MAGA Nuts Kick Out McCarthy, Marjorie Taylor Greene Wants Speaker Trump & Rudy Giuliani’s Drinking
Vložit
- čas přidán 2. 06. 2024
- The government sent out emergency alerts today and the conspiracy goblins were out in force warning everyone that it’s all part of a globalist plan to mutate us, the search for a new speaker is on after the MAGA nuts kicked out Kevin McCarthy, Klan Mom Marjorie Taylor Greene thinks it should be Donald Trump, Rudy Giuliani is back at the center of another investigation and federal prosecutors have reportedly been looking into his drinking, more than 75,000 employees of Kaiser Permanente walked off the job in the largest healthcare strike in American history, and Jimmy & Guillermo fry some rice and sling shrimp at Benihana.
SUBSCRIBE to get the latest #Kimmel: bit.ly/JKLSubscribe
Visit the Jimmy Kimmel Live Website : bit.ly/JKLWebsite
Like Jimmy Kimmel on Facebook: bit.ly/KimmelFB
Like Jimmy Kimmel Live on Facebook: bit.ly/JKLFacebook
Follow @JimmyKimmel on Twitter: bit.ly/KimmelTW
Follow Jimmy Kimmel Live on Twitter: bit.ly/JKLTwitter
Follow Jimmy Kimmel Live on Instagram: bit.ly/JKLInstagram
About Jimmy Kimmel Live:
Jimmy Kimmel serves as host and executive producer of Emmy®-nominated “Jimmy Kimmel Live!,” ABC’s late-night talk show. “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” is well known for its huge viral video successes, with over 15 billion views and more than 18 million subscribers on the show’s CZcams channel. Some of Kimmel’s most popular comedy bits include “Celebrities Read Mean Tweets,” “Lie Witness News,” “Unnecessary Censorship,” “Halloween Candy CZcams Challenge,” and music videos like “I (Wanna) Channing All Over Your Tatum.” - Komedie
A real life human experiment on what happens to someone when you don’t say no to them for 75 years
Leave ratchet Donny alone! How dare you?!
Or when you do say no and he just violates you anyway :/
Huh ??
7 7 fkn years. Thanks a lot, Fred and Mary Dump. You raised a real prince of a boy 😂😂😂
@@tonib.3016those immigrants parents of his ! Shame on them they should have stayed in their country
Well if thats the case obama needs to be speaker i could listen to him speak all day
Seconded.
@@ra6980Thirded 👍
@@Jillians1025fourthed!
FIFTHED.
There.... I beat Donnie to the Fifth.@@nicholasfarrell5981
fifth!!!
Marjorie Taylor Greene should be locked up
Reagan closed all the places she should be locked up in.
She was following David Hog around telling hi m he was a crisis actor isnt that not child annoyance
right next to Crooked Hillary and the Bidens
In an asylum
The Jewish space lazer would strike the prision and the MAGA storm trooper proud boys would spring her out all the dead gaurds are crisis actors and never really died
What’s going on in American politics right now is making me realise my life is not that bad after all, and that I’m actually a lot less insane than I thought.
Ditto!
Weird how Hollywood used to be the place for people doing really wild things... Now it's politics and Hollywood is, more mature? Big yikes
Lol, we’re doing great compared to them
Huh, Well I feel better now myself. Thanks guy. 😄
Right it's the rear thats insane not me
If I had 71 felony counts against me, I couldn't get a job at walmart as a cart pusher, yet tfg can be speaker of the house or president....wait...what?????
Er...91...thanks
That's DOOMocracy
91 bogus "charges"
@@panthekirb7561 don’t forget to put your cell phone in microwave during the gvt. test to avoid becoming a zombie. Oh wait you didn’t do the vaccine thingy
Should be 191!!!!
You remember back in the movie 2012 with John Cusack. Woody Harrelson played a crazy nut job living in a trailer in the middle of the woods doing some kind of Pirate radio broadcast talking about conspiracies and he was just generally considered to be a crazy nut job.
And now we’ve got all these people in their living room broadcasting on CZcams, saying the same kinds of things. Even crazier things and they’re no longer “ nut jobs” living in the woods. They are our neighbors. There are days I feel like this is the greatest that human Society is ever been. And then watching this crap I feel like humanity has declined 1000 years in the last 15
So glad you are back, Jimmy and Guillermo!!!!
So great to see Jimmy back! 😂🇦🇺🙏
I can't stress enough how thankful I am for late night monologues back. I needed these.
Me too!
May i know why non of the late night were airing ?? All these months I was wondering why
The union that represents entertainment writers went on strike for several months. They finally reached a deal with the corporations last week, and so the writers were able to resume work. Google it: Writers Guild of America Strike @@SupreethDT
It’s like therapy! I truly missed it.
@@SupreethDT writer's strike
7 Signs of a psychopath
• behavior that conflicts with all social norms.
• disregarding or violating the rights of others.
• inability to distinguish between right and wrong.
• extreme difficulty showing remorse or empathy.
• tendency to lie often, repeatedly. Behaving in impulsive and risky manner.
• extremely manipulative and exploitative without care of hurting others.
• no conscience or guilt, and refuse to accept responsibility for their actions.
tRump is def 7 for 7 😐
Another medical test that Turnip would “ace” that when a doctor gives you, suggests you have problems. It’s not the flex Turnip thinks it is to be prescribed a dementia test.
Awesome to bring awareness! 👍🏼
The 6 common signs of a sociopath: ‘They can be harder to spot than a psychopath.
Psychopaths tend to be more manipulative and minimize risk in criminal activities.
Sociopaths, on the other hand, are typically more erratic and rage-prone - and subsequently, more dangerous.
1. They know right from wrong but couldn’t care less.
2. Their personality is crafted to engage and enchant in order to bond and manipulate.
3. They don't always seem genuinely honest.
4. They know how to get your blood boiling.
5. Their worst tendencies quickly surface when they feel they are losing control over you.
6. They display false humility.
@@patriciacrane548indeed most definitely he is a psychopath.
SOUNDS EXACTLY LIKE TRUMP!
I'm so glad they are back, I was going nucking futs. Im so happy I could almost weep!🎉❤
So glad you're back Jimmy. This Canadian is greatful for your light-hearted push back on the crazies south of the border. Thank you.
JIMMY IS BACK!
No one indicted of a felony is eligible for the position. US House rules.
What do the rules say about 91 indictments?
@@jewdy8915Jewdy it’s 4 indictments and 91 federal counts.
No "member" of Congress, and the genius leadership of the Democratic Party has said "hush" "hush" to trying to drive a political movement to utilize the possible 14th Amendment, Section 3 remedy.
And the geniuses decided a great strategy to make the House situation better would be to side with the most extremist MAGAts so Jordan, Scalise, or Trump could become Speaker.
Geniuses I tell ya!
And that is a rule that the repubes made. I believe it’s Article 26
i so much hope that trump will never get close to Washington, but very close to a prison cell
I am happy that you are back. 🎉
It's wonderful to have you guys back!!😂😂 I've missed these monologs!! Great stuff!!
Here's a monologue - "Trump bad!" - Thunderous applause
In the insurance world there is a term called a write off. It is when a total lost occurs. I think it's time we acknowledge that approximately 27% of Americans should at this point be considered a write off. They ain't coming back.
they still get to vote.
the down side of democracy.
wh om will be ylur father and mothers house
@@Anicka-iq2tuwhat?
@@Anicka-iq2tuoh no! The spambots are malfunctioning. Orrrrrrr... this poor elderly person can barely use a computer and is trying super hard to argue online. Either way, super sad...
I wouldn't give up on them so easily. There's always the possibility of recycling any usable benign parts.
Love how Jimmy immediately succeeds with the Benihana bowl toss in practice, and completely fumbles it in front of his guests 🤣
Thank God Jimmy Kimmel and Guillermo is back!🎉
I spoke to my mom today and she tells me that a woman from the pool she swims at told her that the emergency alert was going to turn people into Zombies and I was convinced she either misunderstood what this lady was telling her or she wasn’t paying attention and this is what she heard 😅…WOW.
Nope. Your mom was right. The one time the truth is stranger than fiction. Our country is broken. 😂😂😂
That's MAGA logic for you.
Hey there! Just wanted to send you a warm and cheerful greeting to brighten up your day. I hope you're doing well and that your day is filled with happiness and positivity. Remember, you're capable of great things! 😊✨Good day to you 🥰
@@jahbernYou are right. If I were you,Id destroy ALL my devices... go on... do it...
@juliewick. Your mom was right. And all of those zombies are wearing Maga hats.
⚡️It's just so nice to have our late night shows back 😀 I've missed the Jimmys, Seth, Stephen, and John. ⚡️
Congrats to the writers!⚡️
Strike Force Five! ⚡️
I know I’m so glad they are back…
Me too!!!!
Imagine going on strike.... Only to come back and write the same liberal, indoctrination dribble you were writing before
@@mr.adassa4781 Here’s the thing: Comedy writers are smart people. They have to be able to conjure countless ideas and references. People who are smart are generally liberal. That’s why, for example, the faculties of US universities are liberal; because they’re highly educated and know how to analyze. And when you’re educated and know how to analyze, you know that the GOP is batshit crazy.
@kuhnemund6523
Liberals and mass formation psychosis.
Look into it.
Welcome back Jimmy Kimmel!👏🏼😊
So true about some people are already zombies due to their phones! 😵
Thank you Jimmy. You are a star!
Isn't the Speaker Of The House the next in line to be president if something happens the president and vice-president? That's a terrifying thought that someone might abuse this process to get their guy on top.
That's true and down right scary.
If Turnip was Speaker, loons would definitely be trying to take shots at Joe and Kamala.
Yes truly horrifying and insane.
Yes. And you could bet some of his goons would give it a red hot go.
Yep, that was like my first thought when I heard about this malarkey. 😬
I love this show! 💕🤗💕🤣😂
Hey there! Just wanted to send you a warm and cheerful greeting to brighten up your day. I hope you're doing well and that your day is filled with happiness and positivity. Remember, you're capable of great things! 😊✨Good day to you 🥰
Good to see you back Jimmy
91 felony counts, libel for sexual assault, and Republicans want this guy for speaker of the house,,,,,,”The party of Family values”,, now I really am afraid for our kids.
Nailed it!! Very scary indeed!!!!
Do you seriously think Trump is guilty of 91 felonies? Shouldn't that number in and of itself tell you that this is a political show trial to prevent him from running again? You don't even need to like Trump to concede that these methods are borderline fascistic.
It's not normal to be so fixated on child abuse (a specific kind of it, that I'm not comfortable typing), yet they mention it and accuse rivals of engaging in it constantly.
A man who was caught spray painting "groomer" on a library for hosting a drag story hour was also arrested for possession of (you guessed it).
Pelosi was better right? The president is cognitive all the time, doesn’t fall down from walking or climbing stairs or riding a bike, completes sentences that make sense and cares about Americans so much he taxes all of us and sends the money to other countries and allows illegals in by the thousands daily and gives our money to ship them all over the nation and provide all necessities meanwhile Americans lose everything in a fire and get 700 bucks for their troubles. That makes a lot of sense….. not!
When Trump said he'd get America back to work democrats had a panic attack.
Jimmy for President, Guillermo for Speaker of the House 🇺🇸
Hell no
👍
Guillermo gets paid more for doing nothing on the Kimmel show. Would be a bad move for him..
gross
They'd get more done than the MAGATS in the house that's for sure.
Hey Marjorie, WE don't want him back. Not for a second!!!
Greetings from Ireland my dear friend! Wishing you a beautiful day filled with sunshine, laughter, and endless possibilities. May every moment be filled with joy and positivity. Rise and shine, and make today amazing😊☀️Have a blessed day ahead 🥰
Talk about a great birthday experience. That woman will never forget that night at Benihana. Too funny.
So nice to have Jimmy back. I hope it’s the start of a trend toward normalcy.
Omg, now I have “Jesse’s girl” stuck in my head. 🙄😁Thanks Jimmy!
Hey there! Just wanted to send you a warm and cheerful greeting to brighten up your day. I hope you're doing well and that your day is filled with happiness and positivity. Remember, you're capable of great things! 😊✨Good day to you 🥰
Wow!! I can’t believe how much I missed Jimmy Kimmel!! All is right now!!
You got to laugh, it's all there is left to do in these times. :D Excellent show. Makes me feel better.
I’m so glad this show is back. Congrats to the writers again
Guillermo for Speaker!!!
Im really glad Jimmy is back.
The cooking was really fun to watch and what a surprise for the birthday girl.
Greetings from Ireland my dear friend! Wishing you a beautiful day filled with sunshine, laughter, and endless possibilities. May every moment be filled with joy and positivity. Rise and shine, and make today amazing😊☀️Have a blessed day ahead 🥰
He never shuts up now. Calling him speaker would just encourage him.
Malignant narcissist of the house?
So that means that President Obama can be speaker of the house !!! 😀
🇺🇸💙🇺🇸💙🇺🇸
A person with a gag order becomes speaker of the House!
How ridiculous America has become! 🤣🤣🤣
A man convicted of sexual assault, and facing many criminal indictments and presently in court for fraud being considered as speaker of the house and President!!
Look who your president and vice president are! That should tell you enough.
That’s MAGA republicans for you
😂😂😂
Imagine someone is speaker of the house who is in prison in Georgia.
That sounds about right.. give the Speaker of the House to the guy who has a federal Gag Order 😅😅
Hey there! Just wanted to send you a warm and cheerful greeting to brighten up your day. I hope you're doing well and that your day is filled with happiness and positivity. Remember, you're capable of great things! 😊✨Good day to you 🥰
😂😂😂😂😂good point
Perfect!!!
@Lucas-jy7be
That was very sweet!
I wasn't the intended recipient, but your message brightened my day, as well. It's very kind of you to think about making others happy.
@@Lucas-jy7be Thank You Lucas for the warm wishes. Just catching up on YT and appreciate your positive energy. Wishing you a beautiful evening.
My husband and I missed you Jimmy Kimmel. We are depressed for five months thank you for the laughs and keeping us up late.❤
Can he bring the gavel to prison or is this considered a weapon? 😂
Even The GOP can’t stand the GOP
Absolutely love that they're getting a taste of their own medicine
🤣🤣🤣✌️✌️
Dems just put up with crooked Dems.
A house 🏠 divided can not stand - Abraham Lincoln, The 16th president of the United States.
@@Xecutioner.Okay China
Per Congressional rules, a person indicted for felonies cannot be named speaker of the House.
A member indicted, not any person.
@@sijdnsd6460regardless, Trump will never be speaker for many reasons.
Republicans love convicts
Which a temporary Speaker could change, and I suppose you wouldn't put that past this GOP, and I suppose you supported this stupid move by Democrats to join the most extreme MAGAts in getting what they wanted, either Jordon, Scalise, or Trump.
Very true 😊
I have been laughing like crazy!!😂😂😂😂
Your stint as cooks was hilarious. I snorted and teared. So happy you are back
The man who could not stay 😂sitting in court as his own fortune is drained away is going to sit in Congress, day in day out? Sure
Hey there! Just wanted to send you a warm and cheerful greeting to brighten up your day. I hope you're doing well and that your day is filled with happiness and positivity. Remember, you're capable of great things! 😊✨Good day to you 🥰
Have you seen the polls lately? lol
The real majority will not be denied this time around. Watch.
President Trump 2024
Oh gosh I am so glad you are back, Jimmy! I missed this!
Jimmy, please keep making fun of these hilarious conspiracy theories. That was fantastic! 😂
I’ve watched Stephen Seth & both Jimmy’s so glad your all back we are Thrilled !! 💙💙💙💙💙💙💙💙
Bring in Donald Trump to settle things down that's like bringing in The Little rascals to calm down the Three stooges
Lo r this comment! 🤣
@@jbrd2959 Sounds like he is around Dirty Donnie's age! How old are you...9?
Department stores figured this out years ago, steel posts filled with concrete and spaced evenly in front of the entrances... stops 'em dead in their tracks.
Good point. Police stations need those.
whom is your brother Don
Jimmy love your show you are spot on about the crazies
Most nights these days watching the news practically leaves me in tears🤦🏻♀️😢.....JIMMY, your the SAVIOR to my soul. THANK YOU for all the BELLY laughs & BLESS you!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
🤣 Yay!!! Jimmy, Guillermo, the band and the whole crew are back!!! 🥳 Miss everybody so bad!!! We were all pulling for you too!
"Say it,Jimmy! Say it louder,Jimmy! Say it again,Jimmy!"
Remember that? I do.
What a weak little worm Jimmy is.
What kind of Speaker would Rump be, a woofer or a tweeter? 🤣
last name and dog tags
Definitely a tweeter. He doesn't have what it takes to be a woofer. 😂
A Boss speaker with grand balls . Alpha dude.
@@erwinsm10 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Sub-Woofer. He’s the lowest of the low.
Never been funnier Jimmy! Excellent monologue!!!
Amazing the number of people that laugh at reality.
I would say let’s put Guillermo for speaker of the house 😂😂😂
Hey there! Just wanted to send you a warm and cheerful greeting to brighten up your day. I hope you're doing well and that your day is filled with happiness and positivity. Remember, you're capable of great things! 😊✨Good day to you 🥰
Even If He Is A Little Drunk While Cooking...
@@Lucas-jy7be thanks to you as well😃😃
@@127Claumc How are you feeling today??
@@127Claumc Where are you chatting from??
Can Speakers of the House pardon themselves? Asking for an orange skinned friend.
Hey there! Just wanted to send you a warm and cheerful greeting to brighten up your day. I hope you're doing well and that your day is filled with happiness and positivity. Remember, you're capable of great things! 😊✨Good day to you 🥰
No. But Speakers cannot be indicted for felonies carrying a sentence of at least 2 years. So your orange friend is already disqualified Im afraid...
😂😂😂😂
😂😂
@@wills5310 my mother died in 2004.
People are NUTS!!
As I have always thought Kimmel had the best writers ! Jimmies delivery is so authentic, one gets the feeling it just popped into his head .
The guy with a gag order the GOP is considering for speaker 🤠
Cosmic, karmic sarcasm.
Excellent point!
By lunatics that think they're smart. We're doomed!
David Geovanis's Wharton lover Donald would enjoy just pounding the gavel and maybe sitting on the floor playing with legos and toy cars, pretending one day he might learn to do more than aim a golf cart away from the sand traps...
The Guy with a Oatmeal Brain is Running The Country !!!
Benihana Chef takes his work pretty seriously!!!! That he was able to give a positive spin "are the customers happy?', navigating a culture/language different than his first, is pretty amazing. He honestly didn't think they were game-ready, hahahah!
He looked ready to cry, it is nice to see someone take such pride in their work/art/passion.
I so happy Jimmy is back!!!❤
Soooo happy you are all back!!!!
I am so happy late night TV is back. It's been a quiet few months
Kevin Mccarthy's dreams have been shattered, Poor guy
Hahaha 😅
He only wanted the speaker position on his resume when applying for lobbyist jobs anyway.
I KNOW! Isn't it GREAT?!
@stratostatic hard to be a lobbyists if you have no political clout or any clout for that matter lol
Let's take a moment of silence.....🎉🎉😂😂😂
Good to be laughing again! Thanks welcome back
Trump is in court and Mccarthy out as speaker. Great day for democracy and America.
Hello, friends from America.
"Democracy"
It was also turn into zombie Wednesday.
@@Sebastian-np7uc You would love to be owned by your master, putin. 🤣
I live in NZ.. but still glad..im a kiwi
Can we give credit to the writing staff and editors for making this in mere hours?
Perhaps much of it was written prior, they knew they were coming back, and would have quite the backlog.....🛠
No.
Better pay & better conditions...ABSOLUTELY!! I had 22-24 patients to look after & OSHA limits it at13. Busy doesn't begin to cover it. The sad part is that it is the patient who suffers bc ee don't have time to chat, ask after family & interests, etc. These are the kinds of conversations that help patients heal & give them the will to fight for a return to their lives .
One moment now!!!! Did Jimmy just crack an egg with one-hand! RESPECT!
Love you Jimmy! Glad you're back, now I can go to bed smiling and laughing❤🎉
I am not like you open every body stone hade craze laide.
You know me every body love me for you after me back you find but nothing happen things. Bigger meale.
That guy driving his vehicle literally into the police station, is a testament to the lengths some people will go to for those delicious jail house bologna sandwiches:)
Pretty sure that was the qanon shaman
Yeah he's getting the bologna all right
That’s my local news station! I watch Melanie and Jim everyday. That was surreal!!
Yes it’s surreal because it’s called immersive journalism and didn’t happen like it’s being portrayed.
@@ricpla6930…Sure sure…
LOL at the Benihara trainee chefs!!
DT really has hypnotized half of America. A reality show star 😂
1/3 of America
@@steveborne9821 no, 1/3 of Republicans
I am sooooooo happy jimmy is back😊😊😊🎉❤
It's an act, he is miserable, getting ready to divorce.
@@malachi- bc he's ready to take your mom, your sister, your daughter, your niece, your grandma, and your cousin.
@@Thehardtruth69 FO worker.
They all should be voted out to stop the craziness
I have f’ng missed you, Jimmy and team!
I think Jimmy and Guillermo would make a terrific chef. I'm sure glad that they are back.
the problem with the speaker of the house is that it implies lots of work.
And political acumen. They should just hire Nancy again. She was pretty good at both parts.
@roc7880 - No "executive time", eh?
Thanks Jimmy. We really needed some levity with all this nonsense going on
Ha ha ha ha so glad to have you back .
Thank God you are back, we missed you so much!!!!!
The only reason Trump would be interested in the speakership would be him thinking it would get him out of his trials.
He thought that about being an ex Prez
He is going to win all court cases anyway it’s a fact ! Let’s talk about Biden taking money from China now , that’s the real issue
What crimes?
@@john_smithchiropractor3931And Kevin McCarthy thought being Speaker would give him power. How did that turn out?
@john_smithchiropractor3931
What? Read the indictments. Its freely available.
Loved to see both Jimmy and Guillermo cooking. Was fun!
So glad your back on the youtube. Have not laughed so hard for a while. Love you Guillermo. You too Jiminy.
Thank you Jimmy you’re my lifesaver bring on the jokes . Thank you.
Jimmy is a good chef. He fails to pretend to be a bad one..
The look of horror of the chef when Jimmy eats half cooked shrimp 😂😂😂
@@jpdenboer4365 The chef went totally silent when asked for an honest review.
@@shantanumishra9106 LOL true, but it's also visible after a few seconds that both him and Guillermo know their way around a kitchen.
Things he does to get attention.....don't impress much....tq
@@shirleycameron7718 29 thousand people disagree with you on that. Tq
WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE CRAZY PEOPLE!! I AM SO TIRED OF THEM FAWNING OVER ONE OF THE MOST HORRIBLE PEOPLE THAT EVER LIVED. SICK! I hope I live long enough to see him in prison and never talked about again!
Welcome back writers! Thank you Jimmy. Love seeing you back buddy
Love jimmy kimmel!
You have no idea how much i need these laughs! Thank you!
Hello 👋
It's all sick and disturbing!
There may actually be a viable and lucrative market for tin foil hats in America..
I'm so glad Jimmy Kimbel is back.
He nobody
Boy I sure missed this Awesome