I think this aspect of ourselves has the greatest potential for growth. Letting go of control is essentially letting go of identifying with rigid beliefs, assumptions, ideas, perceptions and judgements. It's the mind that refuses to let go of itself. The mind will always seek to justify itself, its beliefs and to "solidify" its existence. It is in the nature of the mind to resist impermanence and create the illusion of stability by holding onto fixed ideas. This is possibly the root of all human suffering: the mind trying to qualify, contain and define energy. And energy is motion. It is change. Everything is.
Finally, in this video [Huge Respect & Gratitude to you both] I've gotten my Answer... When I was aprox 7-8 y.o. I was contemplating "How do people Grow in a relationship? Do they evolve at the same rate?" Because it seemed to me that growth was stunted in marriages and to stay you had to sacrifice personal spiritual growth. I couldn't figure out how Both people grew at the same level at the same time in a relationship.
I was babying an iron man not knowing I was adding fuel to his fire thinking that he was an narcissist,he is condition to be dismissive. So now I understand the coldness after I walk away. 😊
I had been with an iron man, then right after a copper man (i needed more softness and creativity opposed to the black and white rigidity and limitations of the iron). Now I'm looking forward to learning about the steel man to understand who I'm currently with 😊
Thanks for another good advice video. Pity you don't discuss about a man having a mix of those three types! And isn't there other types, like peuter, nickel, crome, silver gold or platinum? ! 😊 😅 A mix of the three you named does exist, I think. As well as woman have the those types. The percentages and phase of life makes the variations. The iron man I was with, was the way you described. But, very unfair. Because I did more than all his Rules!! Not submissive, I truly enjoyed to be a housewife. And I was the perfect housewife, and more !! A Gold and platinum wife!! 😅 In every way, I did my best to please him, and it was easy for me. But, besides that I'm also highly spiritual. Which he did acknowledge a lot. He did see my efforts, was thankful, and such, but sought trouble nearly every day. He didn't make me feel secure at all, more like walking on shedded glass! In fact, on the outside he was iron, inside more copper. Couldn't really support us, nor contain me. On the contrary, he would want to make me very cross, which goes against my nature!! He wasn't creative though, very rigid, and such. He sought for 'faults', that didn't exist!! No harmony at all. Only hunting for trouble. Hunting, is the right word. He wanted a bait, I wouldn't give into that shit. That horrible behaviour of his made life terrible for me. I was so kind and loving towards him. Too long. Awful. At a point I had to defend myself, with all of the might I could. I got so confused, felt frustrated to the rim, and eventually got very ill physically. It was extreemly difficult to separate, we had built a lot... I'm better off without him. Eventhough I had invested so much love, time, money and energy... My peace, is Gold! And yes, my Divine Self is the most important thing in my life. I had to understand this more deeply, maybe. I put that man, like I had done others, as a priority. But a man should be No 4 !! Berthanya said it so well, never put a man as your priority!! Which is very hard as an empathic loving being like me. I can put my children, my man, my friends, and family all before myself!! Now, I've come to a point where I'm forced to focus on myself more than anything else!! Still a journey.. But, a man should put his woman as his priority. How does a man get to understand this, without feeling undermined ? So, what metal type man is that, I was with?? In modern language we call it a narcissistic pervert, plus at times other types mixed. And, what type would fit best to me? I would prefer the right mix! 😊 Thanks for an answer. Namaste. 🙏🌟🤍
Lately I'm questioning/challenging the 'Fundamental Desires to be in Relationships" that is the "problem". I feel easily manipulated, simply because I desire friendships, connection, relationships. Possibly I'm too ignorant to either know How to be in one, or I don't have the stamina to put up with them. Seems like most people don't care to connect, and now I'm adapting, ok, me too, I don't desire to have any form of relating either...
I admire both of your ability to stay focused with that intense traffic in the background. Im so highly sensitive its quite distracting to me. Thank you for teachings!
B4 21:12 It's pretty funny that Alarms are Also Blaring, not only within me. Yes, it is the Woman that created the man, and She needs to take responsibility...AS DOES THE FATHER!!! ( ALARMS GO OFF) HE TOO NEEDS TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY For Fathering, or the LACK there of, of HIS SONS! 😉
I had 2 iron parents that always used to fight each other because they both want to get things done their way, my solution as a child: "Rules are relative and subjective, I'll do whatever I want or what I think it's the best", because the good thing of having 2 fighting parents, is that you gotta think in your own side by yourself, and your option will be always valid because if mom didn't allow it, dad allowed it and vice-versa, that's how my brother got an Xbox, and why he used to drink monster almost every day, and that's how I managed to have icecream or cookies at breakfast, and hell, even pizza for breakfast, "dad said it's ok" *pissed off mom goes to confront my dad.
I love following this conversation and would love to continue to part 4. 🤗Where can I find part 4/4? Is it possible for someone to share the correct link with me? (It is not obvious by the video titles as I could not find a similarly titled video with 4/5, thank you so much!)
You say behind the copper man there was a mother who submitted to him, and behind the iron man same thing. I disagree. Behind men who are strong on the surface there is most often a boy who has suffered strict rules and no empathy from his mother. The boy/girl grows up resentful and angry and with his/her own new strict rules and from being a victim becomes a perpetrator. I see that in my own personal life.
I think this aspect of ourselves has the greatest potential for growth.
Letting go of control is essentially letting go of identifying with rigid beliefs, assumptions, ideas, perceptions and judgements.
It's the mind that refuses to let go of itself. The mind will always seek to justify itself, its beliefs and to "solidify" its existence.
It is in the nature of the mind to resist impermanence and create the illusion of stability by holding onto fixed ideas.
This is possibly the root of all human suffering: the mind trying to qualify, contain and define energy.
And energy is motion.
It is change.
Everything is.
Finally, in this video [Huge Respect & Gratitude to you both] I've gotten my Answer... When I was aprox 7-8 y.o. I was contemplating "How do people Grow in a relationship? Do they evolve at the same rate?" Because it seemed to me that growth was stunted in marriages and to stay you had to sacrifice personal spiritual growth. I couldn't figure out how Both people grew at the same level at the same time in a relationship.
I feel the same way.
I was babying an iron man not knowing I was adding fuel to his fire thinking that he was an narcissist,he is condition to be dismissive. So now I understand the coldness after I walk away. 😊
I had been with an iron man, then right after a copper man (i needed more softness and creativity opposed to the black and white rigidity and limitations of the iron).
Now I'm looking forward to learning about the steel man to understand who I'm currently with 😊
Thanks for another good advice video. Pity you don't discuss about a man having a mix of those three types! And isn't there other types, like peuter, nickel, crome, silver gold or platinum? ! 😊 😅
A mix of the three you named does exist, I think. As well as woman have the those types. The percentages and phase of life makes the variations.
The iron man I was with, was the way you described. But, very unfair. Because I did more than all his Rules!! Not submissive, I truly enjoyed to be a housewife. And I was the perfect housewife, and more !! A Gold and platinum wife!! 😅 In every way, I did my best to please him, and it was easy for me. But, besides that I'm also highly spiritual. Which he did acknowledge a lot. He did see my efforts, was thankful, and such, but sought trouble nearly every day. He didn't make me feel secure at all, more like walking on shedded glass! In fact, on the outside he was iron, inside more copper. Couldn't really support us, nor contain me. On the contrary, he would want to make me very cross, which goes against my nature!! He wasn't creative though, very rigid, and such. He sought for 'faults', that didn't exist!! No harmony at all. Only hunting for trouble. Hunting, is the right word. He wanted a bait, I wouldn't give into that shit. That horrible behaviour of his made life terrible for me. I was so kind and loving towards him. Too long. Awful. At a point I had to defend myself, with all of the might I could. I got so confused, felt frustrated to the rim, and eventually got very ill physically. It was extreemly difficult to separate, we had built a lot... I'm better off without him. Eventhough I had invested so much love, time, money and energy...
My peace, is Gold! And yes, my Divine Self is the most important thing in my life.
I had to understand this more deeply, maybe. I put that man, like I had done others, as a priority. But a man should be No 4 !!
Berthanya said it so well, never put a man as your priority!! Which is very hard as an empathic loving being like me. I can put my children, my man, my friends, and family all before myself!! Now, I've come to a point where I'm forced to focus on myself more than anything else!! Still a journey.. But, a man should put his woman as his priority. How does a man get to understand this, without feeling undermined ?
So, what metal type man is that, I was with?? In modern language we call it a narcissistic pervert, plus at times other types mixed.
And, what type would fit best to me? I would prefer the right mix! 😊
Thanks for an answer. Namaste. 🙏🌟🤍
such a brilliant discussion
Lately I'm questioning/challenging the 'Fundamental Desires to be in Relationships" that is the "problem". I feel easily manipulated, simply because I desire friendships, connection, relationships. Possibly I'm too ignorant to either know How to be in one, or I don't have the stamina to put up with them. Seems like most people don't care to connect, and now I'm adapting, ok, me too, I don't desire to have any form of relating either...
Brilliant 🙏❤️🕊
I admire both of your ability to stay focused with that intense traffic in the background. Im so highly sensitive its quite distracting to me. Thank you for teachings!
Our pleasure!
The iron men sounds like a joy to be with 😄
So helpful. Thank you.
You're so welcome!
youre conversations are very intriguing - would be easier to take in with better audio. Thank you for sharing
Noted!
Agree. The audio fuzz distracts from such an important discussion and valuable insights
B4 21:12 It's pretty funny that Alarms are Also Blaring, not only within me. Yes, it is the Woman that created the man, and She needs to take responsibility...AS DOES THE FATHER!!! ( ALARMS GO OFF) HE TOO NEEDS TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY For Fathering, or the LACK there of, of HIS SONS! 😉
I had 2 iron parents that always used to fight each other because they both want to get things done their way, my solution as a child: "Rules are relative and subjective, I'll do whatever I want or what I think it's the best", because the good thing of having 2 fighting parents, is that you gotta think in your own side by yourself, and your option will be always valid because if mom didn't allow it, dad allowed it and vice-versa, that's how my brother got an Xbox, and why he used to drink monster almost every day, and that's how I managed to have icecream or cookies at breakfast, and hell, even pizza for breakfast, "dad said it's ok" *pissed off mom goes to confront my dad.
thank you for sharing
I love this series-thank you. Can a man be in between two Types of Metals? For example Cooper and Iron.
keep it simple
I love following this conversation and would love to continue to part 4. 🤗Where can I find part 4/4? Is it possible for someone to share the correct link with me? (It is not obvious by the video titles as I could not find a similarly titled video with 4/5, thank you so much!)
Best is to go to the playlist in the main page, there you can find different topics as a group.
It's not in the playlist. Can you please post link here. 🙏🙏🙏
I really want to hear about the 4th steel man!
You say behind the copper man there was a mother who submitted to him, and behind the iron man same thing. I disagree. Behind men who are strong on the surface there is most often a boy who has suffered strict rules and no empathy from his mother. The boy/girl grows up resentful and angry and with his/her own new strict rules and from being a victim becomes a perpetrator. I see that in my own personal life.
Becoming iron or copper based on internal self protection?
yes, the hard heart usually protect an insecure person
But it also Shields from life and growth. Is the emotional turmoil part of forging a new self of steel?