How people get the good jobs | Taylor Doe | TEDxOklahomaCity
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- čas přidán 13. 01. 2023
- In this paradigm shifting talk, Taylor Doe introduces original concepts that will change the way you hear success stories. Asking “How do people get the good jobs?” led him on a journey of qualitative research, interviewing people and analyzing stories about their paths to success. The most insightful and fascinating commonality in these interviews were found in the most unlikely place. The keys to success were hidden behind one recurring phrase in every story… How do people get to where they are in life?
Since graduating from the University of Oklahoma, Taylor Doe (aka TDoe) has lived between, what Martin Luther King Jr. called, the “Two Americas”. He has worked in corporate America at SandRidge Energy, founded a tech company with one of his brothers, and for the last decade has devoted himself to building relationships and community initiatives in Northeast Oklahoma City. He has done all this while straddling two economic classes, which has given Taylor unique insights on how opportunity is unlocked for some and remains locked for others.
His recent work invites listeners to unpack what he calls ‘And Then Moments’ - the seemingly overlooked moments in life that actually help people succeed. Taylor believes when people do the work of uncovering these moments, they are then challenged to unlock opportunity for those who have historically been left out. Only then can society begin to create more equitable communities and cities where more people thrive.
His curiosity on topics such as empathy, trust, social capital, and opportunity quickly grew as he juxtaposed his own story of safety nets and unlocked opportunities against stories of those in his community with fewer resources. Taylor believes that trust is the most valuable resource in the world, which drives him to continue to create trust-building opportunities between the “Two Americas”. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
That's why they say " it's not what you know, it's who you know" I'm just now realizing how true that is.
I thought this guy was going to say "you just have to work hard" I don't think I could have handled that sort of brain dead sentiment. I'm glad I watched the whole video. What a great honest guy.
You forgot. Be good looking. And lucky
You don't have to work hard. Just have the right relatives & connections.
@@himoffthequakeroatbox4320 and looks and luck
Haha I thought he was going down that route for a moment as well; I’m satisfied with the actual focal point of this talk.
Nepotism isn't much better.
Yes yes yes. THIS is a great TED Talk. It all boils down to relationships, and this honestly shows why some of the most hard working people will never move up.
It might be, that you have to start with baby-steps, but keep being generous and pay anything good you have experienced forward. Keep your eyes open for kind and generous companionship and circles of friends. Try to improve the atmosphere where ever you are or - lesson learned - move on, and always try to get out of negative environments, step by step. If you know a hard worker, give an honest compliment! If you see a well-earned success, applaude it. Never mind if this person is richer than you or has looked down the nose at you before, just say "well done!" genuinely, with a quick warm smile, and move on.
Many children of successful parents never get so much warm support, that we suppose they have in abundance, but no! Give from a mindset of having enough of all that is really important in life - you are discerning, have worked for good grades, possess a warm heart, stamina, and real friends, so think of yourself as rich and resourceful and a true gem! You recognize a GREAt talk and you express praise for it! All the best always to you. Your best time is ahead, when *you* share lots of keys! 🙂
It is easy to move up. Just study hard and get into medical school. Then you can easily make $1 million a year or more eventually.
@@jimj2683 There are many ways to move up, but all of them are not advertised much. For young boys it is vital that they get clear about, that what employers want you to have in exchange for a good job, is not what is asked of a cool gang member.
You don't need and probably will not thrive aiming for an ivy league education. Take advice from your local community college, *and then* sandwich courses and job practice and you'll have a good long term plan. Studying, competing hard and choosing medical school is not for everybody. Do ask generous, thriving grown-ups for not ideologically biased good advice, that's my tip!
@@jimj2683you have to start studying medical in high school, then do four years of school, and then most likely an extra four just to get a chance of having a good job, and then it’ll take probably another 3-5 years before you start making good money
which works against a meritocracy of course. many relationships are more about political alliances and these are used to undermine others who have practice skills and talents. network effects play into this (the sheer gravity that a group of people have).
OMG. THIS. The best, nicest, most honest video I've seen about how people really move up in America. This also jibes perfectly with an article I read about a study that showed that the richer and more powerful a person gets, the more likely they are to attribute that success only to their own inherent skills/intelligence/work- ignoring, forgetting or just downplaying the "keys" they've been given by others.
THIS IS WHY YOUR NETWORK IS YOUR NETWORTH!
Before going to sleep each night, I recall all the names of those who have helped me as well as the ones who are helping me now.
I’m truly honored and blessed to have had T-Doe helping me through doors. You’re definitely a continuous and then moment for me and a few of my other peers. This was awesome.
A wonderful sentiment. 🙏🏽wish you well
I´m glad to hear people trully honest like this guy who tells things as they really are instead of repeating the brainwash marketing tales we constantly hear; the story about "winners" who have worked "hard" to get MONEY!! that means the are "successfull" (are they really succssful for getting money?). These storyes made more harm than anything else. The majority of people I know really work hard without connections, end up feeling frustrated or depressed thinking they is something wrong with them, that they have not worked hard enough. And the reallity is very different. Our youngsters end up byuing those stories and since a very young age end up deprressed at the prospects they se ein life, specially when they do not have connections.
I encourage people to follow the advice given here. Share your keys with people who usually don´t have much opportunities. You´ll be trully surprised at the results!!!
Taylor, you took something complex and broke it down so beautifully. This was one of the best Tedx Talks I’ve heard
While connections can do a lot for you, taking initiative can do a lot too. Taking initiative can sometimes be scary and feel risky, but it can also lead to good jobs, good connections, and sometimes good education. It can be hard to do, but it is not impossible.
I started on a horticulture education, despite not knowing anyone in it, and I was offered an apprenticeship at a company where I didn't know anyone. It has to be said that in my country, education is free, so I'm not without help, but it is still up to me to take advantage of the opportunities I have.
Taking initiative can be many things: Meeting new people, applying for a better job, signing up for an education, applying for scholarships and so on. Some people call it risk-taking, since a lot of the initiatives that make a difference are scary.
taking initiative is easy actually. e.g. applying to 500+ jobs , doing loads of interviews, facing rejections along the way but not giving up ever. alas of course no one cares about initiative and it comes down to who likes who the most. no one is there to give you credit for your initiatives, regardless of the grind. they are there to make you jump through their hoops and then choose their friends instead.
@@elcapitan6126 What you describe sounds simple more than easy, it is harder to do than it sounds. The point of initiative is that you have to be out there and let people know you exist, no one will choose you or help you if they don't even know you exist.
People who have advantageous friendships also get those friends from somewhere, they don't meet those people in their own home. Someone had to be somewhere and start a conversation for a friendship to form.
I have just realized the presence of locked opportunity inside of my company, and how important it is to enrich your friendship circle.
This is also why we need to encourage shy introverted kids and people. I felt that I was too afraid to make relationships and connections when I was younger. And I think that really set me back. But it's good information now. I'm starting to work in a new company pretty low on the totem pole and I know I need to make connections and network all those things.
Taylor Doe showed the KEYS to the real opportunities in real life.....THE BEST TED TALKS for me by far.......
Taylor Doe reminded me why I love and credit teachers. Teachers are an inspiration to our children ❤🌹
And yet we treat them like indentured servants
This TED Talk made me cry for what entails and because it made grow intellectually.
Literally chills. I've been saying this my whole life.
In college I could sense defensiveness from other students who grew up with more keys and and-then moments than me when they could sense that I had less than them. It was as if they felt I was attacking them by sharing my adversities in hopes of them sharing their and-then moments or keys. Only very few people openly shared their and-then moments. Even less shared any keys.
My goal is to get better at relationships. I’m not too bad at it, I just need to put in the effort. And hope to share with friends and family
Yes! Thanks for writing that out. Coming across that defensiveness was a source of frustration for me, and at the time I didn't have any words for that experience, but you totally nailed it.
@@daphne2185 Thank you! This video helped me word it out. I stopped talking about my adversities in general. People prefer to hear “success stories”. Unless they ask, I’ll let them know. That’s when I feel it has a bigger impact. I think in the past I might have come off as playing the victim, so a better way to share it is in a brief and neutral manner/tone.
"And then moments" Me too have plenty of them. I feel grateful.
This reminds me of a saying I heard as a child “its not about what you know, its about who you know”
i know Jesus and i know God. That is a good start, right?
After watching this Ted talk, I just imagined my whole journey starting from my play school to my current job at an MNC.
Really, this guy just helped me figure out something I forgot to be grateful
Thank you
I had no idea this would be the most impactful CZcams video I'd ever see.
Tedx did they damn thing with this one. Bring him back! he's amazing.
All people share “keys” with people they like and those that make them feel important. No one just tosses them around, it’s not up the the world to help, it’s up to each individual to learn and grow. At that point you decide who you share your “keys” with. You must learn to make relationships and avenues will open for you.
Its not about "tossing around" a lot of the examples he gave these people had personal relationships with the people who gave them jobs.
If you don't live in the same community or have access to even build relationships with the people who will give you opportunities then how are you supposed to do it?
If people want to give the keys to those who make them feel "important" it shouldn't be that difficult to help others as that will also make you feel good. This is the type of action that elevates society. If you want others to get out of their bubble, you can do the same.
This video took an unexpected, appreciative turn. Thank you for sharing these important points in unlocking opportunities for ALL people.
No one should appreciate nepotism.
Most definitely underrated Ted Talk
Keys are available at the State Fair, Ag Shows, 4H clubs and many social functions. All a person needs to do is go, make connections with the people at the booths. Those people have keys.
Thank you, I don't know why but I wanted to cry during your TedTalk. Maybe because I help people to find employment and I'm part of those and those moments. And of course, now I notice I have my own to share. Thank you! Excellent talk!
The “good jobs” usually go to friends and family first. Its who you know and not always about skill or intellect or work ethics. There is no longer an “American dream”. Hard work is no guarantee today. Sad.
It was never a guarantee. It's even common for workplaces to have overblown quotas for bonuses so that you never get one.
Isn’t that how it should be
@@EsotericallyWikkedreally? You prefer a nepotistic world where only people born in to affluent families are successful
I’ve been trying for about 15 years to get one of the good jobs, even with interning and special projects and all this extra free work, forget it. I just don’t have any relatives to promote me.
😐@@EsotericallyWikked
Connections are everything for the top 1%, and they obviously always make things easier. And yet, for the "normal" good jobs most people I know, myself included, just went to college, got good grades, applied through the usual channels and got a job, so connections aren't necessary beyond enough family support to get into and through college
Btw, I did try to use a relatively close connection to a CEO in a big corporate and they still didn't hire me straight out of college, a different big company did
Well, let's think of relationships and connections as chances, not guarantees. It doesn't hurt to try, and then if it hurts, let's not forget, and then share a few keys with others, because we know what it can mean! I'm glad you shared your story, because as a retired teacher, I know that school and studies can open opportunities for the students. Good grades are proof of a mindset that many employers look for.
Far too often we hear "just work hard, I did" as if the poor are at fault for being poor. As if poverty is a choice. So thankful to hear the proof that hard work is often simply not enough. It helps. But it's not enough.
a hopeful and grateful attitude paired with a willingness to continue to show up and work hard over and over, even when there's no guarantees (there rarely are), makes a world of difference
Yes, it is a combination of personal effort and external opportunities. Just like fishing, we need to have the fishing gear and technique, but all of it is no use if there are no fish in the water.
@@CW91 fantastic metaphor thank u
Taylor is the real deal, and seeing this live in OKC had all our eyes leaking. He does everything (and more) than he’ll ever say, because he’s a humble dude who loves his kids and community. So proud of you!
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Great and needed message Taylor! Some of these comments make it clear that there's still a lot of work to do to get others to understand the need FOR EVERYONE to share our keys (especially to the marginalized people groups)!! I'm proud to call you friend.
this is what being humble + honest looks like. success never happens alone. opportunities r privileges that should be afforded to all. meritocracy is an illusion. opportunities r given based on proximity. this is going to change how i frame my own career because i definitely was just lucky a lot of the time.
Thanks Taylor for your good and clear message. It's true your network is your net worth...
And so, it is. I am glad you said it as it is Taylor Doe. Thank you!
Powerful message Taylor, providing an opportunity to take inventory on our own "and then" moments - and reflect on the impact. Lots of training in corporate America now around unconscious bias (and the impact), which opens eyes to some of what you have discussed here. Actions must follow. Well done!
CONNECTIONS GET THE GOOD JOBS I KNEW THAT BEFORE WATCHING VIDEO
I needed this video so badly. Thank you for being there to film and share Taylor's talk and thank God for Taylor.
I always thought Connectivity related jobs were unfair. Taylor Doe Found a positive impact of it instead. Thank you So much.
Incredibly powerful talk. Thank you Taylor.
Top 5 factors to success, from least to most important:
1: Luck
2: Connections
3: Wealth you already had
4: ruthlessness
5: hard work
I got 4 and 5
Outstanding TED talk! Great narrative that connects relationships and workforce opportunities. Remember the timeless saying, “it’s not what you know, it’s WHO you know”.
Inspire me to share my story and be vulnerable 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Great Job, I love the new perspective I gained. Keys compound the more generous we are, we need to be willing to distribute our keys to help others become successful. I also really liked your slides. Very minimal and had nothing excessive. Keep up the Good Work Tyler!!!
Taylor, powerful talk..."connections"👏
Thank you for your TEDxTalk!Great success to hear...❤️👨❤️👨😍🖐
Really good talk. Probably cause he's humble
Literally no one has ever unlocked opportunity for me except my parents. I don't have any And Then moments. But I've certainly given MANY to others.
Well, sh...t happens, but do keep up goog deeds - the pandemic will ebb out and new chances will open up for you! In which way did those you helped made themselves deserve your help? How did they show themselves ungrateful? Share your experience, please, I think we can learn a lesson or two, don't hold back. Help open eyes!
@@DNA350ppm they made themselves deserving of my help by merely existing and being nice people.
@@Retrosenescent That was very well done by you! Kudos! Do you ever ask another person for a little help, or are you very independent?
I sincerely wish that you one day will be receiving both the pleasure of receiving and giving, as both bring the happy feeling of connection! You seem a very generous person, and as such probably more giving than taking - and then you are the salt of the Earth, and do make the world so much better, so I hope you can keep it up without disappointment as there should be many more like you. 🙂
Man when he mentioned the "and then" moments!
Best Ted Talk I ever heard! Thank you so much Taylor for this. This really opened my eyes.
Tedx videos are always amazing,
Every video has something that we can learn
Taylor Doe u changed my world man , thankyou so much
What an incredible talk. If only that top 1% would listen and share their keys rather than taking their keys to lock the doors behind them.
My biggest takeaway: Nurture new relationships, never burn bridges, also think of how you can unlock doors for others.
I am reading a book, "The Psychology of Money," where Bill Gates also has an "and then" moment as in his school there was a computer. However, I also have lots of "and then" moments, and I am grateful for all of them.
So well spoken! Definitely saving this one.
PERFECT TALK. THANK U SO MUCH Taylor😍
Love authenticity! ❤
This is one of the most amazing Ted talks I've seen. It has definitely unlocked my interest for social science. Thanks!
Eh? I'm 55 and I never got any job through knowing someone. I just applied for the first one and that led on to the second. I was the first person in my family to go to university - my parents were supportive and encouraging but had no information to give me and looking at my friends most of us were the same
My story is similar. I'm almost 50 and grew up in a poor and dysfunctional family. They actually tried to hold me back from success. But I did the same as you, just plugged along getting better and better jobs and paid for my college while working full time. Eventually ended up with several degrees. I pursued jobs and degrees based on what they paid and whether they were in demand or not. Not because they were enjoyable, cool or my life's passion. It was hard work and perseverance. Had nothing to do with connections or "keys".
SOOO GOOD! This advice is priceless. Thank you, Tia!
Thanks for sharing the motivational talk with us man. We appreciate it!
Such a wonderful talk!
I love the word (KEY) & (RELATIONSHIP) nowadays you need to have those otherwise there will be a zero opportunity for you
I’m happy I took the time to watch this 🥺💯
This is a generous and honest story that will unlock many minds
One of the greatest Ted Talks I've watched
Fantastic insight, Taylor! This was such a great talk.
Much required topic, well presented 👍
❤ amazing ! Love this ! Thank you .
To put simply, NETWORKING IS GOLD!
Opportunities are unlocked through Relationships
Apik iki, sae keteranganmu Mas. Tak simak yo "and then" iki nek nok nggonaku jenenge "bejo" Mas. Yowis dungo dinungo yo kabeh. Salam seko Jowo (Java).🙂
that was an absolute brilliant TED talk!
Wow, thanks for sharing this! If anything, it inspires me to try to collect more keys and put myself out there.
Awesome talk sir and thanku for sharing such worthy piece of advice.. Much needed 😇
awesome talk , i think one of the best this year
Relationships unlock Opportunities.!
If you understand and appreciate the concept this guy explains here, you can be sure you'd love the book Outliers by Malcom Gladwell.
Thanks for sharing this masterpiece!
A little nuance to all this is that your “and then” connection has to think you have the skills and capability to perform the job before they pass your name along. If you get hired and do a poor job, it damages the reputation of the person that recommended you. So to benefit from connections, you first have to make yourself into the kind of person they feel safe recommending.
So good you spelled this prerequisite out! It makes all the difference, and remember, also people who are equals can be keys for others!
It's not true that when we meet new people we get more opportunities. It may be true, don't get me wrong. But it's equally true that there are a LOT of people who don't share opportunities with you. I see so many examples of where people don't help you. They don't give you connections. Coworkers don't teach and train you how to do your job better. They don't suggest books or courses. They don't tell you these are the steps which lead you to what you want. I can see the massive potential for growth if this was not the way it is but this social mobility needs to be talked about in context with social stagnation and what might be called de-growth or atrophy.
When I was a teen in grade 10, my parents were split up. I had one too many arguments with my dad so I asked my mom if I could move in with her, which meant moving to a nearby town and attending a new high school. Two guidance councillors told me we don't teach computers in this grade, the same material is for grade 11 here. So they wanted me not to attend that class and offered me gym instead. They wanted me to take the 4 year level of classes instead of the 5 year level classes I was taking in the previous school. They didn't say it was because I didn't have the ability. They didn't think I would attend university so it would be a waste. I attended the wrong English class for almost the whole first semester (another male student and I were the only boys in this otherwise all girl class of grade 11 students) before I was assigned the proper class. That teacher failed me two years in a row. I never graduated from high school and I still struggle a lot with getting better work. I'm not starving but I'm definitely not thriving either. When I told my dad I wanted to move in with my mom, he said, why don't you move out on your own like I did (when he was 14). That seemed preposterous to me at the time. I was unaware of many social safety nets available to me. I later learned about a 14 year old girl whose parents wanted to move to another town but she wanted to stay and finish her high school. She got government assistance and a place to stay that totalled to be a lot of money. I'm happy for her but I know there are so many opportunities I missed. About this pair of guidance councillors, when I protested, saying I wanted to just continue with the courses I had, they asked why I moved to this new town. I said my dad always argued with me. They said, usually parents advocate for a student (to get what I wanted). My mom was informed of their decisions but never followed up on it and I just kinda took it as there was nothing I could do. I just felt helpless. I know now, many decades later, I was not helpless, I just didn't know how to go about getting what I wanted. And I was surrounded by a lot of people who also didn't know how to help me get what I wanted. So your video presentation strikes a strong cord with me, going back to when I was a kid.
One thing about me. If I learned these skills of building a social network and facilitating fit and growth for people, I would not keep this knowledge to myself or share it just with a few close people. At work on my breaks, I read a lot of books about communication, like Chris Voss Never Split The Difference, the many books by John Maxwell, on and on. And when people ask me what I'm reading, I show them. I lend books to them. I share videos and TED talks with them. There are of and on maybe 15 people from Afghanistan who work where I work. I shared about how Daryl Davis convinced directly and indirectly over 300 people to leave the KKK. They never heard of the KKK. But they heard of the Taliban and are convinced nothing will change the Taliban or Afghanistan. But I keep sharing quotes, videos, books with them hoping one day they get the bug to read voraciously, like I do. It can be really hard for myself to change, harder for me to influence others to improve themselves. But I haven't given up. How do I learn more?
Thanks for writing this man. I wish I had or hope to find people like you around me. I am not going to lie , I am one of those people who don't tell or share things with others. However, deep inside I know I am not that type of person. It is just hard when even your closest relatives treat opportunities like a guarded secret. And to those who I do share, it never is reciprocated.
Thanks for writing brother.
I feel that text so much! I continue helping others eventhough they wouldn‘t do the same for me. There‘s so much potential going to waste otherwise…
You’re amazing. Please stay your course. Take the leaps you need to take. Thrive!
Thanks for the talk, its nice to see a good human these days. I didn't realize how this worked with who you know err "keys" never had any, always at the wrong place at the right time. 🤔 🔑♻️☮️
Wish you many new chances - all the support conceivable, and continued good cheer and strong faith in the best!
Connections... is what you need 💯
That was good TEDx speech, like I really hear something new
There’s something compassionate about this man’s voice😊...respek!
What a fantastic talk
As an international student, this is too real
I love Ted talks and the power they have to inform, educate, and inspire. This is the best talk I’ve heard in a long time. Not because it resonated with me but because it inspired me, a middle aged international educator, to share my story again and to build more “and then moments. Thank you!
Also, where is Damarion now?
He's a Freshman at the University of Oklahoma.
@@bryanclifton God bless you real for good Bryan Clifton.
What a great show 😢
You're awesome Te
On my opinion this a presentation very inspiring .. I was remembering Like I was attend schooling my teacher have gave a matery about all sorts of job .. By chance I'm studies in nurse assistant program but I'm not return in my knowledge to a job .. Started from here I'm thinking about what I do after it " after graduate " and then I had remember she's said if finding a great job needed SWOT analyst like a entrepreneurship .. Started from here I'm tried applying SWOT analyst n apply for job on all sorts of job .. And then I got a job n I have relationships n be acquainted with "human resources development" in one company to else companies.. As far as I got a job in my passion.. Instead hypothetically result know skills very influential to a person be sides increased connection with someone else ... Instead Don't stop to here still opened your knowledge about your passions ..
love this talk!
Best ted talk ever 😯👏 Amazing!
Very very good speech!!
I shared this with my "and then" person. Thanks!
Most successful people truly believe their success is due to something they personally did, when actually it was help from someone else. It's human nature.
Awesome! Thank you!
Years ago I connected my student to a good career path. I didn't have any contacts but I knew from experience that she was exactly the age and background the companies were looking to hire. She was hired and became very successful in her job in pharmaceutical sales.
So good I had to re-watch it one more time.😅😂😢🎉
And then I found Ted X on CZcams. Thank you Ted X for your stories, lessons and generosity.