The perspective thing is true, I know I look more feminine but if I imagine myself as a boy but with feminine features it makes it so much better even if only I see myself that way
Yesss! Though for me, when I look in the mirror, I'll feel bad if I say things like "I am a man", or "I am a woman". But simply saying "I am"? Instant euphoria ✨
I used to have massive dysphoria in feminine clothes but now nothing gives me gender euphoria like putting on a ridiculous fit and thinking of myself as a slutty femboy
a thing that really helps me when I'm feeling insecure about being non-binary or having kind of- internalised transphobic thoughts ig? is remembering queer history. There's a lot of people that came before you that felt the same way and/or were trans, people on the internet like to dramatise and say having different pronouns or being trans is new, when it's not! It's something that's been seen in many different cultures and throughout history time and time again :))
Hi! I think you're right, but I also think one thing has changed: freedom to speak about it and having role models. I was born in the end of the 80's, I'm not so far from 40yo right now, so not so old but not still young 😂 When I grew up, nobody was talking about it. I didn't even know the same feeling could exist anywhere else. Everybody found and told me I was weird, and I built myself with this... alien feeling ? 😂 I didn't feel like I was a girl, I thought everybody was wrong and I was a boy for real. Few months ago, I discovered the word to describe what I feel : non binary. I was pretty choked that there was a name for this now 😂 When I see you, young people, talking about it so easily, trade tips and reviews about material to help, I have some regrets for the young myself, lost in dead end questions... You have a real great chance to share and receive tips, to feel like a community, supported by people feeling as you do. And old boomers like me, with our unstable construction of ourselves, look at you with a sweet parenting smile. Let's go, rule the world, you're all right ❤ Don't be ashamed to feel what you feel, to be who you are. Take care of you, stay safe, that's fair. ❤ Ps: English isn't my first language, sry if I made mistakes.
I'm transfem (maybe non-binary maybe a trans woman) and I totally relate to the perspective thing. If I look in the mirror and I'm like "That's a feminine man" I hate it but if I think "That's a masculine woman" I feel better. I like dressing androgynous and wearing band tshirts and the idea of being like a cool lesbian is so appealing to me.
I’ll bind and dress masculinely, get called a guy, then the same day for like dinner or something dress femininely (still binded if I’m not with my parents), get called a girl, and I’m just like “yesssss” because being confusing is fun
@@Squirrelstar they’re dressing to purposely confuse people lmao and these are always the kind of people that throw a tantrum when you “misgender” them.
I'm non-binary and I mostly wear grey or dark blue or black colored shirts with dark green or black cargo pants. I never knew that darker colors can hide shape until I found your videos and I'm so glad I know now.
Very useful and overall chill video. Even as a cis guy, being a femboy gives me many ways of expressing my gender expression and how I see myself. It’s been a while being a femboy but only now am I really learning how I’m able to do things that make me feel confident and cute. I’ve still got a long journey ahead and you’ve been helping with your great fashion ideas :3
Well I’ve only got a couple fashion items I really like but just things likes skirts and crop tops I absolutely love.Being a teen with non-accepting parents it’s hard to get clothes I like but it’s totally worth it (if you’re safe doing it) :3
here are some things that give me gender euphoria: 1. My leather jacket that hides my chest perfectly 2. a black button down that's a tad too big tucked into my pants 3. SUITS 4. Mixing a cute little dress or lacy top with a big chunky jacket
Whenever I watch your videos I get super excited and start doing my makeup or throw on some clothes just to look at myself in the mirror. No going outside, just feeling handsome. Thanks for your content♥️
The looking at yourself from the wrong perspective and feeling ughh really hit the spot. That's what I do the whole day and I know I shouldn't care so much, but I care about what the people I work with think. I am scared of being myself because I feel so different and like they can't like the way I am if I'll let myself be different. Everyone seems so easy going, like they don't have to worry about coming off weird
Yes, I have the same feeling. The thing, is most people will never understand. It's up to you to find yourself and feel free, no matter how constrictive society is. As with everything, that comes with both good and bad sides.
dude this is so true! I feel like getting misgendered definitely shifts my perspective of myself from feminine guy to masculine woman, because I remember so many times that when I looked at myself after being referred to as ‘she’ my perception of myself changed so much. This cleared SO much up. Thank you, youtube algorithm for recommending this - and thank you for making it!
9:00 I am an NB, and I've been summoned! 🙌 I can related to pretty much everything mentioned here (except for the piercing part, but I don't even have earrings so I guess that's pretty gender affirming already when I want to feel boyish). I'm genderfluid AFAB, and specially looking like a feminine boy more than a masculine girl is both a mood on its own, and a clever trick to pursue gender euphoria instead of getting stuck on gender dysphoria.
The whole bit about how you look at yourself is very true! Some of the best moments to me are when I can look in the mirror and tell myself: "Damn, you sure are one handsome guy" Also, some weeks ago I wore a skirt for the first time in years for a costume and I was very worried that it was going to make me super dysphoric, but once I actually put it on and looked at myself, I just saw myself as a man in drag and that was a surprisingly positive experience
holy crap.....your experience with gender hit SO close to home to me. it's so similar to my own!! from using she/he pronouns but not really liking they, so referring to yourself as a "boygirl" (i'm literally currently working on making a patch that says "girlboy" for my jacket) to liking looking like an androgynous boy and even referring to yourself as one...! it just.....man. you even have a slightly similar haircut to me.
I just want to say I stumbled upon your channel last night and it’s really revolutionised my perception of gender and my own identity within myself. The feeling of being “different” from others around me and not really fitting anywhere, the joy I feel wearing men’s style of clothing, and my shorter mullet-type hair… I just thought I was a little more androgynous but still a woman (demigirl) or gender fluid (sometimes feminine, sometimes masculine..) but I think I am actually agender. I feel as though I don’t have a gender - none of the labels fit me. And I like it more that way! There’s nothing to conform to, or a box to fit into.. or the imposter syndrome of “but am I actually _?” In another video of yours (2y ago) you talked about how being friends with guys doesn’t have that pressure to be one of them. I realized that was something I was feeling, trying to be friends with other women/girls in my life. It’s nothing against them of course, but it really did weigh on me that I wasn’t like them, and I didn’t belong… Majority of the people I speak to on a daily basis now are my guy friends, nb friends, trans friends.. I just struggle to relate to women I guess. Another thing you said got me thinking - you mentioned perception. I have actually struggled with this the most. Wanting to be perceived as masculine, something other than a woman… but looking at myself in the mirror and just seeing a girl in boy’s clothing - which makes me feel icky, it’s not right. So when you said you think about being a boy with feminine features, it clicked for me! I should be who I feel I am meant to be, and if I see myself as a boy, so what? If it makes me happy, then that’s what matters. So, all that to say THANK YOU Iris!! You’ve helped me figure some things out, and you also have banger asf fashion sense I am 100% going to use for outfit inspo now haha ❤
Hi. My first phase of journey was also a feeling where you feel like an impostor and you don't fit anywhere. I guess that's how all of us start. I'm someone who doesn't conform. I see myself as a being that just exists in the way it wants to. To look how you want and do what you want is being free in this society. Perception of yourself is the most important, what resides inside is who you actually are. At least, that's how I see these things. Just wanted to add something more..
OMG!! You just explained how I wanna feel with the nail polish!!! I paint my nails black a lot and idk why but like I never knew it’s kinda like I wanna look like one of those cute boys who’s paint their nails cause I am one of those cute boys who paints their nails!!:))))
I definitely relate to the perspective thing! And when it comes to pronouns, I relate to the whole not loving they/them but still wanting it as a pronoun set for other reasons. I’m nonbinary and still sorting out what pronouns I want to use when I come out and currently am sitting in he/they/it, but right now I love he/him and feel kind of detached from they/them but still want them as part of my pronoun set to A)easily signal I’m nonbinary and not a binary guy, and B) like you said, give the option for people to acknowledge my gender in that ungendered way. I also like the idea of having it/its as well, also not because I feel as in love with them on me as he/him but because it signals a level of genderfuck and ungenderedness that I’d like others to know
I'm nonbinary and dress a little more masc. I've found recently that muscle tank tops really help with that comfy masc feel without feeling restricted ( I have some mild sensory issues that modern shirt sleeves love to annoy).
just got my first truly gender-affirming haircut today! i know a lot of transmascs go through the struggle of having a female hairstylist who somehow turns a wolfcut into a bob/pixiecut but i specified that i wanted the hair to start short in the front and drop behind the ear and it came out really well!
I love the perspective talk. I started transitioning about 3 months ago now and I love looking in the mirror and envisions myself as a masc woman. It can help when I look at myself and feel iffy about my overall appearance. 😃
Oh my god I can't express how much I relate just in the opposite way. I love seeing myself as a girl just with some more masculine features. Love your videos!!
silly enbie here i get so encouraged by your vids and always i get motivated to change things that give me disphoria but i end with the same sensation of repression by own self its like i repress my self but also want to flourish but the little cocoon doesnt want to open its so frustrating, but your videos are cool and encouraging thnks iris
In a restrictive society that we live in, that happens a lot. Many people struggle with that. You have my support to slowly get out of that shell and free yourself. Embrace your true self.
It's interesting, how even without your videos in the past, I still reached similar conclusion. I already applied most of these tips. We are really similar in some way. Still, appreciate the content that you do. 🙂💜
long skirts. i feel so much gender euphoria around long skirts. i do mostly wear pants because my skirts don't have pockets and i've been too lazy to add them in, but when i wear a skirt i just feel so much cooler and like i'm fucking around with gender. also i tend to categorize my outfits less as fem and masc and more as "vaguely fantasy" and "vaguely apocalyptic" (more crossover in those styles than you'd think) and that feels vaguely related my gender expression.
The way you explain how feeling like a boy with feminine features feels so much better than feeling like a masc woman, omg, I relate sooo much!! By the way, the things that usually give me gender euphoria is practicing hobbies that are male-dominated such as chess, fighting games or watching movies/tv shows loved mostly by boys (???) lol I don't know why but being able to talk about "masculine interests" make me feel hot haha
So I kinda know I'm agender and I haven't told anyone except myself. But lately I have realized my brain start replacing she/her Pronouns with they/them Pronouns and it makes me feel good. So I think I'll start with telling my therapist to use they/them Pronouns when talking to me but not with my parents. Your videos have helped me so much thank you ❤❤
thank you for this video! ive kinda always just leaned towards feminine fashion / makeup because i am female, and i always felt scared to be judged i think. but recently, I've been trying to be more myself, and have felt a lot more connected to myself in including more masculine fashion + using any/all pronouns. ps. you're so pretty and the way you speak is so calming
I think it’s about time for me to buy a binder/compressed sports bra. my chest often ruins my perception when I’m trying to appear neutral or masc. my body type isn’t quite feminine but I am mid sized with medium sized breasts and I often just wish I was born flat chested lol.
I love this and really relate to this; The biggest leap I've done is get a binder, but even that has changed a lot! I feel and see myself as more masculine despite not changing anything on most days.
Honestly I can realte to a lot of the things you described about your gender. I have so much fun ideas of how I wanna express myself in an andro way. Though I don't actually feel like I am able to do so. I live in a town, and although not that small, it's still a place where everyone knows each other. Besides, I am still in high school, so even if I get over the potential judgement that I am afraid of from classmates (and I have many queer friends, one other trans friend, and they are very much frowned upon by peers), I don't want to deal with my family and their views on gender. My mom loves complaining when I get clothes from the men's section. Though my dad is accidentally supportive and doesn't care, and even somewhat encourages me, in my more masc expression. The funniest part is that my mom knows I am sapphic and suppoerts me and my dad is homophobic as hell. But yeah, going all the way isn't an option for me currently. I don't have much gender dysphoria and soon enough I am going to a university in the capital to study animation, so I will go wild once that happens. This got very long but I kinda just wanted to share my experience with gender expression.
The enbies have been summoned! Hehehe)) The perspective thing is so true I can feel really euphoric in more “fem” outfits bc I view myself as boy-ish element and that’s awesome But then someone will say “aww u r such a pretty girl” and imma be like🥲🥲🥲🥲 Anyway thanks a lot for your content! Been following you for years at this point and I really enjoy your videos, as a fellow genderqueer being ehehhe
it's nice that i see this video now because right before i went on youtube, i had a blast making new outfits and masc make ups with music on, and it gave me sooo much gender euphoria! Taking the clothes that i used to style fem like i learned how to, but styling them in a way that makes me feel good, and looking at myself in the mirror seeing a silly confident dude, it's so nice x)
i’m soo glad this video got recommended to me as a genderqueer omg .. that reframing the thinking of instead of “masc girl” into “fem boy” genuinely just changed my life😭thank you so much
i just discovered your channel the other week and it's been a huge help to me as i've finally started to explore how i present myself at age 23 :') i've been feeling a little behind everyone else, and your videos are such a huge comfort to me as someone who was worried i'd never be able to figure it out. i've finally been able to find outfits i feel comfortable in past jeans/basketball shorts and hoodies!! thank you so much :) ps your style kind of reminds me of beomgyu from txt haha
Apart from the pronouns thing I relate to pretty much everything in some way! And the perspective thing is SO true its crazy! I used to avoid femininity in my gender expression before I realized I was trans, even though I liked certain feminine clothes or nake up, it just felt off somehow As soon as I fully accepted my nonbinary identity I could finally start appreciating things about my appearance and I'm way more comfy with being feminine~ Now I just have a ton of make up skills to catch up on x'D I also really feel the part about monitoring my speach so people don't get the wrong idea about my identity I also feel very boy-ish a lot of the time, but I avoid voicing it too much because I hate the idea of being seen as a man, it makes me almost as dysphoric as being seen as a woman tbh But I've started opening up about it to my queer friends It really helps having a group of supportive people who just embrace you as you are ^^
being a boyfriend is v gender euphoria for me, dying my hair, eyebrow piercing !! dressing goth, black lipstick, smudged eyeliner, having a mini mohawk / mullet thing, hexagon glasses feel v nonbinary to me !! wearing my binder helps a lot, and wearing trousers too, also chains and spiked jewelry like "punk" jewelry especially spikes, wearing platforms makes me feel masc too context im a nonbinary trans guy !!
Things that feel very gender to me: 1. layering masc and fem. Binder + corset + flannel + cargos, long skirt + tool belt, small waistcoat + big pants 2. Small waistcoat or big formal pants in general, with anything 3. Accessories! Tiny horseshoe as a necklace, esp if clothes are more fem, chains that accentuate my hips and are metal as fu, literal medieval nails as hair sticks, separate key chains and tools from mentioned tool belt, leaning into punk with tie on a bare neck 4. Long hair and boyish bangs. Will get a mullet later bc i just turned 18 >:)
Yes I love this! I'm trying to learn more about ways to express/get gender euphoria, the self-perception concept you mentioned sounds like something I want to try doing and see how I feel
I'm genderfluid and everytime I get a new haircut, it gives me so much gender euphoria. I'm actually going to the hairdresser tomorrow and I'm so excited for it ! Makeup helps me a lot too, I only start to use makeup this summer. Just with the eyeliner I can make my face look more feminine or masculine depend of how I'm feeling. Thank you a lot for the others advices !
I'm really glad i found your channel! You're really helping me figure out how to dress more boyish and even learn about some new fashion trends. Also, you seem like such a sweet and fun person, and you live in NY just like i do! I was so happy when you said that because who knows? Maybe i'll be lucky enough to actually run into you one day! It's just that i have no friends and i've been kind of lonely, and i feel like you'd be an awesome friend 😊❤
Honestly, your videos have helped me like myself so much more! Your makeup tutorials are really nice (very slay) your outfits are always super cool, and even videos like this are really nice!!!!
I often wear bigger clothing on days where I feel my gender dysphoric. I love wearing big hoodies or my favorite sweater because it not only makes me feel more comfortable in my gender but also very comfortable in my body. Thank you for your content btw
Getting my hair half buzzed as initiating a new beginning. And the few times I’ve cosplayed as 2D anime boys. And wearing princess hair clips. Also keeping my leg hair and loving the touch, inspired by Nick Nelson from Heartstopper. Oh and wearing harem pants. A lot of it being not living out my teenage years when I was a teenager, so that special youthful touch means all the more.
the "looking in the mirror and seeing a boy" is SOOO relatable! Although I often need to get somewhat dressed for me tobtruly see it, I just fovus on the "boyish" features I have. Also you don't need this because your eyebrows are fucking perfect, but as someone with very fair body hair, dyeing my eyebrows has been a game changer. The way I look so muvh more masculine makes me so happy!!! To the point where I will see a picture of me before dyeing my eyebtows and see how feminine I loked 😭
my gender is very complicated, because of my autism i don’t feel gender so in that way you could say i’m agender, but i want to be viewed as a boy/masc by society so in that way im ftm? but i love dressing feminine and pink (which i don’t rlly do due to dysphoria, maybe once im on T i’ll be more comfy) so i love watching vids like these, and how all of these relate so much to me!! i love seeing others explore their identity and sharing what makes them feel better or worse to learn from it:) love ur videos man!
I'm still figuring out the gender things but I mostly present masc and androgynous. So these are things that make me feel euphoric: -Button. Up. Mens. Shirts. The funkier the better. -chunky jewelry -cargo pants -clunky platform shoes -vests over float pirate sleeve tops -cardigans >>>> -short hair >>>> -viewing myself as a pretty boy instead of a boy stuck in female clothes whenever I wear dresses or feminine clothing
The perspective thing is interesting because people also react differently to the same behavior in people based on what their perceived gender is. Meaning people see the same thing very differently depending on how they gender the subject so it seems normal this also counts for how we see ourselves and that’s cool.
Saving bugs and taking them outside when people are scared is a weird one I love. You get to be a man by helping a little bug not get swatted, and sometimes you've saved a scared friend too haha
omg, i do the perspective thing so much and i didnt notice :3 im afab nonbinary (er.. i usually wouldnt mention my birth gender but i feel the context is important) and i have long hair for gender reasons, and sometimes when i look in the mirror i go oh no long hair = girl! and then i remember the whole reason i have long hair is because of a male fictional character i relate to and then im like Oh. Well anyways. also, personally, big fan of feeling like a super masc guy and a super fem girl at the same time
Anime boi hair is literally my everyday goal as a non-binary afab. I love romance anime and most of its male characters have long-ish hair, so it helps me feel better about "not looking masculine enough". Because it reminds me that I don't want to look like a man, I just want to look like a pretty anime boi.
I have been summoned. Hello Active, choices surrounding my hair is gender euphoric. On the flip side, if my hair is passively growing or I find me putting my hair up just to get it up and not having fun with it. That is bad. I have started considering getting a few options for low effort hair curling to combat the bad vibes. I'm nerodivergent and have limited spoons; getting out the curling iron and doing my whole head is not viable. I also have shiny object syndrome; I'm thinking two or three night-time curling options would be best. Also, some kind of night cap or hair scarf to: protect the curling equipment, make it into a nightly ritual, and fully embrace the grandma vibes.
I like to dress like a whimsical little hobbit fairy being bc I just feel like I’m magical and have no need to have gender and that gives me ✨peak✨ confidence and euphoria
i hate how feminine my face looks no matter what i wear but i found that wearing a face mask really helps or hats since they hide my face. my parents are really religious so whenever i go out i have to wear skirts, dresses etc however loose pants like cargo pants are a solution that only cause minimal yelling also blazers being called handsome or boyish is definitely gives me a lot of gender euphoria once my dad called me son by mistake because of my short hair and boy that felt good
Hi, Amab nb summoned, I relate to a lot of your points, not all cause I do prefer they/them over other pronouns and also don’t have to use a binder sense amab, but aside from that, definitely spot on, I absolutely love presenting androgynously, and mixing “feminine and masculine” clothing. And I also definitely enjoy painting my nails, I realized it looked good and I shouldn’t care if people react badly (neither should any of you) and honestly I hope I can find some enby friends around to connect with, I didn’t even think of how lovely that would be.
Its so funny, when you said "feeling insecure" something clicked for me cause ive always had such a problem calling my experience with that feeling "dysphoria" because i dont feel trans enough as a non binary person but i pretty much experience the exact same thing. Especially with the being seen as a masc woman verses being seen as a cute pretty boy. The first is confusing and makes me feel bad and the latter is HOME.
As a non-binary person who grew up in VERY conservative patriarchal country and then came to America, I struggle to understand what could even be gender affirming in a society where gender roles and norms are pretty much nonexistent anymore. All clothes are for everyone, I struggle to associate most clothes with any specific gender. Short hair is for everyone, completely normal on a woman nowadays. Because gender is a social construct, I feel less and less non-binary in this society the longer I live here and start feeling more and more like just a woman which is very interesting development.
I love calling myself a boy or boysh when do somethong boysh. Like when i wear a shirt from mens section- guy, someone thought that im a guy- the mascest guy there. Its like a complimet to myself, that i wouldnt get from others ^^
Accidentally matching outfits with my cis boyfriend has always been a fun source of euphoria for me. Also, I see myself as a femboy and that’s just fun, man. Oh also unpacking internalized transphobia helps a lot with feeling better about your own gender.
I just got my first sports bras that I bought with intention to compress my chest a bit. Didn't feel the need to go for binder, but just make my b00ba less obvious. And I love them so, so much.
My dyslexic ass really thought I was gonna learn how to find a ginger in Europa
LMFAO
lmfao 😭
u what lolol
lmao
What
The perspective thing is true, I know I look more feminine but if I imagine myself as a boy but with feminine features it makes it so much better even if only I see myself that way
exactly exactly ❤️❤️❤️❤️
yesss this is exactly what i do!
Yesss! Though for me, when I look in the mirror, I'll feel bad if I say things like "I am a man", or "I am a woman". But simply saying "I am"? Instant euphoria ✨
I used to have massive dysphoria in feminine clothes but now nothing gives me gender euphoria like putting on a ridiculous fit and thinking of myself as a slutty femboy
I've been doing that for years but its starting to not work anymore cause then I know that the people around me won't see me as a boy.
that one sweatshirt + good hair day = gender euphoria
The thing you said about being ick one day and then another day like "oh I'm hot" is so relatable
Same
No I'm always ick
a thing that really helps me when I'm feeling insecure about being non-binary or having kind of- internalised transphobic thoughts ig? is remembering queer history. There's a lot of people that came before you that felt the same way and/or were trans, people on the internet like to dramatise and say having different pronouns or being trans is new, when it's not! It's something that's been seen in many different cultures and throughout history time and time again :))
Hi!
I think you're right, but I also think one thing has changed: freedom to speak about it and having role models. I was born in the end of the 80's, I'm not so far from 40yo right now, so not so old but not still young 😂 When I grew up, nobody was talking about it. I didn't even know the same feeling could exist anywhere else. Everybody found and told me I was weird, and I built myself with this... alien feeling ? 😂 I didn't feel like I was a girl, I thought everybody was wrong and I was a boy for real.
Few months ago, I discovered the word to describe what I feel : non binary. I was pretty choked that there was a name for this now 😂 When I see you, young people, talking about it so easily, trade tips and reviews about material to help, I have some regrets for the young myself, lost in dead end questions...
You have a real great chance to share and receive tips, to feel like a community, supported by people feeling as you do. And old boomers like me, with our unstable construction of ourselves, look at you with a sweet parenting smile.
Let's go, rule the world, you're all right ❤ Don't be ashamed to feel what you feel, to be who you are. Take care of you, stay safe, that's fair. ❤
Ps: English isn't my first language, sry if I made mistakes.
I'm transfem (maybe non-binary maybe a trans woman) and I totally relate to the perspective thing. If I look in the mirror and I'm like "That's a feminine man" I hate it but if I think "That's a masculine woman" I feel better. I like dressing androgynous and wearing band tshirts and the idea of being like a cool lesbian is so appealing to me.
I’ll bind and dress masculinely, get called a guy, then the same day for like dinner or something dress femininely (still binded if I’m not with my parents), get called a girl, and I’m just like “yesssss” because being confusing is fun
slay
@@irisolympia thank you!!!! Its legit the best thing ever :D
So y’all do it to be annoying ok got it
@@bubblesbubbles7988 how is it annoying? 😭
It’s just dressing a certain way-?
@@Squirrelstar they’re dressing to purposely confuse people lmao and these are always the kind of people that throw a tantrum when you “misgender” them.
I'm non-binary and I mostly wear grey or dark blue or black colored shirts with dark green or black cargo pants. I never knew that darker colors can hide shape until I found your videos and I'm so glad I know now.
hehehe yay! that’s what i’m here for ❤️❤️❤️
Very useful and overall chill video. Even as a cis guy, being a femboy gives me many ways of expressing my gender expression and how I see myself. It’s been a while being a femboy but only now am I really learning how I’m able to do things that make me feel confident and cute. I’ve still got a long journey ahead and you’ve been helping with your great fashion ideas :3
You go boi!^^
What’s your favourite things to wear? Just curious and trying to chat and maybe help haha
Well I’ve only got a couple fashion items I really like but just things likes skirts and crop tops I absolutely love.Being a teen with non-accepting parents it’s hard to get clothes I like but it’s totally worth it (if you’re safe doing it) :3
here are some things that give me gender euphoria:
1. My leather jacket that hides my chest perfectly
2. a black button down that's a tad too big tucked into my pants
3. SUITS
4. Mixing a cute little dress or lacy top with a big chunky jacket
SUITS 🙏🙏🙏
@@elliesart_ FR
Whenever I watch your videos I get super excited and start doing my makeup or throw on some clothes just to look at myself in the mirror. No going outside, just feeling handsome. Thanks for your content♥️
omg yay this is so meaningful thank you for sharing 😭 glad i can help create that space
IRIS YOU HAVE SUCCESFULLY SUMMONED US🗣️🔥
🕯️😏
The looking at yourself from the wrong perspective and feeling ughh really hit the spot. That's what I do the whole day and I know I shouldn't care so much, but I care about what the people I work with think. I am scared of being myself because I feel so different and like they can't like the way I am if I'll let myself be different. Everyone seems so easy going, like they don't have to worry about coming off weird
Yes, I have the same feeling. The thing, is most people will never understand. It's up to you to find yourself and feel free, no matter how constrictive society is. As with everything, that comes with both good and bad sides.
the lighting and the vibes of this video are so calm and its exactly what i need rn!
yay!! thx for watching ❤️❤️❤️
dude this is so true!
I feel like getting misgendered definitely shifts my perspective of myself from feminine guy to masculine woman, because I remember so many times that when I looked at myself after being referred to as ‘she’ my perception of myself changed so much. This cleared SO much up. Thank you, youtube algorithm for recommending this - and thank you for making it!
9:00 I am an NB, and I've been summoned! 🙌
I can related to pretty much everything mentioned here (except for the piercing part, but I don't even have earrings so I guess that's pretty gender affirming already when I want to feel boyish). I'm genderfluid AFAB, and specially looking like a feminine boy more than a masculine girl is both a mood on its own, and a clever trick to pursue gender euphoria instead of getting stuck on gender dysphoria.
yayy thx for watching!!
The whole bit about how you look at yourself is very true! Some of the best moments to me are when I can look in the mirror and tell myself: "Damn, you sure are one handsome guy"
Also, some weeks ago I wore a skirt for the first time in years for a costume and I was very worried that it was going to make me super dysphoric, but once I actually put it on and looked at myself, I just saw myself as a man in drag and that was a surprisingly positive experience
holy crap.....your experience with gender hit SO close to home to me. it's so similar to my own!! from using she/he pronouns but not really liking they, so referring to yourself as a "boygirl" (i'm literally currently working on making a patch that says "girlboy" for my jacket) to liking looking like an androgynous boy and even referring to yourself as one...! it just.....man. you even have a slightly similar haircut to me.
I am amab and closeted (can't change it rn) and that could fit me
@@smartsmartie7142 righteous *gender high five*
@@user-iv6gy7hb8u *loud gender high five clap followed by gender confusion noises*
I just want to say I stumbled upon your channel last night and it’s really revolutionised my perception of gender and my own identity within myself.
The feeling of being “different” from others around me and not really fitting anywhere, the joy I feel wearing men’s style of clothing, and my shorter mullet-type hair… I just thought I was a little more androgynous but still a woman (demigirl) or gender fluid (sometimes feminine, sometimes masculine..) but I think I am actually agender.
I feel as though I don’t have a gender - none of the labels fit me. And I like it more that way! There’s nothing to conform to, or a box to fit into.. or the imposter syndrome of “but am I actually _?”
In another video of yours (2y ago) you talked about how being friends with guys doesn’t have that pressure to be one of them. I realized that was something I was feeling, trying to be friends with other women/girls in my life. It’s nothing against them of course, but it really did weigh on me that I wasn’t like them, and I didn’t belong…
Majority of the people I speak to on a daily basis now are my guy friends, nb friends, trans friends.. I just struggle to relate to women I guess.
Another thing you said got me thinking - you mentioned perception. I have actually struggled with this the most. Wanting to be perceived as masculine, something other than a woman… but looking at myself in the mirror and just seeing a girl in boy’s clothing - which makes me feel icky, it’s not right.
So when you said you think about being a boy with feminine features, it clicked for me!
I should be who I feel I am meant to be, and if I see myself as a boy, so what? If it makes me happy, then that’s what matters.
So, all that to say THANK YOU Iris!! You’ve helped me figure some things out, and you also have banger asf fashion sense I am 100% going to use for outfit inspo now haha ❤
Hi. My first phase of journey was also a feeling where you feel like an impostor and you don't fit anywhere. I guess that's how all of us start.
I'm someone who doesn't conform. I see myself as a being that just exists in the way it wants to. To look how you want and do what you want is being free in this society.
Perception of yourself is the most important, what resides inside is who you actually are. At least, that's how I see these things. Just wanted to add something more..
OMG!! You just explained how I wanna feel with the nail polish!!! I paint my nails black a lot and idk why but like I never knew it’s kinda like I wanna look like one of those cute boys who’s paint their nails cause I am one of those cute boys who paints their nails!!:))))
Same, I used to paint my nails black because Freddie Mercury did that in the 70s and he was always a massive source of gender envy for me
@@callum.timothy Freddie is one of my goals 😂❤
I definitely relate to the perspective thing! And when it comes to pronouns, I relate to the whole not loving they/them but still wanting it as a pronoun set for other reasons. I’m nonbinary and still sorting out what pronouns I want to use when I come out and currently am sitting in he/they/it, but right now I love he/him and feel kind of detached from they/them but still want them as part of my pronoun set to A)easily signal I’m nonbinary and not a binary guy, and B) like you said, give the option for people to acknowledge my gender in that ungendered way. I also like the idea of having it/its as well, also not because I feel as in love with them on me as he/him but because it signals a level of genderfuck and ungenderedness that I’d like others to know
yes yes exactly with the detached feeling
I'm nonbinary and dress a little more masc. I've found recently that muscle tank tops really help with that comfy masc feel without feeling restricted ( I have some mild sensory issues that modern shirt sleeves love to annoy).
just got my first truly gender-affirming haircut today! i know a lot of transmascs go through the struggle of having a female hairstylist who somehow turns a wolfcut into a bob/pixiecut but i specified that i wanted the hair to start short in the front and drop behind the ear and it came out really well!
I love the perspective talk. I started transitioning about 3 months ago now and I love looking in the mirror and envisions myself as a masc woman. It can help when I look at myself and feel iffy about my overall appearance. 😃
Ahhh the ears getting pierced and feeling gender euphoria is SO real
Like me too me too
2:15 as a transmasc non-binary person this is so real
Oh my god I can't express how much I relate just in the opposite way. I love seeing myself as a girl just with some more masculine features. Love your videos!!
silly enbie here
i get so encouraged by your vids and always i get motivated to change things that give me disphoria but i end with the same sensation of repression by own self
its like i repress my self but also want to flourish but the little cocoon doesnt want to open
its so frustrating, but your videos are cool and encouraging thnks iris
In a restrictive society that we live in, that happens a lot. Many people struggle with that. You have my support to slowly get out of that shell and free yourself. Embrace your true self.
People have probably told u this but your name is pretty❤
CAN SOMEONE TALK ABT THE LIGHTING IN THIS VIDEO!!!! THIS WHOLE VIDEO IS A WORK OF ART
I’m really struggling with the self perception part, I’m gonna try to think of myself different like how you did :)
🙏❤️
It's interesting, how even without your videos in the past, I still reached similar conclusion. I already applied most of these tips. We are really similar in some way. Still, appreciate the content that you do. 🙂💜
long skirts. i feel so much gender euphoria around long skirts. i do mostly wear pants because my skirts don't have pockets and i've been too lazy to add them in, but when i wear a skirt i just feel so much cooler and like i'm fucking around with gender. also i tend to categorize my outfits less as fem and masc and more as "vaguely fantasy" and "vaguely apocalyptic" (more crossover in those styles than you'd think) and that feels vaguely related my gender expression.
The way you explain how feeling like a boy with feminine features feels so much better than feeling like a masc woman, omg, I relate sooo much!! By the way, the things that usually give me gender euphoria is practicing hobbies that are male-dominated such as chess, fighting games or watching movies/tv shows loved mostly by boys (???) lol I don't know why but being able to talk about "masculine interests" make me feel hot haha
So I kinda know I'm agender and I haven't told anyone except myself. But lately I have realized my brain start replacing she/her Pronouns with they/them Pronouns and it makes me feel good. So I think I'll start with telling my therapist to use they/them Pronouns when talking to me but not with my parents. Your videos have helped me so much thank you ❤❤
thank you so much! I am also non-binary and this video brings me a lot of comfort, btw love your look, you are very beautiful, handsome and pretty 💜
thank you for this video! ive kinda always just leaned towards feminine fashion / makeup because i am female, and i always felt scared to be judged i think. but recently, I've been trying to be more myself, and have felt a lot more connected to myself in including more masculine fashion + using any/all pronouns.
ps. you're so pretty and the way you speak is so calming
I think it’s about time for me to buy a binder/compressed sports bra.
my chest often ruins my perception when I’m trying to appear neutral or masc.
my body type isn’t quite feminine but I am mid sized with medium sized breasts and I often just wish I was born flat chested lol.
I love this and really relate to this;
The biggest leap I've done is get a binder, but even that has changed a lot! I feel and see myself as more masculine despite not changing anything on most days.
Thank you for sharing this validating and uplifting vid! This is the first time we’ve heard the term gender “euphoria” and we love it! ❤️🤍🖤
I loved this video
ty for watchingggg!!
Honestly I can realte to a lot of the things you described about your gender. I have so much fun ideas of how I wanna express myself in an andro way. Though I don't actually feel like I am able to do so. I live in a town, and although not that small, it's still a place where everyone knows each other. Besides, I am still in high school, so even if I get over the potential judgement that I am afraid of from classmates (and I have many queer friends, one other trans friend, and they are very much frowned upon by peers), I don't want to deal with my family and their views on gender. My mom loves complaining when I get clothes from the men's section. Though my dad is accidentally supportive and doesn't care, and even somewhat encourages me, in my more masc expression. The funniest part is that my mom knows I am sapphic and suppoerts me and my dad is homophobic as hell. But yeah, going all the way isn't an option for me currently. I don't have much gender dysphoria and soon enough I am going to a university in the capital to study animation, so I will go wild once that happens. This got very long but I kinda just wanted to share my experience with gender expression.
The enbies have been summoned! Hehehe))
The perspective thing is so true I can feel really euphoric in more “fem” outfits bc I view myself as boy-ish element and that’s awesome
But then someone will say “aww u r such a pretty girl” and imma be like🥲🥲🥲🥲
Anyway thanks a lot for your content! Been following you for years at this point and I really enjoy your videos, as a fellow genderqueer being ehehhe
AN ENBY HAS BEEN SUMMONED!!
it's nice that i see this video now because right before i went on youtube, i had a blast making new outfits and masc make ups with music on, and it gave me sooo much gender euphoria! Taking the clothes that i used to style fem like i learned how to, but styling them in a way that makes me feel good, and looking at myself in the mirror seeing a silly confident dude, it's so nice x)
i’m soo glad this video got recommended to me as a genderqueer omg .. that reframing the thinking of instead of “masc girl” into “fem boy” genuinely just changed my life😭thank you so much
i just discovered your channel the other week and it's been a huge help to me as i've finally started to explore how i present myself at age 23 :') i've been feeling a little behind everyone else, and your videos are such a huge comfort to me as someone who was worried i'd never be able to figure it out. i've finally been able to find outfits i feel comfortable in past jeans/basketball shorts and hoodies!! thank you so much :) ps your style kind of reminds me of beomgyu from txt haha
Apart from the pronouns thing I relate to pretty much everything in some way!
And the perspective thing is SO true its crazy! I used to avoid femininity in my gender expression before I realized I was trans, even though I liked certain feminine clothes or nake up, it just felt off somehow
As soon as I fully accepted my nonbinary identity I could finally start appreciating things about my appearance and I'm way more comfy with being feminine~
Now I just have a ton of make up skills to catch up on x'D
I also really feel the part about monitoring my speach so people don't get the wrong idea about my identity
I also feel very boy-ish a lot of the time, but I avoid voicing it too much because I hate the idea of being seen as a man, it makes me almost as dysphoric as being seen as a woman tbh
But I've started opening up about it to my queer friends
It really helps having a group of supportive people who just embrace you as you are ^^
being a boyfriend is v gender euphoria for me, dying my hair, eyebrow piercing !! dressing goth, black lipstick, smudged eyeliner, having a mini mohawk / mullet thing, hexagon glasses feel v nonbinary to me !! wearing my binder helps a lot, and wearing trousers too, also chains and spiked jewelry like "punk" jewelry especially spikes, wearing platforms makes me feel masc too
context im a nonbinary trans guy !!
Things that feel very gender to me:
1. layering masc and fem. Binder + corset + flannel + cargos, long skirt + tool belt, small waistcoat + big pants
2. Small waistcoat or big formal pants in general, with anything
3. Accessories! Tiny horseshoe as a necklace, esp if clothes are more fem, chains that accentuate my hips and are metal as fu, literal medieval nails as hair sticks, separate key chains and tools from mentioned tool belt, leaning into punk with tie on a bare neck
4. Long hair and boyish bangs. Will get a mullet later bc i just turned 18 >:)
Yes I love this! I'm trying to learn more about ways to express/get gender euphoria, the self-perception concept you mentioned sounds like something I want to try doing and see how I feel
Its always so comfy to watch a vid from a fellow non-binary person xd
thx for watching!! ❤️
I'm genderfluid and everytime I get a new haircut, it gives me so much gender euphoria. I'm actually going to the hairdresser tomorrow and I'm so excited for it ! Makeup helps me a lot too, I only start to use makeup this summer. Just with the eyeliner I can make my face look more feminine or masculine depend of how I'm feeling. Thank you a lot for the others advices !
I'm really glad i found your channel! You're really helping me figure out how to dress more boyish and even learn about some new fashion trends. Also, you seem like such a sweet and fun person, and you live in NY just like i do! I was so happy when you said that because who knows? Maybe i'll be lucky enough to actually run into you one day! It's just that i have no friends and i've been kind of lonely, and i feel like you'd be an awesome friend 😊❤
Honestly, your videos have helped me like myself so much more! Your makeup tutorials are really nice (very slay) your outfits are always super cool, and even videos like this are really nice!!!!
I often wear bigger clothing on days where I feel my gender dysphoric. I love wearing big hoodies or my favorite sweater because it not only makes me feel more comfortable in my gender but also very comfortable in my body. Thank you for your content btw
Getting my hair half buzzed as initiating a new beginning. And the few times I’ve cosplayed as 2D anime boys. And wearing princess hair clips. Also keeping my leg hair and loving the touch, inspired by Nick Nelson from Heartstopper. Oh and wearing harem
pants. A lot of it being not living out my
teenage years when I was a teenager,
so that special youthful touch means all
the more.
just want to thank you for listing the equipment you use!
the "looking in the mirror and seeing a boy" is SOOO relatable! Although I often need to get somewhat dressed for me tobtruly see it, I just fovus on the "boyish" features I have.
Also you don't need this because your eyebrows are fucking perfect, but as someone with very fair body hair, dyeing my eyebrows has been a game changer. The way I look so muvh more masculine makes me so happy!!! To the point where I will see a picture of me before dyeing my eyebtows and see how feminine I loked 😭
I love this video. This has really been a helpful video for me. Also, quite comforting. You're also extremely knowledgeable and attractive.
my gender is very complicated, because of my autism i don’t feel gender so in that way you could say i’m agender, but i want to be viewed as a boy/masc by society so in that way im ftm? but i love dressing feminine and pink (which i don’t rlly do due to dysphoria, maybe once im on T i’ll be more comfy) so i love watching vids like these, and how all of these relate so much to me!! i love seeing others explore their identity and sharing what makes them feel better or worse to learn from it:) love ur videos man!
I'm still figuring out the gender things but I mostly present masc and androgynous. So these are things that make me feel euphoric:
-Button. Up. Mens. Shirts. The funkier the better.
-chunky jewelry
-cargo pants
-clunky platform shoes
-vests over float pirate sleeve tops
-cardigans >>>>
-short hair >>>>
-viewing myself as a pretty boy instead of a boy stuck in female clothes whenever I wear dresses or feminine clothing
so glad I found this video, you're so cool my dude!
You have a very soothing and calming voice :)
The perspective thing is interesting because people also react differently to the same behavior in people based on what their perceived gender is. Meaning people see the same thing very differently depending on how they gender the subject
so it seems normal this also counts for how we see ourselves and that’s cool.
Im a teen who recently figured out that I am gender-fluid and this really did help me🫶🫶
I'm new here and my name is Iris too! not found another Iris yet so thats cool
Saving bugs and taking them outside when people are scared is a weird one I love. You get to be a man by helping a little bug not get swatted, and sometimes you've saved a scared friend too haha
omg, i do the perspective thing so much and i didnt notice :3 im afab nonbinary (er.. i usually wouldnt mention my birth gender but i feel the context is important) and i have long hair for gender reasons, and sometimes when i look in the mirror i go oh no long hair = girl! and then i remember the whole reason i have long hair is because of a male fictional character i relate to and then im like Oh. Well anyways. also, personally, big fan of feeling like a super masc guy and a super fem girl at the same time
Mega-relate XD love this!
Anime boi hair is literally my everyday goal as a non-binary afab. I love romance anime and most of its male characters have long-ish hair, so it helps me feel better about "not looking masculine enough". Because it reminds me that I don't want to look like a man, I just want to look like a pretty anime boi.
Very nice to feel seen ⭐️🩵 great video!!
the highlight of my day was this video
🥹 thx sm for watching!
i have been summoned
I have been summoned.
Hello
Active, choices surrounding my hair is gender euphoric.
On the flip side, if my hair is passively growing or I find me putting my hair up just to get it up and not having fun with it. That is bad.
I have started considering getting a few options for low effort hair curling to combat the bad vibes. I'm nerodivergent and have limited spoons; getting out the curling iron and doing my whole head is not viable.
I also have shiny object syndrome; I'm thinking two or three night-time curling options would be best. Also, some kind of night cap or hair scarf to: protect the curling equipment, make it into a nightly ritual, and fully embrace the grandma vibes.
things I like to wear/ do for euphoria (Transman)
Button up tops my beloved
YESS okay so its not only me😭 I'm gender fluid but I prefer she/he MUCH more than they, but I still use they cuz it feels weird to only use she and he
I like to dress like a whimsical little hobbit fairy being bc I just feel like I’m magical and have no need to have gender and that gives me ✨peak✨ confidence and euphoria
omg you remind me so much of one of my friends, he uses she/he and doesn’t love they too!! and looks so much like you
Currently figuring out it I like my female side.
My big chest and soft jawline are my biggest insecurity’s and I often cry because of them. Don’t really know what to to about them either
when clothes FIT me well.
makeup and haircuts.
my enby-friends.
others gender euphoria.
affirmations, ahhaha.
and many other things!
I has to shave my own hair bc I have to much anxiety to go to a hairdresser 😢 last time I went he didn’t do what I wanted 😅
Hair 360 please im begging you
I have been summoned. 🛒🛒🛒
Have fun in Glasgow!
Nothing makes me feel more gender euphoric than a really good baggy tee. Weight lifting is another thing that makes me feel great too!
i dont like the term amab but like i wish more nb content was from an amab pov because its a lot dif ftx vs mtx if that makes sense
i hate how feminine my face looks no matter what i wear but i found that wearing a face mask really helps or hats since they hide my face.
my parents are really religious so whenever i go out i have to wear skirts, dresses etc however loose pants like cargo pants are a solution that only cause minimal yelling also blazers
being called handsome or boyish is definitely gives me a lot of gender euphoria
once my dad called me son by mistake because of my short hair and boy that felt good
Hi, Amab nb summoned, I relate to a lot of your points, not all cause I do prefer they/them over other pronouns and also don’t have to use a binder sense amab, but aside from that, definitely spot on, I absolutely love presenting androgynously, and mixing “feminine and masculine” clothing. And I also definitely enjoy painting my nails, I realized it looked good and I shouldn’t care if people react badly (neither should any of you) and honestly I hope I can find some enby friends around to connect with, I didn’t even think of how lovely that would be.
Its so funny, when you said "feeling insecure" something clicked for me cause ive always had such a problem calling my experience with that feeling "dysphoria" because i dont feel trans enough as a non binary person but i pretty much experience the exact same thing. Especially with the being seen as a masc woman verses being seen as a cute pretty boy. The first is confusing and makes me feel bad and the latter is HOME.
As a non-binary person who grew up in VERY conservative patriarchal country and then came to America, I struggle to understand what could even be gender affirming in a society where gender roles and norms are pretty much nonexistent anymore. All clothes are for everyone, I struggle to associate most clothes with any specific gender. Short hair is for everyone, completely normal on a woman nowadays. Because gender is a social construct, I feel less and less non-binary in this society the longer I live here and start feeling more and more like just a woman which is very interesting development.
I love calling myself a boy or boysh when do somethong boysh. Like when i wear a shirt from mens section- guy, someone thought that im a guy- the mascest guy there. Its like a complimet to myself, that i wouldnt get from others ^^
the enbies have been summoned!
tysm and the pronouns thing it happens the same , i use she/he/they but people only use she i would love to hear someone using he so much 😋
ur so beautiful AAAAAAA 😁
Accidentally matching outfits with my cis boyfriend has always been a fun source of euphoria for me. Also, I see myself as a femboy and that’s just fun, man. Oh also unpacking internalized transphobia helps a lot with feeling better about your own gender.
I just got my first sports bras that I bought with intention to compress my chest a bit. Didn't feel the need to go for binder, but just make my b00ba less obvious.
And I love them so, so much.
Thank you
Where is that metal choker from?