I MARRIED AN EMOTIONAL/PHYSICAL ABUSER AND I DIDN'T KNOW UNTIL I MOVED IN | EP 48
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- Äas pĆidĂĄn 7. 07. 2024
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One of our listeners sent in her story where she describes her experience of the horror she experienced in the the early stage of marriage having learnt when she moved in with her significant other, that he was the complete opposite of who she thought he was.
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Iâm looking for marriage atm and hearing this story puts me off so bad đ please Allah bless me with a genuine, loving lifelong spouse Ameen
Keep praying sis and I will for you and others inshalah
@@deeqaabdullahi5777 Will do Jazakallah khayr đ«¶đ»
That's my worst fear wallahi... Someone pretending to be this angel just waiting like how a predator waits on it's prey
2 mins in and I'm already so shocked, I hope she's okay, if you're reading the comments we are here for you sis! â€
Women should have left him asap!
She stayed too long ended up broken used and treated like garbage
@@piqueny8872â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€â€
My life exactly. My soon to be ex husband cheated and did the exact thing minus the physical abuse. Used exact words to make me feel useless. Iâm glad I got out with my kids. New revert here, lots of love from Atlanta GA.
I am so sorry for what you've gone through!! Getting out of that sort of abuse is one of the hardest things I've had to do, and I can only imagine how exponentially harder it is with kids... you are a warrior mama, your kids have a great role model to teach them their worth, and boundaries! May Allah always help you and give you strength, peace and happiness InshaAllah
I have been in this for 13 years minus other women and physical abuse , but been through so much emotional abuse and narcissistic behaviour and gaslighting , inshallah i will get out soon , make dua for me , I have 3 kids and it's hard .
@@user-fs2du9sd8j it will happen In shaa Allah ...Have faith in Allah and get all the support you can ...sadly I didn't receive no support from parents but Alhamdullilah I got out after many years .
I think this guy has a porn addiction along with narcissistic personality disorder, he is very dangerous. You never confront them alone as theyâre capable of anything.
Its stories like this one which prove there is no significance in men claiming they file for divorce less than women. What significance is it if it's not a functioning healthy marriage? It's best that they leave. Their whole thought process is, "Even if I hate you, I'll still try to keep us together." Such a sick and twisted way of thinking. Men do not file for divorce officially, but they instigate divorce by doing the very behaviors which will lead to divorce. So this won't be calculated in the divorce stats.
How much you wanna bet that he made it HELL for her to divorce him?đOn the outside other brothers think he's such a good guy getting mistreated by his wife. This is why I don't take advice from bothers because they don't ever show each other their true face. Us sisters have to find out on our own because they way they treat each other is not a measure of how they'll treat us. We have to go in blind. Thats whats so scary about marriage to me. May Allah make it easy for us.
the worst part is that it's her parents that brought this guy into her life, they did not know this guy enough, or he was just too good at hiding his true self.
She should have checked all his social media profiles
Or at least had brothers or someone follow him to see how heâs living
Most Asian parents have ruined their childrens lives by arranging forced marriages .....consequences are soul destroying...
@@taminakhan4690 if a adult child show its parent they Are mature wise responsible show independency displays self control respect. Parents wonât force the children into arranged marriages. They would trust the adult children to find the right/ correct find god fearing spouse for themselves
Cousin of mine mommas boy/ man child his parents found his spouse, his parents paid for his wedding, his parents made him live with them knowing he can not look after himself or his spouse
They did this so he wouldnât get a girlfriend or become addicted to hookers or using his hand.
Itâs up to the next generation to make a change and stop allowing cultural âarrangedââ interference permanently
@@piqueny8872 in my case I was taken abroad in the 70,s and forced to marry a stranger by my strict (whom I was terrified of ) father....I tried to refuse but was told I couldnt.....long sad story ....The consequences are still present . My daughters I made sure this never happened to them đŻđđ
This was so validating. Just got out of a toxic relationship too. Only time can heal. And duas and Allahs help. And of course good company and friends. And a good counseller.
May allah swt bless your healing sisâ€
Time doesnât heal anything but the creator of time does
Kally took the words out my mouth xoloo. Girl just run may Allah make it easy for you
She should have informed her family for protection especially before when he started abusing her!
Love you both, keep up the hard work and consistency. You're amazing!!
Thank you so much!!
I wish if I can give her a hug, I hope she is getting all the proof before she files for divorce.
Itâs astonishing how this type of man is everywhere ⊠sadly i can relate to her situation
Wow i love this channel i just found it i love itđ€Łđ€Ł
The truth is these type of men have been spoilt at a young age and they're also not self aware of the disgustingness that they are. They believe they're superior and deserve to have everything they want.
This is a full blown narcissist. These people can hide their true selves for up to two years. Very scary. May Allah heal her.
Wow, alhumdullilah Allah showed me this guys true colours in 2 weeks of getting to know him. Almost 2 months on and I'm still healing so i cannot imagine what she's going through. This guy was using religion to control me, he clearly had a past and was projecting on me. I might email you the details đ
Soooo crazyyyy. What the heckkk. He earned her trust and then betrayed her... such a horrible manipulative thing to do
I'm not sure who's who as this is my first time on the channel, but the one on the right, I totally get what you're saying about the guy. He has issues and is projecting.
One word "Narcissist "! Unfortunately ,that was my ex husband many years ago. Forgave him but he did not change. Narcissists never change ,so get out as soon as you see their real side.
Wow. May Allah keep her safe. I hope her family will protect her and not send her back to her abuser and God forbid we lose another sister.
Title sad marriage story a lot can relate
Say wallahi waan idiin salaamay gabar wadaad ah oo aan afsoomaliga bara ii soo raadiya
May Allah bless both of you beautiful sisters â€
It's called gaslighting.
Girls, your language, we are Muslims!!! May Allah reward and bless đ€ČđŸ
I donât even believe itâs true every thing is seeking view and money cuz she is reading from her cellphone đąđąđąđąđą
It's just a detail but could you reduce a little bit the volume of the intro sound please đđđ«° thank you
Im going through the same here and he even say bad thing to his friends and family about me he divorced me but he tell people I'm the one who beg for divorce...He dont even talk or asking for his son either its so sad im so sad it's has even caused me to get miscarriage đ
Some of the situation can be avoided in the future If he a good man, and he get the blessings of her parents if she has family. If she doesnât then have him get the blessings from your Mosque Imamđ€ČđŸđđŸ
Men behaves that way , coz he is knows he is in the wrong and the guilt is eating him up , so stupidly he takes out on the woman, he is insecure messed up man. Men like that NEVER changes⊠unfortunately, been there⊠May Allah swt makes it easy for her and guides him to the correct way too.. Easier said than done but she should leave him..
From what i have heard about that story. may Allah grant her a great man that will treat her right but I think that guy was mentally ill. All this he said about her, he felt it so he had to project it on her.
Yes sis needs to heal and love herself and turn to allah swt
Iâm actually disgusted I hope she heals Ű§Ù ŰŽŰ§ŰĄ ۧÙÙÙ đ„čđ€
Xalimo telling the story of a divorce đ„±
This vid randomly came up on my homepage, probably cause I'm a Somali guy lol, and I just got listening to you guys. I sometimes question the legitimacy of some of these scenarios, and I'm almost disbelieving that women would put up with un-islamic men like this. Wth??? She is well within her rights to end the marriage. I'm not advocating for a quick divorce or not exercising 'sabr' (patience). I'm saying know your value and recognise when you're in an abusive relationship where your husband doesn't cherish the importance of marriage.
It's easier said then done bare in mind also that everyone has their own experiences and sometimes these things do hit you by surprise. So don't judge a book by it's cover because some people really do have hidden agendas even when it comes to marriage. This is today's reality and as unforunate these events are people simply just don't fear Allah, May Allah protect us from such individuals. Ameen!!
@@Liya916 ameen, I totally get what you mean and may Allah protect our sisters from men like this. But I'm saying to leave as soon as you find out that hes doing all this madness.
Un Muslim men? Muslim men are the worst they hide behind religion,true hypocrites
@@bawwizzy55some get stuck for long period of times bc they have kids with the man. May Allah swt help us all, rlly scary wlhi
This married girl went to her parents for help left her husband had the courage to do so but her parents especially her mum never cared for daughters feelings they took her back to the monster
He is a classic narcissist
Work through your major demons like different addictions u need to just stay alone.
Sis your voices are really low in some videos and its really hard to focus and hear literally and its not my phones fault cuz its just some videos u guys have
Yeah itâs a bit lower
Gen z and late millennium generation yâall lucky you have social media to clarify your potential spouse.
Before marriage looking into all there social media profiles, who they are following, what pictures theyâre are liking, the friend groupâs
Looking deeply into there pictures, drinks foods places they are in!
They way there Relatives dress look interactions ect
Get a good clear minded research
Hopefully if your morals values and religion is good youâll automatically pick up on the âharamââor unethical patterns.
Donât fall for the glitz and glamor vacations pictures the way they look hoping youâll one day get that too!
I know a woman she feels like a princessâ unhappy sad in a. Castle her husband doesnât love or resoect her
SubhanAllah this is so wild, Iâm just so confused as to how someone can do a complete 360- if they had a argument or disagreement pre marriage was this not picked up. May Allah make it easy for the sisterâ€
Will always be red flags
It's 180. 360 would be full circle đ” and back where they started.
The girl saw it coming but she neglected the redflags... She knew he was a bad boi... Normally I don't pity any girl that choose wrong. God has always given girls the overwhelming chances to choose the right guy but they'll still go for the bad guyđ
When you see a guy who's already good with girls right from start, it's not hard to tell he'll later manipulate you as well. If he was naive he'll most likely not do that but he's got experience and she got pleasured through that; that's what bad bois do...
Not true its the nice quiet seeming guys that do this too
Praying fasting and umrah still seeing escourts prostitutes, I know this first hand then blame the woman saying she is not a good wife it's so sad
@@Xxdeenoverdunyahxx nice quiet that hardly even get girls or what??? Niice quiet that girls don't even find attractive or what???đđ€Š Seems you don't even know what you're saying đ€Šđ€Š
Shutup u think yr perfect
Asian parents have a lot to answer to Allah ...forced arranged marriages on their children ...sadly children are left with the terrible consquences all around .
Well where do I start. First of all, like how can you imply all men are sick as this psychopath. Such comments you made saying men make you sick? Can I ask you something how would you feel a a white woman said all black women are lazy. Youâd think the women needs help as to paint a whole race with the same brush. But imagine painting a whole gender with the same brush, including your father and if you have a brothers? What you should have focused on is the sick individual. And men should not be mentioned as all.
Secondly itâs also the womenâs fault, coz she donât know how to set boundaries. She should have left that psycho when she first found out that he was not faithful but she chose to stick around and then got beaten up and had she sticked around even more no doubt sheâd be killed. But itâs her fault. For choosing such a man. Maybe itâs coz girls like bad boys. So enjoy the rain at 3am in your pjs.
Also why would you give the time of day light to someone whoâs not praying. Like he doesnât give his due respect to his lord what makes you think that heâll be loyal to you.
How do i know he doesnât pray someone who prays wonât go on such sites as she cought him with also we are humans if he was to go on such sites while he prays due to weakness he wonât be so arrogant about it. Heâd feel such a huge amount of guilt that he wonât be able to manipulate her. Bcoz of the guilt becoz he prays.
But ladies go marry yourselves men who donât pray and cry about it late.
So naive of you to write this .. just pray your sisters/relatives dont get married to this scammers.
he was lying to her at the beginning and then switched up also she might have not left straight away because he was maybe threatening her you donât always know the full story so dont blame her subhanAllah. may Allah guide you, what would you do if this was your sister
This was a good video but the sound quality made me want to exit. I had my laptop on the highest volume and your voices were still low, when you guys would yell it'd be blasting then back to low and or when an advertisement showed up super loud. Please fix that for the next video
Thank you weâll defo work on this !!!
Wow! That poor woman! May she receive every blessing in compensation for such a trial! My husband is good to me but he flat out told me that he loves me but if he goes to visit relatives or traveling on business he will go to a prostitute if he wants. đ€·đ»ââïžđșđžđžđŠ
How he is muslim and seeing đ đ€ this
@@9087jo thatâs what I mean. All men can be a bit toxic on occasion. He just doesnât want the woman to be emotionally involved or pregnant and in many European countries; prostitution is legal and government regulated to prevent diseases. Many wealthy Arabs do that and the Emiratis donât even need to leave Dubai but itâs not legal there. đ€·đ»ââïž
â@@BQ900subhanallah that's crazy and disgusting at the same time, sister look out for your well being and mental health, May Allah guide him to the right path . I believe you deserve better
I guess he was not looking for a wife he was looking for a maid, and she wasnât having it at all. May Allah gives her strength to recover đ€
Xolođ I love the somali comments
He was narcissist. It is clear
Gaslighting
Sisters behave yourself
Bye niyahow
Sister please go to the doctor and check your self he's walking disease
Power playing husbands after they trap them
â€â€â€â€
Stonewalling
Speak louder on mic plz
I know you're innocent and don't know when commenting such like that but This family need help and seek a consultation from( mental,family,shaykh)esl. this guy .and please any girl choose Deen over anything else.
So early
Always 2 sides to the story. The girls said she was a virgin and he realised thatâs she wasnât. This happens all the time unfortunately.
and how does that justify the abuse?
Prostitutes arenât virgins
An ossue in marriage should be reported to both side of tge family and not presenting it to youtube and trashing you image in the face of tge world, i dknt even wanna listen to you, just because of you swearing, that said you fails your edhcation, before marrying someone. You sgudg tge person, and his behavior and look at his friend, and his source of income and his religion, not doing proper check will leaves you miserable. And stop showing us you fails education by swearing at a muslim that his wife fails to comply to his demand at tge begin, here is shy the cheating start
Could you please re write all of it. I can't understand some of it.
Sounds like naznin husbands she went all over the place
Typical Low class women, always talking about their abusive partner and other cheap stories.
Wtf?
â@@OneUmmah11this guy is exactly like the guy from the story
Typical low class men seeking out vulnerable weak women
â@@Julia-kg5vuexactly
What's your ig