25 Mistakes that Peg You as an Amateur Writer
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- čas přidán 16. 08. 2017
- Sometimes it's the little things that can make writing seem unprofessional. In this video I wanted to run through some relatively small writing mistakes that can make your writing seem amateur.
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2:08 "Naming the main character after yourself." Damn! Now I have to rewrite my entire autobiography!
XD
Ikr man! So rough
Hornyshark ...it was a joke, man
This was funny.
@Rich McGee True story but at least my main male character is an exaggerated version of myself so mine is just fine.
"How are you doing today?", she exulted. "I'm fine," he extolled. "That's nice," she professed.
*sigh
"I'm sorry," apologized Brom.
I'm afraid I used "vouchsafed" once...
"Mad!" vouchsafed Aqaar. "Completely bonkers!"
In French, we really try to vary. Using "dire" (say) too much is a sign that you're not a good writer.
That's interesting! Thanks for sharing this! :)
The overwhelming majority of these "do nots" have exceptions. The difference between an amateur writer and a professional is that a professional can pull off the exceptions, and make it work.
Gideon Kalve Jarvis well that's why this about amateur writers. You develop a style and such as you continue to write and discover your voice. But some of them are best avoided unless you're really good at it
Digby Dooright yeah.
I think it depends on the book I last read before I write.
Example- if read a book which was written in present tense before i write, I start to write like this, '"Time to go," she says, and leaves.' When usually I would write like this, '"Time to go," she said, and left.' I just need to avoid this mistake.
y e a
@Digby Dooright ... I don't even know what a verb is... The only reason i have high grades in english is because i pick what sounds best
Well, this was a "rule of thumb" type instructional, designed to help amateurs not come across as glaring amateurs.
He lifted his chin slowly then dropped it back to his chest
*when you're trying to reach that word count on an essay*
Just write random stuff then make it the same couple of the page of your using google docs
Alot of novels also have those kind of sentences too.
😝
“Taking time and care to think before he acted, he slowly lifted his head once more with a resolved expression. His eyes met mine stubbornly and purposefully.”
This is a pretty egregious example but like with all things in writing. Being overly descriptive can be used effectively. Off the top of my head I could see it being used to convey a sense of hyper awareness. Maybe the protagonist is paranoid or worried and the author wants you to get a sense of their state of mind.
Thank you for getting through 25 quickly. Some CZcamsrs would have just five in the same length video.
Editor knows how to cut out the cruft. Shocker.
I'm in the opposite boat, I'd have preferred she spend a lot more time exploring subjects
Makes for a video worthwhile.
Some subjects call for more elaboration
This is honestly so true, I follow 3 or 4 CZcamsrs that put out amazing content for writers but every video is often half-an-hour and filled with so much rambling. It's clearly unscripted, minimally edited, doesn't even have a list of talking points. I often find myself zoning out through all the constant rambling only to discover I missed something important buried in the video. I think this video could have been ab it better, I felt parts of it were too short, it felt like she was rushing to get through each topic and the stopping and starting with numeric cut-screens broke the immersion and became somewhat annoying but still this video was miles better than other popular writing CZcamsrs. at least she had a script or talking points, stuck to them, and did good editing.
''You should not have characters with similar spelled names''
*George R.R Martin: ''Hold my tea''*
Haha I thought of GRRM too
The 3 walders...
He does address this in an interview, his reasoning behind the choice is actually pretty interesting
@@ladygrey3636 Yeah it's kind of true with history, especially western European medieval history
Yeah no it's bad advice. English history is littered with Charlesand James and Georges and Richards and Henry's and Edward's.
"Don't describe every item of clothing every character is wearing."
*Reads American Psycho
Okay i had no idea there already were so many comments about that book, now mine feels useless...
American Psycho has A LOT of that kinda stuff in it, but it’s totally deliberate. Sentences will be repeated, lots of mundane yet wordy descriptions (think the business card scene from the movie.) totally bizarre things will happen and what’s his fuck doesn’t even react. It creates a very anxious read but it’s also all used for a reason.
Kinda like Nadsat in A Clockwork Orange. The book can be almost unreadable at times (especially your first time reading) but it was done deliberately to make the reader feel alienated.
@@RaeLovesGrimm000 Almost everything in that book is done 'for effect.' But it still gets tedious sometimes. We get almost zero description of the actual people, only what (or who) they're wearing.
The reason it works in American Psycho is because the protagonist greatly values these details. That's something that's often missing here. The descriptions should be written according to what the character would notice .Some academic professor wouldn't notice what shoes their student is wearing but some girly writer for a fashion magazine would.
GRR Martin is great at this. The chapters with young Arya are very simpel and confused. She isn't able to follow the conversation she's spying on so the reader doesn't get a clear understanding of what's being said either. However Cersei's chapters are filled with descriptions about subtle demeanour cues and verbal jabs that she particularly would notice or even overanalyse.
@@Jamesington That's the point. He doesn't care about the people themselves, just how expensive and fashionable their clothes are.
0:39 Spelling changes
0:51 Similar names
1:15 Mistakes in procedures with different professions
1:29 Mistakes in descriptions of medical problems, medical care, technology, weapons ~
1:41 Small talk in dialogue that doesn't mean anything ~
1:58 Forgetting to include sensory information
2:07 Naming the MC after yourself or a slight variation of your name
2:21 Cliches
2:34 Using the same sentence construction over and over
2:45 Switching between past and present tense unintentionally. (A rookie mistake of mine loool)
2:55 Pausing the story everytime a character is introduced
3:10 Overuse of alternative dialogue
3:36 Using more words than necessary
3:45 Thesaurus writing
3:54 Constantly repeating the character's name
4:10 Repeating the character's name in dialogue
4:26 repeating the same descriptions over and over
4:39 Switching the POV character at random
4:50 Including mundane details for no reason
5:03 Describing every article of clothing every character is wearing
5:18 Using an adverb plus a verb instead of just using a stronger verb.
5:28 Overly formal dialogue
5:43 Introducing too many characters at the same time
5:52 writing stage direction instead of action
Thankyou ❤️
@@AmourCafe You're welcome ♡
Thank you 😊
@@carmenhampton2946 You're welcome ♡ glad I could help ♡
@@kermitfroggie5334 You're welcome Kermie ♡ Have a wonderful day ♡
So Bilbo, Balin, Dwalin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Fíli, Kíli, Óin, Glóin, Ori, Dori, Nori, Thorin and Gandalf walk into a bar...
latronqui ...and it took me forever to tell them all apart.
Tolkien actually acknowledged how similar the names were when writing, and used the similarities for comedic effect!
Tolkien got those names from the Edda by Snorri Sturluson/ "snorris edda", so i guess you should blame norse mythology if anything haha :D
Aside from Bilbo Baggins, Thorin Oakenshield, and Gandalf, all the rest were just filler and everybody knows it. Nobody can tell the rest of them apart.
Sauron And Saruman are rallying armies to overthrow the forces of good...
"How you?" he say. "Me am good." she reply to he.
Lol
Lol
ayup
Yeah, this is how people talk, too
Laughing I am doing.
No seriously though, I laughed more than I should have at that! X'D
"You should not have characters with similar names, especially on the same side."
Tolkien: Laughing in Saruman and Sauron.
Master the rules before breaking them.
Or shank the rules with Rule Breaker.
*Rather, he laughs in Fingon, Fingolfin, Finarfin, Finwë and Finrod*
Tolkien was a master writer. This does not describe most people attempting to write.
Yeah I always confused these two.
Small talk in dialogue can be useful IF the characters are avoiding talking about something crucial.
Yeah
Haha procrastination goes brrrrrrrrr
yep. subtext
or, if it sets the character up. If the talk is something that Only that character would say/care about (just as an example) then it can be useful for setting tone. However, that should be used sparingly, as overusing small talk can go really good or really bad. For example pride and prejudice almost entirely relies on the undertones of small talk, but, at the same time, it isn't exactly small, because they are giving characterization and plot. All in all, it's 1 in the morning, and you should never write a sentence without meaning. Everything should advance some part of the book in some way.
Or are incredibly awkward in general, and you want them to actually seem like they barely have any idea how to have a conversation
"How are you Timmy?" Timmy excitedly asked.
"I am fine Tommy." Tommy excitedly would reply.
"You look sad Tummy!!!" Tommy exclaimed.
Tommy's face was elongated and brazen, yet had a faint air of reservedness about it. Tommy sat on his big round, brown, wooden, four-legged chair.
Today Tommy was going shopping for bananas, pears, apples, coconuts, shoes, socks, toothpaste, toilet paper, a brand new pen, a brand new folder, scissors, staples, oranges, a pen, a book, a comic and a nice new brown sweater.
Timmy lifted his arm up to his chin and then moved his chin toward his arm. Then he took three deep breathes in and then took three long breathes out. Then Timmy took three deep breathes in and took three deep breathes out. Then Tommy raised his arm into the air and walked two steps to the right. Outside was a horse. Tommy was feeling confused. He folded his arms. Timmy thought that Tommy must have not gone to work because Tommy knows that Timmy is a lawyer and Tommy's suit, which lawyers often wear, was still in the cupboard.
"I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit. I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark!"
danzigvssartre I cried...a flawless ending to a powerful story
Best thing ever
Bet this shit is published by now.
But what was the texture of the nice new brown sweater? Readers want to know that sort of thing!
Oh, and how's your sex life?
I'm dying omg
I have this strange desire to write a short story that somehow executes all of these problems at once.
I wonder if it's possible.
NatchEvil There's that fanfiction called My Immortal you might want to check out then, lmao
Link me, dude. My Immortal just gives me Evanescence.
In exchange I will link you to the infamous "Eye of Argon"
Edit: HA HA HA HA! Looks like My Immortal is linked in the Wikipedia entry for Eye of Argon! IT WAS MEANT TO BE!!!
What is this Eye of Argon?
Oh man. Here's the Wiki article. For the love of Dagon, look up and try to read this story Out Loud in front of friends without accidentally correcting spelling and grammar!
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Eye_of_Argon
I was just about to suggest My Immortal but it looks like someone already did. I'm pretty sure it hits every one of these things.
“He lifted his chin slowly, then dropped it back to his chest”
Annoying in writing but in an essay? Go for it, that extra few words for the word count is _crucial._
So true
Honestly when teachers ask their students a minimum word count is such a bad way of teaching writing. It encourages them to write filler nonsense and impedes their ability for synthetic thought.
I think it matters if the way they did it has a baring on the mood of the story or character, Boris, not yet certain on how to answer the question, lifted his chin slowly, and dropped it back to his chest.
I wholeheartedly support your hypothesis, evidenced by the measured nodding of my head north and south and by the approving smile adorning my face.
TLDR; “Agreed”
yeah about that, quick tip for anyone needing to hit that word count: instead of hitting the new paragraph button, fill the space with random words, then turn them white lol
//jk please don't try this
Another point to add: make sure each character has a role in the story. My biggest pet peeve (in regards to literature) are books about Mary Sue and her group of Uninteresting Friends whose only roles in the story are to *exist.*
Is this a Mary Sue
Strong because they had to adapt to they surroundings
Lots of bad things happen to them
Bubbly
brave when pushed
Sweet
Can be a strong leader when pushed
Most of the side characters are just existing but in the second book I really go into detail about them
Please answer
@@sugarlilylove6423 oh, sorry, I didn't realize you were asking me. I'd have to read your manuscript to tell, but from what you've said here, it can go either way. I'm no professional, but I always promote authenticity. As in, are your characters personable and lively, or do they feel 2-Dimensional rather than like real people? You don't need a complicated arc for each side character, but don't treat them like extras. Even though the emphasis is on your MC, your story will be better if you elaborate on the world around her.
As for the other things you listed, I wouldn't say so. Mary Sues are typically classified as 2-Dimensional characters who often fall into trope-y categories such as "the nerd" or "the music geek," and never seem to develop beyond one or two personality traits. As long as you're not utilizing the most cookie-cutter model of the normal-girl-gone-bad-ass-heroine trope, you're good to go. Again, authenticity! That's just my take, though, and trust me, I'm no John Green.
i think we gotta grow up past "mary sue" cause even the person who coined the term thinks people just misuse it for misogynistic purposes. "static characters" has always seemed to cause less confusion since that's actually a measurable term. plus it's clearly subjective and has no actual definition across the board, case and point: the replies before mine.
@@femalegays I probably wrote this comment when I was 15 and a bit uninformed. Completely agree with your points!
Based on some of these comments, I figure another bullet point should be "There's exceptions to every rule, but don't assume you are one." George RR Martin might have gotten away with ten Aegons, but don't push your luck with multiple Angies.
right, he got away with it because it made sense.
And he built a thousand years of history into Westeros
I can name quite a few book pr authors where they have some of these points, like #18 with repeated descriptors for characters like how specific characters on Harry Potter have specific descriptors to go with them.
William Faulkner's langorous prose comes to mind...
"Never mistake your Angies for Aegons." - GRR Martin
The clothing descriptions are the ones that kill me. I have so many manuscripts I review that will describe someone's clothing from head to toe in the middle of an action scene, even if it's a peripheral character. It makes me want to cry out to the heavens. But first let me tell you about my crimson blouse...
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. I KNOW exactly what you mean, and then I am just like, okaaay SO what happens next besides the tight skirt.
kristinmagoo Holy crap, that sounds tedious
but if he doesn't tell you about the Crimson Blouse, he won't have the dramatic reveal of the flesh wound that no one could see because the blood was hidden by the shirt... and don't get me started on the Coward in the Brown pants...
SpAcED_ OuT
This is why wattpad sucks. If you want fanfiction done right you go to AO3.
The very last point, "stage direction instead of action," is the bane of my existence.... omg. For some reason I feel compelled to write every single motion the characters make while in dialogue, especially where they are looking. "He looked up at her," "she turned back to him," "she took two steps away from him," "she looked toward this." It's like 1) I'm afraid to miss or let the reader imagine these things (that don't matter) for some reason, 2) somehow I get it in my head that the scene doesn't make sense unless I state their blocking, despite the fact I never see authors do this, and 3) I don't know how else to break up dialogue sometimes, especially when it's weighty, emotional, or one person is speaking for a long time, and I feel that it needs to slow down a bit to get the full impact. It's maddening because I know all this, but I don't really know how to fix it.
Same. But, at the same time, I wonder in my gen (Z) if it's more acceptable. We watch a lot more anime and film and I wonder if for us as an audience these sorts of descriptions hit better. I kinda like it, as long as it flows well and not excessive...or maybe it's bc I like writing like that XD
I just love having a really epic scene in my head with the character looking at the other *just so.* But yea, I do use "look" too much I think.
I mostly only do that during like intense scenes or fight scenes. Alot of my fight scenes include magick or powers of some sort which can come with specific hand motions and such. I feel confused as to if even need that or not as often as I do it at least.
@@aokayt9517 Might be, I like this kind of writing too. Not gen z, but still watch(ed) a lot of anime
Same. But early on in my writing I was told "give your characters action. Don't just let them stand there like statues."
I'm guilty of using "turn, tilted" for the viewpoint while avoiding looked as its a filter word, however from their eyes, other character's "look, see, turn, tilt" etc. One interesting variation if I'm using a sight action tag, I imagine a detail, even if it's small, that the character notices, and just state it, maybe follow it with a thought as there can be instances of long dialogue conversations, and it needs the right specifics to build something from it (whether it's chemistry in a romance scene, suspense in a tense scene like an argument, etc.)
"Don't give characters similar names."
Robert Jordan: Saerin, Sareitha, Siuan, Sarene, Sashalle, Seaine, Seonid, Sheriam, Serancha, Shermerin, Shevan, Sierin, Suana, and Silviana all sound like pretty good names.
Ssssssssss ! (Thinking of a specific scene in Dario Argento's "Suspiria"…)
O.O I WAS THINKING THAT
All those S names sound so similar, it drives me crazy
“Serancha”
Sriracha?
maybe harder when you have 2,500 names characters in your work.
"He let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding." -every ya book ever
Now I feel guilty, because I MUST have used this at a moment or another…
also every fucking fanfiction ever
Every What book ever?
@@jessicamaccabe9620 young adult
Guilty
You didn't mention expositional dialogue. That is the single biggest mistake I find in the work of new writers. Basically, you want to avoid having your characters describe concepts that they already understand in order to help your readers understand them.
"Hey, what's that you're drinking?"
"In this world we call this water. It is essential for our race to ingest this liquid regularly."
Nobody is every going to have that conversation. Let your readers figure it out on their own.
Your quote made me spit out my water irl
Mary found him in the kitchen.
"Hey, what's that you're drinking?"
she asked and dreaded the answer.
Carl glanced her way with resentment written all over his face. "In this world we call this water. It is essential for our race to ingest this liquid regularly."
She nodded and exhaled a breath.
I call that “sitcom first episode dialogue”
Xigor asked the human, “Hey, what’s that you’re drinking?” “In this world we call it water. It is essential for our race to ingest it regularly,” Adam said. Xigor flicked the air with his forked teeth in surprise and continued, “Is it composed of two oxygen atoms and hydrogen?” Adam nodded. “Filth. . . bring me cyanide.” Adam nearly choked on his water. “But that’s poisonous!” he said. Xigor rolled his eyes. “Not for us, you speciest human . . . “
Assume your readers have brains, basically
I never thought “said” and “asked” being constantly used was a good thing. I always thought readers would find it too repetitive.
I find using those for every dialogue tag is as jarring as using weird dialogue tags to avoid them. But now I'm afraid I'm doing it wrong, even though I never feel drawn to the tags when I'm reading my own stuff. Is it a bad thing to used dialogue tags to color tone and action when there's a specific tone or action you want to convey?
keltzy If this is something you really need an answer to for your writing, I'd recommend grabbing some books - either chose those as varied as possible, or if you are worried about a specific genre/theme/etc pick those - and read specifically for that.
Dissect conversations. Tally up tag use within conversations and between different types of conversations - e.g. relaxed, stressed, angry, bored, concerned, etc.
It may not actually answer your question, but at least it will give you a starting point.
Also, maybe read the conversations before you dissect them, so you know if it felt natural before you picked it apart.
You should use alternatives when you're trying to do something important with the text. Eg: if a character is having a breakdown, using something other than said makes sense, especially if the dialogue itself is mundane. If the dialogue itself can stand in its own and the reader gets a full sense of urgency or drama from the dialogue text alone, additional modifiers are unnecessary and just going to slow the reader down. In short, if the conversation itself is interesting, you don't need to spice it up with descriptors.
@@futuza I agree here. To put it simply, anytime I can avoid saying who is saying something based off the context of recent dialogue and actions and still make sense I do. Also you can use other surrounding characters to "x said" something to avoid overusing it for a main. Lastly I think there's nothing wrong with changing "said" to other things occasionally, such as remarked, laughed, snapped (etc to give clues to the characters' current mood), but unless you're intentionally trying to write a book in an older setting and have characters who were educated in such manners of speaking to give it credibility (and your book is aimed at a niche audience with an actual attention span), I would avoid any dialogue tag your average high school kid wouldn't be able to figure out because it just sounds pretentious if done wrong.
I agree to a certain point but this is technique that has been used for years and most of these tips seem more like dumbing down a book instead of writing it the way you choose! "I write the books I want to read not what the market wants!" Robert B. Parker
"The weather is nice today"
Wow you just exposed all the British people 😂
Lol
"Nice weather today."
"John, terrorists have taken over parliament, we have to do something!"
"Uh... Here's the newspaper, time for tea. Good morning!"
I think a major mistake you forgot to mention is objects and people relevant to the plot just appearing out of thin air the moment an author needs to use them.
If a jar is gonna fall and hit MC in the head - you need to establish previously that the jar is there.
This is good one! It's particularly annoying in who-done-it mysteries. The reader goes on guessing who among the 8 characters have committed the crime, only to be told that there is an mysterious 9th character and a lame, forced flashback behind him.
The phrase 'deus ex machina' comes to mind.
A Chekhov's Gun😉
THIS
THANK YOU
YES! Euron Greyjoy swimming alone to the island, right into the arms of Jamie Lannister! Come on!
**Lifts chin slowly then brings it back down towards my chest.**
@c_ait nodding
Bless you for mentioning sticking to a tense. I see that all the time in fan fiction and it drives me insane.
I'm saying! Out here having strokes trying to keep up!
Agreed, I used to do that all the time and it is so painful to read, I’m trying to improve. I do have a few questions, and it may sound a bit dumb, but is this acceptable or does it break the rule?
“He sprinted down the hill, thinking of how rich he was about to become.” I just made this up so it’s a weird sentence but is this switching of tenses wrong?
And then this one too?
“He had never been to a farm before but now he was there. He was so excited.” Does the use of now clash against the past tense?
@@firstnamelastname6016 I'm not an English scholar, but I don't think so. It grounds the sentence in the present of the past, if that makes any sense, but it's not switching tense overtly. It's more a gentle reminder that the character isn't experiencing things retroactively, even if the narrator explains it that way.
Nila Rowan thank you. I have always wondered this and I asked my teacher one time and he gave the classic answer that just answers a different question.
There is song in bollywood called Nila Nila o Nila Nila
I'm a little late to the party - by about five years, but I love the way Ellen gives examples of everything. So many 'writer help' videos tell you what to do (or what not to do), but seldom give examples of what they actually mean. Top marks, Ellen.
The unnecessary details part made me think about how a couple years ago I wondered why authors never have theirs characters go to the bathroom then I finally read a book that mentioned EVERY TIME the character went to the bathroom and I actually wanted to scream
SuperFoxdemon I need to know the title of this book
SuperFoxdemon what book?
Conservation of detail. Than again, sometimes it is warranted to just drag the story for a while.
Ugh
SuperFoxdemon we all want to know. Please don't disappoint. Book title plzzzz
Number 18, constantly repeating character descriptions. All I could think of was Dumbledore's youthful eyes behind his half moon spectacles
Stephen Willet To be fair, J.K. Rowling makes an outright hobby of beating readers over the head with character descriptions.
**internal screaming about Harry's scar, messy black hair and emerald green eyes being mentioned thirty million times but Ron's eye color only being mentioned in **_The Deathly Hallows_****
Stephen Willet this used to confuse me back when I first read Harry Potter. I'm not a native English speaker and was still pretty young at the time and I kept wondering if it was night time every time it mentioned "half-moon spectacles".
Also Count Olaf's shiny, shiny eyes
Nick P Oh lordy, who could forget that one. A HUNDRED. TIMES. PER. BOOK!!! 😂
"And his eyes shone very brightly, as if he were telling a joke"
No one
Literally no one
Me: let's replace this with fancy words
Fancheyyyy
"We need to spice up the writing with a few fAnCy words"
Amanda strolled about, chest fallen from the abhorrent news.
Like why did I do this
bro, I just have an exacerbated thesaurus. It's not my fault that I have a natural gift in vocabulary. And, it's not my fault that nobody can comprehend the magnitude of my remarks because, although I use somewhat common terms, their abundance and rapid succession can confound even the most competent of literary laymen. In other words: I like dem big words and I'm proud of it!
The editing on this was great. The list went by very quickly, leaving no time to get bored. No excessive point-making with unneccessary examples. Just quick and to the point. Very helpful, thank you.
Made a list of the things she brings up in case anyone wants to save it/be able to skim through it a bit quicker than listening to the whole video.
1. random spelling changes. for example changing the spelling of unusual names, spells, locations etc.
2. similar names. having similar characters with similar names, making it hard for the reader to distinguish between them.
3. mistakes in procedures regarding professions. for example police, social work, forensic work etc.
4. mistakes in description of for example medical procedures, use of technology, weapons, etc. do the research.
5. small talk in dialogue. small talk that takes up space but isn’t relevant to the story, doesn’t move it forwards, “page-filler.”
6. forgetting to include sensory information. sight, sound, scent, etc.
7. naming the main character after yourself/a different but similar version of your name.
8. using clichés. be original.
9. using similar/repetitive sentence structure over and over again. “He walked to the chair. He sat down in the chair. He crossed his legs. He smiled.”
10. switching between past and present tense unintentionally.
11. pausing the story every time a character is introduced by putting in a long physical description of the character. describe them briefly, then present them to the reader little by little.
12. overuse of alternative dialogue tags. for example whispered, mumbled, shouted, etc. “said” and “asked” should make up the majority of your dialogue tags.
13. using more than one or two adjectives to describe a noun. not needed and will almost always seem awkward.
14. using more words than are necessary. less is more.
15. thesaurus writing. always replacing words with bigger words.
16. constantly repeating the character’s name. “Abby walked over to the counter. Abby picked up the phone, she called her mom and Abby knew her mom was going to be mad.”
17. repeating characters' names in dialogue. “How are you today Ashley?” “I’m doing fine thanks, Tiffany.”
18. repeating the same descriptions over and over. for example describing a character’s eyes as shining emeralds 2, 5 or 20 times during the story. the reader will notice and it will seem awkward.
19. switching the point-of-view character at random. the point of view should change for a reason, not just arbitrarily.
20. including mundane details for no reason. for example letting the reader “watch” the character brush their teeth or get in the shower for no reason that moves the story forward.
21. describing every article of clothing every character is wearing at all times.
22. using an adverb + verb instead of just using a stronger verb. for example “he moved quickly” instead of “he jogged”.
23. overly formal dialogue. “How are you today, William?” “I am doing fine today, what about you?” “I have nothing to complain about.” doesn’t come across as natural speech.
24. introducing too many characters at the same time.
25. writing stage direction instead of action. “He sat down and crossed his right leg over his left leg. His right hand tapped on the back of the chair while his left hand scratched his head.” i.e. awkward/too detailed description of everything that's going on.
Wow, thank you!
Good, For Cliches, you can leave them there if the plot needs it, but there's also Subverting it, justifying it, averting it, deconstructioning it, etc.
TWA Honest opinions videos has said something about Cliches.
1. Find the cliche
2. What is the Cliche trying to communicate? (If the Cliche is needed, process to step 3.)
3. Either Keep the cliche, subvert it/Deconstruct it/etc, or replace it.
I like to tell about number 2 in easier words.
2(Easier meaning). What's the point and what purpose does the cliche serve?
3.
Thanks for this!
Thank you! I wish these things were always in the video bio
'Don't describe the same thing over and over again' made me instantly think of Cassandra Clare CONSTANTLY writing about how golden and pretty Jace is in The Mortal Instruments series. I felt like smashing my face into a wall, but I went with a constant eye roll instead. I'm surprised my eye balls didn't fall out, it's every other page...for SIX BOOKS
Catsandcamera Honestly I agree. I loved the Mortal Instruments but FOR CHRISTS SAKE I KNOW JACE IS A GOLDEN BOY WHO SHINES IN THE SUN I DO NOT CARE.
To be honest the whole Clary x Jace romance subplot was really boring to me, I was far more invested in the demon slaying than I was in how much Clary just looooooved Jace.
Catsandcamera that almost reminds me of Stephenie Meyer always talking about Edward Cullen's liquid gold/topaz eyes. Staphhhh
She also breaks another rule of making her character name close to her name. Cassandra clare...clary
Don't comic books do this, too? I mean, we have Peter Parker and yet we're fine with that name
@Mindy... Comics use alliterative names precisely to make them memorable (Stan Lee admits it's a personal crutch because he had a bad memory)... the issue of 'similar names' @Kat cited here is that the Author's last name is 'Clare" and their Heroine is named "Clary" (not unlike George Lucas naming his hero "Luke")
A few notes:
17: Names are often only used in Dialouge when introducing two people, Angry/Mad/Agitated, or calling for some one(“James, come quick!”)
21: Really only use clothing descriptions when it’s plot relevant or for characterization(The unconscious girl wore a floor length white dress. *later: Thomas asked the baker if she had heard of any weddings that had been canceled due to missing brides. AND Jackson wore a blue paw patrol onesie.)
22: Unless, the adverb contrasts the verb(He smiled sadly)
23: So long as it’s not every character you can use this as a way to distinguish between characters, especially if said character doesn’t know the main language well or is very formal compared to the rest of the bunch or has a thing for perfection
4:31 "If you describe the main character['s eyes]... two, five, or twenty times in the book... it's gonna be awkward" *cough cough* J.K. ROWLING WITH HARRY POTTER
Or us it as a plot point, where a golem is describing as having eyes like emeralds, then later in the story some thief disables the golem and steals the emeralds to sell. Next couple chapters are the golem's allies trying to recover them
That was a major thing though, the whole series was about him finding some connection to his family who died protecting him. It being all he had and peppered throughout was actually pretty brilliant in my opinion.
@@natashachenkov1850 I agree!
Pride and Prejudice, Elizabeth Bennett's eyes are called fine more than once and their food is described as well as period attire.
@celine yeah, and while it was an iteresting way to connect backstories, it became cliche and unbelievable. I'm a visual rememberer but even I can barely rememberer the exact details of all my loved ones' eyes on an average day and we live together. I find it hard to believe everyone who ever met Lily Pottercan remember her eyes of all things, exactly, 10+ years on.
It was a dark and stormy night...
It was a dark and stormy night. I couldnt see cause it was dark and stormy and night. I breathed shakily, uncomfortable to walk in the dark of night, during a storm
The storm raged on into the dark night. "Hey!" Braxon called to me. "What are you doing out here? It's storming." I sighed. "I don't like walking in the dark," i said into the night. The storm roared around us.
Cool line.
I think I might use that to start my first book.
@@TryptychUK it's already the first line in a book
@@wingingit7809 I know. I was being sarcastic. It is what is known as "purple prose".
It was a dark and stormy night. Our hero slowly turned his head left and then right surveying all he could not see. There was no doubt that the sun had set and a darkness like this could only be vanquished by dawn. The precipitation pelted the hero as he squatted in the abysmal darkness without light listening to the storm, but not hearing the sound he sought among the banshee like wails of the wild wind. Mael Storm, victim of darkness and gale, finally spoke aloud, but unheard among the unearthly cries of the night tempest: "I hate this damp weather."
I once co-wrote a "story" with someone and it was the worst choice of my life. I'm no expert writer, and I make a lot of the mistakes in the video, but this person was so oblivious to the fact it wasn't good writing. They'd switch from first to third person, use bland dialogue and descriptions. No commas anywhere, just short, choppy sentences over and over. And they'd constantly switch between the two characters perspectives. Kinda went a bit like this.
'I walked over to my husband. He was sitting in a chair. He looked up at me. "Hi honey." He said. He smiled. Hazel smiled back. "Hi honey." She said back. I stood up. I walked over to the door. "Anything you need honey. I'm getting milk" I asked. My wife shook her head. "No." She said. I nodded to her. John opened the door and left. He walked down the street. He went to get milk.'
(Don't know if this is annoying to anyone else, but writing with them and trying to fit there way of writing as not to offend them made me feel horrible about what I was writing)
Ditto, but it was a lot of fun despite the fact that I want to burn all of it forever because it shouldn't exist.
I went "wHAT THE FUCK" after reading the part where she goes "I asked" 💀💀💀💀
I hate it when it suddenly changes perspective ㅠㅠ I get a headache reading it
it's literary picasso
@@mattbeyer1387 That's a good way to describe that.
Why do I suddenly feel like making a novel with all these mistakes in them.
Funny story... I mention my main character's eyes a bunch of times through the books. He's got orange/ember eyes. Still, my BF couldn't tell me after he finished the book, what eye colour the MC had. XD
Funny thing, one of my main antagonist has ember eyes.
Your BF didn't actually read the book
@@wms72 He lives with me, he read each chapter and gave feedback as I wrote them, so yes, he did. Did you feel accomplished writing this needless comment of yours?
Oof, Welp I’ve now just realised how lonely I actually am...
That's another thing you shouldn't do, use abbreviations.
"Don't just guess, do the research." It's funny to me that you bring this up, because television series do this CONSTANTLY, and it turns me off of a lot of shows.
Bt… But… If tee-vee sez it's so, then it's DE TRUTH ! Criminologists can take a twenty yars old hair, look at it and tell you what its owner had for dinner from his teens onward !
Always do the research...just remember the rule of cool (and sometimes the rule of 'don't give people ideas for bad things') may be perfectly valid depending on your setting and/or audience. I've researched far more that's ended up never being used (or being edited out), than I've researched and used with 100% accuracy.
The only time major research on topics is an exception is when you’re making a completely new world, new dimension almost. Even then though, you’re still gonna need research because you need a basic outline of certain parts in real life so you can tweak them to fit your dimension. Like for example, in aliened dimensions, it’s a new concept! But human research is still crucial. Though, that is mostly if you’re choosing to get into a specific area, profession, topic, etc. If it’s shaping everything, buildings, natural biomes, plants, etc. into something new for an adventure, then go wild!
@Christoper Putt What do you mean? There is no movie of Avatar: The Last Airbender. *wink wink*
Most of them have field experienced technical advisors, but technically correct television is not the same thing as interesting television, so the writers don't always listen. Good writers will often hang a lampshade for the audience to let them know that certain inaccuracies were deemed necessary. Abby from NCIS did this often, telling Gibbs how long something takes in the real world before miraculously doing it in TV time so the plot can advance. Anything that obscures a character's face will be forgotten or removed as quickly as possible, because the audience needs to see their faces more than they need accuracy. But there's still no excuse for characters in police/medical shows not wearing GLOVES!
Lol "Don't name the main character after yourself"
Cassandra Clare -> Clary
Cassandra Clare is a pseudonym. Her real name is Judith.
Bob the Builder Cassie Clare’s real name isn’t that though. It’s not even close.
What if it’s an autobiography??
@@charlie.cummings It's a name she chose for herself, and then chose to name her main character. Thus she named her character after herself, which is weird.
Karl-Ove Knausgaard obviously didn't get the memo!
It’s crazy how much better your channel is than any other writing channel. Your videos have improved my writing so much! Thank you so much 😊
Right. She actually studies this stuff professionally & critically instead of just regurgitating the same, tired "tips" everybody got from Reader's Digest
“You shouldn’t have characters with similar names”
*S.E. Hinten restrains Darry and Dally as they go to attack*
Yeah but dont they call Dally, Dallas sometimes?
Dallas and Darrel are still kind of similar, anyway, but those are nicknames. One of my all time favs tho.
One of my favorite books! Thanks for bringing that up!
DUDE I ALWAYS MIXED THEM UP YET EVERYONE AROUND ME SOMEHOW KNEW WHOS WHO ??¿?¿
I definitely agree with this list, but I think writers should keep in mind that they can make exceptions to these rules depending on their intentions (and skill/talent)
For example, in Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte, all of the characters have very similar names, and the same 3-4 names (Catherine, Heathcliff, Earnshaw, etc.) Are repeated over and over with different characters. This is not a bad thing though, because it adds to the incredibly claustrophobic atmosphere of the novel and the isolation caused by the limited number of people.
A character's boring everyday routines could also be described to establish a sense of mundanity and repetitiveness early on in the book, if that is something a writer wanted to do.
I think basically while a lot of these are "rules" that really should always apply, some of them are just things that should only be used deliberately (and very sparingly) to create a specific desired effect, such as in the above examples.
I agree, "stage-direction" or writing a play by play of seemingly innocuous actions can give insight to the character's frame of mind/mental state.
I still agree with avoiding similar sounding names. Even if they are a famous author, if the names sound too similar I get confused about who is actually doing what and I eventually just loose interest. But I also just struggle with remembering names to begin with so it's just adding a level of difficulty that is unnecessary. Simply be more creative with your naming. Unless its part of the plot that they have similar names such as twins or a society where uniqueness is frowned upon.
I'm reading American Psycho right now. The first thoughts the main character has whenever he sees someone else are to describe in great detail what they're wearing and where it's from. It's jarring and crazy, and I think a good example of intentionally breaking the rules.
@@ethanwilson9406 Many big authors have said there are no rules. All the biggest hits have broken the rules and created their own mold.
@@caitlincurry9213 Of course, but who knows how many 'rules' and conventions their stories fit within. Break the rules with purpose, but don't go overboard.
I don't even want the main character's eyes to be described as shining emeralds once!
But what if the main character's eyes are really, truly, literally shining emeralds??? 🙃
So here's my thoughts: You can do it once, key word, ONCE, to accent a romantic moment to highlight someone's beauty in a descriptive way to set the moment. But in casual conversation or in any context that's not trying to make a character just that much more appealing to suit an actual need of some kind, you just might be dealing with a Mary Sue.
Hailey Hudson
What if they are literally shining emeralds?
what if you call them emerald eyes to irritate them?
Hailey Hudson phew! Good thing it's my side characters with the shining emerald eyes. That was a close one.
Watching this video multiple times is a great way of internalizing writing do’s and don’t’s. Same can be said of other literary guides/essays, but it bears mentioning for the sake of disciplined craftsmanship. 🙂
"Number 21 is describing every article of clothing every character is wearing at all times."
Bret Easton Ellis: 'Hold my business card.'
YES! Hated American psycho, not only for that reason though
@@user-bp5dh7ii7e loved American Psycho, for partially that reason
kinda the point of american psycho, no? excess commercialism and materialism and all.
Anne Rice does it a lot too, especially in her early books (and, in my opinion, her best). She tends to describe what Lestat is wearing in vivid detail, sometimes for paragraphs at a time.
The problem is that this video is only for beginner writers who are learning to write. More advanced writers who have developed a certain style will break some of these rules and it's perfectly okay. If everyone wrote the exact same, books would be boring. Style gives personality to your works. Stephen King, for instance, breaks a lot of these rules. JRR Tolkien, JK Rowling, and other famous writers also have broken some of these. It's not because they're beginners, it's because they have a particular style that they've developed.
Also, a lot of these issues are usually fixable in a second draft. You really shouldn't be worried about the exact wording of things until you have an actual draft of your book.
In fact, King says to forget the rules. They are good guides, but they aren't the law.
@@MewCat100
*Barbossa:* [...] the code is more what you'd call "guidelines" than actual rules. Welcome aboard the Black Pearl, Miss Turner!
Rachel Knodel granted! But you have to master the rules, before you can break them 😉
Rachel Knodel How is that a problem? She makes it very clear that the target audience for this are beginners trying to get published. Not every piece of advice is for everyone, and that‘s not a problem, that‘s just how the world works.
Also a heavy reliance on epithets. It's fine when you don't want to constantly repeat a character's name, yet still differentiate them from other characters, but it sounds pretty contrived when used like this:
_The woman_ glanced at _the green-eyed teen_ , worrying her lip.
"What do you think?" she asked _the girl_ , who looked up from her phone, startled by _the brunette's_ sudden inquiry. She slowly met the gaze of _the older female_ , and then the placid stare of the _freckled boy_ .
... The only case I could think of that excuses this is one where the character's names are not yet revealed. But this is unnecessary if the reader already knows the names of the characters.
Oh my god, I _hate_ it when characters are referred to by hair color. I only really see it in fanfic, but it sticks out every time and pulls me out of the story.
Michelle Li, you just nailed it on the head for me. These sins in writing are all present in fanfiction. -shudders-
Oh my Gosh yes descriptions like ‘the redhead’, ‘the nurse’ and ‘the older woman’ always make me cringe so hard. They always read like bad fan fiction.
YES, this gets me every time. I see it a lot in fan fiction. I just can't read it, the cringe is too strong.
Omg! I never knew the technical term for this, but I hate it! Thanks, now I know the terminology.
Reading Wuthering Heights was such a chore because of all the similar names - Heathcliff, Hareton, Hindley, Catherine, Catherine, Edgar Linton, Linton Heathcliff.
Also you CAN have similar names and have the book still work. I mean, A Song of Ice and Fire has so many characters named Robert, Brandon, or Walder, but it still works okay.
Were there legit two Catherines or was that a typo?
So in my story, Vastemorians are grounders who have obsession with letter V and considered it special. Each district of Vastemoria have their own Valkyrie that rule them. Vishnasamir, Viezeal, Vexandra, Vandiril, Vai Lee, Vuinevere, and Violette. (and Lord Vryleus, and anotherplace named Vyenialle) I tried so hard to make their names distinguishable even if they all start with letter V. I don't know of it's working.
These tips make wonder if Ellen has read "My Immortal" recently, because this is also a list of things that happen in that story X)
nahhh ellens too preppy to read my immortal 🤪
"When you learn how to write your teachers all tell you 'don't just use 'he said' after dialogue. The second you start writing for yourself you throw that "advice" out the window," he said. "But isn't the weather nice today?"
This video was made with amateur writers as the focal audience so I think it would have been nice for you to give examples of how to fix the problems as well as giving examples of the problem. Other than that this video was super helpful. Thank you! 😊
Great loved it. Great tips. I have been writing my book off and on for 8 years now and the experience has been educational in itself. I have now professionals tearing it up while strongly encouraging me to finally finish. Writing takes time, and editing and re-editing is a process, but like a good painting I hope it is something to eventually be proud of. Thank you again.
About describing a character, and not immediately describing every aspect of how they look right as they’re being introduced: I’d recommend writing down exactly what your characters look like (eye colour, build, hairstyle, facial features ect, go as detailed as you’d like) in another document or notes somewhere to keep track of your descriptions and make sure it’s coherent, and so that no character just randomly changes eye colour halfway through the book. I personally draw all my characters before I write anything, since I’m big into visual art. Works a charm in really helping you picture your characters.
Then, when you’re actually writing, drop a few indications to what your characters look like immediately. What are their most noticeable features? What would be the first thing someone noticed about them when seeing them for the first time, and what in their looks sets them aside from the rest of the cast and is worthy to bring up immediately? Do they have particularly striking hair, or dress a certain way? Or it something else that is striking about them, like do they have a particular strong smell (perfume, body spray, just stinky, ect) or something of the sort?
Then, when moving further into the story, you’re still probably gonna have details about your characters appearances that you want to put some attention to. You could continue to describe their appearance though their actions, like describing a character’s hair if they’re putting it into a ponytail or the way their body looks as they walk or move.
Then, my favourite part, is talking about the more subtle details of your characters. Stuff like eye colours, certain small gestures and mannerisms, skin details or other similar stuff. These works best when reserved for more intimate moments, like a character for the first time paying attention to another character’s eye colour when they hold eye contact for a bit longer during a soft conversation, or pointing out their freckles for the first time after they fell asleep in their lap. It’s moments like that that can help further convince the readers that the characters are actually getting to know each other, and really gives us these sweet intimate moments (familiar, platonic, romantic or sexual. It works for all), plus it gives you the satisfaction to have your readers knowing what your character looks like without boring them with info dumping about it in the first 5 minutes. It’s a win win win for everyone involved!
"He lefted his chin slowly and then dropped it back to his chest"
that was too funny. thanks for the tips
Some guy named Stephen King said writing can be learned but it can't be taught which I believe simply means there is no exact formula to writing and you can disobey all these tips and those you learned in school and still be on the new york best seller list!
West Pro Gamer THANK YOU 👏
@ArronZ M. Read the comments below and find a lot who do.
Well... if you disobey all of these, you're going to have a very hard time. I would at least find three to stick with. XD
You've to know the rules in order to break the rules. Amateurs often need luck on their side to get away with broken rules, but professionals know how to break them effectively.
I know an exception to almost every point and the books have always made it onto the bestseller lists
Ellen: pausing the story to write a big description.
Victor Hugo: hold my tea
Huggy isn't exactly going to jot a doorstopper exercising brevity, is he?
I’m forty years old and listening to a ginger high school student explain the reasons I’m an amateur.
That’s the biggest reason I’m an amateur.
Haha!
*"He lifted his chin slowly and then dropped it back to his chest"*
- He nodded
GreenFlashAtSunsetッ funny thing is, reading the first I picture the action: I prefer it. The second is more like an abstract concept.
#26 feel free to break these rules at any time.
"His muscle on his face, on the cheek specifically is contracted upward and shaped his lip convex"
-He smile
Nr. 18, Shades of Grey:
"More wine?" Christian asks, _gray eyes_ glowing.
His burning _gray eyes_ gaze at me.
His _gray eyes_ blaze with excitement.
His _gray eyes_ are alight with curiosity.
I whisper, staring up into soft _gray eyes_
His _gray eyes_ blaze with speculation.
He glances up, his unfathomable _gray eyes_ bright, his expression unreadable.
His _gray eyes_ implore, and I know he speaks the truth.
I visualize the wicked gleam in his _gray eyes_
@Le Wats 50 Shades of Shade
Something tells me that guy *might* have gray eyes… (Yes, I''ll get mee coat…)
Grey eyes and the present tense -- I'm out.
this is hilarious xD
You forgot that she bit her lip 20 times in that scene.
Thanks Ellen! Just starting out crafting my very first novell, so these tips were very helpfull. Keep up the good work!
As an editor, number 2 made me so happy. You would not believe how many people use names that look and/or sound so similar that I can’t tell them apart at all. It makes me reject titles so fast my head could spin, if I can’t tell who the MC is in a group with little effort, neither can the audience.
Do you think Vryleus, Vishnasamir, Violette, Viezeal, Vai Lee, Vexandra, Vandiril, and Vuinevere sounds the same? I tried so hard to make their names distinguishable despite all starts with V.
@@user-ym1zs8sd2y Viezeal and Via Lee could become confusing because how similarly they start but it would greatly depend on how they are written. But when I worked in Publishing that wouldn't have been an instant rejection for me as they feel more like how the Charmed sisters all have P names
I was intimidated by the title of this video, expecting to hear you point out a list of faults I was committing in my novel. I feel like I passed a test with flying colors as I make some of these mistakes minimally at most. My confidence soars! Lol. Thanks for the great video. I'm very happy to have found this channel.
Thats actually not good. Most of these are not mistakes unless overused. In fact a work without them will come across as suparficial.
I suppose that can still work if it focuses in the macro scale of events ala Foundation.
@@ineednochannelyoutube5384 I wouldn't agree. I think you can break all these "rules" if you do it intentionally and with thought behind it. But if you do these things unknowingly or all the time, it's definitely not good. So, if a beginner doesn't do these things more than a little, it's a good thing.
Refreshing to see an editor making these types of videos and not an author or aspiring author. Good content, thank you
IS THAT HOUSE OF LEAVES I SEE IN THE BACKGROUND?
you're now my favorite person thank you
favorite book of all time.
Dude the fact that she only spent a few seconds explaining each tip is sooo nice!~ Her video was super helpful, and I didn’t have to try to keep myself awake the entire time. :/
21: American Psycho did this to show the microscopic detail Bateman saw the world in. He did it, because he was superficial. Characters were only ever described by their clothing. It also showed his grip on reality slipping (like when he mentions he's wearing glasses by Oliver Peoples three times in one scene. It added to the characterisation.
It was very effective for that book
In the shower, I use an Almond-Mint face mask followed by an exfoliating gel scrub. Then an anti aging eye balm followed by a protective face mask with little to no alcohol because alcohol drys out your skin.
SquattingNeville the amount of intense descriptive detail in that book is so effective to bateman’s character
Ugh. American Phsyco was a disturbing movie
Thats true but i think one should not confuse absolute beginners with the millions of detailed exceptions, the masters brought to perfection
I have to disagree. Mundane details do work in certain stories. Tolkien would write almost two page descriptions of meals, I was honestly jealous of those Hobbits and their second breakfast.
Kings Advisor
And its not like he never had tons of interesting stuff he could of added in. The Curse of Mandos for one. Or what Gandalf really was. He went on and on about mundane details because it off set the fantastical elements. We follow the fellowship through the snow as they dig with their hands and carry the hobbits etc. Its all prep for the Balrog. The same with Glorfindel, the chap goes on and on about adjusting saddle straps, he doesn’t say, oh by the way I fought a Balrog in a duel a long time ago. Mundane details matter. In my opinion Tolkein used the techniques of realism to solidify the magical elements of his stories. Before we go with Bilbo to meet Smaug the magnificent we first have to wade through a whole chapter on the positioning of ponies. Tolkein prepares the readers mind to absorb the fantastical elements with preceding mundane detail.
It's not only Tolkien. All great literature I know comes alive in the mundane (salad)
Kings Advisor BEGINNERS.
What about that don't you understand???
Tolkien was one of the greatest writers in the past century. He spent literal decades on his works. THIS VIDEO WAS NOT INTENDED FOR HIM OR WRITERS OF HIS CALIBER, IT IS FOR JANE DOE WHO WANTS TO GET HER FIRST NOVEL PUBLISHED!
I kinda feel a lot of people are just trying to seem smart in the comments, this video is about how to look *professional* . Not the absolute commandments in how you have to write to be able to make a book popular.
So I think "Mundane details do work in certain stories" is not really in disagreement with the video, cause she never claimed they didn't.
Just that you're not going to be wowing anyone with a 5 page description of how someone made a cup of coffee at the start of you're opus, you probably won't find any publisher that will be willing to spend the 30-60 mins it would take to see if there is anything there when the first 5 pages are so awful.
Remember, JK Rowling was turned down by 12 publishers before she got one that accepted her book. Many other writers have had their first, second, and even third book turned down before they get one released and wind up a best seller.
Unless you're going to self-publish you're not going to be doing well if you write like an amateur. But if you're already a known author you can skip any rules you feel like, as long as you're writing a good book, but if you're a fledgling writer you *should* listen to those rules and follow them, cause you're going to need luck to get published in the first place even if you're brilliant, no need to make it harder for yourself.
my mouth legit would water at his descriptions, same thing with JK Rowling. That dining hall smells so good probably.
A lot of good points. With the naming a character after oneself, the main character in one of my series is named Max because I had a teacher in school who always called me Max instead of Matt throughout the entire school year. I thought it was funny, but it also had a story to it that I liked and became the MC's story: some people will see you how they want to see you, not how you truly are. I hope it's not too big of a red flag, but it does have an actual purpose that's central to the story and the character's arc.
I like it how your video is just 6 minute long and has more than 10 tips that were easily explained. A great video before I sleep.
A very good list, but it needs a corollary:
"...unless it works in the story."
it does state "amateur writer"... being an amateur you're less likely to Know whether it truly works in the story... a good editor, or even an objective friend giving it a read through... I dated a Girl who fancied herself a writer... the booty was good, her writing was actively Painful...but 90% of the problems (with her writing) could be summed up with "how does this Serve the story?"
+Tim Janssen Being an amature writer you shouldnt constrain yourself from using harder techniques because you will never learn.
Besides, Im not a writer at all, and I still believe I can point out when the detail in a scene serves a particular porpouse and when its juat there as bad habit.
I'm kind of annoyed how many of the comments are in this vein. I'd say the #1 rule of writing is: "to break the rules, you have to know the rules". tropes are tools and not evil, the most stale trope can be amazing writing if the writer has mastered the trope and twists it on its head. many plot twists wouldn't work if the audience didn't have expectations from stereotypes
+pheela Nobody was talking about tropes. We were talking about attempting to create art based on rules. That is not possible.
Unrelated but I’m dying rn trying to pronounce the word corollary out loud
Funny how many fan fiction sites have these issues with their content.
but fanfiction is a good place for amateur writers to learn what works and what doesn't work in writing. Yes it can be extremely annoying to read the pieces but the only way you can improve at writing is by writing
i once wrote an ENTIRE novel about scuba diving and marine biology, but i had never ONCE actually researched it, i was so confused when i started editing on why the novel felt like it wasn’t working out, took a step back for a few months, came back and i was like oHhhhhhh... oops!
1:53 Gosh, I read a traditionnally published book that had, among other problems, characters constantly saying "hello". New character comes into the scene? Better have all the other say one after the other how happy they are to see him!
In general, that book was so amateur that I'm still wondering who in their right mind would invest money into it, and how it got popular enought to be in a library! It had a lazy parallel world, a non-sensical magic system, a 14 years-old mary sue and her 20 years-old love interest, her friend who was only there to tell her how awesome she was, the good old "hero is related to mcbaddie" and perhaps most shockingly of all: blatanly false science for anyone that passed high school.
i would so read that tho
@@athalia6062 It's in french.
@Timotei Andria Je ne m'en souviens plus, (mal?)heureusement. Ça doit faire un an maintenant depuis que j'ai lu le premier livre.
Oof, definitely wouldn’t read that...
I like *✨Horror✨*
So many of these are my fan fiction pet peeves
Inami B. Mine is when people write 'the elder/older' or 'the younger' instead of 'the older man/woman' or 'the younger man/woman'. It makes me think 'the older what? Potato? Dog? What?' and smacks of lazy writing, imho.
The older/younger aren't nouns in English? :0 At least in other languages, older and younger aren't just adjectives but also can be used as nouns. Not that it makes this particular case better, it still sounds awkward as heck, but it's not actually missing a word. Weird that English doesn't have that ._. The more you know, I guess :D
HaichaoTeaLover Well... "elder" and "young" can be both adjectives and nouns, yes. But they tend to sound strange as nouns, since they're not usually used as such, especially in modern writing. "Elder" is used much more commonly used as a noun than "young," though.
There is a trick to writing "elder" and "young", especially for siblings and when you don't want to write the name all the time. There's elder, eldest, younger, and youngest. But we can also add numbers in front of the elder and younger names, like "second eldest", "second younger", and so on. Creature names can come in handy, too. Plus it makes it easier on the eyes and gives a fresh new perspective to the story you're writing.
Oh, that's right!! I'd forgotten. Good point, thank you for giving those examples. Those are great ways to use them as nouns.
I am SO GLAD you mentioned dialogue tags. I have had English teachers and professors outlaw the use of “said” to push students to use alternate words. It’s a shame because students want to improve, but they are being told to focus on the wrong things. Using a different (and often extravagant) tag each time is so distracting.
“Don’t name the main character after yourself or a slight variation of your name”
Victoria schwab: 🤭🤭🤭
The "said" and "asked" point actually surprised me a bit, because when I was in school any students that kept using "said" when writing a story (including me) were criticized by the teacher for doing that, and were always told, "Don't keep using the word 'said.'"
Another thing that you notice with unexperienced writers, especially in Fantasy, is that the names have no concept. They are often just a bunch of syllables that sound cool together. Or they don't fit into the time they're set in. Good fantasy authors have some sort of concept to their names. George R.R. Martin for example uses normal names and changes them slightly, either in spelling or the name itself: Edward=Eddard; John=Jon; Caitlin=Catelyn; Benjamin=Benjen etc. also different cultures have different names, e.g. the Targaryens often have the ae in the names: Daenerys, Aegon, Aemon, Aerys, Jahaerys, Daemon.
I've found that a good way to make names sound realistic are to base them on names that already exist (ancient gods and variations thereof work well), or to think about what culture a fantasy world has, what differences in culture and language between the characters would exist. Their names would have to reflect that.
Another example for this is Lord of the Rings. Dwarfs have short names, one or two syllables with precise sounds and a consonant between each syllable: Du-rin, Gim-li, Ba-lin, Bom-bur, Ki-li, Gloin
while Elves have long elaborate names that sound delicate with syllables that are both vowels that you speak: Ga-la-dri-el, Thran-du-il, Ce-le-born
Fortunately for us, Martin is a history buff, and a lot of those spellings can be found in historical manuscripts, either because spellings weren't standardised or simply because they were regional variants on the name.
Take John, for example: John, Jon, Jean, Yohn, Ioan, Iwan, Ewan, Ivan... all the same name.
He also knows some of the lesser-studied myths as he named Bran - that means 'raven' in Welsh, and is linked to Bran and Branwen from the Mabinogion. That story is also a mythical source (though not the only one) for birds being taught to speak and taking messages.
Another good example is the last airbender. In the fire nation everyone in the the royal family has a z in their name ex. Zuko, azula, sozin
This is exactly the path I took in my writing, that is, basing names off of real world names. I modeled the cultures in my world off of real world regions and drew names from those cultures for the characters that came from those regions.
An example, many of my characters come from a kingdom that is modeled after a blend of Roman and Greek, so I use Latin names for cities, and Latin and Green names. In the area I modeled after the Norse/Scandinavian, I use names that pull from Danish, Swedish, German, etc.
Not only does it make naming a LOT easier, it lends a believability to the names and places that help my readers understand where in the world a place is or a character is from. Strongly defined cultures in each region help set expectations, which comes in handy when I want to throw a curveball.
This is what drove me crazy about Dune. Its a bunch of nonsense fantasy names and then a random "paul" and "jessica"
I don't understand how some things get published 🤦♀️
As a corrolary to your "don't overuse the character's name" rule, there's also the... I don't know what to call it, but the "The Redhead" thing, where writers try to avoid using the character's name and come up with things like "Trud threw a rock at Gingerina. The redhead ducked. He walked closer to the red-haired girl. The flame-haired woman backed away." No. That forces way more mental processing on the reader and makes the scene slower to read and parse. Use pronouns unless there are (for example) multiple "she"s present and it would confuse the scene, in which case, honestly, just use their names and/or vary how you're describing the action.
Additionally, if you call her "the redhead" I would naturally expect that particular description to be relevant. ("Blonde girls are totally hottest!" said Trud. "I see," said the redhead.)
Suitov with all those epiphets I'm not sure if he's attacking a woman with red hair or a mythical fire creature.
It's also because it's incredibly distancing. If we know these characters well, it's jarring to have them referred to as if this is the first time we've ever seen them. It removes all connection.
That example was hilarious😂😂
Excellent content. The other benefit to people aside from learning something new and a good reminder if they already knew is reaffirming what someone may have “felt” or suspected was a no-no but wasn’t 100% sure.
Helpful and memorable. Thank you 🙏🏼
This is a really good list. I both like that you didn't hang around with any point too long, even though it was a bit jarring. I am so used to forgetting the last point by the time the next one starts because it takes several minutes for them to wrap up each point. This was a lot more informative and easier to digest.
“Nicely done,” he said with sincerity.
"Don't name your characters after yourself."
Jane Austen... with Jane Bennet... the most beautiful and kind Bennet sister!
To be fair, about 50% of women and girls were named Jane at the time LOL
Fyodor Dostoyevsky is guilty of that one. He had a son called Alyosha who died very young and he felt like a useless father because of it. What's the name of the hero in one of his novels? Alyosha. What's the name of the terrible father? Fyodor. I suppose there's a difference between writing to live a 'fantasy' and using names for symbolism.
Yeah, no. Jane Austen herself said that she identified most with Lydia in the book and you can tell when you read „Persuasion“, which is the most autobiographical of her books.
I think naming characters after yourself or similar like yourself is not bad writing per se, it is more of a warning sign for possibly bad writing, since amateur writers who write cheesy wish-fulfilling self insert stories do this most commonly. If your story is nothing like that, there is no real problem with a character name similar to yours, but you probably shouldn't do it as a newbie author trying to get a manuscript sold to a publisher, because it might potentially make him throw your manuscript into the trash can without reading more than the first page.
I'm not sure if this counts but
My first name is Mark. My main character's name is Lark (His initials are LRF) while mine is (MTA).
Kindly let me know if there's a problem with it.
Dear Ellen, I can't thank you enough for your very helpful videos. I've read many books on the art of the novel, but they were all alike. When you finish reading them, they leave you with many questions unanswered concerning important things related to fiction writing. They say much to mean little, whereas you say so much useful and helpful things in just a few minutes. Again thank you so much.
For some of the new writing folks in the comment section; just know that once you get more seasoned at this, these rules can be bent and sometimes outright broken without causing a fuss. Sometimes you NEED a character to speak without contractions. Gives a more stuffy or robotic feel to that *1* character's speech. Sometimes a character is speaking like a dolt and you need to use adverbs with verbs instead of stronger verbs, or reuse a word, or maybe there's a character that tries to talk intellectually and uses every synonym he can think of to sound superior. Even a cliché can be used to great effect.
Too much rule breaking can, however, leave your story in shambles. It's like learning how to cook something; once you have a handle on how the food and seasonings go together, you can experiment and try altering the recipe. Personally, I've found that omitting details more often and merely alluding to them can be potent. It leaves room for the readers to imagine parts of the scenery, or character's appearance, or the spookiness in something. Less is more.
If you really have to show people *precisely* how a character looks, then I suggest picking up art and drawing your character. You might even find that after you've done this a few times, there were minutiae about them that weren't necessary to begin with.
I think you're right, that her rules apply to overuse.
That if a character is intended to sound stuffy, then always write that character's dialogue this way. But don't let that bleed into the other characters without good reason.
If someone who knew me, wrote dialogue for me, I would expect an overuse of big words. I read so much 19th century literature when I was a kid, that I can't help but let many of those words spill out as an adult.
No. 18 ‘Repeating the same descriptions over and over’ is the favourite of J.K.Rowling.
You are not J.K. Rowling.
@@violetverdict3760 Neither are you, why is that even relevant?
I had to stop reading _Blackwood Farm_ by Anne Rice because her exhaustive descriptions of things like the kitchen tiles in the main character’s childhood home were killing me.
@@damian_madmansnest Because we are not J.K. Rowling. I remind people of this frequently as it can be very difficult to keep track of, especially when there is a deficit of mirrors in your local vicinity.
I, for one, thank them for the reminder as I was just about to retcon an entire novel with a tweet.
@@allihavearepasta-basedthou2890 So… We are not J.K.Rowling, therefore we should not try to imitate the best, but rather follow standard rules in order to write unassuming novels…
Not only is the one of the SINGLE MOST INFORMATIVE VIDS I have ever seen, but it’s also hilariously funny! Great work, Ellen!
Rule #1 -> Rules are made to be broken
Rule #2 -> Before strictly sticking to any list of rules, refer to Rule #1
Exactly and couldn't agree more. I am more inclined to take advice from a published author rather than a youtuber who put their work out there to be published! Always follow rule number 1 because writing is about what you want not to appease the masses!!!
There are reasons why rules exist. People who understand why rules exist and have experience with them can descide when to break them.
But that doesn't invalidate the rules.
@@marcad8266 Well it has "amateur writer" in the title, so it's pretty clearly directed at people with little experience.
I agree that strict adherence to them will hold a writer back, because it would prevent them from using their full potential.
But an inexperienced writer isn't using their full potential anyways, and is better served with some advice against pitfalls, even if that restricts their "toolkit".
Every learning process starts in a pretty restricted context after all (for exactly that reason), and since writing is self-taught in many cases, you have to set your own restrictions.
You better be a genius if you think you can ignore her advice.
At 1:45 , I’d like to argue that those conversations can be used to portray awkwardness or casualness or something. The only time it’s unacceptable is when you’re writing it cause you have nothing else to write.
Or, when it's supposed to be between good friends or family who know each other well. Then it gets really weird. :P
And then remember that while plenty of great authors break those rules all the time, they do it almost always with a purpose in mind. Think of how many of these rules a work like Gabriel Garcia Marquez' "A hundred years of solitude" breaks, but also think why it does it.
Especially the "characters with same names" bit. Sheesh. But this is more geared towards beginning writers anyway. Once you know what you're doing you can be free to break the rules if you want to, and as long as it serves the purpose of your story.
I was thinking exactly of that. As Gabo was a genius during the reading (At least for me) you never get anyone confused, but then you try to recapitulate the argument to other person and you just forget who was Arcadio José and who was José Arcadio.
"And thirdly, the Writer Code is more what you call, 'guidelines,' than actual rules." :-)
Lmao that's exactly what I was thinking-how to use these kinds of devices in a purposeful way.
One Hundred Years of Solitude is my favorite book
I think I got most of these. The only thing I’m conscious of is character descriptions, I know not every single character (including minor characters) should be described in great detail but I think the main characters should be visually described, the protag’s hair colour and eyes are important IMO, and if they see another main character that is quite striking then a little info on what they look like can help to match their character traits. Clothing can also be important to describe, for example if you have a location where characters wear a certain uniform you should describe it and if anyone wears that uniform differently then address it briefly. GRRM and Brandon Sanderson describe their characters often quite vividly, down to their clothes too.
"You shouldn't have different characters with the same name"
Gabriel Garcia Marquez: Hold my beer
Aureliano stopped sounding like a real word by the end of that novel
It seems like George R. R. Martin got away with having plenty of characters with rather similar names...
Drudenfusz In an interview he actually addressed this writing advice and said he had more characters than letters in the alphabet and had no choice 😂
I can think of writers that actually violate almost all of these rules.
Drudenfusz
There's a difference between naming twins Angie and Andrew and making characters Bronn and Bran.
Like with almost all rules, once you master them, you can break them. It's not uncommon for authors to write themselves into their stories, for example. These tips are for new or aspiring authors. GRRM gets away with breaking the rules, because everyone knows that he knows the rules.
Well I suppose I'm in the minority but when I tried to get into Martin's books a decade ago, I bailed out within 50 pages or so precisely because I got annoyed with the barrage of characters even by that point. And I never have got into the books or show since.
Hey Guys! This video is a bit simpler and focuses on some common mistakes I see popping up a lot.
I wanted to end the week with something a little bit lighter because next week I'll be back with some more challenging videos on structural issues. Hope you enjoy!
P.S. Sorry if I'm talking a little fast in this video. Something came up while I was filming and I had to finish quickly.
Points 3 and 4 are pretty much the same. I guess you wanted it to be 25 rather than 24 as 25 is a better number, right?
Ellen Brock in a fan fiction of mine, i created an oc people love. I meant for him to be loveable but my other is indifferent along with my villain. Can i get help with why i made one kid so likeable but more vital characters indifferent?
Ellen Brock do you have a twitter account?
I'm not sure what to say. This is the first time I've seen one of your videos and I feel like the information is crucial for my development as a writer. So thanks, I guess.
Nicely done. I know most of these points, but you covered a couple things I don't know. Thanks!
I know this is specific, but I’ve seen lots of books where sibling characters are like
“Hey little sis!”
“What’s up big bro!”
I’m an only child, but I’m the only only child I know, and frankly, I’ve never EVER seen any siblings act like this. I only see them refer to their siblings by name or by insult hahaha.
Just.. if you have siblings, try to think about the last time you said “hey brother” or “hey sister” as a greeting, and if you’re an only child, try to think of the last time you’ve seen siblings interact this way.
It’s highly unrealistic and awkward and I’ve actually quit reading books from it
My sister and I will sometimes address each other as "Tvinlling" (We're half Norwegian and twins, just for clarity.)
This is hilarious, true, and on-point. Great tips. And big thank you for jumping straight to it, and with funny examples to boot!
It depends on the type of book you're trying to write for a few of these but generally I confess to loads of these in my twelve year old fanfiction writing days
Aye, I confess to them too 🤣 Over the time of a few months, I have become a much better improved writer. In my 6th grade year, I dealt with many of these problems. Now, as I've turned 13, I see that I've grown in skill, yet I also know there's still so much more room to practice and improve in, so there quite obviously be no end to watching videos like these and reading to pick off talents and skills from other writers.