Batman's Kryptonite Addiction

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  • čas přidán 9. 09. 2024
  • Batman reveals the extent of his crippling addictions to the Justice League.
    This is a sequel to • Batman's Kryptonite Cave
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Komentáře • 327

  • @Jonathan_Collins
    @Jonathan_Collins Před měsícem +4137

    I love how they all immediately jump on board with the 'Keeping up with the Kryptonites' idea.

    • @notOppie
      @notOppie Před měsícem +101

      I mean like when money talk even the deaf listens ig?

    • @dazzlethestar151
      @dazzlethestar151 Před měsícem +12

      Oh wow we commented the same thing, cool :)

    • @cosmicdubs8155
      @cosmicdubs8155 Před měsícem +27

      While also ignoring that they all had cancer.

    • @ignaciocampos5625
      @ignaciocampos5625 Před měsícem

      ​@@cosmicdubs8155with that much money they could buy cancer

    • @shadowsnake5133
      @shadowsnake5133 Před měsícem +7

      ​@@cosmicdubs8155 and lex won technically... Probably also has cancer, but at least he might die after Superman now.

  • @meliorbutterfly
    @meliorbutterfly Před měsícem +2525

    at least this one is a happy ending

    • @JohnnyOMalley22
      @JohnnyOMalley22 Před měsícem +88

      Martian Manhunter: Batman still has cancer.
      Superman: Not to worry, J'onn. I've already working on a cure for cancer.
      Flash: Does the cure involve a dragon?
      Superman: No, why would it involve a dragon?
      Flash: Dragon my nuts!
      Batman: Shut up, Flash. That joke was more annoying than my last chemo treatment.

    • @deadlypandaghost
      @deadlypandaghost Před měsícem +12

      Other than the cancer.

    • @vaggos2003
      @vaggos2003 Před měsícem +6

      And the Parasite still going on a genocidal rampage.​@@deadlypandaghost

    • @smsff7
      @smsff7 Před měsícem +6

      Except for the cancer.

    • @user-sw3tb2km8p
      @user-sw3tb2km8p Před měsícem +5

      @@deadlypandaghost Nah Batman is right here - Supes probably can make him cure with Krypton's technology, and John Konstantin or Zatanna would just use magic to cure him... Not really a problem for superhero so important.

  • @ravenshrike
    @ravenshrike Před měsícem +836

    Gotta say, being able to rebuild and destroy a planet for only billions is a really damned efficient use of money.

    • @theapexsurvivor9538
      @theapexsurvivor9538 Před měsícem +27

      The Magratheans are more interested in the treasure hunt, but they feel that requesting payment is still important.

    • @user-wx4bj3rx5t
      @user-wx4bj3rx5t Před 29 dny

      ​ that is the funniest comment I've seen in at least a year and I'm chronically online@@theapexsurvivor9538

  • @JohnnyOMalley22
    @JohnnyOMalley22 Před měsícem +1998

    Ah yes, Pink Kryptonite. I remember the story about that.
    "Did I ever tell you how Smashing you look in bowties, Jimmy?"

    • @battlesheep2552
      @battlesheep2552 Před měsícem +128

      We don't talk about the pink one

    • @LordDarthHarry
      @LordDarthHarry Před měsícem +72

      There's also an alternative version in Justice League Action where it just gender bends Superman.

    • @kwayneboy1524
      @kwayneboy1524 Před měsícem +61

      ​@@LordDarthHarrywhich is still gay because Clark is straight so female form Clark is a lesbian.

    • @Greenkitten45
      @Greenkitten45 Před měsícem +21

      That was crazy! 😂
      They should adapt pink kryptonite to newer series.

    • @joaovinicius3403
      @joaovinicius3403 Před měsícem +17

      It's so wild that people forget Superman marrying a non-kryptonian Supergirl and having a daughter with her in the same issue (a plot point DC entirely dropped since that Supergirl series was cancelled for low sales and they decided to just bring Kara back).

  • @alexhuntercdc5151
    @alexhuntercdc5151 Před měsícem +880

    All fun and games until the round table start glowing pink

    • @aminaqif542
      @aminaqif542 Před měsícem +46

      That is superman problem not the justice League.

    • @pixelmace1423
      @pixelmace1423 Před měsícem

      @@aminaqif542the Superman finds the league very… trustworthy

    • @justarandombluebird8222
      @justarandombluebird8222 Před měsícem +15

      We don't talk about the pink one

    • @user-vv8ve4px5j
      @user-vv8ve4px5j Před 28 dny

      And Wonder Woman isn't around. Just saying.

    • @AiriMagePRISM
      @AiriMagePRISM Před 24 dny +2

      It’s alright, Superman’s lost his powers here, it probably won’t work…
      …UNLESS IT NEVER REALLY WORKED IN THE FIRST PLACE!

  • @valmid5069
    @valmid5069 Před měsícem +130

    0:55 *No no he’s got a point*

  • @thelegomaster173
    @thelegomaster173 Před měsícem +1149

    Shut up flash.

  • @GiacomoSorbi
    @GiacomoSorbi Před měsícem +278

    No matter the continuity: all across the multiverse, three lone words echoes in perpetuity - "Shut up, Flash!"

  • @JohnnyOMalley22
    @JohnnyOMalley22 Před měsícem +550

    The Flash: The Watchtower's ran outta soda?
    Batman: Shut up, Flash!
    Me: Off to a great start.

  • @RandoGrunt
    @RandoGrunt Před měsícem +112

    1:50 I love the subtle One Ring moment there, lol.

  • @beckywilson1550
    @beckywilson1550 Před měsícem +539

    Its just a green rock how bad can it be

    • @hermitcard4494
      @hermitcard4494 Před měsícem +75

      A GLOWING green rock.

    • @ccelite3782
      @ccelite3782 Před měsícem +56

      "It's just the color yellow"
      - Me, to Green Lantern

    • @Lazymindflayerwithcofffee
      @Lazymindflayerwithcofffee Před měsícem +15

      Famous last words

    • @gulver8693
      @gulver8693 Před měsícem +30

      When the radioactive glow is in the visible spectrum, it’s bad.

    • @beckywilson1550
      @beckywilson1550 Před měsícem +16

      @@hermitcard4494 so its a good night light nothing can go wrong

  • @fnln3011
    @fnln3011 Před měsícem +112

    I like that Superman apparently had kyptonite at home and somehow never noticed

    • @almessasorrow4950
      @almessasorrow4950 Před měsícem +18

      He typically doesn't notice if he's affected by non green kryptonite so that tracks.

  • @BeltFruits
    @BeltFruits Před měsícem +177

    Batman in a group of kryptonite addicts

    • @potsdam28
      @potsdam28 Před měsícem +22

      Okay Luthor I’m guessing runs it

  • @machao195
    @machao195 Před měsícem +129

    Every heroes and villains, even every side characters, has the right to tell Flash to shut up, when he's speaking nonsense.

    • @pvshka
      @pvshka Před měsícem +12

      I know, right? How could the Watchtower ever run out of soda?

    • @meiwasstruc2914
      @meiwasstruc2914 Před 29 dny +1

      When he's speaking*

  • @Halilpasar
    @Halilpasar Před měsícem +38

    “The Pink one”
    *_We don’t talk about the pink one…_*

  • @maestrulgamer9695
    @maestrulgamer9695 Před měsícem +23

    0:27-I know what a googleplex is,but NO WAY Batman has no much!

    • @MIIRBH
      @MIIRBH Před 28 dny

      Yes, its quite literally impossible to get that much

    • @0biwan7
      @0biwan7 Před 25 dny +3

      @@MIIRBH unless he is using multiverse to store stuff

  • @Godzilla_Beast_of_Revelation
    @Godzilla_Beast_of_Revelation Před měsícem +286

    We went from Beast giving Xavier cancer to Batman giving the entire Justice League cancer.
    I wonder what's gonna happen to The Seven💀💀💀

    • @ultraklash5518
      @ultraklash5518 Před měsícem +12

      Probably gonna be pretty DEEP if you know what I mean

    • @GoldenBoyBlue
      @GoldenBoyBlue Před měsícem +13

      The Seven will be the most moral people on the channel.

    • @if7723
      @if7723 Před měsícem +9

      Homelander actually goes around curing people of cancer with his laser eyes. He just doesn't quite understand that everyone isn't taking a nap afterwards.

    • @lewisaino
      @lewisaino Před 3 dny

      ​@@GoldenBoyBlueHomelandrr saying OK Orphan Boomer

  • @ranpan6082
    @ranpan6082 Před měsícem +31

    Batman: How did you beat cancer?
    Lex Luthor: Brainiac. He shot a nanotech payload into my back when he held me hostage and forced me to build a new body for him.

    • @potsdam28
      @potsdam28 Před měsícem +7

      Batman: Hmm he was inside me too…not doing that again.

    • @ranpan6082
      @ranpan6082 Před měsícem +4

      @@potsdam28 Lex Luthor: He gave me super strength as well.

  • @BeltFruits
    @BeltFruits Před měsícem +47

    Flash: cancer?
    Batman: yes flash I sleep in a kryptonite bed every night😂

  • @reggyjohnson9083
    @reggyjohnson9083 Před měsícem +85

    Here before this blows up…… like Krypton!!!

    • @marmyeater
      @marmyeater Před měsícem +7

      Again. It's apparently been rebuilt a lot.

  • @dazzlethestar151
    @dazzlethestar151 Před měsícem +42

    I'd unironically watch 'Keeping up with the Kryptonites', sounds thrilling.

  • @warrenbradford2597
    @warrenbradford2597 Před měsícem +1258

    Batman: “I store Kryptonite in your houses, too.” Edit note: thanks for me so many likes. I did not think I get this many from this comment.😀

    • @talgoren2246
      @talgoren2246 Před měsícem +58

      probably not in Superman's house, since he would actually notice.

    • @Super-Saiyan-Blue-Gogeta
      @Super-Saiyan-Blue-Gogeta Před měsícem +20

      @@talgoren2246 Blue Kryptonite

    • @endaeye
      @endaeye Před měsícem +35

      ⁠@@Super-Saiyan-Blue-Gogetapink kryptonite, explains why he and Lois haven’t slept in a while

    • @HexPerplex
      @HexPerplex Před měsícem +1

      Is this AI voices by question?

    • @stegmannboy15
      @stegmannboy15 Před měsícem +1

      superman be like: why do i always feel sick and weak at home

  • @lenart5417
    @lenart5417 Před měsícem +29

    Batman "How much Krypto......nite?"🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @raihokyol1566
    @raihokyol1566 Před měsícem +187

    Batman: I have so much Kryptonite and I do crazy stuff with it.
    Team: you're insane!
    Batman : I've made a TV show with it that make all of us rich.
    Team: You're a genius!

  • @dimancor2925
    @dimancor2925 Před měsícem +34

    Now i want to see Kryptonite treasure hunt

    • @NSAsterus949
      @NSAsterus949 Před měsícem +7

      "Aww, dangit! It's a blue one. Superman doesn't always care when you whip out the blue ones"

  • @oliveragag8576
    @oliveragag8576 Před měsícem +31

    Batman and Lex and the biggest contributors to the support group.

  • @SEWY7.
    @SEWY7. Před měsícem +32

    “Keeping up with the kryptonites” 😅💀

  • @rRD1496
    @rRD1496 Před měsícem +60

    It’s fine he’s probably has a contingency for cancer and the pink kryptonite induced kind

  • @thegreatscribbles960
    @thegreatscribbles960 Před měsícem +8

    I cant give over a group of grown men dressing up as superman and pretending to be affected by kryptonite I'm dying

  • @tj1020
    @tj1020 Před měsícem +13

    Kryptonite can be manufactured, and kryptonite energy can be stored like a battery. Also, it doesn't take much of it to affect Superman. At times even gum or powder of Kryptonite is all that is needed to negatively affect the man of steel.

    • @revolverocelot1380
      @revolverocelot1380 Před měsícem +4

      Nah it's honestly super inconsistent and how much it affects Superman heavily depends on whether the writer wants it to. Superman has nearly died from being near a shard in some stories but in some others he takes a kryptonite bullet deep into his chest and he's fine and dandy with only a little sickness.

  • @ElectricalMatthew
    @ElectricalMatthew Před měsícem +23

    How did Batman run out of room did he fill both the bat cave and Wayne manor and does this mean Alfred and the robins also have cancer.

    • @lorekeeper685
      @lorekeeper685 Před měsícem

      I think this means warwhouses too

    • @hafirenggayuda
      @hafirenggayuda Před měsícem

      Tbf, bat cave and manor store all other stuff too (tools, memorabillia, Robins)

  • @fabiopauli420
    @fabiopauli420 Před 28 dny +3

    "Kyroptonite is a rare element from Krypton!"
    "Rare my ### last week i stopped a mugger that had three crystals just in his pocket."

  • @Chibimano
    @Chibimano Před měsícem +6

    Love the continuity of Batman having so much Kryptonite that he sleeps on a bed made of it.

  • @mendozax0345
    @mendozax0345 Před měsícem +12

    I love how supe is immediately distracted by the tv show

  • @codetaku
    @codetaku Před měsícem +5

    Batman being generous with company shares is the only surprising part of this video

  • @zzodysseuszz
    @zzodysseuszz Před měsícem +7

    I don’t know but imagining Batman dressed up as superman in a large therapy group filled with people dressed up as superman all pretending to be affected by kryptonite is the funniest shit in this video.

  • @coltontheabsoluteweirdo2116

    0:47 “Your cancers contagious!?”
    Best line ever

  • @UnitedFan2
    @UnitedFan2 Před měsícem +10

    Lex and Batman should have a chat about how much they are addicted to kryptonite

    • @Pogüiro
      @Pogüiro Před měsícem +1

      They have it every day in the support group for kryptonite addicts

  • @AlonzoDCraig
    @AlonzoDCraig Před měsícem +8

    Bro said a googolplex! Batman has become my favorite JL member.

  • @jakubport7361
    @jakubport7361 Před měsícem +4

    I tore my stitches from laughing, thanks a lot, man 😅

  • @monstery8027
    @monstery8027 Před měsícem +2

    Batman: I needed more
    Flash: you need help!
    💀

  • @sureindubitably3771
    @sureindubitably3771 Před měsícem +2

    "Batman, did you give us all cancer?!"
    A laugh track would've made that scene perfect imo lol

  • @Salutethesun2
    @Salutethesun2 Před měsícem +2

    "I stored kryptonite in you houses, too" how tf is Superman not dead?

    • @mattdavis9601
      @mattdavis9601 Před měsícem

      Because Clark Kent stays over at Lois' house most nights.

  • @TheDarkKnight-lf5ce
    @TheDarkKnight-lf5ce Před měsícem +24

    BATCANCER

  • @darkreflection9087
    @darkreflection9087 Před měsícem +6

    To be fair Kryptonite is a really cool glowing rock

  • @charmgman0118
    @charmgman0118 Před měsícem +2

    You know the funniest thing about this is that its accurate that there's seems to be that much kryptonite on Earth

  • @Godzilla-tu2cd
    @Godzilla-tu2cd Před měsícem +10

    😂😂😂 kryptonite the worst kind of addiction

  • @theemotionalremix
    @theemotionalremix Před měsícem +4

    Keeping up with the Kryptonites? More like keeping up with the Crypto maniacs 💀💀💀

  • @tyrellblazer523
    @tyrellblazer523 Před měsícem +1

    Batman took never let them know your next step to a whole new level

  • @EdmundLoh
    @EdmundLoh Před měsícem +11

    SHUT UP FLASH is back!

  • @user-Reader_of_ALL
    @user-Reader_of_ALL Před měsícem +3

    It sounds like Lex, actualy

  • @Titanusrex1616
    @Titanusrex1616 Před měsícem +1

    Plot twist: Batman was shot by Zarbar’s cancer ray while he was sleeping

  • @clyax113
    @clyax113 Před měsícem +7

    It always bothered me about the fact that Lex Luthor gets cancer and people realize long-term exposure of kryptonite causes cancer yet Batman never gets cancer. No one ever addresses that ever. Glad we're asking the hard-hitting questions on a 2 decade old series.

    • @hafirenggayuda
      @hafirenggayuda Před měsícem +4

      Tbf, Batman store the Kryptonite safely when not used, while Lex probably basked in its radiation every night

  • @mercce6750
    @mercce6750 Před měsícem +3

    Now he understands what Lex went through

  • @treanmunt1420
    @treanmunt1420 Před měsícem +3

    The Kryptoniter Gets
    Kryptonited

  • @Paolo-ec2si
    @Paolo-ec2si Před měsícem +11

    If Bats is obsessed with Kryptonite the i expect him to have all the other colors other than the usuale boring green.
    Black
    Red
    Blue
    White
    Pink
    Yellow

  • @darkfall7250
    @darkfall7250 Před měsícem +1

    Superman: "Parasite just stole my powers and is committing mass murder."
    Everyone: ...
    Martian Manhunter: "That sounds bad"

  • @gabexd4386
    @gabexd4386 Před měsícem +1

    Why is nobody talking about how they're saying mass murder is not as serious as running out of soda

  • @kingdonut6675
    @kingdonut6675 Před měsícem +2

    Why is Superman surprised that Batman has this much Kryptonite? Every two bit criminal in Metropolis has Kryptonite!

    • @kingdonut6675
      @kingdonut6675 Před měsícem +1

      What if Batman is supplying the criminals of Metropolis with Kryptonite to keep Superman in check🤯

  • @zombiedemon1762
    @zombiedemon1762 Před 23 dny +1

    Now I like to think Batman gets high, smoking kryptonite.

  • @fiddleriddlediddlediddle
    @fiddleriddlediddlediddle Před 26 dny +2

    According to Google, a googol is 1 followed by 100 zeroes and a googolplex is 10 raised to the power of googol, or 1 with a googol zeroes behind it. Also, according to Google, the number is so massive it surpasses the number of particles in the known universe.
    If we measure it in atoms, Batman claims to have a volume of Kryptonite larger than the entire mass of the known universe.

  • @callofhaloinfinite6336
    @callofhaloinfinite6336 Před 27 dny +1

    If you think about it: if Batman didn't carry Kryptonite for contingency plans, he can definitely afford it when the need arises.

  • @Samuel-vw4yv
    @Samuel-vw4yv Před měsícem +1

    I imagine that Batman has an entire room in the Bat Cave solely dedicated for storing the majority of the world’s kryptonite quantity

  • @RyanRicardo-nw7fe
    @RyanRicardo-nw7fe Před měsícem +1

    I always imagined Batman walking off and getting himself tested after the news of luthor's cancer get out

  • @lsixty30
    @lsixty30 Před měsícem +1

    Superman tryna rizz up Parasite with that pink kryptonite

  • @LostWallet
    @LostWallet Před měsícem +1

    batman out here looking out for his homies

  • @The-Black-Serpent-Syndicate
    @The-Black-Serpent-Syndicate Před měsícem +1

    Batman: It's a group for kryptonite addicts. We dress up as supper man and portend to be affected by kryptonite. That one made me crack a smile. 😆😆😆

  • @gerihuginn2143
    @gerihuginn2143 Před měsícem +1

    The idea of rebuilding Krypton and blowing it up again to go on a space tresure hunt for kryptonite is what broke me dude . That should've scared the shit out of Superman .
    Also love the fact that there are so many kryptonite addicts .

  • @dreski83
    @dreski83 Před 25 dny

    maaaaaannnn... I was NOT ready for that level of laughter 😂 I'm in trouble at work now...

  • @Aerowarrier
    @Aerowarrier Před měsícem +1

    Good to know Lex and Bruce are friends in this continuity

  • @NinjaBaiano-br
    @NinjaBaiano-br Před měsícem +2

    We dont talk about the pink one.

  • @russtaiv9661
    @russtaiv9661 Před měsícem +2

    We all dress up as Superman...Batmans got issues lol.

  • @Virgosantanaaa
    @Virgosantanaaa Před 28 dny

    I’m gonna keep that “do you know what a googleplex is” in my back pocket from now on

  • @BeetrootDude
    @BeetrootDude Před měsícem +1

    This video is literally just the sentence “Well that escalated quickly.”

  • @MyShiroyuki
    @MyShiroyuki Před měsícem +1

    Would imagine Superman would be a good kryptonite radar for the treasure hunts

  • @warwickmorrison6073
    @warwickmorrison6073 Před 7 dny

    Hahaha! Keeping up with the kryptonites killed me! 😂😂😂

  • @facuasecas-bp4zj
    @facuasecas-bp4zj Před měsícem +2

    We all dress as Superman 😂😂

  • @noir-214
    @noir-214 Před měsícem +1

    I was actually thinking when it was revealed what kryptonite does to regular people in Justice league the animated series I was hoping what happened to Lex Luthor didn't happen to Batman

  • @Scythephighting
    @Scythephighting Před 10 dny +1

    This reminds of a channel that did old bat man scenes and this is like, the modern one with the crappy mics and all of that and the music

  • @cyanaura5044
    @cyanaura5044 Před měsícem

    Man, Solid JJ Batman wasn't lying when he said that Kryptonite aren't rare and everyone has one lmao

  • @yui_riku2896
    @yui_riku2896 Před 17 dny

    "do you know what a googleplexe is ?"
    well either he can travel between infinite dimensions, or he don't know neither

  • @david7522
    @david7522 Před měsícem +1

    Flash "so you just carry a block of kryptonite around in your belt at all times.
    In case you, what?
    Suddenly need to kill superman."
    Batman "yes"
    Flash "is.... Is there something in one of those pockets to kill me?"
    Batman narrows eyes menacingly and walks away
    Flash to himself "oh there totally is. That spooky bastard."

  • @oliveragag8576
    @oliveragag8576 Před měsícem +1

    I'm pretty sure all of Krypton followed Superman's rocket and landed on Earth.

    • @potsdam28
      @potsdam28 Před měsícem

      Just Supergirl. And Krypto. And Zod. And the city of Kandor. And…

  • @Voids_Enigma
    @Voids_Enigma Před měsícem +1

    And then the popularity of the show grew until it spanned the entire DC omniverse
    And then they all went to war after people’s ships of the kryptonites didn’t align with what was actual cannon

  • @speedstorm0332
    @speedstorm0332 Před 23 dny

    Meanwhile, Parasite is using his newfound Kryptonian powers to casually slaughter millions. To quote Superman, "It's a genocide down there."

  • @th3ra83
    @th3ra83 Před 29 dny +1

    Wonder Woman: Why Man dies earlier than Woman Dinah? Kinda curious don't you think?
    The Boys:

  • @jaydefur.e
    @jaydefur.e Před měsícem

    Batman's taking the fact that he has cancer from Kryptonite surprisingly well unlike Luthor did.

  • @Alertacobra12
    @Alertacobra12 Před měsícem

    "You get therapy?" Caught me off guard 💀💀💀

  • @marmyeater
    @marmyeater Před měsícem +1

    This one is my new favorite.

  • @kaczok1985
    @kaczok1985 Před měsícem

    To be fair to Batman, in one of the Lego DC movies Wonder Woman also mentioned that it would be a good idea to get some Kryptonite "just in case".

  • @pitioti
    @pitioti Před 20 dny

    I love how things really went south and everyone losed their minds XD

  • @DinoLoverGaming
    @DinoLoverGaming Před měsícem

    Flash: Batman, how much kryptonite do you have?
    batman: yes

  • @mrsamaritan6881
    @mrsamaritan6881 Před měsícem

    You kmow things have gone too far when Flash tells you you're being irresponsible.

  • @zetamangads
    @zetamangads Před měsícem +1

    This oddly wholesome for batman XD

  • @arfdelay
    @arfdelay Před měsícem +2

    I have lego cancer

  • @zombiedemon1762
    @zombiedemon1762 Před 23 dny +1

    I love it. Can we get a sequel to this?

  • @darmam0o
    @darmam0o Před měsícem +1

    This is one of your best ones.

  • @jovee6155
    @jovee6155 Před měsícem

    Everyone is immediately on board when he mentioned they're all rich

  • @CandyApples4ever
    @CandyApples4ever Před měsícem

    I think superman is gonna need a therapist after this 😂

  • @Ivan210bluboi
    @Ivan210bluboi Před měsícem

    "Only to destroy it again and go on a Kryptonite treasure hunt"
    Bro thinks he's Knuckles 😭