This was one of my first Snob episodes and remains one of my favorites. Especially with lines like "Merry Christmas! The Nazis _win!"_ and "I think we're still not getting higher than a PG-13." So happy to see it reuploaded. I'll consider it an early Christmas gift.
When Brad first reviewed this movie, he thought it was among the weirdest of Christmas movies. Now, after Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas, A Christmas Elf Named Calvin, and Santa Visits the Magic Land of Mother Goose; he knows better
Hellsing needs more appreciation for its level of historic correctness.Nazi vampire armies don't seem to be so over the top when compared to the elve breeding project.
For those who are wondering who was at the door, it was 80s Dan. This review tied into the 80s Dan Christmas Special that year. (Man, I miss 80s Dan... Maybe he's hanging out with Kung Tai Ted somewhere... Or 90s Kid...)
Why haven't they made a killer reindeer movie, yet? Rudolph's Revenge. About a talking reindeer named Rudolph that goes on a killing spree and spouts out puns, before killing his victims. We had killer snowmen, killer gingerbread cookies, killer turkeys, but no killer reindeer? Get to it, indie film makers!
I'm so glad he's reuploading these.. Now I dont have to begrudgingly watch some bullshit bootleg channel that stole his shit. I always kinda feel bad doing that knowing he doesn't get credit.
Stoned Gremlin Productions oh I’m not complaining or saying you are doing too much Christian and not enough horror, just find it funny to think what old you would have said to reviewing Christian films of the year.
@@hipsterelephant2660 The idea that the characters in those movies are what the producers think atheists are like or using religious faith to justify awful actions is certainly more horrifying than teenagers getting murdered by lunatics with poorly applied make up to me.
@@BronzeBoy520 When you add an additional exploitation subgenre to the show, naturally there's gonna be a lot of backlog you'll have to explore. Hmm... how long has it been since we've had some actionsploitation?
I was hoping this one would get a reupload! I always misremember the mall scenes in this (before Dan Haggarty meets up with them) as coming from, like, Chopping Mall or something.
You know Snob, I am alot like you ,like when you said you`d kill the mother if she killed a cat. I`m 100% with you! Cats are SO important to me, I`d gladly do 20 years in prison if that happened in front of me!!!!!!
Maybe next year (if we are good boys and girls) we will get Caligula - The Best of The Cinema Snob. I know, its not a Christmas movie, but it would make for a great Christmas present.
I was asking that question too, but at the same time, I'm scared of the answer. Considering the main's genetic lineage, however, and the fact that little bro said he wanted to see her boobs earlier in the movie, the fact that they're still blood related is unfortunately a possibility. *Projectile vomits*
@@Danko_Sekulic Well, Daenarys Targaryan was the result of inbreeding. Then again, the Targaryan's inbreeding takes more of a mental effect. The Targaryan Madness page on the wiki says it all.
@@Danko_Sekulic meh, a one off incident is unlikely to result in anything out of the ordinary, provided neither mom or pop has any pronounced defects or syndromes. It's not a great idea, but the more concentrated the gene pool gets, the more likelihood of pulling a bad combo out of the bag, if I may mix my metaphors...
Okay we have the angry video game nerd playing home alone games with M. Cullkin, nostalgia critic having a home alone skit metaphor in the Nutcracker with nazis 3D movie review, and cinema snob with a review about nazis creating elf gremlins. It’s a coordinated attack, Brace yourselves!!!!
@@BronzeBoy520 yeah...but... If you make jokes about them..then you're making light of them..which in turn means you are a Nazi. I dunno how that makes sense but kids these days get those sweet sweet social brownie points and cyber back pats for calling out such things. Get with the times, virtue signaling and recreational outrage is all the craze!
I would who was at the door? At first I that it was a build up to a joke but when it didn’t lead to anywhere, it got me intrigued. The mystery behind the door is probably a more interesting story that the movie. Haha
i know this comment is for the wrong movie but i think silent night deadly night 2 is my all time fav good bad movie. i love it so much i barely consider it a "bad" movie at all
Wow, this episode is kinda old. And this movie is so weird. Also, I can totally believe that detective guy (already forgot his name after just finishing the episode lol) got shot in that scene.
I guess if you do think about it elves do kind of remind you of trolls not the computer trolls either. I'm talking about the ones that live under a bridge.
Ordinarily I would feel bad for the mother getting sexually assaulted by her father, but in this case I think that it's called preemptive justice; my only complaint is that she was drugged for it. Btw Snob my condolences for Lloyd and Cloey if I’m remembering correctly, losing family sucks.
2:37 well.. considering that pieces of paper do not have sex organs.... the answer is yes. She is a virgin, and you watch great movies _for a living_ 12:35 uh oh... is that the commercial break knocking at the halfway point again?
On paper, this sounds like a really fun idea, it's so batshit crazy. But it seems as if the people who made it didn't really care. It looks boring and joyless. It doesn't help that they hired a weary, broken-down Dan Haggerty who is clearly thinking, "Oh god, is this what my life has become?" Or that the elf is a cheap little puppet that looks like shit. It's sad, this could have been a very enjoyable B-movie.
"I want to know the connection between the elves and the Nazis."
🤣🤣🤣
Watching Dan Haggerty do a library search for "Mystical symbols and runes" gets me every time! 🤣 9:54
That's my absolute favorite Lloyd cut away at the beginning. His face is sincerely T-shirt worthy.
Side note: thank you, Brad, for being such an animal lover.
This was one of my first Snob episodes and remains one of my favorites. Especially with lines like "Merry Christmas! The Nazis _win!"_ and "I think we're still not getting higher than a PG-13." So happy to see it reuploaded. I'll consider it an early Christmas gift.
You can easily tell the new Snob fans from the old Snob fans by whether or not they know who 80's Dan is.
Haseo Reviews I vaguely know of him. I preferred Kung Tai Ted
Real veterans know the big box model
Rest in peace to one of the best of us. May he and his brethren El Topo Chico and the first episodes of Radiodrome find their eternal slumber.
When Brad first reviewed this movie, he thought it was among the weirdest of Christmas movies. Now, after Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas, A Christmas Elf Named Calvin, and Santa Visits the Magic Land of Mother Goose; he knows better
I wouldn’t call Saving Christmas weird, just preachy
What about Santa vs the Martians
Man this is probably of the most mean spirited Christmas movie ever. And i saw Gremlins.
Gremlins was actually delightful in how depraved it could get. This is just nasty and vile.
Hellsing needs more appreciation for its level of historic correctness.Nazi vampire armies don't seem to be so over the top when compared to the elve breeding project.
Amen
Goblins ? Orcs?
Christmas specials In 240p are just as good as Christmas specials in 4k.. Thanks for the re-upload and Happy Holidays!!
Excuse me. It's "Merry Christmas," not "Happy Holidays." LOL Just kidding. Have youself a Happy Christmahanakwanzika.
18:15 - 18:21
I love how she just goes _"No?"_ to that line. Like even she's wondering what the Hell was up with that one-liner.
For those who are wondering who was at the door, it was 80s Dan. This review tied into the 80s Dan Christmas Special that year.
(Man, I miss 80s Dan... Maybe he's hanging out with Kung Tai Ted somewhere...
Or 90s Kid...)
"80s Dan is Filmed in Rankin-Bass Vision!"
Isn't Kung Tai Ted dead?
No, just horribly crippled.
I always thought it was the police coming to question him about the dead body across the street
But the question remains: Why edit it out in the first place?
Dan Haggerty is the only person from the 70's that seems like they need more cocaine. Emote, man!
Ok, when that one gal went "huh?" when you made that "lost gap girls" joke was priceless 😂. omg the acting in this film is painfully hokey.
You should have shown the scene where the main girl says, "Die, you little fa**ot", before destroying the elf.
That's an actual line in this movie.
Oh, I like the feel of these old Snob episodes.
The best episodes really are the ones where the very premises of the movie makes you sit up and take notice.
"Well, they finally did it. They killed my fucking car." 😆😆
And once again Loid steals the entire episode with 5 seconds of screen time.
7:24 That is a crowning moment of awesome.
I remember this,glad to see this one re-uploaded
The best movie ever made about Grizzly Adams taking on Nazis and Nazi Elves.
You mean a single Nazi Elf.
Happy birthday Brad
We need an RLM/Snob crossover. They've covered a lot of the same movies...
I love The Ninth Gate!
Why haven't they made a killer reindeer movie, yet? Rudolph's Revenge. About a talking reindeer named Rudolph that goes on a killing spree and spouts out puns, before killing his victims. We had killer snowmen, killer gingerbread cookies, killer turkeys, but no killer reindeer? Get to it, indie film makers!
This has been Wolfenstein: The New Christmas
4:29 Lloyd cameo!
I'm so glad he's reuploading these.. Now I dont have to begrudgingly watch some bullshit bootleg channel that stole his shit.
I always kinda feel bad doing that knowing he doesn't get credit.
Lovin' the re-uploads!!! Keep 'em coming!
"Merry Christmas! The Nazi's win!"
Is that not the case with all Christmas movies? I need to widen my film selections.
Back when Snob reviewed horror movies and porn, instead of Christian films and porn... which is scarier then horror
Horror episodes this year: 19
Religious episodes: 6
There's still plenty ;) Though you're right, Little Piece of Heaven is way scarier.
Stoned Gremlin Productions oh I’m not complaining or saying you are doing too much Christian and not enough horror, just find it funny to think what old you would have said to reviewing Christian films of the year.
Your telling me those religious episodes weren't horror?
@@hipsterelephant2660 The idea that the characters in those movies are what the producers think atheists are like or using religious faith to justify awful actions is certainly more horrifying than teenagers getting murdered by lunatics with poorly applied make up to me.
@@BronzeBoy520 When you add an additional exploitation subgenre to the show, naturally there's gonna be a lot of backlog you'll have to explore.
Hmm... how long has it been since we've had some actionsploitation?
my favorite episode of the cinema snob ♡
I love that Lloyd reacts like
👁👁 … 🤨🫥
Chopping Mall was high art compared to this madness.
😂😂😂
Absolute truth. Gonna go watch it for that opening theme song.😂
I was hoping this one would get a reupload!
I always misremember the mall scenes in this (before Dan Haggarty meets up with them) as coming from, like, Chopping Mall or something.
I just watched the red letter media best of the worst episode featuring this gem. Happy Elves day to me!!
You know Snob, I am alot like you ,like when you said you`d kill the mother if she killed a cat. I`m 100% with you! Cats are SO important to me, I`d gladly do 20 years in prison if that happened in front of me!!!!!!
Thank you for re-uploading this.
Maybe next year (if we are good boys and girls) we will get Caligula - The Best of The Cinema Snob. I know, its not a Christmas movie, but it would make for a great Christmas present.
We would all love that
I have this movie and been meaning to watch it...it's been three years since I got it
Wait, if the protagonist was conceived as the result of incest, how does her little brother figure into this? Is he adopted?
I was asking that question too, but at the same time, I'm scared of the answer. Considering the main's genetic lineage, however, and the fact that little bro said he wanted to see her boobs earlier in the movie, the fact that they're still blood related is unfortunately a possibility. *Projectile vomits*
@@AnInsideJoke We hope you've enjoyed no moral theater.
Also, how come she is a pretty girl of normal intelligence?? Incest normally doesn't produce the finer specimens of tge species!
@@Danko_Sekulic Well, Daenarys Targaryan was the result of inbreeding. Then again, the Targaryan's inbreeding takes more of a mental effect. The Targaryan Madness page on the wiki says it all.
@@Danko_Sekulic meh, a one off incident is unlikely to result in anything out of the ordinary, provided neither mom or pop has any pronounced defects or syndromes. It's not a great idea, but the more concentrated the gene pool gets, the more likelihood of pulling a bad combo out of the bag, if I may mix my metaphors...
They're not working for Santa... anymore.
Because they're gonna be in a craptastic horror film! With Grizzly Adams!
RIP Lloyd. crazy this was like 11 years ago. hope youre doing well
Okay we have the angry video game nerd playing home alone games with M. Cullkin, nostalgia critic having a home alone skit metaphor in the Nutcracker with nazis 3D movie review, and cinema snob with a review about nazis creating elf gremlins.
It’s a coordinated attack, Brace yourselves!!!!
Yea! Elves! Yea bodies in the streets! Wait, not the last one.
Back when Nazis were just a threat in movies, and not the dweebs getting mad at this comment.
Sambou Jaiteh Well what are Nazis but the jokes of human history. Let us all point at them and mock them for being Nazis.
@@BronzeBoy520 yeah...but... If you make jokes about them..then you're making light of them..which in turn means you are a Nazi. I dunno how that makes sense but kids these days get those sweet sweet social brownie points and cyber back pats for calling out such things. Get with the times, virtue signaling and recreational outrage is all the craze!
Virgin Alt-right. Chad Snob.
GyroMurphy dammit, I’m a nazi. Hope my jewish wife doesn’t find out
Don't call them Nazis, they are Republicans.
How is it that 12 years later I finally know what the Snob means by Moral Orel?
Dead body on the front lawn of a Chicago home. What's weird about that?
Poor cat why did the mother kill her daughter’s cat why?
11:39 Uh wait a minute. Is she standing in front of a gun rack that says "gift ideas for mom"?
To be fair, a few shotgun rounds in the ass IS a really good gift for the mom in this film.
What kind of mom wouldn't want a rifle or shotgun (can't tell in the video).
I would who was at the door? At first I that it was a build up to a joke but when it didn’t lead to anywhere, it got me intrigued. The mystery behind the door is probably a more interesting story that the movie. Haha
We do not speak of the man who was at the door.
@@BWMagus Phelan Porteous?
i know this comment is for the wrong movie but i think silent night deadly night 2 is my all time fav good bad movie. i love it so much i barely consider it a "bad" movie at all
Yeah I remember this movie a long time ago I didnt know the title though man it was freaking weird 😧
was wondering when you'd re-upload this one.
This is real Troll 3
Wow, this episode is kinda old.
And this movie is so weird.
Also, I can totally believe that detective guy (already forgot his name after just finishing the episode lol) got shot in that scene.
Well it’s 2020 and I finally watched this as a Christmas movie.... Fitting
I guess if you do think about it elves do kind of remind you of trolls not the computer trolls either. I'm talking about the ones that live under a bridge.
A very good christmas Horror classic is Santa slay.
Phelous reviewed that one in 2009.
Santa spraying sanitizer on the stripper pole cracks me up every time.
IT'S BACK!!!~
Happy B-day Brad
How have I not seen this before?
You mean a month-long marathon? Yes please
STOP KILLING CATS IN HORROR MOVIES GODDAMMIT
The most horrifying thing about this movie is the simple fact that it is still better than the christmas elve named Kalvin
oh that principal from ferris buller always looking for young boys
6:40 moral Orel reference
Sometimes you have to wonder how does movies even got enough people to work on...
AaronTheBlackDragon blackmail and the universal need to eat sometime in the week, I'd imagine
12:40 One cut to an excerpt from 80's Dan later...
movie is funny as hell
Wait when did you review the corpse grinders
Ahhhh. Classic low quality Snob.
The little girl with the brown hair and white bow looks like me as a kid. I even had a dress like her
Ordinarily I would feel bad for the mother getting sexually assaulted by her father, but in this case I think that it's called preemptive justice; my only complaint is that she was drugged for it. Btw Snob my condolences for Lloyd and Cloey if I’m remembering correctly, losing family sucks.
Librarians like, "It is a joke, I like to fuck with uptight Christians who only read part of one book"
Jesus, this was 7 years ago?
Eight now
He’s gonna star in a movie called elves
Ahh, Elves in a pre-Calvin world.
And Nazism without a Not See Cola in sight.
It was a more innocent time.
Okay, That Knock on the door . Was that part of the review ?or did Brad say “ Fuck it! I’ll leave it in!”
ahh the Edge Flanders era
The librarian looks like jack black
Santa said oral!
"Merry Christmas! The Nazis win!"
Was this review filmed in 2016?
Originally Aired: 12/6/2011
12:36 Who was at the door?
80s Dan. This tied into the 80s Dan Christmas Special that year.
Just curious... how old is Lloyd?
2:37 well.. considering that pieces of paper do not have sex organs.... the answer is yes. She is a virgin, and you watch great movies _for a living_
12:35 uh oh... is that the commercial break knocking at the halfway point again?
You should do an episode of Dark Dungeons.
0:57, 0:58 name of the movie, pls ?
I own this movie...
Nick V
Good for you
Shame no one cares
Check out mind trap with dan haggerty
Hey, Snob, what with so many uses of the word Elf, why wouldn't this just be caslled Trolld?
0:25 Which episode was that? XD
Who was knocking at the door?
80s Dan
This movie is awesome, it’s so funny and so bad at the same time. I hope a company like Shout Factory or Vinegar Syndrome saves it from vhs obscurity.
Ooooooooo very scary.
On paper, this sounds like a really fun idea, it's so batshit crazy. But it seems as if the people who made it didn't really care. It looks boring and joyless. It doesn't help that they hired a weary, broken-down Dan Haggerty who is clearly thinking, "Oh god, is this what my life has become?" Or that the elf is a cheap little puppet that looks like shit. It's sad, this could have been a very enjoyable B-movie.
Stoned Elf Productions
Is it wrong to say that I miss that set? xD ( been a fan of your work during the "worst set of the show" era.)
Is that the one where he was just sitting on the basement floor?
@@TheRealNormanBates it's the one he is in. Because There were no posters to hang up.
Come on sure he isnt the best actor out there but did they have to call Cary Elves a troll.