let’s not waste another year inside your head - how to ACTUALLY change your life in 2024 (101 guide)
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- čas přidán 12. 06. 2024
- the notion template: jeweled-troodon-650.notion.si... (You need to duplicate the template and then you should be able to edit it)
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Hey girlies, I am in fact not dead! Just doing what was very necessary aka rebranding myself. I've been dreaming of heading into more of a 'comedy-filmmaking-life-advice-docu-series'-video style for so long, and took me moving as my chance to finally give it a shot. So if you think you'd enjoy (me attempting to do) a mixture of fleabag, cunk on earth and coming-of-age-indie movies, whilst also slipping my own flavour into it, then welcome!
Life has been a bit confusing lately, but since that means I'm getting more content out of it I guess that's good? Anyways, I've been cooking over this for over a month bc a girl had to teach herself how to animate, how to properly script, how to edit in this style, ... but here we are! I know that this isn't very similar to the fashion content I was doing before, but even though this whole process was so much work, it was so inspiring and gave me so many new ideas for the coming future (bc I got a LOT to say when it comes to productively learning from life's trials and tribulations - and by productively learning I don't mean obsessing over yet another fictional man). I hope you guys still enjoy me being me - even if it's in a bit of a different font - and stick around to see what I'll make next. If not I obviously understand, and I salute you for enduring me all this time (seriously I can get annoying, you did well).
I love you guys so so so so so much, and I know it's parasocial and doesn't feel real, but I genuinely mean it when I say it. To new beginnings for both you and me, can't wait to see what we'll make of it! (I'm not crying as I'm typing this, YOU are!)
PS: I'm about to go to the Hozier concert as I'm typing this so I guess these are my last words before meeting the love of my life!!
0:00-1:26 I need to make a change.
1:27-3:15 should you script your life?
3:16-5:56 how to design your own character
5:57-7:47 why setting a destination is so crucial
7:48-11:52 how we'll ACTUALLY change
11:53-14:07 you should be the one writing your story
Freepik link a href="www.freepik.com/free-photo/co..."
Freepik old vintage paper link: a href="www.freepik.com/free-photo/vi..."Image by kjpargeter on Freepik
The pictures used in this were either downloaded from ‘freepik’ and correctly attributed above, or downloaded from creativefabrica.com, for which I pay a monthly fee in order to be able to use their pictures commercially.
how to use the butterfly effect
why you should script your life
why scripting works
how to write your life's script
how to stop daydreaming
how to make your dreams come true fast
how to be yourself
how to know who you are
how to be authentically you
how to be myself
limerence
obsessing over fictional characters
how to stop obsessing over fictional men
how to stop coping with daydreaming
daydreaming coping mechanism
how to stop escaping reality
impact theory
how I manifest - Jak na to + styl
hi there! I've been reading all of your comments and am just AMAZED by the positive response! Welcome to everyone that is new here and thank you to anyone that was here before and decided to stay! ❤☺
Besides that, some people have had some questions regarding the Notion template, SO:
1. This is the link (the same one is in the description box): jeweled-troodon-650.notion.si...
2. When you click on the link (I tried it on multiple different devices, and it worked each time, so if it doesn't work for you I'd encourage you to try again) a new tab should open up and on there, in the upper-right corner, is a button that says 'Duplicate'.
3. If you click on that, Notion should automatically open your account and copy the template in there.
4. Now you can edit it however you want :)
(5. This is not really an additional instruction I just wanted to apologise for forgetting to swap out the pronoun 'she' with 'them' at some points. I turned the template I used myself into a general one by deleting all the things I had already filled out and swapping out the pronouns, but I missed a few - obviously correct that and customise it so that it suits your needs)
Let me know whether it works for you 🌞
Once again: I love y'all and thank you for all of the amazing support!!
I loved this video, you're so funny with the BG3 thing. I TOTALLY relate to the whole wanting friends that maybe have issues but that come together to fix those issues and work to better themselves. I always wanted that SO BAD (and the reason why i get obsessed with games like Dragon Age and BG haha), thank you for this lovely video and this message. You are very funny and sweet :)
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
This video is amazing work ^^
Also...
You are really beautiful. :)
New sub thanks for this video, you are so excellent at videography and editing, this is beautiful. I think we would love a Making Of This video explaining like where cams go and editing program opinions would be so cool. Also the content itself is lovely. Thank you, thank you for living this life
hey!! the link isnt working for me, not sure if its just me or?
Always remember: you cannot hate yourself into someone you‘ll love
I fucking love this, wrote it down in my journal. Thank you :)
So true! Did that, did not work, acceptance is better :)
damn that speaks to me in a deep level
@@veryironicveryhistrionic I don’t disagree, but what part about this mindset is dangerous?
@@twicebang4556 it's actually depends, if there's nothing wrong about yourself you dont harm yourself or others, then acceptance is key. if not then you have to change yourself to be better not harming yourself or the others.
im sick of the fact that everyone’s life is moving forward and i’m just always stuck in the same place due to my fears and anxieties
I believe you can take a step forward ✋🏾☺️
oh shit. that hit was too close to home
you can do this! stepping out of your comfort zone even a little makes it easier every time. maybe try to celebrate little wins, cause all progress is progress and soon you'll start to realise that making steps to get to where you want to be comes more naturally. you create your story, i have definitely been there but honestly sometimes you just need to do things that you know will grow you (but are scary), because often, they turn out to be not as hard or fear-inducing as they seemed. sending love :)
@@t6hrusthank you♥️♥️i'll try to remember this thought and apply it everyday
@@secretthirdthing22 you are so welcome! you’ve got this 💗
I realized the problem with my daydreaming just last year- daydreaming isn't necessarily bad but when I actually thought about it, the person I am in my daydreams is perfect- she's everything I want to be and instead of working towards becoming that person, I daydream that I'm already her.. this has affected my life and I've wasted soo many years. I've realized that I'm nothing like that person I'm just a pathetic lazy girl who can't achieve anything I'm so disconnected with reality
your way too harsh on yourself, concentrate on your skills and practice them
You're going to be just fine. Trust me.
The fact that you're already aware of your situation is already a step closer to your goal. Take this as someone who thought the same thing about herself 1 year ago:)
Back in 2022 I was heavily dependent on my daydreams, always thinking that I don't need to improve my reality since I have my fantasy world anyways and I thought that's enough. Oh boy, God woke me up and all I have to say is there was so much work that needed to be done through me internally. Needless to say it's 2024 now and I don't daydream about a desired reality anymore because I'm already working through getting that life and I'm finally improving myself. I have learnt to Love myself and Others. Improving and being happy with life... It's certainly not impossible at all. Though I must admit, It's hard and it takes lots of work, it's very worth it:) You got this. I believe in you. 👍🌺
@@Arifumiko I´ve taken the first step, and that's being aware that I have this same issue with daydreaming that you're all mentioning . I'm tired of it and if you are okay with sharing your process, I would like to know which things helped you to overcome this problem, also I would like to thank you for your kind words and sharing your story :3
damn i relate i little too much
@@anagy20 You're very welcome. What helped me the most is Working through myself consistently, thinking about positive things and having positive affirmations about myself, (I was told to do it many times but I always thought the idea was ridiculous cause that advice was too cliche, but now that I've tried it myself, I realized it was cliché for a reason 😂) and of course, being patient with myself. And Embracing my present and Completely eliminating daydreaming about my future because I know my future is completely dependent on what I do now in the present. And constant praying to God helped me a Lot. ❤️ I wish you the very best in your Journey and I hope you'll be able to overcome your trials. ❤️🙏
my girl just rebranded CBT as a DnD character sheet and its doing more than any therapist ive ever had has done
As long as it doesnt turn into dungeons and something else
RIGHT
I recently understood a basic assumption i had, which was weird to experience.
I always had the feeling that if I disagree with someone’s request they will either attack me or resent me, so whenever I disagree it comes out aggressive (but it’s full of fear). So this time, i disagreed with a senior at my job (in an aggressive assertiveness you may call it ) and i was expecting him to raise his voice or argue back, instead he just asked one more time with a very calm and caring voice, it got me by surprise. I still didn’t accept it, so now i was expecting him to resent me. The next day i stumbled him in the corridor, i said hello (considering he might just ignore me), again he said hello back with a kind manner.
Now that shattered my assumption, i disagreed and that was it.
Yet my way of disagreeing has yet to catch up with this shift. But it’s a weird feeling to think that how many more assumptions like this guide my day to day life.
life challenging your basic assumptions that you never even thought to question is wild, i know the feeling... here's to slowly untangling all the lies we've been telling ourselves! :D
My assumption is that I think ima looser?
Even when my parents actually talks good things about me there relative mostly .
Also on more
If u say NO to someone asking for help would make you totally rude and away from them. But it doesn't 🙏
“We’re not enemies, we just disagree” one of my favorite strokes lyrics🤣💀
Yeah this is huge, I struggle with this too but with criticism. Emotionally its like an attack, or like I’m being punished. Probably due to some kind of trauma. Taking antidepressants has helped.
@@CrystalRose1111 Same here! I think mine is also a learned behavior from trauma. It's like a irrational defense mechanism. I plan on trying therapy again, but I'll try to be more honest and write down what I can so I can get out of this accursed mindset once and for all. I hope you'll be able to achieve the same! 💚
im amazed with how well-edited and produced this video is!!
Thank you!! I really appreciate it 🌞
I came here to say that!
exactlyy!!
@@iCharlyprime Can you give me some tips on editing? Maybe share how you learned to edit. The minute details like, how you write the script, is there a template you use, how to put effects in video, which software and how exactly, how do you figure out what cuts to use like when to zoom in etc. Cuz that's what is hard to figure out.
You can make a whole video out of it. Or a series.
Not that it is absolutely necessary.
Anyway, I loved your video. I am also a daydreamer. Learning to edit and starting to make videos would take me closer to my daydream self so I'm working on it. I would definitely try out your notion template from this video.
Thank you for making this.
Omg precisely this!! It genuinely has to be the most well-edited video I've seen in genuinely... years. It's like a well-funded documentary made by professionals at their craft. Great script that catches your attention, and background music to keep a vibe, and little sound effects and pictures and text to really add the cherry on top. I'm not a video editor in any way myself, so I'm just in awe honestly because still I can notice that this was so good!!
For most of my life I've had this subconscious notion that certain parts of my life "don't count" because they wouldn't be entertaining/interesting for the plot of a fictional narrative. I've started reminding myself when I feel that way, that every moment still counts and deserves to be beautiful, deserves to be art. This character sheet process seems like a really good way to implement that!
I've had it too.
Great video!! This is literally psychology CBT (cognitive behavioral treatment, one of the most effective mental treatments we have), except you actually addressed the behavior aspect instead of just the cognitive mindset. So many people overlook that, so really glad to see that addressed
yessss! I knew it was a form of CBT, sooo awesome.
as a girl who’s currently in a whirlwind of change in my life and frequently wanting to run far away from it (and being obsessed with bg3 the past month 😭) i’m so happy the algorithm threw this incredible video on my feed. Instant follow!
what's bg3
@@nalbinalbii888 the game baldurs gate 3 mentioned in the video
@@madhattermegs9574 ahh i see ty
We are not alone 🥲
Same! Hello, friends 👋
in the past, people wouldn't have to put so much thought and curation into identity because they had stability and community relationships that shored up who they were (and wanted to be) over time. our current world takes away a lot of that stability and ability to maintain long-term community, and we're left kinda floundering
I’ve been thinking about this so much recently. I really miss that feeling of community. Especially now that I’m not in school, I feel like I’m floating out in space, and I have no idea who I am.
@@wizardlizard55555you are so real for this, i feel exactly the same...:( also just finishing uni and life's just so empty now
I believe it's not true. Even in that society, people suffered from emotional distress and committed suicides. Why do we see books with such dark content, like Dostoevsky's or Kafka's?
If you're different from others, if you feel bad, it makes you even more nauseous that there are constantly people around with whom you have to interact - it's disgusting and awful
of course there were difficulties and feeling estranged in the past as well, but our modern capitalist, post-internet world has physically separated people to an extent they never have been before.
also both those authors lived post-industrial revolution, which laid a lot of the cultural roots for our current lives
@yael5067 Yes exactly! To add to that, I think the intense reflection on identity is due to isolation. We are made to be social and when left alone we turn into ourselves. Our opinions of ourselves are merely our own reflections of others’ perceptions! And since our modern world is so isolated, alone, and withdrawn we(may)end up with an askew perception of ourselves. It’s the side effect of not receiving others opinions, essentially we’re all stuck in an echo chamber.
Community is key, and in our modern world I notice that the concept of community is dying. I mean when was the last time anyone saw kids playing outside? Their mothers or relatives sitting on the steps chatting? Not really happening anywhere sadly. Almost all neighborhoods I see look like ghost towns.
On a more positive note, similar to the point of the video, why don’t we act as the changing force? Reverse the introverted tendency of our modern society, actually take the step forward? When I was in highschool, after finishing my homework I would sit outside with a book/sketchpad/notebook etc and I would just chill for a few hours. I would strike up convos with people passing by or I would greet them. Essentially just acting open and friendly, which most people really enjoy. So (if your neighborhood is safe of course and if you also have the time of day)why don’t more people try this? Be the one who initiates that sense of community in ur neighborhood or wherever you live.
Best of luck!
Pax Vobiscum
As a 38 year old who has finally in the last 6 months felt like the version of myself I’ve always wanted to be, I am rooting you on and am so proud of you! It takes a lot of work to not put up with your own bullshit and get out of your own way but it’s worth it ❤
Could you guide me??
For anyone suffering from social anxiety. I had it in highschool and it was really bad. Not only I feared my classmates but I was so scared to talk to my family that I became a hermit. If you really want to improve your social skills and not be anxious trust me get out of your room, take time away from your phone and talk to who's infront of you. In that way you gain a friend, when you made one you start to practice to socialize with that person. Soon enough you'll start to realize your social skills are improving. As someone who's introverted talking was the only way to heal my social anxiety.
Thanks a lot! I'm struggling a lot with this daydreaming. It's literally become my life. So it came to the point when I'm talking with myself or have imaginary conversations with close ones instead of like actually talking to them, bruuuh. You saved my last month of the year❤
Just wanted to say it out loud to really let you know how I appreciate your work and consider it as an important topic❤❤, if you care about my opinion haha))
P.S. English is my second language, haha
yeahhhh, been there, super relatable😭 good luck in living in reality more, it's actually really pretty and just as exciting as daydreams, hope you learn to see that again!! :D
Ahh heavy on sentences two and three. Sending positive energy your way for 2024!
i think u have maladaptive daydreaming
@@leoor1111 Maybe💀 But, well, it getting better
@@leoor1111Same. That’s kinda just autism
The "what I want" *lifts astarion portrait* SENT ME TO SPACE
This video is truly like an answer of my prayers.I have this problem of maladaptive daydreaming since childhood, where i not just daydream but i suffer too a lot in my imagination.I have been praying a lot to get rid of this problem.I am going to implement this from now.Thank you charly for making this video.
I love this video too! Although for most if us watching, daydreaming might be a big problem, it doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing in all. I think having a great imagination and a mind that is able to dream big and wonder is a great gift to have. Don’t look at having an imagination as a problem, instead let’s just learn to better moderate it to a more healthy balance while still allowing ourselves with a time and place to let our imagination run wild. ❤
I feel this!
how’s the journey going?
God this is a mood
I relate to this so much
as a fellow dnd and notion girlie, my notion landing page/dashboard is loosely set up like a dnd character sheet and i have all my "stat blocks" for different aspects of my life:
- strength is strength workout plans
- dex is mobility workout plans
- constitution is mental health goals, affirmations, gratitude log etc.
- intelligence is personal library of articles, notes/typical second brain stuff, and things i want to learn more about
- wisdom was more for books i was reading/want to read, links to different video essays, notes/quotes that i found to be thoughtful or profound, and things in life i want to understand better
- charisma is all about relationships with myself and others (self-date ideas, CRM with friends birthdays, etc.)
i also have a lore category that contains my hobbies and skills, inspirations, daily journals, etc., my HP is a habit tracker, and all my goals were sorted into main quests or side quests! my notion is VERY MUCH a work in progress right now, but if it ever looks presentable to the world i'll put it out there lol. but i figured this might give you/any other dnd girlies some notion inspo!
if you ever do decide to make that template …send it over🫣🫣🫣 sounds epic
I’m someone who makes OCs for every piece of media I watch, elaborating on them so much and giving them beautiful stories. finally I can take that love for character making and writing, to improve myself for the new year! Thank you for this new perspective!
GIRLLL. GIVE ME THE LINKS?? OR USERNAME, Are you in ao3? I’ll take anything with Original character, there’s always so little OC works, let alone good story on top!!😭😢
@@KoreanStar-es8es OMG YOU WANNA READ? IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN ADD YOU ON TO SEND?
I WANT LINKS AS WELL
@@chipchrome1769 OMG ANYWHERE I CAN SEND THEM
you guys are giving me life rn 🤣
I'm obsessed with fantasy RPGs and i always play fierce, menacing, powerful female characters. Yet in real life i am such a pushover. I'm currently trying to summon the courage to end it with an alcoholic, addict boyfriend who takes a lot of my money. It's bad. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I, too, daydream about being the sort of woman who would simply leave when boundaries are being crossed.
i'm rooting for you! :) i believe in your potential to be fierce and powerful. i'll be thinking of you!
You got this
girl GET OUT! i grew up w an alcoholic father & the first man i fell in love with (surprise) was a raging addict and alcoholic himself. you need to get away from him!!! and i hope you already have!!! i know from experience.
this 14 minute video has helped me SO much more than dozens of other "motivational" videos, it's allowed me to actually put my goals into action very quickly with a non-complicated plan and has given me actual direction instead of a general idea
tysm for making this video and ty for making the template free idk how u dont have more subscribers
I usually don't comment on videos, but honestly this one just spoke to me. I've been living my daydreams for most of my life (I've kinda self diagnosed myself with maladaptive daydreaming tbh y'all). So yeah! I have a persona that I use pretty often when I enter a fictional world, so I think I'll be using them as a base. I'll definitely try this coming year (2024) to try and become like my persona (and a couple other favorite characters of mine hehe)
ANYWAYS I HOPE Y'ALL GET TO ACHIEVE YOUR DREAMS ♡! LEZZGO!
my biggest thing is that while i do want to become my daydream persona, it’s a lot scarier to do in real life 😭 in my daydreams there is no rejection unless i choose for there to be! but in real life ppl can perceive me and form their own opinions on me and i hate it :(
@@lilacfields SAME THO LIKE PPL BE ANNOYING US WITH ALL THEIR OPINIONS FOR WHAT
Can you people STOP SELF DIAGNOSING?!?! "Maladaptive daydreaming is familiar to me' or "I experience some core symptoms of [whatever it is]" like it is seriously so annoying when 1 out of 2 people say they're NeUrOdiVeRgEnT ..but it's not really diverging from the norm if if *is* the norm eh? Yeah. Stop.
@@NobodyImportant001 who’s gonna diagnose me?? my imaginary therapist??? i maladaptive daydream … i know i do. i really don’t need to pay a doctor to tell me that
@@NobodyImportant001 maladaptive daydreaming isnt a diagnosis, its more like a symptom. you can notice symptoms in yourself without diagnosing
It feels good to watch someone so real. Happy to see so many people who relate to you in the comments, makes me believe I CAN find female friends to talk about D&D and share notion templates with! I'll definitely share this 😊
So sorry, but if you don't mind me asking, what exactly is D&D and as I was typing I literally realized it's probably dungens and dragons...🤦😂
@@user-vl9yu1tq6h correct!
Girl. The editing! Perfection... the academy award goes to you.
This is so similar to the premise of CBT therapy but for free!! I love that you actually gave a practical way to keep track of your progress as well
I used to do this as a kid, but kind of gave up because it was too far of a stretch of who i was really.
When i was watching this video i thought to myself, "what if who i want to be is an asshole" but after watching the part about your character not fearing rejection or judgement i realised thats what i actually want for myself. I didnt want to be an asshole (i feared it!) I just wanted to be someone that wasn't afraid of judgment and not be a peoole pleaser.
Thank you really for that example. The words you used was a small change but fixed my wrong perception of my ideal self, so now I won't be afraid of my own character 😅❤🎉
The amount of patience to explain every single topic thoroughly, the editing, the level of relatability, this video is just so good!
the editing, the production value, the relatability...i think I just found my new fav youtuber
I've recently learnt about people creating alter egos for improving their lives and this video by far is the most practical and inspiring one on this topic. Thank you for the video and the character list!
Hey what a great video. It is on point with everything I learned in therapy. I actually scripted my life and wrote a new definition of what my life was gonna be, then I started chasing it despite fear, and lo and behold, I improved MASSIVELY. I'm talking "overcoming an existential crisis with panic attacks and DPDR" Massively. That is the way indeed, you expose the exact same things I have EXPERIENCED that work. Go at it!
Your video is genuinely inspiring and came to me at the right time. I just finished reading a self-help book (You Are A Badass) and while I don't necessarily agree with everything in it, it has reframed my perspective to allow me to change my life. That was the mindset shift I needed and your video is providing me the actionable tactics that I need (and actually feel more connected to as a needy person myself). Thank you for sharing the gift of you to the world!
what part of 'you are a badass' did you not agree with
@@dianaicnaiad The book can feel a bit ableist at times and assumes some base level of access to opportunity which I am in a fortunate enough position to be in to change my life. I absolutely love the book and have been recommending it to people in my life and at the same time I recognize that no perspective is perfect. Everyone is different and in completely different circumstances so while a shift in mindset is life changing there is no one size fits all approach.
This is like one of the only 2 or 3 motivation videos that feels like it actually gets me. Everything out there seems so vague, like if you just manifest enough and know what your goals are then you just instinctively should know what to do. But my mind doesn't work like that and it hasn't been getting anywhere .. this video gave me the inspiration and motivation I've been needing for so long. Thank you !!
Something that has helped me is I had to admit that I'm actually ruining my life by not changing my lazy habits and not doing things that would actually propell me toward my goals. Telling myself, "I have to get over this," instead of "I need to get over this," pushes me to really do something about my dreams and goals. Might not work for everyone, but sometimes I need internal pressure pushing me to focus on what has to be done, to live the life that will benefit me--which is not always what I want. (and when I say "want," I'm not referring to desires that will make me happy long-term, but "wants" that are harmful, like tubs of icecream or scrolling on my phone. Things that hold me back from my goals.)
I was just thinking about how I can change as a person, I usually fantasize A LOT about being better and having my desired life and personality but I never do anything and everything stays in my imagination, This video motivated me to finally make a change.
I'm DMing a new campaign soon and I was taking to my players about reworking some of their character goals because "running towards something is better motivation than running away." Then I thought about that for a second. Realized that I had abandoned everything I really loved just to avoid the possibility of failure. Now I'm in the process of reworking my entire life. 😅 I really related to your "if no one else is gonna throw me an intervention, I'll do it myself." I wish us both good luck on this journey!
Words cannot describe how proud I am of you and how grateful I am to be able to have such a talented, smart, caring and strong person in my life! This video is truly inspiring and I'm already on my way to use this template to the fullest. I can't wait to see what comes next in this journey! Love you, Gorge!!
Love you more ❤️ (text me how it went ;;;) )
Can someone explain what does
"My go-to treat" means?
Idk what to write in this section
@@erenikorllos9747”my go-to (add word)” means the thing that you usually have/do etc. In this case, „my go-to treat” means the treat you usually get for yourself, whether it’s food or anything.
As a girly who is experiencing loads of change this season of my life and feeling myself becoming something new but still not being sure *what* that new person is like; this video came like a godsend♥️ thank you
when i heard of dissociative identity disorder i was really lonely in my life. so, inspired by alters in a system, i invented characters in my head that would come help me with different things i could not deal with. one would deal with school, the other with sports, the other with self preservation. it was really nice. as i grew more confident and had more friends i lost these very late imaginary friends. i kind of miss them now.
I was wondering if i should do it, im scared of it turning into a real disorder tho... Did you have these concerns?
Haha damn. I relate hard core. The gochujang in the fridge, the face masks. The existential crisis about being addicted to video games. I've been on a similar journey. I applaud your effort to move forward with actions and intention and wish you well.
3 WEEKS UPDATE: Well, it's kinda not that productive in the beginning, but at least everything became more clear and organized in the mental/mind way. The system of "Who I wanna be in this week" is really useful as those crazy full schedules do not work for me. So it's a really good way to create a new habit!!
Also, I may say, that it can open new horizons - to challenge you for something new. In my opinion, it can be an incredible solution for some problems such as stagnation or uncertainty in life. Because it may bring you another way of thinking, another idea, another information. You don't know until you know.
So far I concentrated on my fitness life - dances, cardio, pilates. That also affected good on my sleep, visual appearance(make up), socializing, self-esteem, confidence - mostly thanks to dancing(dancehall female btw). Connecting with loved ones, including myself, as I have spent some quality time.
Thanks a lot! Hope everything will work fine in the 2024 too
olivia with ang’s arrow is something i never thought i needed but i’m happy it exists
This video was so joyful and positive even though it comes from a place of discomfort and not liking the life someone lives in right now. I know this feeling so well and to be honest: you inspired me so much! I will definitely try the notion page you linked and set new goals for each week. It seems like a more structured approach than daydreaming daily about how life could/should be like. This video was so healing for me and I just subscribed to you, because I really am looking forward to the next video
you like those characters also deserve community and significant bonds to heal and survive this life
Thank you so much, sending the love right back ❤️
This hit me on a personal level! Ive got in a university (in my country it considered as ivy league) and im the first generation who made it but i actually dropped out after two weeks because i didn't want to study my major. And my mom didnt let me tell anyone because everyone would be ashamed of me. I'm studying for university enterance exam again and i feel bad. Because im almost 19 and i have no passion or anything. And i dont feel like i can success this year. I'm feeling very bad for the past few months and regretting every decision ive made.
hey, 19 is very young! i cant imagine how hard it must've been to drop out after all that pressure and to live with it now. but you made a decision for yourself, supporting your heart, and i really admire that! that's brave and active and bold. a gap year is fine, just be sure to keep yourself busy, you'll discover many things that can lead you forward :D it'll be vague for a while, but clarity will come soon! hope you ace that exam
As a man I saw the same type of trend in myself (in thinking and in opening up myself to anyone), and I'm really glad to see fellow people opening up ONLINE about being who they are or want to truly be
it's great that you want to start opening up to people you should start by telling me your social security number and credit card number.
when you get it@@millerrepin4452, pass it on to me pls
@@millerrepin4452 asdgfjk this is so fucking funny
I too have been obsessed with bg3 and astarion these past couple months 😂😭 ive always lived in my head since i was a kid.. escapism via imagination and daydreaming of a better self overruled everything. But despite my love for anything that fuels this (ahem astarion………) too much of it pushed real life to the back burner. For about 2 years now ive been feeling severely stuck in life but your method makes it so much more fun and less daunting. Thank you!!
omg this video just got randomly recommended to me and I decided to give it a try, but ended up staying for the whole thing! The production is amazing and you've said the words I needed to hear. I really like this idea of creating a character for myself. Definitely gonna use your template! Thank you very much for this video!!
I hope all the girlies obsessed with bg3 finds their best selves this year
amazing amazing AMAZING video. your mind, your energy, your creativity is inspiring. you addressed some thoughts that i genuinely thought were exclusive to me and my experience in this nutty world. i immediately started daydreaming about filling out the template. mentally, i was creating a character who would actually get out of her head for once and do life irl. physically, i was starring out the window at the clouds. so i literally clocked myself for living even simple experiences through my imagination and came to write you a damn comment because you deserve it AND that's something i want to do; let other people know that their experience, knowledge, artistry and existence is incredible and impacting. i usually make compliments and comments in my head and feel satisfied with that, but i know the version of me that i wanna be today would make a physical effort in sharing my praise. cheers❤
avsolutly loved this, couldnt have come at a better time! thank you so much for the effort and love you put into this
So glad you liked it!!
Hey! I'm reading the book Cognitive Behavior Therapy, by Judith Beck. This therapy approach is guided by changing the patient's core beliefs (for example, a patient believes that the world is scary and this makes them anxious) and one of the best ways to do this is guide then to have them have experiences and see with their own eyes that their thoughts about the world were wrong. So I see that the activity you show us in your video is a way of realizing these core beliefs and changing them, documenting and being healed in some way (dealing with your hug problem is a good example).
PS: English is my second language, if I said something wrong don't blame me, just tell me. I'm still learning :)
This is way too relatable (especially the Astarion part)
Hi! this is the first video of yours I've ever come across and I just wanted to thank you! This video felt like a gentle undercurrent that's pushing me towards all the change I've daydreamed of making. I'm going to become a kinder, more patient and forgiving person who loves relentlessly and takes the time to be kind to all! (Think Tanjiro from demon slayer!) Thanks again for this!! I really, really appreciate it!
its a very gentle very sweet message, with some good energy too
i like how we all unapologetically delulu for Astarion. But on a serious note - girl, i have just discovered you, and now i'm questioning where have you been all these time? And i have to give special credits for editing. Chefs kiss
no way THIS HAS BEEN MY EXACT GOAL FOR THE PASY WEEK. REBUILDING MYSELF FROM SCRATCH AHHH
AMAZING VIDEO AMAZING HUMOUR AMAZING EDITING !!1!1!1!
when i was a child, daydreaming had been funny enough to keep distracted me. however, it's not enjoyable anymore but at the same time it became to really bad habit of me, so i can't live without daydreaming. i want to end it but i can't do it. it is like a bad dr*gs. they give you happiness first and when you get used to it they take what they give and other things. dangerous shit
8:35 this called me out in ways unfathomable ways so unfathomable that i needed to hear it
I don't think my mashup is humanly possible, because I already chose two very extraordinary characters. Like secretary Kim (what's wrong with secretary kim?) and Phryne Fisher (miss fisher's murder mysteries). Secretary Kim is incredibly polished and capable and ocd levels of prepared for absolutely everything with incredible dedication to her work and horrible hours spent working really hard for her boss. Then you have Phryne who's free spirited, relaxed and adventurous, always up to something interesting and partying then using her skills to solve mysteries while looking effortlessly elegant even when slightly messy. SO we have a strict, hard working and focused woman who performs like a super human and then a very yolo intelligent woman who's like sherlock levels of tuned in even when drunk. As a chronically ill person.... neither of them seem remotely possible lol. How the heck do you create your character without making them too perfect to be human?
I guess realizing that there are boundaries in what to expect from yourself, and making those expectations human. So instead of ‘I want to be super super smart’, something like ‘I want to invest more time in researching topics that interest me’ or ‘starting a new course on this or that subject so I can talk with people about this interest’. And also, thinking about why you like certain traits so much; Sherlock Holmes (for example, I don’t know your characters) is extremely smart and notices things other people don’t and this makes him super confident and people rely on him or admire him for it. Is it that you want to be super smart or you just want to be admired or be super confident? Thinking out loud here, but maybe analyze why these super human traits speak to you so much :). iCharly explained it as well, she doesn’t have Aang’s super powers but she can be as positive and kind as him (or at least try to be).
PHRYNE FISHER 💜💜💜💜💜💜
It sounds like a super fun challenge to mash those characters up into something that works!
incredible. love this 10/10. we love this existential era ✨😌
You won me at the minion making of the "just be yourself" because this quote is so well intentioned but so stupid. Our brains are designed to survive and save energy, just being yourself without having who you want to be in life in your mind will just make you end up doing the bare minimum to exist and not going after your dreams or goals
Here’s my situation: the “character” I want to become, is the me from three years ago. The me I was for my entire life. If anything, my current way feels like I’m playing a character . It feels inauthentic. It feels wrong. I don’t feel like I want to (or can?) entirely go back to being that person because things are so different. So in a way, my “character” is the false me, and I perhaps need to use this idea to shed “her” and re-become myself again. Thanks for letting me talk this out in this comment. A perspective.
This is the best video I have seen in a while. I dare to say, its the best video from all the "transformation & change" videos.
The editing is great, the connection between character creation and archetypes is stunning. And I love the warm, welcoming and playful energy you radiate. Thank you
you can do it, sending you clarity and peace on your journey
This is a wonderful concept. The way you explain everything without it feeling overwhelming. I absolutely love that you hit so close to home. You have excellent camera work and you're so naturally funny. This video was exactly what I needed to watch before the new year starts. ❤️
This is exactly what i need to wake me up. It's been in my watch later list like many other hundred videos, and I'm glad that I choose to watch this video.
Been living in my head for years, afraid of change and to let of comfort even though it's been killing me inside. daydreaming and never trying to make it into the reality and real me.
Not only is the editing great, presentation engaging, and the method creative and fun, but the sheer amount of honesty and self awareness on display is incredible
I rarely comment on videos, especially not on one of these about how to improve yourself but your thumbnail and the title just spoke so much to me and this is the first video that inspired me to really be my own dream person, thank you so much! 🥰
This video blew me away and I immediately shared it with a bunch of my friends. I love your energy, self awareness and insight and I was subscribed and notifications on quicker than I have ever before! Can’t wait to see your journey!
This is probably the best video I've watched on CZcams so far. In terms of content, video quality, editting.
I'm soooo proud of you!
This was the best edited and scripted video I watched all year! Girl you will be going places! The priest comment made me spit coffee all over my screen xD
This is a really interesting frame of mind.
I liked the day to day things being considered like hobbies and relationships. Makes the process a lot more grounded and realistic.
Great video!
I LOVE THIS VIDEO. So much. It’s like you found a way to pick into my brain that really makes me want to make changes without just seeing it as a road of impossible hurdles. It’s pretty straightforward and motivating. Gives me hope about life tbh
As someone with maladaptive daydreaming (and a ton of mental disorders yipee) this is actually so wholesome and helpful, I'll point out about the self compassion, my therapist always remember me that i have to treat me with the same care and compassion i treat everyone else, because if no one else is taking care of me at least i should do, it wont always be easy, pat your shoulder, cry a little and keep going!
The problem I'm having is that the things I am dreaming about are usually inherently unachievable, only achievable with compromises or only achievable later on in a long journey things.
Like, I will obsess about magic and wanting magic and understanding magic and becoming magic. My characters will be a different species and a different sex than mine (yea I'm trans). They won't have the same sexuality as me. They won't have the same sensory issues or other neurodivergent issues as me. And they're not as hard in freeze as me and just already are having a fitter body to work with. A lot of the time, having a situation where status isn't important and you're working in a team with no hierarchy is the whole appeal of it.
In big parts, I dream about a world where what disables me is accomodated for. I dream about having power and freedom and bringing skills to the table that are useful to people.
Great video! I love this playful take on personal development. You are completely right. Personal development doesn't need to be some sort of toxic-hustle-hellscape that it sometimes is portrayed as. It can be fun, playful, and wholesome! Thanks for sharing this!
ARE YOU ME? this entire video is exactly what I needed to hear today, thank you
spent an hour and a half filling out your list! this was great
you're very natural with the flow of this video and your editing and scripting is on point, genuinely amazed!
oh my god. this video describes EXACTLY my mindset right now, but to get to this point, it took me nearly 6-7 YEARS of having my own characters.
bg info: i am an artist, and have had original characters for as long as i can remember. but around when i was 15-16, i started noticing that their patterns of behaviour heavily mirror mine, and that their traumas and etc are very similar to my own experiences. they were also a projection of how I WANT to see myself, how I SEE myself, what are my most intense emotions and stress responces, etc.
in the age of 15, i also started questioning myself on who am i and what i want to do in this life. this lead to awful and big depressive episodes(even if there would be no war in ukraine, because i am an ukrainian refugee and this DID affect my mental health, i think the Intensity of these episodes would be the same, because my biggest worry at these times were "who am i and what i want to do?"), because i thought that i need to know myself in a way, where i could describe my personality in words and that i should've had a concrete plan for my future.
as the time passed on, ive had this realisation about my characters. that is - that they represent me and who i am. and because i struggled with my sence of identity, ive decided to take my main character's persona and put it on myself. took his name and sence of fashion, his body language, etc.
at first, yes, it did feel liberating and like everything clicked, but then comes the depersonalisation.
i started experiencing depersonalisation episodes, and at first, i thought it was simply because i dont see my character in myself in the sence of appearance. but after some time of thinking, something hit me - it was mostly because he and i are still different people and have different reaction mechanisms due to different life experiences, and THAT was the main problem. i did not associate myself fully with him, because i was still that person who i was all those years, just with a different appearance.
and that's where the mental work began. i am right now only on the beggining of this journey, because this realisation came to me not that long time ago.
basically, i do everything that the author of this video says(im sorry, i dont know her name since its the first video ive ever seen from her), but i just keep it in my head and just internalize all this process. at max, i write it down to my best friend, but only when it comes to sudden realisations which i have.
so this video was great for me, because it gives me the hope that i am not insane lol. knowing that there are people that use the same principle puts my mind at ease, since it feels like people who ive told all this think i am insane. thank you so much for this video :)
best of luck to you!
I know im probably not your target audience being a 33 y/o man but this video caught me at the perfect time to hear it and also you have a great way of presenting information, thanks hopefully i can get close to being the character i imagine . Nothing changes if nothing changes!
So you got yourself together... Unlike someone of us??
even though i've already watched this vidro twice (first because i got curious and clicked on it, second time because i want to follow along the process), i came back for a third time because your sense of humour just makes me happy. love to start my Sunday watching you!
The style of your video is super refreshing and genuine. I’m also trying to change my life and become my own person more and this video was the kick in the pants I need to keep on with that work
I actually really like this video a lot. It's got some really actionable steps and it allows you to really focus on what you really want out of your life (something that I'm only realizing now). One thing I would add to this is that I feel what would make starting this journey a lot easier is actually grieving the fact that who you are right now isn't who you dream to be at the moment. That you allowing yourself to emotionally feel grief in that you can't live in this fantasy in your head forever and feel happy. I think learning to first accept the scuffed person that you are now and forgiving yourself in the moment is key to moving forward. Overall really great video, gonna try this out when I get the chance. Thank you!
I am so proud of you for doing this and for making your Notion template available for free for other people to use. Also, LOVE the way you filmed and edited this! It must have taken a lot of time and effort, but it turned out amazing!
Heyy Can you please guide me how can I use this template?
I never thought I'd find a video and comment section that would help me feel "normal".
Thank you.....
"You're never gonna believe it unless you start acting like it"
GIRL✨👌😭🙏
"Just don't let it be a cult AGAIN" Okay, you hooked me here, i LOVE self help videos but the comedy just helps me understand better & pay more attention, thanks
I am 1:28 minutes into the video and I am just blown away by your creativity in the filming and editing process! It is so refreshing to see! Can't wait to see the rest of the video :)
Daydreaming is actually satisfying enough for my brain. I basically feed myself off the dopamine I get from fantasizing about what could be. Like, instead of reading, I scroll through Instagram. It's easier and it tricks my brain into feeling satisfied for the moment.
This is one of the hardest things I have to relearn, and I better do it quickly because this type of behavior costs me precious time.
This video essay hit hard, into the depths of my soul - and i am here for it! Keep up the amazing work!
I’m saving this video to so many playlists because as life hits me, one change after another, I think I should change too. And this sounds like the EXACT kind of approach I’m already working on, so thank you for the notion sheet to help me refine it
Same! Definitely saving it in my personal development playlist
Idk how to describe this but this video and struthless are the only ones that truly motivatw me to change. Idk if its the gameification, goal orientation, and customizability but these things are so sustainable for my growth
Great video!
Also a quick tip for everyone: Don't set yourself goals that are dependent on someone else to achieve. For example: "I want to be liked by more people"or "I want to get this job" rather formulate the goals like this: "i want to meet more people"-"i want to apply for this job".
Because you cannot control what others do, only your actions. This way you avoid setting yourself up for failure even if you did everything right/according to your character/wise mind.
i've never related to anyone more than i relate to you GIRL I'M SO GLAD I FOUND YOUR CHANNEL
Your system is actually helping me at the moment ! This character sheet allows me to focus on what I've been wanting to be without realizing ! It's fun to think of myself as the mix of my favorite characters, and it might be the key for me ! I usually struggle with taking a step back while reflecting on myself, but I lose less energy finding excuses because I look at what I could be instead of what I am failing at.
My ideal character traits are Composed, Androgynously Stylish, Kind, Unfazed, Strategic Speaker, Earnest (I used the word "composed" for general emotional management, and "unfazed" specifically for dealing with other people's opinions). It's crazy how I never realized that's what I wanted to be. Spontaneously I would have went with something like "original, smart, honest, creative..." but those are the compliments I used to get as a kid. Oops :o
the editing & whole vid is AMAZING!!! missed you charly
Thank you so much for sticking around 🥰
Girl, you have a witty and intelligent sense of humor. While still staying on topic and keeping focused. I can see your channel blowing up huge in the future. Really glad CZcams threw this video at me this morning. Subscribed.
2024 is almost here and that video was a great inspiration for what I can do differently to make this year better. Also, LOVE the editing!
The video just randomly popped up on my homepage but the Hozier in the intro got me:). Gonna go watch it and write more after
upd: thank you so much!! The video was really great, I’ll start to create my own character soon. I hope you have a nice day❤️
I hope you have the most wonderful day too, thank you!! ☺️
i guess im the same as you in a way, except its stardew valley instead of bd3. I love getting lost in my little fake farm life but it's been stopping me from working on myself. I've always lacked trust in myself, and I want to learn how to mend that. I also want to set goals, but I have no idea what a "reachable" goal looks like to me. It's a huge goal in itself for me to clean my room or do my laundry. I lack the self-efficacy to do anything beyond surviving and writing this comment. im going to the psych in March to see whats up but until then idk what to do.
I like never comment on videos but I thought this was just so well-made! A viewer can really tell all the hard work that you put into this; the editing, the organization, the captions (closed and otherwise) are all just gorgeous
Olivia the Last Airbender is giving me so much joy right now