Pros & Cons of LIVING WITH YOUR PARENTS in your late 30's
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- čas přidán 30. 06. 2024
- I never expected to still be living with my parents yet here we are! I have to admit although it's something I never planned there are Pros and Cons to this dynamic!
Pros
1. It’s not a BIG Deal in the Bahamas
2. I get to SAVE money
3. My parents are supportive
4. Quality time with my Parents
5. The covering of a Protector and Provider
Cons
1. I battle with feeling like a failure
2. I take on childlike behaviors
3. I want to entertain in MY OWN HOME
4. Me Time
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Let me know in the comment section ? What are the Pros and Cons of Living at Home with your parents?
Pros is that I can see my mom on the daily. We laugh. Talk. Reminisce. These r the moments that matter. I don't want to look back and realize I could have spent alot of time spending quality time with my folks.
Cons is ahhh when i maybe want a date. 🤣🤣🤣❤️❤️❤️❤️or as Blanche says a "gentleman caller‼️‼️
Your nbr 1 con is absolutely mine. As a grown man. I work. Full time job. Benefits. Car. But when I tell people that I immediately get the side eye. I'm like listen my mom is cool. We get along.
I love this video!! I feel so much better about living at home! This was God sent!
I’m 34, will be 35 in August and I’m still at home. I don’t mind it and don’t care what anyone says. I pay rent and help with utilities. My parents don’t bother me and I don’t bother them. I’m saving money and I’m able to go and do what I want when I want to. I don’t have a husband or kids, it’s just me. I don’t want to pay $1200-1600 for a one bedroom apartment & I don’t want to live in a house alone. Im going back to school in August and I have to go part time so I’m happy to be able to stay home in peace. Im happy to have parents that allow me to stay there, not everyone has that blessing.
have you thought about a roommate
@@shoo0c621 why would I move out with a stranger?
I’m the same! 34 living with mum, no kids… I hate society sometimes trying to tell me what to do 😢
Fuck the haters, you do you.
Girl I can’t put rent n toss it ! Now the rent so high no the only way it will make sense … if we buy or own home yes we buy it
As I age (close to 40), I realized it is best to make decision based on what works for you and not based on what other ppl think you should. Because people could judge same event differently depending on whom/when they make comment about it.
I am 32 , not married or have children and live at home with my mother . My mother is up in age and needs assistance. I am not where I want to be in life to live on my own . We help each other . She needs me and right now I need her. I am trying to finish my degree and I want to start my masters degree. I pray that God sends me a husband lol , but I want to be out of my childhood home before 35 .
Listen I know the feeling but yes God knows exactly what we need in each season ❤
You don't need a husband or kids to become an adult, so ridiculous
Same
If you're im your thirties and trying to finish your degree before having a man and starting a family, you'll be in your 40s by then, and it will be slim pickings by then. Stop wasting time.
God helps those who help themselves, try the apps you may find someone on there you never know. Keep high standards and know what you want. Good luck
I’m 31 and single with no kids.i still live with both my parents. I’m experiencing work burn out/severe anxiety/overall laziness and depression that I just quit my job and now I’m not even paying rent anymore.My parents are disappointed because I quit my job.Honestly I feel like a huge loser that needs to grow up.I don’t know what I’m going to do anymore.
Tomorrow it's my 38 birthday. I'm living on my own since I was 20. I'm really considering going back to live with my mom.
My landlord again wants to raise the rent I live in for 10 years and already I pay too much. Been moving so many appartments and lived in shitty places. I feel like a failure but I'm tired of chasing my own tail and not getting anywhere financially.
Thank you for the video
Listen for some reason I am excited about 38 and just got to half way through 37 but I don’t know I feel like there is something about 38! Praying the same for you too, I’m learning our lives we’re not meant to look identical, if you feel God is calling you to move back home, you never know why. I would say fast and pray on it and if you have the clearance be obedient! God has a purpose for every season even the harder ones. Thanks for watching and sharing!
What did you decide to do? I'm where you are?
@@Iamchristaelaine After seeing some places I've decided to saty where I am and not move because prices are high everywhere and it would be the cheapest to stay.
I didn't move back with my mom my mental health worth more than debt.
@@Kerelrazil I agree. I was definitely guided by God to move back home to reconcile the relationship with my Father. I am happy with homecookings and my Mom doing my laundry too lol. Its actually been great! I been living and going out more and when i lived alone I stood home and was so bored and lonely most of the time.
I’m moving from my dream home state of Florida to live with my dad in northern Indiana at 35. I’ll be working full time and working on starting a business. I decided to do this for the next year to year and a half to pay off debt and save cash. My ex-wife divorced me a couple years ago and took everything and I’m still recovering from that. I also incurred $15k in debt from unexpected car repairs and a hospital bill. It’s impossible for me to get ahead while paying $1,500/mo for a one bedroom
i’m currently thinking of moving back with my parent in my early 30’s so that i can save up some money
It’s a blessing to even have the option. That’s the pro!
I’m 33 and I have a one bedroom apartment but I’m waiting until my lease is up and imma move back in my parents house and stay rent free. So I can save up for my house and pay off my college debt
I know I’m late but I just turned 39 and I’m not married, no children and my beliefs are similar. I was living on my own until Covid turned everything upside down in 2020. It’s been 3 years and now I’m having the hardest time living at home because I sometimes feel like a kid still, eventhough I am grown. My parents are still married so I deal with two personalities all the time and I work from home. Just like you I pay rent and help monetarily around the house with other things because I definitely feel it’s fair. Way cheaper then doing it by myself. I’m now considering moving because I really need my own space and I work from home full-time so it’s becoming an issue. I’m trying to wait on God but the wait has been so long. Thank you for posting this because I don’t think many people understand and it’s so nice to find someone else in the same place. ❤
Number two in the "CONS" section is REAL! I am a 40 year old baby! My parents and even aunts still send me money randomly. I love it! I wouldn't change it for anything. I have a very supported tribe. I lived with my parents til I was 17, moved to NC, went to college, had a baby at 22, then moved back home. Stayed home til 29, moved out got married at 30, had another baby at 32. Separated from my husband, moved back home with my parents at 33 and was there til I was 36! There is nothing wrong with living with your parents. In my case, my parents helped me with my kids. My mummy cooked meals everyday and my daddy picked up the kids from school while I worked. While I lived with them, I paid the utilities because they had no mortgage. I think the only people who have something to say negative about it have bad relationships with their parents. I had friends and even cousins that envied me because I could always rely on my family. I can't help it that I'm the favorite! LOL!
lololol I love it! Nothing wrong with being the favorite it is beyond a blessing to have that support when life gets lifey
Yeees! I totally have a negative comment above, and it's def because I had a bad relationship with my mom. She was insane. I think that living with your parents is a neutral thing in itself... But for everyone it is not healthy. It can be terribly oppressive and toxic. Especially if ur parents are abusive. Alot of the time, they don't grow out of abusing u or develop respect for u as an individual. But if u have a loving relationship, I don't see a problem, so long as both parties are happy and healthy with the arrangement.
I'm from Sri Lanka (South Asian) and we have a similar cultural norm here too where it's not weird to live with your parents as adults either. It goes beyond the economic conveniences to live with them. Me being in my 30s, I do get into my head space a lot feeling like a failure to be living with the family so I hear you...there's pros and cons definitely.
I am Pakistani and it's the same
@alena7756 I know people from these cultures and it's often a dysfunctional nightmare having multiple generations living under one roof, especially in the West where there's a constant clash of values. Best advice is to move out and grow up.
I’m laid off from work and my lease is up in July. I’m really thinking about moving back home. This inflation is killing me.
I sold my condo and moved away and got home sick. Now rent and condos are so pricey I am just staying with my parents until I fully get back on my feet. I am 38yrs old and nice to see others doing the same! I might just stay until I meet Mr. Right lol
I am 40 gotta move back in... feel disappointed in myself but need to start over my apartment was Hella 2 years toxic. Wish me luck :( idk
Mine to I move back home to start over I don’t like it. But I say to my self I will get out the camp of parents
I see nothing wrong with living at home with your parents. The way I was raised was you don’t leave home until marriage. And some people are actually not ready to leave home when they think they are.
I'm 37 I've never left home unless when I was travelling and engaged I'd be gone six months abroad. But still in a family house lol. I've just recently graduated, single and unemployed. I'm African and my mums only child left since my brother passed last year.
When I was younger I never envisioned my life like this. Now I just want to be close to my mum but I also now feel trapped. That being said I do feel God has a plan and my mum is the sweetest and honesty wants the best for me but I have realised I've been spoiled and molly cuddled so I'm working on being more independent and getting out into the world. I really want to spoil her when I gain employment. I'm also very traditional and honestly desire to be a homemaker. I'm so grateful to have God and my mother but I do feel I need to be more independent. However she's my best friend and I'm all she has now and she's also retired so I just want to take care of her as much as possible.
You aren't all she has. At the end of the day, God is your mom's protector, friend, comforter, and confidante. God will take care of her even when you can't. Your mom won't live forever, neither will you. If God is calling you somewhere, don't resist it out of fear of your mom's loneliness or lack of help. God will provide for her everything she needs. Don't stop the pursuit of living because of fear.
You need to have your own life. Your parents had there's. If you don't move, you'll be a stunted adult.
The love you have for your mother is beautiful.
Thank you. I needed to see this, how a woman my age speaks about living with the parents and doesn't justify for doing so ❤ It's stupid to think that I am a failure because I don't spend 70% of my salary on a 35 sqm flat just to be like everyone else. I spend that money on my loved ones and to support my family. I'd love to live in separate apartment next door to have that me time or have the silence I need as an introvert. But there is nothing bad about being around your parents while they are still alive.
Everyone considering going home to save money..be.. go save your money.. be a grown kid and let your parents have their baby back.. you'll be so grateful you did
Lol I just turned 32 years old. I have a college degree and work full time but still live with my Mom. I really don’t know how I should make out of this. My Mom doesn’t seem bothered by it at all. I was contemplating of buying my own place but she told me what’s the point of buying a place when I will inherit one of her houses one day. I did read a lot of financial books that from an investment perspective home ownership can be a very expensive decision and can be burdensome.
I’m 29 and I always lived with my grandma who adopted me. For me even if we didn’t see eye to eye most times for me the Pro to this was being with her until her last days she just passed away in march so I got to enjoy her until God picked her up. Con would be I was sometimes treated as a child with her getting upset at me for chores she needed me to do her way even though I did chores my own way. Still I’m thankful to God for being able to be around her until her last days. Most times I did feel like a loser like there’s so many people my age who live on their own.half of me was thinking one day she will be gone and I don’t any any regrets on the time I couldn’t or wouldn’t spend with her. Now she’s gone and I feel like it’s a great time to not like with parents anymore even though she was the only parent I had left
Totally understand the point about when u live with your parents, u keep child-like qualities. This is something i observed about my mom that i resent. When i was around 7 years. My mom got pregnant by a married man. When this happened, she uprooted me and my big sis from our home which had been made in one state and moved back home to her mothers house. Within 2 years of living with my gram and papa, we moved into our own home 7 mins away. But even still my gram was a huge part of my life which i cherish. But in alot of ways, its like my gram became more of the mom and my mom was just not very maternal at all. For example, we went over my gramma's house virtually daily to eat. My mom hardly ever cooked for us. I resent this because i never got to see my mom actually take the responsibility of fully committing herself to being a mother. Even to this day, she wont move from that town though it hasn't been good to her. She keeps making the excuse of her mother is there, so she has to stay. I left at 17 and never been back. My mother is not in good mental or emotional state and its multiple reasons but this is one in my opinion. I feel that she stays stuck in a kid mentality of having to be told what to do instead of taking a stand for herself and it impacts her decision-making and ultimately her health and happiness.
Not saying this is your situation, it clearly doesn't sound that way. But just reiterating your point that being under your parents forever can stifle u in ways that rob you of fulfillment and happiness and productivity and confidence that comes from bein dependent on yourself.
You can stay with your parents as long as you have a job. Because living with them without it is terrible. It’s frustrating, you experience judgment, humiliation and they treat you like a child. I’m suffering so much because at the age of 33 I have no job, I’m still finishing university, no friends and no boyfriend. I’m in pain almost every single day but I have faith in God. I hope that one day everything will be fine also for me :(
I was in a situation like yours in my early 30s. No regular job, no money and parents even called cops on me many times because the viewed me as “a bug” or a “mosquito” you can find a good job if you don’t give up. I did. Managed to pay all my debts too. Now I’m looking at apartments and planning to leave for sure in a near future
@@laurab9518 I’m so happy for you and wish you all the best ❤
It's weird because most of my friends that don't live with their parents, have been handed apartments to live by their parents, so they only have to worry about making some money to pay for food and bills. And the rest of friends that don't live with their parents have coupled and they support themselves as a team, or they find support on both families from both sides. I have only one friend that actually works and pays for all his rent and all, but he got lucky and got into a friend's company that gave him a very fine job selling coffee. It's all weird, most of them have inherited apartments, cars or even jobs. I'm 37, I'm a musician and have always struggled with money, I've been independent for 10 years now, renting places to live and paying all my bills and food. My parents didn't give me anything, which is weird because my parents did inherit an apartment and a car when they got married in the 70s. Ah, what a hell.
I am so grateful that I am not alone 🦋 I love living with my parents. I’d prefer a greater house that could afford the growth of my children as well and I wished my mother had boundaries on who she allowed to live with her and who she didn’t. Other than that; I could be good if you need it to be good 🦋
I love your self awareness! It’s such a super hero strength and it was a joy listening to your story, thanks for sharing 😊
I’m moving back home to save money and to build my credit score up so me and my daughter can live in a better environment. Moving back home is going to be a burden lifted off my shoulders
God has blessed me since I moved back in 8 years ago, I have been blessed with a nice job 3 years ago where I can afford $3500 rent in California comfortably. But after living here and help pay for bills. I'm ok with staying. My children have a room and so do I and I can pay $1300 to rent and be ok. Travel with my children and saving for retirement. It is a win-win for everyone. I have both Mom and Dad. I love it.
I love this! Keep living with them for as long as you can ❤
I lived with my parents for 3 years after moving back home, bought a condo moved out for 2/3 years then moved back home due to the pandemic and my condo not being conducive for my puppy. I put my condo on rent and have the help I need from them not to mention I spent several months of this year dealing with medical issues. I couldn't do it without them 😁
Seee God knows, He aligns is so well, When we don’t even know it!
super helpful and informative video! and thank you for saying that about taking on childlike behaviors- i paused the video, ran downstairs, and took care of the kitchen.
31 years old and living with my parents since I was born😅. I have had only a job in my life of two months which allowed me to save money for travel. Moving soon and excited for it, want to do it, get married one day and have my own home
I lived with family for a long time up until I was 30. I miss it in some ways but now I'm 33 it's not possible anymore
Moved back with my parents to save a clean $50k for the year.
I’ve been renting for almost 10 years. I’m over it. I’m ready for ownership.
So saving money back home so within year 1 or 2 I can purchase a condo.
50K is a lovely downpayment depending where you live.
Definitely related to this! Thought it was just me thinking like that in regards to me time 😅
I am the same!!!
I’m 28 and moved out… it’s been 4 months and I’m considering moving back … I feel so happy when I go visit home- I feel sad having to leave 🥹 I have reales benefits of living alone such as peace and quiet/ privacy and my own space but that’s literally IT. I haven’t had any friends over, I’m older now so I haven’t had any guys over like I probably would have in my early 20’s… the only thing I’ve been able to do is that I couldn’t do there is foster kittens and dogs.. and I don’t even want to do that anymore LOL I’ll probably be home very soon. This video made me feel better, there’s just so many mixed opinions on my mind about it
Me and my mom's live together. My dad passed away then my grandmother got sick. She soon passed there after. Now my grandfather is sick. So being close to my family is most important to me. I stayed in another state for some time but i ended up being on the road every weekend to come home. So I decided to move in with my mom. Split the bills. And I'm good.
Thank you for your video! And you are not loser if you live with your parents but in contrary you are very rational person who can have rational spends of money. Good luck to you! 😝👪😜
I live with my parents because I mutually pay for mortgage but I love my them so much and I want to be with them and support them for their last days, I feel shameful about my situation but I don't feel like I should have to.
I hope my kids would live at home if they are still in the same state as us. They’ll pay rent, BUT my plan is to save it so they can have even more of a down payment for their first home. Prayerfully, there’s a basement or FROG in the house so they can still feel like they live independent. Annnnd married almost 9yrs andI require daily me time, even if that’s just 20-30mins. However, hubby & I also have mastered the art of being alone together, might be touching in one or another but we’re both engrossed for a time in whatever we want and not conversing, & he knows when I’m talking to myself vs him 😂😂😂
I love thissss thanks so much for sharing the realities of Me time lol and that having your children home until their ready is also a way of helping to create generational wealth instead of spending it on rent so society can say you are now an “adult”
Exactly …. My friends live at home
You are so beautiful kerel pinder 😍I love you smile and personality 🥰feels so good to connect with you.sending luv from Nigeria ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Awww thanks! Happy to connect with you too!
Awww thanks! Happy to connect with you too!
@@Kerelrazil we are now family ❤️❤️
This only works of your parents like and respect you.
This is necessary in today’s economy
Now living with your parents at 30 and beyond is trendy 😅
Can you do a skincare routine please? We need to know
I’ve been struggling to be at peace with this … I’m 30, finally graduated - started my masters, got a great paying job but the market in my area is RIDICULOUS. But here’s the thing - my partner of over 4 years doesn’t seem to care about us living together because he rents his own overpriced apartment. Idk-I’ve been in my feels about this stuff lately
I like it
Exactly thanks … I live at home at 30 going on 31 I just cannot financially sustain myself ….
Everyone has a different experience and story. No criticism from me. Late 30s living with family as well. Looking for a good woman to start a family with and lives to build together.
You're beautiful! ❤️
That’s my worst nightmare 😅
I'm 36 years OLD STILL LIVES WITH MY PARENTS AND IN A 4 RELATIONSHIP RECENTLY loss my baby October 10/11/22 so don't nobody has room to laugh and picking because working and saving money helped
There’s lot woman w kids who live at home too remmeber that and the grandparent shelling because there’s a dusty dad or dads . We r single and I don’t pay rent because my parents home paid off they just want me to have for me I do buy grocery or what ever my mom ask for but that’s sll
Your problems isn't that you live alone, the problem is you need a life partner
Sounds like that's what she's waiting for.
but its not always easy. everything doesn't work out like that way
❤❤❤❤
What 20 ,30 , 40 age enjoyed your and be happy 😊👍
SoOo related to this ,,,
I’m 39 years old and single parent I got job I’m still living with parent most money go into my son so my parent help out and cheaper
If anyone is against people depending on their parents , here's a tip...Dont take out student loans.
Im 37..i bought my own home 2 years ago and wasnt doing well living alone...im gay in a small town and meeting a partner is not an option so i moved back in with my parents after 2 yrs...i hate them more than ever and they hate me too...i am lookin forward to getting the fuck out of here
Well I’ll give my two cents from a guy, “man’s” perspective…firstly, if you have a job and feel financially stable enough, you tend to want to become independent and want to ‘spread your chest’ and move into your own space. As for a woman, especially living with both parents, I can see why they would not just prefer, but they would tend to stay at home longer because of a sense of security.🤷🏿♂️
Good point so you think even in the Caribbean men more so should seek that independence. Yes one of the things is the security aspect as a woman, hence the covering point under Pro’s
@@Kerelrazil yes, specifically Caribbean men who’s ancestors were mostly farmers and blue collar men. With that being said, we feel inclined to be independent and take care/provide/protect our women and family.
I’m a woman and I love my independence. I’m absolute miserable living with my parents. I love them but I need my freedom back
Im trying to get my boyfriend to move back with me 😭🤣🤷♀️. I'm like you know how much money we will save rent is between $1700-1900 for a good 1 bedroom. I'm like this sounds like a great plan and he don't want to do it like be smart now so we don't suffer in the future.
If their normal people then this is OK mine are nuts 😂
Remmeber guys our parents r getting f older this is it once we leave we most likely will have our own home our own family husband kids some day our parents are in 50-60s now if we are 30-40 at home is true is different living home now … Right gurl most immigrant families or kids w immigrant parents get it
I’m here not married no kids and I was able to save rebuild credit and our home paid off I do whatever I want t ohhhh see im Asian my parents want me here just like you ur not married me neither… kids w immigrant parents will get it my brothers stayed til they bought homes right before pandemic before 30 and not it’s so bad. See! I did same thing thinking I’d find someone to buy a home n settle w etc but they r broke lazy I realize I gotta get the house my self I’m ready credit wise have my small business I’m good but now I’m freezing my eggs I’m 37 I just don’t trust men to even do 50/50 and 50:50 means u still need them or they need u. I never wanna be stuck on a relationship I never was I would just leave
There is a lot mental problems today, people who can't handle a job or social interactions.
I don't recommend therapy or pharmas.
You need atencion, thats it.
This is terrible. What about the parents? Do they really WANT to subsidize their adult kids indefinitely? Do they ever want to reclaim their privacy? She needs to move out.
Agreed; we now have a generation of mooches whose entire life plan is waiting for their parents to die so they can reap some imagined financial windfall.
Caribbean parents will allow their child to live at home up until marriage. It's not a big deal!
@@AmillionRays except...people aren't getting married, at least not in significant enough numbers.