This Christian Batman Knockoff is Worse than You Think.

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  • čas pƙidĂĄn 5. 05. 2023
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    đŸŽ” Bibleman, Bibleman.
    Does what ever a Bible can.
    Get his power from his savior!
    Cuts off heads with his lightsaber.
    Look out!
    ...He'll ice you with his GL*CK! đŸŽ”
    Music:
    Lord of the Land - Kevin Macleod
    also maybe Star Wars
    Written and Directed by:
    Frank St. John
    Michael Romaniello
    Cinematography and SFX by:
    Mitchell Nance
    #bibleman #comedy #lightsaber
  • Komedie

Komentáƙe • 1,4K

  • @Wizards_with_Guns
    @Wizards_with_Guns  Pƙed rokem +1548

    What do you think the name of the NEXT Captain Bible episode should be?

    • @dawsonberardi973
      @dawsonberardi973 Pƙed rokem +211

      Captain Bibe Vs Gay Thoughts

    • @RamenDenominator
      @RamenDenominator Pƙed rokem +75

      Dungeons & Damnation: Captain Bible vs. The Dungeon Mastur

    • @tomergngn
      @tomergngn Pƙed rokem +42

      1. A prequel about John Bible. Why he came to hating god, what drove him to drugs, and much more. His last name is Bible so he must've come from a religious family, meaning he was a rebellious child that left religion. He screamed and moved fluently at the start, yet at the present his movements are all janky and he acts sociopathically towards others (almost exploded a kid just because why not). It means that throughout his superhero life, he grew more sociopathic and uncaring about others. From the end, we can see that he stabs the deceptor because he shot his bible, meaning that he prioritizes god before people's lives - a good reason for a sociopathic person.
      2. Maybe let him see other religions? Not once in this episode another religion was mentioned. There were only two options - you either believe in Jesus or "not". How will he react to Jews for example? They believe Jesus exists yet they don't believe he's a god of some sort.
      3. Maybe a sequel of him learning that killing innocent people is also against the bible? If we recite the 6th commandment, "Thou shalt not kill". Maybe he'll realize he was the greatest sinner of all, and try to be a superhero while trying desperately not to kill with his guns?
      He's a great superhero overall, and based on tiny clues from the video I was able to learn a lot about him. He's a sociopathic false-believer that justifies his actions with the holy bible. You can really expand that twisted thinking into a whole couple of episodes comically emphasizing how weird that logic is.

    • @AdAstraCompany
      @AdAstraCompany Pƙed rokem +15

      The Dark Night: Captain Bible vs. Sandman

    • @someguywithaphone5921
      @someguywithaphone5921 Pƙed rokem +11

      Captain Bible II: Gideon's Quest for King James's Gold, Frankensence, and Murr. (as told by Matthew, Mark, Luke, and Jim) (with special guest, the Holy Ghost of Kurt Kobain. Get it? Holy, because, well, you know, very quick-onset lead poisoning.)

  • @Joel-Haver
    @Joel-Haver Pƙed rokem +4534

    Perfectly reasonable reaction to someone shooting your face Bible

    • @ProffessorYellow
      @ProffessorYellow Pƙed rokem +47

      Everytime Joel, everytime.

    • @Me-wx1mt
      @Me-wx1mt Pƙed rokem +43

      exactly! If it was like, his arm bible or something, might've been a bit of an overreaction

    • @IMPATIENTCLO
      @IMPATIENTCLO Pƙed rokem +5

      I just knew you would be here for some reason

    • @milktenders6219
      @milktenders6219 Pƙed rokem +4

      You’re right, he deserved it for besmirching the light of the lord

    • @SwiftNimblefoot
      @SwiftNimblefoot Pƙed rokem +4

      Y'd have thought he would try and shoot him in the only unarmored part of his body, the face.

  • @graysonsewell652
    @graysonsewell652 Pƙed rokem +2351

    The Bible man cosplay has no right being this good.

    • @panther1911
      @panther1911 Pƙed rokem +15

      Hahaha

    • @Zharan_Keating
      @Zharan_Keating Pƙed rokem +69

      Kinda crazy he got the intro literally perfect too lol.

    • @ERROR-uk9uc
      @ERROR-uk9uc Pƙed rokem +46

      Bro it is great to know someone else know bible man

    • @Zharan_Keating
      @Zharan_Keating Pƙed rokem +9

      @@ERROR-uk9uc frfr its so chaotic

    • @piercewilson4029
      @piercewilson4029 Pƙed 11 měsĂ­ci +11

      Bible Man was my fav show from ages 4-6 so im all for this content

  • @dxaviorsith5603
    @dxaviorsith5603 Pƙed rokem +2675

    the way he checked the trash cans and shot inside them was lowkey terrifying

    • @3dgyt33n3
      @3dgyt33n3 Pƙed rokem +94

      And he was proven right in the end!!!

    • @ArcYT
      @ArcYT Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +52

      The Christian Punisher

    • @rhabeldibabeldi6812
      @rhabeldibabeldi6812 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +48

      He only shot them so they couldnt attack him, which was the right thing to do as you may have noticed

    • @JOfJaZ
      @JOfJaZ Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +67

      He didn’t even check them. He opened it and shot THEN checked after.

    • @slycoopracoon2478
      @slycoopracoon2478 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +69

      The "plant the claymore at every entrance so they can't escape" line was the darkest shit I've ever heard lmao

  • @TheCheaterFromBibleman
    @TheCheaterFromBibleman Pƙed 10 měsĂ­ci +860

    I love this. Fun fact, the actual Bibleman would often misquote scripture in his episodes.

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      Actually?
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

    • @Kristopian
      @Kristopian Pƙed 7 měsĂ­ci +14

      Yeah :P

    • @thecianinator
      @thecianinator Pƙed 6 měsĂ­ci +50

      Were they using some specific version of the Bible, or just messing up?

    • @nicholas-dv1mg
      @nicholas-dv1mg Pƙed 5 měsĂ­ci +41

      i had to read that 3 times before i noticed you said misquote instead mosquito, after what i just watched, it wouldn't have been too crazy.

    • @chinsaw2727
      @chinsaw2727 Pƙed 4 měsĂ­ci +37

      @@nicholas-dv1mg
      Fun fact: 8 hours of sleep helps with reading comprehension

  • @flippnfadoodle13
    @flippnfadoodle13 Pƙed rokem +2673

    "Deceptor, I knew I'd find you alone with a kid" Only 30 seconds in and im dying already

    • @goawayihavecommentstomake1488
      @goawayihavecommentstomake1488 Pƙed rokem +88

      I thought he was dressed up as “the Fiddler/Diddler” too, so that made sense lol

    • @meshavillar
      @meshavillar Pƙed rokem +49

      That part made me laugh, also "eating drugs" at the beginning 😂

    • @THE-ERADICATOR
      @THE-ERADICATOR Pƙed rokem +7

      Brilliance!

    • @Kohl293
      @Kohl293 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +6

      You’re not the only one

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      Insert bass boosted vine boom here
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @nicholasmartin534
    @nicholasmartin534 Pƙed rokem +1939

    I thought this was going to be a real commentary on the “Bible Man” show, and was totally buying it the whole time. You can imagine my shock when he pulled out a gun and they began swearing.

    • @Shod_inSilence
      @Shod_inSilence Pƙed 10 měsĂ­ci +18

      Saaaame.

    • @JohnWilliams-wl9px
      @JohnWilliams-wl9px Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +63

      Given the fact they glitched out the part logo and audio saying Captain Bible in the beginning, odds are they wanted the audience to think that

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      Had me in the first half, not gonna lie
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

    • @Alrift
      @Alrift Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci +3

      literally me

    • @playgirlmagazine
      @playgirlmagazine Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci +9

      So did I. I was doom scrolling and saw this. It was my first video of their's. Now I can't stop.

  • @nobody2996
    @nobody2996 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +286

    "Gay wizard!" "No, I'm the wizard of stealing!"
    Hey, it's an easy mistake to make. The same two dudes played like every villain/minion on the show!

  • @leersay
    @leersay Pƙed rokem +745

    “Don’t judge me, Jesus drank wine too” is such an unbelievably funny line I came

  • @Gormfeld
    @Gormfeld Pƙed rokem +393

    I like how they just took an ordinary episode of Bibleman and added guns to it.

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      “So anyways, I started blasting”
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @misterpancakes
    @misterpancakes Pƙed rokem +1136

    The whole PSA/kid actor holding a cigarette/joint in unnatural ways is the key detail to these kinds of things 😂

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      Oh my
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @ashwhiteforest9078
    @ashwhiteforest9078 Pƙed rokem +1050

    "John Bible hated God and loved eating drugs." He's literally me, guys.

    • @BeltFedSelfDefense
      @BeltFedSelfDefense Pƙed rokem +2

      Oof

    • @reignbalboa
      @reignbalboa Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +19

      Why do you hate God?

    • @Darth_Bateman
      @Darth_Bateman Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +64

      I don’t think John Bible stopped eating drugs.

    • @TheRealZombieWizard
      @TheRealZombieWizard Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +63

      @@reignbalboa Probably took his lunch money and beat him up, you know God he works in mysterious ways.

    • @dantemoose420
      @dantemoose420 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +18

      ​@@reignbalboahow could you not, considering everything He's responsible for?

  • @nathanielreichley4640
    @nathanielreichley4640 Pƙed rokem +801

    The jokes are great and all but that costume is so well constructed! Great job gang

    • @Tigatron1448
      @Tigatron1448 Pƙed rokem +18

      Lol right? The production on this was sick.

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      No cap on Darwin frfr
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

    • @davenotstaine5646
      @davenotstaine5646 Pƙed měsĂ­cem

      I would’ve gotten away with it too

  • @kidchiko9435
    @kidchiko9435 Pƙed rokem +481

    Bible blocks the bullet
    The Fibber: that would have been the perfect time to say "the armor of God"

    • @clean_nutzzgaming5290
      @clean_nutzzgaming5290 Pƙed 11 měsĂ­ci +13

      THE FIBBER!! 😂😂😂

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      THE FIBBER!! 😂😂😂
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @theogandyrew
    @theogandyrew Pƙed rokem +525

    "Consult the book of armaments!" -Captain Bible

    • @someguywithaphone5921
      @someguywithaphone5921 Pƙed rokem +13

      Where even is Antioch anyway. Under the rabbit? Oh, it IS the rabbit.

    • @MrBigCookieCrumble
      @MrBigCookieCrumble Pƙed rokem +16

      And thou shalt count to 3, and the number of the counting shall be 3!

    • @SwiftNimblefoot
      @SwiftNimblefoot Pƙed rokem +8

      Methinks this guy follows the God-Emperor of the Imperium of Men, not Jesus...

    • @birbfromnotcanada
      @birbfromnotcanada Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +1

      “Kill commies they bad”
      Armalite 2:23

    • @christophersanders3252
      @christophersanders3252 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +5

      @@MrBigCookieCrumble 5 Is right out!

  • @moonlitmortician6694
    @moonlitmortician6694 Pƙed rokem +51

    I like to imagine his body armor is just fifty Bibles all stapled together.

  • @Nintokis
    @Nintokis Pƙed rokem +112

    As someone who's watched several Bibleman VHS' as a kid, I gotta say this is more accurate to the source material than anyone would expect.

  • @LikeAFoxStudios
    @LikeAFoxStudios Pƙed rokem +1255

    This shouldn’t be possible, but you have once again topped yourselves, and made the greatest sketch on this website.

    • @genevievedisemelo5584
      @genevievedisemelo5584 Pƙed rokem +26

      i totally agree, topping yourself shouldn't be possible!

    • @gsleazy1975
      @gsleazy1975 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci

      One word: A M E N

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      Key & peele: AT LAST, A WORTHY OPPONENT! OUR BATTLE WILL BE LEGENDARY
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @noahbruington2542
    @noahbruington2542 Pƙed rokem +603

    This is so accurate to source material it hurts. You guys never miss lmao

  • @corey123897
    @corey123897 Pƙed rokem +114

    1:18 I love how the kid in the background is trying so hard to hold back his laughter while being pretending to be absolutely horrified 😂

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      Good attention to detail, my friend
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @carpeimodiem
    @carpeimodiem Pƙed rokem +87

    "Phillipino 4:12" is perhaps the greatest moment in cinema đŸ€Ł

  • @garrethatch5362
    @garrethatch5362 Pƙed rokem +305

    God I remember watching Bibleman when I was a kid, the VHS is probably still in my parents basement somewhere

    • @SoRaKe254
      @SoRaKe254 Pƙed rokem +6

      remember unice is javis and lucy was ultron

    • @samhodge7460
      @samhodge7460 Pƙed rokem +9

      My dad made my brother and I sit through the whole thing when we were kids. It definitely had its moments.

    • @penguinsrbirds2
      @penguinsrbirds2 Pƙed rokem +28

      Oh my god I thought you were doing a bit in the comments. Like you were just going along with the joke. Then I Googled, and BIBLEMAN WAS A REAL THING WTF.

    • @garrethatch5362
      @garrethatch5362 Pƙed rokem +25

      @penguinsrbirds2 yeah, real and niche but real nonetheless. A good amount of Christian movies for kids were made in the times when cgi was first being a thing, VeggieTales is a good example of these kinds of productions

    • @aaronsmith4940
      @aaronsmith4940 Pƙed 10 měsĂ­ci +1

      Bro upload that shit asap

  • @SaltStorm007
    @SaltStorm007 Pƙed rokem +232

    ‘Sword of the spirit’😂I’m 💀!! Love Wizards with guns....always guaranteed to be hilarious!

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      S-word
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @raylee8906
    @raylee8906 Pƙed rokem +81

    Normally I don't like reboots, but this version of Bibleman is AWESOME!

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      It’s the darker hero trope that everyone wants
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @brandonlower65
    @brandonlower65 Pƙed rokem +31

    tbh "i knew i'd find you alone with a kid" fucking got me

  • @mikebeute4979
    @mikebeute4979 Pƙed rokem +257

    instant nostalgia! i miss the days when i'd watch this with my mom

    • @Finn_01
      @Finn_01 Pƙed rokem +14

      Frank Miller wrote this one, right?

    • @Olsenator
      @Olsenator Pƙed rokem +12

      @@Finn_01it was written by frank mueller and directed by Clinton Tarantino

    • @SwiftNimblefoot
      @SwiftNimblefoot Pƙed rokem +1

      @@Olsenator Quentin. Clinton, that is the democrat guy. :P

    • @meshavillar
      @meshavillar Pƙed rokem

      Yes you're right, Quentin Totino. The democratic president was Bill "Murray" Clinton

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      I’m a 2000s kid, but 90s seem like the peak.
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

  • @sonicexpert986
    @sonicexpert986 Pƙed rokem +53

    The first minute of this is so barely indistinguishable from the source material it's just... perfect. Then even more hilarity ensues :D

  • @voidtrotter
    @voidtrotter Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +19

    As a pagan getting sent this by your Christian friend at 6 am, this is phenomenal in a way my sleep deprived mind cannot comprehend right now

  • @thegargoylecumeth7932
    @thegargoylecumeth7932 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +4

    "And the Lord said 'put a claymore at every entrance so they can't escape'." đŸ€ŁđŸ€Ł

  • @pooptrainconductor64
    @pooptrainconductor64 Pƙed rokem +26

    This sketch has a higher production value than the original

  • @thefinalphantasm
    @thefinalphantasm Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +7

    I love how this isn't even that different from the actual show

  • @gabagook
    @gabagook Pƙed 4 měsĂ­ci +12

    The Wizard of Stealing came out from the closet and he called him gay wizard, lmao

  • @AlphaShark
    @AlphaShark Pƙed rokem +53

    I have always wanted to make a Bible Man parody and you beat me to it, DANG IT. CURSE YOU WIZARDS WITH GUNS! (But excellent video)

  • @HighLordComedian
    @HighLordComedian Pƙed rokem +38

    Its a shame they only ever made one episode of the contender series, Captain Qu'ran. I heard they cancelled it because it cost $3,000 per filmed minute.

    • @Sumschmuck
      @Sumschmuck Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci +11

      Explosives and airplanes don't come cheap

  • @hatientacetlen4246
    @hatientacetlen4246 Pƙed 10 měsĂ­ci +8

    "Jesus drank wine too" as he lies gasping on the floor.

  • @Ismatic1906
    @Ismatic1906 Pƙed rokem +97

    I love how this flashes between G is for Jesus episodes in between explosions. I absolutely love this cinematic universe. This will be Achilles heel for the MCU and will finally show the world the importance of christanity.

    • @gsleazy1975
      @gsleazy1975 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci

      Yep, kill evil with guns😂

    • @spider-man9118
      @spider-man9118 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci

      Well, everyone knows the importance of Christianity. I mean, America was founded on it. Haha based on it
      And it’s the “religion” that is not really a religion, it’s a relationship. The others are like “do this” and “do that” whereas Christianity is just “follow Me. We’re going to do some amazing stuff for God’s glory.”
      Ayo I don’t mean to force anything on anyone, but we have various types of evidence for biblical events. If anyone is interested, read on
      Brothers, what have we done. look at us. look at what we've become. This isn't right. we're wasting time going on about girls and sus drawings that don't give a f*ck about us. What is the point of lust? Why do we do this? This doesn't fix our problems, doesn't make the stress and pain go away.
      repent to God, friends. We must stay focused, brothers, on what really matters. I'm only 17, but I'm telling you, in the words of johnny cash, "sooner or later God will cut you down."
      you will lose almost everything important to you. please, for your sakes, repent and turn to Jesus. He is, in the words of Skillet, "better than drugs." He is also better than lust. love > lust. You'll find out that this is true. love may hurt, and same for lust, but lust will keep you chained down, eventually killing you mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and possibly physically.
      hell was never meant for us, my fellow youtube user. it was for the devil and his squad, and God gave us the Way out of there since we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.
      God knew we were wack, but He decided He was still come down and help us, despite our unfaithfulness. most relationships (like friendships, romantic relationships) aren't like this. Very few, but not a whole lot.
      religion (Christianity) is just a relationship with God along with loving others (see james 1:27)
      also, we have various types of evidence that backs up the Bible.
      Here's one example: Scientists have discovered that the earth "skipped" a day.
      The Bible explains how that happened. In the book of Joshua, Joshua asked the sun to stop so he and the Israelites could defeat their enemies. Then in 2 Kings, King Hezekiah learned he was dying, and pleaded to God to not let him die. God sent a prophet to king hezekiah who said hezekiah would live. Hezekiah wanted a sign, and that would be for the sun to defy the law of inertia and go back 10 degrees. NASA confirmed it and did the math (look it up for more info).
      We also found Noah’s Ark hanging out in turkey, along with anchor stones marked with crosses signifying that it’s a revered place, along with altars and many other things. Look it up, it’s good stuff.
      more evidence for the Bible concerning cosmology and divine revelation in job 26:7, proverbs 8:27, Isaiah 40:22 (read on)
      The idea that the earth was round can be dated back to 600 BC in Greece. It was more widely accepted around the 3rd century (300 BC-201 BC) Note: time was “labeled” differently back then. for example, year 3000, year 420, year 69, year 0, year 1, year 2
 and so on.
      Job 26:7: “. . .He [God] hangs the earth on nothing” The book of Job was supposedly written at 2100 BC.
      Proverbs 8:27: “. . .when He drew a circle on the face of the deep. . .” Proverbs was possibly written between 970 and 686 BC
      Isaiah 40:22: “it is He who sits above the circles of the earth. . .” Isaiah was written between 739 and 680 BC.
      How did they know about this? You tell me, my fellow Zoomerz.
      The Holy Spirit exists. I was a slave to s3xual sin for 7-ish d@mn years. Finally at 16, God freed me. Also, look up John Gabbana's (boonk gang) testimony. Dude did a lot of wacky stuff. He's changed now.
      also, the soul exists. someone i know (i won't say who- privacy reasons) saw their soul leaving their body. like pulling off a band-aid, except it doesn't hurt.
      I was suicidal for 9-ish months, but then I read John 3:16, and poof- the big sad went away in one night.
      There are also non-Christian sources who have confirmed the existence and divinity of Jesus, some of which were hostile towards Christianity, such as:
      Thallus (52 AD), who said Jesus lived, was crucified, and confirmed the darkness and earthquake that followed Christ’s crucifixion;
      Tacitus (56-120 AD), who called the followers of Christ Christians, confirmed that Jesus was crucified under Pontus Pilate’s command
      Talmud (400-700 AD), confirmed that the disciples were martyred for their faith, and confirmed Jesus was executed the day before the Passover, and said Jesus had “magical” powers
      Pliny the Younger (61-113 AD), who said that the Christians thought Jesus was/is God in the Flesh (God the Son)
      Phlegon (80-140 AD), who said Jesus had the ability to predict the future, and confirmed that Jesus was crucified during Caesar’s reign, confirmed Jesus rose from the dead, and confirmed He showed His wounds to confirm He was crucified.
      Celcus (175 AD), who said Jesus was born of a virgin, said His father is a carpenter, and confirmed Jesus had miraculous powers
      (See cold-case Christianity for more details)
      Here’s the physical evidence of Jesus and His Resurrection:
      1) No persecution would have started if He hadn’t come back (the disciples thought Jesus would never resurrect)
      2) The Roman soldiers would have paid with their lives if they failed at their jobs
      3) there was a 2-4 ton rock that 11-12 guys would have to move (they didn’t have any help. Everyone said “crucify Him”) major L to those opposed to Jesus
      4) there was a Roman seal which was a metal pin that sealed the tomb stone
      5) Stealing the Jesus’s body isn’t something the disciples would do (besides Judas. Although he hung himself after feeling remorse for betraying Jesus).
      6) the disciples wouldn’t die for what they knew would be a lie. (The lie being Jesus never made the ultimate comeback)
      faith and reason, people
      hit me up to learn more about how science proves the Bible or just about God in general

    • @Ismatic1906
      @Ismatic1906 Pƙed měsĂ­cem

      @@pricerowland?

  • @kadenray9190
    @kadenray9190 Pƙed rokem +12

    the best part is this is a real thing named Bibleman

  • @meshavillar
    @meshavillar Pƙed rokem +33

    1:54 The way he's stumbling around like a bumbling idiot, and how hard he hit the wall & trash can makes me bust out laughing😂 and the "bweugh" đŸ€ŁđŸ€ŁđŸ’€

    • @JS-ol4dx
      @JS-ol4dx Pƙed 3 měsĂ­ci +2

      Jesus drank wine too!

  • @darthdonkulous1810
    @darthdonkulous1810 Pƙed rokem +22

    As soon as he said "jesus christ!" I just knew he was going to get a rocket launcher lmao. Brilliant, brilliant stuff boys!

  • @friedkin71
    @friedkin71 Pƙed 5 měsĂ­ci +8

    Just seeing him stumble with the assault rifle you didn’t know he had after he threw the grenade made me laugh way harder than it should have.

  • @bigdoubleu117
    @bigdoubleu117 Pƙed rokem +333

    Ok, I'm Christian, but this is still hilarious.
    If it doesn't already, this needs Sequels.

  • @EHAmos
    @EHAmos Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci +7

    4:00 I fully expected Captain Bible to say, "No... Holy Bible."

  • @2percentright
    @2percentright Pƙed rokem +132

    It's really odd that Captain Bible thought the Wizard of Stealing was the Gay Wizard. The Gay Wizard doesn't look anything like the Wizard of Stealing. Her name's Tiffini. I've watched a lot of her homosexual videos with her girlfriends.
    A lot.
    She still hasn't made me gay yet.
    Thanks to you, Captain Bible!

    • @zealousdoggo
      @zealousdoggo Pƙed rokem +19

      I can also confirm she hasn't made me gay...
      -i already was in the first place-

    • @berwynsigns4115
      @berwynsigns4115 Pƙed rokem +3

      What is this referring to?

    • @2percentright
      @2percentright Pƙed rokem

      @@berwynsigns4115 lesbian porn

    • @jackbarman7063
      @jackbarman7063 Pƙed rokem +12

      @@berwynsigns4115probably straight dudes watching lesbian adult videos lol

    • @chinsaw2727
      @chinsaw2727 Pƙed 4 měsĂ­ci

      ⁠@@jackbarman7063
      Or women who are in the closet watching lesbian adult videos

  • @johnbryant1939
    @johnbryant1939 Pƙed rokem +6

    So I grew up as a preacher kid in rural Alabama. We didn't have a lot of money as a kid for Halloween costumes. So My mom got my a Bibleman costume one year and con me into wearing it every year as a kid, saying I'll be the coolest kid around if I wore it. I had the cape, mask, and crappy "light saber". Looking back it was a good child hood, but man those movies sucked.
    This brings back a LOT of memories, though.

  • @Bigdrangus
    @Bigdrangus Pƙed rokem +15

    Jesus drank so much wine his blood turned to alcohol so this is historically accurate

  • @Dinosaurman34
    @Dinosaurman34 Pƙed rokem +25

    I can’t wait for the sequel!
    Captain Bible vs Colonel Quran!

  • @amog8202
    @amog8202 Pƙed 11 měsĂ­ci +3

    We expected sunday school, and what we got was the pastor's twitter posts 8 hours later.

  • @Kano_Productions
    @Kano_Productions Pƙed rokem +6

    2:39 as a Catholic, that's esactly how it felt in 1st grade

  • @lanededominicis6068
    @lanededominicis6068 Pƙed rokem +37

    I have a lightsaber for some reason 😂

    • @Wizards_with_Guns
      @Wizards_with_Guns  Pƙed rokem +20

      He always would

    • @lanededominicis6068
      @lanededominicis6068 Pƙed rokem +4

      @@Wizards_with_Guns because he's Captain Bible. He's got one of the main elements you know like earth air fire water Bible, and the McRib

  • @jamisonw.6721
    @jamisonw.6721 Pƙed rokem +13

    goddamn, that opening is damn near shot for shot. Amazing stuff

  • @NikkiLayne
    @NikkiLayne Pƙed rokem +40

    As a kid who was raised in a Christian house and forced to watch Bible Man tapes growing up, you guys nailed the look and tone!

  • @DJ_Frankfurter
    @DJ_Frankfurter Pƙed rokem +10

    I can't believe you guys also know about Bible Man!! I was forced to watch some of those movies at my Baptist elementary school, and this parody really takes me back.

  • @elis88630
    @elis88630 Pƙed rokem +9

    YOU SHOT MY BIBLE!

  • @RamenDenominator
    @RamenDenominator Pƙed rokem +4

    There's still a few Captain Bible's Chicken Pail Restaurants remaining in Texas.

  • @Feature0311
    @Feature0311 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +9

    The perfect combination of the spoof Badman and Bibleman.
    This is pure genius. I seriously hope yall make an episode 2

  • @pricerowland
    @pricerowland Pƙed rokem +7

    So this guy just has a small bible stuffed into every crevice of his costume then. *Every crevice*

  • @strongman5243
    @strongman5243 Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +4

    0:53 he turned from captain bible to the shadow real quick

  • @gugan_1678
    @gugan_1678 Pƙed rokem +10

    I just wish the grenade would have been modeled after the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

  • @sleepyjoe730
    @sleepyjoe730 Pƙed rokem +11

    I never thought I'd live to see a Bibleman parody lmao this is great

  • @user-ej2bw9bd6s
    @user-ej2bw9bd6s Pƙed rokem +13

    I grew up watching Bible-Man as a kid. This is sketch captured the spirit of that show PERFECTLY!!! LMAOOOOOOO!!!

  • @NathanGrosse
    @NathanGrosse Pƙed rokem +39

    I love the set construction and costume work, my guys! This is a top-notch sketch. Thanks for sharing it with us all!

  • @overlorddante
    @overlorddante Pƙed rokem +14

    I think I speak for all of us when I say this needs to be a full length movie

  • @elmerhoward3484
    @elmerhoward3484 Pƙed rokem +4

    You shot my Bible (lightsaber to the brain) I can't quit laughing 😂

  • @drewcalhoun381
    @drewcalhoun381 Pƙed 2 měsĂ­ci +2

    The way he was walking up to the trash cans and shooting in them had me weak 😆

  • @gazblackheart4596
    @gazblackheart4596 Pƙed rokem +35

    Really well done parody of bibleman lol

  • @dfx13productions47
    @dfx13productions47 Pƙed rokem +5

    The perfect depiction of Bibleman

  • @christopherbuckley11
    @christopherbuckley11 Pƙed 5 měsĂ­ci +4

    No shadow on the lightsaber is a nice touch

  • @Me-wx1mt
    @Me-wx1mt Pƙed rokem +16

    ok but how does your suit actually look better than the one from bible man lmaoo

  • @theDehydratedWater
    @theDehydratedWater Pƙed rokem +8

    this isn't the Christian Bale Batman movie what the heck did I just fall for!!!!

  • @Brandon_Elizondo
    @Brandon_Elizondo Pƙed rokem +64

    At least he seems effective. Those criminals aren't going to escape from prison any time soon

    • @chaoticsilver8442
      @chaoticsilver8442 Pƙed rokem +14

      Those criminals aren't even going to prison to escape from! They're heading to the morgue.

    • @Disatiere
      @Disatiere Pƙed rokem +16

      @@chaoticsilver8442 Sent to god

  • @WeirdlyBad
    @WeirdlyBad Pƙed rokem +5

    I read CB as christian barnacle the whole time, I need to get myself checked up.

  • @beaks3538
    @beaks3538 Pƙed rokem +11

    Average Christian in 2023

  • @Bionicdodo24
    @Bionicdodo24 Pƙed rokem +5

    The line"i knew id find you alone with a kid" is hilarious

  • @brianm120
    @brianm120 Pƙed rokem +18

    another instant classic, loved 1:15 too much

  • @callmev3531
    @callmev3531 Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci +7

    2:03, Does this mean the only villain that can beat him is a gluttony-themed one that offers booze and drugs? Apparently, just because he stopped hating God, doesn’t mean he stopped loving “eating drugs”.
    Also, people below are calling him a bible-themed Punisher, but I’m getting more a heavily inebriated version of James Gunn’s Peacemaker/Crimson Bolt from this.

  • @DavidADII
    @DavidADII Pƙed rokem +10

    I just wanted to say, opening up the trash can and shooting inside it was possibly the funniest joke I've seen all year

  • @theopenrift
    @theopenrift Pƙed rokem +7

    You got me at the first sentence, well done!

  • @Kalesoup_
    @Kalesoup_ Pƙed rokem +73

    Wow, I hate God and love eating drugs too! Such a relatable character backstory, maybe I'll find a special book too someday!

    • @berwynsigns4115
      @berwynsigns4115 Pƙed rokem +2

      Go read Da Good and Spesho Book

    • @Grag235
      @Grag235 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +2

      Dude, just go into the woods, Bibles are one of the most easiest drops you can get on Earth, have you NOT gone outside??? There’s probably one next to a tree right now for no reason

    • @robogamin9613
      @robogamin9613 Pƙed 6 dny

      Hopefully it isn't Huckleberry Finn

  • @legengary5924
    @legengary5924 Pƙed rokem +4

    I was Bible Man one year for Halloween as a kid, this unlocked a lot of lost memories

  • @Courier117
    @Courier117 Pƙed rokem +9

    As Christians. That last part was Gold

  • @everett6072
    @everett6072 Pƙed rokem +5

    Captain Bible v Shovel Man, who would win?

  • @FreeAllenWrench
    @FreeAllenWrench Pƙed rokem +4

    I always confuse Captain Bibles huge rogues gallery. I thought that was the Fibbler.

  • @theasbridge9661
    @theasbridge9661 Pƙed rokem +8

    As some one who grew up watching “Bible Man” you guys nailed it. That was hilarious.

  • @gibblet8368
    @gibblet8368 Pƙed 9 měsĂ­ci +5

    - It's Gay Wizard!
    - But i'm Steal Wizard!
    - You make me gaaaaaay!

  • @glorbojibbins2485
    @glorbojibbins2485 Pƙed 5 měsĂ­ci +3

    I like that the cigarette in the beginning is between the wrong fingers

  • @obnoxas
    @obnoxas Pƙed 7 měsĂ­ci +6

    Oh boy, I remember watching exactly one episode of Bibleman. On repeat. On every road trip with the evangelical christian grandparents who I cut all contact with the moment I could.

    • @thisisSPARTAorsprite
      @thisisSPARTAorsprite Pƙed 4 měsĂ­ci +1

      Furry, checks out

    • @obnoxas
      @obnoxas Pƙed 4 měsĂ­ci +1

      @@thisisSPARTAorsprite What are you on about?

    • @thisisSPARTAorsprite
      @thisisSPARTAorsprite Pƙed 4 měsĂ­ci

      @@obnoxas cutting off grandparents for their religious beliefs. And your a small white Reddit browsing video game nerd furry loving goomer addicted to internet and weird niche inhumane interests
      (Not a dig just a description ) it just checks out

  • @lanatsif
    @lanatsif Pƙed 8 měsĂ­ci +3

    That "look out kid" is pure genius

  • @scoutclark6117
    @scoutclark6117 Pƙed rokem +5

    “YOU MADE ME GAY” (turns on full auto) 💀

  • @hoeton3
    @hoeton3 Pƙed rokem +9

    The most American hero i ever seen.

  • @ElNerdoLoco
    @ElNerdoLoco Pƙed rokem +7

    Oh no... You guys watched Bibleman and the only possible therapy was to remake him as if it were 2023? Why would you do that to yourselves? Stop now, else I fear your Psalty the song book remake.

  • @elvararchfeld9734
    @elvararchfeld9734 Pƙed rokem +11

    Me to femboys: 2:32

  • @therussianspy0725
    @therussianspy0725 Pƙed rokem +6

    Wizards coming back with great content like ever

  • @33Ciggy
    @33Ciggy Pƙed rokem +8

    That ending was pure 👌👌

  • @S.A.Masquerade
    @S.A.Masquerade Pƙed rokem +6

    This needs a sequel!! Love to see your guy's take on the theme song, and the rehash of literally the same villain dressed up in different costumes and names, and the overly brutal deaths with exploding gore everywhere! (That all was actually in Bibleman).

  • @Sharingon700
    @Sharingon700 Pƙed rokem +9

    I actually had to watch Bible Man as a kid, this was surreal. Great video guys!

  • @calumhouston3308
    @calumhouston3308 Pƙed rokem +2

    This Captain Bible is like a Judge Dredd parody. I love it.

  • @michaelisntcool
    @michaelisntcool Pƙed rokem +5

    This is now one of my favourite sketches you guys have made. Please make more with this theme! XD

  • @sammadhasnain6051
    @sammadhasnain6051 Pƙed rokem +7

    You people never cease to amaze me with your creativity. Best channel

  • @MrMagicPenguin12
    @MrMagicPenguin12 Pƙed rokem +4

    Holy shit?? The costume game & editing on this is such an upgrade. amazing job guys, this one really got me.

  • @HeWhoNutsLoudest
    @HeWhoNutsLoudest Pƙed rokem +33

    Takes me back to being a young lad in bible study
if only bible man was this hilarious
    Also, great costumes!