10 Clues You Might Be a High-Masking Autistic

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  • čas přidán 29. 08. 2024

Komentáře • 664

  • @TV-8-301
    @TV-8-301 Před měsícem +131

    I've got to appreciate that you don't play background music. Just your chill voice and blissful silence

    • @xzonia1
      @xzonia1 Před měsícem +1

      I loved that too! I started my own CZcams channel (SolitaryWins) near the end of January where I post games of Solitaire and Minesweeper that I've won, and there's no sound on any of the videos. I already have 18 subscribers, and I keep wondering, are they all autistic too? X)

    • @BreezyBriest
      @BreezyBriest Před 3 dny +1

      Oh my. I relate to this. Great observation! I find that background music in these kinds of videos even if it's very faint and turned down is a huge distraction for me. I appreciate this as well.

  • @valval9277
    @valval9277 Před 3 měsíci +450

    I have found that those of us who understand humor and sarcasm tend to be wickedly hilarious. We can make almost anyone laugh with a mixture of blunt truth, colorful wording, and irony. I find this to be a common yet positive trait.

    • @Laura-gb1jv
      @Laura-gb1jv Před 3 měsíci +49

      I use this as part of my mask, actually. People tend to treat me with cool unease at first, but if I can make them laugh they'll often relax around me.

    • @valval9277
      @valval9277 Před 3 měsíci +3

      @@Laura-gb1jvsame!

    • @kimsherlock8969
      @kimsherlock8969 Před 3 měsíci +1

      Well put in a even temperament to not hurt but clarify.....?

    • @awkwardemily15
      @awkwardemily15 Před 3 měsíci +13

      I make people laugh and I don't know what was funny. I'm literally being honest and I can be passionate. It catches me off guard a bit since my intent wasn't to be funny at that moment.
      I like making people laugh though and I'm still trying to work out if that's me or a mask or a combo. As an example...
      Recently I was hanging on to something for someone else. That person was traveling with us for a school (college) conference but couldn't stay the whole time. When we got back, before getting off the bus one of the advisors asked if I was going to pass on those things to them. And I said "no, I want to keep them" in a sarcastic way because I wanted to make them laugh (and they did so it made me happy). I also thought it was funny they asked IF. Well of course I'm going to give you the stuff. What the heck am I going to do with it?

    • @kimsherlock8969
      @kimsherlock8969 Před 3 měsíci +4

      They laugh at your honest take on a subject
      People laugh at truth Hahaha Hahaha 😆

  • @belltowercollective7821
    @belltowercollective7821 Před 3 měsíci +413

    I can smell electric wire getting hot, 'saved' a local krispy kreme FACTORY I worked at when the display fridge plug started to heat up. I immediately stopped and made it important that we locate the source of the smell, and the manager found the hot cord right where I had stopped! Many other small talents and beautiful moments are thanks to this attention to detail!

    • @ChrisandDebby
      @ChrisandDebby  Před 3 měsíci +51

      Wow!! This is a great story! Thanks for sharing. Autistics don’t get the appreciation we deserve.

    • @demosthenes614
      @demosthenes614 Před 3 měsíci +48

      It never occurred to me until reading this that smelling wires getting hot isn't actually normal.

    • @alisonwhite9588
      @alisonwhite9588 Před 3 měsíci

      ​@@demosthenes614I hadn't realised this, either! I'd just thought others smelt it but ignored it!

    • @ZhovtoBlakytniy
      @ZhovtoBlakytniy Před 3 měsíci +19

      I've smelled them before too in my old house. People thought I was making it up or losing my mind.

    • @Alice_Walker
      @Alice_Walker Před 3 měsíci +16

      I had a similar "wait everyone can't smell that moment"... to me people I know smell different when they're sick. Not like I can sniff out cancer, but when they're coming down with the flu or something like that. They smell 🤷🏻‍♀️ just different to their usual self.

  • @ZhovtoBlakytniy
    @ZhovtoBlakytniy Před 3 měsíci +252

    I remember when I was a kid, my mom was putting me to sleep reading me a story and I told her she left the radio on. She couldn't hear it, but I told her the song that was playing. She went to check and the knob was just almost turned down all the way (just one more millimeter would have turned it off). She turned it up and the song I said I could hear was playing was on.
    Since then she says that I can "hear a mouse pee on cotton" 😂

    • @xzonia1
      @xzonia1 Před měsícem +2

      I'm always having to ask my family to turn the TV down because they can't even hear it but I feel like my ears will start bleeding any minute because it's so loud. I hated music growing up because it was always played too loud from car radios and boomboxes. Thank goodness for the invention of headphones and earbuds!

    • @tylerwill5250
      @tylerwill5250 Před 26 dny +1

      😂 i feel you. Telling mom or dad to turn down the tv was always a losing battle

    • @user-ww1bg7st2h
      @user-ww1bg7st2h Před 3 dny +1

      ​@@xzonia1same! People always say they can't hear the tv but then my head hurts and I can't enjoy the movie

  • @ebrush4669
    @ebrush4669 Před 3 měsíci +312

    I think a positive aspect of ASD is that im never bored. Everything is fascinating.

    • @Okcdriver
      @Okcdriver Před 3 měsíci +20

      Really? Everything is overwhelming to me

    • @SunshineGrove04
      @SunshineGrove04 Před 3 měsíci +24

      I feel the same way as the OP… but then I get super overwhelmed by how I am fascinated by everything.. then I burn myself out.. 🙃🫠

    • @lisareid7043
      @lisareid7043 Před 3 měsíci +4

      Me too!

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před 2 měsíci +16

      I very very rarely get bored. There is so much to learn.

    • @SunshineGrove04
      @SunshineGrove04 Před 2 měsíci +10

      @@Catlily5 right?? And the ‘worst’ part is that there is soo much more TO actually learn!!! Cue the overwhelm freeze response, ya know!

  • @davekronlund2361
    @davekronlund2361 Před 3 měsíci +259

    I am a retired police investigator. I sucked at personnel management, but excelled at crime scene investigation. I saw details, patterns and interpreted their relevance exceedingly well, it was like I could see it happening. I was called in from my time off regularly to examine the scenes of suspicious deaths and routinely assisted the coroner with minute examinations of the bodies more as a partnership because of this. I tried to share with subordinates what I was doing. I had extensive publications on the physical signs of homicide on human bodies and shared them in an effort to educate subordinate colleagues and emphasized the need to be observant of details. When they couldn’t do so, I considered it intellectual laziness. I was diagnosed with ASD after I retired and am making sense of this now at 63. Sadly, I have extensive PTSD from 31 years of policing and can’t help but wonder if my heightened sensitivity also heightened the trauma injuries.

    • @rsh793
      @rsh793 Před 3 měsíci +14

      They do say that we are good as detectives - so that would be really aligned with your experience :)
      Possibly yes in answer to your last question - I'm ASD and work with a lot of trauma sufferers with PTSD and many are ASD as well, thankfully the way I work is with horses rather than in the therapy room - and I have no problem with extreme honesty of course - but I have noticed that those with ASD have a more intense recollection of the experiences, partly because of the sensitivity, the memory and the pattern forming I think, than those who don't. To the best of my knowledge, it's not been something that's widely studied, probably will be in the future as more people come through and it's recognised more that we also have more instances of domestic violence, so the PTSD will be a more "regular thing" (sadly)
      But also - I don't know how long you've been retired, so it could also be a little bit related to that time that you have now to process some of the events - that can also be a sometimes thing that happens. Either way, just want to say, hope you can access a place that you can decompress those a bit - it's not nice living in that space.

    • @davekronlund2361
      @davekronlund2361 Před 3 měsíci

      @@rsh793 Thanks for your thoughtful and empathetic response. I have been retired since 2016. I am spending a considerable amount of my retirement focused on inner work. Identifying being on the spectrum only occurred by working closely with a psychologist who unknown to me, is an accredited ASD diagnostician. Everything makes more sense, actually absolute sense, viewed through an ASD lens. As I released that soft portion of my psyche, when I removed my mask, what emerged was very sensitive, childlike and autistic. Relating so much to the experiences of other ND people is therapeutic and validating.
      Thanks again for connecting.

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před 2 měsíci +8

      The same events tend to be more traumatic to autistic people than non-autistic people according to some studies.

    • @carryjgful
      @carryjgful Před 2 měsíci +5

      Are you Monk?? Jyst kidding...but his character is surely on the spectrum, besides his OCD & trauma traits which are accentuated im the series and sometimes cical. Because his skills are so good & his photographic memory for details his plle and staff work arnd his idiosyncracies abd cater to him becuz he is lovable and always means well(gets to & exposes the truth)

    • @peachanddaisygirls
      @peachanddaisygirls Před měsícem +3

      you are like Sherlock Holmes!

  • @Autistic_Goblin
    @Autistic_Goblin Před 3 měsíci +182

    Being AuDHD i have multiple interests that i cycle through. I don't have a single exclusive special interest, but i will switch between hyperfixations, but i will continue to passively collect ideas and information about the others at all times.

    • @julenewebb
      @julenewebb Před 3 měsíci +10

      Yes!! Me too!!

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před 2 měsíci +13

      I cycle through my interests as well. Some I return to more frequently than others. A couple I haven't gone back to. But most I do return to over and over.

    • @susanwhetstine1603
      @susanwhetstine1603 Před měsícem +6

      Thank you for articulating that. I do that, too.

    • @kyupiangel90
      @kyupiangel90 Před měsícem +7

      Same.
      My special interests are many, and sometimes i get overwhelmed by my own hyperfocus of weeks or days on end, put that specific one away for a while, and then pick another one of them, and rinse and repeat.
      I love drawing, i love astrology, i love learning new languages, i love fashion and subcultures, and i love singing or going on walks, but i always end up chasing the next one on the dopamine cycle of picking up old interests again bc i cannot function, like, at all, otherwise😂😂😂
      I really really need to pursue my passions and special interests, even if it is learning about all types of fungi or funky species of insects… or i feel stuck and enter adhd paralysis.
      And i can't do, like, nothing at all.

    • @___LC___
      @___LC___ Před měsícem +3

      Same…but tend to run concurrently and if something pops to me I will be stuck on researching that in any spare time. A special interest is medical information and how natural things work…which has led to saving lives (literally, because of course I’m stupidly detail oriented to the point my family thinks it neurosis, because they still don’t want to deal with having an autistic daughter or sister…and I’m 49, a lot of years of abuse) and designing systems based on how plants work and biochemistry. I didn’t look up how to design my water collection and watering system, I used knowledge of how the plants I was watering worked.

  • @user-nm3ug3zq1y
    @user-nm3ug3zq1y Před 3 měsíci +105

    Not being pulled in by group think as easily. More often keeping a detached analytical perspective when everyone else is already crowding behind flags.

    • @HerefortheLove
      @HerefortheLove Před 2 měsíci +10

      Wow! This explains my skepticism in the religion I was indoctrinated into. I am shunned when I don’t partake in group think so really messes with my wiring. 😅

    • @smukkejyde
      @smukkejyde Před 28 dny +2

      Yeah, while everyone else is firing up the torches, reaching for ropes and weapons - still being cool and "lets have a look at this situation and analyze it before we burn anything to the ground "..

    • @nathanxxvii
      @nathanxxvii Před 26 dny

      Y'know I keep having this argument with people "you wouldn't know what you would do in that situation."
      I assure you, Ami absolutely know what I would do. In my mind I have practiced for just this instance for decades.

    • @guitarsaremyfriendzzz7077
      @guitarsaremyfriendzzz7077 Před 19 dny +1

      ​@@HerefortheLovebruh... Are we....
      TwINsIeS?!?!
      Read in Deadpool voice.

    • @HerefortheLove
      @HerefortheLove Před 19 dny

      @@guitarsaremyfriendzzz7077 definitely twinkies!! Lol

  • @SindriMjolnir
    @SindriMjolnir Před měsícem +46

    The AuDHD combo is wild, let me tell you. I’ve got a rolodex of cycling special interests and cannot for the life of me be put in a box. This has resulted in my career as a freelance jack of all trades - and I mean that quite literally. I have a BFA in film making, I’m a professional illustrator, writer, actor, and a musician. I’m developing teaching materials for music theory, but I also have a license to drive a tour bus and lorries/big trucks. I do all these things simultaneously. I’ve got at least three projects going on at any given time, right now I’m juggling 6, because it’s the only way I can get anything done. I’m constantly procrastinating on at least one important project by working on another important project. When people ask me what I do for a living I try to mention only two or three of the things I’m doing, otherwise it gets to a point where it sounds like I’m lying 😅

    • @xzonia1
      @xzonia1 Před měsícem +3

      This makes me feel better. I'm not focused on one thing; I have multiple interests too that don't really coincide. Thanks for sharing!

    • @thesidneychan
      @thesidneychan Před 11 dny +1

      Basically, anything that can have its own subreddit is a potential special interest within that rolodex.

  • @bronsonjohnson9019
    @bronsonjohnson9019 Před 3 měsíci +165

    #1: I was at a pub and packing up my leftovers and the lid of the takeout container was plastic and the smoothest thing I have ever touched. The rest of my party didn’t seem to get why I was so enthralled by its extremely low coefficient of friction

    • @lindat7525
      @lindat7525 Před 3 měsíci +13

      Smoothness enthralls me TBH

    • @PhotonBeast
      @PhotonBeast Před 3 měsíci +7

      That does sound really enthralling. I'm kind of jelly!

    • @taylorthatwriter6865
      @taylorthatwriter6865 Před měsícem +6

      I was at work the other day and a plastic Cup I grabbed was incredibly smooth and silky almost! But no one else really understood why I was so enthralled by it either. And I kinda walked around with it for a bit playing with it. Haha

    • @vanessarae4746
      @vanessarae4746 Před měsícem +5

      I know exactly what youʻre talking about, certain plastic feels so smooth and soft, but is rigid and not slick at all, itʻs like the most microscopic velvet you ever felt, and that paired with itʻs particular luster is enthralling.

    • @monicaluketich6913
      @monicaluketich6913 Před měsícem +5

      I'm 68 years old and have never been diagnosed with autism, but I am realizing that out of your 10 signs, I think I have 8 or so. My memories are pictures, I have had many intense interests, but even if I get " caught up" in another interest, I still pick up on new info about older interests. I've had 2 teachers who told me that how I think through math or other subject problems seemed opposite to the way they would solve the problem, but we each would get the correct answer. Yes, I do have a high IQ and read a lot, but growing up in the 1960s, I had no chance to be given extra work or more advanced work. I was bullied from 7th grade to even as an adult in the workforce. If only I could have known about these abilities at that time, I wonder what my true potential could have been. (All of this because I thought about how much I like to sew, quilt, weave - the FEEL of fabric on my fingers!)

  • @I_am_Irisarc
    @I_am_Irisarc Před 3 měsíci +186

    Sticking to routines and patterns is why it makes me crazy when apps and suchlike get updates. I have to put everything back to as close as possible to the way it was.

    • @ChrisandDebby
      @ChrisandDebby  Před 3 měsíci +41

      Oh I lose it when my computer restarts and updates.

    • @batintheattic7293
      @batintheattic7293 Před 3 měsíci +6

      I don't loose it, per se, but I can feel the days when there have been updates barking at me to perform. I don't last as long on those days. So I try, as much as possible, to schedule the updates for just before I switch the things off for bed. 'Update and Shut Down' is a lot easier to cope with than 'Update and Restart'!
      But, yes, when something I've come to depend on (doing a thing a certain way) gets destroyed by an update - I am a very unhappy bunny. And I have, in the past, kicked up such a fuss about it (emailing huge corporations to shout at them etc.). I particularly hate it when computer apps are made more smart phone friendly to be more inclusive to the people that don't particularly care enough about the thing to remain static.

    • @duikmans
      @duikmans Před 3 měsíci +10

      Or when you get a new laptop at work (coz company policy). Stress levels only go down after setting everything up exactly like on the old laptop.

    • @danielaruhl1710
      @danielaruhl1710 Před 3 měsíci +8

      This! And when I have to change my devices … oh my. Bought a new phone 6 months ago, still using the old one, probably until it dies, because the new one is … well, different. 🙈😂

    • @I_am_Irisarc
      @I_am_Irisarc Před 3 měsíci

      @@danielaruhl1710 I so hear you. I needed a new phone because a combination of dyspraxia and rheumatoid arthritis had caused me to drop my old one too many times. I dreaded getting a new phone so much that I got on Amazon and bought one of the same model a second time. It was still a pain setting it up, but I knew where everything was and all the tricks and tips already.
      At this point, I'm just afraid that Android will stop serviving it. I won't really mind the lack of updates (see my first post), but apps may start failing, and I'll have to think about getting a new model. 😒

  • @kensears5099
    @kensears5099 Před 3 měsíci +100

    I'm my family's walking memory. When my father was dying I was overseas and my family urged me to come back quickly, not to see my father before he died (it was already too late for that; we'd seen each other before he slipped into his final coma), but because, as they told me, "Ken, you remember everything and there's so much information we need to gather and people we need to contact. Come home!"

    • @SunshineGrove04
      @SunshineGrove04 Před 3 měsíci +6

      I am the same way.. and the only people who don’t like it are my abusive family or ex abusive partners & ‘friends’ or sneaky co-workers. 🤷🏻‍♀️
      Can’t win’em all.. 😏

    • @nathanxxvii
      @nathanxxvii Před 26 dny +1

      That made me teary. You're amazing!

  • @LiftPizzas
    @LiftPizzas Před 3 měsíci +113

    I think the nonjudgmental thing comes from a place of evaluating things for their consequences, as opposed to the naturalistic/normalistic fallacy which seems to be the gold standard for allistics. (Which, let's be honest, is just mindless conformism.) Instead of "if it's not normal/popular/common it must be bad" the judgment is based on "does it hurt anyone or affect me in any way? No, then who cares?"

    • @northwoodfalls1403
      @northwoodfalls1403 Před měsícem +15

      Ya, that’s a great view of it. When the “non judgemental” bit came up, I was like, “Oh. I’m VERY judgemental. I feel like it’s my default setting.” But, ya. I judge irrationality. Most people bother me because their behaviours/opinions/actions are irrational or not rooted in some well thought out reasoning. They just run on automatic. I’m constantly muttering, “WHY would you do that? That makes no sense at all.” But if they’ve got a good reason for it, ok. I can’t be bothered by that. I actually love other peoples interests if they’re REALLY into it. Like, it might not be something I’d be interested in, it’s just their passion for it. They can tell you LOADS of info …. I never find it “weird”. It seems totally normal to me.

    • @qwmx
      @qwmx Před měsícem +3

      ​@@northwoodfalls1403I'm judgemental when they are not pragmatic.

    • @jliller
      @jliller Před měsícem +1

      @@northwoodfalls1403 Pretty similar with - both being intolerant of irrational behavior (as someone once said, I do not suffer fools gladly) and enjoying genuine passion in others.

    • @ZeonGenesis
      @ZeonGenesis Před měsícem +2

      It's like how I've noticed it's 'in' to decorate your home like clinical waiting rooms with absolutely no personality expressed, just because for some reason that's expected.. Hell naw, I'd rather explode in color and drown in "childish" things than feel forced to live in a half empty Ikea showroom for the rest of my life. I will judge, indeed :p.

    • @araisikewai
      @araisikewai Před 23 dny +1

      The non judgemental thing will clash very badly if you meet a narcissist.
      Most of the time I will be able to rationalize any kind of wrongdoing that people fell into. If someone mismanaged a project of some sort, I will try to find out where or why they might do so in the process without resorting to them having any ill will. Even though the end result doesn't bode well for them, I can always analyze that everyone started with good intentions.
      But if during our interaction I get a whiff that they are narcissist, then all bets are off and I will start any interaction with them with shields on. Narcissists are the very worst people you can meet if you're an autistic.

  • @lisbethchristensen1981
    @lisbethchristensen1981 Před 3 měsíci +60

    I just got my late autism diagnosis on the 22nd of may 2024. Just 8 days ago. I'm 43 years old. I'm forever grateful for autistic youtubers like you. It means the world to me. Thank you. 🏆❤

  • @senecarus_whitur
    @senecarus_whitur Před 3 měsíci +71

    Pattern recognition is the one thing that makes any situation I am in super fun, because I feel like I am constantly putting together a puzzle. It’s like a little challenge that I have for myself: Find the right piece and the right spot. It’s so satisfying when it fits.

  • @consuelonavarrohidalgo5334
    @consuelonavarrohidalgo5334 Před 3 měsíci +62

    It's great knowing that there are benefits of being autistic. I'm wishing to be able to open my mind. All I hear about is negative.

    • @joelgrea6654
      @joelgrea6654 Před 3 měsíci +10

      Autism should never had been considered a handicap : it's a different brain architecture (actually 2, one with more connection per neuron than a neurotypic brain, one with less). For certain tasks, like pattern recognition, the one with much more connection is much more efficient than a neurotypic brain. For others task, it is much less efficient. Same for the architecture with less connection per neurons.
      You should look to a video called "Autism: The new view. The world is disordered" by "Neurodivergent Doctor", a youtuber who is both Neurodivergent and a clinician working with autists.

    • @ruthhorowitz7625
      @ruthhorowitz7625 Před 3 měsíci

      Social media focuses on negatives because it creates more clicks.

    • @ruthhorowitz7625
      @ruthhorowitz7625 Před 3 měsíci +2

      ​@@joelgrea6654true but we do need accommodations so we can perform at our best. I don't know how old you are but it gets harder as you get older.

    • @InterDivergent
      @InterDivergent Před 3 měsíci +6

      The negatives are often focused on, especially by newly diagnosed Autistics, because that is all that is focussed on when making a diagnosis. It is a draining process, traumatic even. They could do with adding some positives in there, or at the very least spinning those negatives into positives.

    • @Okcdriver
      @Okcdriver Před 3 měsíci

      @@InterDivergent my diagnosis was just a drawn out sad story of hopelessness.

  • @CoryAlbrecht
    @CoryAlbrecht Před 3 měsíci +41

    At the point where you contrast hyperfocus for ADHD versus autism, it made me think about how my ADHD and autism conflict with each other. I have that autistic hyper focus butt like an ADHD person I flit from one hobby to the next leaving a swath of unfinished projects while at the same time being incredibly scientifically and computer literate for decades.😂
    Maybe you could do a video on how ADHD and autism conflict like that?

    • @seacrest73
      @seacrest73 Před měsícem +1

      You sound like my sister 😂

    • @itsdokko2990
      @itsdokko2990 Před měsícem +2

      Omg that's just like my life.
      i hyperfixate on everything to a point my mind just gets tired and i become a walking automaton. The process repeats until i find something to fixate into. I'd be cool to have a brain activity switch.

  • @ds.laetitia
    @ds.laetitia Před 3 měsíci +53

    Pattern recognition... That can explain why while crossing the train station in Cologne, I spotted a pickpocket in action and ended up getting the police instead of eating with my ADHD husband and daughter, who didn't notice I wasn't following them anymore.

    • @batintheattic7293
      @batintheattic7293 Před 3 měsíci +4

      You wandered off in hot pursuit :D . And nobody noticed... :(

    • @LiftPizzas
      @LiftPizzas Před 3 měsíci +2

      Your husband and daughter didn't notice? (Wait, recognizing ambiguity wasn't listed as one of the things, was it?)

  • @TammyMackie
    @TammyMackie Před měsícem +20

    At my age, early 60's, learning that I have autism is helping me understand the reason I was treated the way I was growing up, my adult years, etc. I never got to actually have a 'normal' life.

    • @amylynnbakes
      @amylynnbakes Před měsícem +1

      😢🤗same here

    • @xzonia1
      @xzonia1 Před měsícem

      53 here. Same. At least now I understand why I'm not "normal." It's good to know.

    • @amylynnbakes
      @amylynnbakes Před měsícem

      @@TammyMackie I had a sister a year older than me. She was treated so different than me in school, at home and playing with friends. The friend thing sucked more than anything.

    • @northofyou33
      @northofyou33 Před 18 dny

      Same here, though I doubt I will ever be diagnosed. I'm too old, and I don't live in the USA.

  • @KickStarrs
    @KickStarrs Před měsícem +17

    Growing up i was notorious for remembering random facts about people or random things that they said years back. It would blow their minds if very single time.

  • @mardasman428
    @mardasman428 Před měsícem +22

    Yes! I have been called non-judgemental so often that I have been the go-to-guy whenever there was some deep talk about a deep personal problem that needed to be addressed, so I am kind of a therapist for people and I love it. People trust me with their deepest fears, their deepest issues, their problems, but they know that I'm not the guy they want to go to whenever they want to feel distracted, they only go to me if they have issues and not if they are happy. I am fine with that, but it also has the negative side-effect that I tend to attract people with a lot of problems that I feel obligated to solve and that has led me into some serious co-dependent relationships.

    • @Claire-tk4do
      @Claire-tk4do Před měsícem +2

      Oof, I feel you buddy. One such friend took up so much of my time and energy in college; not maliciously, and truly trying and succeeding in getting better not being like totally toxic, but... It's been a struggle with him nonetheless. He definitely has strong codependent tendencies, which I enabled slightly more than I should have perhaps, though I did maintain some okay boundaries and sense of self it was kind of stretched and led to more enmeshment than I would have liked

  • @marxmeesterlijk
    @marxmeesterlijk Před měsícem +9

    contrary to the stereotype about autistic people, in my experience many of us are highly sensitive and empathic.

  • @cris_miko
    @cris_miko Před 3 měsíci +30

    I am learning so much about myself from your videos. In my 70s now, I had no opportunity for diagnosis before, and now its gaslighting to contend with.

    • @ChrisandDebby
      @ChrisandDebby  Před 2 měsíci +2

      Thank you so much for your support and for being here! So glad to hear that the videos are helpful for you, but that is so challenging for you to not know for so long, and I can imagine the challenges of diagnosis for you. Really hope that the next generations have more access to better information, and it helps to hear about all the experiences of adults who were undiagnosed. Also to know that we're all not alone, even if we felt that way for our whole lives before - along with being misunderstood.
      Really appreciate you being here and sharing this and being part of our community! And thanks again for your support of what we're doing - hope we get to hear more from you here!

  • @alicewright9784
    @alicewright9784 Před 3 měsíci +28

    Im 18 and just starting my diagnosis journry in france. I have been researching autism since covid. I am the best at recognising patterns in my family. I have been in the same school now for 4 years. From the second day i realised that the bell (a clip of music a lot better than a loud ring) always rang 2 minutes early than the time that they said it would. In september a new teacher came and was confused by the bell ringing at the wrong time. No one else could explain it. Its amazing how much neurotypical people miss out on.
    I wasnt even trying to find it either i just noticed it.
    Ill keep you updated on my diagnosis journey.
    One of my teachers that came in later has an autistic son and recognised it in me. This school year she has allowed me to stim when necessary. She also allows anyone to get up when needed. 5 minutes i to a lesson i ended up laying on a table. Thanks to her i told my mum and we started the process.
    The wall paper on the school walls feels and looks amazing. There are little circles with lines going vertically to connect them and each row is staggered. It feels good to run my fingers along it. Also looking through the gaps in a fence when i am walking

  • @eratonysiad2582
    @eratonysiad2582 Před měsícem +7

    #8 is so real. After I visited the new home of a "friend" of mine, he decided to explode and told me he finds me absolutely insufferable for what boils down to being autistic, and especially everything you talked about there. It really sucks to no longer be on speaking terms with someone I've considered my best friend for so long, but someone who can barely tolerate me is no friend at all.

  • @F00tsie
    @F00tsie Před 3 měsíci +29

    I LOVE designing homes, apartments, tiny houses, stores. I have probably thousands of floor plans at this point. I enjoy designing entire towns as well. I learned about blueprints for floor plans when my dad was building my grandparents home, and have been interested in it ever since. Its so fun.

    • @vickiamundsen2933
      @vickiamundsen2933 Před měsícem

      SO much fun... it's like putting a puzzle together, but the pieces are flexibly shaped and sized!

    • @monicaluketich6913
      @monicaluketich6913 Před měsícem +3

      I spent 8 years designing the house I now live in. I'd had no training in home design, but I knew what I wanted and taught myself various software packages (as capabilities were added). I gave the plans to a contractor and his team built it. I am now finishing up building a goat barn (12ft x 24ft) by myself. I designed and built it over a period of 3 years, as I figured out how to do a particular part, the hot weather that I can't tolerate well, and my 'advanced' years.

    • @F00tsie
      @F00tsie Před měsícem +1

      @@monicaluketich6913 That is SO COOL! What software would you recommend?

    • @monicaluketich6913
      @monicaluketich6913 Před měsícem

      @F00tsie I don't known any of the new ones. I started with AutoCad ver.1! There should be s/w that has house and garden/landscaping design build in together.

  • @camerafishingcountry6903
    @camerafishingcountry6903 Před měsícem +8

    I've spent years avoiding hyperfocus unless completely alone, bcus of how much it hurts being pulled out of it by someone wanting my attention or expecting me to do something for them, even though they can or should be able to see I'm busy/not even present. That's one of the many reasons I am a hermit, bcus I can hyperfocus on my passions in peace. People are exhausting.

  • @upsidedown1972
    @upsidedown1972 Před měsícem +9

    Clothing tags will send me into an almost insanity. I have nearly wrecked a car because i was trying to rip a shirt tag out. The flip side is that i can feel the difference between every grit level of sanded surfaces. Im a fine furniture carpenter.
    Also, the smell of laundry can either be heaven or hell. If i smell the musty thing feom clothes that sat in the washer even a few minutes too long, i go bonkers. And it freaks me out because nobody else can smell it.

  • @ashextraordinaire
    @ashextraordinaire Před 2 měsíci +5

    I have no idea why the algorithm recommended your video, but good lord, you just described my entire life. I've always been an extreme introvert, "too sensitive", and an absolute nerd about my niche interests. Now I wonder if there's a reason behind all of that.

  • @merenwen_kiltæsir
    @merenwen_kiltæsir Před 3 měsíci +39

    I have a rubbish memory for everything but random stuff 😕 I walk in a place and suddenly I remember what audiobook I was listening last time I was there… or some moments in the past, what they did say to me, what were they wearing, what place, the day of the week, and the weather there was 😅😅 I don’t know if it’s odd or normal 😅

    • @BPLdenver
      @BPLdenver Před 3 měsíci +6

      I have the same memory traits. It's a battle between wanting novel experiences and automatically connecting old experiences to the "new."

    • @robinhoward5987
      @robinhoward5987 Před měsícem

      Yes! I totally do that, even decades later.

    • @gorehammer1
      @gorehammer1 Před měsícem +1

      I can’t remember what I did 5 minutes ago but I can disassemble an engine, put it in a box and come back years later and effortlessly reassemble it remembering the location of every nut and bolt.

    • @itsdokko2990
      @itsdokko2990 Před měsícem

      My short term memory is beyond abysmal, i have no shame in admitting it xD.
      Yet, im able to remember things that happened on a random fųcking day where nothing remotely important happened and i will tell you anything. Dont even get me started with aviation and car mechanics.

    • @simonanardi4312
      @simonanardi4312 Před měsícem

      😄 I often experienced it the other way round: I listen to a program on the radio while walking or driving, and if I happen to listen to the same thing once again I will remember exactly where I was while they were saying this or that…

  • @sweetdream242424163
    @sweetdream242424163 Před 3 měsíci +25

    Can relate to so much of this. I love recognising patterns and have crazy attention to detail which comes in handy with my work as sometimes it really does come down to the detail. I can notice when someone looks different and they’ve shaved, had a haircut, changed their glasses, even when no one else seems to notice these things. I love to get right into the details, very much a bottom up thinker, if I don’t understand the details then the bigger picture doesn’t make any sense. Sometimes it’s a challenge and sometimes it’s a real gift. It’s nice to feel seen and validated❤

    • @abomb9299
      @abomb9299 Před 3 měsíci

      Noticing haircuts, especially when the haircut is minor, especially in women

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před 2 měsíci

      I am the opposite. I often don't notice haircuts.

  • @greenliter1
    @greenliter1 Před 3 měsíci +13

    Does anyone else love photography for pattern recognition and balance reasons? I love photography and I just started putting together a scrapbook recently…it brings me so much joy to find the perfect flow and visuals…❤

  • @CinkSVideo
    @CinkSVideo Před 3 měsíci +25

    I spent most of my childhood having spoiled food shoved in my face because I could detect a day before everyone else. My mother used me to check food.

  • @TinnaMinor
    @TinnaMinor Před měsícem +8

    Note on #10, I remember that when I was in college, I spent a lot of time with people that I disliked for various reasons, like gossip and gross habits. I sat down with myself and wondered why it was that I disliked these people, if I told people why I disliked them, would that make me a bully? I knew bullying is (usually) a learned behavior of copying things other people do, but how did people choose what traits were worth bullying? I was really only making conclusions with my own experiences as data; but I decided that my hatred towards certain traits (and maybe other people as well) was because I have these traits too, and I'd been subconsciously taught to be ashamed of them. Therefore bullying was an act of lashing out in self hatred when other freely express these traits they are ashamed of, though it's probably subconscious. So I should be open and respectful of other people despite my discomfort, because there was a good chance that the people around me were going through the same thing...
    Of course as time passes and it becomes increasingly clear that I am incredibly neurodivergent, a lot of my internal data has a bunch of asterisks on it and I'm constantly fact checking with others.
    Ramble over.

  • @Maggie.can.hug.every.cat.
    @Maggie.can.hug.every.cat. Před měsícem +5

    The combination of high masking autism and trauma makes me notice literally every small detail, especially details pertaining to people and social interactions. Put something down an hour ago and now can't find it? I know where you put it. I know your coffee preference. I remember every detail from every conversation we have ever had. Im a social worker, and I hold a case load of about 30 people and families. I know the details of every single one of them, their circumstances and needs and barriers, things they have said, it is all in my head.
    I can overhear any conversation in the office and I am also sometimes able to predict the future based on my observations of peoples behaviours or conversations.

    • @ChrisandDebby
      @ChrisandDebby  Před měsícem

      This is awesome that you’re able to identify positives from your difficult past experiences. I bet you’re a fantastic social worker! That’s a really tough job by the way so good for you 🙌

    • @Maggie.can.hug.every.cat.
      @Maggie.can.hug.every.cat. Před měsícem +1

      @ChrisandDebby as much as I joke that social in any form is work, i love it, and have noticed a huge amount of ND colleagues. Our strong sense of justice and creative thinking (we can usually find some kind of loophole or creative solution to most problems) and considering there are more women, we usually have mastered masking and can see through others masks, and perfectly modulate our own masks to provide what is needed in any given situation.
      Like a lot of people have said, these traits are so helpful in so many ways, but also so exhausting, and sometimes it would be nice to switch my brain off, or just quiet it a little.

  • @alisonwhite9588
    @alisonwhite9588 Před 3 měsíci +9

    The moving wallpaper. 😲 I remember telling my mum about that in my auntie's house, but she told me it was just my imagination!

  • @roxymovie3938
    @roxymovie3938 Před 3 měsíci +39

    1. Fixation on details 🧐 🪡
    2. Diving into deep passions 🏊
    3. Thinking in pictures 🖼
    4. Super high senses 👂👃👀👅🙌
    5. Hyperfocus 👁👁
    6. Good memory 🧠
    7. Recognizing patterns 🎢
    8. Being overly honest 💛
    9. High IQ 🎯
    10. Very tolerant & mindful❣
    11. Exellent dry situational humor 😅
    12. Special non-verbal communication skills for animals 🐈 and nature 🌿
    13. Very good at recognizing vibes 🔥⚡❄ (positive or negative energy in the air) besides from # 4
    14. Very good at expressing emotions through all kind of arts 🌈
    15. Due to # 4 good recognition about changes in our body (when not being at # 5) and are more driven to take alternative medicine from nature (I often know intuitive which plant 🌱 I need to take)
    16. Very creative - with all kind of stimmings 🤸‍♀️🤹🛀
    17. Able to see far beyond the horizon 🌠 because we can be lost in space and time
    18. More awake because we need less sleep 😇
    19. Good thinkers because our brains are always running and in action 😁
    20. Very resilient 💪because every day is a new challenge for us and we have already mastered so much in a life that was not built for us
    21. Very modest 👣 because our brains don't focus on superiority, novelty and exitement
    22. Good teachers 👩‍🎨 for we know what is essential in life 😊

    • @drivers99
      @drivers99 Před 3 měsíci +2

      Are 11-22 from another video?

    • @roxymovie3938
      @roxymovie3938 Před 3 měsíci +1

      @@drivers99 No, 11-22 are not from another video but my thoughts from my brain to add more clues to the list 😊

    • @enbiez
      @enbiez Před 3 měsíci +7

      Cool addition and a lot of them are probably common, but as with some in the video, some of them are also commonly the opposite for other autistics, such as the sleep one😅 I wish i didnt need as much sleep butt ive generally always needed more sleep than others :)

    • @roxymovie3938
      @roxymovie3938 Před 3 měsíci +5

      @@enbiez Thanks for your kind response, Riah. Lots of us have sleeping issues of all kinds. Speaking for myself I have always been a night owl, as a child because of anxiety and terrible nightmares and as an adult consiously chosen because it's the only time somehow quiet and I enjoy the silence to be more creative. - During my 20-30 yrs. I had terrible sleeping issues and sometimes I only slept 1 or 2 hours and then had to go to work. - When a day has been very overwhelming, my body needs of course more rest. I would say it's good that you need more sleep because it's at least healthier 😉

    • @mehow357
      @mehow357 Před 3 měsíci +3

      ​@@roxymovie3938 looks like a lot from the list is also applicable to ADHD. Those are distinct spectrums, but share a lot of common traits.

  • @kathrynbsouth
    @kathrynbsouth Před 3 měsíci +29

    As a side note, I belong to the small percentage who, instead of thinking in mental imagery, have NO mental imagery. It's called aphantasia. I have no ability to 'see' things in my mind. My 'visual' memory consists of lists of details about a person or object. For instance, I can't picture my mother, but I can describe her features in minute detail because I've memorized what she 'looks' like. This is where the attention to detail is a plus. On the other hand, if I'm in a new environment, my need to memorize it in the form of word lists gets really overwhelming really quickly.

    • @lemurkirsche7891
      @lemurkirsche7891 Před 3 měsíci

      Do you see the list then as one Page/List or multiple shorter pages, or one page per Room, Person, and so on?
      I do not have Aphantasia. I remember everything in Pictures, either still Pictures, multiple Pictures or often also moving Pictures and even in form of a Video/film.
      And with this together; When I think of a Room, I see how it looked in different stages (multiple Visits) and my Words of thoughts I had at every time i was in these Rooms. This is also with every time I saw a Person, or Area of a Street and more.
      It is very hard to forget how something looked like, which makes it worse when you saw something very uncomfortable.

    • @camellia8625
      @camellia8625 Před 3 měsíci

      I have aphantasia too affecting all senses bar internal speech

    • @heidiyoung1508
      @heidiyoung1508 Před 2 měsíci

      I have aphantasia and no other inner senses - sound, touch, smell, etc. Interestingly, I have heightened external senses - smells, lights, sounds, etc. which mean that I notice and remember all sorts of things.
      I’m also great at design and art. Visual memories aren’t needed to do well in creative fields.

    • @justkibby5959
      @justkibby5959 Před měsícem

      Same. The best I can do is conceptual outlines of images but I have to concentrate really hard to make that happen.

  • @JH-tb5zc
    @JH-tb5zc Před 3 měsíci +9

    One manifestation of my passions is Pokémon. When I play a new version or go back to play an older version I spend days plotting out the perfect team, I study every aspect of each animal, type, look, stats, etc. and come up with the “best” team, (fun teams, emotional teams, difficult teams, rare teams, etc.). Playing the actual game is secondary to me vs the team building, I am way more excited about the time researching. My passion isn’t the game, it is researching and finding every possible combination and pattern.

  • @ivanaamidzic
    @ivanaamidzic Před 3 měsíci +11

    Yes, being autistic like me has many perks. I have skills, insights and abilities than many neurotypical people only wish they had!

  • @titoToucan
    @titoToucan Před 3 měsíci +10

    On that last point about being nonjudgmental, I think part of it for me comes from being blind to what is often considered “socially acceptable” by my peers. I’ve never minded listening to the opinions of others regardless of how unpopular they are, as long as they don’t cross my own moral lines and into being downright cruel and malicious. I approach everyone with respect and understanding, because that’s what I would have wanted for myself. And in any interaction with anyone, I’m always tend to be rather blind to their intentions in the moment because I’m usually not paying much attention to their body language or their subtle changes in tone. I pay more attention to the content of what they’re saying than the way they’re fidgeting their thumbs or the subtle change in their facial expression.
    On one hand, this lack of judgment has often led me into being manipulated over the years without me realizing it until way after the fact. But it’s also wonderful because I can go into a conversation with just about anyone without any prior judgment of them, leading me to see the inherent good in just about anyone without any prior judgement based on superficial things like appearance or body language. And I’m left after every good interaction I have feeling a certain sense of wonder from the contents and depth of what was discussed, of being able to learn something new about someone else, or simply from having had such a great time with them.
    Anyways, if you took the time to read my own little observation about things, thanks for reading, and I hope you have a great day/night! :)

  • @jenavasexton1645
    @jenavasexton1645 Před 3 měsíci +9

    My grandma was having dinner with my uncle for her 90th birthday. After sitting quietly for a few mins she tell my uncle how many bricks there are in the exposed wall behind him. 😂 it's heritable, you say?

  • @julikelley4706
    @julikelley4706 Před 14 dny +2

    Look I never comment, but here goes nothing.
    I have come to suspect that I have ASD in a "high fuctioning" kind of way.
    This video brought tears of being seen and pain of just now really starting to realize and so many other things. I am so glad that content like this is here.
    From a very deep place, Thank you.

  • @squigglymilton1312
    @squigglymilton1312 Před 10 dny +1

    Soon as you went from “hightened senses” to *animals*
    After talking about “life saving”
    I remembered we had a hand in the advent use of therapy animals roles in our society

  • @danielaspitz3052
    @danielaspitz3052 Před měsícem +6

    At 42 I came across the term HSP and looking back at my childhood, I was sure I am an HSP. In my mid 30s I was in a relationship with an autistic man for five years and in all of the tests I took, I scored higher on the spectrum than him. But I dismissed the idea for the usual reasons. Two months ago I had an unusal event happening in my life and I just knew that I'm autistic. Patterns, colours, smells, I love Architecture (Bauhaus!) sounds, how things feel- I've always been extremely moved by things I like, they trigger me as if I was high (I never did drugs), wheras tasts, smells, sounds, colours I dislike or ugly, grey and dirty places, get me to a really low point or even depressed

  • @maidofcornwall
    @maidofcornwall Před 3 měsíci +16

    Thank you so much for showing the positive side of autistic traits. I think we all get fed up of hearing about the negative side of them.
    I don't know if this is an actual autistic thing or not, but I can find things really easily. I have heard it described by using the phrase "Needle in a haystack," where an autistic person will say "what haystack?" That's just like me! Maybe it's the attention to detail side of things where we can see the detail of the needle really easily.

    • @batintheattic7293
      @batintheattic7293 Před 3 měsíci +2

      I'm much better at finding things if I don't know they're even there. That sounds completely inverted, doesn't it! I mean, for instance, if I get put in a field full of wads of sheep wool - I can spot the mushroom quite quickly. I'm in my element in the autumn! Spotting brown things that aren't fallen leaves amongst all the brown fallen leaves.
      If I know that a thing should be around here somewhere (like the scissors) - I'm not very good at that.

    • @ZhovtoBlakytniy
      @ZhovtoBlakytniy Před 3 měsíci +1

      My daughter is ADHD and I always have to find things for her. We call it "mom powers".

    • @InterDivergent
      @InterDivergent Před 3 měsíci

      Also sounds like pattern recognition, or perhaps negative pattern recognition, if that's even a thing. Like those 'spot the differences' games.

  • @booker5606
    @booker5606 Před měsícem +4

    I’m sorry, I had to pause the video after that story about absorbing and incorporating the hotel design at home because that is the coolest thing I’ve ever heard.

  • @susannunemaker4262
    @susannunemaker4262 Před 3 měsíci +20

    Is one trait never being bored? There’s always something going on in my head. I’ve been told I think too much. Also what about liking to read non-fiction exclusively?

    • @PhotonBeast
      @PhotonBeast Před 3 měsíci +2

      That would likely fall under 'having a rich inner world' and yes, I believe that's one possible trait. The fiction/non-fiction part, not sure, though that potentially could fall under a special interest, desire for particular (mental) stimulation, or just personal preference :)

    • @Okcdriver
      @Okcdriver Před 3 měsíci +2

      @@PhotonBeast I can read an encyclopedia I used to be punished as a school boy and write out the dictionary. Didn’t bother me. lol

    • @Catlily5
      @Catlily5 Před 2 měsíci

      I think preferring non-fiction is more common in autistic people.

  • @Jeremus717
    @Jeremus717 Před 3 měsíci +4

    There are a Fair number of other advocates on other channels who have made me feel validated and made sense of what's going on with me as a late diagnosed autistic person in my forties. But there are zero channels where I feel the same sense of identification as when I watch you. You say so many of the things that I also think, and bring up a lot of the experiences that I'm only now realizing are not what everyone else is going through. I can't overstate how much I appreciate the work you do.

  • @markdeffebach8112
    @markdeffebach8112 Před 3 měsíci +13

    the problem with remembering old science information is that it get replaced with better information as science progresses.

    • @vickiamundsen2933
      @vickiamundsen2933 Před měsícem +3

      ah, but that just adds to the fun of telling the young ones "can you believe, when I was in high school they taught us..."

    • @monicaluketich6913
      @monicaluketich6913 Před měsícem +2

      I am a retired science teacher. Yes, the world and all the info has changed since elementary school in the 1960s!

    • @vickiamundsen2933
      @vickiamundsen2933 Před měsícem

      @@monicaluketich6913 remember how they told us the electron goes around the nucleus like a planet orbiting a sun? I mean, even in 1970 that had been proven wrong. Still cheeses me off.

  • @patriciasadlertrainor6771
    @patriciasadlertrainor6771 Před 3 měsíci +16

    My husband is autistic and I am ADHD. I see many of these traits in him and also many in me. Seems like there are overlaps.

    • @inuchan74
      @inuchan74 Před 3 měsíci +6

      Yes there are a lot of overlapping traits!

    • @abomb9299
      @abomb9299 Před 3 měsíci +3

      An enormous minefield of overlapping similarities!

    • @topsyturvygirl
      @topsyturvygirl Před 3 měsíci +1

      Definitely a lot of overlap- hyperfocus, iq, high energy, sensory powers…

    • @jliller
      @jliller Před měsícem +1

      It's about half overlap, half opposites.

  • @Tilly850
    @Tilly850 Před 3 měsíci +7

    Great list. Yes, the super hearing. I can hear amazingly well even as an older person. And being honest really hits me as something that caused me a lot of difficulty. Non-autistic people really don't like it. I never could understand why they weren't. It just didn't make sense to me and was a big part of why I felt so different all my life. That and seeing the patterns to the point where I often feel psychic, but it's just a matter of seeing all the pieces and knowing how the puzzle will look.
    I also can see the result before it's finished...in my mind. Design has always interested me too.

  • @BanFamilyVlogging
    @BanFamilyVlogging Před 3 měsíci +17

    *Being judgmental comes from a place of insecurity, & isn’t unique to any neurotype.*
    I’ve seen plenty of judgmental behavior demonstrated by Autistic people, & I myself was pretty judgy in some ways before I worked through my own emotional trauma.
    Haha, I definitely didn’t consider myself judgmental back then, though. It was only in areas that were connected to my trauma that I had stuff to work through.

    • @BanFamilyVlogging
      @BanFamilyVlogging Před 2 měsíci

      @ReiSutoikku haha it’s just as anecdotal as attributing judginess to any one neurotype is

  • @Kali_Yugahhhh
    @Kali_Yugahhhh Před 3 měsíci +3

    11:52 ....because they don't want us working for the other side. 💖

  • @demosthenes614
    @demosthenes614 Před 3 měsíci +16

    Ugh the sense of smell is so annoying sometimes.
    I often smell the tiny smell of gas when a gas dryer/furnace stops and the motor turns off and a tinnnny amount of gas exhaust doesn't vent perfectly. It makes me wonder how awful I'd experience the smell if it was an actual gas leak or something more significant!

    • @lindat7525
      @lindat7525 Před 3 měsíci +1

      I just call myself "nosy". I did once have an actual gas leak outside and hubby didn't believe me.

    • @jliller
      @jliller Před měsícem +1

      I hate many smells most people find pleasing, such as coffee and tea and just about all perfume/cologne.

    • @judirollings3959
      @judirollings3959 Před měsícem +1

      And all along I thought I was just a person with multiple chemical sensitivities. I have had usual ability to smell since I was a child. My mother scolded me frequently for smelling my food before I would taste it - "bad manners!". When I was working in an office in east central North Carolina, I smelled smoke outside. No one else could smell it. I called the city fire department to ask if there was a fire in the area - they said No, but 3 people in the city had called with the same question. That night on TV there were news stories about a forest fire in Kentucky - mystery solved!

    • @maybemablemaples2144
      @maybemablemaples2144 Před 14 dny

      I was the only one who noticed a gas leak in my building, and I could pinpoint the exact place where it was. It also stopped the annoying sound coming from the furnace, too.

  • @gaylynyoung6387
    @gaylynyoung6387 Před 3 měsíci +5

    Ha! I did an aptitude test once. Architect and designer were top of the list. I love thinking about how to design things.

    • @vickiamundsen2933
      @vickiamundsen2933 Před měsícem +1

      in high school, mine said math/electronics/chemistry. I became a programmer. Logic rules!

    • @gaylynyoung6387
      @gaylynyoung6387 Před měsícem +1

      @@vickiamundsen2933Sadly i ended up with a BA and a law degree. When I went to university females were far and few between in science (friend of mine was so harassed she switched to languages), engineering and architecture. I actually wanted to take acting (great masking skills here) but the high school councillor lied and said I couldn’t in first year.
      Anyway, I hated law and ended up never practicing. I was a legal editor for a human rights publication (we published decisions). That was at least interesting.
      Retired now and finally enjoying life completely. I take musical theatre classes! 😂

  • @wesleyellis8805
    @wesleyellis8805 Před měsícem +12

    The hyper-vigilance is a superpower for work, but sometimes I wish I could stop fixating on how many overhead lights are out at a business 😅

  • @jeoffreywortman
    @jeoffreywortman Před 2 měsíci +3

    People, especially neurotypical people won't quit judging.
    It's part of then autistic experience to be disliked. The sooner you embrace it, the sooner your sensibility will yield, and the sooner life will become more endurable.
    Neurotypicals hate feeling weirded out, and autistic people weird them out. The good part is that if you quit masking, and someone actually like you, very probably they genuinely feel for you.
    As autistics.we need to understand that a human being needs to be loved only by one other person. To the rest of fellow human beings, it is enough with being mutually respectful.

  • @Val__609
    @Val__609 Před 3 měsíci +5

    Thank you. I loved this episode. It was so positive. I like all your episodes actually. But this was especially nice.

  • @AnjeloValeriano
    @AnjeloValeriano Před 17 dny

    Psychedelics are just an exceptional mental health breakthrough. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against depression and anxiety. Saved my life.

  • @greenliter1
    @greenliter1 Před 3 měsíci +6

    I’ve also been fascinated by shipwrecks and history since I could remember.

    • @mares4636
      @mares4636 Před měsícem

      I'm obsessed about the Holocaust, the horrors of it, the testimonies that were recorded.

  • @Okie93
    @Okie93 Před měsícem +1

    My dad was a gifted and talented teacher for 20 years until the program was canceled. Every kid WANTED to be in my dad's class. I believe he may be ADHD and an extrovert. He was funny and all the kids loved him. He made it seem like the cool class, and should have been the poster child for what a gifted and talented class should look like.

  • @amberpelton5679
    @amberpelton5679 Před 26 dny +1

    I was diagnosed with autism when i was 45. So two years later, i am diving head first into understand why i am the way i am. I am so grateful for finding people who are like me. I enjoy your videos so much and they are so helpful too! ❤❤❤

    • @ChrisandDebby
      @ChrisandDebby  Před 26 dny +1

      So glad our videos are helping 😍😍 Thanks for the kind words

  • @user-kd4ct2qv4f
    @user-kd4ct2qv4f Před 3 měsíci +2

    I'm just overwhelmed how true this is of me and explains so many things looking back. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

  • @stephanieborron857
    @stephanieborron857 Před měsícem +1

    This is one of the best videos I've seen that share the positive aspects of being autistic in today's world. I have two boys that align with your 10 clues. Thank you! 😊

  • @Juleesuz
    @Juleesuz Před měsícem +1

    My son has had echolalia when first started to finally speak. But it wasn't how you described. For him he would be like a parrot and mimic things and sounds. He also used rote, or memorized, words or phrases that he knew would convey what he wanted to say, bit kind of a robotic way. It's like it was emotionless and very mechanical. He was a late speaker. It wasn't until he was 3 1/2 years old when we started to see some changes in his speech patterns. It was so joyful to hear after about a year and a half of speech therapy. So happy. I love his brain and who he is. He is 14 now and I would not trade all of it for the world!!!

  • @IsaidImlistening
    @IsaidImlistening Před měsícem +3

    I get fired within 2 months from every job even though I've done the work of 2-3 ppl. The patterns I see are obvious to me but others think I'm nuts so I stopped telling them.

    • @walterdavies6434
      @walterdavies6434 Před měsícem

      same here. work hard but cant last in a job. must be my social skills

  • @denizday7785
    @denizday7785 Před měsícem +2

    It's interesting. I completely related to half of the "clues"; the other half made my brain feel jumbled and dizzy just thinking about (I'm especially looking at you attention to detail. 😂) I have no idea whether or not I'm a little autistic, but I really enjoy learning more about the different ways people are able to process information. Thanks for the work you do! 🤩

  • @Awesomefulninja
    @Awesomefulninja Před 16 dny

    I'm just at the beginning of the video, but the bottom-up thinking and wallpaper example made me think about how much I love macro photography. I walk around taking pictures of bark, moss, rocks, detail in fabric, etc. They're my favourite subjects 💜

  • @scipop01134
    @scipop01134 Před 3 měsíci +7

    Just wanted to say thank you 😀 Your contentent has been very helpful and hopeful. Just starting my journey of discovery/diagnosis late in life after retirement, it’s been an interesting puzzle. You and many other advocates have been very helpful. Thank you for sharing 👍

  • @samhiatt
    @samhiatt Před měsícem +2

    Thank you for plugging Steph Jones' book! I watched an interview with her awhile ago and was really impressed, but I forgot her name and couldn't find the video. Thanks for the serendipitous reminder!

    • @ChrisandDebby
      @ChrisandDebby  Před měsícem

      I enjoyed the book so much that after my wife and I both bought a copy, we bought the audio version to listen to in the car. It’s the best book on autism I’ve read so far.

  • @1103beka
    @1103beka Před 3 měsíci +5

    People sometimes accuse me of being judgmental when in my opinion I'm just stating facts/things I observe. I often times still don't get it right away when people are suddenly defensive about something I pointed out - it really confuses me.

    • @PhotonBeast
      @PhotonBeast Před 3 měsíci +1

      I get the sense that it comes down to both phrasing and the other individuals interpretation of that phrasing. This is easier to understand in professional environments where there's usually some sub-text that people are speaking informationally, but in personal context, that's usually far less. Seems like a lot of it comes down to combining the feeling of hearing the thing with the factuality of the thing itself. Or something like that; I admit, it's still somewhat elusive for me as well at how readily and common it is for the various emotions to mix and cloud with the observations (and statement of those observations).

  • @l3martin
    @l3martin Před 2 dny

    I am thrilled to have discovered numerous CZcams channels that cater specifically to a marginalized group of people, that of high-functioning, high-masking autistics.
    One thing these channels have highlighted for me is that autistic individuals can excel at collaborating with others, and even take on leadership roles.
    One of my talents is having a keen eye for observing people without much effort. Despite working in a highly technical field, I can quickly determine which roles suit someone best and which they should avoid, often within minutes of interacting with them. This ability has allowed me to form new teams, turn around struggling ones, and restructure departments effectively.
    As Adrian Monk, the character from the TV show *Monk*, says about his clearly autistic abilities: "It's a blessing and a curse." 🙂
    But I wouldn't have it any other way. 😀

  • @greenliter1
    @greenliter1 Před 3 měsíci +3

    Stemming gives me pure joy and let me experience the world it almost a carefree way. Also the ability to see patterns and how things connect together gives an amazing picture of how the world works, and how to subjects that don’t seem to fit together truly do and complementing each other and it’s a push and pull and completely fascinating to me.I wish others could understand the scope of how many things work together. Perhaps that’s why I love English and music and weather. I would love science, but there’s so many things to remember that I just can’t wrap my brain around.😂

  • @scottgardener
    @scottgardener Před 10 dny

    Intelligence, hyper focus, and non-judgmental mind set-these qualities have been extremely helpful. And, it certainly makes sense that having differing neurodivergent staff members working on problem-solving will boost different perspectives and approaches. Science certainly benefits from this, but so would any problem-solving endeavor.

  • @nilesta
    @nilesta Před měsícem +2

    I can smell a UTI 4 weeks before it will show up on a dipstick test. I had to ask a nurse I know why it wasn't blindingly obvious, and they always had to send it to a lab, can they not smell it?!?! Apparently most people can't smell it. I guess that's a super power, I'm just not sure how useful it is.

  • @Stess-ky4gn
    @Stess-ky4gn Před 3 měsíci +3

    Seeing the details first is a survival skill. Two cavemen walking down the path, the one who survived is the one who sees the snake. Pattern recognition, the spots in the tall grass become the out line of a tiger. My eye could frame it's fearful symmetry, and the normals are kibble. I always said one of my best assets is the ability to side step. Conclusion, we need more snakes and tigers.

  • @illuvises
    @illuvises Před 3 měsíci +6

    Thank you for the audio quality 😊

  • @jasonthomas208
    @jasonthomas208 Před měsícem +1

    I got my late diagnosis last October at 57. I now know why I've struggled my entire life!

  • @allyndeimos
    @allyndeimos Před 2 měsíci +2

    Pattern recognition for the win! Makes you quick on your feet. I got good grades on a class everyone else was practically failing cus I noticed the pattern of the exam questions and studied for them in accordance to that.

  • @jliller
    @jliller Před měsícem +2

    I have high-functioning AuDHD and I got 9/10 on this list.
    The one that doesn't apply to me is being nonjudgmental. I'm actually quite judgmental (most of my masking involves holding back from expressing my sharp opinions). I would expect autistic people to be more judgmental than average. We have a strong sense of right & wrong, we value order, we notice details, and are usually picky about a lot of things - we very strongly want the world to be a certain way.
    That said, being judgmental has very little to do with bullying others. Bullying occurs when making another person feel bad makes the bully feel good. This stems from the bully's personal insecurities and/or because the target is an "other" perceived as a threat to the bully's "tribe."

  • @pierrebearr
    @pierrebearr Před 3 měsíci +1

    The super smell is TRUE. I've been told I'm crazy so many times because nobody else seems to notice the smells I pick up!!!
    I also just wanted to say thank you for your channel. I've been absorbing any and all content you've made while awaiting autism evaluation, and I received a diagnosis today. :) it's put so many things into context. Love your content, keep it up!

  • @user-py7pu2op5u
    @user-py7pu2op5u Před 14 dny

    Being a visual thinker definitely gives a leg up in engineering and scheduling. I find my superpower is holding a lot of 3D scenarios in my head and simultaneously processing those multiple scenarios... To the people watching me in the office all they see is me opening and closing outlook repeatedly.

  • @lunaodemaris
    @lunaodemaris Před 3 měsíci +2

    Thank you for the positive video, love it, is so much disinformation out there, and you put it so well explained, and centered and positive way, I wish it wasn’t this much judgment, thank you for inform us all.

  • @marcondespaulo
    @marcondespaulo Před měsícem

    It has been less than a month after my late diagnosis, it has been a thrilling ride! Watching all these videos from you and other autistic youtubers allowed me to recognize so many of this things in me.

  • @vanessarae4746
    @vanessarae4746 Před měsícem +1

    I got em all in spades
    Pattern recognition is fun, i can set my algorithm to find the shape/size/ color/pattern desired and find objects easily: waldo always pops out of his hiding place in seconds, and four leaf clovers literally glow in the grass. Iʻve found one while RUNNING, and doubled back to pick it to prove it to my companion, and while dancing - picked that one to wow an audience member… but also works on events, environments (the smell thing) and peopleʻs behavior as well… and having a 3-D modeler inside my head is great for building things and working out designs, packing things efficiently, fixing broken things, and much more…

  • @artificial-frequencies

    Scored a 10/10 … and my “superpower” is that I feel a day ahead that the weather is going to change while the weather forecasts says differently….

  • @chocolee7059
    @chocolee7059 Před 3 měsíci +2

    It did not shock me to hear any of these clues. Mainly due to already knowing these things existed about me that I couldn’t easily relate to most people about. But now I can add this to the evidence of my autism. I feel validated knowing these are clues that are also signs of my Autism. I am currently seeing a therapist for a hopefully near future assessment.

  • @Brainalicious
    @Brainalicious Před 3 měsíci +1

    I am a photographer, so all those details fill my mental cup. The fact I'm capturing images is secondary to how I'm seeing everything in new ways as I *really* look. ❤

  • @BanFamilyVlogging
    @BanFamilyVlogging Před 3 měsíci +2

    I’m ADHD & Autistic, so I’m capable of hyper focusing pretty impressively, but I think my ADHD brain helps take the edge off of getting interrupted. Usually, anyway 😜

  • @dr.threatening8622
    @dr.threatening8622 Před měsícem +1

    I work for a utility on complex electro mechical high voltage circuit breakers. Complex systems have always intruiged me. My ADHD gets satisfied by the fact that I rarely work in the same location for more than 2 or 3 days. My job is perfect, for now.

  • @Catl8044
    @Catl8044 Před 3 měsíci +2

    Being nonjudgmental for me goes along with bottom up thinking because I am looking at the details before I see the big picture allowing me to adjust my perspective as my focus zooms out

  • @Feiself
    @Feiself Před měsícem +1

    So... I have a mastery degree in human behavior. I've been studying psychology since 2011. I haven't actively studied autism, but it's crazy to me that I'm just now solidifying that I might have high-masking autism. I knew I had some tendencies, but it overlaps with trauma, so I didn't think anything of it.
    The memory? The design? honesty? non-judgmental behavior? tunnel vision?
    It's crazy how every point was spot on. Picking up some books now. Thanks for the self-discovery!

  • @JuliaMyriam
    @JuliaMyriam Před 3 měsíci +2

    Thank you so much Chris, I can confirm everything.

  • @BanFamilyVlogging
    @BanFamilyVlogging Před 3 měsíci +2

    Hahaha I’ve always been the most detail-oriented person in any work group that I’m in (by far), so this first clue makes total sense to me 😆

  • @dudedude31415
    @dudedude31415 Před měsícem +1

    I once found an error in delivery data because two different data sheets had the same 5 decimal digits in a measurement.
    I built a whole test routine around this error and it's still getting used.
    Raw data is so much more enjoyable than chit chat.

  • @gwynstuart
    @gwynstuart Před 18 dny

    One of your best videos. So informative. Thanks👍🏻

  • @barbaradoye1989
    @barbaradoye1989 Před 3 měsíci +1

    Excellent video! Autism is not a curse! It's a gift in diversity! The world needs us and they have no idea how much! Autistics were born to do "Stay at home orders"! Washing my hands thoroughly is a given. Following rules a must! Following moral values and being kind, ingrained. I just might forget my friends exist. I might pin them down and spew facts they never knew and them getting a word in edgewise, might not happen! If you ask how you look in that outfit... I will say you look better in the previous one, to be kind and honest. I see all the bad in people but I also see the good and the "human". I might have frequent absences but when I'm around, I'm putting in 100% and then some. Routines just make sense for everyone. More people should try it that are not on the spectrum, especially those with children. If I am asking too many questions, a lot of the time it's because I am trying to learn it by your specifications and to see things through your eyes... no matter how misguided!😂😀 You won't catch me jumping out of a plane expecting the attached bedsheet will break my fall or affixing a rubber band to my ankles while jumping off a bridge! I'll be at home, holding down the fort! You're welcome human race!😂😀 Take care, everyone! You are all valuable and in some respects, golden!😀

  • @kindrawalker3057
    @kindrawalker3057 Před měsícem +1

    I read a lot that ASD people don't get social cues or body language. I believe we do, but that it often conflicts with what a person is saying. So when the body language says one thing, while the person is saying the opposite, which do you believe? Very confusing.
    I totally agree with the Memory trait talked about here. I have childhood memories from less than one year old--corroborated by other family members.
    Another odd trait of mine that I have learned is a thing for ASD people is that I could read very early. Reading is a pattern recognition process. I could read before I could talk.
    I was diagnosed at 44. It's been freeing. I no longer feel like I am wrong, or something to be fixed. However, that doesn't change that a lot of the traits I have--honesty for one--are not appreciated at all by society.

  • @cycoekiller119
    @cycoekiller119 Před měsícem +1

    yes with pattern recognition and sticking to rules! im obsessed with a bingo game on roblox and when they changed the default font of the numbers it ruined my next few days because the line weight was slightly thinner than the previous one and i kept obsessing over how the 6's tail curved differently.