As we start our #dayindayout journeys. Take time to #reflect and appreciate the small things. Your struggles are not exclusive and it's "NOT ABOUT YOU"! #CHOOSE your path.
At the end of every school year, as a teacher, I play this video for my students. I always wish to leave them with an understanding of empathy, an understanding of the struggles of others. Today's the day I show it again. What a year.
Thank you. I watched this some years back, and liked it. I just remembered it, today, and watched the whole thing. Well, I listened, the still image useless. But watching yours, the points are made clear. I do not have that default setting, and never have. For this I am grateful beyond measure! The idea the universe revolves around me is so amazingly wrong that it is “non-logical reasoning” defined.
If I may suggest, another good speech to have your students hear is "Class of 99; Wear Sunscreen". They're some things that only life can teach and these two videos are good attempts to do that.
This video literally changed my life. The first time I watched it, my way of looking at life did a complete 180 and I have never gone back. When I feel myself slipping I come back to this video to remind myself.
Yes! I do the same thing. Every so often I find myself in a slump and find my way back to this speach. Every time I feel much better and the message sinks further into my consciousness. Beautiful message. This is water. This is water ❤️🥲
I feel like this video helps me understand how we should see the world around us and how to be compassionate towards others. We should think less about ourselves and learn how to just be a better person. I hope whoever is reading this has a great day. May God bless you and guide your lives. He loves and cares about you. Trust in God :)
SAME! I finally chocked up the money and bought a collection of his essays on my Kindle today and immediately remembered this and had to come watch it... again! Probably one of the best videos I ever stumbled upon here on CZcams.
Same. After all these years since I first read the full thing, it's one of the most bluntly meaningful speeches I've encountered. RIP David Foster Wallace.
My English teacher had a whole assignment centered around this speech in 11th grade. I’m a junior in college now and often have to make myself go back and listen or read this speech as a reminder of my choices. I’ve ALWAYS loved this. David Foster Wallace may you Rest In Peace sir.
Every time when I feel frustrated or lost. I will come back and listen to this speech again and remind myself: this is water. I’m so lucky that I heard this speech ten years ago when I was still a university student and kind of well-prepared for my real adult life. Still experiencing ups and downs in my life giving that I’m 32, but I keep reminding myself, don’t forget to think. This is water, this is water.
So true, im 35 though and feel like skipped my 20s. I really wish I would have not broken up with really good men I dated in my 20s. I didnt realize how much less attention I would get from men in my 30s. If I would have been more aware of my surroundings and moments, I would have been married with kids. This video would have saved me from my current circumstances. Fingers crossed that now that Im aware, I will notice a good man's interest in me soon.
There are some aspects that didn’t age well. The main point is still good, but, we’ve come a bit in deciding that telling rich privileged people to feel better about having to deal with fat, old poor people is a little… cringey. - And in fact the larger point of this advice is for everyone. - Still, it’s a speech written to address very privileged people bc that’s the college it was at.
I admire DFW so much, his understanding of the human condition was so distilled. Living half his life battling crippling depression, there comes a point where life and the nature of reality itself has to be distilled in this way for one to make it to the next day. I am saddened that he took his own life but also understand the decision completely, having once attempted suicide myself. I am still here, and this resonates with me every day, unconsciously. This is water.
@Kay Mitchell I've seen this speech and "preached" it so many times, I tear from the joy of being part of the "oneness of the universe" as he put it, it's so touching, so humbling, to be aware of once place on the earth. I appreciate more than I ever have in my life due to this man and his speech. I am so so very sad we've lost this great man, I would've loved to hear and/or meet him in person.
I've lived by this mindset ever since I started high school, and I've been a lot more patient with people than I used to be because of it. It's a healthy mindset and one that I believe everyone should have.
Years ago I used to listen to this video on repeat at the end of the day. Now I have my ADHD diagnosis. Thanks Dave, for helping me through a rough period of time. You sure had words for someone who felt disconnected. My sense of otherness put into words. You knew what you were talking about. Rest in Peace man. This is my undiagnosed ADHD speech. You are my hero
It kinda makes you feel weird knowing that a man who could distill life down so distinctly still ended up hanging himself from a rafter in his home. Life's so strange.
Everyone on the entire planet should have to watch this once a year. I will forever be grateful to my college professor that had us watch this, I've watched it at least once a year since then.
8 years later, this hit me like a rock. Honestly, a little emotional as time goes by so quickly I tend to look through good and bad times. If I take a second to think and relax and enjoy both good and bad times I feel as if I'd live a happier life. Thank you.
I come back to this video at least once a year, sometimes more. The full speech is available as well, but this version is editorial and fast. I can always find the time to listen to it again, take a breath, and remember to choose.
I've been coming back for years to this video. I literally do this in default now. It took a few years of active reminding. and it's changed how I see the world actually.... empathy is so important. And always appreciated.
I remember when I first watched this so many years ago when I was in middle school. It reshaped how I viewed the world and has stuck with me ever since. The biggest challenge in life is empathizing with strangers even when suffering through the stressful moments of life. To remember that other people have lives too.
Can you tell me about your experience with This Is Water in middle school? I am a middle school teacher right now and have loved this video for years, and I am trying to find a way to offer this to the kids in an impactful and useful way. How did your teacher handle that lesson? Thank you
@@eS-ql7vm It wasn't part of a lesson, this video just popped up in my recommendations so I figured I'd watch it with no context as to what it was about. The middle school mention was just to give an idea of how old I was at the time. I think this would be a great lesson though and I hope you find a way to integrate it into your class. Best of Luck!
@@eS-ql7vm I've been thinking about your comment and this video for a bit because I do support your goal in sharing this video. Thinking back to who I was when I watched this, I'd say that it really changed my behavior in how I treated those around me. Before I had a lot of bullying tendencies that I was completely unaware of. Watching this video made me notice them and inspired me to change myself. While the videos specific focus on adulthood might make the lesson a bit harder for kids to connect to, I think you should try applying it in some kind anti-bullying unit since it addresses some of that mentality. I hope this is helpful to you.
@@eS-ql7vm honestly, if anything just express it as something dear to you. Let them know that it helped you in your life. Many of the kids that age probably will dismiss it openly amongst their peers, but I promise many will secretly be interested out of respect and love for their teacher. Those are the types of impressions that may not have obvious immediate results but years later kids remember and then hopefully stumble upon it again later in life. Just a thought. Also, thank you for trying to pass this on to our youth. Although I don't have kids of my own, I appreciate and see the value of teachers like you. You are the True heroes and the most important influence (besides parents) that our kids have these days ❤️
This man and speech should be an inspiration to all people that the world is not all about us, its about caring, love, and compassion for people everywhere. We are no different, so why should we think differently? The only thing different about us is what we choose to believe in and the way we think.
So true Jasen, we often, in light of or biases and overwhelming focus on "self", we lose out on the opportunity to truly connect, embrace and celebrate each others uniqueness.
My high school teacher played this video for me almost 10 years ago and I watch it probably once a month. I do my best to live by this and hope one day to be able to *truly* understand what this speech means. Shout-out Danny-Z, you make more of a difference on this Earth than you will ever comprehend.
same here, my freshman year high school speech teacher made us listen to this. i just graduated college last month and i still come back to it all the time. i’m planning my first tattoo around this speech
Wow, so many of us have, me included, fallen victim to thinking with "The automatic unconscious belief that I am the center of the world, and that my immediate needs and feelings are what should determine the worlds priorities."
by any chance have you seen the full commencement speech? while this is amazing, the full speech is much more powerful! czcams.com/video/ms2BvRbjOYo/video.html
I share this video with everyone I mentor and support, family, friends and anyone else that I can share it with. For me, it is a True reflection of the issues that people feel and experience, day in and day out. Thank you David.
Years after my first watch of this I finally understand what It means, but not yet how it feels. After having jobs for 5+ years of day in day out frustrations I finally found myself at a great job getting the opportunities I deserve. And still have very simple and bitter frustrations. But when I think back to this video it helped me move on through those grueling terrible jobs. I always tried to think of things in other people’s perspective while I was trying my hardest and others merely got by with what they were asked to do. 4 years later I watch this for the second time and I was In tears of how real it was and how sad it makes me that I was once so naive to my elders, that I thought I truest was this first to do what I have done. And now I can fully comprehend that there are many who pass me by asking how is the water. And still, I ask myself what is water. But I know I’ll think back to this moment; as I have in years prior to when I first want her this video and I will still continue to learn.
I am 22 and learning my mistakes of not opening my eyes, ears, and heart, i should of listened to my parents and adults in my life to better my self. I’m a very angry but kind person. I get angry about people driving slow or being stuck in traffic which is a normal response but I could of used that energy to have a self reflection myself. I am slowly trying to better myself as a person. Going back to college after 4 years of working, and seeing this video in English class really helped open my eyes.
You know, I ran into this video some time in my freshman year of highschool. This video made me fear of a future like this and I told myself I'd make it different. Then I realized after graduating and going through this VERY routine every day with my current job, I'd stop and think of this. I always thought about others lives and situations, but this speech has forever added a layer of reality of awarness for myself and others. It scares me, but it also makes me appreciate it, because it reminds I'm not alone. I hope for the best for others, I'm not asking for it back, but I'd rather have a ton of others lives have a better routine than for JUST ME to have that better life routine.
I think what Wallace tried to say with a lot of his literature like “Pale King” and some of his short stories like “The soul is not a smithy” is that the true hero of our generation is not the one in front of a crowd cheering them on, It’s the people who power through tedious, boring, routine jobs, day in day out, while still managing to be caring, aware and loving of the people around them, there doesn’t have to be a grand narrative or climactic ending to the hero’s journey, it’s what we do in the everyday trenches of life what matters.
I come back to this video, week, after month, after year. I share it with as many people as I can, especially folks that I mentor. There are many amazing messages contained in this shot video.
I loved this speech and I think it's cool my teenager is learning about it in English class. I will say, it is really possible (and not great) to be too aware of the water. Sometimes, paying too much attention to others, being too empathetic to others, too "in the moment" of these mundane activities is a bad thing. It can be an excuse to not think about yourself enough and not to focus on your own happiness or unhappiness or success or failure or goals. Knowing and being sensitive to the fact that the neighbor has been diagnosed with cancer or the co-workers son died can knock me for a loop for days. Often it can be people I don't know or come in contact with. I can't proceed with my life as I become so concerned about them. An entire life can pass by just blissfully lost in these mundane times....because you can't find anything else more important to be focused on. That isn't so great.
Downwinder - that's an interesting thought and while I don't disagree, your comment makes me wonder a little more about the thought process behind it. I don't want to down play your genuine concern for others, even to the point that it is or could be debilitating for you in your life. I just find that we as humans naturally tend to be pretty selfish creatures and so making sure we find time for our own self interests is usually not a problem, for most us, myself included. In other words, we may feel some compassion for others, but it usually doesn't consume our thoughts to the point that we could miss out on life's satisfying moments. We do however naturally have a very difficult time relating to others and not being overly judgmental (again, myself included). I just wanted to say that I hope you don't avoid looking for ways to help others, in all of life's situations, simply for the fear that you might become overwhelmed by other peoples challenges and/or struggles. But again, that is a personal decision and if it really is too difficult for you then you should indeed take a few steps back, but I would say this is more of an exception than most. For some reason, I seem to repeatedly stubble on a common sediment in our society, that we need to be vehemently conscious about our own self interesting and put ourselves first, before we can be healthy enough to help others. I'm not implying that you were saying this, your comment just made me think of this reoccurring idea. The idea that some how we need to be careful, that we don't become burdened by helping others to much or something similar to this types of thought. I guess my point is, that we as humans should never have this problem, because we are just too stink'in good at taking care of NUMERO UNO!!! We are simply selfish in nature, it takes a very concerted effort to truly look for way to help others and not just help them... but also try to uplift those we come in contact with. So I wouldn't be too worried about continually trying to find ways to help others, in every aspect of your life (that goes for all of us). Sorry for the unsolicited insight, I just wanted to put this insight out there to possibly help others that may be feeling or also hearing this kind of cautionary sediment.
It isn't that at all. It's about knowing yourself and your situation. And not randomly getting pissed bcuz you've been inconvenienced by a situation that might seem below yourself....when everyone else who is getting pissed at the same situation is below you on the food chain.its not saying your difficulties do not matter. Just saying others might have to live a more difficult truth than you.
I'm watching this for an assignment for my first year back in school in 20 years. I've been struggling with myself and life in general and my god, I'm so glad my professor used this video. Such an amazing way to look at how life works and how I can function in it.
The default setting kills or joy of life and steals the momentum of possibilities of greatness from our lives. We have a choice moment by moment to make a shift and change our mind and the world! Empathy Compassion patience openness to other ways of dealing with situations and the world will create a better world a better life for everyone. This is what I was taught as a young child and have tried to live. as a day in and day out. As I age It has become ever increasingly important.
I suppress the grocery store dynamics by being conscious of the human efforts that go into the store. That I have stores everywhere to shop for most things. How glorious and privileged am I. We under value life. By taking a journey to be conscious as mentioned in the video, you'll likely establish new frontiers to take your mind. By doing so you may fall in love with much of the world.
I was feeling that the other day on a midnight grocery store run. I felt humbled by all the work that goes into this smooth, seamless life I live, and I felt humbled to be walking the aisles around people whose lives are quiet and dignified in ways that I will never experience. Very grateful. Very grateful.
Perception is reality. You get to CHOOSE how you perceive the world. It can be either the scratched, fogged lenses of mistakes or regrets, framed and formed by past experiences and preconceptions, or choose to perceive the world through clear lenses, untarnished by previous maladaptation or reliance on past experiences. Awake every morning with the sense that it is a new day, full of infinite possibilities, and REALIZE that we are all unique individuals with our flaws and our merits. Choose to focus on the positive, expect the best, and plan for the worst. LIVE moment to moment, for time is the most precious commodity we have, and wasting it with negative thought patterns or cognitive distortions rob you of that precious time every day. Instead of wasting time with scratched lenses, take the time upon waking every morning to mentally clear those lenses and set about the day being mindful that you may be the center of your universe, but there all billions of universes, and they have all gone through their unique creation processes. You can CHOOSE what lenses to perceive reality through, so choose clear ones. Then experience the reality you perceive.
It was Years ago when I first watched this video. It made such an impression on me that when I was in line at the grocery store, his words popped into my head, and I changed my thoughts. I calm down; I see the situation from a different perspective. I am more empathetic. Thanks D.F.W., RIP.
This is a concise view of a lot of the lessons my dad gave me growing up. The one's I found so annoyong as a child but have come to so deeply value since. I just wasn't ready to hear, but they influence how I view the world.
When I was in highschool, my history teacher showed us thi video and it taught me a lot. By far, it is one of my favorite speeches on the perception of day to day life for the average adult.
I love this speech, and there is a lot of truth in it, that is how it probably should be. Never judge, without knowing all there is to consider. But this way of thinking is also tiring, because you can not think about every single person, what might make them behave the way they do. There has to be a way, a compromise between the default setting and a healthy and compassionate society.
I think this video drastically underrepresents the difficulty and amount of time this perspective change can take- I have been told these things for years and I still, in my mid-30s, have trouble with empathy and emotional responses to circumstances, outside stimuli, and human behavior. It takes a lot of serious time and effort, self-reflection, meditation, and therapy for me to force myself into a mindset that is both happy AND tolerant...and it still feels like I'm brainwashing or gaslighting myself half the time. The amount of ego I have to control and unfairness I have to ignore is STAGGERING. This video almost makes it seems like an epiphany, or a switch you can just turn. Maybe it was that way for others...but for me this is incredibly difficult, and I only do it because I have to better myself before I can better anything else.
Well, I think the epiphany is the realization that you need to TRY to think this way. Once you've had that epiphany, then you are 100% correct -- the discipline and practice it takes to think this way even MOST of the time is tremendous. I am over 60 and I am sorry to say I'm probably no better at it than you are in your 30s. But the important thing is -- we're both trying. At least -- that's my take. YMMV
I was shown this when I was younger and it made such an impression on me. Changed my life. ‘Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen) by Baz Luhrmann was my bible as a child. These 2 pieces sculpted my beliefs. They have remained with me throughout my life. Extremely impactful.
Good god, this video lives in my head rent free and I’m ok with this. I will be the first to admit, without my ex I would have never known this video. To that, I am grateful.
Coming back over the years, this video really did change my life; it changed how I viewed life in general. It is just so easy to forget that other people are just as complex as you are. It is so easy to see strangers as one dimensional beings who are just actors in your life, because it is infinitely simple to define reality as being in some relation to your experience of it. People are complicated. I am complicated. You are complicated. Life is not black and white for any of us, even though it may seem like the color of complexity is only painted by our involvement. Even more than that, it is so tempting to ascribe negative or impure intentions into others. It makes things easier, because *you* are right. “Other people are wrong, and they are wrong because they want to be and that makes them bad people.” But people travel such different paths, and weight their values through the sum of their own experience, just like we do. Those experiences exist, even though it is hard to truly believe and understand that. Granted, occasionally there are people who are super petty and one dimensional, but even then there is a reason they are like that, and almost always the capacity to change. Few people are truly irredeemable, and almost as few are so *wrong* as to actually need redeemed. They just believe differently, see differently, because they *lived* differently. I’m not saying to believe the best in people, just as DFW is not saying that, it’s just good to try and understand that the color of experience is not something unique to each of us.
They did a great job with the video but it’s only half of the speech. I think it’s so much more powerful in its entirety. Try watching the one “after skool” posted:)
@@b16b68 idk, as a college grad I loved the full thing but I don't think the "abridged" is any less powerful. I can have anyone listen to this anytime, any background and have it relevant. The missing parts are pretty solidify directed at graduating students.
Because always remember, if you and your fellow man are stuck in a consumeristic hell hole where no one has experienced real peace and joy and relaxation in months and you feel miserable, you can always choose to be happy instead. I'm sorry, I might be missing the point but all you told me is that my real freedom is only in my mind, and I can be angry and miserable about the way the world works or I can peacefully accept that EVERYONE is struggling and just be happy that I'm not struggling as much as some theoretical stranger? I feel like the real truth is that we should talk more and help each other out more and people should get paid more and there should be more vacation days and opportunities that don't trap you in cyclical burnout. Idk this seems like a Band-Aid type of response and if it makes your life better, fantastic! But I want to break this cycle and find joy in things other than mutual suffering.
I feel more trapped by this speech. The idea that our world is so unliveable that we are only "free" in our imagination? We have to forcibly ignore the very fixable real world and just accept it as it is? He mentioned a lot of problems that we as a society can fix but our leaders are ignoring. The check out lines not having enough lanes for example could have been fixed by the leaders of the stores who decide that their profits are more important than the time of every single human being in the community their store serves. They could fix that problem by adding more clerks and it would improve countless peoples quality of life and lead to less overall misery being passed around
I get the point of the speech, but shouldn't we be equally concerned about the fact that we're living in the consumer hell he is describing rather than just attempting to rationalize it with empathy? There's a reason that we're all miserable living like this.
My Creative writing teacher showed me this video 9 years ago when I was 17 and about to graduate high school and go to college. This stuck with me since that day he showed me and ever since than I come back to this video at the most random times in my life but boy how my perspective has changed on life and how much this video means to me now
Congratulations to you! I'm so happy to hear this was helpful. Feel free to stop by anytime as there are many others who make it a habit of revisiting this video during times of difficulty and/or transition.
Whenever I find that I'm just a little too angry with that person who cut me off in traffic, too fed up that there's so many people in the grocery store trying to look at the exact same thing I'm looking at, I take a couple deep breaths and say to myself, "this is water." And the more I do it, the easier it gets. This video changed my life. I think someday I might get a tattoo of a goldfish or "this is water" to remind me of the things that are important
Sonder n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own-populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness-an epic story that continues invisibly around you like an anthill sprawling deep underground, with elaborate passageways to thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might appear only once, as an extra sipping coffee in the background, as a blur of traffic passing on the highway, as a lighted window at dusk.
The idea that every person in the entire world has a life and consciousness as complicated as my own is something I think about often and always have. Just because it’s interesting. This video I hope will make me think about the meaning of that when I am frustrated with others for no reason other than the fact that they happen to be near me. I have to recognize that they are equally as frustrated with my presence.
You guys are so lucky. I wish this would've been the case for all previous students. Thanks for sharing this. I didn't know. It's nice to know some schools are teaching more useful life skills earlier now.
My philosophy professor showed me this video when I was on 9th grade. I am in my first year of college now, and what may have been just another class, for me this was a determining moment in my life, I haven’t been able to forget this video and every once in a while I take a look at it again, it makes me feel as awoke as the first time I saw it
About to teach this speech to my Comp 101 class for a rhetorical analysis assignment. Hoping it speaks to them as more than just an assignment/grade. Wish I had been assigned it when I was an undergrad; it would've made those four years of tedium, frustration, boredom, and misunderstanding way more durable.
At the end of every school year, as a teacher, I play this video for my students. I always wish to leave them with an understanding of empathy, an understanding of the struggles of others. Today's the day I show it again. What a year.
💯
Thank you. I watched this some years back, and liked it. I just remembered it, today, and watched the whole thing. Well, I listened, the still image useless. But watching yours, the points are made clear.
I do not have that default setting, and never have. For this I am grateful beyond measure! The idea the universe revolves around me is so amazingly wrong that it is “non-logical reasoning” defined.
If I may suggest, another good speech to have your students hear is "Class of 99; Wear Sunscreen". They're some things that only life can teach and these two videos are good attempts to do that.
Thanks for helping others with your time, appreciate you
I wish I had more teachers like you when I was younger. Thank you for being you man
*Producer:* Wanna be in my short film?
*Lady:* Alright.
"...this _fat_ dead-eyed lady..."
Ded
Ye but money
Sorry, ma'am; that was just my natural default setting talking.
I literally looked at this comment right as he said "fat, dead eyed lady". I fucking lost it.
HELP
This video literally changed my life. The first time I watched it, my way of looking at life did a complete 180 and I have never gone back. When I feel myself slipping I come back to this video to remind myself.
Same here brother. I still watch it occasionally and it makes me cry every time
Yes! I do the same thing. Every so often I find myself in a slump and find my way back to this speach. Every time I feel much better and the message sinks further into my consciousness. Beautiful message. This is water. This is water ❤️🥲
@@monkehgamingofficial im glad im not the only one who starts bawling every time i come back here. hope you're doing well friend
That this, is water.
I do the same
I feel like this video helps me understand how we should see the world around us and how to be compassionate towards others. We should think less about ourselves and learn how to just be a better person. I hope whoever is reading this has a great day. May God bless you and guide your lives. He loves and cares about you. Trust in God :)
I've always remembered this video for years and I always refer back to it. Thanks for the upload
SAME! I finally chocked up the money and bought a collection of his essays on my Kindle today and immediately remembered this and had to come watch it... again! Probably one of the best videos I ever stumbled upon here on CZcams.
Same. After all these years since I first read the full thing, it's one of the most bluntly meaningful speeches I've encountered. RIP David Foster Wallace.
Read "They Myth of Sisyphus" by Albert Camus if you like this concept
@@Squidkingdom +1 to that. Been a while since I read Camus but love that book.
Saw this video for the first time in high school, I’m now a college graduate but still refer back to it when times get tuff
sonder
n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own...
“Everybody is identical in their secret unspoken belief that way deep down they are different from everyone else.”
David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest
I have Sonder tattooed on my arm as a reminder everyday
sonder
Just not true. Some people have 70 IQ and some have 170 IQ. Some people sit and watch TV and some people orchestrate the planet.
Haha I was trying to think of that word while listening to the speech! Lovely word
My English teacher had a whole assignment centered around this speech in 11th grade. I’m a junior in college now and often have to make myself go back and listen or read this speech as a reminder of my choices. I’ve ALWAYS loved this. David Foster Wallace may you Rest In Peace sir.
My favorite part of this is the "that will never be me" laughter from the crowd.
Every time when I feel frustrated or lost. I will come back and listen to this speech again and remind myself: this is water. I’m so lucky that I heard this speech ten years ago when I was still a university student and kind of well-prepared for my real adult life. Still experiencing ups and downs in my life giving that I’m 32, but I keep reminding myself, don’t forget to think. This is water, this is water.
So true, im 35 though and feel like skipped my 20s. I really wish I would have not broken up with really good men I dated in my 20s. I didnt realize how much less attention I would get from men in my 30s. If I would have been more aware of my surroundings and moments, I would have been married with kids. This video would have saved me from my current circumstances. Fingers crossed that now that Im aware, I will notice a good man's interest in me soon.
This is absolutely incredible. This changed my life. I need to watch this again every now and then.
I often come back myself and watch this several times a year when I need to "realign".
Thanks for stopping by!
A decade later and this is still gold!
There are some aspects that didn’t age well. The main point is still good, but, we’ve come a bit in deciding that telling rich privileged people to feel better about having to deal with fat, old poor people is a little… cringey. - And in fact the larger point of this advice is for everyone. - Still, it’s a speech written to address very privileged people bc that’s the college it was at.
@@joed180Even if you're correct about the audience it was written to address, the message remains the same
Every couple of years I come back to this video - so good
I admire DFW so much, his understanding of the human condition was so distilled. Living half his life battling crippling depression, there comes a point where life and the nature of reality itself has to be distilled in this way for one to make it to the next day. I am saddened that he took his own life but also understand the decision completely, having once attempted suicide myself. I am still here, and this resonates with me every day, unconsciously. This is water.
What do you mean?
@Kay Mitchell that's facts, the scary thing too is how easy it is to fall into it and be ok with it. It fucks your default mode. Shit sucks
How are you now?
Yes. Update??
Still here.
this video truly inspired me, its sad this intelligent man is gone
Dude I tear up every time I heard this speech. What a great man we've lost...
@Kay Mitchell I've seen this speech and "preached" it so many times, I tear from the joy of being part of the "oneness of the universe" as he put it, it's so touching, so humbling, to be aware of once place on the earth. I appreciate more than I ever have in my life due to this man and his speech. I am so so very sad we've lost this great man, I would've loved to hear and/or meet him in person.
Jasen Remer yup. Just reading the critics here is depressing.
I watch this video every 6 months or so and it's made my life exponentially better and more full.
This video is the best therapy session in my life. I have periodically referred back to it over the years.
I'm here thanks to my therapist lol
I've lived by this mindset ever since I started high school, and I've been a lot more patient with people than I used to be because of it. It's a healthy mindset and one that I believe everyone should have.
I’m just going to say it: this is the greatest speech ever written, and it’s not even close.
Brilliant. Inspiring. A wonderful reminder to this 83 yr old that learning, refreshing one's understanding of values is not limited by age.
you gave me tears. :)
This video can be summarized in one word.... EMPATHY 🌟
Years ago I used to listen to this video on repeat at the end of the day.
Now I have my ADHD diagnosis. Thanks Dave, for helping me through a rough period of time. You sure had words for someone who felt disconnected. My sense of otherness put into words. You knew what you were talking about. Rest in Peace man. This is my undiagnosed ADHD speech. You are my hero
Idk why but this video makes me tear up every time I watch it. This message has helped me be an optimistic person in some of my toughest moments.
Same here. I don't know why either, but I think he really touches a nerve on what it is to be a truly aware human being.
It kinda makes you feel weird knowing that a man who could distill life down so distinctly still ended up hanging himself from a rafter in his home. Life's so strange.
Try therapy.
Everyone on the entire planet should have to watch this once a year. I will forever be grateful to my college professor that had us watch this, I've watched it at least once a year since then.
I come back to this year in and year out. I am still moved by the message. This is Water. X
8 years later, this hit me like a rock. Honestly, a little emotional as time goes by so quickly I tend to look through good and bad times. If I take a second to think and relax and enjoy both good and bad times I feel as if I'd live a happier life. Thank you.
I come back to this video at least once a year, sometimes more. The full speech is available as well, but this version is editorial and fast. I can always find the time to listen to it again, take a breath, and remember to choose.
It's been almost ten years since I watched this . A great reminder thank you
Glad you enjoyed it
I've been coming back for years to this video. I literally do this in default now. It took a few years of active reminding. and it's changed how I see the world actually.... empathy is so important. And always appreciated.
I remember when I first watched this so many years ago when I was in middle school. It reshaped how I viewed the world and has stuck with me ever since. The biggest challenge in life is empathizing with strangers even when suffering through the stressful moments of life. To remember that other people have lives too.
Emily Mutchler it the worthiest challenge to take on. Kudos to you for trying.
Can you tell me about your experience with This Is Water in middle school? I am a middle school teacher right now and have loved this video for years, and I am trying to find a way to offer this to the kids in an impactful and useful way. How did your teacher handle that lesson? Thank you
@@eS-ql7vm It wasn't part of a lesson, this video just popped up in my recommendations so I figured I'd watch it with no context as to what it was about. The middle school mention was just to give an idea of how old I was at the time. I think this would be a great lesson though and I hope you find a way to integrate it into your class. Best of Luck!
@@eS-ql7vm I've been thinking about your comment and this video for a bit because I do support your goal in sharing this video. Thinking back to who I was when I watched this, I'd say that it really changed my behavior in how I treated those around me. Before I had a lot of bullying tendencies that I was completely unaware of. Watching this video made me notice them and inspired me to change myself. While the videos specific focus on adulthood might make the lesson a bit harder for kids to connect to, I think you should try applying it in some kind anti-bullying unit since it addresses some of that mentality. I hope this is helpful to you.
@@eS-ql7vm honestly, if anything just express it as something dear to you. Let them know that it helped you in your life. Many of the kids that age probably will dismiss it openly amongst their peers, but I promise many will secretly be interested out of respect and love for their teacher. Those are the types of impressions that may not have obvious immediate results but years later kids remember and then hopefully stumble upon it again later in life. Just a thought. Also, thank you for trying to pass this on to our youth. Although I don't have kids of my own, I appreciate and see the value of teachers like you. You are the True heroes and the most important influence (besides parents) that our kids have these days ❤️
This man and speech should be an inspiration to all people that the world is not all about us, its about caring, love, and compassion for people everywhere. We are no different, so why should we think differently? The only thing different about us is what we choose to believe in and the way we think.
So true Jasen, we often, in light of or biases and overwhelming focus on "self", we lose out on the opportunity to truly connect, embrace and celebrate each others uniqueness.
“Everybody is identical in their secret unspoken belief that way deep down they are different from everyone else.”
David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest
My high school teacher played this video for me almost 10 years ago and I watch it probably once a month. I do my best to live by this and hope one day to be able to *truly* understand what this speech means. Shout-out Danny-Z, you make more of a difference on this Earth than you will ever comprehend.
same here, my freshman year high school speech teacher made us listen to this. i just graduated college last month and i still come back to it all the time. i’m planning my first tattoo around this speech
The well adjusted people in the shopping line going “ i know right?”.
I was showed this video once a few years ago and i still reflect on it, so glad I’ve found it again.
Wow, so many of us have, me included, fallen victim to thinking with "The automatic unconscious belief that I am the center of the world, and that my immediate needs and feelings are what should determine the worlds priorities."
Main Character Syndrome
I'm here because of a 10-year-old Reddit comment about a guy and his dying arborist friend
Fellow redditor in the wild
@@imabeast2125 please don't call me that
Thanks Will Wheaton for pointing me in the direction of this inspirational video. I'm in my 60's and it's taken me a lifetime to work this stuff out.
Thank you for watching!
This is by far, the best commencement speech ever given. I watch this intermittently to remind myself.
by any chance have you seen the full commencement speech? while this is amazing, the full speech is much more powerful! czcams.com/video/ms2BvRbjOYo/video.html
This is water = This is life
We remind ourselves we are human, we support each other rather than expressing our frustration on one another!
I was just asking what he meant by this is water?
I share this video with everyone I mentor and support, family, friends and anyone else that I can share it with. For me, it is a True reflection of the issues that people feel and experience, day in and day out. Thank you David.
I needed this at my graduation instead , this is real wisdom
Tried and true wisdom never gets old. Thanks for stopping by!
Years after my first watch of this I finally understand what It means, but not yet how it feels. After having jobs for 5+ years of day in day out frustrations I finally found myself at a great job getting the opportunities I deserve. And still have very simple and bitter frustrations. But when I think back to this video it helped me move on through those grueling terrible jobs. I always tried to think of things in other people’s perspective while I was trying my hardest and others merely got by with what they were asked to do. 4 years later I watch this for the second time and I was In tears of how real it was and how sad it makes me that I was once so naive to my elders, that I thought I truest was this first to do what I have done. And now I can fully comprehend that there are many who pass me by asking how is the water. And still, I ask myself what is water. But I know I’ll think back to this moment; as I have in years prior to when I first want her this video and I will still continue to learn.
I am 22 and learning my mistakes of not opening my eyes, ears, and heart, i should of listened to my parents and adults in my life to better my self. I’m a very angry but kind person. I get angry about people driving slow or being stuck in traffic which is a normal response but I could of used that energy to have a self reflection myself. I am slowly trying to better myself as a person. Going back to college after 4 years of working, and seeing this video in English class really helped open my eyes.
@@Dotakid99 same here my friend
You know, I ran into this video some time in my freshman year of highschool. This video made me fear of a future like this and I told myself I'd make it different. Then I realized after graduating and going through this VERY routine every day with my current job, I'd stop and think of this. I always thought about others lives and situations, but this speech has forever added a layer of reality of awarness for myself and others. It scares me, but it also makes me appreciate it, because it reminds I'm not alone. I hope for the best for others, I'm not asking for it back, but I'd rather have a ton of others lives have a better routine than for JUST ME to have that better life routine.
Che Suriel I really, really appreciate this comment. I wish you all the best that your eyes can and no doubt will bring you. Cheers, Che.
@@eS-ql7vm Thanks, I appreciate that!
I think what Wallace tried to say with a lot of his literature like “Pale King” and some of his short stories like “The soul is not a smithy” is that the true hero of our generation is not the one in front of a crowd cheering them on, It’s the people who power through tedious, boring, routine jobs, day in day out, while still managing to be caring, aware and loving of the people around them, there doesn’t have to be a grand narrative or climactic ending to the hero’s journey, it’s what we do in the everyday trenches of life what matters.
@@adrianwallenborg7396 this is a fantastic take. Thank you for your perspective ❤️
I come back to this video, week, after month, after year. I share it with as many people as I can, especially folks that I mentor. There are many amazing messages contained in this shot video.
Thank you for watching and SHARING!
i agree! i share it yearly, at the least! so amazing. RIP DFW!
My first time seeing this. God I wish everyone had this kind of mentality
I loved this speech and I think it's cool my teenager is learning about it in English class. I will say, it is really possible (and not great) to be too aware of the water. Sometimes, paying too much attention to others, being too empathetic to others, too "in the moment" of these mundane activities is a bad thing.
It can be an excuse to not think about yourself enough and not to focus on your own happiness or unhappiness or success or failure or goals.
Knowing and being sensitive to the fact that the neighbor has been diagnosed with cancer or the co-workers son died can knock me for a loop for days. Often it can be people I don't know or come in contact with. I can't proceed with my life as I become so concerned about them.
An entire life can pass by just blissfully lost in these mundane times....because you can't find anything else more important to be focused on. That isn't so great.
Downwinder - that's an interesting thought and while I don't disagree, your comment makes me wonder a little more about the thought process behind it. I don't want to down play your genuine concern for others, even to the point that it is or could be debilitating for you in your life.
I just find that we as humans naturally tend to be pretty selfish creatures and so making sure we find time for our own self interests is usually not a problem, for most us, myself included. In other words, we may feel some compassion for others, but it usually doesn't consume our thoughts to the point that we could miss out on life's satisfying moments. We do however naturally have a very difficult time relating to others and not being overly judgmental (again, myself included). I just wanted to say that I hope you don't avoid looking for ways to help others, in all of life's situations, simply for the fear that you might become overwhelmed by other peoples challenges and/or struggles. But again, that is a personal decision and if it really is too difficult for you then you should indeed take a few steps back, but I would say this is more of an exception than most.
For some reason, I seem to repeatedly stubble on a common sediment in our society, that we need to be vehemently conscious about our own self interesting and put ourselves first, before we can be healthy enough to help others. I'm not implying that you were saying this, your comment just made me think of this reoccurring idea. The idea that some how we need to be careful, that we don't become burdened by helping others to much or something similar to this types of thought.
I guess my point is, that we as humans should never have this problem, because we are just too stink'in good at taking care of NUMERO UNO!!! We are simply selfish in nature, it takes a very concerted effort to truly look for way to help others and not just help them... but also try to uplift those we come in contact with. So I wouldn't be too worried about continually trying to find ways to help others, in every aspect of your life (that goes for all of us). Sorry for the unsolicited insight, I just wanted to put this insight out there to possibly help others that may be feeling or also hearing this kind of cautionary sediment.
It isn't that at all. It's about knowing yourself and your situation. And not randomly getting pissed bcuz you've been inconvenienced by a situation that might seem below yourself....when everyone else who is getting pissed at the same situation is below you on the food chain.its not saying your difficulties do not matter. Just saying others might have to live a more difficult truth than you.
Had to watch this for a class, brought me to tears. Such a beautiful message
I'm watching this for an assignment for my first year back in school in 20 years. I've been struggling with myself and life in general and my god, I'm so glad my professor used this video. Such an amazing way to look at how life works and how I can function in it.
yo who here cuz ur professor sent u?
gang gang
Loll
Psy 111 here lol
@@markfletton5901 bruh, lmao. who just decides on their own free will to watch this goober shit?
Me lol
The default setting kills or joy of life and steals the momentum of possibilities of greatness from our lives. We have a choice moment by moment to make a shift and change our mind and the world! Empathy Compassion patience openness to other ways of dealing with situations and the world will create a better world a better life for everyone. This is what I was taught as a young child and have tried to live. as a day in and day out. As I age It has become ever increasingly important.
I suppress the grocery store dynamics by being conscious of the human efforts that go into the store. That I have stores everywhere to shop for most things. How glorious and privileged am I. We under value life. By taking a journey to be conscious as mentioned in the video, you'll likely establish new frontiers to take your mind. By doing so you may fall in love with much of the world.
I was feeling that the other day on a midnight grocery store run. I felt humbled by all the work that goes into this smooth, seamless life I live, and I felt humbled to be walking the aisles around people whose lives are quiet and dignified in ways that I will never experience. Very grateful. Very grateful.
Most amazing story/anecdote/wisdom of my life. Love it. Sorry he is gone...
Perception is reality. You get to CHOOSE how you perceive the world. It can be either the scratched, fogged lenses of mistakes or regrets, framed and formed by past experiences and preconceptions, or choose to perceive the world through clear lenses, untarnished by previous maladaptation or reliance on past experiences.
Awake every morning with the sense that it is a new day, full of infinite possibilities, and REALIZE that we are all unique individuals with our flaws and our merits. Choose to focus on the positive, expect the best, and plan for the worst. LIVE moment to moment, for time is the most precious commodity we have, and wasting it with negative thought patterns or cognitive distortions rob you of that precious time every day.
Instead of wasting time with scratched lenses, take the time upon waking every morning to mentally clear those lenses and set about the day being mindful that you may be the center of your universe, but there all billions of universes, and they have all gone through their unique creation processes.
You can CHOOSE what lenses to perceive reality through, so choose clear ones. Then experience the reality you perceive.
It was Years ago when I first watched this video. It made such an impression on me that when I was in line at the grocery store, his words popped into my head, and I changed my thoughts. I calm down; I see the situation from a different perspective. I am more empathetic. Thanks D.F.W., RIP.
If nothing else, remember the word “choosing”. That’s your superpower and key to tranquility.
Whoever you are, watching this right now, you are wonderful. You are strong. Youll make it through this.
I watch this once a year to remind myself about the "water". Thank you for making this.
Sono tornata apposta ad ascoltare queste parole, per torenare ad avere fiducia, a riprendere la prospettiva giusta. Grazie grazie grazie.
I don’t even remember what teacher or when this was shown to me, but it’s still one my fave pieces of media ever thanks for uploading!
This is a concise view of a lot of the lessons my dad gave me growing up. The one's I found so annoyong as a child but have come to so deeply value since. I just wasn't ready to hear, but they influence how I view the world.
When ever I feel overwhelmed and stressed I like to listen to this video
I watched this video when I was 12 and it changed my life literally forever
When I was in highschool, my history teacher showed us thi video and it taught me a lot. By far, it is one of my favorite speeches on the perception of day to day life for the average adult.
This video, this speech changed my life. It changed my way to think, to see others and to live everyday life.
I love this speech, and there is a lot of truth in it, that is how it probably should be. Never judge, without knowing all there is to consider. But this way of thinking is also tiring, because you can not think about every single person, what might make them behave the way they do. There has to be a way, a compromise between the default setting and a healthy and compassionate society.
I’ve been watching this video for years it seems, I periodically come back and watch it to get my mind right.
This kind of thing is why I try to turn every monotonous moment in my life into a game or an opportunity for creativity.
I think this video drastically underrepresents the difficulty and amount of time this perspective change can take- I have been told these things for years and I still, in my mid-30s, have trouble with empathy and emotional responses to circumstances, outside stimuli, and human behavior. It takes a lot of serious time and effort, self-reflection, meditation, and therapy for me to force myself into a mindset that is both happy AND tolerant...and it still feels like I'm brainwashing or gaslighting myself half the time. The amount of ego I have to control and unfairness I have to ignore is STAGGERING. This video almost makes it seems like an epiphany, or a switch you can just turn. Maybe it was that way for others...but for me this is incredibly difficult, and I only do it because I have to better myself before I can better anything else.
Well, I think the epiphany is the realization that you need to TRY to think this way. Once you've had that epiphany, then you are 100% correct -- the discipline and practice it takes to think this way even MOST of the time is tremendous. I am over 60 and I am sorry to say I'm probably no better at it than you are in your 30s. But the important thing is -- we're both trying. At least -- that's my take. YMMV
I was shown this when I was younger and it made such an impression on me. Changed my life. ‘Everybody’s Free (To Wear Sunscreen) by Baz Luhrmann was my bible as a child. These 2 pieces sculpted my beliefs. They have remained with me throughout my life. Extremely impactful.
That's amazing! Those are my two favorites as well. I share them with everyone 💚
Brilliant I watch it every year
Thank God for self-checkout
YES
I can't tell if this was a reference to his suicide or not lol
UNEXPECTED ITEM IN THE BAGGING AREA
and someone always needs help with it
@ash evildead I mean Walmart and other stores have always had only like 2-3 cashiers working registers regardless of self checkout
This video gets me thru my rageful days. I’ve had this in my back pocket since it came out 💕💕
R.I.P David Foster Wallace we miss you. I would of loved to see you on the Joe Rogan podcast
Good god, this video lives in my head rent free and I’m ok with this. I will be the first to admit, without my ex I would have never known this video. To that, I am grateful.
Great, great video by a wise teacher. Sorry to see that he is no longer with us.
Coming back over the years, this video really did change my life; it changed how I viewed life in general. It is just so easy to forget that other people are just as complex as you are. It is so easy to see strangers as one dimensional beings who are just actors in your life, because it is infinitely simple to define reality as being in some relation to your experience of it.
People are complicated. I am complicated. You are complicated. Life is not black and white for any of us, even though it may seem like the color of complexity is only painted by our involvement.
Even more than that, it is so tempting to ascribe negative or impure intentions into others. It makes things easier, because *you* are right. “Other people are wrong, and they are wrong because they want to be and that makes them bad people.” But people travel such different paths, and weight their values through the sum of their own experience, just like we do. Those experiences exist, even though it is hard to truly believe and understand that.
Granted, occasionally there are people who are super petty and one dimensional, but even then there is a reason they are like that, and almost always the capacity to change. Few people are truly irredeemable, and almost as few are so *wrong* as to actually need redeemed. They just believe differently, see differently, because they *lived* differently.
I’m not saying to believe the best in people, just as DFW is not saying that, it’s just good to try and understand that the color of experience is not something unique to each of us.
,.This video should be mandatory for College Graduates....beautiful
shout out to David, RIP my brother
Thinking happy thoughts feels better
Do we ever experience anything out side of ourselves..
🤩🙏
I really liked this but omg 😭 he didn't have to come for that lady like that.
They did a great job with the video but it’s only half of the speech. I think it’s so much more powerful in its entirety. Try watching the one “after skool” posted:)
@@b16b68 idk, as a college grad I loved the full thing but I don't think the "abridged" is any less powerful.
I can have anyone listen to this anytime, any background and have it relevant. The missing parts are pretty solidify directed at graduating students.
To be fair, Wallace was speaking about a generic character that we have all met. The person adding video to the narration made it personal lol.
Because always remember, if you and your fellow man are stuck in a consumeristic hell hole where no one has experienced real peace and joy and relaxation in months and you feel miserable, you can always choose to be happy instead. I'm sorry, I might be missing the point but all you told me is that my real freedom is only in my mind, and I can be angry and miserable about the way the world works or I can peacefully accept that EVERYONE is struggling and just be happy that I'm not struggling as much as some theoretical stranger? I feel like the real truth is that we should talk more and help each other out more and people should get paid more and there should be more vacation days and opportunities that don't trap you in cyclical burnout. Idk this seems like a Band-Aid type of response and if it makes your life better, fantastic! But I want to break this cycle and find joy in things other than mutual suffering.
I feel more trapped by this speech. The idea that our world is so unliveable that we are only "free" in our imagination? We have to forcibly ignore the very fixable real world and just accept it as it is? He mentioned a lot of problems that we as a society can fix but our leaders are ignoring. The check out lines not having enough lanes for example could have been fixed by the leaders of the stores who decide that their profits are more important than the time of every single human being in the community their store serves. They could fix that problem by adding more clerks and it would improve countless peoples quality of life and lead to less overall misery being passed around
Anyone else had to watch this in a school setting but is glad they did?
Who else is here because of the movie Soul?
Woah. Same
Sad movie
This is amazing and anyone in life no matter where they are can learn, grow, and take from this video. Absolutely Amazing.
I get the point of the speech, but shouldn't we be equally concerned about the fact that we're living in the consumer hell he is describing rather than just attempting to rationalize it with empathy? There's a reason that we're all miserable living like this.
Wow, I've revisited this commencement speech several times over the years and still hits as hard as the first time I've heard it. I miss DFW.
Leaving this comment so that whenever someone else comments on it I will be reminded to watch this video!
My Creative writing teacher showed me this video 9 years ago when I was 17 and about to graduate high school and go to college. This stuck with me since that day he showed me and ever since than I come back to this video at the most random times in my life but boy how my perspective has changed on life and how much this video means to me now
I’m graduating college in 4 months, and I’m so grateful that this was introduced to me today ❤
Congratulations to you! I'm so happy to hear this was helpful. Feel free to stop by anytime as there are many others who make it a habit of revisiting this video during times of difficulty and/or transition.
@@theactualizationagent Thank you!! I definitely will be back and I’ll bring more with me :)
Every time I watch this I tear up.
Thank you"it's me Andie" for sending me here.
Whenever I find that I'm just a little too angry with that person who cut me off in traffic, too fed up that there's so many people in the grocery store trying to look at the exact same thing I'm looking at, I take a couple deep breaths and say to myself, "this is water." And the more I do it, the easier it gets. This video changed my life. I think someday I might get a tattoo of a goldfish or "this is water" to remind me of the things that are important
Sonder
n. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own-populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness-an epic story that continues invisibly around you like an anthill sprawling deep underground, with elaborate passageways to thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might appear only once, as an extra sipping coffee in the background, as a blur of traffic passing on the highway, as a lighted window at dusk.
Rewatch this every year.
Everyone should be made listen to this 💯
The idea that every person in the entire world has a life and consciousness as complicated as my own is something I think about often and always have. Just because it’s interesting. This video I hope will make me think about the meaning of that when I am frustrated with others for no reason other than the fact that they happen to be near me. I have to recognize that they are equally as frustrated with my presence.
Thinking happy thoughts feels better 🤩🙏
Love coming back to this video every now and then
Your teachers show you this vid in freshman year hs and you dont really understand until you grow up and graduate highschool and live your own life.
You guys are so lucky. I wish this would've been the case for all previous students. Thanks for sharing this. I didn't know. It's nice to know some schools are teaching more useful life skills earlier now.
Shoot I graduated and you're right, I'm back here, watching this video and relate to it so much more than I did as a freshman
My philosophy professor showed me this video when I was on 9th grade. I am in my first year of college now, and what may have been just another class, for me this was a determining moment in my life, I haven’t been able to forget this video and every once in a while I take a look at it again, it makes me feel as awoke as the first time I saw it
About to teach this speech to my Comp 101 class for a rhetorical analysis assignment. Hoping it speaks to them as more than just an assignment/grade. Wish I had been assigned it when I was an undergrad; it would've made those four years of tedium, frustration, boredom, and misunderstanding way more durable.