Trust your hunger and make peace with food | Eve Lahijani | TEDxUCLA
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- čas přidán 8. 07. 2015
- Learning to listen to yourself and trust yourself can be very difficult for some people. Eve Lahijani talks to us about the importance of learning to do so especially when it comes to our hunger and diet.
Eve Lahijani is a Registered Dietitian and Nutrition Health Educator at UCLA.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx
I've seen many videos about this topic, and one of them said: "your life's purpose is not to lose weight". This really resonated with me, and I hope this is able to help others
Thank you. I have wasted 40 years obsessing about being thin and food and diets. It’s horrifying to think how much of my potential I’ve wasted. I probably could have cured cancer. I just saw another RD’s video and something she said hit me too (paraphrasing), “You are literally STARVING YOURSELF when on a diet. For millennia, humans fought to NOT starve to death and yet you are doing it willingly.”
however, your life’s purpose is ALSO not to die from type 2 diabetes.
@@jake38201 That makes sense, but also I think why that struck me is that I don't have to associate everything in my life with my weight, my food, and eating.
@@mittyxxx8791 as long as you keep healthy, like go for a walk every once in a while, you good. just don’t be 500 pounds.
@@jake38201 thanks! point taken.
When she said she had Girl Scout cookies and forgot they were there.. I felt that
Glad that resonated
That IS huge deal for people who’ve dealt with eating disorders ! Same!
Amen 🙏
As I have struggled with an eating disorder and constantly yo-yo with my weight (eat, starve, eat, starve), I always return to this talk when I feel afraid or lost. It's awfully confusing and scary to have a horrible relationship with food, but this talk encourages me to challenge myself time after time
Thank you for sharing this! So glad that you found a way to challenge yourself. Keep going, and if you can, find support!
I started a keto diet.. And I realised how much time of my day is spent planning and thinking about food..
Too much time and money west in keto it's not natural way to lv life
@@user-wy3ee8kd5t is Keto good for weigh loss, I was a good weight a couple months ago & happy but have gained a stone in 2 months & scared that it’ll keep rising! Any tips to get back to my original weight??
@@fabzfeast9008 keto diet works of course, but it's not a good diet in my opinion from personal experience. Eat varied and healthy food, while being in a calorie deficit and you will lose the weight naturally and feel good. Losing weight is easy for me, and I love foods like oatmeal, sweet potatoes, beans, fruits, vegetables etc. These are great food sources, especially when it comes to losing weight, so don't stay away from them.
Best way to lose weight for me is: drink plenty of water during the day ( when you wake up, feel hungry, and right before you eat your meal) it makes you feel fuller, satisfied sooner and lose cravings. Eat a lot of proteins and fibers, it will keep you full longer. Avoid food with processed sugar added to it, you don't need any processed sugar at all! There are no benefits, and it give you cravings more easily for unhealthy foods. No need to overtrain, just make sure to be active during the day.
If you do this for 1month and stay consisted you will realise that you no longer crave those bad foods. You feel better overall, and your taste buds change. Foods you usually don't enjoy, will become enjoyable. But if you want to have pizza with your friends or whatever, then go for it! And don't feel bad about it! It doesn't matter what you eat in a day, it's all about what you eat for a long period.
This is what works for me. (it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle)
Find out what works for you, and be unhealthy with friends, or family once in a while AND FEEL GOOD ABOUT IT.
Focusing on a keto diet is not a good plan in my opinion. Avoiding healhty carb sources... you will get results, and you will stop the diet at some point, and then you end up with no clue on how to proceed. You know what I mean? anyway gl
You might try the book, My Physician, Myself' written by a man in his seventies. It was a huge factor in restoring my health.
This is so true
I had major trouble with food from 1986 to 2011. That's a long time. What a waste of a lifetime. But I just want to say it's possible to change. I can now keep Girl Scout cookies in the house and forget they're there. I eat whatever my body craves. When I'm finished, I make no judgments. And don't think about a food anymore until the next mealtime. I don't know how it happened but it did.
That's so awesome Cynthia! It's such a blessing to have peace with food in that way.
I’m happy for you. ❤️
And aren't you gaining weight?? I'm afraid to do that...
@@mel3636 maybe in the beginning if you were previously restricting, but your weight will level out and you will not gain very much weight. Your body will stay stable as long as you are eating when you are hungry and stopping when you're comfortably full:)
@@renee187 oh that makes sense... thanks :)
starving, punishing yourself with suppression, never ends well.
Well said Triple Threat!
@jasondt02 Specific evidence for this claim? Starvation (0-1 on hunger scale) is a set up for a binge. Those in recovery from eating disorders would disagree with you, as would nutritionists.
ⵜⴰⵏⵉⵔⵉ Taniri hunger is a natural human signal the body gives the brain to signal it requires fuel (food). That is a basic biological need. Thinking hunger is a sickness is simply an illogical claim. Every single human has hunger. One should eat when they are hungry to fuel the body and mind. Ignoring hunger cues and starving oneself is not normal. It’s a disordered mindset, even if not a full blown eating disorder.
fasting is a good thing to do. It cleans your body and it’s been proved. It’s very healthy.
“The rule of thumb was: the more restrictive I became, the bigger my binges got” - Related to this so much, thank you for this talk Eve. Often there is so much talk in the media about what to eat, what’s healthy/what’s not, and the availability of food (it’s all around). However, no one seems to note the importance of the mental aspect of it. Tuning into oneself and feeling at peace with food however is HUGE, and the biggest part of sustainability honestly.
I recently started getting blood tests and I found out my binges were very dangerous. My kidney and liver enzymes were not good after a binge but returned to normal after. For 40 years I had no idea these binges were actually hurting my body until I started getting more frequent blood tests.
"The way we do anything is the way we do everything." This talk was very profound, for me anyway. This way of listening to our bodies and removing the shame from eating is important, and translates to other areas of our lives, as she explained.
Anton, I am glad to hear the talk resonated for you. Thank you for your kind comments!
"The way we do anything is the way we do everything." That isn't the case at all - not even a little bit.
Love that quote!! If someone does something mindlessly, chances are they do that for everything else in their life. Or pessimistically, optimistically, attention to details or not, organized or not, good time management or not. It's so obvious when you observe others in this world!
Interestingly I found that the process of intuitive eating feels similar to the konmari method for cleaning your house. You listen to your body and focus on the things that it needs, or what sparks joy, and get rid of the rest!
One of the best talks on our relationship to food. So much dysfunction going on, especially from the government (lame dietary recommendations), fad diet authors, and sadly, the medical (MD) community, who usually don't have a clue or worse. A well spent 10 minutes of sane recommendations for being healthy on many levels. Great job Eve!
+jackflintstone Thanks so much for the comments Jack!
When I started eating like this, it changed my life.
How are things going three years later?
@@AnimaLibera It’s been going pretty well. I fluctuate within an acceptable range of weight (i check by looking at the mirror but never weigh myself), most of the days I go by this, just don’t be strict, others days u might eat to socialize but ur body will compensate for it on its own.
@@yahiakhaled253 So it's working. Good to know. Thanks!
As someone who has had a negative relationship with food their whole life, this was so refreshing. I’ve always eaten breakfast in the morning before school/my day just to get it out of the way, even when I’m not hungry. It’s wild that I’ve never thought to wait and eat until I’m hungry.
I understand, when we are told what to do - it's hard to imagine that maybe if we listen, our bodies can help guide us!!
Down-to-earth, excellent talk. Listening to your body is key...
Thank you Luci, I am glad it resonates with you!
You might try the book, My Physician, Myself' written by a man in his seventies. It was a huge factor in restoring my health.
@@vitamineve I hadn't seen your reply, but yes, it def resonates with me
@@yankee2666 awesome, I'll check it out
@@lusilva9911 glad it resonates!
Everything she mentioned about her past and her relationship with food in the past is where I am right now. If only I can bright as even a fraction of how she is mentally and physically now, I'd be grateful. She is my inspiration to get better and eventually and hopefully to get to where she is right now, in freedom. The hard-hitting thing she said is "how can you make peace with others when you're at a war with yourself", this has to be the most relatable thing for me at this dark stage in my life. She really did well in delivering this whole talk the right way.
Why !?are you a ham beast or what
Korea
Have a look into a plant-based diet, that's the answer. 😘
Incorporate mindful meditation into your life and you will see the open door. Good luck!
Plant based diet really is the answer. You can eat as much as you like there. Somethings in there are required everyday that are very filly, great tasting and will reduce your appetite.
A carton of natural yoghurt daily
A table spoon of raw chocolate cacao nibs with a teaspoon of honey or just dark chocolate
Beans
Berries
Nuts and seeds
Whole meal cereals
I would be nice if people talk about that one of the facts you have problem with "trusting" your body when it tells you to eat or not is thanx to that "parenting" you had when your parents obligated you to eat and/or to finish your food when you didn't feel like.
Rosangela Sena I recommend Eating Less by Gillian Riley.
Rosangela Sena this is what I wrote my masters thesis on! Parental pressure to eat and obesity.
Jayne Duncan - that sounds intersting! Is your thesis available somewhere online?
My dad always "forced" me to finish my plate and I've been struggling my entire life with leaving food. I don't blame him though, because firstly that was the way he'd learned it himself, and secondly because I ate very little as a child and he was worried about me :)
That's very pertinent. Search for "baby led weaning" on google.
Yeah, I never know if I'm hungry or full or nervous, or just having some kind of "stomach sensations"; so I get what she says about trusting your own body but I have actually no idea how to interpret the signals my body is sending me
"the way you do anything is how you do everything" my favourite line. I loved the talk!
Eve, 0:14 I can’t thank you enough. 50 years of yo yo dieting and obsession with food and finally I have put the scale away and I am following your 1 to 10 hunger scale. Our bodies tell us when to use the restroom as you said and it will tell us when to eat at 3 on the scale and when to stop at 6. Great presentation. Ghh Montana
I realized it has to do with a person's energy level. I crave empty foods high in carbs when I have 5 hours of sleep, I'm depressed, or feeling powerless over some problem. The more energy I feel in my body, the less I crave junk food. I think diets don't work because of our habits.
Kindest approach, most beautiful formula, and prohuman way of loosing weight,I stand in ovation for this teacher who first and foremost walks its talks.
Thank you Karmen! I am touched that you feel this way :)
Karmen Sittama Tarina one of the first pincipals of intuitive eating is rejecting weightloss mentallity, it is about liberation and acceptance, even if you gain weight you have to trust that it is the right thing for your body,we all come in different shapes and sizes and for some people it is acctually better to be in a relatively higher weight, because of hormones, genes etc
i hope this clarifies it a bit, good luck 😊
@@axllil nooooo..... it's never better to be at a higher weight than your ideal weight. Never! A lot of health problems come with weighing too much and health is everything.
@@aspiemom7327 if u eat intuitively u will be in ur "ideal weight", BMI chart is a ruff guide, it won't apply to everyone
Only way u could be obese or overweight eating intuitively is if u have a hormonal illness or sth
The thing is many people eat when they are bored, that's not intuitive eating
@@axllil that's fair. I just didn't want anyone thinking it's ok to be heavy. The higher end of an ideal weight is fine, especially if you have an hourglass figure. You are so right about the numbers! Muscle weighs more!
I'm currently in war with food, what you said is exactly what is happening to me right now. I'm really glad that I have a person to relate and consult to .
The concept at the end of this video, about finding empathy with others when you empathize with yourself really struck me.
Glad it resonated with you : )
Well, it's easier to be kind to others when you are at peace with yourself. The problem is.. how to get to that point...
I am recovering from hypergymnasia, I have to always burn everything, I get extreme hunger many times, its something I can really relate, and I dont wish to recover from my eating disorder. I want to restrict, I want to be thin and I want to control my body and food. I cannot lose control , I want to hold on to the only thing that I can control in my life which is my body.
Exactly my thoughts... I see you bud and im here for you.
@@cemre3633 Thank you
She was also right about withdrawing from the world. At 40 years old I would find myself angry because my boss wanted to take me out to lunch. I realized... I was deeply broken if I couldn't even enjoy the simple act of going out to lunch. My world got smaller and smaller because I didn't want to enjoy events with people and in the end, probably took in more calories because I would binge.
So glad that felt validating. Hope your world got to re-expand!
Thank you for this talk. I also struggled with binge eating in the past and yesterday I overate. I was feeling guilty today and decided to search up mindful eating videos as per usual. I’m so glad I came upon this video :)
“How you do anything, is how you do everything “ Love that
Glad you love it! Thank my dad ; )
Eating is such an effort for me. life is so busy eating is just another chore.
This video actually encouraged me to cook a meal for the first in about a month and not to ignore my hunger thank you
That's awesome Amy! Thank you for sharing that :)
my over eating is a deep, deep rooted, emotional, psychological programmed record that repeats itself in my mind, about how terrible a person i am, and it manifests itself thru eating . so its no easy fix .
Hi Spacies - I am so sorry, that sounds really painful. You are right - there is no easy fix - but there is help, and peace with food is a journey. Please seek help - even send me an email on my website. I hope to hear from you!
i believe you, i hope i can walk it out.thanks
@@spacies8882 you should try yoga it will change your life,get DDP yoga dvd/videos and just do the stand up tape if you cant get on the floor thats what I did along with this video and I feel real good lately
Making peace with food is the one thing rarely spoken about. I appreciate and can identify with this more than many other things regarding relationships with food.
Glad you can appreciate this aspect of eating well.
I need help....I am constantly tracking my macros and calories ALL DAY long and I am obsessed! It isn't fun anymore. I am 105 pounds, lean and muscular (I go to the gym too). I am so afraid of getting chubby or losing my abs. It's getting crazy. I don't trust my own ques at all.
I'm counting calories too because I don't trust my sense of portion sizes, cravings or other things. I eat because of a lot of reasons: boredom, tiredness etc.. I'm really confused now... What if you need to lose weight initially?
@@swedishgirl2506 you should read the book Principles of Intuitive Eating, it covers all of your questions! I can e-mail you the PDF!
Hope you are doing better, Robin.
@@landrytheraccoon Thank you, I am now down to 100 pounds, and I am still calculating my macros. But I have gotten much more accurate at it.
I know tracking can be obsessive, been there. It might help if u try to find the roots of why you want to look a certain way and what the “advantages” are of accomplishing that by tracking calories and macros, even if you feel constantly deprived and have stopped enjoying foods. It certainly helped me. Hope u are doing better
I'm addicted to yr voice
I don't know what to say...
Wow...this is exactly what I needed to be told. The donuts are still in my cupboard and I just ate burger because I was so badly craving it.
Also I've been judgemental about my food choices since forever and Didn't lose the weight. Okay no more judgements. Only the love and acceptance for food and my body ❤
Edit: Now my cravings and depression because of cravings is almost gone. Am feeling better and sheddign the weight too....I watched this video just 13 days back from writing this edit in my comment. So, this much difference is being made in just 13 days
Omg hey how's it going? How much weight have u lost Total?
I've had a strained relationship with food for years, at first I was afraid to click on this video, that it might trigger me but I decided to take a leap of faith and watch it. Best decision! I love how she talks about her journey and I want to be a RDN! I want to get my MS!
I was going through same situation.. fad diets.. eating less .. I loosed weight but never kept it away.. I got those weight back.. then I tried intermittent fasting.. it made me weak..I didn't loose any weight.. it didn't work for me.. after doing everything for 2 year.. I was very strict with food nd workout.. then I thot let's give it a break.. nd I started eating mindfully.. slowly and healthy..and moving more.. I eat junks once a week.. I think it's okay to give it a break.. nd m feeling healthier now..
I agree
I felt every word she said😭
So very true. Whenever I decide to go on a diet and feel guilty about eating, I either gain weight (due to stress) or lose nothing. Whenever I don't care AT ALL, I actually end up losing. I found it a bit weird, but now I understand why it happens
The only time I managed to lose 8kg in a year by only altering my diet was when I only ate healthy, without feeling guilt.
So glad you understand the pattern better after watching this!
What a brilliant talk. Thank you so much.
one of the best videos I've ever heard! gave me such hope about being able to make peace not only with food but also with myself and the world!
So genuine, so beautiful...Thank you so much!
I'm literally in tears. Thank you
This could possibly change lives 💜
Thank you Shriya!
Wow so inspiring thank you 💚 i pray any food obsession is now lifted from my being and anyone experiencing this, for me it all started as I started to water fast for 2 weeks my whole body went in shock and since then I have been challenged with food even though it is all kept to the minimum which actually I feel does not help. Anyways yes Peace on all aspects of being 🌹 Love, light and miracles to all 🌈
this video really opened my eyes
perfect!!! thanks for sharing and hope it helps those who are looking to make peace with food and trust their gut
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS VIDEO!
You're amazing.
The most important life lesson in the most enjoyable way. She is an example of what she said. THIS CHANGED MY LIFE. FOREVER GRATEFUL.
Thank you for sharing this!!! That is FANTASTIC!!!
Thank u for sharing your experience : ) Whenever I cry during a talk I know it was worth the time to listen to.
She’s very pretty and a good speaker
Thanks Cubefarmer Hkc :)
Thank you for your talk! At age 16 I restricted myself to eat basically only veggies and starved myself for a year. After having to eat restricted foods in a new family, I couldn't cope with it and enjoyed my escape from the rules I put to myself. I had never thought that those same rules were the reason the cycle kept going on. After thinking about the talk, for the first time I fried an omelette with oil for myself and had some salmon for breakfast. And I am even keeping cookies in the kitchen that I bought in the morning. I am very scared to see if trusting myself will fail or I am strong enough to finally live without those terrible rules. At least I know it is possible, although very hard.
I needed that. Thank you 💞❤
This was an amazing talk. I almost pressed skip because the beginning didn’t quite resonate with me, as most of my issues surrounding food are trauma based. But the rest of this absolutely nailed it. Even with different circumstances the answer is still the same. I’m saving this to return again. Wow.
Fab talk, so well put together. ✨
I'm so happy to see this here! Good job. This is really wonderful, Eve.
Thank you for watching Mary Kay!
Absolutely amazing. The delivery of the speech is flawless. Will watch this over and OVER again. Thanks a whole bunch :)
Thank you Niclas! Your words went to my heart, glad you found it helpful!
A wonderful talk ❣️
Wow......the scale really makes sense .....you are beautiful.....thank you for sharing....I need to find the freedom and stop with the diets......eat when I first get hungry......thank you
Wonderful talk! It was a gentle reminder that I veered off the path of working with my body. Thank you.
Hi koprowsk! Thank you for your kind words :) I am so glad you got a gentle reminder to reconnect with your body!
This was really insightful in making "peace with my eating habits" helps me make peace with other areas of my life. I'm a vegan and recently I've been binging of junk food (at least what I thought it was junk food) peanut butter sandwiches, with chips (just because potato chips are greasy ), turkey sandwiches with mayo red onions and avocado or a large mushroom/spinach pizza... Hmm... Am I eating unhealthy or being too hard on myself?... The hunger fullness scale was so good to see I glad I watched this...
So relatable. You are describing my relationship with food to t. I’m going to change that.
It's. Just. Perfect.
I know what she is talking about. Loved this talked and advices.
wow this is a little bit too relatable. its such a relief to know that other people who have struggled with this have recovered for good
This is actually really helpful
Great comparison at the begining that really makes sense.
FANTASTICO de la Vidaa!!!, Thanks!! Eve
MERCI Romina!!!
This is REALLY good! It's ridiculous anymore to go in a grocery store and being afraid of everything there! We need to enjoy what we eat.
Love your talk Eve! Great reminders to nourish with love. :)
Thank you Karmen! Love is always the answer, even with food ; )
Loved this talk so much!!! Thank you for reminding how to make peace with myself
Camila, I am so glad you remembered that!! Good for you : )!
awesome talk!
Great talk!
Eve: I've been a fan of TED talks for years and was excited when I saw you had a done a piece. I have to say it was definitely one of the best talks I've seen thus far and think you did an incredible job. Such an important message you made, especially for young girls who face food struggles given societal pressures. Bravo to you!
+Candice S. Hi Candice, I really appreciate your thoughtful comments and support!! Thank you :)!!
Candice, thank you for this beautiful compliment! I am glad you know the importance of feeding yourself and loving your body in this day and age!
Love this talk ❤ I have experienced the same things and now it's 2 months that I'm eating intuitive! That's great even though I'm a little nervous for September since school starts again and I don't know how I'll react to stress...
Hi, i'd like to start intuitive eating. can i ask how you're doing right now with it? thank you : )
thank you eve lahijani
You're welcome Somdev Rajan : )
Thank you 🙏 great 👍
So much of this resonated with me... Maybe this will be the turning point, I will certainly try
Glad it was helpful, hope things are going well!
There is a lot of truth in this talk, however, the reason why we postpone our hunger, e.g. for lunch, is that eating is (at least for me) a social event, and if all the people ate in the very moment when they start to feel hungry, there would be no gatherings around food and we would miss so much of social life. Of course, when I get too hungry, I grab a small snack - but I guess for a healthy person it is no big deal to wait with eating for a while...
This topic makes me so passionate. I’m pursuing the same degree and it makes me so excited to begin my career in helping others find peace with food! 💜💜
Yesssss! Good for you :) !
What an incredible talk - the best I've heard on food. Thank you.
Thank you, I am glad you found it helpful!!
this talk may have changed my life
I loved listening to you, Eve Lahijani. Thanks!!
My pleasure Kubra! Glad it was helpful :)
Hooked on the first minute! Great analogy
Thank you Maria!
Thank you! Finally somebody's got it!
Thank you for this - went straight to my heart!
Đã là fan thì mãi mãi là fan😉💗
Definitely one of the best talks I've heard in a very long time.
Wow!! Thank you Sunshine!
Thankyou.
loveee this!
Such a great talk!!!!! AND funny! How on earth does it only have 14K views???????
Thanks Jay! Glad I made you smile :)!!
Genuinely one of the best ted talks I’ve ever listened to... she was an amazing speaker🌟💖
Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it :)
I especially liked your discussion of the eating chart and about having unconditional kindness for ourselves. Thanks!
My pleasure - I am glad it was helpful!
Beautiful talk, I love this!
Thank you Heather!
Perfeita sem defeitos.
Obrigado!
This is life-changing
Glad it was helpful SparkRunner123!
I needed this. I struggled a lot and she set me free
Glad you are FREE!!!
I definitely have a love-hate relationship with food. She made a good point.
amazing, thank you!
Happy to help!
I love this speech!!
Thank you!!
👌 Thank you 🙏🏽
THAT'S GOOD STUFF BABY! REAL GOOD STUFF! THANK YOU FOR YOUR STORY!
THANK YOU BABY!
wonderful talk !! thanks !!
Thank you!
A+ she did an amazing job. Her speech reminded me of forensics oratory. She would've scored well
Wow! Thank you Michaela!!
Love this thx
Thanks you so much for this talk. I really did not know that other people delt with similar disfunctional eating habits like I did, and I was stuck in the dieting- bingeing cycle for so long that I felt that I will be on a diet all my life, but this really makes me believe that I can makes me believe that I can make peace with food and my own self
YES!! I am so glad you are feeling more hopeful! There are several books, coaches, therapists, and dietitians like myself that help people who struggle with unsupportive eating habits. Reach out! Sending you healing vibes on your food journey :)
I'm sorry but I hate HATE myself right now. It's just so hard to love myself when I have been binging like crazy and have gained 10 kilos. I exercise then I eat so much that the effect of my exercise is completely cancelled out. I flinch if someone hugs me because I don't want anyone to touch me while I'm so big. I hate being seen by people and for some damn reason I just cannot stop binging. This has been going for so long,I have no idea about what I should do. I tried sharing it with my friends but I sometimes feel like I'm playing the victim and even my friends don't take me seriously. I feel so guilty,lost and hopeless. I really need help.
I do understand how love for your self can feel so conditional on how you are eating - and so when that doesn't go right - it can be so painful! Also - it can be scary to eat so much - and frustrating when you are trying so hard!! Addressing eating issues can be HARD! It's the hardest thing I have ever done - and so please visit my website and send me a message. I want to offer you a "Food Freedom" coaching call as my gift to you. I hope to hear from you Mythili!!