He Didn't TRULY Love Me (Storytime) | Living in a Van
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- čas přidán 27. 08. 2024
- I decided to paint the inside of my van to renovate. This reminds me of a story of a time when I was married and it didn't work out. There was painting involved and I'm sharing the story.
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Was lonelier being married than I ever have since the divorce. When he said he couldn’t stand his mom and hated his sister I should have RAN as fast as I could but being in love… the only one in love in the relationship.. I over looked it naïvely thinking he would love me. Spent way too many years trying to work things out on my own. But I have an amazing daughter so will not mourn the years I grew from it and learned I was not the idiot he told me I was. I stand on my own feet and provide for myself. I am very happily single
Champion sister
Was lonelier being married too!
I was doing everything by myself anyway. He was never putting any energy into our ‘shared’ life.
His energy was into someone at his work. :/
It’s hard when anything ends but, there are smarter, brighter days ahead. ❤
@@doylejodi7502 sounds like we were married to the same type lol.
I'm in the same place. Been married 37 years. We are total opposites. LOL he does his thing, I do mine.
I always liked the dark blue cabinets:) Looks good with a different/contrast color next to the fridge. 💙
So many times we think of love as an emotion and a noun. But what is it in the sentence, "I love you," it's a verb. An action verb. I am patient with you. I am kind to you. I do not envy you...an so on. Also If a person loves me. That person is patient with me, is kind to me, is not envious of me... I was married once and thought we loved each other, but we didn't know what love was. That was almost forty years ago. I have since learned what love is and have found it in amazing friendships. I have also found that my relationship with my God, who really does love me, is all that I need. And love from my sons, their spouses, grandchildren, and friends is a bonus. Even as old as I am, I might find my true soulmate, that man that God has planned for me and me for him. I won't marry for anything less than that because I don't need a romantic relationship--it is a bonus. Thank you, Allison for being transparent and sharing what love is with us.
I am so glad I found your channel. I think I was meant to hear what you have to say. Thank you ❤
Small white sponge rollers are the best for cupboards and most surfaces.
Allison, you are so right! I loved my husband so much, and i believe he loved me. However spiritual we were on different planets. Our marriage was rocky for over 10 years until he passed away. 20 years devoted to him.
Yes take time to not be unevenly yoked it saves time in the long run . If not it's all wasted time with the wrong person . Better to be alone then with the wrong person . God Bless !!!
Thank you for sharing this part of your life, and for being helpful to others. You make a big difference in people's lives. Now switching gears...maybe use your white as a primer, sand it down, and find the color you like better. maybe use a small roller too. I just want to come and help you paint, I wish I could!
I would also recommend highly that you use a foam roller on the final coat.
Good tip, thanks!
Amen! How they are before marriage is the best you’ll get from them. Be equally yoked!
Thank you for sharing. I recently had a friend breakup and a sister breakup. I discovered that I didn't like myself when I was around either of them. I gave it a test and let a month go by without seeing either of them to make sure I felt what I felt. I have built myself a peaceful life after decades of chaos. After seeing each of them after the month it was confirmed that they were toxic to me. I immediately was stressed, negative, angry over nothing and just awful. It was bizarre because when I got out of their presence I felt lighter. It's hard to acknowledge that some people are just wrong for you and let them leave your life but worth it in the end.
I relate to this comment so much! It's hard to go through but I'm glad you are more at peace. Thank you for sharing this and Stay blessed!
Sucks when that happens both in the paint colour and relationships, I get lonely too and depressed so I know exactly how you feel. But life alone is better than lonely with someone.
Can't wait to to see the finished paint, and yes it's too white you want it different to the fridge 😊😊
I'm not big on sweet tea but, I love Mcalister's food.
I used to paint professionally. The one thing I would never do is buy cheap paint. I mainly only use Benjamin Moore. I'll use Kelly Moore if Benjamin Moore isn't available. Semigloss is the best choice for kitchen cabinets as it's the most washable. A foam roller works better than a standard roller to give you a nice finish. One other trick I use is that if I am painting something that needs primer, I get the primer tinted with the finish color. Primer is cheaper than paint, and you'll need fewer coats of the finish paint if the primer is tinted. They add the tint for free. In areas with moisture, I'll buy a little packet of the anti-mold stuff and have them mix it into the paint. In houses, I do this in the bathroom, but in a van, I would add it to all my paint. I always use a paint bucket and screen because paint pans are awful. You can't get the paint evenly distributed on the roller. The pans are also a nightmare to carry around and they tip over easily. The best paint brushes are Purdy or Wooster. It's worth it. I clean mine, spin them out and put them back in the sleeve and they last me for years.
I've been in a 24 Year relationship that has beaten me down so badly that I've just been waiting to die. You have helped rally me. In the 50's and 60's men accused women of wanting to marry as if being a wife was an easy way of life. That social vernacular has turned 180 degrees. Men want what they can get from a marriage and then they want out.
It is what women were originally accused of over half a century ago.
I'm a Bible Believer, Christ follower, so I've been waiting on the Lord to correct somethings here, but I've come to the conclusion that this marriage was a lie from the beginning. It sounds like your marriage was a lie too. it is a compliment to both of us. Men saw strength in us. That brings me to a BIG Thank You for your video!! You have given me renewed strength. I'm proud of you. And btw, I wish that I could help you paint too.
This is just what I needed to hear today. I was having a bit of a pity party because I'm on a road trip feeling lonely but it is solvable. Thanks for reminding me of that distinction - so wise.
Hello, hope this helps…favorite music, from upbeat to soothing mellow, put your shades on and enjoy the ride while you think happy thoughts and smile! I left a marriage after 43 years because I was lonely with someone who refused to accept I had value. He was kind and thoughtful to everyone but me. I was a dying vine that he gave no attention. Short story… you gotta love you more than you love somebody that gives you no value in their life. I took my faith in God and the strength built up from “ENOUGH”, and dipped. Seven years later, and headed to mid 70’s, I’m still alone, but not with someone holding space for no reason. See it could be worse, you’re not old like me…LIVE your best life, and let no one take you down. As for me, prayer and my faith got me through. 🤗🤗🤗 My best for you, my friend…😎
Find some nomad groups to meet up with maybe quartzite would be a good place for you if possible this time of year ❤
Yeah you just want a bit more contrast! I think a light khaki or something would look super nice and warm it up a bit too with the right shade.
I totally agree!
Thanks again for these personal conversations. Allison, you always cheer me up. 😊
Don’t let your paint freeze! Works best in warmer temps. I’m sure you’ve done your research. Good to see you again.
I've followed you for quite some time and I love all your videos...I don't think I have ever commented before....BUT this SPOKE to my Heart. I can relate and I have been there. Loneliness SUCKS especially when you are with someone and still feel alone....or when you feel your friends and sometimes family just don't get YOU anymore. It is truly a crazy space to be in. In this loneliness for me this time I feel like I am discovering myself again and although it is scary and sometimes can feel more depressing. Growing Pains are worth it. Thank you for sharing!! 🤗🙏
Wow…same here, married over 40 years and lonely. He ignored me. I left, and have been by myself for 7 years. It’s good one day at a time…🤗
@@olgaharris1103 Good for you deciding to take care of yourself...it is hard but 1 foot in front of the other...right? 🙏
Exactly what I needed to hear. I'm dealing with this as well, thank you for sharing!!
I love the paint. It bright and should be a mood booster.
Love ya Alison! Great to hear your story. Ah paint is 90% prep...good brush, primer, sanding, tape, plastic. I'm going to paint my minivan subfloor and add a stencil (but first overall layout and cut storage hatches so it'll be a while). My fav color is sage green. You'll get it, you know how to persevere with many projects so far.
First, AHHH McAllister’s! I miss that place so much!
Secondly, I’m sorry you’re struggling with some depression and loneliness. Sending good vibes to you.
Third, i can’t remember who said this, but pint sized love will never fill a gallon. You have to find your gallon sized people.
Lastly, what Paul was talking about in addressing the church at Corinth was all-encompassing love, not just romantic love. We can do great things, but if we do them without love we are nothing/have nothing. The greatest command, after loving God, is to love one another. Love is not just a feeling, it is an action, just as Paul described in his letters. Patience, kindness, not envious, not boastful, etc. That is how we are to treat each other. I feel like the real message here is lost on a lot of people.
I wish you joy. I wish you peace. And I wish you love.☮️💖
-Hippie
I love McAllisters Allison I found it when my daughter lived in Dallas and I went to visit I was addicted to the tomato cucumber salad!! 🤩🤪
I love what you said! Love never fails, but people fail to love!! There needs to be some serious consideration when choosing a person to give our love. Am I attracted to this person because of programming as a child ? He’s like my dad who was stern, closed off emotionally due to his own childhood? SO SO SO important to look at the family dynamics of the person! I mean, you’re usually going to “ marry” your mom or your dad 😳 If you’re attracted to the wrong kind of person, GET HELP for yourself BEFORE getting into a relationship! Also, remember, marriage isn’t a cure for a person with problems. Just the opposite! Magnify their faults times 10 ! I don’t care HOW attracted you are to the person! DO NOT IGNORE THE WARNING SIGNS! I’m talking as someone who’s been there, done that and would give anything to have a second chance at a first go around 🥹 PS I love your hair length Allison! It’s PERFECT 🤩
(((((((( hugs)))))))))
Next time you’re painting and pondering on this memory focus on what you have just done … you painted / wrote your heart-ache in paint … and then painted OVER IT …. You created. NEW CANVAS to begin a new story.
❤ positive stuff ❤
Ooooo McAllister's is so good. I like the roast beef dip and hubby does the Southwest chicken. They have good potato salad.
Thank you for your point of view.1
You're so right. Love never fails. People fail to love. I think I'm going to print that on a t-shirt.
❤❤❤ relationships are a lot of work ❤❤❤
Thank you for this. I divorced in Dec after 32 years. The loneliness is real issue for me. But you are right about loneliness when you are married is even worse than loneliness without someone.
I don't like yellow walls either! I did yellow in my kithcen once and I hated it. I repainted it Orange and loved the Orange.
I do like creamy colors. My last house had a lot of Montgomery White. The house I kive in now has a color called Sundial. Blue is a tough color to find the shade you want. Green is my favorite. We painted our 1900 Farmhouse Georgian Green. In our house we have Georgian Brick in the pantry, study, and as an accent wall in the master.
I think I might do Georgian Green in my kitchen on my van build.
You put a smile on my face
Thank you Allison. Love never fails, people fail to love. Yes, 1st Corinthians 13 is deep. Every time I read it I get another perspective. You are never alone with Jesus Christ. He says that he will never leave you, or forsake you.
Hi Allison, I'm a new subscriber and I just watched this video. Is is SO very refreshing to hear another woman be so REAL about God's Word and His demand to be patient, kind, gentle, etc. in a marriage, and any other relationship! I am married, 41 years and STILL very lonely. Thank you for your insight! You made me "exhale"! My few lady friends who are married, are not Christians, so they cannot understand my feelings. Again, thank you Allison! Peace and blessings! Be safe always!
I’m 💯 with you on yellow walls. My first apartment solo was all canary yellow - walls, ceiling, the outside building. It was like living inside the sun 24/7, literally because it was above a restaurant kitchen and the oven heat would rise into my space. It’s not only not cheery but it’s impossible to decorate around. Yellow paint should only be sold in pint sized cans. 😂
Thank you for sharing your story. Have you watched Peter Santenello? You may enjoy his content. Live/ love that nomadic life, girl!
my husband and I can totally relate to you about making sure you connect with healthy people. We had to dis connect from some family members and friends because they are narcissists. Its sad but we are MUCH happier and at peace now that we use our boundaries
Just came across your video all I can say is thank you I needed this GOD will always and send a message you need
Living my dream❤
Stuck in a house I do not even want to be in 😢
Want a home alone like yours❤❤❤❤
FYI - McAllisters chicken salad on croissant is delicious!
The day I got married I knew what kind of man he was . I stayed for 14 years !
Been there too - 22 years. So, naive.😢❤
Sis making regret leaving my last town without stopping at MCAlister first! 😭
Oh well, maybe next time.
Also yellow is a morning color. Great for kitchens, bathrooms, or living rooms. But not for bedrooms. You can’t rest in that. The only color that is worse is red.
Lol . I love how nice you were to the bee. I could never be that nice. I would’ve got stung. 😂
I love how you are being patient with the cabinets put if love. They will probably treat you better than your ex ever did. 😊
Enjoy watching your videos ❤ Thank you for being you and being real ❤ You are so inspiring ❤
Thank you so much!!
At least you have a good primer laid down good
Luck on the painting and in life!🙏🏼👊🏼👌🏼
Self centeredness and character defects built by my own ego and the lies most of us grew up with seamed to have totally sabotaged all my relationships. Changed to a more God centered Jesus Christ believer life. Most of why I started listening to this channel. Positivity and truth. Thanks for your stories.
Yes things we've learned in our younger years can be a major issue. I'm glad you are focusing more on God's way. Thanks for watching and sharing your experience!
Can I be brutally honest?
I like the blue better. But thats just me!! 😅
Love you! Hope to meet someday.
Yes of course! I love the honesty. I like the blue too but I'm just ready for a change. Love back to ya!
I really enjoyed this video! Thank you for sharing! 💜
I’ve been happily married for 24 years, and while we entered marriage equally yoked, our walks with the Lord have differed at times. This, of course, tried our relationship with each other. However, after all these years I couldn’t imagine having done it any different! 💜✝️
Oh, and I love the movie Elf! 😉
Allison I'm kinda like you I love gray cloudy skies I had a marriage with this woman I thought she was the one God put on this earth for me we was married for 13 years then she cheated on me and I started battling with depression anxiety PTSD and other mental health issues and other mental health issues I believed in God and she didn't and ever since I got a divorce from her my mental health issues got worse but God pulled me threw it I hope your painting goes well for you
So sorry to hear about your unhappiness with your X. It seems like you really tried to make it work. I have been married Three times and the Third Time was the charm. My husband is my best friend and I would rather be with him than anyone else fortunately he feels the same way. His love in God and family is amazing. My Mom told me if I didn’t marry him she would. Can’t beat that.
There is someone out there for you. Stay strong. I have enjoyed your video. Oh, we have been married for 45 years now and I wouldn’t change it for anything.
Thank you for sharing your story Allison. Thankfully I'm over and past my heartbreak of seven years. My reconciliation came just a few months. There's nothing worse than unrequited love. I loved him but he didn't lovecme back. I, like alot of people thought that he would suddenly fall in love with me and we would live happily after after. He told me who he was early on but I let it cause me a very bad time in my life. With praying and listening to God, I finally accepted it. I'm good now but I must say that I've been somewhat of a loner. I know who I am, I like being alone and loneliness isn't a big problem for me. What you said is so true and resonated with me. You are such a great person and if you want love in your life, you will find it. I'm so glad your back!! BTW, I think a beige color would look great in your van! Be safe dear one. You are loved.❤ XXXX
You are so right. You have to have the same religious values, and try to live by God's law, for a relationship to work. You are going to face difficulties in day to day life, but both partners, have true love. Like you quoted the Bible, Love is patience, love is unselfish, all the things quoted in the Bible. Also I went thru depression, I have read alot of therapist's save if you prefer rainy and cloudy days instead of sunshine can mean, not always, but can mean you are depressed. I got over my depression. Wish you a blessed life God Bless😊
@@joycook1191 ❤️
Love the bloopers!
Glad you like them!
First things first! Yellow & red make you hungry… Those are definitely the wrong choices of paint to use! 😂 Lastly, I hear you on the marriage thing! I think my husband decided to marry me for the convenience… Someone to cook, clean & so on! I’ve been married almost 11 years & mostly to myself… His life is drinking, now drugs & it’s always..Mommy, mommy & MOMMY! The facts are.. You can’t change someone that doesn’t want to change or help themselves! You never can & never will! It will take time to realize the most important thing.. why would you want to change someone that obviously doesn’t want to change?!! I realized long ago that he doesn’t even love himself, so it’s impossible for him to ever love me!!
I miss the bloopers 😂 thanks
Palais is french. It's pronounced PA-LAY. 🙂
I like the white. It immediately opened up the space. Looks bigger.
Good evening my friend! Yes, I have had a similar first marriage. The Bible says that believers should not be yoked with non believers and that was the biggest mistake of mine. Or so I found out later. The problem is that my first wife lied to me about her faith in God, rather her lack of faith and her hidden hatred of Christianity. Her true reason for leading me on was because her parents expected her to give them grandchildren. She would do anything they wanted her to do. She was from the Philippines, from a very family oriented culture. The problem was that meant her blood relatives, not myself or my family who she looked down on because we were white Americans, not Filipinos. Was she that desperate to have a grandchild for her parents that she roped me into marrying her? Perhaps. It didn’t help that I hadn’t dated much before I met her and I was too inexperienced to see the warning signs. Anyway we had a son, our only child, early in our marriage. It was a horrible marriage and she didn’t really want to give our son the nurturing that he deserved. 13 years later we were in divorce court. If it wasn’t for our son I would have been gone long before that. I left California after that at the age of 40 and moved to Washington, that was 20 years ago. 17 years ago I met my second and current wife Raya. We’re both Christians as we should be. We couldn’t have been brought together without God, especially that I live in Washington and she was living in Kentucky. Praise God and thank you for the internet! We’ll never be lonely again. And so my friend, God has a plan for you as well. One day it’ll be revealed to you. You’re a loved and cherished child of God. Nobody can ever take that away from you. Amen✝️
I like Mcalisters. We had one in Colorsdo. I used to go there now and then.
Lots of truth you're sharing.
When I was married it was abusive and lonely and made me feel non-existent. I am so much happier now and if/when I get lonely, I know it is normal but I feel present. Love yourself and be patient and kind to yourself. It is truly wonderful to feel fulfilled all by oneself.😊❤
I love the MacAlisters in Slidell, La. Tea is good and the chicken salad on a croissant is delicious!!
Give it another try.....😉 o and chocolate chip cookies are yummy!!!!
Told you to use a muted lite green🤷🏾♀️
I think you shouldn’t be alone so much I do enjoy being alone but I think you shouldn’t be alone just my personal opinion and observation
Enjoyed the video. Thanks for sharing. Bloopers 😂😂. Be careful stay safe and God bless 😊
Thank you! You too!
Thank you for this video! I love it and you and all your stories that you share. You're so inspirational and encouraging, such a joy ❤❤❤ Blessings to you !
I think you're paintjob look's good allison. And I do agree being with someone and still feeling lonely is a very bad feeling. Praying for you and looking forward to the next episode
🗣🗣I feel you on the yellow walls…🤣🤣🤣🤣
Right!??? I just can’t!
You should do a light sanding, wipe it down, then do light layers at least 2, also be careful you should pull the drawers out and prop the doors slightly open so you don't paint them shut, and buy a good brush it does make a difference just clean it well.
Braveheart
I didn't like mccallisters when I tried it. What I got reminded me of hospital cafeteria 😂
Bee 🐝 gone wild 😹😹😹
Sometimes your best years of your life have already been lived.
Agreed
I've been with someone over 16 years. I've never been married. Because of this, if we split, I will have nothing.
McAlisters are all over Texas. Great deli.
I enjoy your video im happy to hear your bibical refwrences and talking about God thats great
I LOVE McAlesters sweet tea! But I have mine with lots of lemon
Most people have one suitcase packed under the bed to walk out the door when it comes to relationships !
Hi Allison Sharpe, Happy New Year.
Great video!
Maybe you can get some new swatches, hold them against the newly painted areas & find a color you really like 🤔/❤️✝️🙏/ Thank You For Sharing 🤗👍 Great video 🙂
McAllister has good sweet tea, but Comments would not let me add's. I wasn't thrilled that there is no coffee after 12:00 pm. Don't you feel happier with your life at this time?
McAalester tea is great. I mix mine sweet andnooot sweet.
I just found your CZcams a thing and I want to say ah your hair looks pretty and shiny so I'm going to watch your videos cuz I think I could relate to this
There’s Mcalister’s deli in Charlotte. They’re on point!
Niiice!
Well the good news is your hair looks great and your van set up is super cute. Hugs❤
Thank you! 🤗
All sweet teas in Texas are big lol
If you have a color other than white (blue, red....etc.) White paint is very hard to go back to. It's just too bland.
Several times I've been only 1 in love you not only woman been thru this you want be the last you are smart now lady happy to
❤❤❤
Elf!
Yesssssssss 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Bro!!! Lol 😉 Trust your gut. How old are your kids? What state do they live? Where are you headed?
I married someone I thought loved me like I loved him only to find out his love was not real. It led to my early mid life crisis and caused me to find Jesus so win/win 😁 never settle just because you want to get married or have kids.
I love you snacks ❤️
Why haven’t you drivin someplace warm for the winter?
Do you get SSI? How do you afford to live in your van?
I’ve never been to the Carolinas? What are the pros and cons?
That story was all frame, no picture... details?
YOU are STRANGE!