the toughest job on the planet. Mothers have a higher calling to be present at home when the children need them.
This guy made me cry hearing how he spoke about his wife. Good, good man.
I am 63. I have known an talked to numerous women in abusive situations. I have nothing but gratitude for my education and steady job. I have nothing but gratitude for my parents who set aside money that I could graduate from college without student debt. I have nothing but gratitude for my parents and grandparents who encouragec me to excel in school so I can be accepted by a good university/college. The financial security of a steady job that my education enabled me to have has been a blessing.
Society has made it almost impossible for single income families. Most importantly, women, in my experience are treated differently and more negatively than men but mainly by other women. My experience of working in NSW Australia is that women working together is generally not a good mix with bitching and envy array.
Women can be incredibly nasty toward each other. I wonder it is so hard for us to get along
@@IONov990 Internalized self - hate is a possibility.
Single income went to the sideline when desires for stuff replaced the family.
I work in a group home supporting individuals with developmental disabilities. I work only with women and we all work together very well. Not all female-dominated workplaces have this issue. Please stop spreading that narrative.
I really don't want the woman that I marry to have to work.
Traditional values and traditional division of labor - such as ; men being breadwinner and women being home-makers was the best. Half our life is now passed figuring out what the hell to do. Thank you, Dr. Jennifer Morse - cant wait to read your book.
I've been saying this for so long. For soooooo long! All the points they hit were spot on!
Wow, this is so insightful. As a woman in her 30, this is a great help to straighten my priorities.9
This is an interesting position. I'm 19, and I am at a point in my life where I am over the shame I felt for not truly wanting to take an "ambitious" career pathway. I always convinced myself that I wanted to do something "great," all while feeling deeply guilty for knowing I couldn't ever convince myself. So far, I want to become a special education teacher with a primary focus of raising my family and caring for my husband. I fear the idea of going into marriage and childbirth at age 20-22 because of my parents' case. My mom always wanted to become a mother, but due to a difficult childhood, she failed to really find herself before meeting my dad. My dad always wanted her to work, while she always wanted to stay at home. They wouldn't admit this to each other, and now this divide causes immense disrespect between them. As such, I am afraid that my spouse will abuse me if I choose to stay at home. I also tend to do better mentally when I'm occupied with a job. Teaching is a primarily female position because of our nurturing instinct. I feel most at peace with my decision right now, but I also hope that I will find a husband who truly embraces the natural roles of men and women within the family.
Jesus loves you💜czcams.com/video/AYxKRoONrfY/video.html💜
It is possible to find a husband who supports this, but is important that you talk about this a so many other important stuff to you and to him BEFORE you get married, honestly telling each other what you want in a marriage. This is how you avoid many problems later on in marriage.
This was so good, so true!!!!! ❤️ My father died suddenly when I was nine years old and I went into survival mode. I didn’t want to depend on anyone, so I always worked. . when I got married it was hard for me to rely on my husband because I was already in a certain mode and the Lord really humbled me and through His mercy and grace showed me how to depend on my husband… of course it took me being bedridden with a high risk pregnancy to be forced into that mode of things but I started to embrace it over time and because He’s so faithful and gentle and patient I was delivered from that oppressive mind set.
Thank you for this. It speaks to the heart
This woman is so right, and so many women will suffer when they realize that they waited too long, and we can't get the time back.
I had the privilege of staying at home with my children and homeschooling them, but I did this against my husbands will. He absolutely resented it. He always wanted me to go to work. As soon as my youngest graduated I have worked. My husband hasn’t worked for over 15 yrs. This video blessed me. Thank you. I do indeed think I did the right thing. Only 2 of my 4 children are Christian. But that is God’s job. Not mine. Also, I picked the father of my children poorly. Young women need to be taught how to select them.
She summed up exactly why I went back to work
I read this book two years ago and it was so great. It was so informative.
I grew up knowing my highest priority was being a wife and mother. I went to college on scholarship because I didn't want to have debt keep me from staying home. My husband left after 16 years of marriage and 8 kids. I'm glad I have a degree, but I also realize that I have received so many blessings from God because he truly cares for widows (or the modern day equivalent) and children. We shouldn't live our lives in fear of what might happen. Have faith, God holds you on the hollow of his hand.
Yes thank you for sharing what you went thru.
I was also in a 10 year marriage with 2 little ones when my husband ran off with his coworker .. and only until I was alone I realized I was in an abusive marriage (controlling, mentally, monetarily, and one time he punched me) thru the years I came to realize his girlfriend was a blessing after all. I owe her my wonderful life I have today!
Amen! 🙏🏾❤️ Thank you for sharing! 😌
Thank you for the encouragement. I am homeschooling our only child in a Christian coop and it's super $$$ but so worth it for the enrichment it gives our kid. I have a small remote job and a pt job near my home. We are going to be cutting it so close or even under water if the Lord of all creation doesnt provide. On one hand I'm scared but on the other hand excited to see what He has planned. Its definitely stepping out in faith. Health wise I'm not able to work at night (swing shift) so that's not an option but that would be my human solution to solve being short. 🕊
Being a wife should not be a priority, because i don't hear men say that thrir biggest priority is being a husband
Did he leave or die? Your verbiage is confusing
I agree, The worst advice I was ever given was to “have fun, sleep around, get a degree, stay single”. Why do so many relatives and ppl give that wrong and awful advice when you can easily have fun, get a degree all while being with the man you love, btw it’s more fun doing all of that in a relationship. Now men see us women as a night pleasure/ friend with benefits than gf or an wife. The men need to change their mentality in the way they view women, bc this is why us women keep working and going to school. The men aren’t being men!
It honestly starts with us women though. Men started seeing women as a "night pleasure, friend with benefits" because that's EXACTLY how women started behaving. I hear it all the time... the DoUbLe sTaNdArd of, if men can sleep around with no commitment, why can't we?... dumbest comment I've ever heard. If we as women waited for marriage and didn't sleep around, guess what?? Men WILL change their mentality in the way they view women. The power is in OUR hands ladies!
@@arreola891 I totally agree! The way men perceive us is a reflection of how we act. Feminism taught women that sleeping around was empowering. Women vilify men constantly. What man wants to be tied down to someone who will criticize and put him down? Men want to feel like protectors, providers. If we women can do everything for ourselves, and we have sex outside of marriage, where is the incentive for men to marry us?
Do you think men particularly respected or honoured their wives pre 1970?! You forget feminism happened because women were being treated like domestic drudges, confined to the home while men were allowed lives in the outside world. Such short memories in 2022!
@@LH-kr4od So you agree that women are better off sleeping around, getting limitless abortions, being single mothers, working more than spending time with children? Yay! Go feminism!🙄
@@LH-kr4od There ARE two sides...my Gramma didnt even know how to write a check when my Grampa passed. He treated her very well but she wanted to get a little job and instead he gave her a bun in the oven 🤔
Dr Morse is one of my favorite guests on this show.
Wowza, I just love her mind. Great interview.
It’s interesting I’m engaged in precana currently . And growing up my mother made it clear that children ruined your life and that men were not good ( turbulent upbringing and my father was not a proper father so my mother was the breadwinner etc ) so yes ! I definitely have been aware of “ always have your own money stashed “ if you have to leave him if he abuses you etc . I obviously chose more wisely I think when it comes to who I’m choosing to marry but yes initially thinking of not having my own income was uncomfortable but as I dive deeper into the faith etc I do not want to work I want to be able to be a wife and mother and my fiancé embraces the thought of me homeschooling and staying home .
He sounds like a good man
Sound like the man I am trying to build myself to be
I pray for your family and your relationships
As a former professor who was cancelled for being a conservative, I can absolutely confirm that everything you've heard about schools failing to teach in favor of radical Leftist indoctrination; hatred of straight, White men and conservatives, more generally; early, deliberate sexualization (including grooming kids to be homosexual, transgender, etc.), is all true. Frankly, sending kids to school, currently, is unthinkable . We've been homeschooling for years but tried sending our daughter to a Catholic school for 7th grade this year, but even that was awful - despite the priest and principal being wonderful. Our popular culture - the world - is destroying our children and society. Homeschooling is the only real answer at this point. ✌️
@@christophercormier8834 wow
What got you "cancelled"
Very good. It is all about God. Put Jesus first in your marriage always and everything falls into place.
Sara, God bless you and remember that God created marriage and the bible never says ANYWHERE that one gender is superior to the other. I am Catholic and the church teaches that marriage is a sacrament and the two people are "surrendering" to God first & then to each other...laying down their lives for each other, as Christ laid down His life for us. Tithing is also part of it and there are millions of testimonies of couples who pay God first & how they've never not been able to pay their bills. Please keep these things in mind...pray DAILY with your husband and ask the Lord to bless your marriage and dedicate it to Him. 🙏❤👍
I’m an african cradle Catholic. Practicing. I postponed marriage till I was ready. I eventually got married at 36. Had my daughter at 37. I’m doing all this while having a career, a great husband and a wonderful support system. African women have always been worker bees. Women work. Men work. It’s not a competition. We have always collaborated in our marriages. Of course there are exceptions. I think there’s something intrinsically wrong with what American women call FEMINISM. It’s the reason I’ve rested the word generally.
I think theres a difference though, between working for a corporation and doing work. What I mean is, just look at how a Godly woman is described in Proverbs 31, she is industrious, but theres no mention of her working for an employer.
THIS!!!.. THIS!!! AND THIS!!!.. women in Africa have always worked. This idea of stay at home woman has always been a western thing. So strange to me. Even though we participated in traditional wife roles. We still worked.
Who raises the children?
Who stays with the children tho? The dog?
@@jck6920 and @gogogolyra who feeds your children if you are a divorced or single parent? Don't reply with the advantages women get by divorcing, because not all divorcing women get them.
My parents brought me up to do good in school, college if I wanted, but absolutely will have a job especially after high school.
So I have always worked....I found out in my thirties that children would not be an option for me.
So I say to young women if having a family is truly what you want then make that decision with your spouse and be happy and proud with it. ❤
I found so much truth in this video and wish that young people would take this seriously
I don't think I was ever conditioned to want to work. I think my parents encouraged me in school because they realized that was the one thing that brought me joy. But they always reminded me that my ultimate goal was wife hood and motherhood. Hated them for that, because I was soooo good at school and had/have aspirations. I would be a terrible housewife. I'm nuts when my brain is not engaged in various complicated subjects. Maybe homeschooling kids would help me diversify my thoughts. But I'm pretty sure I would get bored with that rather quickly too. I think my mom did the best thing. She had kids young, then went back to school and the workforce. And by the time I was graduating high school, she was already at the top of her field. I should do that too.
This has also influenced what men expect of their dating prospects. I could not believe how the reason I could not find dates in my late 20s after graduating from college during the recession, the reason was because they didn’t want to date an unemployed woman who was living with her parents. What those men didn’t know was I had no debt and that I would go in to get a lucrative career. But ya that discrimination hurt and felt extremely bizarre. Indeed I remember one man eplixictly saying that I’d you live with parents and don’t work to not contact him. I did anyways, we really connected, but as skin as he found out my situation it was “adios”. Couldn’t believe it.
This issue is so complex. Our current culture of prioritizing women in the work force is damaging. On the other hand, an education and an income can be a form of security and independence for women facing unforseen circumstances in marriages (i.e., domestic abuse, divorce, absentee spouse, death of a spouse...). I can confess that being raised by divorced parents has shaped my views on the topic.
Thank you 💖
Great video
I really enjoy listening to Dr Morse and I agree with her completely. My mother was widowed at the age of 28 with three young children and had to work (she never remarried), and the experience of growing up in daycare led me to decide, long before I ever married, that I would raise my children at home, and I have never regretted that decision. I became a widow myself at the age of 43 and had 4 children, ages 5 to 15, and God provided for us beautifully and faithfully even though I never had a career.
God bless you and your beautiful family. What a beautiful testimony to trusting in God’s Providence…thank you and God bless you❤️🙏🏻
@@thenarrowgate6883 Thank you, and God bless you 🙏 ❤️
Great video!
This was so validating 👏👏👏. I saw how all of this played out in my parents' lives and our family (including divorce), and when I started having children of my own (late, after 2 degrees and 2 different careers, despite marrying fairly young but still buying into the ideology), I have felt stronger and stronger that the best path is me at home, homeschooling my kids, focusing on my relationships with them and my husband. I wish this was more feasible for all women but Dr. Morse is right about the challenges with having this be an option because of the other effects of the sexual revolution.
Always great topics. I was born in 1971 I didn’t burn my bra I only ever wanted to be a wife and mother. Now because of feminism I’ve had to work like dog and be a mom too. I had a child die while I was at work. I am also a mon to a special needs child who will be a forever child I always have to have child care for him. What a harsh life for the kids.I had 4 children an was forced into the work force because my then husband was addicted to pornography and I could not live w the health risk of his infidelity. I was ultimately abandoned by my exhusbsbd snd his so called Catholic family. The family court system no longer views cheating a problem and there is a whole movement of men’s or fathers rights they just want to take kids from the mother so they don’t have to pay child support. Look into the catastrophes of this new trend of female judges on destroying families. They should be forced to live out of a suitcase like they make children just try it a year.
The problems you discussed here go back a few generations, our culture is so different now , without going back to the way things were done in the family 100 yrs ago , i dont see a way to fix the dynamics in the family, my great grandparents came over from Italy , they were in arranged marriages, by their parents ,(that might sound horrible at first but now looking back has a middle aged man i see the logic , because lord knows when we're young we always pick the wrong partners, we dont know better and obviously parents don't want their kids marrying "losers" ) great grandfather was passed down his fathers trade and business (no need for college debt) great grandma never went to work , then even when their children got married (my grand parents) they stayed living with their parents till they had money to put down on a house and then when my great grandparents retired they lived with my grandparents they didn't get sent off to a old folks home . American culture has taught everyone to be very selfish. Me me me , I I I .
I used to say the same thing about the finances and bank accounts because I saw my mom get locked out of the shared account by my step father Time and time again. And she’d always have to come back to him (he was abusive) because she was stranded. So I thought I need a safe guard in case I ended up in a similar situation. But I have been very blessed very a transparent and loving husband who actually gives a lot of control of the accounts, and he trusts me so much. Truly blessed I didn’t end up with an abusive guy.
I’m a stay at home mother who chose the more traditional path. I stay home and he works. There is so much joy in this life and I won’t lie that it does take faith not to fear that one day my husband might trade me in for a younger model. I have to trust him. It is not always easy with todays dating apps and culture of infidelity. But I do trust him and we work on our marriage everyday. It’s scary and we’ve had our rough patches but as we have continued to choose each other we have found joy.
This is me as well. I am home with my four little children and my husband works and provides. When we first got married he wasn’t making very much money at all and I was strict with a budget as I stayed home with our new babies.
Now he earns quite a lot and he is at his peak in his looks and his income level. He could easily trade me in for a younger, more beautiful model. It is scary and it does take a lot of faith and trust.
But he tells me he loves me very much and he’s dedicated to our family and I love him and so I move forward with faith.
I would like to add to Dr Morse's answer about factors that discourage women from leaving their jobs. Historically, and even today in some countries including the western world, women who were uneducated and didn't have a career or own source of income were (and remain) vulnerable and at the mercy of men. We live in a broken world and men weren't always gracious towards women and didn't always treat their wives and daughters in a dignifying and honouring way. Many women had to endure abusive households (and still do today), whether it was their family home or spousal home. They couldn't escape because with no income they had no where to go and they would end up on the streets, placing them in even more vulnerable circumstances. Throw into the mix children, and these women were paralysed and couldn't escape the violence and abuse they were exposed to everyday. Look around the world and this is the reality of many women. I am christian, and I always encourage women to seek education and career. I discourage any woman from quitting work completely once married or after having children. I don't think it is of Wisdom to do so. The bible is full of stories of women who were vulnerable because they didn't have a father or husband to provide for them, and also women who were go getters and were productive citizens of their times, proverbs 31 certainly describes such a woman. Lastly it is a very complex topic and no earthly solution would resolve it, as long as men and women do not understand and live by Ephesians 5:24-33.
I wonder how many people actually get married anymore or do they just have casual sex and live on their own.
I’ve noticed rap😳 and grooming gangs etc increasing rapidly, also lonely men who can’t find any woman to love them go crazy and kill in schools etc etc and kill themselves, because life has no purpose anymore.
Good point. But this is the result of nations moving away from God.
If one doesn’t follow God’s principles, yeah, we are on free fall.
Ideally a spiritually healthy woman should be satisfied as a wife and homemaker, but every woman should improve their skills and ability to be self sufficient just as men. Truly no one is self sufficient, but learning to be a productive and responsible human being, whether man or woman, is a necessary part of spiritual development. Women who are merely stay at home wives/mothers are not necessarily living a more spiritual, God ordered life. Women depend on men, but they should not rely on them wholesale. So i think women should work with all their energy to be productive and responsible, able to take care of themselves, while maintaining their femininity in a way that would joyfully adopt a homemaker lifestyle in submission to her husband.
@@criticaloptimist7961
It’s a mans role to work to suffer and fight and die for his family, it’s a woman’s role to look after the children the home and educate the children in the Catholic faith.
The gentleman is no more the family is no more , the ladies before gentlemen etc ,and good manners is no more etc .
A woman could get married have a family life and when the kids have left home, then why not pursue a career .
No marriage means more and more disillusioned men and women committing suicide and murder because their lives have no meaning
This is exactly what Dr. J is addressing with the entire sexual revolution. It was easy to get it going with effeminate men (yes, being overly bearing and abusing is also effeminancy). Young ladies and young men should be taught wisdom BEFORE marriage and to never marry when there are red flags. A majority of young people ignore red flags with the blessing of their parents and get married to people who will make their lives a living hell. There are many dianamics to this. Education should either come before marriage or after children are grown. Careers for women should always come after children are grown, if that is God's will for the woman. Of course, this is how Christendom is built in a secular or pagan society. The more marriages fall apart, the stronger the secular world becomes. The root of which is always materialism and hedonism.
Yes!! Thank you for this encouragement and for speaking about the elephant in the room!! It is nice to hear my experience validated. I thank God for my wonderful husband who works hard to provide for our family. But honestly I will say that even as a stay at home mom, true fulfillment and contentment in life comes from a relationship with the Lord Jesus. Experiencing the Lord’s constant provision for our family’s needs is what makes life so much more meaningful, and peaceful, knowing we have a Heavenly Father who cares for us. He cares for you, too! Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight! Hallelujah!!!
I stayed home as much as I could. I worked little part time jobs until I had to work full time. I was definitely made to feel that not having a high paying career made me an immoral person. I was resented for wanting child support. If moms stayed home we could take a lot of stress of police. The old fashioned way was moms would be the eyes and ears of the neighborhood. Communities were connected. Now people are more concerned with affording a better car than the neighbors instead of creating a supportive and caring neighborhood. Children and household chores ARE work, but because there’s no official paystub involved people assume a stay at home mom is watching tv and eating bon bons all day which is definitely not what goes on for most stay at home moms. I appreciate this video. Mother’s matter because daycare is not going to love your kids the way a mom can.
I was born in 1953 too & know where she’s coming from. I was almost expected to apologize for wanting to be a mother & stay home to raise my own sweet child with my values & in the safety of our home. Later, as a man, he told me he was the man he is today because of the way I raised him. I couldn’t think of a more important life role than raising the future generation.
Marriage is never ending compromise. Also, each marriage is unique. It was never equal division of chores because we have different strengths. I cook, clean, and do most of our paperwork. My husband maintains our property and cars. We separate and joint bank accounts and have full disclosure on our spending.
Also what they say about marriage not being final is saddening. There is no divorce in the Philippines (where we were raised) so there is no turning back after marriage. Also, we receive counseling, budgeting, family planning and health seminars before we can apply for a marriage certificate. We also cannot get married without parental consent before the age of 25. Of course not having divorce is a double edge sword but personally, it has improved our marriage knowing from the start that we have to cooperate because there's no going out of it.
That is amazing. I like that structure by preparing u to be the best. Is this done by the church or the government? As a Pilipino woman did u ever feel pressured to be a career woman? or stay at home mom?
@@lilarose5512 it's mandated by the government. Does not matter what religion you belong to, one has to comply. Both my parents are entrepreneur and most of the women on my family are career oriented so I knew even as a young child that I like to have a career. My husband and I live in New Zealand where they are very supportive of families. Hence, once I get pregnant, I will be staying at home even if I have the bigger income now. My husband upskilled as a preparation to increase his own income since I need to stop working immediately right after birth. We do get financial aid here from thr NZ govt. Also maternity leave can be extended to a year.
@@maylynbayani Thats quite amazing. If I am not mistaken - the church is very involved in the government. this is a beautiful union btw government and church.
@@lilarose5512 there is separation of state and church but the Philippines is predominantly catholic. The other religious groups are still conservative in nature. After living in Australia and later in NZ, i have noticed that most people find agnotism as a virtue. Both my husband and I belong to the same church and actually met therr so more than anything, it was shared Christian values that allowed us to have a stable marriage. Divorce is also illegal in the Ph. I guess it is also a factor that we dated when we were on our mid 20s so we were a bit more mature in handling relationships. Prior to that both our parents discouraged getting into relationships before we could finish our studies.
@@maylynbayani thanks for the education.