Why you shouldn't vent anger (according to science and philosophy)

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  • čas přidán 31. 05. 2024
  • We celebrate and even glamorize anger as a society. But should we believe the hype? This video shows why we shouldn’t vent anger and why we’re better off preventing and reducing this emotion altogether.
    Video: Why you shouldn't vent anger (according to science and philosophy)
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    #angermanagement #anger #buddhism
    00:00 Introduction
    01:53 A philosophy of anger
    06:02 The science of venting
    10:33 Arousal-decreasing activities

Komentáře • 706

  • @DrSulikSquirrel
    @DrSulikSquirrel Před 14 dny +228

    "When angry count to ten before you speak. If very angry, count to one hundred." -- Thomas Jefferson

  • @kobinsadvance
    @kobinsadvance Před 14 dny +411

    I think Einzelgänger is a mind-reader, whenever I deal with a particular issue, he post a video on that topic right away. Blessed to have you in the CZcams Philosophy Community. 🙏

    • @blakelatta7910
      @blakelatta7910 Před 14 dny +8

      No doubt! 🙏

    • @nateb4749
      @nateb4749 Před 14 dny +10

      literally this is something i have been fixated on thinking about for several days. it’s insane

    • @nateb4749
      @nateb4749 Před 14 dny +1

      literally this is something i have been fixated on thinking about for several days. it’s insane

    • @cstone3178
      @cstone3178 Před 14 dny +8

      It is really creepy! I just blew up at someone; I go to youtube and what is the first video in the cue? Was Einzelgänger listening???😉 Well, perfect timing with a very helpful message. 🙏🙏🙏

    • @TheNimbleEnigma
      @TheNimbleEnigma Před 14 dny +2

      Same thing here. Amazing timing.

  • @zaozao48
    @zaozao48 Před 14 dny +115

    I let my anger out at my co worker once. I felt nothing but regret. Every time I get angry, I try to remind myself how I felt during that moment. Now, I have better control over it. In fact, I don't think I had an angry outburst since.

    • @Andrew-zr1jt
      @Andrew-zr1jt Před 14 dny +5

      Good point there , after the incident comes the regret👍

    • @howaboutno2023
      @howaboutno2023 Před 14 dny +1

      🙏🏾

    • @NinjaChoke
      @NinjaChoke Před 14 dny

      Like a week ago?🤣

    • @ebert8756
      @ebert8756 Před 11 dny +1

      exactly . nothing but regret. no catharsis. lesson learned 👌💪

    • @mrsnamucheers5412
      @mrsnamucheers5412 Před 11 dny +1

      Good to hear, I still strugling to keep my anger these days😢

  • @elFuego00
    @elFuego00 Před 14 dny +87

    Vegeta is a perfect example of this. Vegeta had above average skill level and constantly trained hard to get better. As powerful as he was he was held back by his anger. In his hard battles he often showed a hard outburst but always short lived and the calmer opponent won the fight. Goku was more relaxed and jovial in his day to day and took things less serious. Is why I believe he had more energy to put towards when it came time to fighting and training. Goku was the most powerful character because of this. If your body is always in fight or flight your brain is not able to put the same amount of energy on other things. Staying calm in the middle of a storm. Not letting the external affect your internal. Than your internal has more energy to put external. Great video as always. Many blessings to all 🙏🏾

    • @LiminalLion
      @LiminalLion Před 9 dny +2

      Bringing the real life examples. I like that.

    • @BV-xc3qz
      @BV-xc3qz Před 7 dny +1

      I fux wit this

    • @zhouyu6557
      @zhouyu6557 Před 6 dny +1

      Goku's anger at the death of Krillen is what allowed him to become a Super Saiyan thus giving him the power to defeat Freiza. Gohan's anger turned the tide of the battle against Raditz and again against Cell. If we're going to explore the effects of anger in the DBZ universe, we have to look at all characters not just Vegeta.

    • @Elias-jg6zl
      @Elias-jg6zl Před 3 dny

      Vegeta glazer

  • @annesummers09
    @annesummers09 Před 14 dny +47

    I always feel awful and stupid when I have an anger outburst. I always regret I didn't handle it calmly. I feel out of control and stupid for letting someone push my buttons. The older I get, the more I feel so much better when I don't over-react in these situations. I feel better just walking away when I have the choice to do so. Wish I'd learned this long ago.

    • @tomg6318
      @tomg6318 Před 13 dny +4

      Yes, and the one trying to make you angry is satisfied when they're successful, and dissatisfied when they're not

    • @melodybaoin1425
      @melodybaoin1425 Před 2 dny

      Perhaps it comes with our environment. I grew up with a family who has to raise their voice when they disagree or confront some kind of conflict. They did tell me not to get angry but they don't show me how. In the end, I get easily agitated in any shortcomings. Hopefully, I will become more calmer in time.

  • @LordBrittish
    @LordBrittish Před 14 dny +116

    As an adult with ADHD, anger and I are old frenemies.
    Emotional disregulation is a demon we must wrestle with all our lives.
    * I actually like shooting my bow 🏹 as a stress reliever. I don’t see it so much as violence, but I picture it as holding something tight, like a negative feeling, and then releasing it.

    • @brianschwarm8267
      @brianschwarm8267 Před 14 dny +8

      I had a lot of anger issues when I was on adderall and they disappeared entirely when I got off it. Something to consider if you’re medicating. I learned to cope with ADHD without my meds and I am much happier

    • @LordBrittish
      @LordBrittish Před 14 dny

      @@brianschwarm8267 Oh absolutely! My anger management was worse when I was on adderall. I have been traditionally unmedicated most of my life. Big Pharma calls it “self medicating” and doesn’t like the idea of people growing their medicine in their backyards,🌴 (I don’t do that, I am rubbish at growing plants) and Big Pharma (or money) controls a few of this world’s politicians.
      Reminds me of a grouchy old wizard I know of who preached that magic was good and all, but the world runs on money. 💰

    • @JoeOG
      @JoeOG Před 14 dny

      Emotional disregulation is a demon we with ADHD must CONQUER. Trust me, it is possible. To say that "we" as people with ADHD have to wrestle with emotional dysregulation our whole lives implies that there is something wrong with us, and that we are permanently stuck that way. That simply isn't true, is disempowering and misleading, and is rooted in victim mentality. I'm not judging you, just trying to dispel ignorance. I believed the same way for a very long time. The truth is that YOU have the power to overcome your emotional disregulation. YOU are strong, creative, sensitive, intelligent and capable.
      I was diagnosed with ADD at age 10 and have been on and off stimulant meds until I decided to stop permanently a year ago. I switched to drinking green tea instead of coffee too. Stimulants do not help regulate your emotions (on the contrary), they only help you dissociate from them temporarily. I learned how to regulate my emotions and nervous system through lifestyle & diet changes, somatic therapy, yoga and meditation. Now most of the downsides of having ADHD are easily manageable for me and I became a coach to help others do the same. Don't give up hope brother.

    • @JoeOG
      @JoeOG Před 14 dny +1

      Emotional disregulation is a demon we must CONQUER*. Saying that we with ADHD must "wrestle with all our lives" is simply not true, is disempowering, and is rooted in victim mentality. It implies that we are born broken, and there's nothing we can do except take hard drugs to manage it.I'm not judging you, just trying to dispel ignorance. I believed the same for a long time because I let my parents and others in authority convince me that there was something permanently wrong with me. It's sad that this persists today with so much evidence to the contrary. ADHD is simply a result of being born with a sensitive nervous system and experiencing overstimulation, chaos and trauma that is practically inevitable in modern life. YOU have the power to regulate your emotions and nervous system. You are wise, calm, creative, intelligent capable, sensitive, and in control of your emotions
      I was diagnosed with ADD at age 10 and have been on and off stimulant medications for 20 years. I decided to stop permanently one year ago. I also switched from coffee to green tea. The truth is that stimulants do not help regulate your emotions (on the contrary), they only help dissociate from them temporarily. I learned to regulate my emotions and nervous system through introspection, journaling, somatic therapy, yoga and meditation. Now the downsides of my so-called "ADHD" are minimal and easily manageable. I became a coach so I could help other people do the same, with or without ADHD. Don't give up hope brother, you can overcome this demon.

    • @JoeOG
      @JoeOG Před 14 dny

      Emotional disregulation is a demon we must CONQUER*. Saying that we with ADHD must "wrestle with all our lives" is simply not true, is disempowering, and is rooted in victim mentality. It implies that we are born broken, and there's nothing we can do except take hard drugs to manage it.I'm not judging you, just trying to dispel ignorance. I believed the same for a long time because I let my parents and others in authority convince me that there was something permanently wrong with me. It's sad that this persists today with so much evidence to the contrary. ADHD is simply a result of being born with a sensitive nervous system and experiencing overstimulation, chaos and trauma that is practically inevitable in modern life. YOU have the power to regulate your emotions and nervous system. You are wise, calm, creative, intelligent capable, sensitive, and in control of your emotions
      I was diagnosed with ADD at age 10 and have been on and off stimulant medications for 20 years. I decided to stop permanently one year ago. I also switched from coffee to green tea. The truth is that stimulants do not help regulate your emotions (on the contrary), they only help dissociate from them temporarily. I learned to regulate my emotions and nervous system through introspection, journaling, somatic therapy, yoga and meditation. Now the downsides of my so-called "ADHD" are minimal and easily manageable. I became a coach so I could help other people do the same, with or without ADHD. Don't give up hope brother, you can overcome this demon.

  • @dvdv8197
    @dvdv8197 Před 14 dny +98

    A Vegeta appeared in the thumbnail... It's super effective!

  • @kingdomwithin4450
    @kingdomwithin4450 Před 14 dny +37

    I like anger. Not all the time, just every now and then. I think it’s part of being human. I try to channel my anger as motivation for working harder.

    • @splabbity
      @splabbity Před 12 dny +3

      As long as you're not hammering nails!

    • @Jay_Hendrix
      @Jay_Hendrix Před 2 dny +1

      I agree but replace anger with hate
      I think hate makes us human
      But "hate is a strong word" they say
      We're gaslit into rejecting our hate
      I believe this generates anger
      I believe anger is imperfect hate

  • @simpatico4004
    @simpatico4004 Před 13 dny +20

    Not sure I particularly agree with everything said, my man. Personally I find that physical activities have made me better at regulating my emotions, particularly running. In essence, I find when I routinely incorporate these into my day, I rarely arrive at anger in the first place, and are more likely to approach stress with a sense of poise and reason. If I’m misled by the emotion, then again it returns me to my center, where I can dispel the emotion with logic and reason.

    • @TheMegaMrMe
      @TheMegaMrMe Před 9 dny +3

      I think he is talking about only going running as a result of an anger triggering event. That would be just a coping mechanism. What you are describing is probably already a habit. Doing regular physical activity will decrease stress levels in the first place so that you can be more mindful. then you don't get angry in the first place

  • @drhmufti
    @drhmufti Před 14 dny +85

    Anger is one thing but it isn't healthy to keep bottling things up. Swearing (as long as it is not focussed at someone) has a number of benefits! Unexpressed anger breeds resentment. There is such a thing as healthy anger- telling people when they are taking the piss is important so that you aren't treated as a doormat.

    • @arthurb1191
      @arthurb1191 Před 14 dny +3

      Thats all im saying. ❤

    • @AdamOwenBrowning
      @AdamOwenBrowning Před 14 dny +25

      Venting implies it's bottled up and needs to be, well, vented. Calmly expressing your issue with something as it arises is very different to venting.
      In short - balance! Balance in everything.

    • @arthurb1191
      @arthurb1191 Před 14 dny +3

      @@AdamOwenBrowning when you present it this way, it does sound alot more conscious and thoughtful❤️Respect❤️

    • @parth6115
      @parth6115 Před 14 dny +1

      Don't supress any emotion but instead give forgiveness for your peace

    • @RyanWizner
      @RyanWizner Před 13 dny +10

      Maybe I'm misinterpreting the video, but I'm thinking that the studies are showing that "bottled up anger" or "repressing anger" isn't actually a thing. The healthy alternative is hard work since it requires rewiring our brains to remain calm in the moment and breathe and let it pass. Lately when faced with hard moments of infuriating morons I've been reflecting on the insignificance of this moment, this person, and how much it won't matter 1,000 years from now, or probably even 1 year from now. This video and it's studies seem to be reinforcing it. Humans aren't as advanced as we think we are and we have a lot of work to do, I'm rewiring my brain to think that children act out, and adults have created skills to move through anger calmly and properly.

  • @mintakan003
    @mintakan003 Před 14 dny +24

    Anger is probably a surface symptom for something else. Oftentimes, this could be fear. Along with this, many other things.

    • @jonathanrandall4140
      @jonathanrandall4140 Před 14 dny +6

      Anger is often depression turned outwards

    • @tbeartom4855
      @tbeartom4855 Před 9 dny +1

      Realized recently for me it was fear, anger pushed me away from my family and friends, gave me a justification to avoid my fear which was just some social awkwardness. So much strife for so little reward. Once i let it go and just faced my fear, it dissolved in a moment when i saw how it had warped my perception.

    • @yayhandles
      @yayhandles Před 5 dny +1

      Most likely depression, particularly in males. Angry guy is almost definitely also sad guy. Sad guy is much more likely to become angry guy.

  • @johnoakley6362
    @johnoakley6362 Před 14 dny +21

    Anger has always been a problem for me, I have calmed down over the years compared to my younger years, but it does come out now and then. Hearing the negatives about anger, I must add that it can sometimes be positive. Twice in my life, my life has been in danger, and my anger has saved my life. The first occasion was when a person ran up behind me as I was walking home in the early hours, with the intention of robbing me. He hit me over the head with a metal bar, then tried to stab me with a knife. He failed to fell me, I snatched the metal bar from him, and battered him until he was unconscious and bloodied, and no further threat to me. The second occasion was an industrial accident, where I was trapped under some very heavy machinery, had I not lost my temper, which gave me the strength to remove the machinery from off my body, then I would most likely had perished, as no-one else was around to help me. Sometimes anger saves life.

    • @blackmonarch2380
      @blackmonarch2380 Před 14 dny +4

      As it is a tool of fear , it helps us to survive. Awesome take.

    • @toryburke137
      @toryburke137 Před 12 dny

      ​@@blackmonarch2380a tool of fear? That's sounds like a weasel take. Not getting angry is the tool of fear. Being scared to put lessers in their place or punch them in the face comes from the fear of this bitch made society causing trouble in our lives. It's too many weak people saying anger is bad but it's okay for evil to go unfettered by the anger less.

  • @mikec5603
    @mikec5603 Před 14 dny +7

    Burnout.. working non stop for 10-12-14-16-18 hrs can generate a short fuse as our capacity to take on additional stress is substantialy reduced. Thats why rest, meditation, breathing exercises, sleep, taking a naps just laying down and relaxing can reduce the sensitivity to stress from outside factors and increase our capacity to take on more stress

  • @brianschwarm8267
    @brianschwarm8267 Před 14 dny +107

    I have read in a psychology journal that venting reinforces our brain to get to a state that needs venting in the future because venting feels good. Almost like a smoker smoking cigarettes. They create an environment in their body that reinforces getting that fix.

    • @turtleanton6539
      @turtleanton6539 Před 14 dny

      Yeeeh😊

    • @__-tz6xx
      @__-tz6xx Před 14 dny +3

      I have been venting lately. This is a great reminder that I should stop and accept stillness.

    • @muyscully
      @muyscully Před 14 dny +2

      I agree with this… venting is needing someone else to validate your anger… if you can validate it yourself, you can let it go

    • @Contribute_TakeCare_Learn_Play
      @Contribute_TakeCare_Learn_Play Před 14 dny +2

      Another reason showing that common sense is no proof in an argument. Science needs to provide it

    • @Emi-hn7ff
      @Emi-hn7ff Před 14 dny +1

      Would ypu perhaps share the journal you got that from? I'd be interested to read into that myself.

  • @PWizz91
    @PWizz91 Před 14 dny +2

    Man I remember this guy with 80k subs …. Wild!

  • @manioommen871
    @manioommen871 Před 7 dny +2

    Sometimes in this world, if we dont get angry in some occasions people will take advantage of us.
    Anger is an emotion to be used wisely with control.

  • @timefly4221
    @timefly4221 Před 14 dny +6

    If anger were solely negative and had no benefits, it would not exist according to evolutionary psychology. So I think it is necessary to understand anger in both a positive and negative way, and to learn to harness the positive aspects and control or eliminate the negative ones.

    • @blackmonarch2380
      @blackmonarch2380 Před 14 dny +1

      As it is a tool, like all things in life, nothing should be wasted in use and potential.

    • @nateb4485
      @nateb4485 Před 6 dny +1

      We crave sugar and technically it has a benefit, but we are better off without it, just because something has a use doesnt mean there isnt a better way to do things.

  • @George1966ism
    @George1966ism Před 11 dny +5

    Freud also writes that blocked emotion, nevrosis can be released by humour. Laughter is just as relieving as anger and the better way.

  • @Julie-un7nk
    @Julie-un7nk Před 14 dny +53

    Letting anger out is something you should do very judiciously.

    There are times when nothing else will get the job done, sad though it may be.

    The trick is realizing that using anger to achieve your ends is the personal emotional equivalent of smashing the emergency glass.

    It should only ever be a last resort

  • @Pantherazure
    @Pantherazure Před 14 dny +34

    In Buddhism they say like: those who fully come to terms with the fact of their eventual death, all their conflicts, enmities, resentments are silenced. Something like that.
    It is a profoundly liberating statement and simultaneously a very depressing one. Don't know which is more.
    Another brilliant and thought provoking video Einzelganger bro. Thank You.

    • @coolbreeze5683
      @coolbreeze5683 Před 14 dny +2

      I love the Buddhist perspective on this. The concepts of impermanence and surrender have helped me a lot

    • @Uriel-Septim.
      @Uriel-Septim. Před 14 dny +5

      "Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die"
      - Buddha.

    • @horednaxela6919
      @horednaxela6919 Před 14 dny +2

      Memento mori

    • @Novastar.SaberCombat
      @Novastar.SaberCombat Před 14 dny +1

      Time is the only resource.
      🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
      "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
      🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
      --Diamond Dragons (book I)

    • @souhailfellaki9289
      @souhailfellaki9289 Před 13 dny

      @@coolbreeze5683 All religion have the same view, they all say that u should hold ur anger

  • @SitaVanna
    @SitaVanna Před 11 dny +4

    "To be angry at others, you must first resist your own unpleasant feelings" - Hillside Hermitage

    • @Bhadh
      @Bhadh Před dnem

      Can u explain please???
      I Dint get it..

  • @SamuelTeddy-kq3oz
    @SamuelTeddy-kq3oz Před 14 dny +9

    I've been venting my anger my entire life. It really hurts my own self. Thank you man for posting this video. There's been certain times where I give in to my own anger, and I regretted it all. Theres nothing good in anger. And thats why today I will try my very best to live an anger free life.

    • @Novastar.SaberCombat
      @Novastar.SaberCombat Před 14 dny

      It's the same as "being happy". Neither achieve any tangible result. Instead, get sheet DONE. The end, 'n that's it. 💪😎✌️
      🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
      "Before I start, I must see my end. Destination known, my mind's journey now begins. Upon my chariot, heart and soul's fate revealed. In time, all points converge, hope's strength resteeled. But to earn final peace at the universe's endless refrain, we must see all in nothingness... before we start again."
      🐲✨🐲✨🐲✨
      --Diamond Dragons (book I)

    • @goych
      @goych Před 14 dny +1

      Anger is life force fella, I blocked mine for my whole life and scared myself silly about venting it, it was utter bollocks, it’s just energy moving through, although we as a society have learnt to suppress it, that and the other emotions of course!

  • @Unidentified_userr
    @Unidentified_userr Před 14 dny +5

    As someone going through an anger filled situation right now, this video helped me a ton. I've been venting to my friends about it and it starts to make me angry all over again. It started to feel like a vicious cycle, I'm so glad I found this video.

  • @theinnerlight8016
    @theinnerlight8016 Před 14 dny +29

    If you don't control your emotions, your emotions control you.

    • @Herpetile
      @Herpetile Před 14 dny

      emotions control you because that is being human... it takes quite a lot of mindfulness to keep a logical brain about oneself all the time.

    • @Herpetile
      @Herpetile Před 14 dny

      @John-PaulHunt-wy7lf More like be gone Moon!

  • @officialjeremiahblake
    @officialjeremiahblake Před 13 dny +3

    This channel has helped me more than anything

  • @dvdv8197
    @dvdv8197 Před 14 dny +9

    Since I'm early, let me take the time to thank you for all the marvelous insights you've given us over the years.
    It's very much appreciated. 👍👏🙏🙏

  • @rosemary4608
    @rosemary4608 Před 14 dny +3

    I’ve always been angry since I was a little child it’s all I know even around myself
    I don’t think venting it out ever helps
    But I also never knew how to not be angry
    I don’t have outbursts anymore it’s just all inside me not going away
    I will try meditation and mindfulness

  • @armatian
    @armatian Před 13 dny +1

    I can only agree but it is very nuanced, expressing might look like venting but verbalizing without screaming helps me process things with reason and logic and find many times that ilogic thougths or expectations emerge from those bursts, allowing me to think beyond the moment and deal with the experience.

  • @noseefood1943
    @noseefood1943 Před 14 dny +3

    When anger swells I tell myself we’re all gonna die and return to the nothingness forever then everything seems trivial

    • @scotleoqueen704
      @scotleoqueen704 Před 4 dny

      Exactly! In 100 yrs, none of our human nonsense is gonna matter 😅 it DOES put a lot of things in perspective

  • @ephraimwinslow
    @ephraimwinslow Před 14 dny +24

    Letting anger out is something you should do very judiciously.
    There are times when nothing else will get the job done, sad though it may be.
    The trick is realizing that using anger to achieve your ends is the personal emotional equivalent of smashing the emergency glass.
    It should only ever be a last resort.

    • @transitionshotline
      @transitionshotline Před 14 dny +1

      Venting is part of the process, it lets off some of the pressure so that the rest is easier to deal with. It's OK to vent, but probably on one's own.

    • @anotherwea6692
      @anotherwea6692 Před 14 dny +3

      I agree. Whilst it may be true it has some good uses in the right condition, it may be too uncommon of an ocurrance for it to be generally recomendable

    • @ephraimwinslow
      @ephraimwinslow Před 14 dny +1

      @@transitionshotline
      ...Your channel name makes everything you just said so sus.

    • @arthurb1191
      @arthurb1191 Před 14 dny

      @@ephraimwinslowokay and? Are you actually going to engage with the content of what he’s saying or?❤

    • @ephraimwinslow
      @ephraimwinslow Před 14 dny +1

      @@arthurb1191
      Nope.
      Just like how that extraneous emoji ruled you out of the serious discussion column.

  • @alexandersage967
    @alexandersage967 Před 14 dny +1

    Science actually backs physical release of intense emotions through things like exercise and cathartic yelling

  • @magueysunset
    @magueysunset Před 14 dny +4

    Anger is nothing to be ashamed of. It comes from a place of wanting security and safety. Unhealthy anger is terrible though. The meditation book called 30 Days to Overcome Anger by Harper Daniels was helpful for me. Anger can be a great teacher if observed and not responded to with negativity.

    • @xbemos
      @xbemos Před 14 dny +2

      Nothing to be ashamed of? It’s a low level fight or flight emotion that shows weakness of character not strength and hurts others because the person with anger can’t control their own reality. A practice of control and dominance. It is shameful.
      Observation is necessary yes. Until it no longer exists.

    • @magueysunset
      @magueysunset Před 14 dny

      @@xbemos Anger is a primal emotion, nothing to be ashamed of. It's being unable to accept it or directing it at one's self or others in the form of blame that is toxic.

    • @xbemos
      @xbemos Před 12 dny +1

      @@magueysunset that’s a train of thought that most spiritual practices would not agree w. It’s primal yes. But the entire goal of evolution is to overcome weaknesses of flesh.

  • @MrSkypelessons
    @MrSkypelessons Před 14 dny +6

    I love the Stoics - Seneca's essay on anger is fantastic, and Epictetus is incredibly compelling. Nonetheless, I also love Chekhov's beautifully presented criticism of the Stoics in 'Ward Number 6'. It's only a short story, but a very powerful one, and for me, it is the best argument against Stoicism. Have a read if you like to challenge your beliefs

  • @lathanielulofoshio7889
    @lathanielulofoshio7889 Před 14 dny +2

    A good quote my medic just told me. " It is perhaps most necessary to have patience whenever we do no want to have patience". I am trying to calm myself right now. Petty people with petty problems.

  • @coolbreeze5683
    @coolbreeze5683 Před 14 dny +2

    This is a great topic. I've always been told to go workout or do something physical if I'm angry about something. I started linking those activities with my angry feelings and that bred more aggressive feelings.
    Talking through why I'm angry with someone or learning to put the anger into perspective in my mind seems to re-train my brain to go into calming mode instead of jumping to aggressive forms of venting.

  • @TonyWKoo
    @TonyWKoo Před 14 dny +5

    Hi, I don’t know if you read all these comments, but I’ve found that exercise is a great way to deal with anger, frustration and anxiety. I try to exercise at least 30 min every day.
    It’s been shown that prehistorically, human beings used to be physically active all day long. It’s how we were meant to be. But now, we don’t. And so, our stress hormones build up instead of being used for what it was originally intended, which is to work out your stress hormones through physical activity.

  • @felipegalindo181
    @felipegalindo181 Před 14 dny +3

    I have always dealt with anger as long as I can remember, and I used to think that venting anger was the best way to deal with it (even psychiatrist recommended to me) but I can tell you that after screaming and shouting I always felt a deep feeling of regret and shame. Anger can make anyone do or say something that can seriously harm others and themselves, I can tell you that by experience. Overtime I believe I have made some progress and improvements in this area, it all comes down to the simple realization of "There is not a single problem that can be solved by anger, but any problem can be made worst by it".

    • @goych
      @goych Před 14 dny

      What the fuck are you even talking about? Why can’t I be angry if I’m fucking angry? Who says it’s not healthy to express? It’s just the reality of the moment, denying it is utter madness

  • @nathanolds6863
    @nathanolds6863 Před 14 dny +2

    I’m so grateful that you make captions for these videos.

  • @beckhambrooklynpenza1708
    @beckhambrooklynpenza1708 Před 14 dny +2

    A Vegeta thumbnail on an Einzelganger video? Today’s my lucky day

  • @armorbearer9702
    @armorbearer9702 Před 14 dny +1

    I notice the media that portrays anger positive is action movies. In those movies and tv shows, direct confrontation is the solution. In other genres, anger produces mixed results.

  • @bboyneon92
    @bboyneon92 Před 14 dny +2

    The Timing timing timing! Of this release!
    Thank you!

  • @bugsbunny4698
    @bugsbunny4698 Před 13 dny +2

    ❤❤❤ You won't believe how much I needed this video - right now! Thank you so much.

  • @CryptoC4T
    @CryptoC4T Před 14 dny +16

    Maybe because of ADHD but for me without physical outlet it is difficult to calm down. Telling someone who will involuntarily throw next object to "just calm down" is like telling a bullet to "just stop". In my experience it is better to work on not getting angry over small things then at controlling the anger.

    • @xbemos
      @xbemos Před 14 dny +1

      💯 friend

    • @a.b1266
      @a.b1266 Před 11 dny

      You will never be punished FOR your anger, but you will always be punished BY your anger.
      One must understand that until they can rule their mind, it will rule them.

  • @Tiermus
    @Tiermus Před 14 dny +17

    Also.. you shouldn't keep anger inside of you (according to science and philosophy). Moderation is the key.

    • @leonkennedy3398
      @leonkennedy3398 Před 14 dny +7

      Yep. Very unhealthy to suppress emotions. Suppressed anger can actually turn into chronic pain

    • @arthurb1191
      @arthurb1191 Před 14 dny +1

      @@leonkennedy3398THANK YOU❤ according to most of the comments, you’re wrong for feeling this way. Ain’t that a lil off?

    • @user-xj2gk2ym2l
      @user-xj2gk2ym2l Před 14 dny

      Science is corrupted and sold.

    • @joannaedwards6325
      @joannaedwards6325 Před 14 dny +2

      ​@@leonkennedy3398
      But...vice versa....
      Expressing too much anger too often also may cause physical
      and/or mental problems.
      Nonreaction
      equals ✌

    • @leonkennedy3398
      @leonkennedy3398 Před 14 dny

      @joannaedwards6325 you're letting built up anger out. But you should also not let every little thing anger you. A good balance

  • @enhmurron
    @enhmurron Před 14 dny +1

    I'm so glad for that video.
    Live Happily

  • @jamesward5721
    @jamesward5721 Před 14 dny +1

    Every time you lose it, you lose. Stay cool, calm & collect. Mae West said it best.

  • @terrychris466
    @terrychris466 Před 14 dny

    Fascinating. Thank you for this valuable knowledge.

  • @wolfo11
    @wolfo11 Před 14 dny +1

    I have a complicated history with anger. While I've been aware of the harmful nature of anger, I didn't know more about it until now. Thanks for posting!

  • @felixhampe6480
    @felixhampe6480 Před 13 dny

    Thank you so much for making this video. Really shines a different light on how to deal with Anger.

  • @runswithraptors
    @runswithraptors Před 14 dny +7

    I enjoy the increasing quality of video production 😁

  • @SallyFenauxBarleycorn
    @SallyFenauxBarleycorn Před 13 dny

    Thank u! Another awesome video

  • @DCM68W
    @DCM68W Před 14 dny +2

    Incredibly helpful as always. Accessible, profound insights with top-shelf video and script editing. Absolute respect for viewer time, but more than that. I'm talking myself into a tshirt purchase

  • @abandonment
    @abandonment Před 14 dny +1

    seeing this video felt so timely because i just listening to Marshall B. Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication series and he shared this belief that anger only leads to more violence, but i think his belief is that anger isn't a bad thing to experience inherently, but that it's a signal to oneself that a need of theirs is not being fulfilled, and they should take it as an opportunity to deconstruct that internally so they can later approach others in a more compassionate way

  • @michaelconnolly7681
    @michaelconnolly7681 Před 10 dny

    What an excellent video. Another excellent video. Such an amazing channel.

  • @NaqrSeranvis
    @NaqrSeranvis Před 14 dny +2

    How about dealing with anger by engaging in activities that require a lot of attention so you literally have to divert your attention from anger to something else?
    Like "Sorry, anger, I don't have time for you"

  • @kigalbert
    @kigalbert Před 14 dny +1

    Excellent video. I wonder if some of this can be extrapolated to other emotions like sadness or anxiety. It’s surprising how popular a therapist with a masters degree will tell you to hit a pillow. It’s no wonder why some things are the way they are, seems discouraging. I have found that knowing my suffering from anger is a choice, wanting not to have the feeling last more than it has too and manual labor help, along with music. I agree with the stoic and buddhist stance on the subject. Those two ways of thought, plus taoism, have helped me tremendously overcome my rage episodes. Taking that one second before reacting is practicing my freedom.
    As always, thank you for the video, I appreciate it.

  • @ministerofjoy
    @ministerofjoy Před 14 dny

    Thank you. I was in dire need of these words

  • @JamieByrne1977
    @JamieByrne1977 Před 14 dny +18

    For me, anger and shame have been dancing intimately all my life.

  • @dmeloTV
    @dmeloTV Před 14 dny +1

    I love your work, congratulations for such good job 👏

  • @briangarcia8384
    @briangarcia8384 Před 14 dny +1

    Whenever I feel like I'm gonna spill, I remind myself that my emotions are never a result of outside influences. If I ever do spill, I just say something super quick just to get it out and move on. I never dwell.

  • @genesisa.espina
    @genesisa.espina Před 8 dny

    The arguments presented are robust and well-founded. Thank you

  • @Uriel-Septim.
    @Uriel-Septim. Před 14 dny +2

    "Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured"
    - Mark Twain.
    "Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools"
    - Ecclesiastes.
    "Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die"
    - Buddha.

  • @alonsomilan7074
    @alonsomilan7074 Před 14 dny

    What a valid and well put perspective on anger. I really needed this today dealing with an angry coworker. Thank you 🙏 everyone be well.

  • @KreatywnyKajetan
    @KreatywnyKajetan Před 14 dny

    A very important content for me personally. Thank you wholeheartedly.

  • @bro5846
    @bro5846 Před dnem

    Anger is important for ensuring boundaries are respected

  • @Paseosinperro
    @Paseosinperro Před 8 dny +1

    It is very different to move your energy to release it from having violent thoughts or intentions. As Bruce Lee says: Express with emotion, not with violence.

  • @Leispada
    @Leispada Před 14 dny +1

    Interesting! I will take this knowledge with me moving forward

  • @lyndachaput7540
    @lyndachaput7540 Před 14 dny

    So wise! Thank you for this point. :)

  • @joannaedwards6325
    @joannaedwards6325 Před 14 dny +1

    I shouted a lot of angry things at my annoying neighnor from inside my apartment (hoping she would hear) for a year.
    Soon after I got some painful arthritis.
    Coincidence ?? idk.

  • @scotleoqueen704
    @scotleoqueen704 Před 4 dny

    "Speak when you are angry and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret" idk who said that but 💯💯

  • @maka-shi7825
    @maka-shi7825 Před 14 dny

    Just when i needed it thank you for the wisdom

  • @katrashis
    @katrashis Před 10 dny

    I needed this so bad.. thank you for posting the vegeta. It hooked me

  • @javitotito
    @javitotito Před 9 dny

    Thank you needed this

  • @saicosis13
    @saicosis13 Před 7 dny

    Ironically, I see this video after quitting my job for this same reason. Thank you for the info 🙏 really appreciated.

  • @ts7371
    @ts7371 Před 5 dny +2

    Can’t agree. Righteous anger is a powerful emotion to stop harm or evil.

  • @roivosemraiva
    @roivosemraiva Před 14 dny

    Dealing and facing anger is to treat it with peaceful understanding why you are angry.
    Thank you..the world should watch thus video

  • @alicearcturus8610
    @alicearcturus8610 Před 14 dny

    This was interesting and I learned something very useful. I am old but when I was young I thought Freud was full of crap. I did not know, however, that venting anger could be bad. Everyone, everywhere said it was good to get it out. Being old, it takes to much of my valuable energy to be angry. I don't like to vent anymore and I do feel more peaceful. From now on I will let all anger go like a balloon. This video is very very helpful. Thank you!!!

  • @themoonkiddo
    @themoonkiddo Před 13 dny +1

    i found the idea that "there's no reason to be angry. anger betrays reason" interesting. i'd like to watch/read more content from this point of view

  • @liborrajm2916
    @liborrajm2916 Před 14 dny +1

    I have a feeling the need to vent anger is linked to desire for at least some control of the situation. It feels like an active response rather than passive acceptance. It might be that we feel it as a sign of weakness to not do anything, and so anger is deployed as a form of defense strategy (i.e. angry and strong > calm and weak). But clearly, as explained in the video, this strategy backfires.

  • @musicfuelourlife2910
    @musicfuelourlife2910 Před 14 dny +1

    I love all your videos. Keep it up👍

  • @robertmyerson8024
    @robertmyerson8024 Před 12 dny

    Very relevant thanks for the video

  • @angeladawn805
    @angeladawn805 Před 14 dny

    Bless you Einzelgānger,
    Thank you for your beautifully presented gems of wisdom.
    Your kindness travels far and wide.
    ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤😊

  • @manjuchoudhary3867
    @manjuchoudhary3867 Před 12 dny

    Needed it thanks ❤😊

  • @forestreee
    @forestreee Před 10 dny

    It's one thing to know that anger is bad, but another to actually control yourself in a tense situation.

  • @pruettstephen1413
    @pruettstephen1413 Před 14 dny

    What you are saying is 100% true. Outward venting of anger is destructive in every sense. How many children have lived through a childhood of house hold anger only to turn that learned behavior on themselves. Now that is truly tragic.

  • @davidtollefson8411
    @davidtollefson8411 Před 13 dny

    I needed this. I’m a pretty calm person, but I have definite anger issues that I need to work on.

  • @billabong272
    @billabong272 Před 14 dny

    I need this. Thank you.

  • @mbeining11
    @mbeining11 Před 14 dny

    Thank you for this

  • @zodiacfml
    @zodiacfml Před 14 dny

    agreed. anger should only be used for life threating situations or emergencies. most people abuse or overuse it with diminishing and detrimental effects. anger is a symptom of a problem that should be solved or avoided. my mother used this all the time on business and relationships, it only just drains her energy and easily forget the wrongdoings of her enemies and my father.

  • @debramurphy3629
    @debramurphy3629 Před 14 dny +9

    I am a neuropsychologist and also just read this study....I LOVE it!!!! I share this with my students. Absolutely LOVE your channel and now I see you have many followers!!!! So happy for you!!!! I started listening to you from the beginning 😁 I tell all my students about your channel. You provide such excellent topics!!!! Thank you ever so much and have a splendid day 🌻

    •  Před 14 dny +2

      Thank you for your compliments and sharing my work with your students. I'm honoured :). Have a nice day, too!

  • @leahleeds4289
    @leahleeds4289 Před 14 dny

    That was fantastic!!

  • @planetfocus911
    @planetfocus911 Před 12 dny

    "The intoxication of anger, like that of the grape, shows us to others, but hides us from ourselves" - Colton.

  • @johnroman4608
    @johnroman4608 Před 14 dny

    Forever count ur words before spitting them out - I came off some heated words .. all I could do was listen & be quiet, could not reason. And there I was ! 😮

  • @poojithrao4864
    @poojithrao4864 Před 14 dny +1

    Love that you put vegeta in the thumbnail!❤️

  • @laksh3929
    @laksh3929 Před 14 dny +1

    I really hope many people watch this video

  • @ordinaryvalley
    @ordinaryvalley Před 14 dny +1

    Whenever i feel sudden anger arising in me, instead of directing it to someone or myself, I write it out or type it out on my phone. “I am so angry right now!” “I am so angry with so and so at the moment!” “Why am i feeling so angry…maybe its because…” are some of the things i write right away and that immediately activates my frontal cortex and get me out of my primitive/narcissistic limbic system. I recommend it to everyone ❤ Peace ❤

    • @blackmonarch2380
      @blackmonarch2380 Před 14 dny

      This works absolutely so, great recommendation! Peace.🫀♾️

  • @jonathanrandall4140
    @jonathanrandall4140 Před 14 dny

    Anger, as long as it isn't turned outward, is a catalyst for change. Fuel.

  • @mekalmathew8409
    @mekalmathew8409 Před 7 dny

    I think it is more accurate to say that we should avoid "wrath" rather than anger itself. Anger is classified as one of the few basic human emotions in psychology, along with sadness, happiness, fear, surprise, and disgust. "Anger" is more accurately viewed as a feeling--rather than an action. It is what you do with that emotion that determines if it is healthy or not. So if you use your emotion of anger to inflict disorder in the world around you (considered wrath), that would be considered negative. But you can utilize your emotion of anger for positive things aswell. The video makes very valid points on the need to control anger, and this is expressed thoroughly in Buddhist philosophy. In Buddhism, when you feel anger it is considered the "first bullet" and this is unavoidable for everyone, but when you take this anger and cause inappropriate chaos, that is considered the "second bullet." It is within our grasp to control and even eliminate this "second bullet." Some examples of "good" anger include Ghandi's peaceful protest, MLK peaceful protest, and even Jesus' anger in the temple. To eliminate anger is asking to eliminate a basic human emotion, which is to reject an aspect of the humanity that lives in you. It is thus more important to learn how to control and direct it to more productive avenues.
    TLDR:
    Anger = human emotion and often necessary. Need to learn how to control and use rather than "avoid."
    Wrath = negative expression of anger; bad and should be avoided. (what the video is more specifically referring to)

  • @shettydhanu9211
    @shettydhanu9211 Před dnem

    Thank you ❤

  • @efrahaimrn
    @efrahaimrn Před 7 dny

    anger is a defense mechanism to a weakness.
    that weakness is pain.
    we all feel angry because we were hurt or offended.