Bitchy ASMR | Sanctimommy Interview
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- čas přidán 25. 01. 2017
- Don't watch this if you're easily triggered by roleplays featuring a sanctimonious mother (i.e., a "Sanctimommy"). You can learn more about this particular type of mother on the Sanctimommy page on Facebook: / sanctimommy .
And yes, "triggering" is an appropriate description for this video for some people. I'm not talking about those who are merely offended by stuff like this. If you've ever been shamed by a sanctimommy for something that really hurt (say, you have one child and a sanctimommy shames you for it, but you're unable to have more children, or they blast you for not breastfeeding when you couldn't because of cancer), then yes, this video could be a trigger. I'm not just talking about pearl-clutching offense.
As I said, I mainly made this for my own enjoyment. It's not meant to be taken seriously.
"My name is Harvest... That's my s p i r i t u a l name...." I can't get enough of these roleplays omfg
R P I just heard that part and snorted. Mary is the best.
R P "my earthbound name is Karen" 😂😂😂
Hilarious, I like how she was Harvest at first then was Haven at the end... the bit about telepathy was just perfect
I'm 21 and I have a 4 year old sister. The amount of unsolicited advice and judgemental looks I get from people thinking I'm her dad is incredible.
Oh Lord! I bet!
harvest keeps her children in rear facing car seats until they're 12
@@fnfbehdjkddk 🤣🤣
This is actually hysterical. Not a mother, not planning on having kids, but god DAMN if this isn't relatable. Everyone deals with this type of holier-than-thou asswipe every once in a while.
When she announced that her daughter completed her long-form tax return, I cracked up.
Cathie Morgan I'm actually in awe of her acting in this one 😂
From one Mom to another Mom...THANK YOU....this was hilarious
Lynne N. i am the 50th liker of your comment (appreciate it)
Sumaya Khanom honestly not necessary
Namaste bitches, oh my lord 😂 I love this character, will we be seeing more of her?
Nancy's left boob yes!! she should reappear from time to time
Nancy's left boob She needs to come back at a child's birthday party
Gillian Barth m
Ahh😂 I dropped my phone and it sent that I'm sorry!
Nancy's left boob lol nice name
"Once my older child saw a picture of a kid eating a hot dog and he asked me what it was and I hyperventilated and passed out" OMG that made me howl lol
For those that are watching this for the second time (like myself), and wanna skip the intro, video starts at 9:15
ColorfulConfessions Thank you
ColorfulConfessions I liked the intro
I like the intro too! But I'm here to watch the roleplay, you know? Sometimes you just wanna skip right to it.
Investigating the organic napkins 😂 this is killing me already. Also is that Ngee or HHHHHHHHngee
See her skulking around the starbucks, whispering about the non organic coffee beans in dark corners.
My favourite role play so far!!! Please keep these coming!!
No Honey, from the back of the throat, like this "HnnnnnnGee"
-"Do you mind if I sit down with you for a minute ?
- Well, um...
- Thanks."
i just gave birth today & im so excited to see this i can go to sleep happy tonight since nobody could spend the night with me because its a shared room, thank you❤
jazmin jaquez Congrats :) Quick, let's all pile in to give you three tons of unasked for advice, and look down on you for not knowing it already :) Just kidding, as a parent myself I can tell you that this video is stunningly accurate :D
Congratulations! :)
Fiobo823 yes i know this is my 2nd baby 😂 i loved this video shes the best❤
SouthernASMR Sounds thank you ❤❤
jazmin jaquez Dang it, I only had the one! That of course means that you get to look down on me :D My son is now a strapping 25 year old, but to this day I still get those looks sometimes that say when you've home birthed 17 children without Meds like I have, then perhaps you will be an adequate parent:D
*hushed whisper and side eye* that woman left and didn't order organic coffee. It's not fair trade. LMAOOOO
Would love to see more from Harvest--perhaps "How to Prepare Healthful Edamame-Arugula Butter for Your Wee Ones" or "Colon Cleanses for Kiddos".
I smile every time she uploads a "bitchy" video
oh my gosh, I love you. haha I was currently called selfish because my SO & I are trying to find someone to watch our three small children so we could have a night out for the first time since October. This was the amazing, I have been binge watching all of your videos!
you kinda look Like phoeboe from friends
Morgan Online she's pretty :D
Every time I meet a mom like this I just think that their kid is going to end up like Norman Bates lol.
LOL
Have you ever considered sending your material/videos to Saturday Night Live? I seriously think you might hear back from them!
Jillane Hogard agree! It's perfect cause it's funny but relatable
Hilarious. Well done, pure talent.
OMG YES! I have had this happen in front of me with my pregnant cousin. We're Hispanic so our community is heavily Cuban so old Cuban women would tell her what she was doing wrong at every moment. even our grandmother would do this!
Oh my god this is HILARIOUS how did you keep a straight face
I love your accent, but it goes perfect with this for some reason. 😂
Sanctimommy! sounds like a cult or something lol
In some ways, I think it is. I felt sorry for sanctimommies when I was a new mom and had to deal with them on occasion. They seemed to have nothing else going on in their lives other than their children and virtually nonstop judgments of other moms. What a sad way to live.
+ *MrBibi86* - lol
SouthernASMR Sounds I thought harvest had natural births
You know, im not a mom (im only 17) but I'm an avid babysitter in NYC and i have been picking up these two girls from school in the city and taking them home to queens. They're pretty wild, but we have so much fun, and I've been on the bus with them, minding our own business but all be it being a little crazy when you know people want to step on with a smile on their face to me but trying to discipline these sweet girls!! Yes maybe they need a little more discipline then i'm giving them but that does not give the random lady that I may or may not know the right to discipline someone else kids. Not only does it not help but it undermines my "authority". Crazy people!
87 months 😂😂😂 I love ur videos not only relaxing but entertaining!
7 years lol
PLEASE do more roleplays with this character! I would love to see her do a passive-aggressive palm reading!
OMG this is hysterical... you're really witty.
Oh my god, this was hysterical! I don't have any children, but I have absolutely seen mothers like this. And your humour is so subtle and well delivered! Brilliant.
I just realized that "Nghees" name is a Frasier reference 😂😂
I love your bitchy role plays cause when I am down you make me laugh
"Haven is 41 months old, she was reading Beowolf and speaking Cantonese by the age of three, and last week she did my long form taxes for me."
Amazing.
Halcyonic Harvest: "Well, what can I say? Know better, DO better." #BlessedNotStressed #AmazingLife
Oh my gosh this is great!! I laughed so hard when I saw the shirt 😂
Thanks! I've been looking forward to wearing it! In videos is the only place I can do it. I can't exactly wear it out grocery shopping. :)
SouthernASMR Sounds dare you wear it out somewhere!
You get a lot of miseducation. My MIL shamed me horribly for breast feeding. She couldn't stop talking about how disgusting it was....and I got the people invading my personal bubble all the time when I was prego. I love my kids, but I'm never having another one if I can help it. I wish women would stop trying to break other women down instead of being supportive. It's hard enough already. PS: So funny. Keep it up :)
My mom had my brother and me in the late 60s/early 70s, and a Swedish nurse that my mom met in the hospital when my brother was born convinced her to breastfeed. Apparently this was very unpopular in the US during that time because a LOT of sanctimommies criticized her for it. They said it was disgusting, unsanitary, barbaric (?!), and just plain nasty.
I don't know why women are often so eager to tear each other down. It really bothers me that so many women choose to do this, whether it's about babies/pregnancy or other stuff. Imagine what we could accomplish if we just supported and encouraged each other.
As challenging as it is to be a mom these days, I can't imagine what our mothers went through. The more I learn about what my mom went through back in the day, the more I just want to give her a big bear hug and ask her forgiveness for being such an ungrateful little ass. If your mom's still around give her a huge hug and show her some love (sorry if that's sanctimomious). I agree about what women can achieve when they step out of the crab mentality mindset. It could be utterly amazeballs.
Ngee 87 months too funny, beowulf and taxes had me in stitches
SOME OF IT IS IN SANSKRIT omg that killed me i am now currently dead
I have no idea how I found this video or why I'm here but you deserve some kind of award for your outstanding performance here.
Awww.....Harvest is gonna get throat punched. lol Love it!
"My children, blindfolded, can sit down and make a completely accurate copy of a Rembrandt painting." I lost it 😂😂😂
this is fantastic! I can't stand moms like this and I think "attachment parenting" is such bullshit and more for the mom than the child. your tone and style in this video is PERFECT!
Alexandra Victoria yep. It is not going to help the child be independent when they grow up
My mother has never quite recovered from being told she couldn't breastfeed and it's a wonderful feeling to know there are people who understand what she's been through
I don't even have kids, but I loved it sooo much
I love harvest!! She is quickly becoming one of my favs! I think people who haven't watched any of your other videos and don't know your story might be offended but your amazing!!!
thank you for being considerate of people who may not enjoy this! i thought it was really thoughtful and considerate of you to give a warning to this. i know i personally am enjoying this though xx
I literally spewed my coffee out all over watching this. Great job, and I love the little one on your lap. LOLOLOL
87 months, so accurate xD
I actually snorted when you came in shot. "Harvest" 🍁🍂🦄🔮🕉
I love your videos! This made me laugh. I love your soft spoken voice and your accent 😍 xx
It's funny that as I have watched all the Harvest videos I go back and look at this one and think how Harvest became progressively more insane with every video. So in this video she seems normal by comparison.
That shirt! Namaste Bitches! ;D
That shirt. Hah!
Mary, I’m so glad that you turned comments back on. That rude person(s) was small minded and was probably just trying to make you upset for the fun of it, no matter how horrible it is to think of that. However, I feel as the comment section on your videos is what makes your channel feel like a community. I really hope you continue to post videos as they help so much with my anxiety and falling asleep at night. However, don’t rush your break, I just wanted to let you know that you are one of my favorite CZcamsrs and I love that you upload so much!😀
this is glorious!! you created this sanctimommy perfectly!
This is amazing! Thank you so much for the laughs :D Love your channel and videos too. Wish you all the best in life x
Lmfao this isn't a comedy channel? Your amazing!!!!!! Love your voice
Regarding these sanctimommies... life's too short to be condescending about other people's choices imo. I for one have enough with living my own life and not giving people hypocritical advice (of course i am talking about them). Oh boy! I died when you said 87 months and the other kid doing the taxes!! :) Great job as always.
NAMASTÉ BITCHES
Amen to that. I'm too busy minding my own business to worry about anybody else's.
definitely my favourite roleplays you do- I look forward to more love x
The one thing I tell all my friends who are expecting is "You are going to get a LOT of unsolicited advice. People will tell you all the wrong things you are doing and how you should raise your baby. Trust your instinct, because every baby is different and you know your little one best." Thank you for your video, Mary! Also, this was way to funny to be relaxing :P
ur so entertainingg!!!! 😂😂😂 i always watch asmr before bed but ur vids are hilarous and relaxing at the same thing😂
as soon as I you took your jacket off and I saw your shirt, I started laughing so hard😂 I love this!
“ I wear my children whenever possible”
😂😂😂😂 I cant even!! 🤣🤣🤣
Another perfectly funny role play. You're so darn good. I had never heard of Sanctimommies before but I visited the Facebook page and the comments are amazing, lol. :)
The comments to their posts are the best part!
Yesss! I was rushing into the store really quick Because my son had just spit up all over his hat and I didn't want him to be in the cold too long. This woman stopped me to scold me for not having a hat on him. it wasn't even THAT cold out. mid to upper 40s.
I have some serious resting bitch face though, so luckily I don't get many comments or unsolicited advice from strangers. Other than old men telling me to smile. ugh.
This would happen to my mom all the time when she was pregnant with me and then my brother. Touching strangers, touching their CHILDREN, all the advice she didn't want or need. I've met a few sanctimommies when out with my little cousins trying to give me their """helpful""" advice. We love you Mary, you work so hard for us and we appreciate you so much💙💙💙
she's so woke
Joshua Garner af
so accurate it hurts 😂😂 im one of 5 kids and my mom is always getting hit with "advice" like this... and yet, you somehow made it relaxing ?? great video !
OMG, I know this video is 3 years old, but I am 24 years old with my first daughter, who will be 6 months old this month, and I absolutely LOVE this 😂🤣 I love your honesty at the beginning, I relate to that a lot. And thanks for sharing the sanctimommy page, it’s wonderful.
Actually I like to describe my child's age in seconds.
A REAL mom of littles would use nanoseconds, but...I'm sure you're doing your best. :)
You are so right this happened to me as well. It is frustrating and I am sorry you had to encounter this type of behavior.. btw you are amazing and I love your videos.. thank you.
You are a Queen! Keep going with the roleplays! Love them...x
This was equally relaxing and hilarious! Thank you for your hard work and what you put into these videos and introducing me to my new favorite comedy Facebook page (although Harvest wouldn't approve of it).
i laughed so hard at this! please do another!!
YAS! You made a bold choice here and I like.
I really enjoyed this. You are absolutely hilarious! 😄😄😄
One of my coworkers is a sanctimommy! I CANNOT stand it because I've met her kids and they're not extraordinary or anything special. They're normal kids and one is just plain annoying 🙊
The sanctimommy that I had to deal with when I had my first child was like that. Constantly educating me on this or that, and her daughter was like a wild animal, and really nothing to brag about. She was already sanctimonious about stuff like her mommy. She was only six and already lecturing me about the evils of disposable diapers. (I guess in sanctimommy land, that made her advanced.)
SouthernASMR Sounds wonderful delight 🤓
just found your channel. subscribed bc this was just too great
hey hun ... great video ... I watched it back to back ... relaxing and humerus .... you just gained a new subscriber.. Keep up the good work
Oh my goodness, I was DYING LAUGHING the whole time. Perfection.
This is just bloody amazing honestly I applaud you
LOL "87 months old". that got me. I used to be a photographer and had a huge issue with women who would tell me their baby's age in months instead of years. The first year is fine, sure, but I definitely had a few that were in the twenties and thirties. So annoying. You nailed this role play. Thanks for doing it.
I'm not even a mom! Your videos are so entertaining it's 4am over here and I'm wide awake and can't stop watching now 😩
hahahaha nailed it. you are hilarious, & also spot on, lol
"I'm sure you've seen these children who are in front of screens all the time, they're like little zombies-"
harvest, you don't need to break the fourth wall
I'm only 12 minutes in and I'm dyyyyyying. You are HILARIOUS! The napkin resumé with sanskirt! I can't deal. LMFAOOO So, so good.
God, I ❤️your laid back personality!
it's not real,it"s a doll.hanging out in my closet .hold still.comedy Genius
The comedy is strong with this one.
19:19 - 19:32 makes me laugh so freaking hard, just your whole face and the whispering, it was so natural and hilarious
Whenever I watch your sanctimony videos I have dreams about my crush. Keep doing them!
I’m gonna be a *SHOOK* mom
I just love this!
It's like a revival of early 70's hippie mom's.
I love the role play and the shirt😂
loved loved loved this! you are slaying asmr right now! by far the most comitted, been with you since 3k subscribers. the more bitchy roleplays the better.this is the best xxxxx
You're so creative and versatile.
bloody brilliant video!
well done x
this video is years old but I’m here anyway, can we talk about how in the intro when Mary holds the doll she instinctively holds it to her shoulder and starts rocking a little?? 🥺🥺 so precious and sweet
love the tshirt! the roleplay was so funny lol
This is my favorite character of yours.... HANDS DOWN! I dont care for the pushy in your face bitchy videos, but this.... omgoodness this is perfection.
"I don't know what I did, to deserve perfect children" OML.
Spot on, and hilarious. I loved it so much!❤
I was NOT expecting that shirt! I laughed so hard!!! 😂😂😂
Oh my gosh!! second watch and seriously every line made me laugh!! you're too clever. Thanks Mary. You woke af :)
Yes, I know that. You don't have to tell me.
/sarc
I remember one day shortly after my father had passed away and I was having a horrible day I was in Target with my two young kids and they were misbehaving and going off and hiding in racks and being loud and what not. I was trying to tell them to stop, however I was so overwhelmed with grief, anger, and any other possible emotion you could be feeling I just didn’t have the energy to discipline them. All of a sudden a woman came up to me and said “that’s not how you should parent your children. I never yelled at my kids and they turned out great. Your kids are going to have some serious problems because of you when they are older.” It was the rudest and most mean thing I had ever been told by somebody in my whole life, and it was from a stranger in target! Lesson of the day, treat others how you want to be treated. Remember to always follow the golden rule.