I want to give you a hug, as an INFP who is also single but refuse to call myself self-partnered yet. Thanks for being sincere always. I wish I could meet someone like you gosh darn it. But so I was looking forward to taking me to this korean buffet-type restaurant but the minimum number of people per table is two. I don’t think they’ll take self-partnered as an explanation either.
Frank James maybe I’ll try it..... I don’t usually like going out by myself so I guess I don’t ever go out. But I also don’t really like going out in groups that much or with people where there’s not even at least a slight romantic interest.... just seems more fun if there is.... but I do not know or meet any people in which there is a slight romantic interest..... so yet again, another reason why I never go out. I don’t know.... I slightly feel depressed now. Lol There was another commenter that mentioned a Korean BBQ place.... and now I also want Korean BBQ. lol I have started going out one-on-one with different business prospects.... and since I know the conversation is going to be about me learning about them and what they do.... me likely helping them with ideas, etc.... those are pretty fun. Oh wait... this is supposed to be about me going out by myself. Ughhhhh.... okay.... maybe I’ll try it. If I do.... I’ll let you know how it goes. 🙏🌟☺️
I love the chill, talking, spill-your-thoughts vids like this. It’s reminds me of some of your older content. I like the new stuff too, but these are definitely my favorite :)
I know you are both just having fun but still your comments made me realize that when I allow myself to slow down and be *in* *the* *moment* , I can accomplish so much more - rather than trying to please someone else who doesn't truly get such things. I am married to someone who is loud and negative and anxious and very *surface* in conversations etc and it is mentally and physically exhausting.
I really missed your chilly talking videos. Don’t get me wrong I like the typology videos as well but I don’t know.. just listening to your thoughts is something I really enjoy
I've been recently telling people that I'd like to go on holiday myself. The usual response is 'I'll come with you'. A lot of people find it weird that I'd actually rather go alone.
@@TheLadyDelirium yeah, its definitely outside the comfort zone but i think a lot of people will be pleasantly surprised once they try it. There's more freedom as a solo traveler.
@@JjBianca it was really funny in a way. Was at a nice restaurant in Sweden, there was a couple next to me. The girl was eyeing the champagne eargerly but her boyfriend was clearly not ordering. So I waved at the waiter, got a whole bottle and drank it like freedom and independence :D
I love travelling alone. No mind-boiling discussions "let's see this museum" "no, let's go see the city walls before it rains" or whatever - I can even sit on my ass a whole trip watching birds on a square and it's adorably nobody's business. Funny cause my crush feels the same. We should go together and only meet in the evening to talk about our day. Or not. :)
@Bröther May I Have Some Lööps also the infj personality may be to blame for it. I am infj too. We tend to fall in love desperately and we are clingy, take rejections too personally, blame ourselves that we are not good enough for the significant other and we should have done more as we seek the confirmation of our value in other people. We try to get back together very hard, partially because we dont like changes. It takes a loooooong time to fall out of love, even though we know all the logical reasons why it is wrong to love this peron. We still hope we are destined for each other and see ourselves as the saviours of the person, that only we can make them better cause we see their potential. And when we finally forget about them, we just realize relationships are far too risky and uncertain and it's not worth going through all of this again for somebody else who will most likely reject us at some point anyway. It is just safer to stay single.
@@martinajurickova5750 I have not felt that identified with a description of my love life, it sucks to go slower on moving on after being in a relationship that is currently very hard and I feel like going back to therapy because of this difficutly. I envy the people that can move on and heal so easily :c
*goes on a date with myself, excuses self to the bathroom, calls Uber, leaves out the backdoor, blocks me on social media on the drive home, goes to sleep*
Single INFJ here. I’ve been taking myself out for a weekly date for years now. It started when I moved across the country and didn’t have one friend.At first I was a nervous wreck. But it got more comfortable. I sit at the bar. After awhile I started to get to know local people in the city I live in. Now we run into each other all the time. And we laugh. What was unexpected now is that when I sit down by myself and I don’t know anyone, strangers seem to want to strike up a conversation. This didn’t happen in the beginning but I guess I’ve made myself more comfortable going out on a solo date night 😁 And yikes! Sometimes I even initiate the conversation 😬
I enjoy going out by myself I sit at the bar, write poetry and I am very content chilling by myself. I get very annoyed when some guy tries to talk to me. I also love dressing up. I don't dress up for men I dress up to see my reflection in the mirror or the window as I walk by. Been self partner for 10 years.
ENFP falls in love with everyone she meets, but after 30 minutes can't stand any of them. Well, except for INFJs but the only male INFJs are online or people who have mistyped themselves. Solution to the restaurant problem: Order take out, pick it up, find most beautiful scenic spot, and eat your dinner to your favorite dinner playlist = bliss. No one talking, beautiful view, wonderful food, and lovely music.
If two self-partnered people are eating lunch together, it's called a double date. Waiter: 'just the two of you?are you waiting for someone?' Them: what do you mean? we are four people. bring us four pasta and four glasses of wine.
One of the most attractive single males on CZcams has to take himself on a date? WTF so I guess the rest of us might as well get a bunch of cats and eat frosting out of cans?!
I also self partner, & take myself to concerts & dinner. I dont feel awkward until someone says : "Are you by yourself? " Yea. "Oh,.....well....good for you!" As if I just tied my shoes for the first time.🙄
I’m married and I’ve had this same breakthrough myself. I’ve gone alone to a concert & a few standup shows (I love em) this year. And it’s refreshing to be relieved of the disappointment of wanting to discuss the performance afterwards but the other person you went with doesn’t care as deeply as you do. So I, my friend, am also self-partnered in life.
In Japan, there are restaurants designed for people who come by themselves. Single tables are totally blocked off from others. Some to an extend that you won't see anyone. You won't even see the servers. They bring you dishes through a hole on the wall of the cubicles.
Love this! I took myself on a whole 3 day vacation last week just to prove to myself that it’s okay to go places and do things by myself. It was a great time.
INFP here. I love being self-partnered. I’ve taken many an overseas trip alone. Sometimes it feels uncomfortable when you’re by yourself but it’s truly been the greatest thing I’ve ever done for my soul. I also kinda like that it probably makes people uncomfortable on some level haha
Natty B aww-yes! I don’t really watch movies so I rarely know people.... but I watched some of a Vogue interview with her and she seems like such an incredible soul and heart. I love it and I really could see our good friend, Frank James and Emma being.... at min... good friends. I’ve tried picturing what kind of woman I could see with FJ... and it was challenging (because he’s so deep and Uber cool, etc.).... but Emma Watson seems exactly the type. 🌟🙏☺️
Banal, self-consciousness, the gun behind the toilet, eavesdropping, good old Hermione and self-partnering, you hit every point that made me laugh. I hope you have a great Thanksgiving brother.
Same. Inner rage is real when hearing others conversations and what's important to them. At the same time the other side of the coin is that they are entitled to those opinions and feelings. An introverted mind tends to see the world as complex, tends not to have the capacity to perceive so much as well as worry about the 'superficial'.... part of me does envy those people however, that can find joy in a 2D existence.
Clare Worrell Reminds me of a line from MR. ROBOT (Eps3.1undo.gz) Elliot: "...join in on the live-action cartoon of 2D emotions that everyone else is in. I finally see the fatal exception error of my ways...”
Dude, exactly this! I’ve never read something that describes this feeling so well. On one hand I feel disinterested in common conversations people have because they just seem so superficial, unimportant, and flat. But at the same time, everyone has the right to choose what’s important to them and who am I to judge that and tell them to talk about something more dynamic?
Frank, don't be self conscious. Remember that you are an INFJ and that INFJ's never engage in banal conversation. We are always deep and interesting, but never more so when we are on a date with ourself.
ENFP here: I'm completely fine with eating alone at a restaurant! I used to do it all the time in middle school and high school when I didn't have anyone else to go with :) Little tip: you don't have to be self-conscious of ppl looking at you! Most people really don't care 🤷♀️
ENFP here too. I always get that table for two alone so I DON'T get that offer to go kill a dragon. Though sometimes I still do. Do you find that some people will come up to your table to "keep you company"?
I care about myself by sitting alone on a park bench watching small animals and ppl going by. Sometimes I inconvenience myself to meet other ppl at bars, sometimes i inconvenience them to come join me on my bench.. It's all about balance.. Lol
6:00 Love that kind of humor 😂 my death jokes slip out sometimes too On a serious note, I understand what you mean. I also always wanted to take myself on a date because I got to this point in my life where I want to have a good time on my own, I’m not saying my friends aren’t fun, but I just wanted to experience what it was like to go out on your own. I went to the beach by myself, at first, I was also kinda scared I would stand out and people would judge me or something but I’m glad i did it, it takes a few times to get comfortable with it. & about listening to other conversations, I did that too and man it’s triggering lol superficial conversations are overrated
As a single INFJ I've been taking myself on weekly dates starting when I was a very shy teenager and again after I left a long term relationship. At first it felt weird and like I didn't belong, but began to get comfortable and now absolutely love it! It's always a new adventure, I never know who I might meet. Sometimes I meet no one, other times I'll end up having the most brilliant conversations with some very interesting people. I love taking myself to the movies, dancing, dinner and to see bands. I get dressed up just as if I were going on a date with someone else. I find that other people are more likely to strike up a conversation with me when Im on these self dates than if I go out with friends. I often prefer my self dates than with going out with friends. I get to choose my own adventure, instead of having to compromise with someone else's wishes. I met my recent boyfriend by just sitting at the bar alone. So...I always treat it as an adventure and let the universe be in control.
Your description of walking in somewhere by yourself and feeling like you’ll be told to get lost = my thoughts and feelings exactly when I’m going somewhere by myself. Your videos really resonate with me, fellow INFJ. Thank you for making them! Go Nats!
This is actually so relatable, like restaurants should have a special single's table for people who are "self partnered" , where we can have privacy and don't have to feel as if we don't belong there.
You know why I love your channel Frank? You make Me laough and contemplate at the same time . Thanx for everything you put out there my friend, I really appreciate it 💞
Eavesdropping on someone without him ever noticing while acting like we are paying attention to some other activities is also secretly an INFJ superpower
That skyrim part got me ahaha that "You're not supposed to be here" feeling, I always felt like that whenever I go at a fastfood by myself. Bookstores are always a safe haven!
ENFP here. I love going out by myself! 😆 I especially enjoy going shopping and watching movies alone cuz I don't have to care about everyone's opinion. If I have my friends with me, I will have to make sure that they are happy about what we're buying or watching, so things could get exhausting. But, if I'm by myself, Yay freedom! 🎉 I can be spontaneous without causing trouble for others.
Dear Frank, I used to be a waitress and never have I cared that someone asked for a table for 1. If you want to take yourself out on a date then just do it. Sincerely, A Blunt INTJ
Your channel is blowing up! Congrats on 150K subs FJ! :) Now on to the video's subject....I have taken myself on sooo many "dates" (even to nice places with the white linen tablecloths and fine crystal wineglasses), trips (from cross country road trips to Jeju Island in South Korea). Most recently, I took myself to one of those theaters where you can get a full dinner and alcoholic beverages while watching a movie. I even upped my attire a bit for it. While it has all been nice, it gets pretty old after a while. The fancier the place the lonelier it feels. I have cut back on all of that solo adventure stuff (partly for financial reasons but even if I had "big bucks" I think I am kind of done with that). While being with the wrong person on a date or a trip can make it worse than going alone, going with the right person makes it sooo much better. I look forward to adventures and dates with the right person. :)
Frank, take me to church! I love your message of taking yourself on a date even if you're not single. I'm married (INFJ/INTJ) and we have lots of alone time to care for ourselves even though we adore each other. It allows us to bring our best selves to the table when we feel like we are taken care of. Intj date: video games. Infj date: go to the park.
It's difficult to live in this society as an introvert, let alone an intuitive. You can't even get yourself on a date without getting criticized by others who watch you being without company. They think you are depressed or you have some kind of psychological problem while you might be relaxed and thinking without having anybody to disturb you.
Frank: Even though a lot of this video was quite sarcastic *breaks a laugh* there is a sincere heart to it. That’s basically my channel, I’m very sarcastic on the surface but I’m very sincere. I’m one of the most sincere people you’ll ever meet. Me: You act like we don’t love you already, Frank...
:-) As a married INTJ, I force myself to go out to eat by myself, walk the mall alone, and talk to strangers at the grocery store. I call this my self imposed therapy. While it goes against the way I feel, it does build my ability to socialize in those social situations I have to attend.
This storytime style really agrees with your being. :D I'm just trying to say listening to you is cool. And I appreciate all the video game metaphors. Life makes more sense that way, man.
Famous Manhattan restauranteur Danny Meyer, to prep for design and inspiration for his first restaurant, traveled Europe and ate alone at tons of restaurants and this is how he feels about single diners:. that it's the ultimate compliment because the lone customer can go anywhere and they chose the place they did because that's where they wanted to go - they didn't have to negotiate and compromise with anyone else and end up at their fifth or sixth choice or no choice of theirs at all. The choice is purely to please themself and no one else.
Frank my tip for going places is always take a book. Observe in a confident manner and read as if totally absorbed, stay as long as you like and stay cool and attractive. Love you Frank xxx
I'm curious what this banal conversation consisted of, and what intriguing and magical content FJ's conversations would entail... Can we get a video on FJ conversational advice? A podcast? A livestream?!
1/Well this explains a few things. I was hiding my guns IN the toilet. Thanks for the tip. 2/We INFJs can go back and forth between "self partnering" and yearning for a relationship (or if in one, wanting more, more, more), which can account for the intermittent bouts of self-imposed misery. Romantic idealism is exhausting. 3/Your videos color outside INFJ lines without blurring the integrity of the portrait, and ain't that what self-development is all about? 4/Forget coffee houses, museums and bars. You don't shop for diamonds in a shoe store. A tip for you: try under highway overpasses, coed drum circles, Post Office wanted posters, guided urban sewer tours. You're welcome!
I wouldn't have thought he was desperate enough to "self partner", I really assumed he had a lot of success with women. Cuz like, he's very attractive?
Love that dark Ni humor!😅 I'm trying out this whole self-partner thing too, and let me tell you as an extrovert, it is a challenge! I think as an Fe user, being alone can be feel so lonely, but learning to love our own company is immensely important and valuable; so kudos on creating a solid foundation for a successful future relationship!😎
I never heard it articulated so perfectly until now; liking dates but really, primarily, just to be able to go places. I too am self partnered and also also this vid was hilarious and FJ is hella kewt and I love him.
Thanks for watching 😉
Subscribe to be the godfather tonight 👉 bit.ly/frankjames
Frank, FYI, I also got throat issue in recent 2 weeks, so I stopped drinking ice/cold drink. I always drink warm water and it helps.
I just want to say ;you have helped me out so much in my life. Thankyou so very much. May God bless you and yours.
I want to give you a hug, as an INFP who is also single but refuse to call myself self-partnered yet. Thanks for being sincere always. I wish I could meet someone like you gosh darn it. But so I was looking forward to taking me to this korean buffet-type restaurant but the minimum number of people per table is two. I don’t think they’ll take self-partnered as an explanation either.
Frank James maybe I’ll try it..... I don’t usually like going out by myself so I guess I don’t ever go out. But I also don’t really like going out in groups that much or with people where there’s not even at least a slight romantic interest.... just seems more fun if there is.... but I do not know or meet any people in which there is a slight romantic interest..... so yet again, another reason why I never go out. I don’t know.... I slightly feel depressed now. Lol
There was another commenter that mentioned a Korean BBQ place.... and now I also want Korean BBQ. lol
I have started going out one-on-one with different business prospects.... and since I know the conversation is going to be about me learning about them and what they do.... me likely helping them with ideas, etc.... those are pretty fun. Oh wait... this is supposed to be about me going out by myself. Ughhhhh.... okay.... maybe I’ll try it. If I do.... I’ll let you know how it goes. 🙏🌟☺️
I love the chill, talking, spill-your-thoughts vids like this. It’s reminds me of some of your older content. I like the new stuff too, but these are definitely my favorite :)
The best thing about self-partnering is that you can be late for every date.
And you're always on time
I know you are both just having fun but still your comments made me realize that when I allow myself to slow down and be *in* *the* *moment* , I can accomplish so much more - rather than trying to please someone else who doesn't truly get such things. I am married to someone who is loud and negative and anxious and very *surface* in conversations etc and it is mentally and physically exhausting.
You're missing out on arriving early and wondering where you are for half an hour
A wizard is never late, Frodo Baggins.
I really missed your chilly talking videos. Don’t get me wrong I like the typology videos as well but I don’t know.. just listening to your thoughts is something I really enjoy
This comment should be the topcomment to remind Frank what we are here for!
M IJ AGREE
Yah definitely! I hope he does more of these personal videos again
I'm glad to know you enjoy these! I like making them!
Completely!
i like going out alone just to hear other people's conversations. it's like doing a field study- humans in their natural habitat. :-)
retrogradepink yes and people watching :)
Hahaha YES!
True
Oh, yes, people-watching (let's be real... _analyzing_ ) is the best part of self-dating.
Dude, for real, today I sat next to a guy talking to his pastor (preacher) about his existential crisis. IT WAS EPIC
Travelled alone in Europe, ate at lots of nice restaurants. The experience was surprisingly enjoyable. Bought myself truffle and champagne.
Sounds amazing, I'm almost jealous 😂🤣🥂
I've been recently telling people that I'd like to go on holiday myself. The usual response is 'I'll come with you'. A lot of people find it weird that I'd actually rather go alone.
@@TheLadyDelirium yeah, its definitely outside the comfort zone but i think a lot of people will be pleasantly surprised once they try it. There's more freedom as a solo traveler.
@@JjBianca it was really funny in a way. Was at a nice restaurant in Sweden, there was a couple next to me. The girl was eyeing the champagne eargerly but her boyfriend was clearly not ordering. So I waved at the waiter, got a whole bottle and drank it like freedom and independence :D
I love travelling alone. No mind-boiling discussions "let's see this museum" "no, let's go see the city walls before it rains" or whatever - I can even sit on my ass a whole trip watching birds on a square and it's adorably nobody's business. Funny cause my crush feels the same. We should go together and only meet in the evening to talk about our day. Or not. :)
CZcams: Unverifies Frank James' channel
Frank James: I'm self-partnered now.
DuncanDeez
Hahaha. Love it.
You had me at ‘self-partnered’, you lost me at “I like going places”.
PS: please can you begin every video with “What’s up my frisky ponies”? Mama likes that.
Ha ha haaa, introvert issues.
LOL
I cant believe FJ doesnt have a partner.... he is a gem
@Bröther May I Have Some Lööps also the infj personality may be to blame for it. I am infj too. We tend to fall in love desperately and we are clingy, take rejections too personally, blame ourselves that we are not good enough for the significant other and we should have done more as we seek the confirmation of our value in other people. We try to get back together very hard, partially because we dont like changes. It takes a loooooong time to fall out of love, even though we know all the logical reasons why it is wrong to love this peron. We still hope we are destined for each other and see ourselves as the saviours of the person, that only we can make them better cause we see their potential. And when we finally forget about them, we just realize relationships are far too risky and uncertain and it's not worth going through all of this again for somebody else who will most likely reject us at some point anyway. It is just safer to stay single.
@@martinajurickova5750 I have not felt that identified with a description of my love life, it sucks to go slower on moving on after being in a relationship that is currently very hard and I feel like going back to therapy because of this difficutly. I envy the people that can move on and heal so easily :c
Something beyond a gem
*goes on a date with myself, excuses self to the bathroom, calls Uber, leaves out the backdoor, blocks me on social media on the drive home, goes to sleep*
‘Or, at the very least, the bar tender will be like “here’s a quest to go kill a dragon”’
If only life would be awesome for once. Instead of repeated nothingness everyday 🙌.
@@Neroskully but if there we quests to kill dragons, that would be our "repeated nothingness"...!!! 🤯
Just like in Skyrim
Single INFJ here. I’ve been taking myself out for a weekly date for years now. It started when I moved across the country and didn’t have one friend.At first I was a nervous wreck. But it got more comfortable. I sit at the bar. After awhile I started to get to know local people in the city I live in. Now we run into each other all the time. And we laugh. What was unexpected now is that when I sit down by myself and I don’t know anyone, strangers seem to want to strike up a conversation. This didn’t happen in the beginning but I guess I’ve made myself more comfortable going out on a solo date night 😁 And yikes! Sometimes I even initiate the conversation 😬
LinYouToo i do the same thing! I haven't gotten a chance to see any repeats though so I'm slightly envious lol
I enjoy going out by myself I sit at the bar, write poetry and I am very content chilling by myself. I get very annoyed when some guy tries to talk to me. I also love dressing up. I don't dress up for men I dress up to see my reflection in the mirror or the window as I walk by. Been self partner for 10 years.
FJ: feels self-partnered and dates himself
INTP: feels confused and sexually assaulted by the idea of falling in love
ENFP falls in love with everyone she meets, but after 30 minutes can't stand any of them. Well, except for INFJs but the only male INFJs are online or people who have mistyped themselves. Solution to the restaurant problem: Order take out, pick it up, find most beautiful scenic spot, and eat your dinner to your favorite dinner playlist = bliss. No one talking, beautiful view, wonderful food, and lovely music.
prntrfxr as far as I know, you can't meet an infj in person unless theyre forced to be around you.
w h i t e n o i s e You can if you learn body language then systematize questions to identify them
@@prntrfxr Try any female infjs? I take myself out like that 😍
Skimmerlit that sounds like some shit an infj would be terrified of
i just watched the weirdest 8 minutes of stand up comedy
Lol. It was very entertaining.
Welcome to the channel! We hope you stay a while!
But it was a sit down conversation, wasn't it? 🤣
If two self-partnered people are eating lunch together, it's called a double date.
Waiter: 'just the two of you?are you waiting for someone?'
Them: what do you mean? we are four people. bring us four pasta and four glasses of wine.
Thanks! I needed a new way to justify eating all the pasta!
best comment ever💯😂
One of the most attractive single males on CZcams has to take himself on a date? WTF so I guess the rest of us might as well get a bunch of cats and eat frosting out of cans?!
Timmy Twister 😂
Lol
Does self-partnering always involve cats? #RIPDarylMyCat
As an INFP, my main goal in life is to give myself one long continuous spa day
Haha Fellow INFP here. Just showed up to say that I pretty much use the phrase "spa day" on the daily. I think that means we're INFPing right. 😏👍
@@bellyfulochelly4222 No reason spa day shouldn't be every day!
...in bed! 💤
😂😂🥰
I'd take you out Frank, we could be awkward together
Right? He's so funny.
Me (INFP): I wanna go on a date with someone... but do I really have to?
I also self partner, & take myself to concerts & dinner. I dont feel awkward until someone says :
"Are you by yourself? "
Yea.
"Oh,.....well....good for you!"
As if I just tied my shoes for the first time.🙄
Just say "I'm here with my best friend".
In the middle of the video I was like mannnnn what a great friendship we could have 😂😂 Infp here .
Infp hereeeee
Same
Yes
Intj here
I’m married and I’ve had this same breakthrough myself. I’ve gone alone to a concert & a few standup shows (I love em) this year. And it’s refreshing to be relieved of the disappointment of wanting to discuss the performance afterwards but the other person you went with doesn’t care as deeply as you do. So I, my friend, am also self-partnered in life.
I have come to embrace my self partnership, no drama and I get to do what I want
*sets mirror down across the table set for two. Roommate walks in*
Roomate: "Uh. What are you doing?"
Me: "Do you mind? I'm clearly on a date!"
😂😂😂😂😂😂
One could say that I am in a complicated love triangle between me, myself, and my husband.
@Natalie Womack No wonder I feel constantly drained.
"Why don't you love me like I love myself?! Damnit, she gets it!" 😂
@Natalie Womack I try... ☺️
@@taylorjade6918 😂
"I would go the the bathroom where I had hidden my gun beforehand and end it all". I love dramatic Frank James. Haha!
I'm loving this,,, I feel more connected to myself than with anybody else. Being older I've accepted this and being more fearless helps.
I saved this video to my “when you’re having a bad day” playlist
Brooke Estes I have one of those playlists too 🙂
Great idea!!
In Japan, there are restaurants designed for people who come by themselves. Single tables are totally blocked off from others. Some to an extend that you won't see anyone. You won't even see the servers. They bring you dishes through a hole on the wall of the cubicles.
You have such a dark sense of humor... it appeases my soul.
My ideal imagination now is a Café filled with self partnered dates 😜
Should be a new business venture ... :-)) exclusive place for self partnered dates
That's right, who needs a date. I always have the best conversations with the voices in my head.
How much ice do you want?
FJ: yes
"I took myself on a date"
INFP's: First time?
My usual selfdate is going to a coffeeshop and enjoying my favorite cup of coffee taking my time.. It relaxes me..
Jenni H, thank you.. I’ll try this myself ☺️
Love this! I took myself on a whole 3 day vacation last week just to prove to myself that it’s okay to go places and do things by myself. It was a great time.
INFP here. I love being self-partnered. I’ve taken many an overseas trip alone. Sometimes it feels uncomfortable when you’re by yourself but it’s truly been the greatest thing I’ve ever done for my soul. I also kinda like that it probably makes people uncomfortable on some level haha
Aww.... I can definitely picture you and Emma Watson.... ya’ll would make a very cool and attractive couple. 🙏🌟😊
I love Emma Watson. Great personality, great actor, great activist.
Natty B aww-yes! I don’t really watch movies so I rarely know people.... but I watched some of a Vogue interview with her and she seems like such an incredible soul and heart. I love it and I really could see our good friend, Frank James and Emma being.... at min... good friends. I’ve tried picturing what kind of woman I could see with FJ... and it was challenging (because he’s so deep and Uber cool, etc.).... but Emma Watson seems exactly the type. 🌟🙏☺️
Banal, self-consciousness, the gun behind the toilet, eavesdropping, good old Hermione and self-partnering, you hit every point that made me laugh. I hope you have a great Thanksgiving brother.
Does sitting in bed eating a whole bag of Bin Bin rice crackers while binging the first 3 episodes of the Mandelorian count as a date?
Probably
Hey Netflix and chill is legit (well Disney+ technically, but you get the idea)
Same. Inner rage is real when hearing others conversations and what's important to them. At the same time the other side of the coin is that they are entitled to those opinions and feelings. An introverted mind tends to see the world as complex, tends not to have the capacity to perceive so much as well as worry about the 'superficial'.... part of me does envy those people however, that can find joy in a 2D existence.
Clare Worrell Reminds me of a line from MR. ROBOT (Eps3.1undo.gz)
Elliot:
"...join in on the live-action cartoon of 2D emotions that everyone else is in. I finally see the fatal exception error of my ways...”
Never seen it :) maybe introverts are like borgs, we are in a collective all thinking the same thing in secret haha
Dude, exactly this! I’ve never read something that describes this feeling so well. On one hand I feel disinterested in common conversations people have because they just seem so superficial, unimportant, and flat. But at the same time, everyone has the right to choose what’s important to them and who am I to judge that and tell them to talk about something more dynamic?
One of the reasons I went for a therapy was to become normal (2D) person. My therapist cannot help me. (Infp here)
"They're trying to partner with other people...What a silly thing to do!" My INTJ-T self : IKR ?? EWWW
Man I think the same way
as an aromantic INTJ-T
ew x1000
I agree with that. You have to love yourself first.
You only haven't met the right one yet.
True. But I would add. You have to love yourself period. Even after you’ve found your life partner
@@fluffyclouds555 that is very true 👍
💚 I’ve always been able to go out by myself. I love that about myself. Do what you like and don’t worry about what others think.
Because single good looking men bring down the ambience of any venue 😂 Yeah you should stay away
Good point hahaha 👍😊
Thaaaat's why, they're never in public 😂
I think you need more ice cubes. 12 isn’t enough.
Hayley 😂
This is, by far, my favorite FJ video 💯
Frank, don't be self conscious. Remember that you are an INFJ and that INFJ's never engage in banal conversation. We are always deep and interesting, but never more so when we are on a date with ourself.
Lmao.🍀
I love this guy. I feel like he’d fit in my family. He’s so random and reflective plus video games. 👌
Thank you so much for your vulnerability Frank.
ENFP here: I'm completely fine with eating alone at a restaurant! I used to do it all the time in middle school and high school when I didn't have anyone else to go with :)
Little tip: you don't have to be self-conscious of ppl looking at you! Most people really don't care 🤷♀️
ENFP here too. I always get that table for two alone so I DON'T get that offer to go kill a dragon. Though sometimes I still do. Do you find that some people will come up to your table to "keep you company"?
I care about myself by sitting alone on a park bench watching small animals and ppl going by. Sometimes I inconvenience myself to meet other ppl at bars, sometimes i inconvenience them to come join me on my bench.. It's all about balance.. Lol
Dodir Anđela - Intuitivno Otvaranje yes :)
That's some swag confidence you got going on there, Franki boi! Keep it up!
6:00 Love that kind of humor 😂 my death jokes slip out sometimes too
On a serious note, I understand what you mean. I also always wanted to take myself on a date because I got to this point in my life where I want to have a good time on my own, I’m not saying my friends aren’t fun, but I just wanted to experience what it was like to go out on your own. I went to the beach by myself, at first, I was also kinda scared I would stand out and people would judge me or something but I’m glad i did it, it takes a few times to get comfortable with it. & about listening to other conversations, I did that too and man it’s triggering lol superficial conversations are overrated
As a single INFJ I've been taking myself on weekly dates starting when I was a very shy teenager and again after I left a long term relationship. At first it felt weird and like I didn't belong, but began to get comfortable and now absolutely love it! It's always a new adventure, I never know who I might meet. Sometimes I meet no one, other times I'll end up having the most brilliant conversations with some very interesting people. I love taking myself to the movies, dancing, dinner and to see bands. I get dressed up just as if I were going on a date with someone else. I find that other people are more likely to strike up a conversation with me when Im on these self dates than if I go out with friends. I often prefer my self dates than with going out with friends. I get to choose my own adventure, instead of having to compromise with someone else's wishes. I met my recent boyfriend by just sitting at the bar alone. So...I always treat it as an adventure and let the universe be in control.
this is the definition of self love
you will enjoy self partnering! Been living that way for several years now. You go guy!!
Your description of walking in somewhere by yourself and feeling like you’ll be told to get lost = my thoughts and feelings exactly when I’m going somewhere by myself.
Your videos really resonate with me, fellow INFJ. Thank you for making them!
Go Nats!
Frank is cute fam. Not just his looks, but the way he does his awkward pauses and facial expressions. Girls be blind sometimes man, I swear..
I've been dating myself for about 25 years. I guess I'm polyamorous, since I also occasionally let others date me too. *From an INTJ/INFJ*
Yes! I also always expect a quest when I go places by myself!
This is actually so relatable, like restaurants should have a special single's table for people who are "self partnered" , where we can have privacy and don't have to feel as if we don't belong there.
@@i.b.640 that is actually a really deep comment!
I've been self partnered for a decade now;
And I'm glad it's no longer called being a miserable loner...
And by the way FJ, it's very nice to have you back on this kind of video.
You know why I love your channel Frank?
You make Me laough and contemplate at the same time .
Thanx for everything you put out there my friend, I really appreciate it 💞
You are being philosophical and relatable again! ✨
Eavesdropping on someone without him ever noticing while acting like we are paying attention to some other activities is also secretly an INFJ superpower
That skyrim part got me ahaha that "You're not supposed to be here" feeling, I always felt like that whenever I go at a fastfood by myself. Bookstores are always a safe haven!
ENFP here. I love going out by myself! 😆 I especially enjoy going shopping and watching movies alone cuz I don't have to care about everyone's opinion. If I have my friends with me, I will have to make sure that they are happy about what we're buying or watching, so things could get exhausting. But, if I'm by myself, Yay freedom! 🎉 I can be spontaneous without causing trouble for others.
Sincere sarcasm is my favorite kind.
Dear Frank,
I used to be a waitress and never have I cared that someone asked for a table for 1. If you want to take yourself out on a date then just do it.
Sincerely,
A Blunt INTJ
next time my grandparents ask me why I still haven't found anyone I'll just tell them I'm self-partnered
Your channel is blowing up! Congrats on 150K subs FJ! :)
Now on to the video's subject....I have taken myself on sooo many "dates" (even to nice places with the white linen tablecloths and fine crystal wineglasses), trips (from cross country road trips to Jeju Island in South Korea). Most recently, I took myself to one of those theaters where you can get a full dinner and alcoholic beverages while watching a movie. I even upped my attire a bit for it.
While it has all been nice, it gets pretty old after a while. The fancier the place the lonelier it feels. I have cut back on all of that solo adventure stuff (partly for financial reasons but even if I had "big bucks" I think I am kind of done with that).
While being with the wrong person on a date or a trip can make it worse than going alone, going with the right person makes it sooo much better. I look forward to adventures and dates with the right person. :)
I like how his voice is rekt and he has no idea why but he's holding a drink full of ice to the brim
I lowkey like your voice more like this lol.
I like to go on dates by myself too, especially art galleries, I love to study paintings and sculptures.
Finally a sit and talk video
Frank, take me to church! I love your message of taking yourself on a date even if you're not single. I'm married (INFJ/INTJ) and we have lots of alone time to care for ourselves even though we adore each other. It allows us to bring our best selves to the table when we feel like we are taken care of. Intj date: video games. Infj date: go to the park.
In all of those 16 personalities videos, everything happens so suddenly. This one is almost like ASMR. Amazing.
It's difficult to live in this society as an introvert, let alone an intuitive. You can't even get yourself on a date without getting criticized by others who watch you being without company. They think you are depressed or you have some kind of psychological problem while you might be relaxed and thinking without having anybody to disturb you.
Love your videos, you crack me up 😂
Maura Daly me2 LOL 😆😅
A quest, I love it. Often have the same thought patterns when I take myself out on dates. Thank you Frank for making this one
I relate very much to Your way of talking. Sarcastic yet sincere ..
Nada Nadi I’m the same way
I hope after this sarcastic but very sincere in heart talk, Hermione did contact you.
Frank: Even though a lot of this video was quite sarcastic *breaks a laugh* there is a sincere heart to it. That’s basically my channel, I’m very sarcastic on the surface but I’m very sincere. I’m one of the most sincere people you’ll ever meet.
Me: You act like we don’t love you already, Frank...
This is really funny and absolutely true self partnering. that's a good one you can't blame anybody else but yourself.. that's how you learn..
:-) As a married INTJ, I force myself to go out to eat by myself, walk the mall alone, and talk to strangers at the grocery store. I call this my self imposed therapy. While it goes against the way I feel, it does build my ability to socialize in those social situations I have to attend.
This storytime style really agrees with your being. :D I'm just trying to say listening to you is cool. And I appreciate all the video game metaphors. Life makes more sense that way, man.
If I ever see FJ in public, I'm 100% inviting him to go on a quest.
Famous Manhattan restauranteur Danny Meyer, to prep for design and inspiration for his first restaurant, traveled Europe and ate alone at tons of restaurants and this is how he feels about single diners:. that it's the ultimate compliment because the lone customer can go anywhere and they chose the place they did because that's where they wanted to go - they didn't have to negotiate and compromise with anyone else and end up at their fifth or sixth choice or no choice of theirs at all. The choice is purely to please themself and no one else.
"I like dating just because I like going places - I like the destination". 100% me!
I understand that feeling of not being allowed to be somewhere with the NPCs.
Yes it is called being anywhere :) well, almost... :)
Is the NPC outside or inside?
The idea of telling myself I'm self partnered makes me feel like I'm still trapped in commitment.
That is an ISFP comment lol!
Frank my tip for going places is always take a book. Observe in a confident manner and read as if totally absorbed, stay as long as you like and stay cool and attractive. Love you Frank xxx
I'm curious what this banal conversation consisted of, and what intriguing and magical content FJ's conversations would entail... Can we get a video on FJ conversational advice? A podcast? A livestream?!
1/Well this explains a few things. I was hiding my guns IN the toilet. Thanks for the tip.
2/We INFJs can go back and forth between "self partnering" and yearning for a relationship (or if in one, wanting more, more, more), which can account for the intermittent bouts of self-imposed misery. Romantic idealism is exhausting.
3/Your videos color outside INFJ lines without blurring the integrity of the portrait, and ain't that what self-development is all about?
4/Forget coffee houses, museums and bars. You don't shop for diamonds in a shoe store. A tip for you: try under highway overpasses, coed drum circles, Post Office wanted posters, guided urban sewer tours. You're welcome!
I wouldn't have thought he was desperate enough to "self partner", I really assumed he had a lot of success
with women. Cuz like, he's very attractive?
When Frank smiles its amazing! ❤
I loved this talk. Been needing to gussy up and go out with myself for a while now. Thanks for the reminder!
Love that dark Ni humor!😅 I'm trying out this whole self-partner thing too, and let me tell you as an extrovert, it is a challenge! I think as an Fe user, being alone can be feel so lonely, but learning to love our own company is immensely important and valuable; so kudos on creating a solid foundation for a successful future relationship!😎
Frank James' Word of the Day: Banal
I never heard it articulated so perfectly until now; liking dates but really, primarily, just to be able to go places. I too am self partnered and also also this vid was hilarious and FJ is hella kewt and I love him.