Who are the Gamma Quadra? | Wayfarers : INTJ, ENTJ, ESFP, ISFP | CS Joseph

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  • čas přidán 21. 08. 2024

Komentáře • 747

  • @CSJoseph
    @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +240

    Everyone is biased. Everyone is a hypocrite. Everyone is prejudiced. I am no different.
    I would be foolish to think otherwise.
    When it came to the recent Wayfarer lecture, I had to find a place to list that much criticism since it was long overdue. Often times I am accused by almost everyone for being overly negative and hating on one specific type. Wayfarers are my Golden Quadra and one could argue that I know their flaws more than most people. But take notice, I have spent many lectures praising them. Telling INTJs they are the jack of all trades, masters of all. Telling ESFPs they can be the most brilliant mathematicians and engineers. Telling ISFPs their ability to take charge and min/max a factory assembly line to get closer to perfecting operations and the ENTJ's penchant for artistic capabilities (like film making) is unmatched.
    The point is, I realized I had not spent enough time addressing the negatives. This was true when Railgun exposed my bias early on in our relationship. That's what ESTPs do, they expose. It took me longer to release the Wayfarer lecture because of the need to gather the criticisms and convey them as such. I will admit that it is difficult to do so given all the positives and negatives of my past. Furthermore, my personal psychological prejudices (such as being prejudiced against concrete types, which is entirely natural for any abstract type to do) were also exposed in the process.
    Just because I offer criticism, does not mean that I do not love or respect you. Just because I expose the things that one does not want exposed, does not mean that I do not love or respect you. I had to spend so much time being exposed myself and being married to the one type that is the most adept at exposure; it is like a endless date with the gallivanting beauty known as humility herself.
    Wayfarer's have a purpose and that purpose is to utilize their personal freedom for the sake of achievement. Put differently that means they are treasure hunters. Freedom to pursue treasure and the freedom to choose who to share it with is their purpose. This is why they create tools for themselves to aid them in their pursuit. I would like to point out that Wayfarers, in their pursuits have a tendency to steal instead of earn. Even the mature ones can do this. This is the main premise behind my lecture.
    I did not offer many positives (praise?) in this lecture because I have already said them previously in other lectures and because I am leading up to another lecture, which will be episode 10, released after Delta's episode 9. In episode 10, I will be identifying some additional shared strengths and weaknesses, especially in the areas of covert contracts that are shared among all Quadras. Episode 10 will be taking a somewhat friendlier tone.
    Don't be afraid, there is a method to the madness. If you are offended by my work, I understand. Even my own Quadra, the Alphas, sent me letters of complaint over the content of the lecture and claimed I was being alienating. Anytime anyone speaks with candor, someone will feel alienated. I cannot show favoritism. I have to risk being alienating for the sake of candor. I am thankful for those of you who are Wayfarers and see the value behind my words within this now controversial lecture. It is for you that I do this work, albeit for free. He who has an ear let him hear.
    I freely admit that I am biased. But just because someone is biased, does not mean one cannot speak with candor. Even biased people can speak objective truth. Even a young adult can speak the objective truth. Even a teenager can tell the objective truth. Even a boy can tell the objective truth. Bias is just this thing people use to measure the subjective value known as credibility. Credibility is one affiliative thing I do not care for. The stuff I say either makes sense or it doesn't, regardless of someone's values or feelings. Welcome to Te critic. Mine is much more harsh, welcome to INTJ focused ENTP.
    I said this earlier today and I will say it again. Everyone is biased. Everyone is a hypocrite. Everyone is prejudiced. I am no different. I guess what does make me different is that I am sincere about it. Sure, you may label me this person who just speaks about impressions from others instead of showing how or why. The thing is that impressions need to be addressed. Impressions of other's behavior is necessary because everyone has struggled in their lives to understand how they themselves come off or show to others externally from themselves.
    These impressions come from our nature and nurture as a direct result. Do you honestly believe that I walk around thinking all Wayfarers behave this way on a daily basis? Hell no. The truth is that I walk around thinking all Wayfarers have the potential to behave this way and it needs to be discussed.
    People assume I was too easy on Alphas or the Templars. I do venture to ask this question: is it possible that Alphas or Templars just didn't feel the need to voice their opinion? Te users have this thing where they don't like their voice being taken away from them, or have their voice squelched out by others. They are more sensitive to it. Ti users will eventually force the issue to be listened to but only in situations where they know they are right. This is why they are inherently less sensitive. I mean hell, I told Templars they were potential pathetic hypocrites. They took it in stride and I am thankful.
    Deltas are next up and I can assure this community will understand that they will probably have it just as hard as the other Quadras. Especially when we get into some really heinous topics that will be brought up about the Delta Quadra. It will be a painful but necessary lecture. But again, fear not because episode 10 will tie it all together with a positive ending for each Quadra.
    Regardless, I would like to thank the community for their candor towards me. I was called out for Ad Hominem. (A fair criticism, just note that it was intentional on my part and done in the spirit of fairness) I was called out for poor delivery. (A fair criticism, I am not the best at delivery) I was called out for being insensitive. (A fair criticism, but I have to sacrifice sensitivity for the sake of candor). I was called out for being biased, prejudiced, and a hypocrite. Fair criticisms all the way across the board. But so also is every single human being who suffers with the "human condition." These are areas where fellow human beings are not different but closely united.

    • @Riiiiiingo
      @Riiiiiingo Před 4 lety +21

      I mean just the way you calmly spoke to that struggling to convey her point INTJ shows that you dont hate us. + Some ppl put too much weight on their type and forget to keep an open mind. I dont wanna sound like a buttlicker, I just think that so far information you gave was consistent and fair.

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +12

      much appreciated

    • @Hybe123
      @Hybe123 Před 4 lety +29

      The reason I got into your videos and this whole typology is because you were frank about peoples types. All I heard before that was fluffy MBTI information saying how wonderful I am like some horoscope BS indicating they have a potential agenda to sell me stuff, be that ideas or MBTI courses etc.
      I ask all gamma quadra types to say what they think about other gamma quadra types and you'll probably say the same thing. I can count on one hand the people I know from gamma quadra that I deem really good and mature people and I can count a hell of a lot more people that I can't stand because they're shallow and overall self absorbed. And when you think about it, what makes me think they don't think the same thing about me? It is the truth, we have a potential to be shallow & ungrateful people and it is up to us to not be that way. Stop being so butthurt about it.

    • @archaised1191
      @archaised1191 Před 4 lety +18

      What is so bad about knowing what you can improve on? I guess the lack of gratitude from gammas shows up in the comments aswell, im happy to use wisdom from this lecture for my future encounters of beloved gammas. :)

    • @koolkrieg
      @koolkrieg Před 4 lety +2

      @Tommy Hass i am so hyped to get my quadra dismantled by joseph :D

  • @Hybe123
    @Hybe123 Před 4 lety +121

    I think INTJs have pretty good mechanisms for self correcting their bad behaviour. My Fi child wouldn't let me live with myself knowing that I caused a marriage to break. It just wouldn't work.
    The thing I have to care about is showing gratitude, I do forget that people actually helped me. I should write that down more.

  • @mcfreezyyaboi8389
    @mcfreezyyaboi8389 Před 4 lety +109

    Stop attacking me
    My plan is to become so self reliant in every facet of life that by the time I'm old and useless I dont need anyone anyways.
    I understand the flaw in my plan, it's still in progress my guy

  • @baaf777
    @baaf777 Před 4 lety +65

    Respect for all who did thank Chase for the roasting comments. Noticed many thank-you comments are from INTJ’s. It fits with how I see my close INTJ friends. Instead of denying, they do an effort to see the perspectives of others and they might find the feed-back useful for their personal growth.

    • @andromaxbse6459
      @andromaxbse6459 Před 3 lety +5

      And just few of ENTJs, they are busy chasing their goal.

  • @borisvandruff7532
    @borisvandruff7532 Před 4 lety +73

    The end of the main lecture was my favorite part, when you suggested that the people who help the Wayfarers find their treasure are the real treasure themselves.
    People are an end, not a means to an end.
    Awesome. This was almost as brutal as the Templar lecture was. Keep telling the truth that not everyone wants to hear, Chase!

  • @yurizafurizaki5574
    @yurizafurizaki5574 Před 3 lety +42

    "NTPs are attracted tô people who are willing to admit and wear their flaws like a badge".
    YESSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

    • @yurizafurizaki5574
      @yurizafurizaki5574 Před 3 lety +8

      They have to be fake to meet their (the gammas) standard.
      You nailed it.

  • @haleffect9011
    @haleffect9011 Před 3 lety +37

    As an INTJ one thing that my mother (ENFP) said which really hit me deeply is this:
    "You are always really effective when YOU decide to do something for other people. But other people also do things for you, sometimes you have to do things which help them on their terms, not yours.
    I don't ever call you when I need help because you only help on your terms. I get that you don't want to be everyone's first port of call when everyone else needs help, I get that you want your freedom,
    but you should at least be the first to help the people who would help you at the drop of a hat."
    Which I guess still rings true for me.

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 3 lety +16

      Your mom's a wise lady.

  • @perpetior
    @perpetior Před 4 lety +116

    The REAL treasure was the friends we made along the way

    • @jankom.7783
      @jankom.7783 Před 4 lety +11

      Real treasure is gold under the mountain. I watched a clip about Smaug (dragon from The Hobbit) few hours ago. Scene describes what C. S. complains about. We keep our treasure to ourselves. Smaug is definitely INTJ. Poor Smaug. It is weird to watch a movie, and relate to a dragon.

    • @anonnymus1227
      @anonnymus1227 Před 4 lety +2

      The reAL treasure is leaving a mark on the world. When they remember your name, your story, your LEGACY, you become immortal.

  • @ayoungprince6771
    @ayoungprince6771 Před 3 lety +50

    When you talk about NTJs and specifically INTJs your perspective is most often focused on the females. That is understandable based off your experience but still, can you please balance this more?

  • @rachelc.riggenbach3109
    @rachelc.riggenbach3109 Před 3 lety +39

    Even tho you made my Fi cry my Te will definitely quote you.

  • @tarvoc746
    @tarvoc746 Před 4 lety +135

    I'm INTJ, and... it's weird. Some things you said seem like comedic exaggerations of traits and flaws I actually display. Some hit pretty close to home, actually. But with some others, I can't identify with at all. For example, I don't think all human interaction is just a transaction, and I think that's a terrible point of view that's sadly become too prevalent today. I also have no habit of self-praise, and in fact, I can't even deal with praise from others too well. I have an easier time dealing with criticism than with compliments.

    • @andrafinley9286
      @andrafinley9286 Před 4 lety +17

      I dont necessarily see all human interactions as transactional, as much as having an exchange of power or dominance. Ijs

    • @jankom.7783
      @jankom.7783 Před 4 lety +14

      When we get compliment, we either refuse it, or take it, and exaggerate it to make joke out of it. Recently I found out, that Fe-Ti often don't get it, and think, that we are serious, because that is, what they often do. Therefore thinking, that we need self-praise. Even in this video, he told us to praise NTPs, in order to have better relationships.

    • @tarvoc746
      @tarvoc746 Před 4 lety

      @@jankom.7783 Hmmmm....

    • @asmanidaulhaq8601
      @asmanidaulhaq8601 Před 4 lety +6

      I don't do human interaction

    • @tarvoc746
      @tarvoc746 Před 4 lety +3

      @The Literal Master Interesting, I'm gonna check it out, thanks. And I don't think analyzing social interactions is necessarily a shallow aspect of psychology, or of cognition theory. It's one important piece of the puzzle among others. But of course, social reductionism (which seems to be what's going on in the video) really is shallow.

  • @perpetior
    @perpetior Před 4 lety +44

    NTJs-mgtow
    SFP- r/femaledatingstrategy

  • @juliebrown1989
    @juliebrown1989 Před 4 lety +24

    ISFP here. Thank you so much for your direct and hard truth about our Quadra. No one has ever called me shallow before and it was incredibly helpful to see that my performance drive /fear of being abandoned if my performance slips, is reflective of a shallow and cynical view of others. I know it's true. I really valued being told "Stop stealing someone else's treasure! Go out and get your own treasure - it shouldn't be that hard for you." Although I've never been the other woman in a relationship, time and again I feel the pull towards that kind of relationship and I needed someone to call me a thief/ pirate, to snap out of it. That's not who I want to be. Your lecture was hard to listen to and so helpful to me. Btw my Dad is an ENTP/ pastor. :)

    • @TokyoTaisu
      @TokyoTaisu Před 2 lety +1

      Talking about ISFP Pirate girls: Everglow - Pirate.... (Yiren ISFP)
      I love you ISFP girls so much I even married one and bring her along for the treasure hunt.
      I think I sort of understand ISFP girls more because of that experience.

  • @aurorebergen2779
    @aurorebergen2779 Před 4 lety +34

    Well, about being shallow... As an ISFP, I must admit I do recognize myself in this performing need and I'm scared to be left if I don't show I'm worth someone wanting to be with me anymore. It's not so much because I think people should prove by performing that they're worth being with them, but because I've always felt like people thought I wasn't good enough personally, and very partly due to my own experiences (bullying, being told I wasn't talented enough, pretty enough, important enough, etc...). I don't think it's really shallow, I think it's internal insecurity and that doesn't mean that's a vision we project on other people. At least, in my own case, I don't know about other people of the Gamma quadra.

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +18

      Very well said. I am stating shallow because this is how it comes off to others. That may not necessarily mean it is the full intent of the Wayfarer.

    • @amazinggreats5333
      @amazinggreats5333 Před 3 lety +4

      @@CSJoseph I feel like you’re saying two different things. In the video you literally say “you ARE shallow.” What else can that mean other than that is who are from inside and out? If you’re gonna go balls to the wall then at least be accurate in what you say. Otherwise what you say in the video loses integrity. Here, it seems like you’re backpedaling. Are we actually shallow or is it just that we seem shallow? Those are two totally different things.

    • @infdox9051
      @infdox9051 Před 2 lety

      @@CSJoseph You don't live under capitalism? Not shallow, survival it is called. It's about survival.

  • @dallyh.2960
    @dallyh.2960 Před 4 lety +30

    "Think all human interaction is just a transaction" Shit, I'm called out. I used that exact line about my thoughts on socializing when talking to a friend once. I still feel it's true, but it's also dehumanizing, cold, and shallow to a level that I hadn't considered.

    • @mohhhhhhhhgjghvcy
      @mohhhhhhhhgjghvcy Před 2 měsíci

      But human interactions are INDEEED transactional, if that person doesn’t make you laugh doesn’t make you feel good or whatever why would you be friend with them? And it is the same the other way around, no one would hang out with you if you don’t bring something positive to their life

  • @taracannon2458
    @taracannon2458 Před 4 lety +30

    As an ISFP I really value the content on your channel. I relish the fact that you don't sugarcoat anything. Everybody deep down knows that they're not perfect, but hearing you actually explain the bits and bobbles of what the worst of me can look like and how to watch out for that- what a rare treat. As an ISFP I just see other channels praising the creativity and reservedness of our style and that touchy feely content does nothing for my self betterment or deeper understanding of myself. I'm slowly going through your videos so I can learn how to interact with the people in my life the way they prefer to be treated. Thank you CS Joseph!

  • @dumbledalfthewizard9486
    @dumbledalfthewizard9486 Před 4 lety +45

    Voldemort is the ultimate wayfarer.
    Gimme all of Britain and immortality, that way I can be sad and alone!

    • @HeroLanding
      @HeroLanding Před 4 lety +1

      Also Gilgamesh.

    • @caim3465
      @caim3465 Před 3 lety +1

      @@HeroLanding everybody is worshipping the Fate franchise.

    • @HeroLanding
      @HeroLanding Před 3 lety +1

      @@caim3465 I have been worshiping Fate for 10 years now.
      I loved the novel. UBW and Zero are top anime quality, but I understand if it is not your genre.

    • @caim3465
      @caim3465 Před 3 lety +1

      @@HeroLanding lol, I just don't care much about it, only watched F\SN when I was like 13 or 14.

    • @HeroLanding
      @HeroLanding Před 3 lety +1

      @@caim3465 and you thought I cared.

  • @opossumprince1681
    @opossumprince1681 Před 4 lety +49

    As an INTJ, I'd like to thank you for this sobering dose of hard cold truth right before 2020

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +2

      you are most welcome

    • @ImmortalGaming551
      @ImmortalGaming551 Před 3 lety +7

      And then 2020 hit...
      Hello INTJ from the past

    • @opossumprince1681
      @opossumprince1681 Před 3 lety +4

      @@ImmortalGaming551 If only we all knew how it would go... maybe that's why they say "hindsight is 2020"

  • @Percival2755
    @Percival2755 Před 4 lety +15

    I have come to realize something.
    For Wayfarer types (especially NTJs) their happiness comes from acheivments and accomplishments. But their joy, contentment, sense of fulfillment comes from something else.
    Service.
    Service to their fellow human beings.
    Now, imagine if they were to combine these two aspects. That would most probably lead to inner peace.

  • @CC88811
    @CC88811 Před 4 lety +38

    This just reminds why I (INTJ) enjoy ENTPs. Always telling it straight. Love the rant. 😆

  • @caymant8959
    @caymant8959 Před 4 lety +27

    Someone needs to make a meme of Chase throwing a Victoria Secret model in the dumpster, please. LMAOOOO

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +11

      this has already been done

    • @tootzhieastrid4932
      @tootzhieastrid4932 Před 3 lety +2

      IS THE MEME IN THE FB PUBLIC GROUP? WHERE CAN I SEE IT? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  • @CSJoseph
    @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +63

    An essay due to positive and negative outcry from my Quadra lectures.
    I really have to point out that there seems to be a double standard. I recently released the Wayfarer episode for season 17 on my CZcams channel and it had fast become one of the most controversial releases I have done. The previous two episodes were for logical Ti user psyches. And the next two were for the more sensitive Fi user psyches.
    The outcry of complaining regarding the Wayfarer episode seems to be this double standard. The audience is split evenly between people who appreciate the needed criticism I present verses others who are complaining that I am too harsh.
    Here is my stance on this: Deal with it.
    I have to ask the complainers if they even bothered to watch the Alpha Quadra or the Beta Quadra episodes and noticed me dealing similar punishment to these demographics? Especially the beta Quadra where I tell them publicly and quite directly that at times they can be pathetic.
    Honestly, I am not here to be your mother or create content that your itching ears want to hear. I am here to tell you the truth, whether you like it or not. Why? The truth is that you will benefit from it, if you can take the heat. I cannot comfort you into wisdom.
    I have a theory. Is it possible that the release of these episodes which target specific psychological communities is a good case study that demonstrates people’s first inclination in their emotional reactions? My hypothesis is that it most certainly is.
    The Alphas and the Betas seem to be able to take criticism easier as Fe users, whereas the first episode of the more emotionally sensitive Fi users seem to struggle in this area as I have pointed out in previous content. And yet, my experience is that the Fi users often accuse me of being overly emotional as a result of each time I dare criticize them.
    A more recent funny example would be that some have accused me of complaining about various types due to a perception that I am venting about past relationships of mine. This is false, a cop out and an excuse for these immature Fi users saving face for their precious Te. Sounds shallow to me. (At least from the Wayfarers so far)
    Don’t worry, the Philosophers (the Deltas) will be getting their day in court and most of this audience knows that I have a tendency of going after Delta Quadra with negativity and constructive criticism quite often.
    Furthermore, it is important that this audience understands that I have also been accused (mostly by Delta Quadra) of showing favoritism towards Wayfarer types as my Golden Quadra. I doubt they too have bothered to watch each episode pertaining to Wayfarers in order to verify this false belief. Honestly, it sounds very catty to me. Why? Because it is very natural for any human being to only watch content that pertains to just them and not the rest.
    Therefore, I cannot help but conclude that this outcry is as a result of their own inherent bias. Don’t forget, I never claim to be unbiased. It amazes me that on an almost daily basis that people I encounter in this community claim to be unbiased. There is a universal truth: everyone is a hypocrite, everyone is biased.
    Deal with it.

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +8

      @@MarkyMark2177 what I am doing is taking responsibility for my flaws in a public manner. This shows that I am merely human and makes me a real person. Is this wrong?

    • @Dogspit99
      @Dogspit99 Před 4 lety +2

      dude sweet

    • @ADJL1331
      @ADJL1331 Před 4 lety +13

      I don't get the outrage, you either accept the criticism if you indeed posess the negative traits discussed in the lecture so you can actually better yourself as a person, or if you are above the criticism, then don't take offence, congrats, you're more mature than most people in your quadra. If even a Ti demon like me can understand this, so can everybody else. (swear I don't mean this as Fi hero virtue signaling btw)

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +8

      @@MarkyMark2177 I won't disagree with you that it is not a good moral decision to say deal with it. You may be tired of giving me a hard time but I am also tired of telling people the same thing over and over which is why I went the "expedient" route and said deal with it. I am not saying you are wrong. I may be wrong in my delivery but I am 100% real.

    • @ADJL1331
      @ADJL1331 Před 4 lety

      @@MarkyMark2177 Well I wasn't replying to you and neither was I talking about your reply, which I didn't read beforehand, but I do get your issue being different than what I was talking about

  • @muhammadhadi88
    @muhammadhadi88 Před 3 lety +7

    ISFP here.
    Thank you very much CSJ. You have completely destroyed my belief. I remembered getting upset when someone else gets something, and I don't get anything. Now, I'm in a state of disbelief, due to the realisation that I still do this.
    Will practise self-discipline to avoid doing this unhealthy habit, this "stealing things and getting treasure from someone else" habit. Now, I just put my head down whenever I'm in public, to avoid the "fake it till you make it" habit. I am aware that I have the ability to perform for others. But what good is it, if you perform non stop, but when you stop perform due to health, who do you turn to ? The answer is exactly what you said in this video. You're the best.

  • @sirbradfordofhousejones
    @sirbradfordofhousejones Před 3 lety +6

    The hardest part of being a treasure hunter is that you are never satisfied. The hunt never ends. It is depressing when you finally slow down and realize it is pointless.

    • @shoeberrypie
      @shoeberrypie Před 2 lety +1

      After hunting for treasure in solid, Mesopotamian dungeons for a while; you’ll find that the ultimate treasures are the adobe buildings themselves.
      Modern architecture has completely lost touch ever since the Dark Ages and never recovered. In fact it only got worse
      Build sacred environments for both plants and animals

  • @joelleblanc8670
    @joelleblanc8670 Před 4 lety +45

    Used to be a fan, but so tired of the mocking tones, and general sense if mean spiritedness and superiority IMO that comes through so often. Always recommend your channel to others till now, but think I'll unfollow for a while.

    • @joelleblanc8670
      @joelleblanc8670 Před 4 lety +16

      @Rubix Cube did it sound as though it was? No I've followed Chase for a long long time, because his information is good. He really is very good. But being mocking doesnt help the sharing or communication of his knowledge it only hinders it. And just my personal opinion of course. If no one else is bothered, cool beans. Carry on.

    • @andrafinley9286
      @andrafinley9286 Před 4 lety +18

      I'm an INTJ and I NEED more people to talk directly to me like this. It happens so little because I act exactly the way CSJ is describing.
      I actually crave it to the point of bringing it into the bedroom

    • @kian1941
      @kian1941 Před 4 lety

      I mean Se demon is all about mocking and specially with the ENTPs , they use the icy sword of truth so it's meant to sting and last and linger and personally as an INFJ I could always use some of that whether I like it or not.

    • @joelleblanc8670
      @joelleblanc8670 Před 4 lety +24

      Wow, super glad I dont feel I *need* someone to mock me and disrespect me in order for me to grow. Wow. Never realized people felt that way. I guess I've been lucky with teachers and colleagues who help me see myself in a way that is both truthful and compassionate. But of course, compassion is hard, and mocking is easy. Such a shame I'm too sensitive for these harsh truths... i should have learned to be insensitive.. because that's what we need more of, insensitive people who feel they need disrespecting and shaming in order to be helped... oh well, learned my lesson. Thanks y'all. I'm out. I'll go work on becoming more callous (or something? )

    • @scartdarcy
      @scartdarcy Před 4 lety +7

      @Rubix Cube do you have a fetish or something? A guy talking loudly and mocking you makes it easier to get information or anything like that?

  • @loanwolfintj2041
    @loanwolfintj2041 Před 4 lety +17

    Wow intj here you just confirmed a lot of things for me this is gold thank you for this vid learning so much for 2020 clear vision.

  • @slowmo3502
    @slowmo3502 Před 4 lety +23

    So right, my mother (esfp) always tells me to be grateful to other people and share what you have with them if you don't want to be alone

  • @3linkin10
    @3linkin10 Před 4 lety +12

    Thanks, i find this very useful and informative. Although at first, i had a hard time to understand what exactly do you mean by us wayfarers being shallow (i am an INTJ) and thinks that others are just as "shallow" as us. But i came to realize that in reality it's just as you said, i judge my own performance and fear that people will leave me when i make mistakes. Then ended up judging my self worth by my own standard, so afraid of being seen as worthless and flawed. I once went as far as leaving my circle over a mistake that i made because i felt so unworthy to be with them anymore. Completely oblivious to the fact that they're kinda okay with it and kept contacting me. I really need to be grateful for the people who made my life as nice as it is and helped me with my goals and appreciate them properly.
    great content.

  • @fayhill6054
    @fayhill6054 Před 3 lety +10

    Such a fitting description: The Coquette is the kind of seducer who leads a person on without offering instant gratification. Their modus operandi is to delay satisfaction alternating between unexplained warmth and coldness so that the victim stays in a state of anticipation not knowing what is coming next. They play on the human psychology knowing that anything that is easily available to humans is not necessarily valued. Hence, they create a persona of being unavailable and this generates excitement in their audience. Coquettes are somewhat narcissistic as well and have no qualms in making their victims pursue them relentlessly. They create a sense of insecurity in their targets and when they reach the brink, they pull them back with show of warmth and attention. They play with emotions swinging between love and hate.

  • @haneen834
    @haneen834 Před 4 lety +20

    I’m an esfp, interesting that i have never been in a relationship because I always thought i had to preform well enough to keep it, honestly didn’t come to my mind as it being shallow, believed it was normal that people are in a relationship to gain something out of it, and 1:07:00 mentioning not knowing the consequences of my action was so on point it hurts.

    • @amazinggreats5333
      @amazinggreats5333 Před 3 lety +1

      I’m an ESFP too! It also never occurred to me that other people really do hold the deeper stuff as a higher priority. I never thought it was shallow because when all you know is the shallow end of the pool, how can you know anything else? I had surprised pikachu face when he made those points.
      I don’t think I’m shallow though because although sometimes I do like to dress up and I like to be the most witty in conversation, I also actively try to work against those so that people aren’t super attracted to me because they think they can get something out of me. So sometimes I’ll wear sweats, and I’ll avoid talking about the societal “achievements,” and 90% of the time I don’t wear makeup in public. I figure that if I want someone to like me for me, I should be who I really am, the me stripped of achievements and outward beauty.

  • @ryanrobb621
    @ryanrobb621 Před 4 lety +21

    First of all, I really love the progression of this video. >>Wayfairers: NTJ,s SFPs>>I’ve had to spend a little bit more time on preparing this lecture, because they’re actually very misunderstood.>>They’re just a bunch of ungrateful, presumptuous, shallow, greedy, douche-pirates!>> Any questions?
    Nice lol
    As with all of your videos that apply to me, at first I kept thinking, “I am definitely not like that, am I?” , but then I was like “oh yeah, mmhmm….yep.. Yeah, I’ve definitely done that.”
    You’re totally right in this video. That being said, I’d just like to take the time to thank you for all of the effort you have gone through to share your compilation of knowledge and analyses of that information. It has honestly allowed me make sense of people. I admit, I was a much shittier person before I started to learn about this science. It really took someone else to directly point out my flaws for me to see them and, in turn, work on them. No joke, I’m much happier, and much more positive, and actually more productive than before. And I actually do show much more gratitude to everyone in my life now.
    I'm definitely still a work in progress, but you sincerely have changed my life for the better and I appreciate you, and I’ll never forget everything you’ve taught me. I mean, I’ll forget at least some of it of course, but not most of it. So.. thanks a lot!
    SIDENOTE TO OTHER xNTJ/xSFPs
    :
    You should really listen to this. Don’t get defensive and shut down your ability to analyze.. Also, don’t get defensive because I said don’t get defensive *knowing look*
    Take a step back, and really try to think about whether or not each attribute he points out has applied to you at least once in your life. Then when you want to be honest with yourself and allow yourself to see “well maybe there was that ONE time”, challenge yourself and try to think of all the other times in your life that it has applied. I think you’ll gain a new perspective on yourself real quick. Furthermore, the next time you mess up, hear me out, just try telling someone about it. Just try it, it’s great. You’ll see most of the mistakes you think you need to hide are no big deal and telling someone is freeing. The more you do it, the less anxiety and pressure you’ll feel in general. Own your flaws. Own your mistakes. Life is much less stressful when you stop living the lie of trying to present yourself as perfection..

  • @diyab1056
    @diyab1056 Před 4 lety +9

    I hate how everyone calls me selfish...it's a natural instinct for me to protect what I own. I remember throwing tantrums as a kid if my brother so much as touched any of my books or toys. And my bf called me selfish yesterday because I wouldn't give him a painting I made to hang on his wall, what's the deal. Pretty glad that he wanted it tho :p

  • @zenithgreyhatENTJ
    @zenithgreyhatENTJ Před 3 lety +5

    As an ENTJ. Thank you for all that. I would have never been able to understand all this personality stuff if it wasn’t for you. My social life as a whole improved.
    The more I listened the video, the more I realize how far I’ve come in my journey and I’ve always desired to share my life and success to people. I’m so glad that this stuff is not something I struggle with anymore

  • @missphilosophie
    @missphilosophie Před 4 lety +8

    I embrace my wayfaring with vigour! If there was no superficiality nobody would be striving to get anywhere. In addition CS Jospeh we do give back, we give inspiration, knowledge and a practicle example what is out there for you once you harness and take ownership of your skills. Wayfarers are the Jone's that everybody watches but secretly tries to keep up with and the Jone's notice nobody.

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +4

      this is 100% correct. Just don't steal treasure, focus on earning it.

    • @missphilosophie
      @missphilosophie Před 4 lety +3

      C.S. Joseph yes I agree, but we can’t steal something that is ours. You get in life what you bargain for and wayfarers it seems are better than most in that aspect.

  • @ParadoxEngineer
    @ParadoxEngineer Před 4 lety +17

    Me at the beginning of the video: "Pffftt, none of this applies to me!"
    Me at the end of the video: *Crying while writing thank you messages to everyone who has every spoken to me*

  • @kiddracoify
    @kiddracoify Před 4 lety +19

    okay this was just a tid bit awkward: I was really bad at sharing as a kid, the thought of giving up my freedom is enough to get angry and I was playing pokèmon while listening...

  • @Nole1323
    @Nole1323 Před 4 lety +5

    You were on fire with this one. This video has sparked something in me and given me insight into certain parts of myself. Thank you very much for sharing and enlightening. Thank you for your candour and truly profound talk. You actually made me cry.
    - an INTJ

  • @sirnippip
    @sirnippip Před 4 lety +53

    Well done! My quadra is next. Can't wait to get eviscerated.

    • @logand9190
      @logand9190 Před 4 lety +2

      I love that quadra sm☺!

    • @alexasweatt8857
      @alexasweatt8857 Před 4 lety +3

      😂

    • @logand9190
      @logand9190 Před 4 lety +1

      @pepito peligro whys that?

    • @logand9190
      @logand9190 Před 4 lety

      @pepito peligro true

    • @ReliusKholin
      @ReliusKholin Před 4 lety +2

      I mean I always do a little laugh looking the dislikes and comments in CSJ's ENFP video 😆 I can't wait for the next quadra too!

  • @hanes2
    @hanes2 Před 4 lety +12

    I think there’s a reason why I always go for stealth type in video games as a INTJ. A lot of it goes hand in hand. Like a Assassin. Planning ahead, analysing, perfectionist execution, judge the moment, being in control of the moment even tho you’re in the shadow. Etc. (Or being a mastermind behind the executer)

    • @swulfrhapsodia5600
      @swulfrhapsodia5600 Před 4 lety +3

      I am a not-recovering Skyrim addict because Sneak skill and archery.
      That perfect shot, where you can barely see the tip of their head on your screen and against all odds one hit kill... ;)
      Now that I think about it, my Skyrim character exemplifies every aspect of this video. Crypt robbing, hoarding, eff the questline, collect all the pretty unique weapons and artifacts and never even use them.
      Lolol thank you for this comment, I so relate.

    • @IoanaC.
      @IoanaC. Před 3 lety +1

      @@swulfrhapsodia5600 omg I did the exact same things... I just realized I’m a pirate.

    • @TokyoTaisu
      @TokyoTaisu Před 2 lety +1

      Yes or the FPS Call of Duty kind of games where you choose a long distance rifle. Not scoped, because that means lack of control over the field but the furthest rifle possible.

  • @nicodiangelo3308
    @nicodiangelo3308 Před 4 lety +16

    Chase:Your flaws are what makes you beautiful.....(unimportant ramble)..
    Me:Face-palming my entire existence..

    • @benaoao6753
      @benaoao6753 Před 4 lety +3

      Nico Di Angelo ESFP here fuck flaws, gamma Quadra all day

  • @vanishthecat
    @vanishthecat Před 4 lety +10

    This is so informative. I’d actually love a “harsh” lecture about my type/quadrant(INTP/Crusader) that focuses on all the negative points.

  • @MrMomos25
    @MrMomos25 Před 4 lety +8

    We resume to satisfying our own desires because no one else is going to do so as good as we do it. :)). We go for what is ours and we enjoy it. What else is there in life? We give what we have to give with pleasure and we take it the same way. What is wrong in that?
    This goes natural with us, but this is not the main thing in life. Chasing your own desires is not so bad if they are aligned with the needs of society.

  • @sherryzmezzo
    @sherryzmezzo Před 3 lety +5

    This is why I'm thankful for some hardships that hit me early on and force-taught me humility. My life only works because I learned how to sincerely and gracefully apologize.
    Even so, varying shades of this are all over my life. Thank goodness for my INFJ mom; I don't think she's stepped outside of her virtue in my lifetime. I don't know what I would be like without her.
    Another edit: What you said about attention from others interfering with an INTJ's sense of freedom is GOLD. I had never heard it expressed it half as well. Now I know how to explain it to others.

  • @Moana_moo
    @Moana_moo Před 3 lety +4

    As a wayfarer on the autistic spectrum(ISFP) late diagnosed the whole masking and putting on performances for other ppl is on another level

  • @IshizenCnox
    @IshizenCnox Před 4 lety +8

    I really enjoyed how Joseph dug into this topic.. so brutally honest. 😂 It made me laugh deeply because it made perfect sense. Honesty and Gratitude. Totally psyched that I found your channel recently. 🧘‍♂️

  • @sydneychuke1288
    @sydneychuke1288 Před 4 lety +11

    You're basically criticizing the quadra based on their shadow functions, esp NTJs (Fe, Si) which is the very shallowness you're complaining of. I might as well criticize you on the fact that you only care about your comforts and experiences and don't care about giving others a good experience, I mean, since we're judging based on that...
    You accept their treasure gaining abilities, but don't accept their downsides. How shallow can you get?

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +4

      I cannot disagree with you. We are all hypocrites, biased, and predjudiced. I do accept their downsides. When did I say I did not? Their downsides disappear when I offer criticism and they accept it. My downsides disappear when they improve my character with their moral principles. ENTPs fall in love with people for their flaws, not their perfections. I feel like all you have done is put words into my mouth.

  • @mahamharoon2286
    @mahamharoon2286 Před 4 lety +5

    I think part of the reason for being so shallow and not sharing treasure is not just that they want to keep that treasure... it's also that if they acknowledge you, and yes I understand what messed up line of reasoning this is, it means that now they owe you and you know how everything is a transaction. If they owe you, they have to pay you or do whatever you want sometime in the future and that feels like an obligation.
    As for being shallow, I very very much agree and we're also very very scared. The only way to mean something is to trailblaze for someone else to follow but if everyone is trailblazing with you, you mean nothing because we're probably also intensely insecure about being able to put ourselves first. When performance is all you have, that's all you bet on.
    It's really really hard to see yourself as just another person and kind of kills the will power. Even if you really really want to help, you always want to help by always knowing the most, being the most, achieving the most and it's messed up and at the end of the day it sucks but it's just how it is.
    Regards,
    A slightly self aware INTJ

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +1

      Thanks for your comment

  • @maneli
    @maneli Před 4 lety +6

    Very informative, thanks for sharing your wisdom! As an INTJ there were quite a bit of things that you touched on that I used to go through that you mentioned. It makes me appreciate where I came from and how much growth has come and is left. I really resonate with what you said about tapping into your super-ego that if you can integrate that part you will be selfless and share the most. Im starting to get into this headspace as a musician from working through past trauma which in a weird way I am thankful I went through that to grow. For all fellow INTJ's, I think we need to be more vulnerable around the people we care about.

  • @isabelleguevara9372
    @isabelleguevara9372 Před 3 lety +4

    Thank you C.S Joseph, I’m an INFP and love hearing your brutally honest lectures. I just came out of a relationship with an ISFP and everything you’ve stated in terms of depraved tendencies is true. Although, to give him credit he’s more evolved than what you describe. I find it interesting that people feel offended by your honesty and stand for truth due to self deception and inability to be self- aware. I loved every minute of the Delta Quadra lecture, I see those tendencies in myself. Favor unto you!!!!!

  • @Nobody009
    @Nobody009 Před 4 lety +5

    Well, I definitely shed a few tears from this video. Haven't watched all the videos from this playlist yet, but this episode and episode 4 are two of the most relevant and impactful videos to me that I've seen from this channel. You're right Chase, I haven't properly thanked the people in my life who've helped me get to where I am. So I'm going to try to do that more from now on.
    So thank you Chase, your videos have been incredibly helpful to me, the human nurture ones especially. You're also the source of information I trust most regarding Jungian analytical psychology.
    I was trying not to go to bed at 4am again today, but when I saw this was posted earlier today I just couldn't resist that thirst for knowledge.

  • @bishcp
    @bishcp Před 3 lety +6

    Thanks for this one. I think I experienced a breakthrough when you went into detail about how shallow my type can be. For a while I just thought I had inherently better traits than others- there’s still some truth to that- but I’m also realizing now that my fast paced, achievement seeking lifestyle means nothing without being able to share my experiences and inner wealth with the people I care for.
    -A grateful INTJ

  • @kadala_ka
    @kadala_ka Před 4 lety +11

    I'm so happy about this video! Waited this since a while.
    Also I hope you are getting better!

  • @xero6396
    @xero6396 Před 4 lety +7

    I know and have met Wayfarers: ENTJ, INTJ, and ISFP who have tried way too hard to list their achievements to impress, including my ENTJ husband especially on our first date. Oftentimes their achievements really didn't mean anything to me. I am interested in who they are as people. And as a Crusader type I AM endeared to people by their flaws as you said and just want a real relationship.
    And they do tend to flatter themselves so much about their good points which makes it really easy for people to manipulate them by flattering them. Also they can attract gold-diggers and what my husband called "cling-ons", meaning people who want to take advantage of them to get the best seats or invited to the best parties or meet all the famous people. Because they are constantly all about their achievements and shallowness and promoting themselves they can have shallow relationships with the wrong people. Luckily my husband likes me for being "real, down-to-earth, genuine, and really nice".
    They can need attention all the time so they can be very demanding.
    They do find it hard to be grateful because they do think that when they've succeeded it is entirely down to them even if you have done everything for them. I love them. But they do this. They can be very selfish and opportunistic and use people to get what they want and treat people like conveniences and they really don't want to share. And it can lead to problems unless you are very understanding and patient with them even if you have that supporter subconscious like I do as an INTP.
    I really like them. But yes, this stuff is very true.

    • @burdicio2175
      @burdicio2175 Před 4 lety

      so was he not suppose to tell you those things or was it the way he said it. isnt that what you do on dates as an INTJ I have bad social anxiety so easiest thing would be to talk about something im proud of. I would just be stating facts like i dont see the issue...people perceive things differently. Our achievements are us you can decipher so much info from what someone has achieved. Why would we waste years and money just to impress seems like a waste of time and pointless. seems like some immature people

  • @Whimsydaisy
    @Whimsydaisy Před 4 lety +5

    Thank you for starting off the video saying that this quadra was the most misunderstood type. Because what you said thereafter proved that point.

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +1

      Did you bother finishing it?

  • @dairdb
    @dairdb Před 4 lety +39

    This one hurt...

  • @nigelharvey640
    @nigelharvey640 Před 3 lety +5

    Ti is seeking Truth and hence Fairness.
    Fi is seeking meaning and hence Happiness
    The selfishness of Fi is Emotional tunnel vision that allows them to keep doing what is harmful (Fe) to others for an expedient belief in Fi perfection.
    The selfishness of Ti is Logical tunnel vision that allows them to keep believing (Te) in an expediently built Ti perfection
    And in sense they get in the way of the other.
    So Crusader (Big Picture Truth)
    Templar (Self Expressed Truth)
    Wayfarer (Self Expressed Meaning)
    Philosophers (Big Picture Meaning)
    If that’s right, I get why you say “for some reason” a lot in this video where I’m feeling like it’s obvious.
    I would also say that, the gap that gets everyone pissed off seems to be that you dish out the truth first and are somewhat removed from the Fi. However, You kinda have to be removed from Fi to stay objective. Fi users here to sharpen their own Te sword will understand.
    However if you don’t get the point of Fi, then you don’t contribute or acknowledge the meaning and intention behind it. You did that way better in the Templar video, that being you really helped me as an ENFP Philosopher (btw while I’m totally open to being wrong about that ENFP label being the case, I have learned to deliver anything as confidently as possible so people like you don’t just write off the entirety of what im saying as illogical) see what matters (Fi) to Templar types. It took me a long time to get it because i had to learn your entire framework to see what patterns you’re seeing but for me that little bit of Fi perspective is worth it and totally heals my perception of you. I forgive your bs let’s say. My mission is to forgive the whole world. You value Truth itself and upholding it and now that I understand that Value, I can accept that need in you. It’s obvious then that you’d miss the mark emotionally with the others because you don’t live like them and exploring Fi seems fundamentally contradictory to your Ti’s purpose.
    The Fi users see the Truth as a means to a meaningful end (maximizing happiness, if you know how then you can teach others the way to more joy in this dark life, that’s my perspective)
    Ti types seem to think that the things the world values, enjoys, give two shits trying to get, strives for, etc. , just come out of thin air or just write it off as just biology or just “relationships are the meaning to life” when it’s deeper than that. I get it though because you can’t figure out what’s fair if you focus on the details of what brings the most happiness. More often than not, you have to ignore your happiness to get to whats fair. While the Fi types see logic and the truth as something that comes out if thin air, thinking that with enough meaning and happiness the logical parts will just work itself out. Again that makes sense though because, you can’t find what is Fi meaningful if you let what’s Fair get in the way.
    This isn’t to say Fair action isn’t meaningful or Meaningful action isn’t fair. In fact, I’d argue they are pretty similar and aligned in most ways but the Journey to get to the full understanding of Truth or Meaning requires turning a blind eye to the other sometimes.
    The Extroverted sides of the Fi (Te) and Ti (Fe) seem to be more aware of the problem in the above paragraphs but forget the “point” inside themselves for the sake of the trying to line themselves up with the Te logic source or the Fe Meaning source.
    I think this may help you relate more to the Fi audience better if you could extrapolate what that means logically for you. I don’t think I can logic out your entire psyche but I hope this helps you logic out the Fi psyche better, it really helped me personally.
    Ps Im guessing Jordan Peterson is an ENFP that figured this out and striving to teach other Fi’s the point to life not ENTP that still illogically is okay with globalism but super open to being wrong there. I think he looks contradictory to everyone because he doesn’t follow through with the fairness T dominants want but also doesn’t allow F dominants to be ignorant in their Pursuit of meaning. He isn’t harsh like you but he’s studied a lot of perspectives to get to the understand he has and now faces off logically against essentially everyone to hopefully point out what is Fi meaningful in life. If I’m an ENFP, my experience being constantly frustrated with the mechanics of life (Ti) getting in the way of what matters but still being aware of and learning what is necessary (Te) to actually make it happen, absolutely sounds like Jordan P.

  • @Mike-om5hp
    @Mike-om5hp Před 4 lety +15

    As an INTJ viewer this is as always a very enlightening and much needed lecture, makes sense that my mother always would stress the importance of gratitude and thank you, thank you for all the information and wisdom that you provide to all the types.

  • @Riiiiiingo
    @Riiiiiingo Před 4 lety +26

    I think that 'treat others how you want to be treated' is made for us. Especially NTJs, we lack Fe so the only way of understanding others is thru imagining how would I feel if I were in his shoes. Realizing that when you are the only one on top that means you are standing on someone and taking a second to imagine how it would feel to be there makes you step down.

  • @roushanam
    @roushanam Před 4 lety +34

    It's really amusing to listen to you cackle and castigate like a vicious hysterical fishwife about how other people should stop projecting.

  • @lubabamaaz3137
    @lubabamaaz3137 Před 4 lety +6

    You have NO idea how much this helped me understand my struggling Gamma friends, and them too, to understand their struggles better! Would it be odd if I said I feel so proud of you as fellow human being? :P :D Glad to see you recovered!

  • @melissamouton9464
    @melissamouton9464 Před 3 lety +12

    I'm having such a hard time typing myself because I definitely relate to both Templars and Wayfarers. Specifically when you talk about performing so people won't abandon you. Although I greatly wonder if that comes from childhood trauma because performing was everything so I wonder if it's my shadow I lived in? Because I'm not huge on freedom of choice in my own life. I like having a boss. I like being told what to do. It helps me focus and get things done. But, when it comes to Templars I relate because I have a significant focus tearing people down to help build them up. It's so odd, to me, that typing myself would be so difficult. Maybe it doesn't matter, but I would like to know specifically for the purpose of building myself up and getting some direction in my life

  • @user-lm4bv1gh7u
    @user-lm4bv1gh7u Před 3 lety +6

    I am currently with a templar and she completely exposed me for the flawed selfish human being I was and I am glad to be in a relationship with her

  • @angelcat4785
    @angelcat4785 Před 4 lety +26

    Ok a lot of truth .... but we do have a lot to offer. We work very hard and strategically create goals to gain the treasure. We are very hard on ourselves. From my point of view if you are not working as hard as me but you want to share or take; highly annoying, but if you work hard or have some sort of contribution. I am all for it , I like to share , the difference maybe I don’t like being taken advantage of. But great point,you can’t enjoy everything on your own , it’s not good.

  • @RachaelStG
    @RachaelStG Před 3 lety +3

    Are relationships not transactional? Nobody wants someone that has nothing to contribute. Not healthy people. There is no unconditional love. That's codependency. "We pay our debts sometime.." and all that. Being paranoid does not mean we're wrong. Thanks for the work you do. It's super important.

  • @jaredvaughan1665
    @jaredvaughan1665 Před 4 lety +12

    The ESFPs I personally have encountered (who have not developed Fi parent) have struggled with promiscuity. Bill Clinton is an example.

  • @melissamouton9464
    @melissamouton9464 Před 3 lety +10

    I'm wondering, why it's so crazy to think that people won't, or will, abandon you based on your performance, or lack thereof? Aren't we all basing who we have on our lives on their performance in one way or another? When you discuss men building their kingdoms with other men with their kingdoms isn't that determining having someone in your life based on their performance? Whether it be monetary, intellect, humor, support etc it's all a "transaction" of sorts no? There is some sort of criteria, I'm sure.

  • @justlookalittledeeper9953

    That INTJ caller proved some of the things C.S. was saying earlier.

    • @waltertaboada9319
      @waltertaboada9319 Před 4 lety +4

      To me she seemed more of an INFJ.. The artistic side, the way she wanted to be the one talking and showing little respect for Chase theory, makes me believe she has Te Trickster, I found that INTJ are the ones who follow and devour Chase's theory the most, me included, (this is just a theory)

  • @CuddleClaw.
    @CuddleClaw. Před 4 lety +3

    This was highly enjoyable to listen to. I do think you bashed these types more than in the Templar lecture... but perhaps I think that way because to me being labeled “shallow” would be a huge burn. I was married to an INTJ for for 10 years and he was constantly trying to control what I wear and once told me he would refuse to go out with me if I didn’t change my shoes because they were “dirty.” An ESFP that I got to know briefly I felt was way to energetic and inauthentic. Keep up your great work Chase! I can never be mad for someone telling me the truth. I appreciate you. -ISTP

  • @hankyotutorials
    @hankyotutorials Před 3 lety +3

    thank you CSJ, i'm an ISFP, i learn countless life lessons from you❤️

  • @mattmatthewmatchuu
    @mattmatthewmatchuu Před 4 lety +36

    Lol i laughed the whole time chase. Ntj are so paranoid and funny lol. Why do i love them so much lol

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +4

      @@aplethoraofme2056 No she didn't ^^

    • @megnemo6403
      @megnemo6403 Před 4 lety +1

      Probably because you make us paranoid by chasing us so the chase makes you more interested and us more paranoid therefore self perpetuating cycle continues.

    • @AlastorTheNPDemon
      @AlastorTheNPDemon Před 4 lety +2

      What does it mean when I'm paranoid, self aware of it, and compensate by being an open book about certain things?

  • @philliptenneb6674
    @philliptenneb6674 Před 3 lety +6

    This hurt in the best way possible. Thank you. -intj

  • @zhoumei6
    @zhoumei6 Před 3 lety +6

    I can tell that it is mentioned that they tend to be loner because they treat others as disposable objects. At the same time, it gives a sense that they might consider themselves as loner because they thought they would be disposed by people in the same way, but in reality, there are lots of people are not wayfarers, it gives me a sense of positivity that "even wayfarers think they are alone and nobody love them, there are lots of people are loving them and ready to love them". Of course, if they recognize and appreciate the love people give to them. (Give and Take)
    At the same time, I find the shallowness in the context is quite hard for me to understand. Shallowness means obsessive desire about material, status, looks... ? It is not hard for people with Ni to realize the Zen's state, not unless they were on grip or in certain kind of stressful state. If someone been defined as their worst condition, will it be a waste of the value of the best?

  • @shadowthewarlord705
    @shadowthewarlord705 Před 3 lety +4

    I am a ENTJ, I won't lie, there is a part of me that says, "Ouch, this is pretty harsh, let's do something else." But that fact is that there's also a small part of me that says, "Hey, stupid, he's right about a fair amount of this stuff. Stop complaining. Man up. And take the hit. It might hurt but in the end it'll help you grow past these weaknesses."
    So when I looked at the comments and saw not one, but TWO comments from C.S. talking about how people were saying that he was too harsh I felt that I should make known that despite the harshness, I do not believe there is any such thing as too harsh. Regardless of what is said there is two ways to deal with it depending on whether you think it's right or wrong. If you listen and think it's right, even if it's harsh, then suck it up and deal with it. Take the insights and use them to better yourself. Fact is the truth hurts. Sometimes pain is required to better yourself. I'd know as someone who's been repeatedly told and paid the price for being to cold and refusing to express myself. I am attempting to fix this (Rather poorly honestly) by learning to understand my own emotions and to be willing to express them. It hurts, admitting your faults, let alone trying to fix them.
    Now if you think the info is wrong or doesn't apply to you, then why do you care? If it doesn't apply to you then it shouldn't affect you. Caring about it regardless of it not effecting you is foolishness, it accomplishes nothing but making everyone think that they are right and it gives the person who said whatever it was power over you. Why should you let someone who's wrong control your entire mood/day/etc.
    I get where people are coming from. I'm among those criticized in this video and it was indeed quite harsh. But before any criticism is given out you need to think about WHY you are giving the criticism. Fact is we don't like being told we have flaws, and in response most of us rather than fixing the flaw will go in denial and attack anyone who claims such a flaw exists. So I implore you in the future to think about this. Are you criticizing because there was actually false/bad content? Or are you simply going into denial and mad that anyone would bring up such major flaws?
    I know personally not all this video applied to me. I feel that some of what is said is either inaccurate when applied to me or it just isn't even directed at me. However, a fair amount still did, or at the very least benefited me by opening up new avenues of perspective to view myself from so I can actually see my flaws and go about fixing the issue instead of sitting in denial pretending the issue doesn't exist and demanding that everyone pretends with me. It's dumb, and unhealthy, and to be frank quite pathetic.
    Anyway, that's my 2 cents, hope someone perhaps will take some wisdom out of this.

    • @dennishuang2753
      @dennishuang2753 Před 2 měsíci +1

      You really do have a way of explaining, you just verbalized everything I thought of👌🏻

  • @IoanaC.
    @IoanaC. Před 3 lety +6

    Wow this makes so much sense... all my life I was annoyingly aware of the fact that I was very shallow.. to the point where I was almost proud to be able to admit it if that makes sense, lol. As an INTJ it totally makes sense now.

  • @shacar106
    @shacar106 Před 4 lety +4

    Thank you so much for this information. Among other things that you said, as an Isfp I needed to hear that my flaws are what will keep my loved ones from abandoning me. I can attest to that statement and needed to be reminded of it. It is so weird because I was really concerned about performing well enough to keep my relationships with those I love successful. I've learned a lot about humility and gratitude via life experiences but it is always good to be reminded to keep practicing those things.
    Also I can say that after my divorce from an Enfj, I got into a relationship with an Istp. I shared my flaws & past mistakes with him. I have actually always been the transparent type because of my faith. But this dude ended up being emotionally abusive. I never knew someone could be so mean. My Enfj Ex was never downright mean. But this guy gaslighted me and was extremly passive and overtly aggresive. He was attracted to my looks and my poise at first but soon started complaining about my wanting to fix myself up. He asked me to stop wearing makeup and told me that I didnt need to do all that exercising. He didn't want me going anywhere alone. He used the knowledge of my flaws / insecuities and past mistakes as weapons against me. His jealousy and paranoia caused me a huge amount of anxiety.
    Thankfully I got out of that relationship. As an enneagram 9 ( Peacemaker ) it was hard to not keep trying to make it work after having already been through a divorce, but I am so thankful that the advice of others helped me to get away from that relationship. I will always show gratitude toward a person that cares enough to help me ( people like you).
    I am now married to an Estj and he has been the most loving man I have ever met. Although he is not a Crusader, he makes me feel safe to be me. He won't abandon me because he actually truly loves me for me. If that isn't gold, I don't know what is.
    This lecture was useful, helpful and enlightening for sure. Thanks again Chase.

  • @qtdeshina
    @qtdeshina Před 4 lety +3

    Great lecture and as an ENTJ I always knew that the people were the treasure. I have a lot of respect for you Chase! It's true the things you see in gamma quadra. My sister is an INTJ. Great new year's resolution I have for myself is to listen and wait AT LEAST 3 seconds before deciding how to respond. I need to practice empathetic responses though I'm 25 and in a counseling program in grad school!

  • @isabellelariviere2048
    @isabellelariviere2048 Před 4 lety +4

    An INTJ just did the most incredible thing for me. (INTP btw). I met him back in September in university and we fell in love. I gained his trust and he had my undying loyalty. He told me about his ambitions and made it clear he wanted me by his side.
    However, we both need to work on ourselves and make the most of university (he’s wicked smart and pursuing finance and I’m headed for a brilliant career in academia). Due to circumstances, we wouldn’t see each other for about 3 more years.
    He saw that I wouldn’t handle that very well (and I agree), so he pushed me away. He ended the relationship and hit me where it hurt the most (inferior Fe). I believed him (he made sure to bypass Ti and Ne), but his downfall was that he wasn’t truly able to hurt me when we saw each other face to face.
    It took about 5 months, but he got me to let go and “move on.” It demonstrably got harder for him to do because I was increasing my beauty by finally learning about makeup and skincare, and the fact that I was constantly passing his loyalty checks by showing him respect and understanding. (He even half admitted to that). By then, I had so much evidence (Si) that when an ENTP I met suggested that he might be hiding his true motive (Thanks Ne hero. I couldn’t see it because my Ne is pessimistic and my Ti was stunned by him feeding my Fe insecurities), I was able to figure out the plot.
    I don’t care if anyone reading this thinks I am delusional. It does sound crazy and self serving, but it is also possible. If it were true, you would have no way of knowing.
    That INTJ loves me so much that he is willing to risk losing me just so that he wouldn’t be the cause of my suffering. So I could be liberated from his spell. Could there be a greater sacrifice for an INTJ? There is no way anyone could be deserving of this.

    • @Goldforever-vp8zq
      @Goldforever-vp8zq Před 4 lety +1

      If this is true I have a new respect for INTJs. Most men think of love as having to have you especially if they are a shallower type to show the world they got the woman of their dreams. I have a hard time believing this is true though because people by nature are a little selfish even more so when it comes to their wants. I know a intj that gave a ex a gift they had promised to their former exes child (that wasn’t the INTJs kid) even after they broke up. I’ll just always remember that. INTJs act like what people expect Infjs to be and vice versa

    • @redefinedliving5974
      @redefinedliving5974 Před 3 lety

      nyayyyy LOL

  • @jeterpilled_memester
    @jeterpilled_memester Před 4 lety +30

    had the time of my life laughing at the internet mbti "deep" people( xNTJ's) getting the shallow adjective slapped on them

  • @linnaeusa
    @linnaeusa Před 3 lety +2

    I am an INTJ woman and I have never been a woman who likes to praise myself. I am much more modest compared to what is said and told about other INTJs. Because my Ti critic is often unsure of itself. But maybe, I owe my ENFJ mother why I am like this. She raised me very humble.

  • @dennisjonker4804
    @dennisjonker4804 Před 4 lety +11

    I feel shredded and eviscerated by ENTP castigation.... How refreshing. Time to weed out the shallowness issue. Got some weed roots to yank out and destroy. :) Somehow the idea of conflict seems more scary than the conflict itself.

  • @TushaRex
    @TushaRex Před 4 lety +5

    Usually I agree with everything you say about INTJs but I feel like the explanation and examples you have provided are all in regards to unhealthy wayfarers. Either that or I have been typing myself incorrectly for years (which is possible, I'm no expert).
    Shallow - I have never really seen myself as shallow but I can see how reservations in showing vulnerability to protect your image (or your sense of self) can come off in this way. This to me, it is more about protecting myself from others viewing my image as vulnerable when I want to appear strong/stable. In terms of physical shallowness, I have never cared much about this in myself or in others. For example, on Tinder if I see someone who has topless photos, that's a no-go for me; I don't see how that says anything about yourself other than "looks matter" (that's not to say there doesn't have to be some kind of physical attraction there, just that it isn't the thing that hooks me). However, I have definitely displayed intellectual shallowness, and still do to some extent. That's not to say I only want to interact with intelligent people, but rather I want to connect with people on a similar wavelength, with a similar thought process.
    You talk about INTJs checking phones of partners in a lot of videos - I have never done this, even as a teen. It is a complete invasion of privacy and I have never understood why anyone feels the need, or why anyone would allow this. If you don't trust with them, then why are you with them? In the vice and virtues video I relate to paranoia being a primary flaw, but it comes from someone giving me a reason. The only example I have of being accused of being jealous is after an ex went out on a work night then told me everyone went back to one of his female work friends houses. We then bumped into another work friend of his and it came out that he had gone to hers alone. I wouldn't have cared had he told me, but the secretiveness gave me a reason to question his motives. He then continued texting her but told me they didn't speak, yet I would see messages pop up from her - again had there been honesty I would have had no reason to question this. Especially taking into account that the majority of my friends are male. When I spoke up about it he told me he kept the texts a secret as he didn't want to make me paranoid, whilst not realising this is what caused the paranoia. Funnily enough he was an ENTP. So maybe the issue here is lack of understanding between the two types, rather than it specifically being an INTJ flaw.
    Saying we want to own the treasure and not be owned; I certainly don't want to be owned, I want my freedom and independence but I don't care about owning the other person. As long as they are there for me when I need them and they know I'm there for them, that's all that matters. I like to know what my partner is doing, but more in terms of I want them to feel like they want to share their life with me the same way I want to with them. But I would never try to force that, and if they gave me a reason to feel that I "had" to then I'd know to leave.
    We try to steal others partners or are known as cheaters. Bit harsh. Feel like this is from experience in being burned. I would feel crappy if someone tried to steal my partner so I would never consciously do that to someone. Also, why would you want someone who is willing to do that to someone they supposedly love? How would you ever trust them? In terms of us being cheaters, I have kissed someone before whilst being on a break with someone. I am fully aware this is an awful thing to do to someone and I'm not justifying myself, but I instantly broke down. It meant I broke not only the trust with my partner but the trust in myself and it also made me question my principles. It's definitely not something I would repeat. I find it hard to believe that types so focussed on trust and holding themselves to a high standard would be the most likely to break it.
    Gold diggers - no thank you. I would find it really hard being with someone earning loads more than me as I would fear that they would treat me as though they they own me or I depend on them (that's the paranoia kicking in, but also fear of falling into past gender roles - could just be an INTJ female thing?) I will always remember speaking with an old chap at the bus stop and him saying find yourself a rich husband. My response to something like that has always been I would rather be the one bringing in the money as I only want to be dependant upon myself.
    "Take what you can, give nothing back" - this is horrifying to me. How can you have a friendship or romantic relationship based on this? I would rather "Give what I can and expect the same back". This links to what you said about these types having high expectations. I do have high expectations from relationships but that's because it is out of the norm for me to put so much effort in, so if I'm taking time to do that I would expect the same in return. Also, I will share my "treasure" but only when it has been earned it and I know I'm not being taken for granted. Happened way too much in the past, you give people your all and they fuck you over. Seeing the lack of sharing as being shallow is just a misunderstanding of reservedness.
    You talk about the lack of humility and respect given by these types. Sure, you won't get any respect from me if you haven't earned it or provided me with some level of respect - I would only ever disrespect someone intentionally if they did that to myself or someone I care about. In terms of humility, I would say when I was younger I definitely had an issue with this, I was one of the outsiders so this mentality was more about protecting myself from my flaws and yeah, making others care about what you appear to be. But as you get older you realise this doesn't really forge good relationships, people only ever see you being hard on them and not you being hard on yourself. Now-a-days I know how to laugh at myself and I'm pretty up front about my flaws.
    "Fake it till you make it" - my ENTP ex used to say this ALL the time. How do you fake it? I cannot do this, my whole body rejects this kind of behaviour. Be who you are and own it. Damn right your flaws are what make you beautiful.
    We forget people who have helped us and feel all alone - definitely see how this plays out when you finish high school and friendships drift, if you don't make an effort to be there for people then you will feel alone. But when I truly accept someone into my circle, they know how grateful I am to have them in my life and they know I'd do anything for them. Granted this behaviour should be extended to everyone but then that plays into trying not to be too trusting and keeping up that guard. You saying NTJ people forget to thank you for 'elevating their lives' - maybe that's more to do will them being able to tell you are expecting it and sounding like you have been the one key thing to get them to where they are when they will also have put a to of effort in themselves. It sounds more like an ENTP ego issue - "I was the guy that gave them a shot" (not trying to be hurtful but) it's like you are taking credit for all their success - I wouldn't thank you if that was your behaviour. It's like you're doing the favour to look good, rather than to help.
    Personal experience - I do find it quite odd that you say INTJs have an issue with sharing because this is pretty much why my last relationship ended. I didn't so much have an issue with sharing rather than not knowing how to start the conversation without my ENTP ex getting defensive/sarcastic. Not saying I'm not perfect but it was very hard having a conversation when the other person dismisses what you are saying. Obviously this won't be the case with everyone but again it's that paranoia coming into place; it's not that we don't want to share - more that we don't know how. To anyone struggling with this I highly recommend speaking with a counsellor, I know it sounds like a nightmare - but it is worth it!
    Maybe the people I have in my circle have helped me develop which is why I don't relate so much or maybe I'm simply not an INTJ at all. I don't really expect any of you to read this, especially 8 months later, but thank you if you have and it would be nice to know whether you INTJs feel the same?

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +1

      I am only pointing out potential behavior, although some of this behavior is likely among all wayfarer types.

  • @jacobwiren8142
    @jacobwiren8142 Před 3 lety +8

    Joseph: claims Wayfarers tend to steal.
    Me, an INTJ: What ideas can I steal from him today...

    • @redefinedliving5974
      @redefinedliving5974 Před 3 lety +1

      yes omg dont give credit at all

    • @jacobwiren8142
      @jacobwiren8142 Před 3 lety

      @@redefinedliving5974 Every day I see people throw away valuable stuff. Sometimes they throw away valuable objects, sometimes ideas, sometimes other people. Everyone would steal if they saw what Wayfarers see every day...

    • @redefinedliving5974
      @redefinedliving5974 Před 3 lety +3

      @@jacobwiren8142 i understand as an infj. i am not talking abt something thrown away, im talking abt something freely shared. lol. giving credit where it's due is always appreciated :P it's just that when someone is no longer in their life, gammas tend to take it as solely their own what they obv have learned from others. it's icky lol makes them very untrustworthy

  • @jaredvaughan1665
    @jaredvaughan1665 Před 4 lety +9

    This quadra cares about appearances the most. They like to wear scents and perfume too. ENTJ Napoleon Bonaparte was crazy about cologne.

  • @lolhuang
    @lolhuang Před 4 lety +16

    You'd find this quadra a bit more palpable, even cute, if you just remember them to be the tsundares that they are.

    • @NeinFeline
      @NeinFeline Před 4 lety +1

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @donghuyentrang
    @donghuyentrang Před 2 lety +1

    Rewatching all old episodes to sharpen what I‘ve learnt so far on your channel. It‘s like rereading a favorite old book and nevertheless learn a bunch of new things. Thanks, Chase. You‘re the best.

  • @jasongrc
    @jasongrc Před 4 lety +7

    Well I (ISFP) hate co-dependency I'm not looking for a co-dependent partner. I'm looking for someone to loot gold with me. And please do shed that spotlight on me I will outperform anyone and everyone in any condition on the subject of my pride I've invested the effort to make sure of that heheeeeeeeee

  • @imjustrambling
    @imjustrambling Před 4 lety +16

    "If I didn't care, I wouldn't say anything at all."
    As a fellow crusader, I definitely relate to dishing it out hard to wayfarers and all other types, including myself. #icyswordoftruth It's not that we don't care, in fact, it's that we care so much that we do what it takes to help. If you chose to perceive that help as a bulldozer trampling all over your feelings, it's probably because your being too shallow to even consider thinking about why someone would say this to you.

  • @user-xz5bp8sb9u
    @user-xz5bp8sb9u Před 4 lety +1

    Check list
    -How to trust someone?
    -How not to forget the help from other people?(I realized that people sometime help me but when I ask for help and they reject(it hurt a lots), I suddenly forget. EVENTHOUGHT I KNOW THAT BEFORE) suddenly I learn to reject like a bad ass. Why help you? (Still help when I am feel good)
    -How to shared without feel like losing?(example I learn math my play play his phone. The test come they ask me for help. I help but alsl thinking that I were taking advantage about the time of having fun because when they are having fun, it's me who stress at that time really.)

  • @bafbaas1210
    @bafbaas1210 Před 4 lety +9

    Omg this 1:00:10 is giving me flashbacks to when i graduated high school but felt terrible about it cause my parents and teachers had to help me cause I'm a horrible studier (thank god i'm doing something more practical). But I still carry some resentment towards them for not letting me try on my own cause they didn't have faith that i could. Maybe I should feel more grateful, but receiving help makes me feel so weak sometimes.

  • @freezeblaster15
    @freezeblaster15 Před 4 lety +4

    Thank you for your videos Chase. I don't stay in touch as much as I used to, but I'm glad to see the knowledge is still coming. I saw on your FB page that some members in my fellow quadra are not happy with the overall description of the quadra. I have to agree that your experiences do filter how the knowledge gets translated in the video, with focuses being on shallowness and selfishness ties to treasure/gloryseeking. However, with the personal lens disregarded and purely the ideas looked at, your observations are all accurate information. I could see my own undisclosed worldview in your words. Once again, great job and keep doing what you do.
    For others who may read my comment, let's remember that Chase is human too and his experiences will naturally filter into his portrayal of information. We are all human, we all have biases; we all do this. When you see it on his channel, don't take that as a summative evaluation of this quadra being inferior to other quadras. Take it as Chase being real with us. That doesn't mean our understanding of this topic stops there. Like he said in the video, humans need each other to accomplish things. Use this video to start constructive dialogue with Chase and within the channel about the topic if you feel like there is still more to say about who the gamma quadra are (rather than take this video as the end result and all you need to be conclusive).

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety +2

      I very much miss you bro. Thank you for your powerful opinion. I am glad and thankful that you have not left me feeling unwanted.

  • @user-qr9td4in7q
    @user-qr9td4in7q Před 4 lety +5

    look ..
    I don't mind the harsh delivery way because that's normal of you with all the types and I'm going on with it.
    And you made this Quadra series to explain each quadra with both of it's aspects (whether positive and negative).
    but haven't you noticed that you have made a whole 45mins lecture spotting the flaws in this Quadra with a hatred tone and just ended the lecture without spotting a single positive aspect of the quadra?
    even though you said that the Crusaders does love the flaws in the Wayfarer Quadra .. i see a hypocrisy in here.
    I advice you to make another part for this lecture to solve this issue and make it as fair as it was for other Quadras.

    • @CSJoseph
      @CSJoseph  Před 4 lety

      the Positivity is implied. Who doesn't want Treasure? The world runs on Treasure. It is cool that Crusaders end up with the treasure hunters. Wait for episode 10.

  • @SnootyFarkleboob
    @SnootyFarkleboob Před 4 lety +8

    Huh! This explains an INTJ friend of mine so beautifully! She often talks about how she has no other female friends because women are always jealous of her and afraid she'll steal their man. After watching her blatantly hit on my (ISFJ) partner a few times, endlessly flatter her own great looks, talking about how men can't resist her... well, I started to see why other women might find her unhealthy to have as a friend. I mostly just don't get it but I appreciate having a clearer insight into her perspective of herself and the world.
    Also, get yourself an SFJ guy who is so rigidly loyal he doesn't pay any attention to flirting unless an actual breast hits him in the face. Even then he's mostly concerned that he spilled his tea. No cheating concerns over here literally ever so I guess I'm the perfect INTJ woman's female friend? 🤷‍♀️ 😂

  • @Hadeel.414
    @Hadeel.414 Před 4 lety +6

    It hits me that ep cause I have an ESFP close friend shares her gratitude to me :')
    you nailed down the comparison of ESFP and INTJ how they treat their lover that's so TRUUUUU cause I do have an INTJ sis..
    Thank you for the effort you put in the ep it was great ! especially you are sick for the whole month ❤
    and Can you tell us how is your health rn ?

  • @ADJL1331
    @ADJL1331 Před 4 lety +13

    That ISFJ subconscious nice guy all of a sudden coming out while talking to the INTJ woman after a proper roast session for the entire quadra. Even his interaction style shifted so nicely into a background mode, just found it funny
    1:06:06 though... Bruh we just witnessed an ENTP die inside (no offence to NTJ women, but man I'm so glad at times that I'm not an intellectual NTP)

    • @m.m.9006
      @m.m.9006 Před 4 lety

      Why did he die inside?

  • @malcolmmacinnis247
    @malcolmmacinnis247 Před 4 lety +3

    Your final guest is the best to understand this

  • @hersheyxy6443
    @hersheyxy6443 Před 4 lety +3

    You are the best, im an ENTJ and you changed my life

  • @kristyk8192
    @kristyk8192 Před 3 lety +4

    😂"old & crunchy" lol this got me

  • @brittanypage1706
    @brittanypage1706 Před 4 lety +4

    Oh I'm shallow LOL (INTJ). I'm shallow because I don't want my kids getting bullied the way I did for being "ugly". For me my concern is kids. When I date people I look for qualities I want my kids to pick up on or a partner (male or female) who's as stable as I am so much kids didn't have to grow up super poor the way I did. I like to use my experiences to learn from since my learning disability gave me great long term memory.
    I used to be a gold digger until my ENFP ex said that I'm the type of girl who's lusted but not loved. Biggest reality check of my life. I developed a complex around accepting gifts. I still 5 years later can't accept gifts unless it's a holiday. I can't let people buy dinner for me. I had this ESFJ male get really offered because I refused to let him pay for dinner. I'm shallow. I value beauty and status above everything else but as a female who has both I want it for my kids.
    I used to take ALL THE TIME! And after I turned down law school reality it was the ENTP shadow wanting the power I went into counselling. I'm a philosophical counsellor I do psychotherapy on the side to give back.
    Philosophy REALLY humbled me. I grew up with a mother who gaslighted me 24/7. It's scary how good she is at it. Philosophy really was my escape and I struggled in philosophy because I don't belong in it LOL. But philosophy really taught me so much. Philosophy definitely changed my life. And you know sucking at philosophy (at first) really bothered me but now it's really a badge of honor.
    Still shallow, thankfully not as much anymore. As someone who likes "treasure", just don't be monogamous in the first place lol.
    Philosophy really made me address my own feelings and emotions and learn for to defend them. Being hyper aware is super annoying but it's for the better in the end.
    My INTP ex was SUPER grateful for all the acknowledgement and thanks I used to give him. I honestly just to practice in the mirror saying "I'm wrong you're right" to learn to throw away pride.
    After so much failure in relationships, philosophy started yelling at me, well Martin Buber was yelling at me that I didn't trust myself and that my experience is a me problem. So I went years without dating anyone improving myself and recently started getting back out in the dating world and it's a lot easier now. I'm a lot more aware of how much of a bitch and taker I really was. Now I over give but hey I think giving too much is better than taking too much.
    And now I'm some weird magnet to INFPs lmfao and have no idea how to handle INFP males. But hey! Gotta change it up from dating all the ENTPs and INTPs.

  • @Mikumo-lovethunderglow
    @Mikumo-lovethunderglow Před rokem +1

    Wow this explains so much! I was in a relationship with a Wayfarer for almost a decade and I can see how all those weaknesses played a part in its demise. I have even more reason now to suspect that he's trying to get out of seeing his daughter because he keeps turning down seeing her every weekend sometimes with a reason, sometimes he makes it impossible to ask lest he gets angry, or just says "busy" and I cannot question him lest... well. He of course suspects me, assuming I'm shallow (like him?) and jumping to conclusions. At least I gave him the benefit of the doubt. When we broke up he said that I "wasted his life" which was unbelievable because I had made so many personal sacrifices to make help him become the success he is today (in areas of fitness, society, career etc) ...and I left all those resources and prestige because I couldn't stand his priorities, personality, habits (like, no hygiene,manners etc) and condescending, controlling treatment at home. He got a girlfriend right away as I left (as he had 50 previous to me as he liked to brag, and girls he chatted with online during our relationship too). He has money and whatever social circles where he's esteemed but has"no time for his daughter" as he didn't have for me. Wondering when it might be safe to bring it up that that's what he said when we broke up - "I got my priorities wrong". Though we're pedagogues for each other, I feel unsafe to challenge him. I hope he enjoys his treasure.

  • @fib4983
    @fib4983 Před 4 lety +18

    27:33 I never think about the fact people will age lmaooo. Im ESFP

    • @supermysterious66
      @supermysterious66 Před 4 lety

      There's a ESFP kid I've know for a few years. One time they asked me about my age, and even though a few years have past since then, they still act and talk as if I'm the age I told them... it's just too cute too have the heart to tell them... (I'm an ENTP...)

    • @fib4983
      @fib4983 Před 4 lety +1

      @@supermysterious66 LMAO thats so cute but so evilll lmaoo >:)))