SPIES - Terrible Writing Advice
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- čas přidán 11. 01. 2019
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Have a plot for a fantasy or science fiction story but worried it might be too unbelievable for those genres? Well try making it a spy story instead. Anything goes in a spy story.
Honest Thoughts up in the next couple of days.
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If your spies' most well-known line is him saying his full legal name, you're doing it right. ;)
James Bond is not a name, it's a designation, like 007.
@@leonardchurch5199 And Skyfall. We see his ancestral home and the graves of his parents.
His parents must've been mean if they named their kid Bond James Bond.
@@mrsharpie7899 BJ... B
My name is Yoshikage Kira.
If the master spy is a girl, make sure she always wears high heels and her hair down, it's not like those cause hindrances in combat or field work.
a Female Spy Protagonist can use her Sex Appeal to Distract their Enemies & Offend SJW.
Don’t forget the clothes that obviously hinder the person
Don't forget to add loads of ambigiously erotic scenes which tackles with a diverse array of fetishes, raising the stakes and something else.
It worked so well with Totally Spies.
And make her really ditzy and obsessed with shopping because that's likable somehow.
@@StellaFangX To be fair, even the male protagonist is prone to being tortured in erotic ways.
*"I can't write charismatic characters with social skills, I don't have any social skills. That's why I became a writer."*
You too?
Wow...
*IS THIS A PERSONAL ATTACK?!*
@@claudiolluberes111 Yes, But it's only because I have no social skills.
Same reason Charisma's almost always a dump stat in RPGs for me.
I'm reminded of an article that I read a few years ago where MI6 said they'd never hire James Bond in real life due to his lack of emotional intelligence.
Unless thats what they WANT you to think *taps nose knowingly*
If james bond was part of MI6 England would be fucked lmao
@Alex & Rah what soviet union all i see is a load of small nations and russa
Except they (or at least, one of their precursor agencies) *did* hire Ian Fleming, who was basically a less good-looking James Bond with a less exciting intelligence career. So, maybe it would be more accurate to say that they wouldn't hire James Bond anymore....
That is hilarious. I kind of want to read that article.
"Most espionage is illegal."
Honestly that's probably the best writing advice you'll ever give. Cuz yeah...espionage is kinda illegal, which is why the biggest rule about it is, "DON'T GET CAUGHT!" It's rather important.
Honestly, it feels like there are two types of spy fiction. The International accepted Spy who only spies on evil organisation bend on taking over the world(We swear, no James Bond doesn't use this as an excuse to spy on neutral countries, we are just here for the villains.....and i just realized that this actually a pretty good cover...) and the ones actually doing spying instead of investigations.
@@aquila4460 Hey, that's actually a great idea. Use the obvious "justifiable" spying to cover the real operation.
@@ChainsawChuck13 Similarly, the line between "diplomatic staff with every right to be here and ask questions" and "spy here to illegally acquire information" is often crossed in real life
The US govt calls it NOC or non official cover. The CIA, 🕵🏻♂️ has 2 sides; technical & ops or "operations". 🤫. The tech side gets most of the CIA funding.
*that's where the tactic and ploy when cornered by burly henchmen of pointing over their shoulder and shouting "LOOK OUT!!!!" and then running away never fails*
"Hey, the terrorists were stupid enough to share their location on Twitter."
It's ok a random 4Chan board has already found them by analyzing cloud patterns and rocks in the road and called in a Russian airstrike on their location.
There is nothing more powerful than racism and weaponized insanity
@@cromwelltheconqueror3430 it's a beautiful day when the imageboards align
Wait that actually happened?
@@Cocojonut-fp8ek I think once they used constellations and flight plans to find Shia Lebouf and take down his flag.
@@Cocojonut-fp8ek Yeah it actually did. Interestingly there was also an ex-Russian soldier who sent the Syrian rebel base’s coordinates to his former General and that’s how they wiped the fuckers out
Never mind that the best spies are never noticed and are people you least expect. Like a local school teacher, baker, barista or janitor. Or just a nameless beaucrate in a big department.
But you know. Eye candy and power fantasy.
The TV show, "The Americans" walks a fine line between the two.
It depicts two KGB officers who are incredibly skilled and competent, who lead a double life as a suburban couple for their cover.
I suppose it really depends on what they are targeting. I mean if they're targeting people that frequent high society and so on. but, yeah generally you'd be correct.
James bond and the like aren't spies though. It's literally their job to go and (potentially) kill lots of people and do stuff and then leave.
@@Graknorke Bond is also awful at doing a cleaner's job. His job would be to go to a problem area and make that problem go away quietly.
@@CasualNotice Not to mention how he's called a spy literally in the title of at least one film.
Spies in fiction logic: shoot everything in sight with high tech gear and bang everything in your path
*_SNEAK 100_*
@@joshuaowens4095 Damn I was gonna reply the same thing but you beat me to it
nah he just uses a box nuff said
*STANDS IN A PILE OF CORPSES*
Nobody will notice if there's nobody to notice.
oh, the skyrim version of sneak, where crouching means invisibility.
Charisma 10
Speech 100
Barter 100
“I don’t have any social skills! That’s why I became a writer!” ...I feel personally attacked😂
I don't. LOL
Interesting, I also lack social skills I'm thinking about becoming a writer myself
(kinda. I would draw comics instead of writing books. They both tell stories)
Then get some social skills then. Then maybe you won't find ways to imply you're a "writer" in a youtube comment.
Same :D!
I remember someone once said "I feel so called out and yet so understood."
The best type of spy is the type of spy to be so obviously a spy that people think he isn't a spy.
First
It's been an hour and your comment isn't at the top? What's going on here?
I had that in a Science Fiction pulp series a while ago. Guy with a playboy lifestyle tells everyone he is a spy. Buys gadgets that people believe is just part stick of being rich. A few people finally had to believe him, because there was no way a civillian could have had the information he knew. He just wasn't part of the spy organization he had bragged about being a member off.
And those that found it out? I doubt anyone believed them. And even if they believed, what can they do about it? Try to do anything against a VIP that has the secret protection of a spy organization. And for anyone else? He is rich, so why shouldn't he have elite bodyguards?
Justin Y.
That...is actually very clever
'What if Justin Y.'s a spy?'
'What if I'm a spy? Or you? Could go on all night..."
So which type of espionage should we choose to write?
A) The Solid Snake Way
B) The James Bond Way
C) The Austin Powers way
D) The TF2 Spy Way
virus Juvera or what about E) The Jason Bourne way?
Which by the way, Jason Bourne is a really good spy series. Just be warned that the movies use shaky cam and multiple shots and have been infamous for causing motion sickness in people. Consider yourself warned, but it’s still really good.
I prefer the old James Bond way, but a little spiced up in the action department. For that reason my favorite James Bond movie is and remains 'You only live twice'. Between 'Little Nellie', Ninjas and Bond being outclassed in martial Arts for once it's great. And (Spoiler Warning) Bond even dies in the first few minutes in a way most fitting for him.
@@grayscribe1342 "He would have wanted it this way".
E) the TF2 spy
Vantor Vantor that’s the D option
"So what are you?"
"A door-to-door salesman."
"Really?"
"No, I'm a government spy on the rounds to discover information about some super-secret conspiracy theory that is being tackled by some super-secret government organisation."
"..."
"Yes, I'm a door-to-door salesman"
And it turns out later that he wasn't a door-to-door salesman but was still telling the truth.
"I said no lies!"
"...I think he's telling the truth."
"If he were telling the truth, he wouldn't have told us!"
SARCASM 100
And worst of all, he could be any one of us
SPAHS SAPPIN MAH SENTREY
He could even be YOU
@@LucaGlitchy He could be ME!
@@sean80429 He could even be-
What? It was obvious; He's the RED Spy!
I made up a story off the top of my head once when I was with my friends. My favorite character was this male gas station cashier who was dressed as Wonder Woman and who was also a Russian spy. Nobody would ever suspect a male gas station cashier dressed as Wonder Woman to be a Russian spy. But do we get spy novel protagonists who are male gas station cashiers dressed as Wonder Woman and also Russian spies? No, we get James Bond over and over again.
Somebody write this!
This would be an example of refuge in audacity no one would suspect that a cross-dresser and a wonder woman cosplayer would be a spy thus he would be hiding in plain sight.
So exposed he is hidden in plain sight
Emily Caballero, you genius, you!!!!
Plus your protagonist is a fan of Wonder Woman, which already makes him incredibly likable to me.
This channel is trope dissections and genuinely good writing advice underneath a mountain of shade and I'm living for it
I know, outside of the entertainment factor, it's also really helpful for those looking to improve their writing.
I know, until TierZoo happened (And who uploads more frequently) this was my new favourite youtube channel. It's so amazing, entertaining, and helpful.
"good writing advice"
if you're 12 maybe
@@neo-filthyfrank1347 I mean, I'm 21 and this channel has done a lot to help me improve my work. J.P. makes a point of highlighting common mistakes, pitfalls, and lacking areas in writing.
Writing isn't easy. Not the act of it, but actually growing skill and an understanding of fundamentals. Even if it seems like it should be obvious, if you don't have any pre-existing experience and skill you're going to write like a child, regardless of age. That goes for literally everything, too. Someone who's never played video games before is going to play like a child, even if they're 30. Someone who's never drawn before will draw like a child. Someone who's never done makeup before is going to do makeup like a child. Developing skill past a very basic point isn't easy for most, and it's why even what should be obvious stuff like this is extremely helpful to people.
@@MirunaNero This channel offers nothing but the most vapid, one beat, and functionally useless writing advice out there. It is so bad. Nobody except a complete and utter beginner will get ANYTHING useful whatsoever from this channel.
Like I said, it's literally just one-step observations that usually take the form of "haha common cliché everyone already talks about is bad". This is one the same level as watching cinemasins or the nostalgia critic.
He offers absolutely nothing of substance to anyone who already understands the most basic of fundamentals, and I can't help but think that it's because either 1) He's not smart enough to talk about anything but stuff a million people have said already or 2) He's afraid to take any kind of meaningful stance on creative works.
Or maybe he's just lazy, these videos are literally the laziest thing ever, at least the commentary in them is, literally just repeating one-bit lines from Doug Walker or whoever about "one dimensional characters" or "wow that character death came out of nowhere, makes audience mad so like don't do that".
Literally all he's been doing for however long he's been at this is just stating the painfully obvious over and over again, it's just a gimmick he's milking dry at this point (as if trying to weave sponsorships into a story that takes 40% of the video isn't making them unwatchable enough).
Why not actually use his brain and discuss integration of themes, or how to use foreshadowing, or what actually makes a character good beyond "if you add a one beat line about them caring about people, it'll make them really likeable!"
Also this brings up a slightly different point but you've sent me on a ramble. A lot of people watching this are not at all talented or imaginative or original, and they certainly aren't going to get better watching this. Their ideas for stories seem to be incredibly gimmicky and lame. Have you ever been on the Worldbuilding Stack Exchange? It strikes me very much as a similar sort of crowd, ie "help me justify futuristic pirates with laser weapons" or "help with this story involving warriors from all over time battling it out!".
It's all incredibly gimmicky, shallow stuff. I'm not saying all fiction needs to be super complex (though of course actual integration of complex thoughts and ideas is generally a better thing), but this is all seems like "durr I should write a novel let me cobble together an idea I'm just going to randomly think up in five seconds".
It seems like when you ask someone to name their favorite (insert thing here) when said person is obviously not very interested in that thing. You notice that what they say seems a little weird and is probably just the result of an immediate thought, like "hmm well uh, I'm familiar with this and I guess this is sort of cool". Like there is no passion, no inspired birth of ideas, no interest in fundamental concepts from which a story is derived.
"I don't have any social skills! That's why I became a writer."
You're pretty good at this, ain'tcha?
Pope Guilty XIII thats true for me tho...
He is a critic, just he talk about general issues of genres instead specific works.
@@TheRezro
I know.
*who else wants that on a shirt?...i'd buy it without a moments hesitation*
All I want is some freaking sharks with freaking lasers on their heads!
That's not a spy but a super-villain. 😀
Still better than dragons shooting lasers out of their FREAKING EYES!!
Throw me a frickin' bone here!
Sharks are endangered. You need to start with sea bass. And they're ill-tempered, too.
riiiiiiight
My manly spy protagonist is a manly mans man who is only into manly things like MANLY football, MANLY wrestling, MANLY fighting, and MAN ON MAN ROMANCE
"Because what's more manlier than two men?"
@@w4t894thwl3r 3 men and gay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’d read that.
Man on man = double manliness
I think you mean man on man roMANce😏
Jokes on you! I don't have good writing skills OR good social skills. I bet you feel stupid now
Same
me_irl
@r mwf; we don't need "skills", we've a limitless supply of.... of something! At least I've got a limitless supply of something, and when I find out what I've got they'll be sorry.
ok but big ass mood
@Hamlet It is okay, Hamlet. There, there. Go talk to your skull.
Just making a suggestion, but how about making a terrible writing advice on superpowers. Be sure to include reality warping cause that power can kill the plot really quickly.
And magic as sidenote. Most magic is treated as superpower anyways.
Yes. I’m torn between Mary Sue having fire, ice, electric, distortion of matter, time travel, teleportation, or love triangle powers. You know what, I’ll just use all of them.
Just make sure she only discovers these powers when she needs them. And afterwards never uses them again
And dont dare to mention them ever again, and give never an explaination why. Especially with reality warping powers.
If the power ever cause a problem or make the main character overpowered just write them off or say they don't work because reason
Some evening Terrible Writing Advice, neat.
Huh, neat.
The perfect spy is:
*from france
*skilled in the art of stabbing backs (literally)
*never seen without either a cigarette or a baguette in his mouth
*possibly any one of us. He could be you, he could be me!
*this is a bucket.
Oh no
DEAR GOD....
There’s More..
*nO*
*right behind you
that would be your mother
Well, actually, he's actually Russian. Double agent, you see.
Actually, a thickly-accented baguette-obsessed French tourist guy could be a pretty good disguise for a stereotypical Russian spy. Hmm.
You know the bar scene in Inglorious Basterds? I'd like to see more spy movies with scenes like that. Where the most engaging part is characters trying to use their wits and charisma to outplay and outsmart each other.
One of the best scenes I've ever watched, as someone who finds most films predictable and boring, it genuinely kept my attention the full way through.
You mean the battle of the wits that concludes by Til Schweiger shooting somebody in the crotch before starting a massive shootout? Great scene.
@@paulenan9636 omg ikr
@@paulenan9636 it earns that shootout
@@tomosprey8 it does, yes. So much tension, so much build up, it is kinda the perfect, yet bloody ending of the scene
That moment when you care about an animal that is accidentally killed in the crossfire more than the main characters death later in the story.
*James bond intensifies*
@@veritas69420 *summer time loving plays in the background*
Also *metal gear intensefies*
*TF2 also intensifies*
Don't you mean Jerome bond
*plays generic spy music
Did anyone else notice that the bottle at 0:59 said "Writer's Tears?"
Edit: Just to be clear, I know that most everyone saw this. I was just pointing out how JP puts all these little details into his videos that I think makes them all the more interesting and funny. I wasn't mentioning for likes or attention, I just wanted to admire all the work JP does to make his videos good.
SO THAT'S WHERE THEY WENT!!!
Yes
It literally is an Irish Whiskey
@@nohbuddy1 Some damned fine Irish Whiskey
AmericanNohbuddy ™ As a copy editor, I only drink Writers’ Tears... and writers’ tears ;)
Since I'm early I would like to say TWA inspired me to start writing a story I am halfway through. My MC is named Maria Sew, a character loved by all who has the special ability to conquer any obstacle near instantly and keep every spec of dust off her face. My antagonist wants to enslave the world and destroy it in a big mask. Thank you, J.P.
OKAY but is there a love triangle between her long time friend who she's ways had a crush on and the alien guy from space who somehow looks exactly like a normal 18 year old male who shows up to beat up a bunch of bad guys?
I think you misspelled her name. I think it's actually "Mary Sue".
"If unsure about the title just put golden or gold somewhere"
*FIGHTING GOLD*
GOLDEN WIND
GOLDEN EXPERIENCE
JOOOOOJOOOOO GOLDEN WIND
Golden eye- james bond
Or" The Something Something," like "The Ipcress File," "The Holcroft Covenant," "The Bourne Identity," etc.
This video reminded me of a bit of narration from a novel series I adore.
"The scariest part of a spy had nothing to do with the great firepower or nimble mobility displayed by Hollywood action stars. Their true value lay in their ability to disturb information. Was the information before your eyes true or not? Who was an enemy and who was an ally? Was it safe to think you had won or not?
"
I honestly think it pretty much speaks to the spy's greatest asset, especially given how important intelligence is.
I mean without spies the Germans probably would have developed atomic weapons before their defeat, and now that I think about it much of the Cold War would still happen. Huh.
My favorite spy story is still "The Cardinal of the Kremlin", mainly because it showcases the differences between "Hollywood Spies" and a more realistic version of spying.
To almost oversimplify: you have a section involving real spies who consist of some really old guy who is well respected and has been around a long enough time enough to be in a highly trusted position, and every so subtly he sneaks an occasional extra copy of a document he makes into the hands of somebody else before going on with the rest of his non-spy-filled day. The information goes from hand to hand until it reaches the CIA. He had been successfully doing this for thirty years with only a minor slip causing the whole thing to come to an end.
Another part of the story involves a "spy" team trying to kidnap a man and has action beats. The plan goes very very badly right out of the gate and backfires horribly.
Which style of espionage do you believe is more effective? :)
The one that took years to slip I would say.
That book (or any Clancy) wasn’t realistic at all. They let a spy and saboteur caught in the act go, for the sake of ‘honor.’ I think I’d rather believe in Austin Powers.
Spies come in many forms, including those who are middle-aged men wearing tropical-print shirts and straw hats, holding giant hedge clippers and staring into your window from your backyard to see what you're watching on Netflix and binge with you -- all in the dead of Canadian winter.
Did you miss the entire Genre of female James Bond Knockoffs? Charlies Angels? The Recent Atomic Blond? They're absolutely a significant subgenre.
Should we also add Agent Aika? I mean, the villain's plot was a rip-off of Moonraker, so I think it counts for something.
Salt, Silent night deadly night, several anime.
"I don't have social skills. That's why I became a writer!"
-J.P. Beaubien, 2019
Why is this me? 😂
I'm a simple man. I see a TWA video, I click. Then I like. Then I watch. In that order.
Same.
Exactly! How can you watch something if you don't like it?
I like, then watch, then click
Did you remember to... SUBSCRIBE!?!?
Were you spying on me?!
*LE AUDIBLE GASP*
If you know anything about spies, then you know that real spies are both a lot cooler and a lot better at stealth than movie ones. Their jobs are also a lot less exciting.
Not if you consider their paperwork and reports
@@Max_Le_Groom To be fair their paperwork and reports are still cooler than everyone else's.
@@patrickbuckley7259
True 😂
What? Real spy work is boring and monotonous.
Benjamin Fricke What about the Mission Impossible movies though ?
3:30: A point made with all the subtlety and care it needs.
yeep
I'm surprised you didn't make a mention of Metal Gear, if only because it is kind of an alternative Type 3 of spy fiction. Namely, WE'RE GOIN OFF THE RAILS OF THE CRAZY TRAAAAAAAIIIIIIIINNNNNNN!
...NANOMACHINES SON!
But do they ever refer to the Snakes as spies? They're special forces soldiers and masters of infiltration, but I don't recall them ever being called spies.
@@np8139 it's pretty much spy stuff though,the name of the game is literally Tactical Espionage Action
Also MGS3 has a ridiculous amount of espionage and sabotage and stuff
Oh there was a cardboard box hiding gag in the video
It's funny how MGS games always get praised for their "riveting story" despite the fact that those always sound like sci-fi fanfiction written by a 12-year old. I'm not debating the quality of the games themselves, but...ugh.
I thought Solid Snake, and his "dad" Big Boss, was the Dark-n-Gritty type of spy, who smokes a lot instead of drinking, and wind up being tortured instead of the other way around. Oh yeah, and you can count Raiden in there too, taking into account his past as a child soldier in Liberia.
This is a spy comment
This means
1; You must ignore it
2: You must like it
3: You also must ignore the paradox caused by the first two rules
4: If you reply you MUST do it in a British accent
5: You must violate the Geneva Conventions AT Least 007 times
pip pop cherio i got the 4th one down
u wot m8
Bloody brilliant.
hOn honhonHoN, oUi OUi oUi
Well the rhowandans don't like me anymore, m8, but here's your likes.
"I don't have any charisma, that's why I became a writer!"
Too real, dude, too real.
I... feel like the ad sketches are getting a little too elaborate, this one was like a quarter of the video.
I like the little side-drama they're doing, and it's at the end so it's easy to skip for people who don't like it. It's better than stopping in the middle to ramble about the cool product they tried out.
Wouldn't it be fun to have a spy story from the perspective of a diplomat who has to do damage control for the massive damage that spies in these movies do?
Broke: Love Black Hole played straight.
Woke: Bring back everyone from the love black hole for the final story. Espionage avengers, assemble!
Oh jesus, imagine if there was a bond movie where literally all the bond girls from every previous movie come back. I think that would be the biggest love-icosahedron of all time.
@@ThingsStuffington if you charted it out it would look like a firework
@@ThingsStuffington - With the kids.
More like espionage orgy
Maybe that is the backstory of Jame's Angels sorry I meant Charlie's
Not a spy drama, but I do remember an early episode episode of "Criminal Minds" where an Islamic terrorist is arrested and interrogated. He has information about a future attack, but refuses to give it up. The main character doesn't beat the info out of him but instead has polite conversations with him and even uses his own prayer schedule against him, since there are no windows in the terrorist's cell and he has to rely on the word of the main character to know when prayer time is. The main character manages to trick the terrorist into believing that it's 5 hours ahead of the actual time and the future attack happened. After allowing the terrorist to gloat about how he "won," the main character and the team are able to get to the location just as the other terrorists were starting to set them up and catch them all. It was one of the most fascinating episodes I ever saw, and worked way better than "beat the crap out of the interviewee until he confesses" trope that I see in so many interrogation scenes.
I am a Ukrainian spy who got caught in almost 4 am watchng your video
Leaving a like bc what do i have to lose
@Daniel Scott i hope this is a joke ;_;
@Daniel Scott Russia is Ukraine
@Daniel Scott no, the WORLD is russia
Наші люди усюди, кєк
@Daniel Scott True, but Moscow claim ownership of, well.. technically the world, but slaves especially. So no wounder no one want have anything to do with them with exception of fat idiots in Western countries who think that they only pretend or are jealous of Putin power (and both apply to Trump).
THAT AUTHOR IS A SPY!
*ah i see you're a man of culture as well*
You'll need a dispenser here!
I look into your X-RAY and I'm afraid, you suck!
"The demoman is a spy!"
-Spy who found out that the demoman is a spy.
THAT Iscopeeee IS A SPY
JP, my copy of Aeon Legion arrived in the mail today so perfect timing on a new upload!
I am glad folks are buying his book. Considering how much effort he likely put into the work, it is good to have it read by people who will appreciate it.
I hope you enjoy the story
I think you're gonna like it. I made a video review of it, but if it piques your curiosity, you might want to wait 'til you're done reading it to watch the review. It gets a little bit spoilery.
Spartan Delta 27 I’m four chapters in as I type this and so far I’m getting a Kingsman + Men In Black and Time Squad vibe so I’m loving it so far
Will Multiverses be next? Like I commented earlier?
If not I would suggest a writing advice on Dinosaurs! Dinosaurs are some of the most interesting creatures ever to exist with all sorts of variety.......which is why we should use only the same 8 species (T-Rex, velociraptor, brachiosaurus, pteranodon, stegosaurus, triceratops, allosaurus, and Parasaurolophus) and make them as uninteresting and one note as possible. Let’s start with the t-Rex! The T-rex (or the slightly smaller allosaurus) should just be a clone of sharp tooth (land before time) or the one from Jurassic Park with it being a mindless savage killer chasing our heroes through all sorts of biomes deserts, mountains, jungles, fields and forests! Never ask why the same animal keeps chasing the prey of course! As for Velociraptors have them be the same as t-Rex except super smart! Ignore the fact that real velociraptors were the size of a small pit bull (with better music of course) and had the intellect of a common seagull. Whatever you do don’t ever use any of species of dinosaur or ancient reptiles such as: Giganotosaurus, Carcharodontosaurus, Spinosaurus, carnotaurus, Quetzalcoatlus, yutyrannus, deinonychus, acrocanthosaurus, suchomimus, gojirasaurus, baryonyx, or dilophosaurus).
As for the other dinosaurs.....just have them be cannon fodder for the theropods or tiny humans. Unless it’s a kids story and have the herbivores be the heroes and be no different than normal humans.
Most importantly of all never give any dinosaurs feathers ever!
Also are the conspiracy guys working for the Cthulhu cult?
We can solve this problem by destroying the entire planet
They weren't before, but they are now! And boy, is it inconvenient...
That would be a good one.
Can’t believe people responded to the older version of my comment
Yeah Pterosaurs are totally dinosaurs its not like they split off on their own in the early Triassic. Oh and while we are at it we can't forget to make them move like birds after all Its not like they left fossilized footprints showing a quadrupedal gait or anything oh wait...
Dragrath1 I forgot to mention that whoops
Hey, J.P., can you do a video on writing children's stories please?
you cant realy f#&% that up just go for it
Vantor Vantor
I mean, there are all those children’s stories, shows, and movies which seem to severely underestimate children’s intelligence. I’m not saying we need to make them the most amazing thing ever, but some things could do better than ‘this is thing! Look at thing!’
@@fredjohnston1701 Exactly, way too many think garish colors and everybody shouting three word sentences is all that takes for children.
*full of delightfully anthropomorphic woodland creatures, environmentally oriented gluten free whimsy and bushy tailed shenanigans*
What do you mean by Children’s? Stuff for grade schoolers and stuff for teenagers is a lot different.
I never really was on your side...
The truth is, it was rigged from the start.
We all knew you were a spy!
"Back poppin' snake!"
@@SlendHQ backstab that, you fraud!
I was a spy all along
Totally Spies is the best Spy series ever made. Change my mind.
Chuck is the best spy series.
No whoop is just the best agency
Johnny English
Spy kids
secret squirrel
Oh yes, every spy needs to drive around in a M1A2 Abrams
In case you really need your stealthy infiltration-mission to be successful.
@@paulenan9636 and you never know when the bad guys might pull out a tank out date maybe but still a tank orit might be advance some how more than NATO's tanks
The US army and Central Intelligence Agency actually forbid torture from being used to obtain information. Not only is it considered inhumane but often the information will be whatever the torturer just wants to hear as the victim will want to say whatever needs to be said to stop being tortured
They just don't define the cruel and inhumane methods that they do use to extract information as "torture", but they still do it.
and then guantanamo bay happened
Late to the party here, physical torture, maybe, but they're known to employ psychological torture. Their method is actually quite mundane, something as simple as a heavy metal music.
@@mickeyg7219- It still doesn't get accurate information.
@@sernoddicusthegallant6986 that's two different situations. The army needs the truth, the prison guards need a "confession", honest or otherwise.
"... the only red Ferrari in Pyongyang." Brilliant. (Also, hooray for pointing out the torture thing and TNG shout-outs!)
Do an episode on Crossovers already!
He needs to establish enough running gag plotline characters to crossover with each other first. I'd say he's about there.
Needs a love triangle!
Add Hello Future me for a love triangle
*yes! this should be one of many top priority episodes...another being one on Elaborate Over the Top Musicals™ or Rock Operas™ that Transcend™ all Human™ Understanding™and™ brings™ Peace™and™ Harmony™ to all Peoples ™of All™ Lands™*
You know, a good series that nails down espionage. Which I highly recommend with a caviat to it is Deutchland 83. Set during the cold war an East German soldier is picked by the KGB to do some espionage on the west. Theres....like maybe 3 action scenes in the whole series? The entire series really is him you know, spying on the west. Finding a high position in the military. Getting close to individuals with political standing.
It's very good and character driven. Now for the caviat....well, it's entirely in German... yeah, so subtitles. But yeah the whole series is in German. I sweat though its aweosme.
8:37 ''my book doesn't have any spies... that you know of!''' that's just goes to show how good of a spies they actually are !
Shout out to the 39 Clues books for helping me realize reading is TV without commercials
The Hunter x Hunter 2011 Dickriding Association ah memories
"What do you get from a glut of TV?
A pain in the neck and an IQ of three
Why don't you try simply reading a book?
Or can you just not bear to look?
You'll get no... (you'll get no...) you'll get no commercials! "
@@Booksds laughs in roaku an tv the streams every thang so no commercials
@@8vantor8 *laughs in fluent English*
*laughs in DVD*
You know what would make a great Terrible Writing Advice video?
*A tournament arc.*
5:43
"Hey! The terrorists were stupid enough to share their location on Twitter."
[Falcon and winter soldier left the chat]
Video didn’t self destruct in 5 seconds. 0/10
Spies, the perfect reason for not so perfect acronyms
You mean like SPECTRE (SPecial Executive for Counterintelligence, Terrorism, Revenge, and Extortion)?
OWCA anyone?
@@squarecross7383 I was LITERALLY about to comment that
I never want to skip your sponsored segments, they're always so interesting.
The testosterone levels just went through the roof.
Sandskrit you’ve obviously never seen JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure because that was when testosterone levels exploded.
@Alex & Rah That's like 99% of fiction.
@Alex & Rah Hmm, haven't seen those yet. As for the whole nice guy thing - I think that's at least partially in response to feminist criticism of "toxicly masculine" heroes. But the writers still need drama and also for the MC to know what his love interest is doing (for plot contrivance reasons), so they have the "nice guys" committing morally inept acts. What can you expect - Hollywood writers have no creativity to work around a situation to make it fit within the narrative. I've also noticed that writers have been trying to write their straw man of an alpha male as being an anti-hero instead. Which works sometimes, but then in other times they still end up getting the girl at the end, which is actually worse. Lol
jojo?
@Alex & Rah oh god. The Big Bang Theory is so bad in that. I used to watch it as a kid, and their constant assertions that Women Can't Be Nerds was sooo lame to me even then. I was like "but then what about me".
Speaking of “word famous spies/secret agents”, pretty sure the danger mouse cartoon brought this up, as the main character is a world *famous* spy, part of a *secret* organisation, where there is an episode where the USA/female/hardcore equivalent to him brings up the fact that everyone knows who he and the organisation he works for is.
I think. I never really watched it that much
Too quote a Frenchman in a hockey mask with a revolver
“Well this was a disappointment.”
But seriously why doesn’t the villain just say “hey boys it’s a spy” then shoot then remove the sapper from your sentry
Not enough cruelty, here:
Here's what I have that you don't: a functioning liver, depth perception and a pulse!
that enginere is a spy
Insert name here
Hockey mask?
New Porker Ski mask sorry
"Ohhh Soldier.. who will they find to replace you now?... ANYONE! AHAHAHAHA"
_BONK!_
"Eheeey! You shape-shifted into a dead guy!"
_dead ringer!_
*_STAB!_*
"Wellp! Off to visit your mother! AHAHAHAHAHAH!"
I saw the "How many lights are there?" thing at 3:20, and immediately knew it was Chain of Command (there are only 4, after all) and I was still happy to see the "BTW Chain of Command was a really good pair of TNG episodes" Anyways, great video, and I can't wait to see more Terrible Writing Advice
I'd read a story where the action spy and gritty spy team up. Their designs are simple, yet contrast well
Can you do the mystery genre next?
I misread this as "Mystery Genie," which wouldn't make much sense as a TWA episode but sounds like a decent theme for a writing contest.
There is an intrigue plots episode
@@grizzlyowlbear3538 I think they meant more like a whodunnit type mystery, like Agatha Christie kind of stuff.
@@lauries3961 Close enough lul
*scooby doo gerne*
"I can't write charismatic characters with social skills! I don't have social skills. That's why I became a writer."
I came here to have a good time and I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now
"I don't have any social skills. That's why i became a writer!"
Oof. that gut punch.
Ok, as a German, the whole "out of touch politicals handling sensitive informations" thing hit way to close to home in the light of recent events.
Apart from that, (while it was already implied) don't forget the important fact, that for the power-fantasy-spy consent is more or less optionally.
THE HEAVY IS SPY!
id love to have a spy movie about a sweet little old lady getting back into the spy business to save her grandson, and have her actually be competent at her job.
If you love your subscribers, you'll give us a collaboration with overly sarcastic productions and hello future me.
Preferably both at once, in a video about crossovers. It'd be apt.
*and THAT'S your triangle of perfection right there*
I love that you evolve the sponsor ad. It's part of the advice and that's what makes it great.
I know you put it under a 'low hanging parody fruit' trope, but I really like that one Geico commercial where the villain goes through a detailed business presentation on powerpoint explaining world domination to the captured spy.
Stop it goddamnit. I don't need more wips. I already have so many.
Ugh, fine. Time to go start a spy thriller.
What about a Symbolism Episode?
he talked about this briefly in the Cyberpunk video
*metaphor...Shaka when the walls fell...Darmoc at Tenagra...Shelnari her Cleavage Unfettered*
Love your videos man, I always look forward to a new one of these.
All it takes to be a spy is to draw the face of one of your enemies on a piece of paper and wear it on your face. Works every time!
I just happen to be watching all your videos again when this came out what timing
Is Munich a spy movie, because if so that's my favorite. It does have the theme of the protagonist worrying about the morality of his actions but he was reluctant to even do the job in the first place. It tackles the eventual paranoia and PTSD that comes from the awareness of being in the covert world. Just knowing there are people out there doing exactly what you have been doing, but on the other side. Also the capabilities and lengths your own country is willing to go to.
“I don’t have any social skills, that’s why I became a writer.”
This quote hit me on a personal level
Your sponsorships are so well done and integrated, they are the only ones on yt I don't immediately click away from :)
Terrible writing advice: "Kept you waiting, huh?"
1:14
YoU cAn’T hAvE a WoMaN iN mEn In BlAcK bEcAuSe It’S cAlLeD “mEn” In BlAcK
Actual comments I saw on the new MIB movie
Oof
Vandal 13 Is this a reference to the Ben shapiro debate?
Also I was expecting the SJW'S to raid this comment section.... it shows how the Internet has become :(
This might seem out of the blue, but Lachlan, I like your profile pic! Leon is the best!
Lachlan Lord of All Things Crispy Because, you know, it’s not like the first movie literally ended with a Woman in Black.
The most wonderful moments are the ones when i get a notification that you uploaded a new video!
Ty i love your content to bits and i have watched all your videos more than once, at least
You are in my top 5 for writing advice videos, I don’t write much but your dialogue when I’m on the go is exceptional! Subscribed!
“I don’t have any social skills, that’s why I became a writer!”
That’s unironically true for me.
If over 65% is plagiarism from James Bond, you're doing it right.
Never stop what you do. Your sarcasm is my lifeblood!
first sponsor ad I think I have ever enjoyed watching. Bravo sir. Bravo.
6:00 That quote sounds like it's from a really shitty BDSM story. (thinking bulb) Do a video on that please!
Nope, he's not kidding, that's actually from On Her Majesty's Secret Service (it never really comes back though.)
@@ninjabluefyre3815 I know. I've seen it (it's actually one of my favorite films). The quote just sounds like it came out of a crappy dominance fantasy story (somehow way more interesting than the typical spy film).
Everytime I read that, it's like Draco is rubbing Bonds cock for him. "A man like you!", talk about brown noser.
@@talaset6208 All that was missing was for Draco to ask if he could watch.
Yeah or does.
Hey J.P, the Revenge Trope should be a good subject to talk about.
I don't think that's wise; a Revenge Trope once killed his family, friends, entire hometown, and also his cat.
Burn Notice is still my favorite Spy thing by far. It avoids a great deal of the writing pitfalls that normally are a problem in the genre while still reveling in the campy fun.
Not to say it doesn't have its own writing problems, as it seems like Michael Weston performs more favors than any other man alive in order to keep the lights on and the bills paid, but overall it really does the genre a service.
Congrats on being the only content creator I've seen to make the sponsor plugs entertaining,
Do terrible writing advice on making an episode of terrible writing advice, it would be perfect
That would be more apropriate for April Fools.
This is like the super bowl, come for the hilarious writing videos, stay for the commercials.
Don't stop doing this it's amazing
I love your humor and videos!