Hey Maya, as someone with her own mental health issues my advice to you is to just take one day at a time. It's all any of us can do. If you keep trying, I think things will improve. It sounds clique to say, but never stop trying.. you can slow down, to take a break, catch your breath when things get to be too overwhelming but never stop. We all deserve to be respected, loved, heard and happy
"Aim for 100 but don't be upset when you're at 90..." that's a great way to approach. Give yourself grace. Have you ever had support from a peer in mental health (peer support specialist)?
@@MayaImaniAmani a peer support specialist is someone who works at a mental health facility or thru mental health services. They are someone who also has mental illness as well and they are there to support you and talk to you. I have one but she isn't my cup of tea but maybe if you look into it it'll work out for you.
Your not the only one who's gonna be schizophrenic for the rest of their life, I'm also schizophrenic, I'm 31, I was diagnosed at age 18, I have had 4 hospital stays over the years, and as I kept going back to the hospitals, I learned to connect with the people in there, my recent hospital stay was kinda awesome as I open up more and more with the people and staff...... so ya see, your not the only one who goes through the difficulty of schizophrenia, there is both a good side and bad side to everything love, and it's all about accepting that.
ty for sharing urself in the most vulnerable ways. i feel very depressed ,lost, i feel everything i do is pointless and meaningless even taking care of myself is so hard rn.. i stopped the medication bc i have so many side effects but i do really want to stay away from these meds i hate them . watching ur videos help me a looot to have a reason to keep living and breathimg no matter what tysm for making me feel less lonely pls keep being u world need ppl like u
Acceptance is the first and hardest step!!! 💜🙏🏽💜 I have BPD and never thought I'd find my way through the darkness, let alone out of it. When my mom passed in early 2018, everyone thought I would completely break. To be honest I was afraid I would too. I was able to hold myself together enough for my daughter. I really can't recall anything until the end of 2019, when I decided to cut out all external toxicity from my life. As the world seemed to crumble around me, I chose to finally put work into learning my worth. I refused to let my self doubt win anymore. By focusing on one step at a time, I found myself in a place I never thought I'd be!!! 💜🙏🏽💜
It’s other people’s judgement that causes all the problems in the world. If we learn to accept others for who they are (physically, mentally and emotionally) and love them without conditions everything will be just fine. But since people are critical and judgemental to themselves they can’t help but project that onto others and that is the main reason for so much of pain in the world. Accept yourself. Accept others. If you don’t accept yourself completely you can’t love yourself and if you can’t love yourself you cannot love others.
Maia, when I got diagnosed with schizoeffective at the start of 2020 during the pandemic I was completely lost and unsure if I'd survive myself. I recently lost housing for the second time due to the disorder, and had to move back with family which at first felt like a huge trap. Spent another 2 weeks in a psyche ward giving my phone number to random strangers and rubbing period blood on my face(which was great I'll admit very fun 2 weeks spent in a reality flux) For a long time I thought I'd be stuck at home, hidden away in my room alone with my delusions, to eventually succumb to more hospital stays and more pills and fewer and fewer friends. I felt like no person alive could relate to these issues. I felt so alone, starved for human interaction but then feeling like humans wouldn't like me. Felt like an alien. When I first found your video about smoking cannabis with schizophrenia, because that is one of the things that triggered my first psychosis, I was 90% catatonic. Couldn't speak, couldn't even remember my favorite songs and activities and even forgot precious memories and people, names and dates, art, recipes. I felt so alone until I found your channel. Please post as much as you want, never let the anxiety dictate what you want to do. I think 2022 is the year of many new subscribers, sponsorships, and support. You will never be alone in this. You're not annoying, you're not cringe, you're a Goddess enduring the side of the mind most men and women couldn't handle. We wait with baited breath to hear you, babe. You're a warrior of the Lilith moon, and you are deserving of these things the material world offers. That apartment? That's yours, you EARNED it. Your success? That's yours, you EARNED it. Friends that understand you and bounty of love? You DESERVE that. I think setting the goal to simply be happy is actually revolutionary. Sometimes it really is that simple and I'm trying everyday by setting smaller daily goals like brush teeth, eating one green veg a day, etc. I still consume alcohol and nicotine to cope, but that's changing because I want it to change. I think you have the power to manage this illness, and set the world on its axis. Also, you're only 26. You're a gorgeous young woman with pure truth behind those eyes, fire beams that emit radiant love - imploring this universe to understand you and I truly think it's time that they do. We love you. YOU. Thank you. - Celine
The fact that you want to go to college and got your GED speaks volumes about your mental state. Determination is not something a person has when they are depressed. Congratulation.
Maya - I have been following you since the beginning. We are so proud of you and your journey. Thank you for being transparent and sharing your experience.
You're strong! I had a really hard time with acceptance when I got diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder when I was 21. I went into full blown denial for 3 years until I had another psychotic/manic episode then reality struck. I withdrew myself from the world when I realized I've got this for life. I was so ashamed I cut contact with many people who saw me when I was sick and would just stay in my room alone.
So good to see you! I'm proud you've accepted that life won't ever be perfect. For any of us! Staying positive through the process is a feat in and of itself! Keep ignoring the negative thoughts by replacing every negative intrusive thought with just one positive one! Just like you did here in the video. You're not stupid or boring! You're transparent and real and it's refreshing to witness and engage! That's your power girl and I am glad to see you living your truth! 90% is just as good as 100%! Anything is better than giving up and giving in to the negative! All the best to you!
I salute you Imani! Your candor and acceptance of your life is beyond admirable. It looks like you've done a great deal of work. I'm proud of you. You're beautiful in every way. 💙
Happy 26 trips around the sun queen! You have grown and learned so much since your very first video and we are all so proud of you and the hard work you continue to do everyday. Therapy was and is probably one of the best things that have happened to me. Meds help to keep the voices and thoughts quiet, keep my heart calm, mind clear etc therapy helps me fight those voices and thoughts when they come. It helped me to re think how I view the things that have and will happen to me in this lifetime. Keep up the good work. Your diagnosis does not define you. The most we can do is try to manage our negative symptoms. Look for a way to empty that cup when it becomes too full. I find art soothes my soul from time to time when things get to be a lot. Continue to take control of your life and fall back on those who support you when you need it. You go girl.❤️
Imani I started watching you in 2017 after a depressive episode. In 2021, I had a mental breakdown, I stopped eating, and I didn’t leave my house for 6 months due to agoraphobia. PLEASE if you do nothing else, check your diet. Get rid of anything that has gluten, soy, or artificial sugar in it. All of these things activate our amygdala and cause us high levels of anxiety. I am slowly getting back into leaving my house again but it’s because I cleaned up my diet and started working out. The mind-gut connection is real.
Your videos have helped give me insight into how my grandmother must have felt. She suffered from psychosis and depression, possibly schizophrenia. I wish you well, and I really hope a new treatment comes along to help you.
I Just turned 26 too :) i honestly feel like were going through similar things in life, i also have agoraphobia cause of my anxiety and depression. And ive gotten to the point of acceptance as well, ill never be 100% i just have to learn to live with the mental illness i have. You are not alone in this, if you ever want to talk im here ❤❤ me n the rest of your subscribers will always be here to support you 😘 and you are an intelligent beautiful person! Dont let the voices tell you otherwise ❤
Hey young lady. Hang in there. I have heard low life people for 7 years now. Stay with real family members and real friends that career. Stay with God also. God Bless you. Always
I've never heard anyone talk about this before but I relate so much. I remember feeling hopeless for years after being diagnosed, because I knew personality disorders don't have a cure and I would never be a "normal" person, or live the life I always dreamed of. Eventually I came to the same realization, that'll just have to make the best of what I have. Along the years I learned some ways to manage my symptoms, and I do the best I can to feel as good as possible. I feel proud for doing the best I can :)
A lot of people come to accept that their lives will be "boring and normal". The problem is that society values greatness over competence without acknowledging that competence is a requirement for greatness. We have to win the everyday battles before we focus on other things
I have social anxiety, add, and clinical depression. I can relate to you in way 💜 I’m having a hard time making friends and getting a job and moving forward with my life .
I missed seeing u Maya c': Very cute hair. I've come to accept my chronic depression too in the last 4 years. Rn trying to get back to a managable place. And yeah.... we have no cures.... but yeah, best we can do is kinda cope with them. Really really glad to see u Maya
Shesss bacckkk! But I’m on the same acceptance journey I’m 30 and our chronic mental diseases don’t go away. We just got to learn to cope and move about our day. So good to see you tho.
Hey Maya, if it makes you feel any better I've recovered from all of my positive symptoms of schizophrenia (hearing voices, delusions, etc.), Besides the negative symptoms which I feel is basically similar to depression...I deal with mostly depression but I don't feel suicidal anymore like I used to. I developed mental illness when I was 22, I'm 30 now turning 31 soon. I went from being in the hospital multiple times a year, but now I've made it 4 years without hospitalization even tho I live alone and do everything alone. I feel like I'm too depressed to even want kids or a husband or boyfriend, so those aren't really my goals..but I have a pet that I adore that I want to continue to live for and it would also be nice to have a man just love me and be there for me. Someday. I'm glad you have a supportive family. I don't have any supportive family members, they're more dedicated to tearing me down than building me up. It made me light up when you said your dad researched your mental illness. My mom refused to do that. Your family really cares and I love that for you cuz it does make a difference. Stay strong Maya. Idk if I'll ever get to that 100% neither...because I still deal with depression, anehdonia, and lack of energy..but let's continue to fight for happiness and a better life together 🫂💜. Btw I'm down to only taking 2mg of haldol and that's it. Before I couldn't survive on a lower dose but now I have since November and I've been losing some weight since 4ever lol. Don't worry about sounding pessimistic, we all get that way especially after going thru something for years, it's not really pessimism, it's just trying to be realistic based on your own experiences. I've been watching you since 2017, I'm like wow she's really 26 now...I remember u were just in your early 20s...glad you're still here 💜
I’m glad to see a recent video from you. I’m rooting for you and it was nice to see that you are managing. Continue to share. Wishing you well. You are appreciated.
Hi Imani, I just wanted to let you know that I think your documentary of your illness as will as your progress has been helpful to a lot of people. I am a mental health therapist and I have shared your video with a family member who also has a diagnose for schizophrenia. Because she is young and a person of color, I wanted her to see that she is not alone. It is tough to want to get better and not knowing how to get there. I struggle with my own mental health issues at times; I think we all do, just to a different degree. One thing I know for sure, you have the power to help someone else who may be struggling. Your videos help those who are stigmatized in society. Your healing comes from helping those who are suffering.
I hope this video becomes popular. You are a reflection of myself. I hear myself when you speak and explain. I’ve never felt understood about my illness by anyone but I know that even though we don’t know each other, you, out of everyone, does understand. I think that’s one of the biggest aides to managing a mental illness is not feeling completely alone. Thank you for existing. This randomly popped up bc I’d occasionally watch your videos in the past. I’m glad to have reconnected. Thanks bye
I had a very similar acceptance recently Im just gonna try to take care of myself the best I can - foster good relationships w family & friends - avoid becoming homeless or going to jail or committing suicide Imma keep going to therapy & taking my mood stabilizers & anti depressants & try to laugh as much as possible for the rest of my days & not beat myself up when Im not happy Your videos are great please dont feel like ppl dont like them cause I do & I know many others do too I was happy to see you tell your voices “Im not stupid” during this video 😀 your definitely not stupid home girl Thats so fucked up you cant afford all you pills we really need free medical for all in this country I hope this new acceptance helps you feel a little more chill about life ❤️ best wishes
So happy you're back, :') your words mean so much to me. I'm struggling with bipolar, agoraphobia,and severe anxiety. I'm always hard on myself and expect myself to be perfect but it'll never happen. I'm learning to accept myself and live with them. I wish you the best and sending love & positivity your way ✨💖
Hey beautiful, praying for your peace ,happiness and hope your dreams come true .I hope you are doing fine and remember all dreams are valid💕 Your videos give me a better understanding of schizophrenia and helps me understand my cousin who suffers from it you genuinely help a lot of people please never forget that😇
Keep making videos!! So glad you’re back. I have BPD and I hear voices and so far it’s been okay but I know they’re gonna get negative again at some point. I guess we all just have to hang in there and do like you said and deal with the hand we’ve been dealt.
I like your videos because you are being so real about your mental illnesses, not pretending things are great when they are not. And you are not boring or too negative! You seem like an interesting and smart person to me.
i think you’re such a beautiful, genuine, interesting, cool and kind hearted warm person 🤍 seeing you grow all these past years has been pretty awesome. thank you for always sharing :) i am wishing you the best.
I really am glad I found you. In glad to know someone out there is thinking and experiencing this rollercoaster of life with mental illness. I'm so glad for these videos and you. Plz and thank you for just expressing yourself to us.
I’ve been watching you from the start of your CZcams journey. You are so smart, so well spoken and so beautiful. I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling a little defeated. I hope things look up for you soon. Stay positive gf you’ve got this 💜
Its so good to see you. I've followed you for a long time, because i think you are an awsome person. The way you explain your challenges, shows you as a very reflective, smart,empathic and kind person and i would be lucky and love to have you as a friend. I would have a 100% understanding for the not showing up or backing off some social event. I to struggle with mental health. I have depression and anxiety with a little dissociation on top. And i think you are so brave. You motivate me. I work on the acceptance my self and feel it helping to . And mindfullnes. Cried while watching this.(cry over any good and bad thing. You a good thing)Cause you`re awsome, and strong, and you motivate me. Youre beautiful Inside and out! Lots of hugs from Oslo, Norway! :D
Mayaaaaa I missed you boo!!! I’m just glad to see you and your growth. Keep living, keep pushing through. There are times were I want to just give up but then I see strong people like yourself. I may not know you but I genuinely love you and care of your well being. I’m glad to know that you will be back on CZcams. 😍🥰✨
Nobody is perfect, accepting and showing your true self is your Biggest strenght. You have what you need, and moore: supportive loving family, Beauty (rare), natural charisma (rare) + ability to be real.
hi ive watched a lot of videos to be inspired and motivated over all my years and nothing works cause of my negative symptoms and I watch this video and it made me happy, I swear I think exactly like how you are, I felt relieved. all I want in this life is to fix my mental I don't care about money or nothing like those things just to be cured. I hope and pray you get cured too cause you actually got me in an epiphany with this video. thank you
Nice to see You. You literally cross My mind from time to time. When you were saying I feel like people hate My videos & don't like you I immediately envisioned the Mr. James skits when he honks his horn saying WRONG, wrong, WRONG, wrong, WRONG....... Haahahahhahahahahhheehe
Jesus Christ of Nazareth is your cure he is a mighty healer and deliverer I have parranoid Scitzophrina I was diagnosed with scitzoeffective disorder I was healed from the sprit of depression and from suicidal thoughts by Jesus people I knew at the times to be Christians prayed for me A Pastor two of my sons pray for demons to leave me in Jesus Name and lots of demons did leave me in Jesus Name the spirit of depression did leave me for years and it felt amazing every thing then looked so beautifulout side like the sky and the trees fruits and vegetables even tasted nice to me when I never really liked fruits and vegetables. You are special in the eyes of God.
Create a habit of positive thinking and gratitude. Use things as reminders around your home or on your phone to remind you to think positive in that moment and list things that are good and that you are grateful for. No ones life is ever a100%. That is never the case, everyone has things that they have to work on for the rest of their life. Most ppl choose to ignore their issues but you don't and that's the only way you can move forward and improve. Everyday things get better and I think you've made amazing progress just look back at your old videos! Keep reminding yourself habitually of everything that is good and that you've achieved. This has helped me tremendously and I hope you give it a go :) Good to see that you're doing well! I wondered how you were doing a few days ago :) stay strong, stay healthy and have the best 2022!
Ive missed u ❤️❤️so happy u posted. I deal with Anxiety, Add, Adhd, and borderline personality disorder. With no meds taking it one step at a time. You got this. Anything is better than 0%
I missed you so much happy new year. Even the healthy people life are not perfect or 100% nonody is a robot where allowed to try and smile through hard times I also workout and listening to music. Try praying to God I know it's personal but it helps
I love watching your videos , and I love the growth I’ve watched over the years with you . Keep your head up maya .your matter to us and to the world. Your strength is admirable honestly ❤️🖤
Hey Maya, you can beat this. Remember me, my situation. But I’m here still fighting and doing better. I’m here for you. Make your mom proud. You are beautiful and smart just like her. I love you more than you can imagine.
Maya, It’s okay to grieve the person you want to be but can’t. It’s okay to grieve that future you wanted for yourself. Your videos aren’t boring. It’s so obvious how hard you are struggling against the pain. That takes an enormous amount of strength and determination. Try to forgive yourself. It sounds like you don’t even let yourself eat without feeling guilty. A living organism needs to consume energy to survive. There is no need to continue punishing yourself for existing. For having needs and fulfilling those needs. Try to forgive yourself. Extend empathy to yourself. You are so obviously hurting. Self-doubt and self-punishment will only worsen the torture. We hate ourselves for the circumstances we can’t control, like our neurochemistry or trauma, because jt is easier to try to hold ourselves accountable than holding a trial with the indifference chaos of the universe. No one deserves anything. We will have regrets no matter which choices we make. So why not be kind, especially to ourselves? It js already a difficult road, so why choose to walk on the thorns?
Welcome back Maya.. just want to say I'm glad to see you back. You are loved and you are missed. Hope you post more. Here's to giving you your flowers while you're here. 💐
So glad you’re back sweetheart, we’ve all missed you so much, and we’re all so proud of you. You may not realise it, but, you help so many people, you make others realise they’re not alone. Carry on just being you. Can’t wait for the next video, big love from the UK!! 😘
It’s so good to see another video of yours Maya. I’m really proud of the fact that you have chosen acceptance. In this life not everything can be 100%, but you take your power back when you understand that you’ll do your best with whatever you have. You’re in my prayers and this gauntlet called life is one that you will definitely get through. To stay positive maya, light a candle and speak positively over that candle and manifest what you want ok? Bring in those positive vibrations of peace, love and strength to conquer everything that feels scary. 💜💜💜
Your a blessing babe... as acceptance was the only way I get by now.. knowing I am just me is okay.. and that I don't need to be anything else... yes medication does help completely agree, I take pills when I need them and not so much the sleeping ones. Try to sleep naturally and burn my energy through the day with dance it's so true.. yes I battle with hallucinations but its horrible ay... x
Maya, I PRAY you read this message. One day God allowed me to feel what a person who suffers from Schizophrenia feels. I cried because I was shocked over the torment. Those are in deed spirits. NO, u don't have to live like that, for the rest of your life. The spirits are called radio active spirits. if you say this, both day and night: "I bind up all radio active spirits in Jesus name, and demand you go from now, in Jesus name!" you can in faith break the demons hold off of you. I'm praying for you. Please do this and anyone else who reads this who is experiencing symptoms involving schizophrenia.
these videos have been helping me since high school thru my issues with psychosis when ive had no one that seemed to get it, im glad to see you getting better even if we relate in the deepest of waters that is this chronic illness, i wish you the best :3
I was so happy when I got a notification that you posted a video! I'm also struggling with staying positive. What helps me is repeating phrases in my head (like: "this to shall pass" or "I've been through worse, I can handle this".
I'm glad you're okay. I can't imagine what it's like to deal with schizophrenia, but I can relate to anxiety and depression. I'm so proud that you're sharing your story.
Heyyyyyy! I hope that you’ll continue to post videos. I don’t suffer from mental health issues but I’ve learned a lot abt schizophrenia from watching your videos and I’m sure you inspire a lot of ppl who are managing their illness as well. The journey isn’t easy but it’s worth it. I don’t know what it’s like for you but when you stop speaking bc of the voices I feel so bad, I wish I could help. I pray that doctors find a cure I really do💜💜💜
Hey Maya first off its great to get a video from you and secondly when it comes to my depression I've honestly taken a lot of how to deal with it from watching your videos so thank you. On top of that I've learned for my self it is creating that helps me, I dive deep into my art's. With what ever your art or arts of choice may be I'd recommend that and let your self express purely what ever you are feeling. My dad would always say to me when I would get into a deep hold "The opposite of depression is expression." and that saying has truly helped me a lot. Thank you again for the video and I hope this helps.
You looking good 👍, I've learned that loving someone unconditionally is loving them for who they are not who you want them to be..... Facts the good, bad, the ugly...
Hey Maya, glad your doing ok. Anxiety seems impossible to overcome, it's so crippling at it's worst. I can totally agree that it's unlikely you'll be 100% confident and anxiety free, most people aren't I think, but you can get yourself to a place where you can at least expand the self imposed boundaries of your life and feel more fulfilled. After 20+ years of it it does naturally improve, but you're right, the likely hood of 100% confident version of myself seems pretty remote. It's not impossible but to be honest, I'm not sure if I even care about being that person anymore. Self acceptance, even of imperfections and things you want to change, seems key. Perfection is overrated. I think your videos hit at a time where the potential of CZcams as a communication tool was at it's peak, (kind of seems changed now, or I have), and your story, told by you, was the realest documentary you could ever watch. I've never seen it as moaning :)
Im so sorry for you..... It must be terrible hearing voice and hallucinating..... I have pretty bad anxiety and when i get in a slump i over think things and have constant thoughts and conversations in my head..... I don't hear voices, but the constant conversation and thoughts i have in my head are bad enough...... i couldnt imagine being able to handle hearing voices..... hope it gets better for you..
Happy 26 years of life, Maya.
The world still needs you, and your words. They are so important.
You have close to 30,000 friends. We all appreciate your videos, You have touched more lives than you could ever imagine!
Yes!!!! I am always rooting for her!! ❤️❤️
Hey Maya, as someone with her own mental health issues my advice to you is to just take one day at a time. It's all any of us can do. If you keep trying, I think things will improve. It sounds clique to say, but never stop trying.. you can slow down, to take a break, catch your breath when things get to be too overwhelming but never stop. We all deserve to be respected, loved, heard and happy
Your life matters. Your story matters. The world needs to hear your story. Thank you for posting
"Aim for 100 but don't be upset when you're at 90..." that's a great way to approach. Give yourself grace.
Have you ever had support from a peer in mental health (peer support specialist)?
I’m not sure what that is
@@MayaImaniAmani a peer support specialist is someone who works at a mental health facility or thru mental health services. They are someone who also has mental illness as well and they are there to support you and talk to you. I have one but she isn't my cup of tea but maybe if you look into it it'll work out for you.
Your not the only one who's gonna be schizophrenic for the rest of their life, I'm also schizophrenic, I'm 31, I was diagnosed at age 18, I have had 4 hospital stays over the years, and as I kept going back to the hospitals, I learned to connect with the people in there, my recent hospital stay was kinda awesome as I open up more and more with the people and staff...... so ya see, your not the only one who goes through the difficulty of schizophrenia, there is both a good side and bad side to everything love, and it's all about accepting that.
Im schizophrenic and I can't see the good side of it
ty for sharing urself in the most vulnerable ways. i feel very depressed ,lost, i feel everything i do is pointless and meaningless even taking care of myself is so hard rn.. i stopped the medication bc i have so many side effects but i do really want to stay away from these meds i hate them . watching ur videos help me a looot to have a reason to keep living and breathimg no matter what tysm for making me feel less lonely pls keep being u world need ppl like u
Acceptance is the first and hardest step!!! 💜🙏🏽💜
I have BPD and never thought I'd find my way through the darkness, let alone out of it. When my mom passed in early 2018, everyone thought I would completely break. To be honest I was afraid I would too. I was able to hold myself together enough for my daughter. I really can't recall anything until the end of 2019, when I decided to cut out all external toxicity from my life. As the world seemed to crumble around me, I chose to finally put work into learning my worth. I refused to let my self doubt win anymore. By focusing on one step at a time, I found myself in a place I never thought I'd be!!! 💜🙏🏽💜
It’s other people’s judgement that causes all the problems in the world. If we learn to accept others for who they are (physically, mentally and emotionally) and love them without conditions everything will be just fine. But since people are critical and judgemental to themselves they can’t help but project that onto others and that is the main reason for so much of pain in the world.
Accept yourself. Accept others. If you don’t accept yourself completely you can’t love yourself and if you can’t love yourself you cannot love others.
Maia,
when I got diagnosed with schizoeffective at the start of 2020 during the pandemic I was completely lost and unsure if I'd survive myself. I recently lost housing for the second time due to the disorder, and had to move back with family which at first felt like a huge trap. Spent another 2 weeks in a psyche ward giving my phone number to random strangers and rubbing period blood on my face(which was great I'll admit very fun 2 weeks spent in a reality flux) For a long time I thought I'd be stuck at home, hidden away in my room alone with my delusions, to eventually succumb to more hospital stays and more pills and fewer and fewer friends. I felt like no person alive could relate to these issues. I felt so alone, starved for human interaction but then feeling like humans wouldn't like me. Felt like an alien.
When I first found your video about smoking cannabis with schizophrenia, because that is one of the things that triggered my first psychosis, I was 90% catatonic. Couldn't speak, couldn't even remember my favorite songs and activities and even forgot precious memories and people, names and dates, art, recipes. I felt so alone until I found your channel. Please post as much as you want, never let the anxiety dictate what you want to do. I think 2022 is the year of many new subscribers, sponsorships, and support. You will never be alone in this. You're not annoying, you're not cringe, you're a Goddess enduring the side of the mind most men and women couldn't handle. We wait with baited breath to hear you, babe. You're a warrior of the Lilith moon, and you are deserving of these things the material world offers. That apartment? That's yours, you EARNED it. Your success? That's yours, you EARNED it. Friends that understand you and bounty of love? You DESERVE that. I think setting the goal to simply be happy is actually revolutionary. Sometimes it really is that simple and I'm trying everyday by setting smaller daily goals like brush teeth, eating one green veg a day, etc. I still consume alcohol and nicotine to cope, but that's changing because I want it to change. I think you have the power to manage this illness, and set the world on its axis. Also, you're only 26. You're a gorgeous young woman with pure truth behind those eyes, fire beams that emit radiant love - imploring this universe to understand you and I truly think it's time that they do.
We love you. YOU. Thank you.
- Celine
The fact that you want to go to college and got your GED speaks volumes about your mental state. Determination is not something a person has when they are depressed. Congratulation.
Maya - I have been following you since the beginning. We are so proud of you and your journey. Thank you for being transparent and sharing your experience.
You're strong!
I had a really hard time with acceptance when I got diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder when I was 21. I went into full blown denial for 3 years until I had another psychotic/manic episode then reality struck. I withdrew myself from the world when I realized I've got this for life. I was so ashamed I cut contact with many people who saw me when I was sick and would just stay in my room alone.
So good to see you! I'm proud you've accepted that life won't ever be perfect. For any of us! Staying positive through the process is a feat in and of itself! Keep ignoring the negative thoughts by replacing every negative intrusive thought with just one positive one! Just like you did here in the video. You're not stupid or boring! You're transparent and real and it's refreshing to witness and engage! That's your power girl and I am glad to see you living your truth! 90% is just as good as 100%! Anything is better than giving up and giving in to the negative!
All the best to you!
I salute you Imani! Your candor and acceptance of your life is beyond admirable. It looks like you've done a great deal of work. I'm proud of you. You're beautiful in every way. 💙
Happy 26 trips around the sun queen! You have grown and learned so much since your very first video and we are all so proud of you and the hard work you continue to do everyday. Therapy was and is probably one of the best things that have happened to me. Meds help to keep the voices and thoughts quiet, keep my heart calm, mind clear etc therapy helps me fight those voices and thoughts when they come. It helped me to re think how I view the things that have and will happen to me in this lifetime.
Keep up the good work. Your diagnosis does not define you. The most we can do is try to manage our negative symptoms. Look for a way to empty that cup when it becomes too full. I find art soothes my soul from time to time when things get to be a lot. Continue to take control of your life and fall back on those who support you when you need it. You go girl.❤️
Imani I started watching you in 2017 after a depressive episode. In 2021, I had a mental breakdown, I stopped eating, and I didn’t leave my house for 6 months due to agoraphobia. PLEASE if you do nothing else, check your diet. Get rid of anything that has gluten, soy, or artificial sugar in it. All of these things activate our amygdala and cause us high levels of anxiety. I am slowly getting back into leaving my house again but it’s because I cleaned up my diet and started working out. The mind-gut connection is real.
Your videos have helped give me insight into how my grandmother must have felt. She suffered from psychosis and depression, possibly schizophrenia. I wish you well, and I really hope a new treatment comes along to help you.
I was just thinking about you , I’m so glad that you are okay . I want you to know that I’m so proud of you and your story encourages me
I Just turned 26 too :) i honestly feel like were going through similar things in life, i also have agoraphobia cause of my anxiety and depression. And ive gotten to the point of acceptance as well, ill never be 100% i just have to learn to live with the mental illness i have. You are not alone in this, if you ever want to talk im here ❤❤ me n the rest of your subscribers will always be here to support you 😘 and you are an intelligent beautiful person! Dont let the voices tell you otherwise ❤
Hey young lady. Hang in there. I have heard low life people for 7 years now.
Stay with real family members and real friends that career. Stay with God also. God Bless you. Always
I've never heard anyone talk about this before but I relate so much. I remember feeling hopeless for years after being diagnosed, because I knew personality disorders don't have a cure and I would never be a "normal" person, or live the life I always dreamed of. Eventually I came to the same realization, that'll just have to make the best of what I have. Along the years I learned some ways to manage my symptoms, and I do the best I can to feel as good as possible. I feel proud for doing the best I can :)
A lot of people come to accept that their lives will be "boring and normal". The problem is that society values greatness over competence without acknowledging that competence is a requirement for greatness. We have to win the everyday battles before we focus on other things
I have social anxiety, add, and clinical depression. I can relate to you in way 💜 I’m having a hard time making friends and getting a job and moving forward with my life .
I missed seeing u Maya c': Very cute hair.
I've come to accept my chronic depression too in the last 4 years. Rn trying to get back to a managable place. And yeah.... we have no cures.... but yeah, best we can do is kinda cope with them. Really really glad to see u Maya
Shesss bacckkk! But I’m on the same acceptance journey I’m 30 and our chronic mental diseases don’t go away. We just got to learn to cope and move about our day. So good to see you tho.
Hey Maya, if it makes you feel any better I've recovered from all of my positive symptoms of schizophrenia (hearing voices, delusions, etc.), Besides the negative symptoms which I feel is basically similar to depression...I deal with mostly depression but I don't feel suicidal anymore like I used to. I developed mental illness when I was 22, I'm 30 now turning 31 soon. I went from being in the hospital multiple times a year, but now I've made it 4 years without hospitalization even tho I live alone and do everything alone.
I feel like I'm too depressed to even want kids or a husband or boyfriend, so those aren't really my goals..but I have a pet that I adore that I want to continue to live for and it would also be nice to have a man just love me and be there for me. Someday.
I'm glad you have a supportive family. I don't have any supportive family members, they're more dedicated to tearing me down than building me up. It made me light up when you said your dad researched your mental illness. My mom refused to do that. Your family really cares and I love that for you cuz it does make a difference.
Stay strong Maya. Idk if I'll ever get to that 100% neither...because I still deal with depression, anehdonia, and lack of energy..but let's continue to fight for happiness and a better life together 🫂💜.
Btw I'm down to only taking 2mg of haldol and that's it. Before I couldn't survive on a lower dose but now I have since November and I've been losing some weight since 4ever lol. Don't worry about sounding pessimistic, we all get that way especially after going thru something for years, it's not really pessimism, it's just trying to be realistic based on your own experiences.
I've been watching you since 2017, I'm like wow she's really 26 now...I remember u were just in your early 20s...glad you're still here 💜
It’s so good to see your face and I hope your well 🙌🏽🥰🙏🏾
Come back soon and play your guitar for us all....U look great, Happy to see you....Praying you have Brighter Days....
You are loved, you are important, don't you ever forget that.💜
Thank you, I really needed to hear that ❤️
I’m glad to see a recent video from you. I’m rooting for you and it was nice to see that you are managing. Continue to share. Wishing you well. You are appreciated.
Hi Imani, I just wanted to let you know that I think your documentary of your illness as will as your progress has been helpful to a lot of people. I am a mental health therapist and I have shared your video with a family member who also has a diagnose for schizophrenia. Because she is young and a person of color, I wanted her to see that she is not alone. It is tough to want to get better and not knowing how to get there. I struggle with my own mental health issues at times; I think we all do, just to a different degree. One thing I know for sure, you have the power to help someone else who may be struggling. Your videos help those who are stigmatized in society. Your healing comes from helping those who are suffering.
I hope this video becomes popular. You are a reflection of myself. I hear myself when you speak and explain. I’ve never felt understood about my illness by anyone but I know that even though we don’t know each other, you, out of everyone, does understand. I think that’s one of the biggest aides to managing a mental illness is not feeling completely alone. Thank you for existing. This randomly popped up bc I’d occasionally watch your videos in the past. I’m glad to have reconnected. Thanks bye
Outwardly you look healthy , remember this too will pass.
You are beautiful ,very intelligent. I send a bundle of hugs.You are gifted you give to us everything you speak making videos 😊
My 17 year old daughter has schizophrenia. I happened to cross your video while she was being diagnosed and have been following you ever since.
Thank you for sharing your story it gives me hope that everything will be ok !! A loved one in my life has recently been diagnosed.
No worries! Just stand by them.
I had a very similar acceptance recently
Im just gonna try to take care of myself the best I can - foster good relationships w family & friends - avoid becoming homeless or going to jail or committing suicide
Imma keep going to therapy & taking my mood stabilizers & anti depressants & try to laugh as much as possible for the rest of my days & not beat myself up when Im not happy
Your videos are great please dont feel like ppl dont like them cause I do & I know many others do too
I was happy to see you tell your voices “Im not stupid” during this video 😀 your definitely not stupid home girl
Thats so fucked up you cant afford all you pills we really need free medical for all in this country
I hope this new acceptance helps you feel a little more chill about life ❤️ best wishes
So happy you're back, :') your words mean so much to me. I'm struggling with bipolar, agoraphobia,and severe anxiety. I'm always hard on myself and expect myself to be perfect but it'll never happen. I'm learning to accept myself and live with them. I wish you the best and sending love & positivity your way ✨💖
Hey Maya! Happy Belated Birthday! Missed seeing your face. You are loved immensely. 💖💖
Hey beautiful, praying for your peace ,happiness and hope your dreams come true .I hope you are doing fine and remember all dreams are valid💕
Your videos give me a better understanding of schizophrenia and helps me understand my cousin who suffers from it you genuinely help a lot of people please never forget that😇
Imo, staying positive isn't about being happy all the time, it's knowing things will get better. Stay strong
When the world needed her most she vanished....
Glad you are back 🙂
Keep making videos!! So glad you’re back. I have BPD and I hear voices and so far it’s been okay but I know they’re gonna get negative again at some point. I guess we all just have to hang in there and do like you said and deal with the hand we’ve been dealt.
I like your videos because you are being so real about your mental illnesses, not pretending things are great when they are not. And you are not boring or too negative! You seem like an interesting and smart person to me.
i think you’re such a beautiful, genuine, interesting, cool and kind hearted warm person 🤍 seeing you grow all these past years has been pretty awesome. thank you for always sharing :) i am wishing you the best.
I think you’re a breath of fresh air. I have paranoid schizophrenia and I get it.
i’m so glad to hear how you’re doing. ur absolutely right about being okay with things not being 100. take care, Maya!
your'e so honest and raw! i've been following you for ages! much love
I really am glad I found you. In glad to know someone out there is thinking and experiencing this rollercoaster of life with mental illness. I'm so glad for these videos and you. Plz and thank you for just expressing yourself to us.
I’ve been watching you from the start of your CZcams journey. You are so smart, so well spoken and so beautiful. I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling a little defeated. I hope things look up for you soon. Stay positive gf you’ve got this 💜
Wow thanks ❤️
Thank you for making this video. I really appreciate your honesty and realness. Genuinely dude this has helped me.
Its so good to see you. I've followed you for a long time, because i think you are an awsome person. The way you explain your challenges, shows you as a very reflective, smart,empathic and kind person and i would be lucky and love to have you as a friend. I would have a 100% understanding for the not showing up or backing off some social event. I to struggle with mental health. I have depression and anxiety with a little dissociation on top. And i think you are so brave. You motivate me.
I work on the acceptance my self and feel it helping to . And mindfullnes.
Cried while watching this.(cry over any good and bad thing. You a good thing)Cause you`re awsome, and strong, and you motivate me.
Youre beautiful
Inside and out!
Lots of hugs from Oslo, Norway! :D
Mayaaaaa I missed you boo!!! I’m just glad to see you and your growth. Keep living, keep pushing through. There are times were I want to just give up but then I see strong people like yourself. I may not know you but I genuinely love you and care of your well being. I’m glad to know that you will be back on CZcams. 😍🥰✨
Nobody is perfect, accepting and showing your true self is your Biggest strenght. You have what you need, and moore: supportive loving family, Beauty (rare), natural charisma (rare) + ability to be real.
I’m so glad to to see and hear you today. You look well. I can see that the therapy and intensional living is working. Happy for you!!!!
I am so glad to see you Maya I was so worried about you!!!! Great big hugs! ❤
Thanks Jeffrey, you’re always so nice to me!!
@@MayaImaniAmani You are very welcome Maya! ❤🤗
I dont find your videos boring nor pessimistic :) They are very genuine and calming. You are a pretty cool person in my mind
Your not alone!
Girl you don’t want to be like other people you are YOU FOR A REASON and being YOU IS EXACTLY HOW YOU SHOULD BE🤍
Keep holding on mama🥰🙏🏾
I was thinking about you recently. I’m glad you’re back and plan to make more videos. All we can do is take it one step at a time. 😊
hi ive watched a lot of videos to be inspired and motivated over all my years and nothing works cause of my negative symptoms and I watch this video and it made me happy, I swear I think exactly like how you are, I felt relieved. all I want in this life is to fix my mental I don't care about money or nothing like those things just to be cured. I hope and pray you get cured too cause you actually got me in an epiphany with this video. thank you
Negative symptoms are hell
Nice to see You. You literally cross My mind from time to time. When you were saying I feel like people hate My videos & don't like you I immediately envisioned the Mr. James skits when he honks his horn saying WRONG, wrong, WRONG, wrong, WRONG....... Haahahahhahahahahhheehe
Jesus Christ of Nazareth is your cure he is a mighty healer and deliverer I have parranoid Scitzophrina I was diagnosed with scitzoeffective disorder I was healed from the sprit of depression and from suicidal thoughts by Jesus people I knew at the times to be Christians prayed for me A Pastor two of my sons pray for demons to leave me in Jesus Name and lots of demons did leave me in Jesus Name the spirit of depression did leave me for years and it felt amazing every thing then looked so beautifulout side like the sky and the trees fruits and vegetables even tasted nice to me when I never really liked fruits and vegetables. You are special in the eyes of God.
Create a habit of positive thinking and gratitude. Use things as reminders around your home or on your phone to remind you to think positive in that moment and list things that are good and that you are grateful for.
No ones life is ever a100%. That is never the case, everyone has things that they have to work on for the rest of their life. Most ppl choose to ignore their issues but you don't and that's the only way you can move forward and improve. Everyday things get better and I think you've made amazing progress just look back at your old videos! Keep reminding yourself habitually of everything that is good and that you've achieved. This has helped me tremendously and I hope you give it a go :)
Good to see that you're doing well! I wondered how you were doing a few days ago :) stay strong, stay healthy and have the best 2022!
I love this video. I watch it over and over, when I do my makeup. I thinking acceptance is first step to a happier life:)
Mayaaa😩♥️so good to see you
Mental Illnesses suck so bad😪
You are so beautiful💕 you remind me of someone I call my “aunt”. She’s so sweet and soft spoken . I hope you get the help you need💕
Ive missed u ❤️❤️so happy u posted. I deal with Anxiety, Add, Adhd, and borderline personality disorder. With no meds taking it one step at a time. You got this. Anything is better than 0%
I missed you so much happy new year. Even the healthy people life are not perfect or 100% nonody is a robot where allowed to try and smile through hard times I also workout and listening to music. Try praying to God I know it's personal but it helps
Miss you!!❤ you look amazing!
I love watching your videos , and I love the growth I’ve watched over the years with you . Keep your head up maya .your matter to us and to the world. Your strength is admirable honestly ❤️🖤
Please post, as a black woman you are an inspiration, and if you’re anything like me, you will manage it more with time. ✌🏾
Hey Maya, you can beat this. Remember me, my situation. But I’m here still fighting and doing better. I’m here for you. Make your mom proud. You are beautiful and smart just like her. I love you more than you can imagine.
I missed you so much on here Maya and your beautiful voice and truth ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ You look amazing too! You’ve got this, you’ve been held it down! ✨
Hi 🖐 I can relate. All the best and please keep making videos
Maya,
It’s okay to grieve the person you want to be but can’t. It’s okay to grieve that future you wanted for yourself.
Your videos aren’t boring.
It’s so obvious how hard you are struggling against the pain.
That takes an enormous amount of strength and determination.
Try to forgive yourself. It sounds like you don’t even let yourself eat without feeling guilty.
A living organism needs to consume energy to survive.
There is no need to continue punishing yourself for existing. For having needs and fulfilling those needs.
Try to forgive yourself. Extend empathy to yourself. You are so obviously hurting. Self-doubt and self-punishment will only worsen the torture.
We hate ourselves for the circumstances we can’t control, like our neurochemistry or trauma, because jt is easier to try to hold ourselves accountable than holding a trial with the indifference chaos of the universe. No one deserves anything. We will have regrets no matter which choices we make.
So why not be kind, especially to ourselves?
It js already a difficult road, so why choose to walk on the thorns?
Welcome back Maya.. just want to say I'm glad to see you back. You are loved and you are missed. Hope you post more. Here's to giving you your flowers while you're here. 💐
I’m glad to see you posting again despite the anxiety! I hope you continue to push through. Stay positive and take everything one day at a time ✨
So glad you’re back sweetheart, we’ve all missed you so much, and we’re all so proud of you.
You may not realise it, but, you help so many people, you make others realise they’re not alone.
Carry on just being you.
Can’t wait for the next video, big love from the UK!! 😘
Hi.
Love the videos. Love the honesy.
As long as I got a face, Maya has a place to sit.
It’s so good to see another video of yours Maya.
I’m really proud of the fact that you have chosen acceptance. In this life not everything can be 100%, but you take your power back when you understand that you’ll do your best with whatever you have.
You’re in my prayers and this gauntlet called life is one that you will definitely get through.
To stay positive maya, light a candle and speak positively over that candle and manifest what you want ok?
Bring in those positive vibrations of peace, love and strength to conquer everything that feels scary. 💜💜💜
Your a blessing babe... as acceptance was the only way I get by now.. knowing I am just me is okay.. and that I don't need to be anything else... yes medication does help completely agree, I take pills when I need them and not so much the sleeping ones. Try to sleep naturally and burn my energy through the day with dance it's so true.. yes I battle with hallucinations but its horrible ay... x
I admire your dedication and your bravery on talking about mental health and sharing your life experiences. You look so good 😊🤗🤗
Maya, I PRAY you read this message. One day God allowed me to feel what a person who suffers from Schizophrenia feels. I cried because I was shocked over the torment. Those are in deed spirits. NO, u don't have to live like that, for the rest of your life. The spirits are called radio active spirits. if you say this, both day and night: "I bind up all radio active spirits in Jesus name, and demand you go from now, in Jesus name!" you can in faith break the demons hold off of you. I'm praying for you. Please do this and anyone else who reads this who is experiencing symptoms involving schizophrenia.
So happy to see that beautiful face again ❤️❤️❤️ love you
These vids give me so much hope thank you and welcome back ❤
Im grieving my old self its very hard i hope one day there will be a cure I feel so sorry about this I know how hard it is its like a living hell
these videos have been helping me since high school thru my issues with psychosis when ive had no one that seemed to get it, im glad to see you getting better even if we relate in the deepest of waters that is this chronic illness, i wish you the best :3
I was so happy when I got a notification that you posted a video! I'm also struggling with staying positive. What helps me is repeating phrases in my head (like: "this to shall pass" or "I've been through worse, I can handle this".
So glad to see you post please stay positive and remember you do have friends
I'm glad you're okay. I can't imagine what it's like to deal with schizophrenia, but I can relate to anxiety and depression. I'm so proud that you're sharing your story.
You look so much better and happier than when I started following you 5 years ago
Heyyyyyy! I hope that you’ll continue to post videos. I don’t suffer from mental health issues but I’ve learned a lot abt schizophrenia from watching your videos and I’m sure you inspire a lot of ppl who are managing their illness as well. The journey isn’t easy but it’s worth it. I don’t know what it’s like for you but when you stop speaking bc of the voices I feel so bad, I wish I could help. I pray that doctors find a cure I really do💜💜💜
Hey Maya first off its great to get a video from you and secondly when it comes to my depression I've honestly taken a lot of how to deal with it from watching your videos so thank you. On top of that I've learned for my self it is creating that helps me, I dive deep into my art's. With what ever your art or arts of choice may be I'd recommend that and let your self express purely what ever you are feeling. My dad would always say to me when I would get into a deep hold "The opposite of depression is expression." and that saying has truly helped me a lot. Thank you again for the video and I hope this helps.
You looking good 👍, I've learned that loving someone unconditionally is loving them for who they are not who you want them to be..... Facts the good, bad, the ugly...
Hey Maya, glad your doing ok.
Anxiety seems impossible to overcome, it's so crippling at it's worst. I can totally agree that it's unlikely you'll be 100% confident and anxiety free, most people aren't I think, but you can get yourself to a place where you can at least expand the self imposed boundaries of your life and feel more fulfilled.
After 20+ years of it it does naturally improve, but you're right, the likely hood of 100% confident version of myself seems pretty remote. It's not impossible but to be honest, I'm not sure if I even care about being that person anymore. Self acceptance, even of imperfections and things you want to change, seems key. Perfection is overrated.
I think your videos hit at a time where the potential of CZcams as a communication tool was at it's peak, (kind of seems changed now, or I have), and your story, told by you, was the realest documentary you could ever watch. I've never seen it as moaning :)
Im so sorry for you..... It must be terrible hearing voice and hallucinating..... I have pretty bad anxiety and when i get in a slump i over think things and have constant thoughts and conversations in my head..... I don't hear voices, but the constant conversation and thoughts i have in my head are bad enough...... i couldnt imagine being able to handle hearing voices..... hope it gets better for you..