Dirk Nowitzki Gives Conan The Texas Citizenship Test | CONAN on TBS

Conan claims to be a Texas expert, but the Dallas Mavericks All-Star has a little quiz to make him prove it.
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Airing weeknights since 2010, CONAN on TBS is home to topical monologues, remote segments, celebrity interviews, musical performances and stand-up from the top comedians in the world. Watch highlights, outtakes and behind the scenes footage of Conan palling around with sidekick Andy Richter, tormenting Associate Producer Jordan Schlansky and playing the latest video games on Clueless Gamer.
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Dirk Nowitzki Gives Conan The Texas Citizenship Test | CONAN on TBS
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[@richardleonhard3971]

Dirk's "German" sounds like google translated it and Conan's German is what happens when you play scrabble outside and a hurricane hits you

[@JFKJrJrPlanetX]

you made me laugh

[@LXTaxFraud]

i think dirk got the text from the shows managers

[@i3alphamale571]

Richard Leonhard I am German, his German is completly normal...

[@papamopp]

I〈3AlphaMale Dann hör mal genau hin was Dirk sagt! Das ist nicht die richtige Grammatik!

[@richardleonhard3971]

I〈3AlphaMale It definitely is not.

[@Apropoetic]

I think it's rare to come across someone who geniunely doesn't like Dirk.

[@DeanGl]

Yeah. I'm a die-hard Spurs fan and back when the rivalry with the Mavs was at its height, I really hated the Mavericks. That said, I liked Dirk. He is just too freaking good and a class act. I absolutely despised Mark Cuban though. lol!

[@Apropoetic]

DeanGl
I can understand a lot of people not liking Mark Cuban, but I have to say he certainly breathed new life into the Mavs organization and you can tell he is enthusiastic about the game.

[@vincelampa4095]

I'm a Spurs guy, but I always have love for Dirk. He's a genuine class act, and I was so happy to see him win in 2011 after getting robbed in 2006.
I also enjoy what Cuban brings to the table. It's rare you have an owner that isn't afraid to speak his mind, and it looks like he truly cares about his team. I often read anecdotes about how the Mavs facilities are among the best in the NBA.

[@DonCapoeira]

DeanGl
In return I also like and truly respect Tim Duncan even though I'm a Mavs fan. Dirk and Tim are both class individuals. Throw Hakeem Olajuwon in there as another classy big man who won a title in Texas. Texas b-ball has been blessed with classy big men.

[@ichbinnilsroth]

Apro yes

[@LOCOnarwhal]

I forget just how tall Conan and Andy are. They actually look normal next to 7 foot tall Dirk

[@cancerfour69er]

LOCOnarwhal Who?

[@Scarx2gt]

LOCOnarwhal it's been established that Conan is 6'4 with really good posture. Andy is at least 6'1/6'2 judging by how he looks only a few inches shorter than Conan lol.

[@LOCOnarwhal]

408 Magenta Huh, I would've pegged Conan at 6'5 and Andy at least 6'3.

[@konoko196]

damn surprised Andy is that tall didn't look short vs a 7 footer

[@kombinationkid]

You stole what I was just fixing to comment asshat

[@General0006RBX]

"Which two foreign countries does Texas boarder?" "Mexico and The United States."
I am from south Texas and this claim is true.

[@alemanrobert78]

So true. Texas is it's own country.

[@initialisms2970]

GenStudios I'm from Houston. And it is true

[@brendonnorris6831]

I agree. from San Antonio

[@primeevantv6487]

Greetings from Corpus Christi

[@redmaengda]

Very true. Greetings from the 903!

[@giannibetancur2798]

"whats the leading cause of heart attacks in texas"
"Tony Romo"
2:00 I died

[@Kas-rp4zb]

Javale McGOAT so true

[@knutate]

RonnyDonny13 sad cowboy you can pretend to win the super next decade

[@kkim5000]

so did they.

[@hardsandwich8311]

Of a heart attack?

[@MrGahbage1]

yeah cuz he sucks and always got destroyed by my SKINS #HTTR

[@deanambrose9]

I didn't understand Dirk's german sentence and I'm from germany.

[@Nisced]

+Dean Ambrose same. xD whatever though :D

[@officialkirin7219]

+Dean Ambrose Ist glaub von der Grammatik auch vollkommener Blödsinn.

[@SmokingBirds]

+Daniel Lund jab. grammatikalisch falsch. der wurde bestimmt von einem amerikaner ausgedacht.

[@theunknown2864]

+SmokingBirds Oder Mir Google übersetzer

[@dean3658]

+Dean Ambrose ich denke die wollten einfach nur schwere wörter im satz haben und haben das einfach so zusammengewürfelt

[@TheCaesarMania]

You know you’re a legend when the crowd pops just from someone saying your name. It was like one level of applause when they knew who it was, and then it elevated to another level after “Dirk Nowitzki”. Amazing

[@crizzey]

you're a genius. there arent even any spectators in that studio. you're reacting to artificial sound effects

[@peteswafflemeyer5620]

Conan's "German" sounded like when Hitler and Rumpelstielzchen had a child with speech impediment and they lobotomized it and then put it on speed.

[@theman1412]

and it was good friends with Arnold Schwarzenegger

[@caschdiify]

So damn accurate.... 😱

[@Nergal_Slayer]

Lol

[@latinolawdog5067]

That’s probably because he’s not German. He’s American.

[@Freestyle8Football]

he pronounced the german words like americans do :D

[@cameronmccabe2789]

Being in the US for so long had probably taken him back in Germany.

[@extremerFatalist]

+ronskie donskie He probably did that accent on purpose.

[@shamanman100]

Yeah I think he did it on purpose

[@hannajtg6009]

+Fatalist No think not

[@Mysterios1989]

When you hear him speaking in Germany, you don't hear an American accent. But to be honest, it happens if your brain is wired to speak English at that moment, you sometimes start to pronounce German words within this English speech english :D

[@minnesotamatt1980]

hahaha "TONY ROMO" lmao

[@smirks1463]

funny shit

[@barentobadry7537]

that got me dead

[@prankfiles]

Dirk could at least have corrected the butchered German sentence they wrote for him.

[@Elykism]

Think that's why Dirk said, "I don't know what you just said"

[@leaXmarc]

Elykism No not just Conan, what Dirk said himself actually didn't really make any sense :D

[@leemanstiles7790]

I see almost everywhere

[@dingdingdingdiiiiing]

"wie würde man die Öffentlichenvehrkerhsmittel einbezongen Wagen damit sie von diesen Teather zum AT&T Stadium"
"how would one public transportation including cars so that they from this theater to AT&T stadium"
nicely butchered, writers, nicely butchered

[@524rdsxfn]

Why did they speak German? It's Texas. Lol

[@YourFriendZay]

Dirk is such a classy guy

[@jsong21]

Dirk.. was fucking KILLER in that Finals against LBJ.

[@gop1386]

So much pride runs thru my heart when everyone claps and sings, "Deep in the Heart of Texas!"

[@Busster99]

I believe that there is a verb missing in Dirk's German sentence.

[@superkind333]

Everything is missing there^^

[@dr.petrus5975]

yeah he forgot to say gehen what means going to

[@ichbinnilsroth]

Ja haha

[@uk9383]

..kommen.

[@Editor_Hound]

Man, Dirk is comedy gold! Who would have known?

[@MisterFuturtastic]

I wish they had done one of those remote things where Conan goes around Texas with Dirk. Can't get enough Conan and Dirk.

[@pugilisticpablo7945]

that deep in the heart of texas song is DRILLED into your head as a kid when you grow up in Texas

[@mattblevins1983]

It's also played at every Texas Rangers game.

[@blakeb4583]

PugilisticPaul The stars at night are big and bright deep in the heart of Texas

[@bryansu5824]

So true

[@bryansu5824]

GuidoAnchovy B nah

[@bryansu5824]

GuidoAnchovy B nah, everyone did it before the 1800s in america tho

[@aldi404]

Ich glaub Dirk hat vergessen wie man deutsch spricht :)

[@hasdiof]

Ne

[@Strongpoint100]

haha hab ich auch grad gedacht xD

[@Matt87FY]

so ist das, wenn man 24/7 Englisch redet

[@Fazotronic]

er hat offensichtlich einfach gelesen was auf dem zettel steht.
wollte wahrscheinlich auch kein wirbel drum machen weil die ja ohnehin nichts kapieren

[@imdeadasssmacked]

Nein

[@unnamed5603]

in germany we call him "dirkules"

[@user-nq4sc4tg2r]

In Dallas we call him The greatest.

[@Airmaster167]

Crom f AKA The Goat

[@Stinger913]

Crom f legendary reply

[@ludgartzylinder5951]

Nein machen wir nicht

[@Brownalebelly]

@@ludgartzylinder5951 Doch, hab ich schon oft gehört.

[@rm9511a]

LMAO....Dirk played the bit very well.......even knew where to pause for the applause like a pro.

[@Paddl897]

And even when the sentence he read in German didn‘t even make sense in German😂

[@jair333]

I love when Conan clearly wrote most of the bit. It`s that sarcastic harvard humor of his. He did creat Mr. Burns after all.

[@Allagi22]

It case ya'll were wondering, Conan's German was straight gibberish. Dirk can obviously speak German but what he said was way odd I assume he was reading a cue card and not saying it how he would say normally say it. Plus he's been in America so long you do lose a bit of your mother tongue.

[@braydanleal5463]

ahepperl IT case you were wonder ?

[@danielrottlaender9101]

ahepperl Dirk hasn't lost any of his mother tongue tho.

[@theendurance]

@@danielrottlaender9101 he lost his father's tongue tho

[@sal9523]

Daniel Rottlaender like many “Americans” have ..

[@ariamentio]

Allagí he’s being a true Texan.

[@CanineGrowTime]

Dirks smile was adorable when Conan answered "Tony Romo". I love Dirk :)

[@timkrappmann5207]

When Dirk asks for directions to the stadium in German, he doesn't correct the errors in it. As a native speaker and fan of Dirk, I find that hilarious. Also, the way he says "Schnitzel" :D I think by now he's at the very least half Texan.

[@MrGekostyle]

Ouh man conan spreaks german like hitler xD

[@IchbinPeter.]

MrGekostyle Everyone here in Germany speaks like Hitler. Me, my Father, my Brother and my Mother. Normaly we say instant of Hello just NEIN! or BLITZKRIEG!

[@BoarhideGaming]

Yes..yes..our public transport is generally called "TRUPPENTRANSPORT JAWOHL!" And our supermarkets are colloquially know as "NAHRUNGSMITTELAUFRÜSTUNGSSTÄTTE!"

[@HDefinitionTV]

MrGekostyle "german"

[@gregsdiary537]

i'm german and i don't unterstand a single word he said..:D

[@Eiest]

+GregsDiary Ich verstehe nur Bahnhof

[@matthewleichter7184]

Dirk is a class act. My basketball idol and a great human being.

[@Jonidenk]

3:33 wie er einfach "und" sagt hahaha

[@optilusdncf6327]

TheFallingJon xD

[@srenaml3632]

I got this in my recommended 5 years later. Legend.

[@maxlen234]

I'm german and even nowitzkis question had some grammar mistakes. He probably didn't give a shit about the question xD

[@L00kiii64]

Nein er hat das einfach abgelesen, vom Blatt, er spricht perkekt Deutsch, so wie jeder andereDeutsche auch

[@LilysDream]

***** naja, es waren schon Fehler drin aber das ist nicht verwunderlich wenn man von einer zur anderen Sprache wechselt und sie (vielleicht) selten benutzt

[@aldi404]

*****
Jeder Deutsche spricht perfekt deutsch? Wirklich???

[@Anime4Life35]

"leading cause of heart attack in Texas"
"Tony Romo"
SO TRUE

[@burnonsports]

Anybody else wanna see Dirk play WR? or is that just me?

[@omarcorrea]

My favorite one was, which two foreign countries borders Texas; Mexico and the US. lol

[@eureka0521]

lol yeah as a texan that had me cracking up

[@imronburgundy7450]

eureka0521 As a Texan, I find nothing funny about factual information.

[@benholt06]

Dirk has such a great personality. I hope he’s involved with the Mavericks forever, and that I’m around to see both his sons don the Mav colors

[@NiVi192]

Wow I'm German myself, but I've been to the States several times and... well... R.E.S.P.E.K.T. DIRK! What a gorgeous English, hardly any accent!👍 Always again so impressive for me how he's made his way to the States, in several regards... I mean just the way the crowd started chearing when he stepped in. And still so kind and down to earth. Great guy, great personality!👑

[@MoTown-qd8fl]

+Vicky 12 We couldn't be happier to have someone like Dirk in our state. Thanks for letting us borrow him!

[@NiVi192]

+MoTown2112 Oh I didn't arrange it personally, but your very welcome! :)

[@tgms177]

Love it how the crowd went berserk when Dirk was announced

[@ChillinLikeAVillainn]

my nigga conan

[@SanskarWagley]

I live in Dallas/Fort Worth and double checked the public transportation directions. He was pretty much right.

[@thenotoriousdig610]

It’s always amazing to see how above average Conan is height wise.
Also, Dirk is the funniest player ever

[@mwyz]

Damn, I knew Conan was tall, but even standing next to Dirk Nowitzki, he didn't look short.

[@claudiatalbott111]

Conan's 6'4

[@locovel10]

when I was in Times Square, he walked right in front of me. He looked as tall as Dirk.

[@muffinman5741]

That german sentence from Dirk at the end was not grammatically legitimate sentence.

[@VinylUnboxings]

Neither was yours.

[@CNDvidsCTM]

Rekt rekt rekt

[@rummsdala]

+Jim Knopf It was actually complete rubbish and not even close to a German sentence :D

[@muffinman5741]

VinylUnboxings 111 likes?? Ok I forgot an "a" there, it's a typo ok! Relax!

[@kowa7616]

Everytime, when someone's trying to speak german in a TV Show, somewhere dies a Sauerkraut

[@MonicaChen]

Conan just sounds like he's yelling in gaelic.

[@paulmazur2116]

Haha, he probably is. I couldn't understand one word of what he said (and I'm german)

[@quipzz]

Paul Mazur
What Dirk said in German doesn't make any sense either :D
"Wie kommt man mit oeffentlichen Verkehrsmitteln von diesem Theater zum AT&T Stadion" would have been correct ;)
Very funny anyway :D

[@stephanieogaga7688]

IM SO IN LOVE WITH DIRKS ACCENT OMFG. It's sad, I've lived in Dallas my whole life and didn't know who founded it😂😂 This made me so happy and proud to be Texan! He would've really passed if he mentioned Whataburger or Football, or even George Straight, but as true Texan, I'd say Conan passed!

[@RRRRRRRRR33]

It's crazy how Conan have basically the same height of Dwyane Wade!

[@yourboble]

Conan should play in the celebrity basketball game for all star weekend

[@DreamWorldSyd]

You can't prove to me that Hakeem Olajuwon can't turn into a rocket.

[@omarcorrea]

that last pic was hilarious

[@prankfiles]

lol

[@alialahari4939]

Duy Nguyen لعب شهري

[@BobBobw]

German jesus

[@Finn-wm2no]

he cant even pronounce german words corretly

[@catsexual3412]

damn, so sassy.

[@Finn-wm2no]

MrBrenman21
wtf

[@leonbremer4216]

Some dude on the internet He can, that’s just scripted because it’s an scetch

[@peace4myheart]

Love Dirk. Such s humble and underrated player. Should have taken him to the Berlin trip. Yeah, I know the NBA season and all, but still, it would have been so much fun.

[@mistertrivedi]

That stab at Tony Romo though...

[@kobeisthegoat5767]

#CowboysSuck👎🏽👎🏽👎🏽👎🏽👎🏽👎🏽

[@Hege38]

This guy really should appear in more talkshows. Dirkules is on it!

[@scottgoulet1776]

One of my favorite skits ever. Funny as hell.

[@TheALyon8]

Wish I could have seen you in Dallas this week, Conan! Thanks for coming to Dallas and giving us some love! :)

[@halbwurm]

lol those nicknames! :-D

[@dadooddarren2116]

As a Texan, I have to wholeheartedly agree with you on the foreign countries question lmao

[@stefankarcher6396]

That's TV gold! Love that combination Dirk and Conan

[@MrBama214]

one of the best yet

[@geeganmj]

This is amazing. Grats to the writers and interns, along with Conan for the german rant lol.

[@stuckonautomatic]

Man, Dirk could at least have corrected the butchered German sentence they wrote for him. But then he probably thought of not offending the intern who pulled this off google translate. He's that nice. But good to finally see him in one of the talkshows.

[@towoawawaboofficial]

He answered with confidence like they were true @Conan is too fun

[@mikemathias1562]

I always come back to this 😂😂

[@MartinRizoComedy]

I've been to Texas and the number 1 thing I love from Texas is TACO CABANA!!!!

[@hartnessprintcentral2194]

All about that Whataburger man.

[@TayBee2012]

I'm pretty sure Braum's is also a winner...Dairy Queen...Taco Casa...If you've been to Wichita Falls or Vernon. And then every other place y'all have been in Texas just because of plain Texas Hospitality

[@MrBrainiac25]

Really? I live in San Antonio and I despise Taco Cabana

[@rajaa43]

Blake Campbell

[@hananehalil3272]

MrBrainiac25

[@JaySuschrist]

That was ridiculous! Oh, and hilarious. Thanks Conan!

[@TheLilpuertorican123]

Amazing video loved it

[@HooKsONyou]

a German asking a Canadian about Texas. love it lol #merica

[@jnguyen7639]

Sir Hooks Conan...isn't German. He's from Boston.

[@ryanscarington3844]

J Nguyen I sure hope you're kidding

[@jnguyen7639]

Ryan scarington I meant he's not Canadian.

[@ViableCalifornia]

Conan is from Boston.

[@siam9914]

Its murica

[@jccusell]

I'm guessing people from Texas appreciate Dirk Nowitzki

[@zachattack1965]

so much

[@hanj31]

When you say Dallas Mavericks great he’s the only guy you think of. When you look at other franchises like Lakers and Celtics they have many all time greats .

[@colby4181]

Just a bit

[@seansmith3147]

The Majestic!! Such an amazing and historic theater!

[@bltpork]

That crowd reaction for the second best power forward dirk was amazing

[@DiegoMartinPintos]

The greatest German-Texan Eva!!!!

[@CT-8024]

the only two things i know about Texas are it takes too fucking long to drive through Texas and i hate driving through Texas.

[@jherlenecargill4081]

Agreed. Lived there for a while and because of that I hate driving! I moved to Chicago where I don't have to drive.

[@CT-8024]

Jherlene Cargill Staten Island here, you have to take a ferry once in a while but really you dont need a car at all.

[@paulgeorge6629]

I live in texas and it takes 2 hours from houston to the beach lmao

[@CT-8024]

***** I'm from NY, so flat, barren nothingness with no signs of life for miles is kind of daunting.

[@inkL0sed]

Jaymzofsteel You must hate it upstate.

[@joshking1313]

I was there LIVE last night soooo much fun!

[@FedorMachida]

As a fellow Texan, I loved this. One of my fav. Conan bits.

[@JamesDavern12]

this was actually hilarious lmao

[@jg772006]

"What is the leading cause of heart attacks in Texas?" ...... "Tony Romo."
Bwahahahahahahahaha .... That absolutely cracked me up!!!

[@BostonRedSoxForever]

Damn funny stuff! Great job, Dirk & Conan!

[@overthetoppranks]

Dirk is amazing, Dallas will ALWAYS love you

[@thomasmuller1090]

7 foot Schnitzel pahahahahahahahaha HAMMER :)

[@KareezyG]

Finally a guy who makes Conan look normal in height.

[@kyleshiflet4915]

Love from Texas

[@mercypilar3596]

my all-time favorite.
love "DIRK".😍😍

[@music_by_carlos]

i mean ima spurs guy. but u gotta love dirk

[@Overdoseplus]

someone taller than Conan lol

[@jordanhiggins5860]

Two of my favorite people in this world

[@thegorn68]

This is awesome!

[@cyanidegaming7224]

The 7foot schnitzel 😂😂

[@carterbraun2564]

So many people were booing him in the beginning wtf

[@a-trainhighlights8565]

they were booing when he said the governor

[@Aycejay]

carter braun rockets fans

[@PatrickPrejusa]

I can't stop watching. This keeps cracking me up.

[@hanj31]

they love their troy aikmen and dirk nowitzki

[@themike97_58]

lol Tony Romo

[@Nhzharuthopar]

Greatest European born NBA player ever!

[@elfenbeindie2353]

Damn, im German and im so with Dirk when He Said He has No idea what the Moderator Just Said :D
Very funny and great Show!

[@Anabellaes1]

TX loves you, Dirk!!! 💕🏀👍

[@whatster8753]

I wish I could meet Conan before I die.

[@evanrangel8388]

They ignored the fuck out of the Houston Texans.. Lets face it, they are forgettable.

[@ernststavroblofeld1961]

+Hanks Minerals -- Houston is not in Texas. It is in Nasa.

[@evanrangel8388]

Ernst Stavro Blofeld I see what you did there..

[@luckybandit9758]

Shut your lame ass up H-Town shits on Dallas all day everyday.

[@eduardobalderas5124]

and they forgot The Houston Astros

[@kershawvalentine]

+Syed Ahmed Houston?lmao Houston? that humid sweaty sewer hole beats Dallas? lmao sure it does Akmed

[@illphil6627]

I see Dirk I smile and reminisce about 2011 🙌🏾

[@PatrickPrejusa]

whoever wrote conan's german line about collins to north collins, had to be from dfw and Arlington, it was so o point.

[@benediktwestphal6940]

4:17 Google-Übersetzer did a daamn good job here

[@Janinho897]

yeah, I don't even think that sentence had a verb ...

[@nashtydirkstynobli]

Dirk is my favourite human being

[@mattleonard5268]

Best video ever!

[@mrpankau]

James Harden, whose beard is wearing a Texas Rangers Jersey! lol

[@charlech]

oh shit, a guy taller than conan

[@isaacknight6987]

yeah kobe