We Hardly Ever Have Sex
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- čas přidán 8. 09. 2024
- On this episode, we hear about:
- A woman at a loss for how to improve intimacy with her husband
- A wife desperate to rebuild trust in her marriage
- A woman reeling after learning her dad is still alive
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The more I watch these videos and hear what is going on in peoples relationships the more I appreciate what I have.
Yes, me too. 😊
I found out my husband was having an affair 2 weeks before giveing birth to our second child, we divorced, that was a good thing!!!
Yeah totally. Gonna be a really good thing for your child to grow up without a father. Good job you just put your child at every statistical disadvantage known to man 😂
Electronic devices- phones, etc.. are absolutely destroying relationships. With our husbands, wives, kids & even pets. It’s very rare to see someone actually paying attention to or engaging with their dog when they walk it anymore.. it’s pathetic.
That’s a bit dramatic. Before cell phones this was still an issue only the outlet was different. Example is men leaving every night to go have a few drinks at a bar rather then being home with his family. It’s never been about the devices it’s about the person.
Well said
If my phone is out when walking my dog, its because im filming or taking a pic of him (he’s so cute)
@@imnezu8940divorce rates have never been higher and single motherhood has never been higher.
@@imnezu8940we have a fundamental problem with our society and it starts with parents.
We are in our late 70s. We go at it like frantic zoo monkees on speed 5 nights a week😮😮 We have been married 46 years!!!
Epic relationship goals
@@Catseye189 🥒
I wanna be like yall when i get married haha
First caller - I was in a marriage that was similar . Sex maybe 4 times a year . My husband was going through the motions of our life - letting me do everything . Then He started talking to me about his day , helping me clean house ,letting me rest and taking the kids . I swear - I became like an animal . A horny animal ! Him being involved and helping me really spoke to me . Now we have already had more sex in 2024 than we did all of 2023 . 😂
Thank you for this. I'm not the caller but this is important to me.
Damn I WISH! Maybe I should try to stop helping for a while see if when I do start helping again things pick up
Happy for you 🙏🏿❤️ people don't realise that when women are less stressed and weight downed by housework, our libido goes upppp (put your wife at ease, fellas 😏)
Not to suggest anything specific, just inquiring out of curiosity. Is he a full-time, part-time employee/business owner, or a stay at homer? And, similarly, what is your occupational status?
On an unrelated to-the-above note. It isn't saying much that the two of you have, after two months, "already" got squirrelly more than the four times you did in '23. Still, that's trending in the right direction. So good for you all 😜
@@ohshiz4244 hello ! Both full time workers at 60+ hours a week each . Regular everyday jobs. With 2 kiddos just trying to make it work. I do WFH in the healthcare industry but it’s super busy ! We both have to help each other because of how much we work and it seems like that just now clicked for him . I was getting off work and staying up until midnight cleaning / laundry/ getting this together for the next day .
My hubby and I were each other's firsts, and 17 years later, we are still together, and our sex life was fantastic from day one.
Lack of experience doesn't mean it won't be good.
Ya all are the rare lucky ones!
@atomic66 but I work very hard at my relationship....and my hubby too. We have had our rough times, but we try not to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. I'll admit it's not always easy, but we don't see any other option, but to make it work and make the best of it. We have kids together, and we owe it to them to provide a home with both parents living under the same roof in a loving relationship. I could probably find another man who is better looking or has more money, and he could probably find another hotter, younger woman, but we choose each other every single day....we choose our love and our respect for one another every single day (as cheesy as that sounds). And when the going gets rough, we remember all the hard times we've made it through, and it makes our bond even stronger.
At the end of it all, it takes a lot of effort from both parties and a conscious decision to do what is right and not what you always want to do or feel like doing. The right thing is often something you don't feel like doing....
And the problem with most people now days is that they think if they don't love doing something or feel like doing that task, then they shouldn't have to.....the whole"you do you" or "whatever makes you happy".....and that's all a lie. Relationships are sacrifices, but they're also amazingly rewarding.
@@atomic66 Why lucky? There's nothing luck-based in learning. I don't understand why having had sex with many *other* people, with whom you've very likely had less time than your life partner, would somehow give you a permanent advantage in the bedroom.
Same here!! We were each others firsts and have amazing sex life
There can be A LOT that comes with that too for many. Trust being a huge one. Some people wonder why things are so good..and eventually find out that they're not the only ones/things making it that "great"..and some regress while others choose not to care and live in a fantasy land and fool themselves. Others, it's totally real and genuine. That's the sad reality of many relationships and what makes it a "not one size fits all" issue. Congratulations if your relationship is genuine and full of truths and zero deception, etc. ❤Truly 🙏
I have no desire to be intimate w someone who is lazy when I am exhausted. I think most women feel this way too
What if that man is lazy because he was working all day?
And whining, I don't want to be whined at for sex
He's not exhausted too?
@@Bdchi3 OK, and?
yea, if someone is truly exhausted the options are limited but hopefully not 0😅 One thing that my partner and I like to say is "when you're only running at 20% I can pick up the other 80%" meaning, its okay to allow our sex life to ebb when it is naturally needed because the other person will do their best to communicate when it becomes bothersome, and before then, do what they can to enjoy and spark what opportunities do exist c: but if the other partner were to get lazy, I could see things getting resentful fast
The excuse of , "Lack of previous sexual experience" just makes me mad. Get your experience with your spouse!!!! Fill each other's every desire.
Life gets hard, and the easiest thing to cut is intimacy. You MUST make a conscious effort to create a loving, intimate marriage.
We are 18 years in, we've been to hell and back in those years. We've literally staired death in the face, and there were patches of time when our relationship sucked. We didn't have time for a conversation much less time for sex. About 5 years in, we realized we wanted more from our relationship and began to make a conscious, purposeful effort for a better healthier love life. Now, all these years later, our love life is better than I ever knew was possible.
You give me hope!❤
"Get your experience with your spouse!!!" Amen!!!
Yeah that comment was like “who cares?!” They seem a little clueless about this whole situation.
This has more to do with the fact he can’t ejaculate and hasn’t been able to since he was a teenager. This is way more than learning.
Amen! Keep up effort!!! Marriages die when people give up… marriage just needs to willing people to show up and try…
The “cant bust” thing is so real. You get it in your head that you couldn’t finish last time, so why would this time be any different? It’s a vicious cycle.
And guys have it in their head that they can't bust too soon. They wait so long and then poof.
stop watching pron
When you find the right woman it can balance out. I never bust too fast with my gf I’m extremely attracted to her but I love to please do we always end up going for a while. Maybe he should watch porn while they have sex next time
I had an early "buster" and he freaked out in the beginning and took his backpain meds to last longer and when I found out I told him I'd rather he finish quick and feel everything than be under pressure and be numb and mess up his liver. I'm not a penetrative type person...I mean I enjoy it but I don't have to go on forever. I think it's cute he can't last as long as we cuddle and are close that's what matters most to me...plus he has other reallt good moves and qualities. I think just letting him know that took a big burden off of him and he could just relax and enjoy...he's got the cutest "O face " I almost make it a competition as to how fast I can get him there xD
When she said I suspect it could be psychological, I was yelling at the screen like of course it is!!! It's a huge part. Can't last, can't finish, it's deep in the mind and can be devastating. & Once you're thinking about it it's damn near over. But he's not the first & it can absolutely improve! Even be completely/95% resolved!
The BEST mental health show on the planet. Thank you.
Cell phones, TV, outside distractions, lack of eating healthy, vitamins, lack of healthy sleep; all of these are pretty much what leads to all intimacy issues in marriages.
All of these things affect all aspects in a person, emotional, psychological, physical and spiritual.
We have been fostering a child for 6 months and our marriage has taken a plunge and my wife is nowhere to be found. So being extremly proactive and intentional is key
I think her husband is rhymes with lay but starts with G.
I just watched two short videos. Like 20 mins long... never seen this guy before but gut tells me I like him. Don't even remember his name as I'm stuck in this comment but I never find new people... I appreciate the algorithm bringing this gentleman to me. I cant wait to watch more! First new channel in months maybe years. I just love how empathetic he plays. Some people fake it and God forbid he could be... but my gut tells me this guy is genuine. I'm glad I found this channel.
“It’s not your job to make him feel better for abandoning his little girl” 😔
I saw the title. I’m 70 years old and I was talking to the fellow septuagenarian over the weekend.
I told him yes it’s been so long since I had sex I forget who gets tied up😮
And I just told my wife for Lent I want to give up celibacy.
I’ll let you know how it goes
Lol
😂 good luck!
You are an inspiration! I have a new Lent goal.
😂❤
Good! Wish my hubby would!
On our wedding night in Aruba my husband took off with his aunt and went gambling. I should have know my life would be sexless! Getting divorced in sept
Good
What happened to your vows you said in front of God?
@@boston312 Clearly they rushed something that was not smart or faithful and not everyone is religious.
@@boston312 honestly, I married a narcissistic alcoholic unfortunately! I am a firm believer in Jesus and love Jesus very much. My husband is not a Christian. He put his hands around my neck last Christmas Eve. The verbal abuse and domestic is too much to bare. I’m being obedient to Jesus to move to Arizona. I’m on Gods assignment now. 💕
i have no problem with you divorcing. its just the vows part i had an issue with. If you said something like" Till you put hands on me do we part" that would have been completely acceptable in God's eyes. But im pretty sure you said "until death do we part" which lies the problem.@@glowieokenney7915
I have a special needs child also and we were often exhausted at night. We found that we had to be intentional when we set up intimate time. It's so important!!
Yes! Same.
No it’s not, sex is for procreation only. Not necessary .
@@secretsiren6769 no, it's also an important aspect of the bonding of the spouses.
Both attributes are necessary - procreation and unification
Glad I'm not with you. This is a totally selfish thought. The Creator gave us this precious gift to procreate AND to delight, please and comfort each other. If you withhold this from your mate, there is no love. Very sad. @@secretsiren6769
Umm, your post sounds odd. Maybe rewrite it. Lol
I feel this sometimes with my partner.
We had fertility issues, we lost 5 babies but have 2 healthy rainbow babies now.
Our 2nd child is now 2 and we are always exhausted as it took a long time to be successful. 45 with a 2 year old, not very common.
That will be me. I am 43 with a 5 month old!
I had fertility issues too we thought mostly due to my age 38 when we began trying and I also travel for work which limited time with my husband at the best times but it turns out that my husband had a fertility issue.
Damn I'm working while listening to this and even as a grown man *I rarely cry* I almost teared up listening to the last caller's story. I hope the caller and her sister do well and have a happy fulfilling lives going forward
Monica’s story is exactly what happened to my grandfather. His father left him and started a new family.
Her mom probably told her kids dad died because she felt it would hurt them less than saying he left us and started a new family
Perhaps. But that is still not ok. People deserve and have a right to know who their parents are.
@@nt3833if he wanted to know them he wouldn’t have left?
@@nt3833 It's not like the dad wanted a relationship with the kids and the mom stopped him from having it. He basically abandoned them and didn't want to see them anymore. What I mean is that she wouldn't have known who he is even if the mom told her. He vanished.
Saying that he is dead is easier on the mind than saying that he left and is not interested in seeing you. There is no contact detail or interest on his part, it's like he's dead. I bet she feels sorry she found out. She was happier not knowing.
Intimacy is so important, it really can make or break a relationship. It’s easy to get into a routine of doing the same things, really have to switch it up. Try new things often, have lots of talks about what turns you on lately. Make sure you are keeping healthy mentally and physically, that factors into sex too. Keep your attraction going, don’t let your looks fade, it takes work…but well worth it🙏🏼🙏🏼
I can't believe she left out the fact that her husband can't climax when discussing their intimacy issues lol, that seems the first thing you would think of
Yeah she danced around the real issue for several minutes.
Huge red flag.:(
I think she is embarassed because the first thing anybody would think is that he isn't sexually attracted to her. She is definitly blaming herself. There is probably more going on. Maybe he is gay. She is definitly in denial about everything and doesn't want to see the elephant in the room.
Took forever to get to the real issue...but I hope this couple gets the help they need.
I'm not even sure if she really understood just how much that that was the real issue.
@@GameChanger597 She knew because she says she had been telling him that that was the issue for a long time.
Yes omg they seem a little clueless and avoidant. They need some outside help to get to the bottom of the issue.
You have absolutely NO RIGHT to be upset with your partner for cheating if you’ve done it yourself. It don’t matter who does it first.
I agree, and another thing I’ll ad the woman kept on harping on it and bringing it up and making herself mad about it over and over and over again that eventually she set her own self up for failure. The chance that those people make it I think is pretty slim.
Sometimes I think we don’t want to forgive people because it feels like our ammo for revenge. Like we are just standing around with a backpack full of ammo like one day we might just give them what they deserve. But that’s not our job to deal out judgments. That’s for the Lord. Love your show Dr.John!
It's not aboit forgiveness but about minding your own business. If someone betrays you intentionally, harms you etc., it makes no sense to keep them in your life, especially if you are still recovering from the blow. You need to focus on yourself, not the other person. My forgiveness is irrelevant as it's just a word, my healing is my purpose. The reality is when people ask for forgiviness, they actually want a chance at continuing to be part of your life and it's about their want not yours. They're not asking because they genuinly want to know if you healed and are ok now. Besides, there is no Lord. Nobody is going to punish those people. We die and that's it.
Monica from NY needs to also understand - The father abandoning her family - was never about HER, or her sister - not their fault, never was. It was only about him and her Mother, who took the truth to the grave.
I’m shocked that her husband hasn’t had a full psychological workup the very first thing. She kept saying the problem is that they both didn’t know what to do in the bedroom. That’s bull. The truth finally at twenty minutes is that her guy can’t climax. They need deep therapy separately and together as a couple.
Sounds like an undisclosed porn addiction on the husband's side.
@@veronicalagor4771Thats a leap, considering he's dealt with it since childhood AND he can't, even on his own.
Childhood sexual trauma is a WITCH, especially for men. That doesn't always mean rape, but could also be if he were shamed for normal sexual exploration or for "morning wood."
@@veronicalagor4771or he’s not straight.
@@thelifeofmaryd.2494 it's really not a leap, there's a lot of shame wrapped up in porn (appropriately) and he could be lying to cover it up.
It's a leap to say that's definitely the problem, but throwing it out there as a possibility is fair
Geeze - The first caller has to sent as a message for my marriage - We adopted 4 children - all special needs, 3 are siblings adopted years apart so we could keep the kids together. We are burned out, disconnected and essentially sexless marriage for 8+ years. Finding our way back, is almost impossible. No kissing, she avoids anything that would be sexually intimate. She won't embrace, doesn't initiate hugs or anything - lives on her phone or TV show. She does hold hands, but overly busy, sleeping and her phone are her avoidance mechanisms. We have discussed at length, she blames me for my disconnection and overload for the last 15 years - but I hate the fault / blame game - we both own this relationship and work towards re-bonding instead of re-hashing.
Damn dude. You have 3 special needs kids and expect your wife to also fulfill your sexual needs? What about her need? Apparently she's said some things but you call it "blame-game". Her needs are equally as important. In fact there is no way for you to get yours met without meeting hers. And I'd bet money that she doesn't initiate hugs because you push her for the bedroom when she does it.
Never knew there were so many of us married over 10-15 yrs sexless for most of it...this should interesting!
Not surprised. People stop communicating
No thanks. I have been there. I don't ever want to be there again!
@SarahG16925 once a month/ 12 times a year is a sexless marriage.
@briannecaswell6204
In your opinion, how did you get there?
I'm about to get married, and this is something I hope we can avoid
Once a week or every other is sexless
First caller: one of y'all needs to be INTENTIONAL about intimacy and connection.
Maybe she just doesn't turn him on ?
I was married for twenty five years and at the end begged for sex. When they shut down they shut it down.
Takes two to tango. They both need to be
Sometimes, u have to stop and listen to others to realize how common some issues are, samething happens to me trying to pursue my goals, the intimacy died slowly as a result of been exerting to much energy and was mentally exhausted by the time i got to her.
Sounds like the husband is a Dismissive Avoidant. I'm married to one and deep connection, vulnerability, and intimacy are non existent.
Same with my husband and we have been married for 21 years.
@@1230aaish How do you do it? I'm at the ten year mark and I'm really ready to call it quits. I can't take being roommates and having zero connection with the man I'm supposed to be the closest to.
Just reading your comment. Not blaming you at all, but ask your husband. “Is there ever a time where you think I used what you told me against you in an argument or in a conversation” that could be a reason why he doesn’t want to be vulnerable. It literally takes one time to do that with us men. Just a thought, but I could totally be wrong about your situation
@@christinan2928one year seperated from this same man. Unfortunately dismissive avoidants are one of the hardest people to even attempt to change. Theyre like impenetrable walls
I was married to a dismissive avoidant and had to divorce him so that I wouldn't die inside. I realized he did not care about me at all, my needs, my feelings, or the fact that his treatment was killing me. I also realized that the entire relationship revolved around what he felt like/didn't feel like doing and I simply could not be completely nonexistent in my own marriage any longer.
Completely agree that it is difficult in Canada to find doctors who care now :/ but it's worth looking for one because you both deserve pleasure. Wishing you luck!
It's the same in the US, but her issue is that she and her husband probably lied to the doctors about what's actually going on out of shame. He feels shame bc he can't cum and she feels shame bc she can't make him
Have you ever thought about writing song lyrics...... I mean you are in a band, right? "You're drowning in a sea of neutrality, you're trying to play both sides of the fence and it's going to kill ya." pretty intense. I am so glad that you are available and here for people. Love God, Love People. THANK YOU!!
Maybe the husband is lying and has a porn addiction so he cant finish with his wife... i know she says "hes had this problem since he was a teenager" and maybe he has had a porn addiction that long... its a possibility he is lying to her about there being a medical issue because he is ashamed. And didnt want to move forward with medical options because it wasnt real. 😅 i dont know i hope they figure it out.
Yep
@@2okaycolayep
Definitely a real possibility
Yep it was the first thing I thought of, too.
yep
congrats on being responsible and loving parents ❤
Man! I feel so bad for the lady from NY, Monica. Prayers to her and the rest of her family. 🙏🏾🙏🏾😔
I dont think i could ever have a talk with my husband about our relationship. It would definitely end into an argument. 😔 ive been holding in so much that honestly when jhon askee if she has doubt her self… i cried. 😢
Every single day I learn something new. Thank you.
Climaxing ≠ good sex. You can have a good sex life even when you struggle to orgasm. Sexual intimacy is sm more than that !
Real question: how do parents have intimacy? Our granddaughter lives with us and she is on my hip all day. Our youngest daughter and granddaughter are with us basically all the time.
Don't restrict yourself to nights in bed. Daytime when kids are occupied with cartoons, ten minute quickie in the bathroom...we got a babysitter once for a couple of hours and did it in the car, lol. The challenge can be fun as long as you are in it together. ❤
We turn on a TV and lock the door
Tell Mom to take her daughter to the park for 3 hours every week lol
@@TheYazmanian well mom is deployed. That’s why we let her sleep in our bed. She’s having a lot of sadness missing mom.
@@MW-rb3ny I thank her for her service. It's so hard to be away from Mom. You are very supportive parents, good on you! I guess for the original question you'll have to sneak it when she's napping etc? Or after she goes to bed. That's definitely a tricky one!
If the bedroom is boring you... Get ohtta there! You deserve better for this amazing family you built!
Yes!!! Me toooo
How am I able to talk to this guy I never told anyone about my emotions or how I feel but this guy makes me feel comfortable to talk about it
I have never and will never have a tv in my bedroom, bedroom and bed are for sex, intimacy and sleep. So if my woman and i are in the bedroom together we both know one of those 3 things is gonna happen.😂
I wish Dr. John had been our marriage counselor 😢
Seems very psychological 😮 sad… I could never lol
I had an ex who had a blocked vas deferen so this definitely should get checked. He was unable to climax regularly. I hope they get him situated! Man always ignore their health and it wasn’t until after we broke up that he called and apologized for it being a health issue.
The most powerful book for this Cupids Poison Arrow by Marnia Robinson!!!!! Super powerful for this. Great ways to get connected without the pressure of sex, so sex can happen sooner.
Ah, as a fellow Ontario resident, I wish you luck with the doctor part. There's not a chance in hell you can find a new PCP, let alone a good one. A psychologist is definitely the way to go here. Even the exploritory procedure will take the better part of a year, or more, to get booked.
Yep, bad idea to EVER go with nationalized Healthcare. My kid would have died waiting for open heart surgery in that system.
@SarahG16925 there are pros and cons to both sides. Canada is in an exceptionally bad position at the moment though. I have an IUD that's stuck in my uterus at the moment. My PCP told me it would likely be 4-6 weeks to hear about an ultrasound to check it out and from there "probably only a couple months to get booked for a specialty removal". So on total will probably be 6 months start to finish to have it removed. That's hugely unacceptable to me and in this case I wish paying for quicker service was an option.
I live in Toronto (416) and both my spouse & I found new family doctors this year. It’s a bit easier in the city but if you live in a smaller area it’s tough.
@@KaitCerviare you in TO? The women’s health centre at Mt Sinai has been great - I got a referral there without waiting.
@mollysmom-bf1yi wow, you're lucky. In Kingston, we don't even have walk-in clinics because we don't have doctors to staff them.
First caller: so hes known for forever that hes had this issue and shes known before they were married he had this issue.
He just doesnt want to deal with it medically. If he wasnt to get it sorted out to have children hes not going to do anything now.
Did she think this issue was going to improve once they married.
Like how he convinced her it involved surgery vs a scope being passed, via frozen gel, so no pain to look for blockages. Son hes thinking cut open big surgery.
Sounds like he was sexually abused and hasn’t told anyone. More common than you think. But he needs to be a man and do what he needs to do to be a good husband for his wife. And he’s not doing it. She’s a saint. I would be so resentful of him which isn’t good either. But I commend her for how she is handling it.
Needed this with what I’m figuring out about my parents.❤😢
My husband's testosterone is almost zero after stroke damage. There are a multitude of specialties that could help him if he would go!
I was turned off by my last relationship and sex slowed down, because he wanted wife/step mom behavior from a girl friend after telling me he never wanted to remarry and if we lived together it would be a 50/50 financial split (he had 2 younger kids). He wasn’t taking a real man role and blaming me for the actions of his ex wife. Didnt make me feel intimate.
he doesnt deserve the sex in my opinion lol! i would feel the same
Awe Monica ❤❤
We are roommates.
It's a good day to be single, celibate, and at peace. Nobody makes a mess for me to clean then pesters me like I'm a vending machine.
“Have you tried taking things OUT of the bedroom” ….. amazing point John
In Canada as long as one has the medicare card 15 therapy sessions of 50 minutes are free. Mental health for the Canadian goverment has been a priority and is for everyone.
Yeah except your therapists aren’t allowed to tell you the truth
@@emilyjoerger8964Not true in my case.
@@MsCristina38 how would you know? There are laws preventing them from telling the truth (does affirmative care sound familiar?) I am glad it sounds like you got the help you needed though!
@@emilyjoerger8964 There are no
laws from preventing psychologists or psychiatrists from telling their patients the truth. The law prevents them from discussing the patient’s case with anyone else but they are perfectly free to be open with their patients.
Your government suggests euthanasia for sad teenagers! 😂 cares about mental health 🤡
The 2nd woman, husband cheated 4-5, 1-2 yrs later she cheated 2wks with no sex, she left her job. Seriously NEED to know, did he leave his job after telling her about his affair. Why was that question not asked !!!???
Bro, 18 minutes in and we're finding out they took the longest route to figuring out the most important detail of a young couples lives.
Literally, the longest, most painful, and most expensive route possible.
Yeah, i was so annoyed w/ story #1 untill i thought about. 🤔 I can imagine that he was so insecure about this and trying to avoid dealing with this so much, that she chose to allow Dr. Delony to find the problem himself just so that her husband can't say she lead him to that answer. She said she knew it was the problem, but that her husband was avoiding it. Maybe know he'll FINALLY get it now that he's heard it from someone else. SMDarnH.😔
She started to explain past teen issues, and John cut her off, I think that stopped her explaining " his" past issue still present. He was so sure it was screens. So I was annoyed at that cut off, it detoured the story.
Same here. My marriage is almost sexless. She thinks it’s a chore.
There is a reason. One or both of you knows what it is. Why not confront the reason?
@@TheMariemarie16 trauma on her side. And I might ask to much. But we can’t afford counseling
@@Legacy4magic I am really sorry to hear that because these issues need to be resolved between you two and they CAN be resolved. Counseling by a certified counselor is very cheap and they have ones that specialize in that type of trauma instead of looking at a psychiatrist maybe you all could go there. If you look online make sure it's reputable.
You are not asking too much you all both have needs which should be met but you all have to come together and agree on how to meet those needs together and you shouldn't have to ask per se very often.
@@Legacy4magicbooks are free at the library.
Maybe you make it a chore-sawing and rasping away mindlessly as if it's a woodworking project. So yeah, I bet it IS a chore. Too many men are sexually inept, selfish, incompetent. Not to mention lazy as fallen logs around the home.
There were several inconsistencies in her story -fertility issues were checked but basics of him ejaculating was not, and the IVF route was closed based on what conclusion? And the doctor said the husband should go straight for a surgery, to cut and sew what without running any diagnostic tests. she beat around the physical intimacy problem as if it was an emotional/experiential issue not a medical problem that required surgery, supposedly. She tried to divert the issue to save herself from coming under the bus by stating both of them were inexperienced in bedroom dept. If she knew her husband has medical issue with his body, why would anyone say he’s inexperienced and lacks confidence. She tried to avoid getting called out by stating all’s good outside the bedroom, it’s just solely his problem inside it. With btw, he has no problem ejaculating without her few times that she is aware of. He didn’t want the surgery for doctors to explore what was wrong inside his body and she always wanted to adopt anyway, so they adopted. Completely insensitive and dismissive of husband and got her way this way or that. She lied through and through, probably he caught on it too with the IVF and surgery reply but didn’t call her out. She seems a superficial miss goody two shoes who wanted to avoid the problem from first go. she wants to save her own image that all the problem is with him, she’s fine and it’s his problem. Why would the poor husband feel emotionally intimate, let alone intimate in the bedroom, with this blaming negative person who lies about what happened and throws the husband under the bus with no care for him. She will surely show this validation alibi to her family and friends to show it’s his problem not hers. She wasn’t at al concerned about his seemingly depressed state of mind and health condition, answering with a yup, yes, yep, she checked out of the conversation long ago and never called to seek assistance. And, she not only contributes zero in the bedroom but highly possible must also nag him when he tried anything. What a nightmare to live with this woman.
We need the deep questions! Did he grow up in a deeply religious household? Was he allowed to be himself? Did his parents talk about people different from themselves? Idk I’m almost thinking he may be gay. Even as a teen that could be hard if he’s been told it’s bad and he’s going to hell. I’m not sure I could climax either if my fantasy could condemn me to hell! Maybe way off but it was just one of my first thoughts. It doesn’t seem like they really explored too deep in to this issue. 😢😮
3:00 "it sucks" maybe that's what needs to be revisited😅
To the first wife's husband:Try eating lot's of beef,my wife tells me I'm more energetic let's say......
This is interesting. I’m doing an experiment of cooking beef everyday this week. Shhh
Or shilajit
There's a lot better options than beef lol.
Add some onions on that, too. It'll complete the effect you are hoping for.
I heard my housemate oranges gets him going, too
I might be full of bs, but I think many marriages end up this way because of the trauma of trying to do too much. When we first got married stress release was done in the bedroom. As our jobs got more demanding we began to avoid intimate relations be cause it was easier than being intimate. She began to get angry if I just wanted to snuggle at night. I think she feared I would want intimacy, and she dreaded that. I quit trying because it was frustrating to constantly be rejected. This e e tall lead to major breaks in our relationship ship. Outside the bedroom also. I eventually moved into the guest bedroom because she had to habe the TV on all night long to sleep. I need silence to sleep well. Divorce e was not something we wanted. We did have two children during all this. So we did get it on at least twice. Lucky her, she got pregnant first try with each kid. Oh joy! So years later, Andi don't know how many, we discussed our future and how unfulfilled we both felt. She talked about how intimacy did not happen be cause I never initiated. So pulled out my journal I used to keep and let her read about
How I tried and was rejected. How she promised to set date nights but always broke them. Well at that point she called me an AH for writing stuff like that down.. I explained it was a kind of therapy for me, not a plan to humiliate her. She did not buy it. So I gave up. Best to keep my mouth shut and just pretend she is my sister.
Both of these sound like my marriage right now except my husband never had an affair.
Acupuncture may help. And qi gong. Seriously. Investigate it. It’s good for mind and body.
How did she not say that initially? Omg…
My first idea was don’t allow phones and laptops in the bedroom. Pretty obvious.
You obviously didn’t listen to the call. Way more to it than that.
My husband is on a bit of medications that suppress sex drive. Antidepressants and medications for his PKD. We've been married for less than 3 years. I'm worried about our future. We can't have children so it's not a want of that. Just our intimacy is lacking it sucks. He's talked to his dr a few times about the issue. We've tried a couple things but so far nothing has worked. :(
Big bellies on men lead to ED.
Just shortens the length.
John,
I overhead a phone conversation with you on yt about her man could not have an ejaculation. My husband n I had that same problem, so as soon as we were engaged, off we went to a urologist. He had what is called RETROGRADE ejaculation . This means the ejaculate turns around ( so to speak ), and the semen along with his boys ,ejaculates into his bladder. He says he feels like he had the big O... but the woman's vagina is dry, and she has not enjoyed feeling his ejaculation or her own orgasm .
This can be helped by taking certain meds a couple of hours prior to anticipated intercourse..
Easy peasy !!!
We had two children.
So there.
47:04 this bothers me so much…why do people always have some reason to give women excuses for bad behavior…BOTH the mother and father are in the wrong here. The mother was in the for wrong lying about the father and father was in the wrong for not reaching out sooner to his daughter. If we can so easily give grace to women than damnit do it for the fathers too…
Tv in the bedroom is a doomsday device
To the first caller “inexperience” is an excuse to not get there. Also, your husband is either a porn addict or gay. I say that if he refuses to be checked out by the dr until he has answer. If he’s either of those it’s time to move on.
To Monica: your Dad confirmed exactly who he is and the new family he created lives in a fantasy of him being a great guy, he used them to make himself feel better and lie to himself that he’s not a POS. He can’t undo what he did. Some people are parents and some are just donors. Having a relationship with him or his family serves him only. Forget them, be close to your family and spend your time and energy there. Unfortunately, as you’ve learned with your young niece, we don’t know how long we have on this earth, spend it with people who matter and forget everyone else.
OR a grown up sexual assault victim
Thanks buddy
The first husband is probably not interested in having more kids at this point in their lives. Not too shabby. Sounds like he’s heard that women just value affection and he’s got her on his mind.
Need full video version.
Very sad she has enabled her husband’s problem because he isn’t willing to discover why ‘things’ aren’t working for him. This problem may be simple & then she could get pregnant. It took her so long to get to the real problem w/Dr. John; don’t avoid the problem tackle it & get the answer & solution. I hope the couple both get counseling.
My schedule is nuts, and some days I have to really push past not sleeping after overnight shift so I can clean and make me and my bf dinner (have my own apartment, and I like to do these things my way when rushing. Otherwise he helps ofc). So exhausted and a bit moody after dinner lol he picks up the groceries, he will carry the love and intimacy progression and is very understanding and appreciative. Be patient with each other and both need to put in effort
He walked away from her mom.
it has been 3.5 years now for us
This lady’s neighbors and family are finding out her husband’s Intimate medical health problems! Wonder how he feels about that. They should have gone to a therapist instead of her letting the world know about their Intimate life. My humble opinion.
38:00 - you marry a new person every few years because of all the changes
She should definitely go see her Dad!!!!!!
17:25 Women vastly underestimate how psychological sex can be! And you got to remember this guy has so much history not being able to climax that it's so deeply embedded in his head that he's going to fail again and again and again, Dad him saying he doesn't know what he's doing. Is some more a cry for help that he doesn't know why he is the way he is or he has not talked about it yet.
ED Can wreak havoc on a man. It binds with shame, embarrassment, frustration. No wonder he wants to avoid it. He knows there's something wrong with him or something that he has to face and it is just become such a huge thing that it feels almost impossible. I'm so glad she's there for him and encouraging but if he wants to have a good life he's got to find his way. Could be medical but there's definitely a lot of psychological. Chemistry could be off as well. I sure hope this guy finds his way because that's no life to live!
Pelvic floor therapy can help husband's with erectile issues
" Imagine something beautiful
And reverse- engineer it. "
I am married for 18 years we had sex at the beginning twice at moth , the last 5 years only once at year , I and 54 this is terrible .. she don’t do nothing to help , time for divorce
Get out of there. Sexless relationship is the worst. Been there.
They need to see a marriage therapist
😄 A sex therapist sounds more fun for that
Most marriages are like this. You can only have sex with the same person so many times before it gets boring and redundant. Passport Bros is the way to go
Fellas never stay in a sexless relationship. NEVER!
You didn't listen to the episode did you?
He is some redpill weirdo looking to blame a woman for everything
He’s the problem lol
Females either.
@@kirox34 😂😂😂
You gotta take care of yourself. I see too many couples who give up on life and it affects there how they feel about each other. My wife and I try to have sex at least 2 times a week. You gotta put the effort in now matter how tired you are.
From personal experience, sounds like the husbands gay!
Please go see Dr. Peter Osborne. This could be deficiency's that is causing that issue. Please give him a try. He has saved my life and my husbands. Everything has to do with what you put into you body. One person's fuel could be another person's poison. Your husband could have food sensitivity that has led to this issue. I know it's hard to connect that to food but are gut is everything to our health.
Damn, i need to call you.