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Every girl I've ever had a thing with has gone on to immediately have a nice long, successful relationship, including the only girl I've ever loved. So I try not to think about love too much. Thanks, Andrew.
Hey Andrew, your extra channel is an undercover unconcious therapeutic self-help-channel kind of. You should acknowledge that and maybe get new ideas by that, about what you want to do in the future with this channel. Almost everyone here just listens to you because its relatable and therapeutic. But i dont think youve woken up to that yet, you just go with the vlog thing without knowing exactly why it works. But there sure is more potential here.
You notice a lot of celebrities and millionaires deep down are miserable from only caring about themselves. Eventually they have a midlife crisis and don't know what they're chasing. Humans were made in a way that no matter how hard one tries you can't be truly happy being selfish.
MaximusXXX77 If everyone wants to find love so badly, then how is love not selfish? You don't love someone for their sake. You love someone for your sake. If you're doing it just for them, then that's not love it's charity.
Well it takes 2 people to make love happen. Wanting love is not selfish, because it's not something others can't have. It's just like friendship. People need friends or they become depressed. You don't do it for them, you don't particularly do it for yourself, you just do it because it makes you happy.
I think people get stuck waiting for the perfect scenario / person when we both know that won't come. The way I see it, you should date people not to find "the one", but to look for someone with enough potential to become "the one" with enough work and time. I agree with your idea of love and how it should be selfless. I think to get to a perfect relationship, you have to push though times of doubt and hardship to get the relationship you want. There are some scenarios where it is better to break off. That's a tough call and I don't see any clear way of telling
I like to think of relationships like a flower. Do you wan't to pick the flower from the ground and take it for yourself (only to have it die)? Or do you wanna water it, keep it in the sunlight so it grows to its fullest potential. Sometimes loving someone and wanting to see them grow means letting go of them, which is something I just did a couple weeks back. You can love someone in that sense, but it doesn't necessarily mean you should be together.
I don't think you can truly ever love someone else until you have learned to love yourself first. Without accepting every part of yourself and learning to embrace all your flaws, you will continue to turn your insecurities onto the other person. In my opinion a lot of people expect to just feel love for someone one day, I don't think it's that easy. Love is seeing all the flaws and accepting them, accepting the bad habits and working around them, recognizing all your partners fears and insecurities and know that you are that source of comfort for them, and working through all the challenges you may face alone or as a couple.
These vlogs are so great, like spending time every evening with a best friend I never had. I catch myself smiling and nodding to you Andrew. This is like the best hang out outside I ever had. We agree on almost every topic, our love and dating views and experiences are almost identical. It just shows how different we are from the young adults these crazy days.
Thanks for your videos, Andrew. I really enjoy watching them. I just ended a one-year relationship, my longest one by far. The effort that I put in and my increasing stress over it and what felt like my partner's lack of acceptance of me actually made me physically sick in the end. The relationship was one of the most difficult things I've done but also full of joyous and pleasurable and meaningful times. I had a moment like you where I just realized that if things were going to continue as they had, I couldn't stay with this person for another month or week, let alone the rest of my life. I was just as if not more unaccepting of him as he was of me. It was this constant effort to be better and fix our own issues combined with a looming sense of it not working and nothing changing. So I just walked away. I think that's what was best for both of us. I don't regret it at all. It's weird how you can be so close to someone, and then they're gone. I still don't know what love is. I'm pretty close with my nuclear family, and the way we treat each other and care for one another is love to me. Sex makes things weirdly intense, at least for me with my personality and being a female, but it's such a great part of life. So, here's to continuing to ponder and put ourselves in new situations with new people and alone with ourselves. Perhaps most importantly, I've learned a new level of self love. I thought I loved myself pretty well before, but it turns out there were parts of myself I didn't even know existed until I was in that relationship. Real love, or what we conceive of it to be, seems more like an eternal process than a stable, attainable thing or state.
gosh andrew I just really enjoy these philosophical videos of yours, as cheesy as it might sound, but in all honesty the couple of trees in the background, the water, really just the simple setting make for a good environment to talk stuff like this. I like the simplicity.
I've been married for 8 years. We dated for 5 years. We are high school sweet hearts. I'm not sure we were in love when we dated . We kinda both came from bad situation and homes . So we kind of leaned on each other and used one another for escape from reality. Now we are growing to know each other and with that we find out we are opposite of each other. . For example I love helping others he doesn't. I love to speak up for others he won't. But then we find it difficult to leave bc we have gotten so comfortable with the situation we are in and how we live. It's sad . We know we have to break it but ...not one of us has made the change. We get to a point that maybe we have love for each other but not falling inlove. ... im still waiting on my fairy tail but i think it's all a dream ... much respect to you Andrew -kimberlee from Austin Texas 💎
Why would you divorce? What do you mnea you ar enot in love anymore? For me this is very confusing. What makes you say that you both know you are not in love? Are you talking about the chemical love?
Thanks for this video, Andrew. I like how you approach this and other topics with brutal honesty. This is one of the reasons why I follow you. Great human being with a giant heart. Only few have that. I know this, too, sounds cheesy, but it's a truth that must be said. Keep up the good work! Peace.
I fell in love with a girl for the first time in my entire life not too long and I'm also 27. I didn't know until three months into the relationship and I was like holy shit. At that moment it felt like our hearts were like the roots from a tree that would connect and strengthen with each passing day. Like I said I had never fallen in love before so I was a bit confused as to what I was feeling so I asked her and she basically summed it up like you would do anything just to make the other person happy, even if that means they would be happier with someone else....And that's exactly how I felt. It's a great feeling man, and it's even better with the right girl, keep searching Andrew
One of my favorite mantras for love/relationships is the 60/40 rule that I heard from Justin McElroy. I'm not sure if it's his unique idea or not, but he says that in a healthy relationship one partner should be giving 60% of the effort towards the relationship at all times, rather than a 50/50 split. The key to fulfilling that goal is for both partners to be striving to be the 60% rather than the 40%. This way, you're not worried about "oh he's not pulling his weight" or "she doesn't do as much as me." It's a joint effort, and you should be willing to carry the load for the other person if you truly love them.
Your idea of love lines up with the way I see it, pretty closely. It's giving your effort to someone, being selfless and as the bible puts it "love does no harm". It's not infatuation or lust where you desire things for you and only you. At the same time, you can't let yourself become so invested that you aren't able to operate alone anymore, it's a mesh of caring for yourself and also truly caring for the other. I feel that same way. I haven't had any serious relationship in my life (I'm only 20, but still) yet I feel like I comprehend what love is supposed to be. This video reminds me why I've been a follower of not only your channel but a follower of you as well, because I relate a lot to your thoughts and perspectives. Great video man, your vlogs are priceless.
I love discussing stuff like this. So much so that I wrote a whole book called "Guest Bed," about a man debating these types of questions. But I think you're on the right track with your thoughts on love. I think when you're truly in love, there's nothing you won't do for that person. You care more about their happiness then you're own. You're excited to be there for her. You want to lift her up whenever she's down. She's the reason you get up in the morning. You're proud to be with her, and not just because she's beautiful, but because you know how special and amazing she is. In return, it should be someone who loves and respects you the same way. She should accept you for who you are (for the most part). I'm also putting a non-fiction book together now about what women really want men to be like when they go on a date. What they're idea of a perfect date is. I've been asking women of all ages on social media and I'm having a blast reviewing all the responses. There's definitely a few reoccurring themes. Anyway, you'll know it if you find someone that you want to be with long term. You don't have to be that selfless to get married, if you marry the right person because she'll support you in everything you do, so it will actually be a benefit to your own interests, as long as you are prepared (and want to) do the same for her. Find someone that when you're together it feels like you balance each other out. She strengthens your weaknesses and you strengthen hers. And yes, marriage is a lot of work, but very worth it if you find someone that makes you happy. Anyway, I could go on about this stuff forever because I'm a hopeless romantic myself, but I won't. In closing, I love your videos Andrew! Keep up the good work.
New fan here, very interesting to hear you talk. would love to kick it w you man. Just got out of a 2.5 yr relationship w the first girl I ever was in love with, first girlfriend too. I'm about to be 21. I don't think love is all about wanting to please the other person. I think of it as a deep care. A visceral, raw force of nature. I stayed committed to my girl from the time we got together till the day she split up with me. I had the same concerns as you, "could I be doing better", "Do I wanna spend the rest of my life with this person?". When I started to wonder, I'd think about what I really wanted. I'd think about if the relationship as it had been so far was worth the effort and the challenges associated. I knew that I'd always love her, and that loving someone doesn't mean you'll always be in each other's lives. Maintaining my sanity in that relationship required a lot of presence and awareness. Knowing that as attached and head over heels as I was, wanting to marry her and whatnot; I was with this person now, feelings could change, we didn't know what would happen. I loved hearing your thoughts bro.
Companionship. Companionship is key. I don’t know about you Andrew, but I have one best friend in my life. All my other friends are great but they don’t compare. My best friend is my brother (I’m a girl btw, just to provide some context). My brother and I have had a shitty life, growing up with an abusive and narcissistic mother and a somewhat emotionally distant father. All we REALLY had was each other. I only feel truly comfortable with my brother. I have severe social anxiety but with my brother, I feel like I am truly myself, 100% authentic, 100% present. I love him because I’ve seen him suffer, because I’ve realized what a blessing his companionship is in this hard life, bc we have learned to help each other along the way, since we know how hard it is. We find solace in each other - that’s the key. We find peace, solace, happiness in each other. Maybe it’s our unique circumstances that created this love between us. Maybe that’s what love is - a commitment to help one another through this hard thing called life. I don’t know how I would ever be able to marry someone with whom I wasn’t as comfortable as I am with my brother. It’s impossible. Thus, companionship before everything.
I think the marriages that work the best are the ones in which both people see an opportunity for personal growth in the relationship, both people have compatible life goals, and both people are making a commitment to stick with the other through thick and thin. Personal growth mostly comes from struggle and turmoil, and commitment empowers you a lot because it takes away the option of running away, which is the action that always seems to cause more problems than not in all kinds of situations. Another thing about commitment is that it inspires hope and security in other people. When you have someone that you know takes their commitment to you seriously, you can let your walls down with them in a way that you can't with anyone else. In a way commitment turns two people into one. Marriage isn't for everyone though, everyone has their own life path. Most importantly though, I think a person has to realize that whether they choose to find someone or not, they cannot run from their problems, and they ultimately have to deal with their emotional baggage and neediness. When you get into a relationship with someone you always bring your faults with you, and so does the other person. Passionate love is temporary and is just a result of a combination of animal instinct, mutual neediness, and projection, and it's a distraction from bigger life purpose.
The most insightful thing about these vlogs for me, is realising that someone 5 years older than me is going through the exact same issues as me. It's liberating to know that I'm not alone, yet also frustrating to realise that I may still be going through the same extasential neg in 5 years.
Hey Andrew, I think that next to the strong mutual phisical attraction like you said, when you look at someone and you know you're gonna love her/him no matter what just because her presence and ability to look at hear, hear her voice makes you happy is being a close friends in relationship, to have similiar views on love, life, religion, share interest and fulfill them. I saw that the happiest couples in my mind where those when the pair shared some passion eg. art, bikes and whatever.
be in love is all about confidence, you are confident that the person is right for you, and then work from there, when you are getting older you need as you said, yo be selfless to spend your time with them but knowing with confidence ehat you have the right partner. usually people choose wrong or without knowing she is the one, thath my opinion, hi from mexico! huge fan.
Tough questions. I’ve turned these questions around in my head and I also like the idea of unconditional selfless LOVE with capital letters, but I think that can be developed for life itself and all beings as a background framework of being. And from that pedestal it feels natural to explore the egoic tendencies of the mind (lust/passion/interest). I guess I think you need both independence/complete universal love AND a passion for the other person. It’s like there’s your relationship to yourself and life itself as the main relationship of life and then you can develop adjunct relationships which can become intimate, but you always need that background “love/independence” or else you will inevitably become clingy, needy, and selfish in relationships. I think I feel it’s normal and human to have desires and “selfishness” in relationships to some extent but I feel you on the selfless form of love - “I legitimately want the best for you” - I think both are healthy and natural and probably should exist together. I don’t think it’s bad to want someone if there is respect and legitimate desire for them to be happy not just you. It’s a give and take. But idk it’s confusing and I often change my thinking on this stuff..
I definitely feel the same way as you, that my personality wouldn't allow me to stay committed to one person for the rest of my life. But I also think that you go into a relationship to grow and to give. And if you're able to continue growing with a person, then there will never be a reason to break it off. That's not the case with all relationships, and there's nothing that can be done about it when the relationship has run its course. Its selfish to stay with someone if this is the case (even if you've been married for a long time).
Andrew!!!!! I don't know if you are going to spend the rest of your life sing;e BUT I do know that right now I can totally relate to you and I am totally grateful for you sharing your experience of life with us! I just felt this had to be said! In the meantime CHEERS, go on dates and drink!!
Hey Andrew. We're close in age ( I'll be 27 this month) I think your definition of love is pretty on point. I met my now wife 4 years ago and we've been married for alittle over 2 years. We share in the raising of her daughter (13). Love is a desire for a life long companion. Someone who shares similar interests & is open & honest above all else. We were friends for about a year before it became romantic. Shortly thereafter we both knew that we had found that in one another. Nothing to be forced. Just take life as it comes. Keep yourself open to new experiences & don't be afraid of being hurt. ~wish you happiness mate
I am one of your subscribers who actually is in a relationship. It's been almost 6 years since we're together. I would like to share my idea of love with you, as you asked for. I do not usually want to share my thoughts in public like this, but I feel like I want to do so now because it's the least I can do for you since you made me laugh so many times. I enjoy your videos and I’d like to see them coming, regardless of their nature. I don’t care if it’s about pranks, or if it’s about talking or what not (I prefer the talking ones though). I hope you will find useful things in what I’m about to say. You said that all these romantic movies and what not tend to distort what love is and I agree with that. I do so because we grow up with all these images of what love is that it becomes so hard to think about it yourself. You get stuck with some fantasies and fairy tales that you come across and you take it as it is presented to you. Well… I always analyse what I hear and wonder if it really applies for me, if it really it logical for me. This is how, at one point, I asked myself „what is love actually?” Because, as you said…is it something that once I possess, everything else in life becomes easy and amazing? Well, I saw for myself that all these images about love didn’t work. There was always one point in which the way I loved didn’t fit the description. I won’t bother you now with all the chain of questions and answers that I went through to get to what I think now, but I will share the main ideas. For me, unconditional love is the only form of love that exists. This sounds like the clichéd quotes online, but… what I’m trying to say is that once you have a reason behind it, it isn’t actual love anymore. I cannot say about a girl (for instance) that I love her because she is hot. I cannot say that I love her because of the way she does something for me. I asked myself what would happen when/if she wouldn’t be hot anymore, if she would stop doing the things that I was loving her for. Then my expectations would not be satisfied anymore and I would stop loving her? Because I would be kind of not interested anymore if she wouldn’t. Well how does this fit the description of love, the greatest feeling of them all? That was supposed to be so unbelievable hard to get rid of. The explanation for this was that the feeling that I thought was love in those situations wasn’t actually love. It does not make sense for love to depend on the benefits that a relationship brings. I came to think that love is something that I unconditionally share with everybody until they give me a good reason not to. And for me, those reasons are mainly referring to people that have no respect for others and couldn’t care less about how their choices in life will affect other lives. Apart from that, I truly believe that love is what I equally feel towards everyone. I think this is what binds us humans and creates the need of not being alone. You might ask yourself now how does everything I’ve just said relates to the kind of love that you were talking about, which is being in love with someone as in having a relationship. Well, I had to say all that… otherwise my next idea would seem strange at first. I think that the level of bonding that you feel towards different people has nothing to do with love. I just consider that there are different levels of attraction that you feel, levels that are independent of the love I was talking about earlier. So, what establishes for me these different levels? Well, it’s related to what someone thinks. I repeat…what some thinks! Not what I interpret about what someone is doing, but the mentality behind what someone is doing. I am a strong believer in the fact that being subjective changes reality. Once you involve your opinions and your feelings into something, it becomes personal and reality changes as well. As an example, it is true and real that that sometimes it rains? Well, of course… But what if I take it further and say that I do not like rain? Is it undeniably true that rain is bad and we should not enjoy it? Well, no… and once I involve my opinion, the truth remains the same, it is just raining. How I feel about it may be true about what I feel, but it is not true about rain. And getting back now to the idea, the same thinking applies for people. I will never judge someone by what I interpret and what I feel about what they are doing, but by how they think and what leads them to the choices they make. The levels of attraction that I was talking about depend on how much of how they think is similar to what I think. Another thing that helps me a lot is to think that the less I expect from someone based on my subjective thinking, the more chances I have to get along just fine. We’re all different and I really get that. This is why I don’t want to have friends based on similar life styles, based on family, or based on similar hobbies. The only dependent I have here is how they think. Not the colour of their eyes, not the colour of their skin, not what they have or anything as such. Just what they think. Again, based on the thinking similarities I will choose to whom I speak with, who I want as friends, as close friends and, at the top of this list, as my dearest and closest friend who you might call „ girlfriend”. That would be someone who I get along with so well just because we think the same way about important things in life. It would be someone who has the freedom to do whatever they desire and that desire includes being besides me, because we can relate to each other so well. Not to have any expectations, but to accept everything I do because they understand that I have to do what I have to do in order to be happy. And I’m not talking about someone who thinks and feels and does everything that way I do. But the few things that help two people stay together and have trust, such as communication, honesty, attachment, loyalty, thoughts about what living together means. I am not saying that we should both play volleyball because I would like my girlfriend to play too. Well, this relates back to what I said about expectations and the less I have to easier it gets to connect with someone. The point was that being in love for me is the feeling I have towards such a person. And I’m saying this because I felt it and I am still feeling it towards my girlfriend. I know it can be difficult to meet such a person and it takes a lot of time. To have an idea, I’m 23 years old now and we’ve been together for almost 6 years. This means that we were together since we were teenagers, which is the period of life in which you start thinking about life… Maybe this is why we get along so well, because we grew up thinking together. Anyhow, it is possible. But you see, the thing is that I do not feel that I must have this closest friend besides me. I do not think that I cannot live without someone like that and you said something similar in the video if I remember well. Well, I do say that being attracted to someone the way I am to her might be of great help when it comes to being happy, but I can only say this applies for me. Being happy has less to do with achievements or people besides you than it has to do with the way you think. Because I choose what to feel about something that happens. So getting to your thoughts about falling in and out of love and how you would know if you’re supposed to put in the effort or just let it go… Well, based on the way I think it’s fairly easy to know what I should do. I think that change is the only thing that never changes. This is why I will accept any change in life, even if it means changing the way someone thinks. If that someone is my girlfriend and she decides that her life should be different, I will not oppose. I will not force anything with people. I am not supposed to work on someone else’s happiness. Happiness is something that we are responsible for ourselves. It does not depend on what my girlfriend/wife does. I do not intend to make someone feel like they should do something they do not wish to do just to make me happy. That is not freedom and not being free will get to you at one point. This is why I believe that marriages fall apart. Because people rush into things anyway and do not think if they should really end up marrying someone or not. The way I think will always help me know if I want to have someone besides me or not and also why! Being open minded and understanding `different` and `change` will always help me decide if something is worth fighting for or not.
love is when u think of them subconsciously, you imagine them in your thoughts, you care for them, you dont expect care in return, though its great to have it back. When you love, it has to be unconditional, and whoever it is that you love, occupies a great deal of space in ur mind and heart... you might have "whoops" moments here and there, but at the end of the day, its just that one person..
Love to me is what you said, this unconditional need to give plus taking out the edge when you argue bc chances are you two gonna have a lifetime of arguing ahead of you down the road and being willing to crack jokes and go along with it when your partner does it to break the tension either halfway through or after a fight
Andrew this video was dope. It was like meditation for my self. I reflected on everything u said and compared it to my own life. The vibes were so chill too. Please make more of these
I feel you on deep level man.. I feel like we have a lot of the same personality traits and life experiences. I'm 22 and never really been in a real relationship only flings with girls here and there. I've had opportunities to get into relationships in the past and backed out due to commitment issues or just not knowing how to be in a relationship. Sometimes I wish I had gone through with it so I could have gained the experience. Been feeling lonely as fuck more recently and wondering if i'll ever find a girl i'll actually feel like putting in the effort with but trying to stay positive and put myself out there more. Best of luck to you on your journey.
I think being in love means knowing others flaws in detail and still wanting to be with that person and work together thought each others problems. When your attachment to that person is stronger than any hardship then that's how you know you should stay and fight through problems
Good to see how raw and real you are Andrew. You're only 27 and it seems silly to think you'll be single forever. You're so damn likable the idea you'll never find someone for you is honestly nonsense. Best of luck my friend
Your talks are deep & meaningful to me! Thanks bro! I am in a 4 year relationship & just recently moved across the country because our relationship was taking a mental toll & effecting my happiness. Dont get me wrong I fucking love this girl but sometimes I guess I can make her crazy. Like reallly crazy where I literally have no idea what to say to calm her down & it always seems to stem from something wrong with me. Like if im not in the mood to talk ,My "Vibes", or maybe our past. Mind you I met her when I was 16 and she was 23. So im 20 now and I made this huge decision for our happiness and Im stuck between "Stick it thru" and maybe we both grow enough or Just break up with the first girl that showed me true love. I honestley am sick of being someones "Drug" because I really dictate how shes feeling and its waaaay too much for me to handle.
Love your videos and vlogs especially Well I was going to share but now I'm like what's the point I think it's a great thing to be able to date early and multiple people so you can learn and have experience with it
Love is one of the few things you can't define because everyone has their own opinions and everyone will disagree with almost everyone else on some level. I guess I'd say it's when you have someone that you know can't save you or make your life perfect but you still feel completely at ease and yourself around them and feel like they care about and make you better just as much as you do for them
I think love is when u both want to make each other happy as u said and u enjoy each other's presence. I think that's the main thing is that u enjoy each other's company and u have an emotional connection. And u understand each other
I think love is just willing to share a part of yourself with another person, whatever that may be, but not depend on them for your own happiness, it's like a friend, you don't solely rely on a friend for happiness, a friend simply is there and helps when you need it, I think that's love.
i watch your videos when im depressed which had ben about 3 months ongoing now cause me and my girlfriend have been going through it and today we broke up and lofe seems pointless but when i watch your vids it seems ok, youre my only friend Andrew so thank you, even though these videos are old I love you
Hey Andrew, my thoughts on this situation are also muffled at this time. Currently in a almost 5 year relationship which has been strong and well. Now I am 22 and I'm currently thinking about different lifestyles and experiencing a new adventure. This being my first relationship and not have been with any other women, I feel confused as to if i'm making the right decision with leaving or if i'm making a big mistake. I am comfortable and happy with where I am, but i also want to experience different types of love and affection. Over the past few years I have contemplated this decision and I always turned it down, I think because I am scared of going on my own. It is a tough situation to handle and I hope I end up making the right decision. Hope this gets read :)
I feel like love is going through the tough times and never giving up and growing with a person and not regretting any of it, if that makes sense. Been in a very happy relationship for almost 2 years.
I think early in on a relationship it's important to resist the urge to put in work, you need to be who you are comfortable being day by day because that's who you are comfortable being in the long run and she might fall in love with the guy who is putting in work and that might not be who you are, so early on in a relationship try not to change yourself or your actions very much because that energy and excitement won't last forever and when it's gone there's a good chance the relationship might collapse. Also you had a thought about, "can I do better?" you shouldn't date a girl at all if you think you can do better. Ideally it shouldn't even be something you think about but I can understand the thought and concern.
@lahwf To answer your question, I think it's caring more for someone else's well being than your own, then acting accordingly. regardless of how it effects you
i am beginning my first relationship at the moment. my idea of love is what my parents have. it's like at the end of the day, even though they bicker and fight, they love each other even after 27 years and getting married after 10 days of knowing each other. it's a lot of compromising and selflessness for sure. also just loving and appreciating the other person for who they are. idk i'm only 19 going on 20, and my girl and i are just kids having fun. when falling out of love, i think it's worth reconciling or whatever if you know it's worth it to you. if the other person doesn't think so or try, then it's time to move on.
Wow just watching this opened my mind on how crazy humans r in a good way we constantly think about deep thoughts and ask a lot of questions the human brain is so magnificent
Andrew, you should read Neil Strauss' 'The Truth'. It deals with fear of commitment and whether monogamy is natural and basically all of what you've said in the video. Was really mind-opening for me
Love is the increase in dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin. These are the same chemicals that prescription drugs increase to battle anxiety, depression, bipolar, and other mental health
I was in love for about a year and half with this girl. After that much time it starts to become work to keep everything going. I was willing to put the work in and keep it going. I guess she wasn't. Different factors in the relationship probably caused her to lose her grip on it. She ended it with me and was devastated. Still getting through it actually. Love is when you give your everything to someone but you have to be careful that they do the same in return.
Hey andrew I've been having a lot of anxiety lately and your vlogs are always so calming and you're funny as shit. Also i have the same issues on love as you... Commitment issues lmao, very fun. #keepitupDad
I feel like Andrew is my friend watching these vlogs and he's talking straight to me OT4Y OT4Y
Liked before watching whoops
lol watched your video that was on r/videos the other day, goddamn funny buddy.
Small world
@@malcolmgrant8 you
Andrew Vlogs are the absolute best on CZcams. Feels like i'm talking to my best friend.
Exactly
same for me
Kevin Garvey yes
Right!
Love is when you prank a hot girl and the comments tell you that you could have gotten her number if you tried.
Love is watching Andrew Hales's videos. Be it pranks, vlogs, skits or Chatting withs, all of them are fun.
Got recommended this vid again. It's like catching up with an old friend that you only see once in a couple of years or so.
Every girl I've ever had a thing with has gone on to immediately have a nice long, successful relationship, including the only girl I've ever loved. So I try not to think about love too much. Thanks, Andrew.
I hope you're doing fine man
live love lahwf
Hey Andrew, your extra channel is an undercover unconcious therapeutic self-help-channel kind of. You should acknowledge that and maybe get new ideas by that, about what you want to do in the future with this channel. Almost everyone here just listens to you because its relatable and therapeutic. But i dont think youve woken up to that yet, you just go with the vlog thing without knowing exactly why it works. But there sure is more potential here.
Confidence is not knowing she'll like you, confidence is knowing you'll be fine whether she likes you or not.
+1
You notice a lot of celebrities and millionaires deep down are miserable from only caring about themselves. Eventually they have a midlife crisis and don't know what they're chasing. Humans were made in a way that no matter how hard one tries you can't be truly happy being selfish.
Google User Nobody is truly happy. Everybody's fucking depressed.
When you find love, you will be truly happy. Nothing in life matters except for friendship and love.
You make a very good point. Self-indulgence leads to unhappiness.
MaximusXXX77 If everyone wants to find love so badly, then how is love not selfish? You don't love someone for their sake. You love someone for your sake. If you're doing it just for them, then that's not love it's charity.
Well it takes 2 people to make love happen. Wanting love is not selfish, because it's not something others can't have. It's just like friendship. People need friends or they become depressed. You don't do it for them, you don't particularly do it for yourself, you just do it because it makes you happy.
"Whoops treated" needs to be the next tshirt design
I'm addicted to intimacy, it's one of the only things that gives me a rush of good feeling in life.
TonyJH wanna dink?
TonyJH try doing drugs
I think people get stuck waiting for the perfect scenario / person when we both know that won't come. The way I see it, you should date people not to find "the one", but to look for someone with enough potential to become "the one" with enough work and time. I agree with your idea of love and how it should be selfless. I think to get to a perfect relationship, you have to push though times of doubt and hardship to get the relationship you want. There are some scenarios where it is better to break off. That's a tough call and I don't see any clear way of telling
Your voice is super relaxing
Life is so confusing.
I like to think of relationships like a flower. Do you wan't to pick the flower from the ground and take it for yourself (only to have it die)? Or do you wanna water it, keep it in the sunlight so it grows to its fullest potential.
Sometimes loving someone and wanting to see them grow means letting go of them, which is something I just did a couple weeks back. You can love someone in that sense, but it doesn't necessarily mean you should be together.
I don't think you can truly ever love someone else until you have learned to love yourself first. Without accepting every part of yourself and learning to embrace all your flaws, you will continue to turn your insecurities onto the other person. In my opinion a lot of people expect to just feel love for someone one day, I don't think it's that easy. Love is seeing all the flaws and accepting them, accepting the bad habits and working around them, recognizing all your partners fears and insecurities and know that you are that source of comfort for them, and working through all the challenges you may face alone or as a couple.
Love these videos lately and hearing your insight on these topics. Especially as they are very relevant to my situation right now.
These introspective talks are awesome Andrew. I get you can't do these types of videos all the time, but whenever you can it's appreciated!
These vlogs are so great, like spending time every evening with a best friend I never had. I catch myself smiling and nodding to you Andrew. This is like the best hang out outside I ever had. We agree on almost every topic, our love and dating views and experiences are almost identical. It just shows how different we are from the young adults these crazy days.
Thanks for your videos, Andrew. I really enjoy watching them. I just ended a one-year relationship, my longest one by far. The effort that I put in and my increasing stress over it and what felt like my partner's lack of acceptance of me actually made me physically sick in the end. The relationship was one of the most difficult things I've done but also full of joyous and pleasurable and meaningful times. I had a moment like you where I just realized that if things were going to continue as they had, I couldn't stay with this person for another month or week, let alone the rest of my life. I was just as if not more unaccepting of him as he was of me. It was this constant effort to be better and fix our own issues combined with a looming sense of it not working and nothing changing. So I just walked away. I think that's what was best for both of us. I don't regret it at all. It's weird how you can be so close to someone, and then they're gone. I still don't know what love is. I'm pretty close with my nuclear family, and the way we treat each other and care for one another is love to me. Sex makes things weirdly intense, at least for me with my personality and being a female, but it's such a great part of life. So, here's to continuing to ponder and put ourselves in new situations with new people and alone with ourselves. Perhaps most importantly, I've learned a new level of self love. I thought I loved myself pretty well before, but it turns out there were parts of myself I didn't even know existed until I was in that relationship. Real love, or what we conceive of it to be, seems more like an eternal process than a stable, attainable thing or state.
gosh andrew
I just really enjoy these philosophical videos of yours, as cheesy as it might sound, but in all honesty the couple of trees in the background, the water, really just the simple setting make for a good environment to talk stuff like this. I like the simplicity.
These are the only vlogs I've ever actually followed on CZcams.
I've been married for 8 years. We dated for 5 years. We are high school sweet hearts.
I'm not sure we were in love when we dated . We kinda both came from bad situation and homes . So we kind of leaned on each other and used one another for escape from reality. Now we are growing to know each other and with that we find out we are opposite of each other. . For example I love helping others he doesn't. I love to speak up for others he won't. But then we find it difficult to leave bc we have gotten so comfortable with the situation we are in and how we live. It's sad . We know we have to break it but ...not one of us has made the change. We get to a point that maybe we have love for each other but not falling inlove. ... im still waiting on my fairy tail but i think it's all a dream ... much respect to you Andrew
-kimberlee from Austin Texas 💎
Dang. Thank you for sharing
Why would you divorce? What do you mnea you ar enot in love anymore? For me this is very confusing. What makes you say that you both know you are not in love? Are you talking about the chemical love?
Thanks for this video, Andrew.
I like how you approach this and other topics with brutal honesty. This is one of the reasons why I follow you. Great human being with a giant heart. Only few have that. I know this, too, sounds cheesy, but it's a truth that must be said. Keep up the good work!
Peace.
Whatching these vlogs really relaxes me.
Thank you Andrew.
your warmth and fulfilling desire to connect with people has changed my life and made me confident to be myself thank you!!
wow im really glad i found your channel, your vlogs are very relaxing idk why, keep up the wood gork andrew!
I fell in love with a girl for the first time in my entire life not too long and I'm also 27. I didn't know until three months into the relationship and I was like holy shit. At that moment it felt like our hearts were like the roots from a tree that would connect and strengthen with each passing day. Like I said I had never fallen in love before so I was a bit confused as to what I was feeling so I asked her and she basically summed it up like you would do anything just to make the other person happy, even if that means they would be happier with someone else....And that's exactly how I felt. It's a great feeling man, and it's even better with the right girl, keep searching Andrew
One of my favorite mantras for love/relationships is the 60/40 rule that I heard from Justin McElroy. I'm not sure if it's his unique idea or not, but he says that in a healthy relationship one partner should be giving 60% of the effort towards the relationship at all times, rather than a 50/50 split. The key to fulfilling that goal is for both partners to be striving to be the 60% rather than the 40%. This way, you're not worried about "oh he's not pulling his weight" or "she doesn't do as much as me." It's a joint effort, and you should be willing to carry the load for the other person if you truly love them.
Stop looking for your soulmate. Start looking for your soul, mate.
seigmann2 uuuuuhhhh!
He has soul, and his soul wants to find love. Not as quippy as your comment, but more truthful...
Deep.
based aussie wisdom
Deep bruh
Your idea of love lines up with the way I see it, pretty closely. It's giving your effort to someone, being selfless and as the bible puts it "love does no harm". It's not infatuation or lust where you desire things for you and only you. At the same time, you can't let yourself become so invested that you aren't able to operate alone anymore, it's a mesh of caring for yourself and also truly caring for the other. I feel that same way. I haven't had any serious relationship in my life (I'm only 20, but still) yet I feel like I comprehend what love is supposed to be. This video reminds me why I've been a follower of not only your channel but a follower of you as well, because I relate a lot to your thoughts and perspectives. Great video man, your vlogs are priceless.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts in these videos. It shows your personality and how beautiful of a person you are. :)
I always like the video before I even watch it. Great chat Andrew, keep them coming!
I love watching ur vlogs when I’m high they help me think deeper even if it’s one with no point I love you and chad’s personalities
I think the Cavs will end up trading him
hahahahahahah
TheRealBeatMaster you were right
Liked, whoops
you're so wise and i love watching these videos
Watching yours videos its the best, this is my favorite one. Its like talking to my best friend.
Please never stop these vlogs even though the pranks keep rising
I love discussing stuff like this. So much so that I wrote a whole book called "Guest Bed," about a man debating these types of questions. But I think you're on the right track with your thoughts on love. I think when you're truly in love, there's nothing you won't do for that person. You care more about their happiness then you're own. You're excited to be there for her. You want to lift her up whenever she's down. She's the reason you get up in the morning. You're proud to be with her, and not just because she's beautiful, but because you know how special and amazing she is. In return, it should be someone who loves and respects you the same way. She should accept you for who you are (for the most part). I'm also putting a non-fiction book together now about what women really want men to be like when they go on a date. What they're idea of a perfect date is. I've been asking women of all ages on social media and I'm having a blast reviewing all the responses. There's definitely a few reoccurring themes. Anyway, you'll know it if you find someone that you want to be with long term. You don't have to be that selfless to get married, if you marry the right person because she'll support you in everything you do, so it will actually be a benefit to your own interests, as long as you are prepared (and want to) do the same for her. Find someone that when you're together it feels like you balance each other out. She strengthens your weaknesses and you strengthen hers. And yes, marriage is a lot of work, but very worth it if you find someone that makes you happy. Anyway, I could go on about this stuff forever because I'm a hopeless romantic myself, but I won't. In closing, I love your videos Andrew! Keep up the good work.
New fan here, very interesting to hear you talk. would love to kick it w you man. Just got out of a 2.5 yr relationship w the first girl I ever was in love with, first girlfriend too. I'm about to be 21. I don't think love is all about wanting to please the other person. I think of it as a deep care. A visceral, raw force of nature. I stayed committed to my girl from the time we got together till the day she split up with me. I had the same concerns as you, "could I be doing better", "Do I wanna spend the rest of my life with this person?". When I started to wonder, I'd think about what I really wanted. I'd think about if the relationship as it had been so far was worth the effort and the challenges associated. I knew that I'd always love her, and that loving someone doesn't mean you'll always be in each other's lives. Maintaining my sanity in that relationship required a lot of presence and awareness. Knowing that as attached and head over heels as I was, wanting to marry her and whatnot; I was with this person now, feelings could change, we didn't know what would happen. I loved hearing your thoughts bro.
Companionship. Companionship is key. I don’t know about you Andrew, but I have one best friend in my life. All my other friends are great but they don’t compare. My best friend is my brother (I’m a girl btw, just to provide some context).
My brother and I have had a shitty life, growing up with an abusive and narcissistic mother and a somewhat emotionally distant father. All we REALLY had was each other. I only feel truly comfortable with my brother. I have severe social anxiety but with my brother, I feel like I am truly myself, 100% authentic, 100% present. I love him because I’ve seen him suffer, because I’ve realized what a blessing his companionship is in this hard life, bc we have learned to help each other along the way, since we know how hard it is. We find solace in each other - that’s the key. We find peace, solace, happiness in each other.
Maybe it’s our unique circumstances that created this love between us. Maybe that’s what love is - a commitment to help one another through this hard thing called life.
I don’t know how I would ever be able to marry someone with whom I wasn’t as comfortable as I am with my brother. It’s impossible.
Thus, companionship before everything.
I love the editing man. The vlogs feel much better 👌
We think the exact same way. Comforting to know that other people think like me.
I think the marriages that work the best are the ones in which both people see an opportunity for personal growth in the relationship, both people have compatible life goals, and both people are making a commitment to stick with the other through thick and thin. Personal growth mostly comes from struggle and turmoil, and commitment empowers you a lot because it takes away the option of running away, which is the action that always seems to cause more problems than not in all kinds of situations. Another thing about commitment is that it inspires hope and security in other people. When you have someone that you know takes their commitment to you seriously, you can let your walls down with them in a way that you can't with anyone else. In a way commitment turns two people into one.
Marriage isn't for everyone though, everyone has their own life path. Most importantly though, I think a person has to realize that whether they choose to find someone or not, they cannot run from their problems, and they ultimately have to deal with their emotional baggage and neediness. When you get into a relationship with someone you always bring your faults with you, and so does the other person. Passionate love is temporary and is just a result of a combination of animal instinct, mutual neediness, and projection, and it's a distraction from bigger life purpose.
The most insightful thing about these vlogs for me, is realising that someone 5 years older than me is going through the exact same issues as me. It's liberating to know that I'm not alone, yet also frustrating to realise that I may still be going through the same extasential neg in 5 years.
Hey Andrew, I think that next to the strong mutual phisical attraction like you said, when you look at someone and you know you're gonna love her/him no matter what just because her presence and ability to look at hear, hear her voice makes you happy is being a close friends in relationship, to have similiar views on love, life, religion, share interest and fulfill them. I saw that the happiest couples in my mind where those when the pair shared some passion eg. art, bikes and whatever.
be in love is all about confidence, you are confident that the person is right for you, and then work from there, when you are getting older you need as you said, yo be selfless to spend your time with them but knowing with confidence ehat you have the right partner. usually people choose wrong or without knowing she is the one, thath my opinion, hi from mexico! huge fan.
Tough questions. I’ve turned these questions around in my head and I also like the idea of unconditional selfless LOVE with capital letters, but I think that can be developed for life itself and all beings as a background framework of being. And from that pedestal it feels natural to explore the egoic tendencies of the mind (lust/passion/interest). I guess I think you need both independence/complete universal love AND a passion for the other person. It’s like there’s your relationship to yourself and life itself as the main relationship of life and then you can develop adjunct relationships which can become intimate, but you always need that background “love/independence” or else you will inevitably become clingy, needy, and selfish in relationships.
I think I feel it’s normal and human to have desires and “selfishness” in relationships to some extent but I feel you on the selfless form of love - “I legitimately want the best for you” - I think both are healthy and natural and probably should exist together. I don’t think it’s bad to want someone if there is respect and legitimate desire for them to be happy not just you. It’s a give and take.
But idk it’s confusing and I often change my thinking on this stuff..
The videos where you just kind of ramble on about "deep" topics or tell stories about your past are your best and most interesting vids in my opinion
I definitely feel the same way as you, that my personality wouldn't allow me to stay committed to one person for the rest of my life. But I also think that you go into a relationship to grow and to give. And if you're able to continue growing with a person, then there will never be a reason to break it off. That's not the case with all relationships, and there's nothing that can be done about it when the relationship has run its course. Its selfish to stay with someone if this is the case (even if you've been married for a long time).
Andrew!!!!! I don't know if you are going to spend the rest of your life sing;e BUT I do know that right now I can totally relate to you and I am totally grateful for you sharing your experience of life with us! I just felt this had to be said! In the meantime CHEERS, go on dates and drink!!
Hey Andrew. We're close in age ( I'll be 27 this month) I think your definition of love is pretty on point. I met my now wife 4 years ago and we've been married for alittle over 2 years. We share in the raising of her daughter (13). Love is a desire for a life long companion. Someone who shares similar interests & is open & honest above all else. We were friends for about a year before it became romantic. Shortly thereafter we both knew that we had found that in one another. Nothing to be forced. Just take life as it comes. Keep yourself open to new experiences & don't be afraid of being hurt. ~wish you happiness mate
I am one of your subscribers who actually is in a relationship. It's been almost 6 years since we're together. I would like to share my idea of love with you, as you asked for. I do not usually want to share my thoughts in public like this, but I feel like I want to do so now because it's the least I can do for you since you made me laugh so many times. I enjoy your videos and I’d like to see them coming, regardless of their nature. I don’t care if it’s about pranks, or if it’s about talking or what not (I prefer the talking ones though). I hope you will find useful things in what I’m about to say.
You said that all these romantic movies and what not tend to distort what love is and I agree with that. I do so because we grow up with all these images of what love is that it becomes so hard to think about it yourself. You get stuck with some fantasies and fairy tales that you come across and you take it as it is presented to you. Well… I always analyse what I hear and wonder if it really applies for me, if it really it logical for me. This is how, at one point, I asked myself „what is love actually?” Because, as you said…is it something that once I possess, everything else in life becomes easy and amazing? Well, I saw for myself that all these images about love didn’t work. There was always one point in which the way I loved didn’t fit the description. I won’t bother you now with all the chain of questions and answers that I went through to get to what I think now, but I will share the main ideas. For me, unconditional love is the only form of love that exists. This sounds like the clichéd quotes online, but… what I’m trying to say is that once you have a reason behind it, it isn’t actual love anymore. I cannot say about a girl (for instance) that I love her because she is hot. I cannot say that I love her because of the way she does something for me. I asked myself what would happen when/if she wouldn’t be hot anymore, if she would stop doing the things that I was loving her for. Then my expectations would not be satisfied anymore and I would stop loving her? Because I would be kind of not interested anymore if she wouldn’t. Well how does this fit the description of love, the greatest feeling of them all? That was supposed to be so unbelievable hard to get rid of. The explanation for this was that the feeling that I thought was love in those situations wasn’t actually love. It does not make sense for love to depend on the benefits that a relationship brings. I came to think that love is something that I unconditionally share with everybody until they give me a good reason not to. And for me, those reasons are mainly referring to people that have no respect for others and couldn’t care less about how their choices in life will affect other lives. Apart from that, I truly believe that love is what I equally feel towards everyone. I think this is what binds us humans and creates the need of not being alone. You might ask yourself now how does everything I’ve just said relates to the kind of love that you were talking about, which is being in love with someone as in having a relationship. Well, I had to say all that… otherwise my next idea would seem strange at first. I think that the level of bonding that you feel towards different people has nothing to do with love. I just consider that there are different levels of attraction that you feel, levels that are independent of the love I was talking about earlier. So, what establishes for me these different levels? Well, it’s related to what someone thinks. I repeat…what some thinks! Not what I interpret about what someone is doing, but the mentality behind what someone is doing. I am a strong believer in the fact that being subjective changes reality. Once you involve your opinions and your feelings into something, it becomes personal and reality changes as well. As an example, it is true and real that that sometimes it rains? Well, of course… But what if I take it further and say that I do not like rain? Is it undeniably true that rain is bad and we should not enjoy it? Well, no… and once I involve my opinion, the truth remains the same, it is just raining. How I feel about it may be true about what I feel, but it is not true about rain. And getting back now to the idea, the same thinking applies for people. I will never judge someone by what I interpret and what I feel about what they are doing, but by how they think and what leads them to the choices they make. The levels of attraction that I was talking about depend on how much of how they think is similar to what I think. Another thing that helps me a lot is to think that the less I expect from someone based on my subjective thinking, the more chances I have to get along just fine. We’re all different and I really get that. This is why I don’t want to have friends based on similar life styles, based on family, or based on similar hobbies. The only dependent I have here is how they think. Not the colour of their eyes, not the colour of their skin, not what they have or anything as such. Just what they think. Again, based on the thinking similarities I will choose to whom I speak with, who I want as friends, as close friends and, at the top of this list, as my dearest and closest friend who you might call „ girlfriend”. That would be someone who I get along with so well just because we think the same way about important things in life. It would be someone who has the freedom to do whatever they desire and that desire includes being besides me, because we can relate to each other so well. Not to have any expectations, but to accept everything I do because they understand that I have to do what I have to do in order to be happy. And I’m not talking about someone who thinks and feels and does everything that way I do. But the few things that help two people stay together and have trust, such as communication, honesty, attachment, loyalty, thoughts about what living together means. I am not saying that we should both play volleyball because I would like my girlfriend to play too. Well, this relates back to what I said about expectations and the less I have to easier it gets to connect with someone. The point was that being in love for me is the feeling I have towards such a person. And I’m saying this because I felt it and I am still feeling it towards my girlfriend. I know it can be difficult to meet such a person and it takes a lot of time. To have an idea, I’m 23 years old now and we’ve been together for almost 6 years. This means that we were together since we were teenagers, which is the period of life in which you start thinking about life… Maybe this is why we get along so well, because we grew up thinking together. Anyhow, it is possible. But you see, the thing is that I do not feel that I must have this closest friend besides me. I do not think that I cannot live without someone like that and you said something similar in the video if I remember well. Well, I do say that being attracted to someone the way I am to her might be of great help when it comes to being happy, but I can only say this applies for me. Being happy has less to do with achievements or people besides you than it has to do with the way you think. Because I choose what to feel about something that happens.
So getting to your thoughts about falling in and out of love and how you would know if you’re supposed to put in the effort or just let it go… Well, based on the way I think it’s fairly easy to know what I should do. I think that change is the only thing that never changes. This is why I will accept any change in life, even if it means changing the way someone thinks. If that someone is my girlfriend and she decides that her life should be different, I will not oppose. I will not force anything with people. I am not supposed to work on someone else’s happiness. Happiness is something that we are responsible for ourselves. It does not depend on what my girlfriend/wife does. I do not intend to make someone feel like they should do something they do not wish to do just to make me happy. That is not freedom and not being free will get to you at one point. This is why I believe that marriages fall apart. Because people rush into things anyway and do not think if they should really end up marrying someone or not. The way I think will always help me know if I want to have someone besides me or not and also why! Being open minded and understanding `different` and `change` will always help me decide if something is worth fighting for or not.
Love is wanting to spend time with them and giving what you have to make them happy. Love is happiness
Well I could be wrong, but I believe "love" is a large, large wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.
this video came at the perfect time andrew! I feel defeated by luv again and watching this video made me happy
I think love, at its best, stems from friendship. 2 people alike, that motivate each-other to experience our full potential.
"It's only awkward if you make it awkward" best advice I've ever received and it was a friend in middle school
love is when u think of them subconsciously, you imagine them in your thoughts, you care for them, you dont expect care in return, though its great to have it back. When you love, it has to be unconditional, and whoever it is that you love, occupies a great deal of space in ur mind and heart... you might have "whoops" moments here and there, but at the end of the day, its just that one person..
Love to me is what you said, this unconditional need to give plus taking out the edge when you argue bc chances are you two gonna have a lifetime of arguing ahead of you down the road and being willing to crack jokes and go along with it when your partner does it to break the tension either halfway through or after a fight
'love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own'
Andrew this video was dope. It was like meditation for my self. I reflected on everything u said and compared it to my own life. The vibes were so chill too. Please make more of these
Stay with them if there is still reciprocity. That is always key to knowing they still care even in hard times.
I feel you on deep level man.. I feel like we have a lot of the same personality traits and life experiences. I'm 22 and never really been in a real relationship only flings with girls here and there. I've had opportunities to get into relationships in the past and backed out due to commitment issues or just not knowing how to be in a relationship. Sometimes I wish I had gone through with it so I could have gained the experience. Been feeling lonely as fuck more recently and wondering if i'll ever find a girl i'll actually feel like putting in the effort with but trying to stay positive and put myself out there more. Best of luck to you on your journey.
I think being in love means knowing others flaws in detail and still wanting to be with that person and work together thought each others problems. When your attachment to that person is stronger than any hardship then that's how you know you should stay and fight through problems
Good to see how raw and real you are Andrew. You're only 27 and it seems silly to think you'll be single forever. You're so damn likable the idea you'll never find someone for you is honestly nonsense.
Best of luck my friend
Your talks are deep & meaningful to me! Thanks bro! I am in a 4 year relationship & just recently moved across the country because our relationship was taking a mental toll & effecting my happiness. Dont get me wrong I fucking love this girl but sometimes I guess I can make her crazy. Like reallly crazy where I literally have no idea what to say to calm her down & it always seems to stem from something wrong with me. Like if im not in the mood to talk ,My "Vibes", or maybe our past. Mind you I met her when I was 16 and she was 23. So im 20 now and I made this huge decision for our happiness and Im stuck between "Stick it thru" and maybe we both grow enough or Just break up with the first girl that showed me true love. I honestley am sick of being someones "Drug" because I really dictate how shes feeling and its waaaay too much for me to handle.
You are worth something way more than being a scapegoat for someone else's internal issues.
I'm lonely 😂 but I love hearing what you have to say it makes me think
I relate to everything you said very strongly
Love your videos and vlogs especially
Well I was going to share but now I'm like what's the point
I think it's a great thing to be able to date early and multiple people so you can learn and have experience with it
His footsteps at 3:40 reminded me of the Minecraft walking sound lol
Spot on Andrew. Spot on.
Love is one of the few things you can't define because everyone has their own opinions and everyone will disagree with almost everyone else on some level. I guess I'd say it's when you have someone that you know can't save you or make your life perfect but you still feel completely at ease and yourself around them and feel like they care about and make you better just as much as you do for them
Your latest prank gone viral dude , congratulations !!! (though it was expected)
I think love is when u both want to make each other happy as u said and u enjoy each other's presence. I think that's the main thing is that u enjoy each other's company and u have an emotional connection. And u understand each other
The face you made when you started talking about the starbucks date hahaha
I think love is just willing to share a part of yourself with another person, whatever that may be, but not depend on them for your own happiness, it's like a friend, you don't solely rely on a friend for happiness, a friend simply is there and helps when you need it, I think that's love.
Damn really liked this vlog and it got me thinking
i watch your videos when im depressed which had ben about 3 months ongoing now cause me and my girlfriend have been going through it and today we broke up and lofe seems pointless but when i watch your vids it seems ok, youre my only friend Andrew so thank you, even though these videos are old I love you
Hey Andrew, my thoughts on this situation are also muffled at this time. Currently in a almost 5 year relationship which has been strong and well. Now I am 22 and I'm currently thinking about different lifestyles and experiencing a new adventure. This being my first relationship and not have been with any other women, I feel confused as to if i'm making the right decision with leaving or if i'm making a big mistake. I am comfortable and happy with where I am, but i also want to experience different types of love and affection.
Over the past few years I have contemplated this decision and I always turned it down, I think because I am scared of going on my own. It is a tough situation to handle and I hope I end up making the right decision.
Hope this gets read :)
Very interesting thoughts!
I feel like love is going through the tough times and never giving up and growing with a person and not regretting any of it, if that makes sense. Been in a very happy relationship for almost 2 years.
4:00 wholeheartedly agree.
I think early in on a relationship it's important to resist the urge to put in work, you need to be who you are comfortable being day by day because that's who you are comfortable being in the long run and she might fall in love with the guy who is putting in work and that might not be who you are, so early on in a relationship try not to change yourself or your actions very much because that energy and excitement won't last forever and when it's gone there's a good chance the relationship might collapse. Also you had a thought about, "can I do better?" you shouldn't date a girl at all if you think you can do better. Ideally it shouldn't even be something you think about but I can understand the thought and concern.
Love is recreating all your old videos every time you meet someone you want in your life
If you're having doubts about staying with someone, you shouldn't be with them.
@lahwf To answer your question, I think it's caring more for someone else's well being than your own, then acting accordingly. regardless of how it effects you
Love is meaning to living the grind when dreams and hopes fade.
i am beginning my first relationship at the moment. my idea of love is what my parents have. it's like at the end of the day, even though they bicker and fight, they love each other even after 27 years and getting married after 10 days of knowing each other. it's a lot of compromising and selflessness for sure. also just loving and appreciating the other person for who they are. idk i'm only 19 going on 20, and my girl and i are just kids having fun. when falling out of love, i think it's worth reconciling or whatever if you know it's worth it to you. if the other person doesn't think so or try, then it's time to move on.
Wow just watching this opened my mind on how crazy humans r in a good way we constantly think about deep thoughts and ask a lot of questions the human brain is so magnificent
Love the real talk
Andrew, you should read Neil Strauss' 'The Truth'. It deals with fear of commitment and whether monogamy is natural and basically all of what you've said in the video. Was really mind-opening for me
Love is the increase in dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin. These are the same chemicals that prescription drugs increase to battle anxiety, depression, bipolar, and other mental health
Something like that
Rly tho Honeymoon phase is big good feels time
Imagine everyone just loved each other smh
I was in love for about a year and half with this girl. After that much time it starts to become work to keep everything going. I was willing to put the work in and keep it going. I guess she wasn't. Different factors in the relationship probably caused her to lose her grip on it. She ended it with me and was devastated. Still getting through it actually. Love is when you give your everything to someone but you have to be careful that they do the same in return.
Damn, miss this content. Greetz from Germany.
Hey andrew I've been having a lot of anxiety lately and your vlogs are always so calming and you're funny as shit. Also i have the same issues on love as you... Commitment issues lmao, very fun. #keepitupDad
My idea of love is not being attached to the outcome of the relationship, yet always respecting the other person as I would expect to be respected.