What not to say to someone with a chronic illness

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  • čas přidán 27. 09. 2015
  • Ever wanted to know what NOT to say to someone living with a chronic illness? Well here is your 101 on things you probably shouldn't say.
    A shout out to everyone in the support groups who left comments and gave us inspiration for this video. We wish we could have included all of them but this clip would have gone on for hours!
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    Music by Purple Planet

Komentáře • 110

  • @graeground
    @graeground Před 6 lety +23

    OH MY GOD!!! “At least it’s not cancer!” THAT ONE IS THE WORSSSSTTTT

  • @ohwowitsthatguy9154
    @ohwowitsthatguy9154 Před 8 lety +34

    I could easily see you as an actress. Nice video.

  • @DarkJarris
    @DarkJarris Před 8 lety +41

    I think I've heard pretty much every one of these, including the bonus round of "thats a smokers cough" No jackass, its CF.

    • @joshuecanary
      @joshuecanary Před 8 lety +4

      we in the netherlands we made a joke about the bonus round as cfers among eachother when one coughs we all shout stop smoking xF

    • @joshuecanary
      @joshuecanary Před 8 lety +1

      +Glenn Kievit xF= xD

    • @heatherbilly4223
      @heatherbilly4223 Před 6 lety

      Dark Jarris have you watched the CZcams channel- The Frey Life. ? One of my favorite vloggers. Husband and wife, and wife (Mary) has CF.

  • @alliem8700
    @alliem8700 Před 6 lety +10

    The "at least it's not cancer!" one bothers me so much. I get it, cancer sucks, my mother died of it when I was a toddler...but as I see it, there are USUALLY 2 options when it comes to cancer. Either, it gets worse until you die, or you get better. For many of us with chronic illnesses, there is only one option...get worse until you die. Most cancer patients get an outpouring of sympathy from family, friends, and society in general. Chronic illness patients get the things you listed here.

  • @Umbrellaoflove
    @Umbrellaoflove Před 6 lety +11

    My own family is like that. I have two chronic illnesses, as well as visually challenged and hearing impaired. My own grown up children say to me,”be positive, use your eyes and focus or you don’t look sick!!!”try homeopathic remedies or at least you have your legs!! I’ve heard them all from friends, family and I’m just sick of it. Lol!Those comments drive me around the bend!! That’s why I stick to myself and I don’t have friends because the ones I did have passed away and it’s hard to make friends when you’re older. I have one close friend but she lives in a different province.Love your video wish my kids could watch it or listen to it! Thanks for sharing❣️🇨🇦

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 6 lety +2

      Janet Wayne hey lovely, yes it can be super isolating due to having vastly different realities but know there is s whole community here to support you. Xx

  • @catloverKD
    @catloverKD Před 7 lety +9

    I have depression, anxiety, and an invisible disability and I swear the next person who tells me "happiness is a choice." and/or follows it up with some nonsense explanation of how or why that phrase "doesn't apply to mental illness" is going to be punched.

  • @franceswebster7616
    @franceswebster7616 Před 7 lety +3

    oh god...when someone mentions that they know "someone who died of that" ....great...yeah that's great...

  • @Miya2306
    @Miya2306 Před 8 lety +13

    I get, "sounds like you've got a bad cough. Oh, you're coughing again. You still coughing? You should quit smoking" 😓 I just smile and say "yes, I know. Thank you" 😊

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 8 lety +1

      +Miya2306 It depends what mood I am in as to how I repomd but usually like you have demonstrated haha - Lauren

  • @snowthewitch
    @snowthewitch Před 8 lety +8

    New to your channel but I love your videos so far. I'm suffering with gastroparesis and I can add to this "you're so dramatic" and "you're anorexic/bulimic" and THE WORST "you're just making yourself sick." The nerve of some people, man.
    Ever consider doing a "sick morning" routine? I have my own set of things I do to help myself feel better but I'm always curious what others do. BTW- You're an inspiration to us all, love.

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 8 lety +1

      +Snow Orchid thank you! eek 'your so dramatic'! Lucky we have each other to understand and remember to never doubt yourself. I will look into doing a 'Morning Routine' if you would like to see it although it would probably look a little boring haha. xxx

  • @emilydeaton1169
    @emilydeaton1169 Před 7 lety +8

    I adore your channel; I don't live with CF, but other chronic illnesses. It's nice to know I'm not alone. Thank you sharing your sense of humor! :) Wishing you well!

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 7 lety

      Thank you for being part of our little community on the internet. Hope you are the best you can be xx

  • @dheine121
    @dheine121 Před 8 lety +5

    Ha! This is a great list! My favorite one is about "just improve your diet and exercise and you will get better" (and thinner). I think my friends and family grow tired of me canceling plans when I wake up that day and feel awful. Last two days in a row had to reschedule Dr appt for migraine that lasted said 2 days. I don't think even doctors/schedulers believe me anymore!

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 8 lety +1

      +dheine121 Yes its hard to not doubt yourself when so many people around you do.

  • @evesmarshmallow663
    @evesmarshmallow663 Před 6 lety +3

    This is extremely relatable 😂
    Awesome video, as always!

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 6 lety +1

      Eves Marshmallow thank you lovely.

  • @balarina81
    @balarina81 Před 7 lety +3

    I have CF too and I am fed up when people telling me to think positive!!! And everything will be fine!!!😡😡😡

  • @sabserab
    @sabserab Před 7 lety +4

    Also a funny when you have an autoimmune disorder like lupus "You should boost your immune system" yeah right, makes me more ill but yeah.. Also the mailman today *looks behind me* "Oh who uses that walker" lolol - "Me" *cheerfully- made him look! duh. dumb comments everywhere. Your vid is so spot on!

    • @o.o4566
      @o.o4566 Před 7 lety

      sabserab I feel ya. Back injury and a lot of allergy related issues from dishydrotic eczema to psoriasis and angeodema attacks. People tell me to boost my immune system and I'm like... that's my issue it attacks everything. "Oh you were holding heat printed receipt paper... how about we cover your fingers in blisters because receipts are totally something dangerous" like... yah no thanks I don't need it doing that more. Or when they're like... "you're too young for back problems" yah I feel so too but that car that hit me in a crosswalk at 19 disagreed.

  • @egobuilders415
    @egobuilders415 Před 8 lety +4

    Actually, you SHOULD tell them to go see a naturopath AND an herbalist AND a nutritionist AND a chiropractor AND as many natural doctors as possible. If they say they are already doing those things then you know they will get better and completely heal, and then you can say, "Cool, let me know if there's anything I can do to help." Then tell them to avoid any medical doctors under the AMA who will only give them drugs to mask their symptoms while their organs slowly fail one by one.

  • @heatherbilly4223
    @heatherbilly4223 Před 6 lety +2

    Just found your channel. Subscribed 😃. Omg this is soo relatable! Esp. Starting at 1:12. I wish we could just switch bodies with people for a day..: or month, whenever they say something like this to you. And then say the same things to them, and only then will they understand what it's like to be in your body. They'd probably say something like- "How do you survive in this body?"

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 6 lety +1

      Heather Billy42 ah yes we can be an under appreciated bunch can't we?! Hope you are going be best you can

  • @gracieshepardtothemax1743

    I don't have CF. But I have chronic pain. Many many kidney, bowel and gynecological surgeries. This is soooooooo true!!!

  • @-unclebuck-
    @-unclebuck- Před 8 lety +3

    This is so correct. I have had pretty well all of those said to me.

  • @ericaobrien1317
    @ericaobrien1317 Před 7 lety +6

    My sister has a chronic illness and missed school a lot and people would ask me why she isn't at school and I say she was sick and they're like "how can she be sick that long??" 🙄 last year was her 7th grade year and she could only go to school part time. Only for certain classes. Is really hard for her. 😔

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 7 lety +1

      • Erica • it sounds very hard. I had to miss a lot of school too when I was that age (perhaps not as much as your sister) send her lots of love and cuddle for me. X

  • @stratojim473
    @stratojim473 Před 8 lety +6

    This was an enjoyable video, but all too sadly accurate haha :)

  • @misslilkev2
    @misslilkev2 Před 6 lety

    Had me rolling!!!! Have heard far too many of these! 😂😂

  • @sugading
    @sugading Před 8 lety +1

    GREAT video! PLEASE keep making video! They're great!!!

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 8 lety

      +sugading Thank you! I will keep on uploading so there is new one for every Thursday =)

  • @piccola8085
    @piccola8085 Před 8 lety

    Thank you for creating this clip and sharing it... It's great! You're so very talented!
    All your clips are great... And inspirational. Thank you, for you and everyone that contributed to your clips.
    Wishing you all the best.💫✨🌟

  • @thehausofmarina
    @thehausofmarina Před 7 lety +2

    thats exactly my life!!! kisses from a CF from Spain 😘

  • @lenagoodwin8223
    @lenagoodwin8223 Před 3 lety

    This has got to be the most engaging and fun to watch video on this topic. Great job! It sad though that these videos exist because it means people still don't understand chronic illness.

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před rokem

      Oh thank you! Sorry I’ve been off for a few years. It does suck that these are video being made but at least we can have a laugh

  • @agodservant1
    @agodservant1 Před 8 lety +2

    I have Dysautonomia and Gastroparesis. This is hilarious! Thank you!

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 8 lety

      +agodservant1 Glad you enjoyed. =) I hope your health isn't treating you too badly. You can follow me on Facebook facebook.com/rejectinglaurenrowe to keep updated with videos if you would like. x

    • @killmydreamdorothy8800
      @killmydreamdorothy8800 Před 4 lety

      Me too. 😢

  • @talonsage954
    @talonsage954 Před 7 lety +1

    I know this is an old video, but guts and insomnia has me strolling (Yes, STROLLING) through your videos in no particular order.
    This video makes me love you. Like a lot from, flaring insomniac in Michigan.
    Also, in my first comment to one of your videos, I assumed you were British.
    So sorry...it's the drugs, you know. 😜

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 6 lety

      oh hey, i am just scrolling through comments due to insomnia and found yours. Yeah i say blame the drugs for everything ;) and its not the first time someone has thought I was British so I take it as a compliment. xx

  • @TheBookDruggie
    @TheBookDruggie Před 6 lety +1

    My favorite, "Have you tried tumeric?"

  • @Jelleybean18
    @Jelleybean18 Před 3 lety

    Thank you for sharing!!

  • @Amanda-ks5mg
    @Amanda-ks5mg Před 7 lety +1

    EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON!!!!

  • @vall5074
    @vall5074 Před 6 lety +1

    it's like you are not gonna talk to people with this disease

  • @anAngelisHard2find
    @anAngelisHard2find Před 7 lety +1

    you are a brilliant young woman !!!!

  • @rogue_runaway
    @rogue_runaway Před 8 lety

    Love this so much 😄

  • @StarMama90
    @StarMama90 Před 8 lety +2

    this is so on point because sadly I've heard every single one of these at least 10 times...one I would like to add that doesn't apply to you is are you sure you're not just sick because you're fat? try explain to people that you're fat BECAUSE you are sick...now that's a whole separate video on its own lol

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 8 lety

      +Kourtni Pullen oh wow thats just a whole other level there isn't it. Lets hope we get some education out there. In the mean time I am sorry you have heard this bonus one. Head high my dear and remember you are not alone. xx

    • @dheine121
      @dheine121 Před 8 lety

      +Kourtni Pullen OMG so true! I do the treadmill every single day or walk my neighborhood and shop and clean and don't sit down many days and still not a pound budges. I cut out candy and junk for the most part, still there. Bugger!

  • @MNTayler
    @MNTayler Před 2 lety

    this is so spot on for me right now!

  • @alexachronister2526
    @alexachronister2526 Před 6 lety +1

    Hahah so true! We love this!

  • @hannermarie973
    @hannermarie973 Před 8 lety +1

    I get 'you take so many tablets, do you rattle' so many times! I also get really awkward looks when injecting in public >.

  • @hellobonjour9513
    @hellobonjour9513 Před 6 lety +1

    Bring food 😂 Yes !

  • @CaseyBradford
    @CaseyBradford Před 8 lety +4

    Lol, this is hilarious and so true!!

  • @terepi
    @terepi Před 6 lety +1

    “Push through it” is one I hate so much.

  • @macyshafer7777
    @macyshafer7777 Před 5 lety

    The most annoying one is the cancer, people at my school ask why I go to nurse for my meds and I tell them and they say well at least you don’t got cancer another one I know is when you tell someone about your cf and they say I got asthma

  • @ranchugoldfish3822
    @ranchugoldfish3822 Před 7 lety +1

    Bring food, lots of food.

  • @gigaziq3569
    @gigaziq3569 Před 7 lety +2

    I can relate to this alot

  • @nurnightz3275
    @nurnightz3275 Před 5 lety

    So true . That's what i want to hear

  • @deise.spoonie
    @deise.spoonie Před 7 lety +1

    awesome channel!!!

  • @boardingpass04
    @boardingpass04 Před 8 lety +1

    Well said I have a lung transplant too

  • @Lin171
    @Lin171 Před 8 lety +2

    Not necessarily with the bring food one depending on the chronic illness ;) if it's digestive there's a whole 'nother load of donts related to food activities. But loved the video!

    • @sophiam.krager3815
      @sophiam.krager3815 Před 6 lety

      i have a digestive c.i. and i eat what i want most of time even thought i know the after math

  • @joshuecanary
    @joshuecanary Před 8 lety +4

    ive got cystic fibrosis too but i would laugh at the rattle one xD

  • @Sixty_Five_Pronghorn
    @Sixty_Five_Pronghorn Před 6 lety

    I swear I hear these things at least 5 times when telling a stranger about my cystic fibrosis lmao

  • @lesliemyers7468
    @lesliemyers7468 Před 2 lety

    So true

  • @ThePancakeJedi
    @ThePancakeJedi Před rokem +1

    I’ve heard them all. Too many times.

  • @specialk3021
    @specialk3021 Před 8 lety

    It is cancer! Love throwing that back

  • @ConfusedGirlButSmartDude
    @ConfusedGirlButSmartDude Před 7 lety +1

    UGhh I FEEL YOU. I have a genetic disease called Neurofibromatosis and it sucks ass. I get these tons of times 😂

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 7 lety +1

      TransitioningGhoul if you want join the convo on the latest video about surviving a disaster film. Interested to see what your strategy would be 😝

  • @keric3673
    @keric3673 Před 7 lety

    'Bring food...lots of food' because pain meds make me crazy hungry

  • @kellypyle2603
    @kellypyle2603 Před 6 lety

    I don't have C.F. but my neice does and it makes me so sad to see her have to take all her pills.

  • @volleyballschlaeger
    @volleyballschlaeger Před 7 lety

    is there a desease that does the opposite of cystic fibrosis? then you can try to get this desease.

  • @Captdrax
    @Captdrax Před 5 lety

    lol omg im in chroinic pain u cracked me up lol good to luagh these days and rare

  • @astrid1870
    @astrid1870 Před 6 lety

    Don't necessarily agree with the Naturopath one. Some natural doctors can really help. Traditional doctors will send you from specialist to specialist until you're broke and still sick.

  • @isabellarose1200
    @isabellarose1200 Před 5 lety

    That's it..thats everything I've ever been told lmao

  • @annegodwin5619
    @annegodwin5619 Před 8 lety +4

    Absolutely brilliant!! Who is this woman -I need her as a friend!!

  • @HattielyEverAfter1995
    @HattielyEverAfter1995 Před 7 lety +3

    I have cf and if I'm in public and people start asking me why I take tablets I just tell them I'm a keen druggie x

  • @quiteanonymous7804
    @quiteanonymous7804 Před 8 lety +2

    Not a bad video, but as someone with fibro, alternative health treatments have helped me more than mainstream ones ever have.

  • @solveigst-juste6276
    @solveigst-juste6276 Před 5 měsíci

    Me who’s in a wheelchair and can’t feed myself (have a feeding tube) 👁️👄👁️

  • @void.null.1987
    @void.null.1987 Před 6 lety

    I do rattle, but more from EDS than pills. ;P

  • @ronaldmark2118
    @ronaldmark2118 Před 7 lety +1

    So how are you today? question do you think that being real sick in Australia is better more manageable than in other first world countries. in the state's in can be very difficult due to the beaucratic red tape. All the best. I am in a major medical center city, Philadelphia. I am blessed to have state Medicaid and very good access to excellent hospitals and physicians. even so just getting there after a poor nights or no nights sleep can be quite difficult.

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před 6 lety +1

      to be honest I don't know how to answer. We do have a wonderful medical system here but like any there are various flaws too. I have read up a little on other countries health systems but I think its one of those things that you would have to experience to be able to make a proper comparison..... was that diplomatic enough? haha sorry not too helpful.

  • @cherylvalk8968
    @cherylvalk8968 Před 3 lety

    I got the chemicals in farming for the last 100 years is the reason I have so many autoimmune diseases.

  • @amyellen3845
    @amyellen3845 Před 2 lety

    "Why don't you like bread?"
    "Oh, so you don't want to work."
    "Just one doughnut won't kill you."
    "You're still dieting?!"
    "Yea, I get stomach aches sometimes too."
    "Just don't think about the pain."
    "Why don't you want to have a baby?"
    The hits go on and on...

    • @GiftedLife
      @GiftedLife  Před rokem

      I mean really we could have done an hour version I’m sure

  • @AtlanticGiantPumpkin
    @AtlanticGiantPumpkin Před 5 lety

    ... but... Why did you say "Is that an STI" in a sexy voice? I think about that nightly.

  • @Gigicurls1
    @Gigicurls1 Před 8 lety +1

    this are usually what doctors say :/

  • @Sixty_Five_Pronghorn
    @Sixty_Five_Pronghorn Před 6 lety

    I swear I hear these things at least 5 times when telling a stranger about my cystic fibrosis lmao

  • @Gigicurls1
    @Gigicurls1 Před 8 lety

    this are usually what doctors say :/