Will a man change for the right woman?

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  • čas přidán 24. 01. 2023
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Komentáře • 99

  • @TrippiNik
    @TrippiNik Před rokem +256

    I think a woman can be a heavy catalyst but a man will only change for himself when he wants to and realizes he needs to.

    • @thecoolpanda.
      @thecoolpanda. Před rokem +5

      💯

    • @chloelageaux769
      @chloelageaux769 Před rokem +4

      Very well said!

    • @madisonh1280
      @madisonh1280 Před rokem +5

      I agree. There is so much more that goes into change than just showing up as a " good woman" for a man. In psychology, there is empirical evidence that identifies 7 precursors to change and they are based in pivotal processes within the person on whom change depends. "A sense of necessity" is just one of them and I think that may be where meeting the woman that the man wants fits into the equation for him. The desire is so strong that it may create a sense of urgency... that and realizing he ain't gonna live forever so he needs something meaningful and sustainable to ground him in reality.😂

    • @Kiki32131
      @Kiki32131 Před rokem +1

      I love the way you articulated that, thank you.

    • @Thedancingdoc2028
      @Thedancingdoc2028 Před rokem

      This RIGHT HERE!!!!!!!

  • @saika.magoichi.214
    @saika.magoichi.214 Před rokem +102

    A lot of dudes nowadays refuse to even admit they have a problem to begin with. It's easier to just blame women for your problems instead of taking a deep look into your feelings and being open enough to admit your flaws which goes back to why people like Kevin Samuels, fresh and fit ect were able to thrive

  • @prophetesszakiyah2375
    @prophetesszakiyah2375 Před rokem +104

    My husband changed for me as I changed for him. Also we changed for The Most High overall first and foremost.

  • @ForbsieLaLa
    @ForbsieLaLa Před rokem +45

    People change for no one but themselves

  • @rrrj7816
    @rrrj7816 Před rokem +37

    It’s a shame that women are reduced to having to wait on a man to get it stuff together. Why be in a relationship with anyone until you get your stuff together!

    • @purplelove010
      @purplelove010 Před rokem +6

      It's like they're saying that even if you are a good woman because they feel like you're not the right one for them you're not worthy of their good side. You can be loyal caring, loving, fun, and supportive but a man won't change for you because despite all the good qualities, he doesn't value you enough to want to change and be a better man. Smh

    • @jsowards6342
      @jsowards6342 Před rokem

      Men get reduced as well.

  • @purplelove010
    @purplelove010 Před rokem +69

    My thing is a man could be with a good woman who is right for him but still not change. Therefore, it's not about the woman being the right one, it's about the man realizing his flaws and being willing to change.

    • @cemeciam.4019
      @cemeciam.4019 Před rokem +5

      There you go! Hit the nail on the head. ✨💕

    • @milanC4659
      @milanC4659 Před rokem +3

      Beautifully well stated!!!

    • @nahjacutler
      @nahjacutler Před rokem +6

      Exactly! They always trying to put it all us.

    • @haleycamille
      @haleycamille Před rokem +5

      I agree but if the right one holds him accountable, doesn’t reinforce his bad behavior and is willing to walk away, that’s what will trigger him to change. If the good woman just allows him to treat her any kind of way he will never change.

  • @tcbullock5432
    @tcbullock5432 Před rokem +49

    He definitely will change for a woman. It doesn’t have to be the “right” one though. With every relationship there’s growth and self reflection, so every woman that a guy dates will change him in a way, (vice versa) ,but the stubborn ones are only effected by the women that touch their hearts the most. ❤️

  • @sashalawrence4786
    @sashalawrence4786 Před rokem +33

    When a person or experience brings us closer to God it’s the right one.

  • @perrykeshahwalker5321
    @perrykeshahwalker5321 Před rokem +21

    Right on bro. When we men submit our lives to Christ, we become better equipped to be the husband and fathers that our families needs.

  • @offlier
    @offlier Před rokem +9

    I'm not entering any relationship where the man has some issues to deal with. Work it out and get back with me later. No. I'm not waiting on you. If I see you, I see you. If I don't, I don't.

  • @munix9351
    @munix9351 Před rokem +14

    Men change for something they can gain from you. Men have a natural predator antenna. They can assess very quickly what they can benefit from women. That's what makes them adapt. Men don't change. They adapt. I think women have bought into this idea that they are so wonderful and amazing that a man changed to be with them. No, they don't. Don't let them manipulate you. They adapt and maneuver.

  • @jerryhall5759
    @jerryhall5759 Před rokem +35

    I'm an example that a man will change for the right woman, when I met my wife of 16yrs; I had just graduated from college and started my engineering career; I was a womanizer( loved women) she came into my life and completely changed my mindset towards women; for the 1st time in my life I came across a woman who gave me a challenge( she Gained my utmost respect and love) women need to understand when you hand yourselves over to men on a platter, we'll never respect nor think about having something meaningful with you.. my wife made me work hard to get her( very hard to get) that steel curtain foundation we built in the beginning has kept us together all these years.... a good woman is the best thing a man can have 💯

    • @TheBLACKboard65
      @TheBLACKboard65 Před rokem +11

      Nice story and am happy for your happy ending. That said, clarification is needed - being a "womanizer" doesn't mean you love women - it means you're comfortable USING them. You met a woman who would not allow that. Hence, the "challenge".

    • @purplelove010
      @purplelove010 Před rokem +13

      I'm sorry but that's shallow of you to blame women as being straight forward and not playing hard to get as the reason why a man won't change. I'm glad you found true love but I also feel bad for those other women that you were with. You make it seem like those other women that you were with were not worthy enough to see your good side and that's sad.

    • @purplelove010
      @purplelove010 Před rokem +7

      @The BLACKboard Not allowing a man to disrespect you is considered being a challenge? I thought that was called self-respect.

    • @TheBLACKboard65
      @TheBLACKboard65 Před rokem +2

      @@purplelove010 - I suggest you re-read the initial post. He claimed the reason he changed is because his wife challenged him. I merely pointed out that the "challenge" was meeting someone who would not allow themselves to be used aka self-respect. We're saying the same thing.

    • @Ang_Nicole
      @Ang_Nicole Před rokem +2

      You haven’t actually changed if you think it’s a woman’s fault you were a womanizer in the first place.

  • @TheRacqgrl769
    @TheRacqgrl769 Před rokem +37

    Agreed. We must believe that change is worth the work. There is no losing when we change for the better.

  • @c.l.9344
    @c.l.9344 Před rokem +9

    I think a man will change for his dream girl / wifey. The ONE that aligns with his vision for the type of woman he wants to marry. ♥️💎

  • @Sandra.-.
    @Sandra.-. Před rokem +13

    Men don't change for that one woman. They change for themselves if the want to change. If he changes for a woman, that change will only last 3-6 months then he'll revert to old ways.
    This shouldn't be an encouragement for women to wait on or get back with a man who did them wrong in hopes that they'll change. If he changes, good for him and the next women who'll have to deal with him. But you, you've got to get on with your life. He wasn't meant for you

  • @agathangenzirabona8339
    @agathangenzirabona8339 Před rokem +13

    Every person changes for him or herself

  • @zero1188
    @zero1188 Před rokem +33

    Not really. Timing is key. He could of met that same girl years back and didnt take her seriously. Timing and experience over time determines. Men just say the woman he met changed him to make her feel better

    • @purplelove010
      @purplelove010 Před rokem +9

      And make the other women that they disrespected feel worthless

    • @zero1188
      @zero1188 Před rokem +5

      @@purplelove010 basically. You can meet the right person at the wrong time. And the right person at the right time

    • @purplelove010
      @purplelove010 Před rokem +6

      @@zero1188 If it's at the wrong time then the man should save a woman a heartache and just stay single.

    • @productioninquiry8937
      @productioninquiry8937 Před rokem +2

      I came to say just this... Timing+Opportunity. All these dudes are into prolonged adolescence now. Of course, you're ready to "change" at 42, and supress your bad habits just long enough to get her to marry you. Shu sounds like he knew a good thing when he saw it, but many men do not.

    • @zero1188
      @zero1188 Před rokem +2

      @@purplelove010 well, a women must be able to vet and pay attention to characteristics

  • @Keana43
    @Keana43 Před rokem +15

    He has to wanna change though. In some way it starts With him

  • @mw87675
    @mw87675 Před 6 měsíci +3

    Honey, if he won't change for God...he ain't changing for you either.

  • @niasquire
    @niasquire Před rokem +13

    Absolutely!!! Mine did 🥰🥰🥰 and I’ve found that I have changed for him as well.

    • @downbad2874
      @downbad2874 Před rokem +4

      😂 sure if that makes you feel better

  • @Sofondra
    @Sofondra Před rokem +8

    Beautiful testimony. TFS

  • @daughterofyah6209
    @daughterofyah6209 Před rokem +6

    I man shouldn’t be changing for a woman. He should just continue to grow in already said roles which is provider, protector and lover. I have never heard a alpha man changing for woman as much as he makes sure she has space in his life and makes sure he doesn’t lose out on a good thing.

  • @msdecemberloveangel8236
    @msdecemberloveangel8236 Před rokem +2

    From the fitime I saw ur video I knew u was a great man, and a young man with a lot of wisdom. Allow God to bring out ur best. It takes time to become all that the Creator wants u to be. It's all ready in u. Proud of u black man.

  • @survivorship4290
    @survivorship4290 Před rokem +1

    Beautiful message

  • @louloujade2931
    @louloujade2931 Před 5 měsíci +1

    Trust me Steve is not talking shit, I can promise you that. I’ve changed one man and it feels amazing. Where going to have the best future ❤

  • @annagrace1159
    @annagrace1159 Před rokem +5

    He shapes the hearts of each; He considers all their works.

  • @bedinabebe4521
    @bedinabebe4521 Před rokem +8

    In Africa there is family goal and expectation for everyone, Males inclusive, to marry and have children. It socially maked most people aware to prepare themselves and work towards the goal, although some take longer. It's sad to see so many of our Boys grow into Men confused, somewhat aimless and deviating away from the idea of establishing families. After embracing unnecessary mistakes they waste so much time (years, decades, their lifetime) and energy with a negative or toxic mindset. Fortunately your wife was your friend first, and a different Mr Right didn't remove her from the marriage market during the years that you weren't ready. Many women witness so many mistakes that it's a red light.🚦🛑

  • @bosslady4146
    @bosslady4146 Před rokem

    thanks so much your an inspiration

  • @cliftonbolton2484
    @cliftonbolton2484 Před rokem

    Great Video I enjoyed your content I think you will be the next Dr Phil stay blessed my brother.

  • @jsowards6342
    @jsowards6342 Před rokem +1

    Man me and my wife have gotten through our toughest part In our marriage. We actually talked heart to heart instead of bickering or fighting. Not going to lie it was very emotional. I held her hands told her I haven’t been the man I can be proud of, took my ego down, turned my pride off, (very hard for us stubborn young men), and told I could change. She told me she’d change as well as far as her talking down to me, or bashing me down. We cried i hens her and I feel really shitty how I’ve treated her. I totally forgot she is her own person and not someone I should get comfortable with. I’m comfortable with her as being myself but I don’t need to get comfortable in our relationship. I lost that sight as a man and it’s time I fix things by changing some bad habits of mine that I lean towards her.

  • @MeachumVillage
    @MeachumVillage Před rokem +3

    I see the change in you too! In your past videos you were cussin and filming while driving. Now I can show your videos to the youth group because you're not reckless driving and you're speaking with wisdom. I also appreciate the fresh lining with the waves. Show these young guys how to clean up! Question: Do you and your wife have a village supporting you and your marriage? Do you have a group of other Godly family men that you can confide in? Does she have that?

  • @i8874
    @i8874 Před rokem

    🙏🏾
    💯

  • @denesejamerson2356
    @denesejamerson2356 Před rokem +3

    We have to be "appropriate" in the first place.

  • @shenquejames7598
    @shenquejames7598 Před rokem

    Steve is right they will change for the woman they want sooner or later.

  • @juliaarambula3153
    @juliaarambula3153 Před 6 měsíci

    It can happen but it is rare. I wouldn’t lose sleep over it. Most that change for the so called right one go back to their own ways. Even the Christian ones.

  • @superodalisque
    @superodalisque Před rokem +4

    Hell naw. People's characters don't change that way that much. Humans are creatures of habit. On a rare occasion someone might at least for a few years change FOR somebody, but the vast majority won't.
    If a man changes it's really within and for themselves, not really due to any woman. It's for who they really want to be as a man-- that vision they have of themselves.
    I think some people think they're changing for a woman but that woman is really just a symbol of him being a man. That kind of woman validates his manhood just because she chose him. That type of woman is not going to take just anybody.
    Being a man is for him, , not a woman, no matter how much they love her. Not only do they love her they love what she says about what he represents. What she does is become a reflection of self love. She's his mirror. So if a man has a woman he doesn't like in his life she's exactly what he thinks he's worth.
    A goddess may help shape and form a man into a god but they have to want to change shape and recognize they were a god in the first place -- a legitimate part of the one you are close to.
    Some men choose to become gods they were born to be and others decide to continue running with the beasts of the field.

    • @cemeciam.4019
      @cemeciam.4019 Před rokem +1

      Ooooo powerful perspective. I love this, it definitely gives you something to think about. AND it holds each party responsible for their own path to change in their life and not reliant on the other party to change them. 💕✨

    • @superodalisque
      @superodalisque Před rokem +2

      @@cemeciam.4019
      We don't want to be doing codependence. That's not genuine love. The over dependence on women to make them is exactly what underpins some red pill philosophies. We're not their mommas.

    • @cemeciam.4019
      @cemeciam.4019 Před rokem +1

      @@superodalisque I wholeheartedly agree. You’re teaching a word. However, not many people will get the message. I try to have these conversations with friends and all of sudden I’m too hard and I’m a modern feminist… 🙄 But it’s not about being a feminist, everyone is responsible for their own life. We can motivate, inspire and even influence others but ultimately the last choice about what you envision your life to be is up to you.

    • @superodalisque
      @superodalisque Před rokem

      @@cemeciam.4019
      And it's about having real love in our lives that's not transactional etc... All of us deserve some joy for a change instead of just being chores and transactions all of the time.

  • @Sunny-tc3ul
    @Sunny-tc3ul Před rokem +2

    I can believe it. My husband said he changed his ways because of me.

  • @mshunter6210
    @mshunter6210 Před rokem

    🖤👑

  • @genovasquez8361
    @genovasquez8361 Před rokem +3

    Once a cheater always a cheater...
    Good men are born not made...
    Once a guy is hurt by a woman that he had a deep connection with, he stops being a good man.

  • @icysisdee9547
    @icysisdee9547 Před rokem

    I'm wondering if you're gonna touch on the Angryman and Destiny's debate.

  • @anthonynosike
    @anthonynosike Před rokem +4

    Alot of women dont want a man to change for them and they want the guy to come "ready". Thats the only issue. I know where they come from and the dating world is crazy but as a man, imma say that I'm a better and more motivated man when I have a good woman in my life.
    Edit: Alot of happily married men say things like "I'm a better man because of you". Thats where Im coming from. The man already wants better for himself and him getting th right woman is the icing on the cake.

    • @downbad2874
      @downbad2874 Před rokem +6

      The problem comes from you needing Simon else to make you want to be better it’s sad asf really u should want it for yourself you don’t want a woman who isn’t wife material do you so what’s that if not coming ready

    • @anthonynosike
      @anthonynosike Před rokem +4

      @@downbad2874 I want it for myself already. But a good woman can make me want it more and that's what I'm trying to say. The fact that I watch this channel proves that I want it for myself (I'm 26 n single)

    • @purplelove010
      @purplelove010 Před rokem +3

      @@anthonynosike You can have a good woman but still not change. Your ability to wanna change is not the fault of a woman.

    • @anthonynosike
      @anthonynosike Před rokem +3

      @@purplelove010 I was speaking for myself. Also, I already am making efforts to better my life as a single so thats different

  • @NeefahNee
    @NeefahNee Před rokem

    How long did u sit on you knowing your wife was the one you wanted to marry? @shamakeway

    • @Lexlex11848
      @Lexlex11848 Před rokem +1

      He has a video called “how I knew my wife was the one “

    • @NeefahNee
      @NeefahNee Před rokem

      @@Lexlex11848 thank you girl imma go look for it now💕

    • @TheShumakeWay
      @TheShumakeWay  Před rokem +9

      We weren’t together when I had that revelation but that was 2018. We got together in December of 2020 and we got married in April of 2021. During a lot of that period of time we weren’t even in communication with each other, but it ended up working out.

    • @NeefahNee
      @NeefahNee Před rokem +2

      @@TheShumakeWay thank you so much for replying and sharing this information, great video btw💕

    • @TheShumakeWay
      @TheShumakeWay  Před rokem +1

      @@NeefahNee Not a problem at all. Thank you

  • @missladybrowntop1350
    @missladybrowntop1350 Před rokem

    You're not even lying either what you are saying