How to Become A Magnetic Person
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- čas přidán 27. 07. 2024
- Have you met or have known people that are just super likeable? Those people who draw you in and are super magnetic? Those people, who, when you're with them, you feel good about yourself?
So what is it about them? What are they doing to be likeable, and how did they become so magnetic?
It’s not because they're a special, magical unicorn person. It's because they're doing specific things and they are being intentional about showing up in specific ways that naturally make them more likeable and magnetic people.
In today’s episode of GoodForMeTV, we're talking about the things they're doing and what we can do to become a magnetic person too.
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What draws you to someone and makes you really like them?
I think what draws me to someone is that they have a lot of confidence in themselves and what they are speaking about or doing. Some people just have that bubbly personality that spreads happiness.
Julia Kristina Counselling where a person is bold and stands up for themself and others. I really admire that attitude.😌
Loved this video ,thank you. Discovered you yesterday on you tube and compulsively watching all of them. You are so spot on. In this case ,being seen and eye contact is so powerful I experienced that for the 1st time a year ago. It gets to your core. It touched my neglected needs.Magical. I have been seeking it since. All other points on likability/ magnetism are very relevant, spot on.I get drawn to imperfections and signs of vulnerability, struggle, authenticity in people. It is a big thing if they feel comfortable enough to open up and show that. I have to be careful as I diagnosed myself as co-dependent in interactions ( loved your videos) with certain people so got to watch out if I like the above because I want to get my teeth stuck into them and fix or I like the person. I think it is both and these situations are a great mirror to see myself in and a learning curve for me. Thank you, your work and delivery here is amazing.x
@@renataritchie6363 wymm
People who are REAL. You're smart JK, you know if someone's running a b.s. operation or trying to snow you in the many ways you've exposed in your videos, nearly always from the first interaction.
I remember when I lived with my cousins when I was put in foster care at age 16. I was telling my care giver something that had happened at school, and she stopped washing dishes and with a look of interest turned to listen to me. That moment hit deep because I felt like I mattered for the first time. I think of this moment all the time.
That is really moving. I grew up with parents who stayed married but I can relate somewhat. My father always acted as though we (children) didn’t exist a lot of the time and certainly weren’t far up on his list of priorities. I did feel unseen and unimportant. I’d come home from school and he wouldn’t even look up to say hello or acknowledge me. My older brother treated me the same way (with contempt). My mother was so busy rushing around working, cooking or whatever that she also didn’t spend any time with me. It really takes a toll on you feeling unseen. I spend quite a lot of time talking to my children. I hope they are happier in their lives than I have felt.
Treating others the way you want to be treated is one way to become magnetic! 🔥🔥🔥
So true!
Ah I know where you're coming from, but I've found when I've done this I've been used and walked over. Can lead to people pleasing I think.
Well what if you dont like people lol
I agree 100%
1. Show interest in people
2. Look people in the eye
3. Let people know that you like them
4. Let yourself be imperfect
5. Point out what you have in common with the other person
6. Don't take yourself too seriously
7. Show up assuming people like you
"We like people who like us." "We are comfortable with people who are comfortable with themselves."
Do you agree Fatima?
@@juliakristinamah yes, I agree completely.
Asking people questions about themselves rather than focusing on myself seems very important. Thanks for the reminder!
glad it helped!
When you are talking to someone about something that bothers you it really moving when you see that the listener really cares. There is a special connection
I couldn't agree more Larry.
I definitely need to work on not being perfect and not assuming people don’t like me.
Big ones, right? One little step everyday is all it takes. You've got this!
“Assume people like you” I will try it tonight! Thank you for such a great video, so easy to understand
Don't forget to fill your pockets with strong magnets.
The one I am going to work on is being more present when listening to people. My mind sometimes drifts off.
Yes! This one is huge.
I have a friend that makes a short story long. He he.
Same here, and it's especially hard to stay focused if they're talking about something that isn't of interest to me. It's something i've been trying to work on and if I catch myself drifting, I try to focus extra hard when I "come back". Curious to know how are you coping with this?
Huh? What was that?
I appreciate when people ask me questions ie “ how did you get involved in that?” “Why did you give that up?” and later they remember details about my answers. People who pay attention and remember are rare, they demonstrate that they aren’t self focused 24/7.
If you can make a person smile or laugh with your sincere, friendly and responsible joking it goes a long way in having people like you. All of your points are right on the mark. Thanks again.
Yassss!! Love this.
Thank you so very much for your kind response. I really appreciate your videos and your feedback. Keep up the good work. You are a credit to your profession.
Julia Kristina Counselling I’m finally learning how to use this phone. I wanted to thank you so very much for your videos and your kind response.
synchromorph there’s no doubt that people can misread non- verbal communication. That is why you never rely on just it before trusting someone. Granted there are people less versed in decifering
Thanks for the thumbs up 👍
The tip I like the best is assuming that people like you. That's just a really great thing to expect in others. Because most of the time I go around thinking people don't like me because this or that or something or other. But the truth is I have no idea whether they like me or not so why not put a positive spin on it and just assume that people do like me and find me quite likeable. Thank you for that shift and that tip I will use it from now on. Thank you Julia have a great day.
I love your mantra, to tell myself that people “like me”! I have a history of anxiety...but I’m slowly becoming more confident and less fearful.
I'm 13 years old, and I have multiple friends my age who are anxious depressed and when I found out about one of my closest friends feeling this way I was so upset. I remember running to my room and crying and crying, welling myself it was all my fault, I wasn't a a good friend and I was good for nothing. I couldn't eat wouldn't speak to my parents. This thing that she has done and she had been through was horrible. That same night I searched in CZcams how I could help her and I found your videos, they helped so much and they gave me such a good guide and Vision of what I can do as a friend. Then after I found my other close friend was in the same position. Once again absolutely horrible. This Chanel helped so much and now I speak to them openly and I'm there for them 24/7. They may not be all fine now but on there way to recovery. Thank you so much.🙏
Sofia Bartholomew you go girl ! So proud of you. You are changing for the better and you did it yourself by researching. You are such a great 13 year old! Wishing you all the best. Much Love..... xoxo
When someone says they appreciate me or acknowledges my expertise, this makes me feel good about myself and my relationship with them. When someone criticizes me and really attacks me, then I have a hard time with this.
Assuming that people like me. That was a great tip because I tend to do the complete opposite. So I'll be more intentional about it. Also, telling people what I like about them. That's great.
I really connected with your last point of changing your mindset to try and assume that someone likes you. A challenging shift when you have a history of people treating you a certain way. You begin to assume that the few who dislike/don’t respect you have a better idea of who you are than the folks who actually show up and listen. It definitely changes the way you show up in spaces with new people. Thanks for this positive challenge.
There is such value in your lessons. Keep them coming. Thanks.
Hey Julia! I would love to watch a video on how to comfort someone when they are feeling sad. I often find myself in this kind of situation, understanding them and wanting to help, but never knowing what to do or say.
1 Be Interested in Other People! Ask Interesting Questions
2 Look people in the Eye ❤️ They feel Seen
Valued
3 Let people know that we LIKE them
4 Let ourselves be Imperfect with boundaries
5 Point out Similarities
6 DO NOT take yourself too seriously
7 Show Up Assuming People LIKE you! More magnetic!❤️
The A & E version is the best, I own it and have watched it countless times. Love your channel, and the way you tell it like it is.
Yasss! Love that we're on the same page with this one ;-) And love having you here Lana.
So glad I'm subscribed :) Thank you!
I'm so glad you're here too Silas!
I've noticed a connection in all of these things you mentioned. Much of it involves treating others with respect in more than one form. Nobody likes an arrogant selfish jerk so being the exact opposite of that can work wonders.
So much value on this channel. Thank you for posting.
Recently someone confessed to me that they always feel better after chatting me up.
I met this person at the gym, after several months of casual talking, we spent some time socializing, meeting each other's friends and bonding. It’s like you say, when you actually listen to people, you learn so much about their world view, their fears, insecurities and I have always tried to articulate or self-express their experience as if to hold up a mirror to them.
Most of the time they understand whatever drama is ongoing in their world is either no big deal, or temporary.
My go to supportive advice is: love yourself and you show up at your best in the world.
Allow things to fall where they may, and assume things turn out nicely.
Btw: Pride and Prejudice and Zombies for the win! :)
Exactly, this has happened with me. Same, sister.
You talk way too much. Are you egotistical?
Great work, Julia! And I think it's also a question of actually being a warm, and yes, loving person. As you clearly are as well.
The one that struck me most was show up assuming people like you. This has been a life long issue. But when I have shown up that way in the past it has worked. Needed a reminder. Thanks Julia!
I like when people introduce new concepts that I have no idea about. I’m going to try and connect with people on things that we have in common. Thank you again for the video.
Thank you Julia for every great video!
I have a very long road to travel. It's so hard to start at zero. Julia gives me hope and strength to at least keep on moving foward. Any journey starts with a first step. Get up when you stumble or fall, force a step when u r frozen, i am not alone out here gives me courage to keep trying. Thank you Julia
This was awesome... I personally think your magnetic... I need to start assuming people like me rather then not for my personal growth and self esteem. I have been working on myself the last year and i left an abusive relationship of almost 15 years. Im still grieving and healing. But building my self esteem in the process. Today, i am particularly sad. Deep sighs 😏.
Wish me the best in my healing process.
Thank you for this - I am taking away from this 2 main things where you have helped ping a lightbulb on for me! 1st The fact you said to show up being intentional about making people feel better by being with you - this helped me see outside of myself and realise that you need to set your mind that you are going to have a positive connection. Getting out of your head and expecting that you will have a positive impact with people you meet gives you a lighter feeling to begin with. 2nd Showing up assuming that people will like you - it sounds so simple! This made me realise how I turn up with angst instead - will people like me? will I make a fool of myself? etc I am starting on the backfoot by doing this and your comment has reset me to realise just turn up expecting the positive and it changes your mind. Thank you! PS Being from the UK, I have to go with the Colin Firth version!
Hey Julia. This is what I am practicing right now, being connected to people around. Thanks for the tips. Love your videos sooo much!
Thank you! I enjoy your videos which I have recently started watching! I find you to be likeable because you come across as approachable with a willingness to share your expertise!💜
Another amazing video Julia
I am drawn to people who speak of how they are striving to do new things in life. It inspires me to do more and is exciting to see people go after their passions.
I am very interested in people (even though I looove talking about myself LOL), and love hearing about their interests! I make a point to compliment people even though I need to make an effort. Sometimes is uncomfortable, BUT I feel it is important (if it's genuine) to let people know. I love the last point, assume people will like you. That helps a lot if you do a lot of networking. In general I feel people are more accomplished than me, which is not always true! Thank you, Julia!
You are absolutely AMAZING! Thank you for this video! As a person with an ADHD I have encountered so many unpleasant situations while trying to connect to people because I struggled to figure out why, and this video really helped me understand not only some of the reasons, but most importantly how do this right, because down inside I always knew I am capable of being this kind of person ❤💙
Learned that principle very young-asking people (non super nosey) questions, and automatically people like you. But the key is if you truly are interested and really listen! Being an intensely curious person about life in general, it was/is obvious how much every single person, needs to be heard, to feel cared for. 🥰
What draws me to others is the same thing I struggle with most on your list-being comfortable with myself. Sometimes I cannot comprehend how people keep showing up after something I feel is embarrassing has happened to them. How do they seem so confident after that big horrible error or incident or whatever? It’s the thing in my self esteem journey that is definitely the biggest struggle.
Another great massage, enjoyed it very much. Thank you
I was encouraged by how many of these points i already do. It affirms i am on track. But eye contact is something i have never been good at so this this the major point i am taking from your vlog. Sharing your experience was very helpful. Thank you
Awesome Stephen! So good for you - and I'm grateful this connected.
Great tips!!
Another great video, thank you!
I like people that have integrity and consistent in the way they behave.I respect honesty
Thank you for this video Julia! I am also a coach, and felt inspired by your video. I think that this is very important to feel magnetic and have the right habits, in order to attract what we want in life! :) Blessings!
New subscriber - love your refreshingly simple (but deep) delivery of your content. Your output is amazing and I look forward to watching more videos. I’d appreciate a link to your friend Scott’s content that you mentioned in this video.
Keep up the amazing work 👍🏼😀
Wow! Great comments! Julia, you really have a great community here in comments section. Respect, Respect, Respect!!!
Right? The best one on CZcams IMHO ;-)
@@juliakristinamah indeed. The best one
I love this! Thank you!
Ahhh - OF COURSE, the A and E version!!! Hello.....Colin Firth!
Yes girl!! Amen to that.
I've only watched like 2 of your videos and I already love them. It's great to hear somebody talk about those things without any sort of negative judgment. I only wish that it had subtitles in other languages because there are some people I might want to show it to but can't. Oh... Wait google translate did get a bit better again. ;)
Julia you have so much positive energy. I love listening to you. Thank you. My big takeaway on this one is assume people like you.
Really liked the practicality of this video. It is a good reminder for me.
Thank you for another great video!
Thank YOU for your support.
Thankyou Julia. Its good to see your happy face.
A genuine smile does it all for me. I also like the whole part about no reason to be perfect. I love crooked teeth for some reason. Not too crooked, but that slight imperfection is so endearing. I live in Austin and it's like having perfect teeth is the norm around here. Show me something crooked and belt out a crooked smile. Pretend like we're in Doncaster or summit.. Then it gets fun! Thanks for this video please keep em coming!
Yes,I believe that I made myself a magnetic persona to work toward being myself and worked on Alignment like first started loving myself the way I am felt gratitude for everything God has given me after that gradually I started educating myself about self grooming,polished,learned good etiquettes,hygiene,having immaculate looks/ personality ,started given importance to orthers to listen them rather speaking much about myself .n just being with myself ,get job. Be proactive n creative ,so those things people made them drive toward me n get crazy to know aniyt me about my busy schedule.be genuine ,honest ,reliable
I love David Burns!! He has an amazing podcast called Feeling Good. He is so good. Thank you for this video. You are incredible 😍❤️
I didn't even know! I'm going right now to check it out.
♡ I really love this positive content! fun!
Reminds me of the concept of Synergy, where two or more people have a common goal theyre all working on combined with positive energy. Also I find when someone is loving and appreciating themselves, it shows up.
Really listening to someone that talks to me looking them in the eye, and not getting distracted by other things.
Yes! it goes such a long ways, doesn't it?
I like people who make eye contact, speak clearly & engage.
Have been meaning to tell you how much I appreciate your deleting "crap" from your introduction. That word had an unpleasant sting to it. P.S. I like your videos, your enthusiasm, and presence. Thank you!!
That's funny Cheryl - I've had several people message me telling me how much they miss it! Goes to show you can never please everyone, so make sure you do what feels right for you ;-)
I agree with you. I think the word “crap” undermines the powerful content of these videos. Otherwise I truly love them and have referred them to many people. We love you Julia!
I really like you!!! Great info. Thanks
I like people who are honest no matter if it’s something good or bad, i always try to be honest, some like it some don’t but I’m authentic to myself
first and others second.
Julia, I love your voice and your methods of teaching, your awesome,
Awesome!
If you're authentic, then you are leaving yourself unguarded to being hurt, or used, or taken advantage of. I USED to be quite a smiley happy confident person, then something happened (I can't remember what), and I became well know for NEVER smiling, and having a 'stony' or expressionless face. I still do. It's a self preservation method. Apparently, I've been told I'm handsome, but because of my suppression of any outward form of emotion, whenever a woman smiles at/flirts with me, I just stare blankly at her, half out of unwillingness to be crushed, half out of being unable to turn on any emotions. I'm kind of a wreck.
I have not seen Pride and prejudiced I will watch both of them and you remind me of the most incredible woman in the world she saved my life she was my social worker I would not embarrass her by mentioning her name but I think about her everyday and when I started listening to you you reminded me of her because she cared I may have saved a man's life if I was not here he might not be either but he went from a blue color to
smiling
It was a beautiful smile like a babies
My husband is very magnetic because he is an amazing encourager and knows how to build people up. I want so much to become more like him in this area.
Your up lifting thank you
I laughed at the keira Knightley version kind of person 😂 felt like i was called out or smth because i am that person, but kidding aside these are all great and insightful inputs 🙏💗
We were just watching the A&E Version on TV.( This past weekend) II love Colin Firth. My daughter is also reading the book. I love that story.
Oh my gosh, just thinking about it warms my heart!
Hey there! I am attracted to broad-minded people, good sense of humor, good listeners and generally do not take themselves and life too seriously, but most of all I am attracted to those who like me as I am
Excellent !!!!
I love the A & E version of Pride and Prejudice. I love all the Jane Austin things that I’ve watched. I’ve always been a hopeless romantic. That is one thing that attracts me to people. .
Would appreciate like people still remember what u share or problem after awhile (2 weeks later ) , they will ask u back how was it ... so warm
You seem very likeable Julia. I like your videos. You seem very genuine.😊👍❤
Thank you”
Thank you! You made me realize one more time that I don't have to have the 'true answer' to a question that is impossible for me to answer which is known by someone else.
When there is a question like this, I should choose the answer that makes me feel happy/good! Because since I don't know the true answer, it can be true too!
So that I can be happy, my mind can be free!
Damn... Thanks. xD
Really glad it helped!
i like people that make life seem easy. i like people that are warm. i like people that are interested. i like people who actually listen.
Thinking thah other person likes you makes difference in thr way we show up with him!!
Thanks
I think when I am well, I already am a magnetic person. I think this is because I pay attention to people when they talk, and they know I listen to what they say because my responses aren't generic responses, and they know if I care about what they say, because I go above and beyond to try to think of solutions to their problems. Or if I don't care what they say, I just say so, and I think in a way that makes me a magnetic person too, because it results in people knowing that I say what I think, which can be uncomfortable, but is refreshing. Also I am refreshing because I am totally open about the things I have been through, the things I know or understand, and also the things I don't. In short, I think my well self is magnetic because I am so very different from most people. It makes my life difficult, but I wouldn't change myself. What makes me different makes me wonderful.
Everybody loves me!!! Lol that's my take away. I love all of these
One plus side of my limited capacity for theory of mind... I don't show up assuming people like me, but it doesn't generally occur to me that people might like me or not, and because of my limited social functioning, even if it occurs to me, I rarely care if they like me or not.
Great video as always, thank you Julia xD!
Also, off-topic, but I do wonder why you use the videos as a black/white color - but but, but watching it like this just makes me feel comfortable in some ways (dunno how to describe it), just wondering what's the psychology behind it o.o
I like you Julia.I learn a lot from your videos
Something tells me Julia's good at taking her own advice...
I try Chris! But am far from perfect ;-)
Julia Kristina Counselling , you are just amazing! The way you communicate shows your thought process and who you are! There is this grace that is obvious from the screen
I've had to remove negative people from my life. It was sometimes hard but worked out for the best.
Showing up knowing I am likeable enough have a right to be happy here today riding and spending time with my wonderful equine and canine friends. They can’t run away
Julia Christina, you should do a show on detoxing from addiction to politics, also on addictions to social media.
Sort of along the lines of looking people in the eye, I feel really seen and validated when people use my name when talking to me (not too much of course). But I try to practice this in my life.
Love the version with Colin Firth too🤩🥰
Whenever I show that I am depressed and vulnerable around people, even if I don't mean to, I alienate people. I get dirty looks. Mean behavior. People lash out at me because I have depression even though I try very hard not to complain and be positive, make the best of it. I feel so lonely and isolated. People only want something to do with me when I'm on a winning streak, accomplishing things, or have some bit of fortunate. It's so painful.
Love your energy and enthusiasm and good information
Take care Julia
Will be watching all you do on this channel
Cheers from Australia
Great to connect with you Ronald, and really happy you found it helpful. Cheers from Canada!
So happy I found this one! Unicorn :)
I found the last one very interesting - fake it till you make it I guess, will test it out.
Nice
I am tired of trying...what meant to be is going to be
Same here man. Dont blame u.
@@JoshKSimmsK thank you,may God bless us all
We all need time to rest. That's for sure.
@@juliakristinamah thank you 💜💚
Resting is fine, take your time dude. No need to rush :)