How to be around someone who has hurt you | Dr. Henry Cloud
Vložit
- čas přidán 26. 07. 2023
- It can be hard to be around someone who has hurt you in the past. Dr. Cloud offers advice on how to handle being around someone who wronged you in the past-and how to be firm in your boundaries without being cold or distant. Don't let yourself be pulled into downward spirals of rumination about how they have wronged you or what might have been different had things gone differently. Releasing yourself from that negative, unproductive line of thinking will help to create a healthier dynamic between you. Changing your mindset to be more objective can psychologically limit the effect of being around someone who has hurt you in the past.
Go to www.boundaries.me/coach to get a week of free coaching, no credit card required. Just put in your email and we’ll send you the link! - Zábava
Thank you for realizing that being around an ex depends on circumstances. I suffer from PTSD and my ex is still abusive.
Awesome message Dr. Cloud! I try my best to be there for my grandchildren even though I'm triggered by my ex husband. If I'm in a situation where I think that I will be extremely triggered, I stay away!
Don't ever be around them if they are a narcissist and if you have a choice. Who wants to be around a demon that acts like they are an angel to others? My narcissistic brother in law would act all nice when my parents came around or anyone else, but when I was alone with him he would always say disgusting things, and he is a missionary. Disgusting people don't deserve civil behavior. He would whisper things like "Are you still working at your worthless job?" then others wouldn't believe me when I told them because "He's a missionary".
To some extent you are right....but on the other side there is a sense that I get when I am around toxic people my antennas go up and I am guarded ...not realistic to keep putting yourselves out there. Its't not worth the risk!!
❤ Great message doc. But just today I was dumped on by a friend who was triggered by something I said and is playing games of control and I am so hurt. I need his help driving but hates how he treated me.
Try to find someone else to help….like maybe a female?? Guys are not good driving teachers unless they’re being paid 😮
Sounds like these are the type of children who expect the world to revolve around them, no matter what.
My mother literally told me this about being around my BPD/NPD older sister at family holiday get togethers AFTER I witnessed many of my sister’s violent outbursts including trying to choke our mother where I was the one having to call the police to stop her from choking our mother. It’s gaslighting 101. I have never felt safe around my older sister because of her violent behavior, but my mother would guilt me into it and to include my children, too.
😮💨 Oh Family Dr. Cloud Thank You For The Advice
Her adult children need to grow up and stop being psychologically abusive to their mother. Clearly, though, the apples didn’t fall from their father’s tree.
Listen to you !! You have no context as to anything - stay within your own "boundary"
@@blessingsfromheaven8445
I have plenty of context. Apparently, you have a comprehension problem.
@@blessingsfromheaven8445
You are clearly the type of person who victim blames and enables abusers.
I used to feel really jealous being around my x and the replacement spouse for my son's and grandkids' sakes. Time helped because she reached out to me, and I became more comfortable with her personally. What really helped exponentially was discovering that my x is a covert Narc, and his abuses in our marriage were not about me as much as they were to satisfy his own selfish desires. This cured the jealousy, because I saw that our failed marriage lasted only as long as I was able to accept the abuse, and he didn't end it because I wasn't good enough for him. It never would have become what I waited for 17 years to have with him. It didn't then, and it couldn't now. The replacement had nothing to do with my lost hope. Only that she gets to spend the golden years going on cruises with a man I never knew.
Your example of the BD PARTIES, is the only time I spend with my Grand's other Grandma. She doesn't really care for me and could care less for her. She has no personality, can't conversate, SO my take with her is be cordial .....say hell-o and move on. Nothing lost nothing gained. I do it for my Grand's....their Great!! They deserve my attention in spite of her.
Türkçe alt yazı olmalı❤