I have a Cadillac with the exact same thing (of oh it just works) It's got a bunch of fancy shit I suppose, but it's not critical to the functionality of the car.
It's possible with a $20 cable and 2 minutes of searching online for software... though not through official BMW sources, which does make your point valid if you ignore anything that's not official BMW.
Why just dont put the battery reset function into the settings menu in the Infotainment System? German car builders are extremely stupid when it comes to electronics. They just can Hammer iron and Do like they did something demanding
@@johnathankrausrig9237 yes, they could simply allow the customer to reset it for free without a scanning machine. They don't like their customers. For that reason, I'll not buy from them. Companies who hate their customers don't deserve to have their customers
I have a Ford Edge with a four year old battery from Autozone. I installed it by taking the old one off and putting the new one on. Life is good. Keep it that way
Not… really? But ok lol. Couple more plastics covering the shit, but “ridiculous” like, “these 3 extra minutes are killing me” or “shit I broke a nail removing one of these panels” ridiculous?
this shit actually safes you money. I replaced the battery on my wifes car for the first time last year and it was buiult in 2006. i had an e60 an e92 which both had the original battery in it.
@warguy6474 the alternator literally charges the battery when the engines running, maintaining 13-15 volts which Is above the available voltage during a cold start. Increasing the output of an alternator does not increase the lifespan of a battery which is already around 4 years.... As a mechanic, I can say German engineering solves alot of nonexistent problems
Are you restarted? We know when a battery depletes the voltage drops. The battery is fuckin charged by the alternator constantly when the engine is running so the battery will not drop below 11-12volts unless the battery is loaded while the engine is not on. If for deplete you meant as the battery ‘gets old’, that’s not true. The base voltage always remain 12v, but the battery will loose the ability to store current as it did when new (ence it lose the amount of current it’s able to store)
@6474 So you add simple 10$ voltage regulator and all electronics can have 100% proper voltage even if battery goes below 12V... So simple solution, that does not cost anyone to visit shop for simple battery change... But where is BMW money in that?
@@Plackomiot I was having a discussion with a mate of mine about the what or how long is "sealed for life" meant to be. Regarding BM auto transmissions. We determined 3 years.. Rinse and repeat. The manufacturers don't intend on you owning a car for longer than the warranty period. Obviously people run cars for longer decades even. This is here stealerships make their money.....ker-ching!
With all those sensitive electronics you would think they would be able to monitor the condition of ANY battery installed and charge it accordingly. Especially since that technology has been around for a long time.
The reason given in the video is not correct, as you state, voltage regulation has been in alternators for decades. The real reason is that those early BMWs were some of the first vehicles to have smart charging based on temperature, battery age, auxilary load etc. a new battery can be allowed to run without alternator output for a while to allow the voltage to cycle and prevent sulphation of the plates. This is why the first batteries in these cars could last up to 10 years in some cases. As the battery ages, it is less reliable and the duty cycle of the alternator will increase to ensure battery reliability. When you fit a new battery, you tell the car it can resume its smart charging strategy. In the case given, id put the short battery life down to vehicle usage or battery quality.
@joshbridges8410 but the modules should be able to run tests to determine battery condition. All you have to do is a load test. The engineers know exactly how many amps the starter needs and what that draw is on a new battery. Program that into the module and see what the battery shows during cranking. Boom no need to reset the battery life.
Actually 🤓. Theres jump terminals under the hood on most all cars even if the battery is in the back. Some cars also cannot be jumped by there so the terminals are used to pop electronic trunks to access the battery. Bmw can be jumped under the hood tho. Or just get a car with a manual transmission and use the old school push to start.
I'm an electrical engineer. While I was in school I worked closely with battery management systems, different battery, chemistries, battery, life cycles, and more. Was through both involvement in undergraduate research and an electric vehicle competition team. It makes absolutely no sense to increase charge current into a lead acid battery later in its life cycle. It literally serves no function. I would love to hear what justification that BMW engineers had for increasing the charge. Current, float voltage, or any other charging parameters for age.
Not increasing charge current for the battery. Increasing alternator output for the high peak load electronics when the battery is no longer able to cover those current swings. Even so, you'd think they'd be able to develop some sort of monitoring system to detect current droop and increase the power to the field coils on demand, rather than just increasing the alternator output over time. 30 seconds of thought: a big capacitor held over the required voltage, kept charged by the battery. Monitor the recharge transient time. Takes longer than expected? Maybe the battery is getting old. Was taking a long time, suddenly back to normal? Must be a new battery.
I found on a german forum: When the Battery is new the car completly disables the alternator when the car injects fuel. this funktion will be reduced in some steps when the battery gets older. additional the battery will be charged shorter and then switched to uphold voltage (maybe wrong translated) its done to deaccalarte the lead sulfate dismantling (maybe wrong trans) and fuel efficience. additional BMW same says its not necessarily when you change to the same Type. On originals BMW software you can change from AGM to Lead and the AH
and i want to say it works. i changerd the battery on my wifes car last year. its a 2006 120d with the original bat. I had a e60 530D and a e92 335i all original Bat. While my accord CU3 needet after 9 years a replacement and there was already a aftermarket bat. the 2011 CRV from my dad had the second Battery. and the Jetta Mk4 1.9tdi needed 2 from 2012
@@russia4ever325makes sense. My car has a smart alternator, where the ECU turns off the alternator as much as possible. An old battery would cause wild voltage swings, with the stalling and losing power if the battery is completely shot.
I’m an electrical engineer. This was something BMW could have avoided. There are MANY electronics components and solutions designed to solve problems exactly like this in low voltage DC applications with a variable source. Voltage regulators, Low drop out regulators, diodes, relays, and even basic transistor logic can all be used to keep a circuit functional under battery drain, and help to isolate/protect the circuit should the battery voltage fall too low to function anymore. There are common well trodden roads for protecting devices from under voltage situations. This situation occurred from either laziness or malice, or some nasty combination of the two.
@@hacatan24 This is the reality of owning these German cars. You pay a hefty maintenance price. For a honda you probably pay significantly lower to do the same job!
@@10RBREEZY Yup. Last time I changed the battery on my Honda, it was $100 and done in 15 minutes. Most of that time was screwing around finding the right tools in my garage!
@@nam3go3sh3r3 I give credit to BMW for their engine performance. But why *OVER COMPLICATE* the rest of the car? Battery replaced? You need to recalibrate. You want to reset the service interval? Get a OBD device or service it at our dealership. And the most egregious and recent thing: You want heated seats? Better fcking pay for that as a separate subscription EVERY MONTH!
Very simple solution. Program the computer to monitor the battery voltage, temperature, current and charging voltage to determine the health of the battery. Display a warning when sustained charging current becomes too high indicating a dying battery. Engineer modules to withstand a larger voltage variation.
@@ts757arse im giving you a like because "dogshit" has been a word I've used in explaining dog shit things for decades now..and, probably, like myself, you could give a fuck less about a like..so I apologize in advance..
It's all false. It's got nothing to do with anything he said. It's for start/stop, if you don't code the battery replacement all you will notice is start stop carries on not working. That is it..
@@readmore7180 if it is like in VAG cars then there is more to it than just start stop. It regulates the charge the battery is given. Had my battery replaced once and the programming for some reason didn't succeed. After a year i had problems starting when my car was parked just for a few days. Visited the shop again, they noticed that the programming wasn't right and fixed it so now everything is back to normal. Funny that the technician in the video stated they had to replace the battery just after a year, probably unnecessary.
This video just saved our lives literally. So the homies grandpa is missing right now and it's like 3 a.m. and we were thirsty and stopped to get some drinks. So while we're kicking back drinking some dude pulled up to the window trying to rob us but we're so so engaged with the dynamics of the video leaned in and tried Rob us but since we didn't notice and kind of ignored him he walked away. Thank you.
It's a lot easier to replace BMW convertible batteries if you put the convertible top in the 3/4 position. The hydrologics lock and it won't collapse when you disconnect the battery but I still always put a hood prop in there to make sure I don't get crushed but it makes doing it 100x easier. You can lift the battery straight up and out.
And the worst part is this problem still continues to this day on some mini vehicles but thankfully not the newer bmw hybrids. Imagine frying your electronics just because you changed the battery
If you got an actual German BMW you would find it would be a lot different than the US counterparts and much better car and every way shape or form that goes with all German vehicles that sell over here they don't have to meet the same quality selling in the United States
@@jeep1987 it's the 2002 7 series E65 It was built was only built in BMW's Dingolfing factory in Germany, and the thing with the battery is a design flaw in the first place, nothing to do with manufacturing
@@jeep1987 not true. My 2013 750Li was a true German made car and it was a complete pile of trash. The motor let go on the highway and after the engine was replaced by BMW it got a low oil level light just a week after. BMW builds nothing but trash. If you want a good European made vehicle, buy an Audi.
Common place now. I've had to program a vw passat. Most cars now you can't even change the rear brake pads without a good reader that can make the handbrake rewind itself.
Everyone else: let's use voltage regulators and switching power supplies to solve this common electronics problem. BMW: let's just leave a bunch of unregulated loads on the battery, and force them to pay close attention to it.
@BumbleBee it may be technically cheaper to do it the BMW way, but in practice it makes the cost of maintenance neglect much higher, and most cars have neglected maintenance at some point in their lifecycle.
@BumbleBee never had a car that you could fill the battery with distilled water, but I had bikes with it and I swear those last a lot longer. Any problem? Just fill it up and give it a proper charge on a good wall charger and off it goes for another year (our lows are 2-3°C
The engineers where so damn caregiving that they developed a specific "bmu" instead of fixing the problem on the board. Angels from the God of mechanics and electronics
That's a great idea, and that's the problem, it's a great idea. Unlike the N55's (and others) 3 part crank hub. You'd think it would save them money and mass if it were a single part, but nope easier timing of engine as they laugh while the car leaves the building.
FYI, the battery registration history is reset with a software update so a history showing no replacement may not mean it's never been registered. It may have had a software update.
So I’m confused why you have so little likes, maybe the sensitive ones are salty for being called out, or no one heard it…. Couldn’t stop laughing when I heard it 🤣
M not able to do can u explain how can i do because i installed new battery now car says starting navigation got stuck on this message and music is not working
Wow now it all makes sense , I was trying to change my aunts battery in her bmw and those issues you explained kept happening since I didn’t register the battery 🤯
@@minimalisticmime5459 you can pick up one of these offline for like 80 bucks it’s a high end bmw so they knew it would be something a expensive mechanic or DIYer woikd work on but now you can get these scanners for 100 or so bucks cheaper then most toolboxes
When I change the ink on my printer, it asks me, "Did you change the ink?" I select "Yes," the ink meter is full, and that's all there is to it. I did not need to take my printer to the dealer.
@@LordSandwichII It's not just the sensor in the cartridge for sensing the ink level, but an EPROM that will contain an identifier, so the printer knows to refuse it if it's not recognized. They may even maliciously install a page counter into that EPROM to prevent it from being refilled after the page count has been reached. The manufacturers always say that this is for quality control and to avoid damage from non-standard consumables, but the REAL motive is, of course, so that the company may make as much money as possible. I had a colour laser printer once, that had page counters on the EPROMs of those toner cartridges, which would count down even if printing in b/w. I had to build an interface to reset the page counter on those cartridges, so I could get my money's worth of those cartridges. Very annoying.
But...how does that ensure a profit stream at the printer dealer's service center? If you did have to take it to the service center, they'd be able to offer you all sorts of other services that you didn't know you needed AND charge you for the ink replacement.
@@Texas240 As somebody who's had to take apart and service these printers, I highly doubt it. And while I'm always happy to pick up tips and tricks from somebody who's been doing it longer and knows better, I'm competent enough of a mechanic to know when I'm being fucking scammed.
Wow, such a high tech vehicle and it's dumb when it comes to charging. Overcharging also will cook an Alternator. I'm guessing you have to reset the oil sensor too when you change oil.
As a BMW/mini technician myself you don’t have to reset the oil sensor it does it by itself you do have to reset the oil change light tho just to let the car know the oil has been changed like any other car
Oh yeah resetting an oci ight is super high-tech I got to do it all the time in my 2013 base model Corolla. And let me tell you it takes all of an agonizing 4 seconds
@@ClumsyCars no. It's not that simple. It's like saying oh, I can control this water level with this lever and not installing a float switch that does it automatically. Hows it going to regulate if it doesn't know what to regulate? A new battery needs less amperage to achieve the same charge as am older battery. If you tell the regulator to charge a new battery like it would an old battery you over heat the new battery. Voltage and amperage are not the same.
@@magincap70 automotive batteries have standardized voltages. This problem is easily solved by using a coulomb counting shunt. The only situation in which such a shunt will lose count is when a battery is replaced or completely depleted to flat. In either case it will be replaced or need to be replaced and is easily inferred that remeasuring the battery should take place. This is a disgusting conspiracy from a bloated pig of a car company to get you to buy specialized tooling because mechanics aren't technically inclined to know better. This was engineered to pay dividends to BMW, not engineered to be repairable or end user serviceable and any attempt to claim otherwise is just huffing copium.
@@DingleFlop call up bmw and tell them how to do it better then. You act like it's some expensive procedure. You can buy a $30 scan tool that will do this that doesn't pay bmw a thing. Volts and amperage are not the same thing. I can test a battery and it be at 12.6 volts and it won't start the car because it can't provide the amps. The only time a shunt won't work is when a battery is replaced? That's when you register a new battery. After you replace it. Fuck.
Dumb AF of a design. At least make it user friendly to reset the counter. That's bad engineering when you have to see a stupid mechanic every you change a battery.
Correct me if im wrong. Batteries need a lower alternator charging voltage as they get older because they will offgass with too high of a voltage when charging.
@@t4rbrah899 yeah they’re specifically targeting people like you though, shit isn’t simple anymore and you can do a lot of damage because of these types of things
So you literally tell us, BMW hasn’t figured out how DC/DC converters and Voltage stabilizers work… But they can tell a alternator to simply charge with higher voltages with time… (doesn’t sound right to me)
I learned this the hard way, had my battery replaced and the shop didn’t reprogram it, later found that the plastic unit on top of the battery was partially melted as it must’ve shorted 💀
Batteries needing to be registered is more and more common these days. My 2014 Peugeot 308 needs to have the battery registered because of the Stop/Start that has never worked. I had to get someone to install my battery because it's tucked away right at the back of the engine bay which makes it difficult to get to and it's a time consuming procedure to register a new battery. In my previous cars, I could just swap the battery out without needing to do anything with the exception of my VW Golf. I had to turn the wheel all the way to the left, all the way to the right and it just worked.
Did he though? Cause all the Karens I see are not very youthfull. And all the social studies professors that are making the youth sensitive along with other influential people are not young either
@@HoloScope i know its a bad example but imo the youth today (in america specifically) seem to have their feelings crushed by nothing and wanna cancel everything. Atleast it seems like it
I knew this response would be at the top of the comment thread. I might have been a 80’s baby and an 80’s/90’s kid (i resent the millennial categorization), but we rubbed some dirt on it, and sucked it up buttercup, cuz there’s no crying in baseball!
Yeah, I fixed a Mini no-charge fault by *disconnecting the alternator from the network* once. And it doesn't prevent overvolting damage, it diminishes alternator output over time to extend the life of the battery and also to temporarily shut down the alternator for a small horsepower increase when you floor it. It is ridiculously over-engineered for no reason. There was absolutely no need to add another independent network to do what nobody asked for; just to increase the number of failure points.
‘Electronics sensitive to voltage range’ Lol my audi’s voltage pulses constantly between 11 and 14v at idle, it’s so bad you can see the headlights and tail lights flashing from outside the car. Maybe I should start to be concerned..
No, modern electronics are safe enough, they could run aswell on 5 or even 24V Its only a scam from BMW so you buy the battery from them aswell as the unnecessary reset of the softwate
Yeeaaaahhhhh...... my love for BMW especially as a favourite over the mercedes, just plummeted. It was hearing about how difficult those things are to maintain outside of the mechanic's involvement. I didn't even know little things like this needed to be so complicated. 😂
Actually it does not fry the battery... But it's for the car to have like a baseline of the Voltage Levels that are possible and not damaging for the battery so for example if it's really low the car can tell you to start the motor! (Those BMWs already did that by a check control code)
@@dimitrijekrstic7567 sensitive European electronics that cook themselves, we heard the video it's just that BMW has the most idiotic complicated systems. I'd personally never own any BMW vehicle ever.
Cost me $500 at the dealership to program the replacement seat belt on my m6 after spending $700 on the replacement and swapping it myself XD. I just bought the programming software off a sketchy eastern European website after that. was like a grand or so, cant really remember but everything was preinstalled on a laptop and I could use all the cables I already had for my other laptop with the diagnostics software so not too bad.
Thinking about this a little more, the more questions I have. Battery float voltage does not change with battery life. It shouldn't be that hard to make modules with a wide input voltage range so battery condition wouldn't be an issue. Why is this not a problem for other manufacturers?
Meanwhile, in my Honda: *oh look my automobile just fucking works*
Right? Lmao I have a Corolla sadly not a S or XRS model and I have none of those awesome all electric stuff they will cost me a ton of money
@@DonutVIP my dad's been running his Corolla into the ground for 10 years now and it's purring along just fine.
@@lv.99mastermind45 right?! No oil change and starts on the coldest day
As an Audi a7 owner, on a daily basis I think about how nice Honda owners have it.
I have a Cadillac with the exact same thing (of oh it just works)
It's got a bunch of fancy shit I suppose, but it's not critical to the functionality of the car.
I love how BMW do this "for the customer" but make it impossible without expensive specific equipment they just so happen to own
It's possible with a $20 cable and 2 minutes of searching online for software... though not through official BMW sources, which does make your point valid if you ignore anything that's not official BMW.
Why just dont put the battery reset function into the settings menu in the Infotainment System? German car builders are extremely stupid when it comes to electronics. They just can Hammer iron and Do like they did something demanding
@@johnathankrausrig9237 yes, they could simply allow the customer to reset it for free without a scanning machine.
They don't like their customers. For that reason, I'll not buy from them. Companies who hate their customers don't deserve to have their customers
You obviously don’t know what a Carly scanner is
I just got an Audi instead
"Why are you removing the fuel tank?"
"I need to change the battery"
-BMW owner
In which model do you need to remove the fuel tank? Sounds retarded on so many new levels
I have a Ford Edge with a four year old battery from Autozone. I installed it by taking the old one off and putting the new one on. Life is good. Keep it that way
your ford edge can't do half the things a 7 series can, hence the complicated electronics
@@dominic7114what about an Ls460?
@@dominic7114I see your expensive German sedan and raise you my Chevy SS
@@Wheagg nice dude, a malibu with a camaro powertrain. Sick car.
My 2020 F150 had to be programmed after its battery was replaced. Most newer Fords do the same.
“Sensitive just like today’s youth”
Bold words coming from a man who drives a BMW
Was looking for a comment about that but didn't expect the rest of your comment lol.
@@02honeydew got you right here my boyyyy
‘Sensitive just like today’s youth’ 😮💨 ouff 🔥
Found the youths
Not his car. Just a mechanic
@@DJ_Birova please tell me that this is sarcasm
Forget the programming. That battery replacement was ridiculous on its own.
Too technical😂😂😂😂
Not… really? But ok lol. Couple more plastics covering the shit, but “ridiculous” like, “these 3 extra minutes are killing me” or “shit I broke a nail removing one of these panels” ridiculous?
Facts
try changing the battery on a suburban
try changing the battery on a ~2016 escape
You pay extra premium for the car and you pay extra premium for the work. Nice German engineer
100%
this shit actually safes you money. I replaced the battery on my wifes car for the first time last year and it was buiult in 2006. i had an e60 an e92 which both had the original battery in it.
An alternator that creates more voltage over time solves a problem that never existed
not defending bmw but batteries in fact do drop in voltage as they deplete. Idk what the fuck you're on about.
@warguy6474 the alternator literally charges the battery when the engines running, maintaining 13-15 volts which Is above the available voltage during a cold start. Increasing the output of an alternator does not increase the lifespan of a battery which is already around 4 years....
As a mechanic, I can say German engineering solves alot of nonexistent problems
Are you restarted? We know when a battery depletes the voltage drops. The battery is fuckin charged by the alternator constantly when the engine is running so the battery will not drop below 11-12volts unless the battery is loaded while the engine is not on. If for deplete you meant as the battery ‘gets old’, that’s not true. The base voltage always remain 12v, but the battery will loose the ability to store current as it did when new (ence it lose the amount of current it’s able to store)
Your battery still dies
@6474 So you add simple 10$ voltage regulator and all electronics can have 100% proper voltage even if battery goes below 12V... So simple solution, that does not cost anyone to visit shop for simple battery change... But where is BMW money in that?
BMW: How complicated do you want replacing the battery to be?
BMW Engineers: “Yes.”
Precision German Engineering
@@phillippevictor that doesn’t exist anymore starting with the millennium
The car is supposed to last only a few years at best so you buy a next one and that battery should last that long
BMW Engineers: money money money
@@Plackomiot I was having a discussion with a mate of mine about the what or how long is "sealed for life" meant to be.
Regarding BM auto transmissions.
We determined 3 years..
Rinse and repeat.
The manufacturers don't intend on you owning a car for longer than the warranty period.
Obviously people run cars for longer decades even.
This is here stealerships make their money.....ker-ching!
With all those sensitive electronics you would think they would be able to monitor the condition of ANY battery installed and charge it accordingly. Especially since that technology has been around for a long time.
Yes just like every other manufacturer does it's called the voltage regulator.
My thoughts exactly.
A good chip for this s literally $0.22 in bulk
The reason given in the video is not correct, as you state, voltage regulation has been in alternators for decades.
The real reason is that those early BMWs were some of the first vehicles to have smart charging based on temperature, battery age, auxilary load etc. a new battery can be allowed to run without alternator output for a while to allow the voltage to cycle and prevent sulphation of the plates.
This is why the first batteries in these cars could last up to 10 years in some cases.
As the battery ages, it is less reliable and the duty cycle of the alternator will increase to ensure battery reliability.
When you fit a new battery, you tell the car it can resume its smart charging strategy.
In the case given, id put the short battery life down to vehicle usage or battery quality.
@joshbridges8410 but the modules should be able to run tests to determine battery condition. All you have to do is a load test. The engineers know exactly how many amps the starter needs and what that draw is on a new battery. Program that into the module and see what the battery shows during cranking. Boom no need to reset the battery life.
“can you give me a jump?”
“sure just let me disassemble the rear half of my car”
Actually 🤓. Theres jump terminals under the hood on most all cars even if the battery is in the back. Some cars also cannot be jumped by there so the terminals are used to pop electronic trunks to access the battery. Bmw can be jumped under the hood tho. Or just get a car with a manual transmission and use the old school push to start.
Jumps in the front mate
Bro there's no way you didn't think this through before writing that comment 😂😂
Id imagine it would have jump posts under the hood like the charger and challenger
@@OkamiiSenpaiE93 owner here. Yes it does.
I'm an electrical engineer. While I was in school I worked closely with battery management systems, different battery, chemistries, battery, life cycles, and more. Was through both involvement in undergraduate research and an electric vehicle competition team. It makes absolutely no sense to increase charge current into a lead acid battery later in its life cycle. It literally serves no function. I would love to hear what justification that BMW engineers had for increasing the charge. Current, float voltage, or any other charging parameters for age.
Not increasing charge current for the battery. Increasing alternator output for the high peak load electronics when the battery is no longer able to cover those current swings.
Even so, you'd think they'd be able to develop some sort of monitoring system to detect current droop and increase the power to the field coils on demand, rather than just increasing the alternator output over time. 30 seconds of thought: a big capacitor held over the required voltage, kept charged by the battery. Monitor the recharge transient time. Takes longer than expected? Maybe the battery is getting old. Was taking a long time, suddenly back to normal? Must be a new battery.
I found on a german forum:
When the Battery is new the car completly disables the alternator when the car injects fuel. this funktion will be reduced in some steps when the battery gets older.
additional the battery will be charged shorter and then switched to uphold voltage (maybe wrong translated)
its done to deaccalarte the lead sulfate dismantling (maybe wrong trans) and fuel efficience.
additional BMW same says its not necessarily when you change to the same Type. On originals BMW software you can change from AGM to Lead and the AH
and i want to say it works. i changerd the battery on my wifes car last year. its a 2006 120d with the original bat. I had a e60 530D and a e92 335i all original Bat. While my accord CU3 needet after 9 years a replacement and there was already a aftermarket bat. the 2011 CRV from my dad had the second Battery. and the Jetta Mk4 1.9tdi needed 2 from 2012
Anyone else with knowledge that BMW's used to burn starting from the trunk?
@@russia4ever325makes sense. My car has a smart alternator, where the ECU turns off the alternator as much as possible. An old battery would cause wild voltage swings, with the stalling and losing power if the battery is completely shot.
They have all that technology but they can’t auto detect that there’s a higher voltage🤦🏻
We have such devices. But they cost $10.
That's over 3 million in a year for the US alone.
That’s exactly what I thought of too!
Besides, they tout their designs are the most intelligent.
What I find wild is that every single other car manufacturer seems to have figured it out where BMW hasn't. And they're mostly cheaper.
@@user-uh5wr2fv1m the only thing germans are good at is making things complicated.none of their junk lasts.
This is a good anti-BMW ad, thanks man!
I thought BMWs being BMWs was enough anti-BMW advertising in itself.
@@a-10warthog23 🤣
Pretty much anything made in Europe is a good enough reason not to buy anything made in Europe.
I stopped driving BMW like 10 years ago, now I have much less headache
Most people who own bmw, never own them outside of the warranty period.. so don't care if they break.
I’m an electrical engineer. This was something BMW could have avoided. There are MANY electronics components and solutions designed to solve problems exactly like this in low voltage DC applications with a variable source.
Voltage regulators, Low drop out regulators, diodes, relays, and even basic transistor logic can all be used to keep a circuit functional under battery drain, and help to isolate/protect the circuit should the battery voltage fall too low to function anymore.
There are common well trodden roads for protecting devices from under voltage situations. This situation occurred from either laziness or malice, or some nasty combination of the two.
I’m convinced that engineers just sit in a board room snorting cocaine.
"And we're done"
3 or 4 hours later.
Every mechanic 😂
4hr Job + battery...$900 😂😂😂😂
@@hacatan24 This is the reality of owning these German cars. You pay a hefty maintenance price. For a honda you probably pay significantly lower to do the same job!
@@10RBREEZY that's true...
@@10RBREEZY Yup. Last time I changed the battery on my Honda, it was $100 and done in 15 minutes. Most of that time was screwing around finding the right tools in my garage!
“Why we program bmw batteries” >> moneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoneymoney
BMW: How much of a piece of shit do you want to make this car this year?
BMW Engineers: Yes
No need to be such a hater. It’s good car just hard to work on.
@@nam3go3sh3r3are they tho? Statistically they won't ever beat a Toyota or Honda. All German cars make everything complicated
@@nam3go3sh3r3
I give credit to BMW for their engine performance. But why *OVER COMPLICATE* the rest of the car?
Battery replaced? You need to recalibrate.
You want to reset the service interval? Get a OBD device or service it at our dealership.
And the most egregious and recent thing:
You want heated seats? Better fcking pay for that as a separate subscription EVERY MONTH!
@TheMaremessina Honestly, it really isn't. I wouldn't be shitting on BMW otherwise if it truly was a good car
@@rickharrison3304 You've obviously never owned decent German cars 😂
Very simple solution. Program the computer to monitor the battery voltage, temperature, current and charging voltage to determine the health of the battery. Display a warning when sustained charging current becomes too high indicating a dying battery. Engineer modules to withstand a larger voltage variation.
Boss: "How's that design coming?"
Engineers: "The windows taste great!"
the engineers might actually be great, but the people they answer to could very likely be saying 'its too simple to be BMW, make it 3x the price'
LOL
@@ts757arse im giving you a like because "dogshit" has been a word I've used in explaining dog shit things for decades now..and, probably, like myself, you could give a fuck less about a like..so I apologize in advance..
@@ts757arse Or just use a remotesense wire to the alternator.
😂
"They're super sensitive just like today's youth" i died at this
Same haha
Emotional damage
Wonder who their parents were...
@@kevingeezy5176 🤡
That comment alone is the reason I gave this one a like 😂
Now THIS is good information.
As a new BMW owner, this info is gold.
Love my 1988 chevy V20 suburban. No worries, cheap and easy to fix and starts every time.
The true reason is to make the consumer “owner” pay more
That sounds about right!
i suspect its because every engineer feels they can improve the wheel
It's all false. It's got nothing to do with anything he said. It's for start/stop, if you don't code the battery replacement all you will notice is start stop carries on not working. That is it..
@@readmore7180 if it is like in VAG cars then there is more to it than just start stop.
It regulates the charge the battery is given.
Had my battery replaced once and the programming for some reason didn't succeed. After a year i had problems starting when my car was parked just for a few days. Visited the shop again, they noticed that the programming wasn't right and fixed it so now everything is back to normal.
Funny that the technician in the video stated they had to replace the battery just after a year, probably unnecessary.
@@cycl0n362 your replacement battery was just shitty. There is nothing else to it.
"That'll be 1750.00 please."
Bring
Money
With
Broke
My
Wallet
Building
Weird
Motorcycles
@@derekdreke4990 bwm?
@@derekdreke4990 big money waste
This video just saved our lives literally. So the homies grandpa is missing right now and it's like 3 a.m. and we were thirsty and stopped to get some drinks. So while we're kicking back drinking some dude pulled up to the window trying to rob us but we're so so engaged with the dynamics of the video leaned in and tried Rob us but since we didn't notice and kind of ignored him he walked away. Thank you.
It's a lot easier to replace BMW convertible batteries if you put the convertible top in the 3/4 position. The hydrologics lock and it won't collapse when you disconnect the battery but I still always put a hood prop in there to make sure I don't get crushed but it makes doing it 100x easier. You can lift the battery straight up and out.
I did something very nice for BMW and bought a new Honda , so they don’t have to worry about replacing my battery…
Hilarious 😂
Don't forget to buy a 10mm and 12mm socket so you can literally fix everything on the car.
Haha damn right!
Love it 😆 🤣 😂 😹
Your comment is gold!
BMW owners: "those Germans thought of everything!"
Anyone who knows German cars: "yeah, every way to fuck you over"
And the worst part is this problem still continues to this day on some mini vehicles but thankfully not the newer bmw hybrids. Imagine frying your electronics just because you changed the battery
If you got an actual German BMW you would find it would be a lot different than the US counterparts and much better car and every way shape or form that goes with all German vehicles that sell over here they don't have to meet the same quality selling in the United States
@@jeep1987 it's the 2002 7 series E65
It was built was only built in BMW's Dingolfing factory in Germany, and the thing with the battery is a design flaw in the first place, nothing to do with manufacturing
right, its only there to get more money from the customers. Same thing with Audi.
I'm a German driving a japanese car, btw. 🤪
@@jeep1987 not true. My 2013 750Li was a true German made car and it was a complete pile of trash. The motor let go on the highway and after the engine was replaced by BMW it got a low oil level light just a week after. BMW builds nothing but trash. If you want a good European made vehicle, buy an Audi.
Common place now. I've had to program a vw passat. Most cars now you can't even change the rear brake pads without a good reader that can make the handbrake rewind itself.
A hand brake that rewinds itself.. , daamn why would they get rid of simple mechanical stuff that didn't need modern electronic tech 😕
So you’re telling me the previous BMW dealership did not reset the computers alternator function?
Everyone else: let's use voltage regulators and switching power supplies to solve this common electronics problem.
BMW: let's just leave a bunch of unregulated loads on the battery, and force them to pay close attention to it.
Perfect
@BumbleBee it may be technically cheaper to do it the BMW way, but in practice it makes the cost of maintenance neglect much higher, and most cars have neglected maintenance at some point in their lifecycle.
@BumbleBee never had a car that you could fill the battery with distilled water, but I had bikes with it and I swear those last a lot longer. Any problem? Just fill it up and give it a proper charge on a good wall charger and off it goes for another year (our lows are 2-3°C
The Ultimate Battery Management Experience.
Well if you can piss away that much money on Big Money Wasted then it might as well have stupid shit going on
"Why we program batteries in BMW"
We don't.
It's actually called the "BMW battery money-making program"
Only if you go to the dealer though. And nobody under 40 goes to the dealer to get simple things fixed
@@basket1099 until a circuit board needs to be replaced. Which only BMW can provide. 💵😭
@@basket1099 I was under 40 taking our 2013 750Li to the dealer.
@@basket1099 Not when it comes to this brand.
The 7 series you said nobody likes... I totally love it
He was sarcastic
Fun fact. At VAG we do the exact same thing for the exact same reason 👍
The engineers where so damn caregiving that they developed a specific "bmu" instead of fixing the problem on the board. Angels from the God of mechanics and electronics
For real, was the car released before voltage regulation was invented?
@@lgqst That’s ridiculous, why would you make it needlessly complicated by adding circuitry like that? /s
Why can’t bmw just put a “reset battery” option somewhere in the settings of the car/infotainment? 💰💰
They can
cuz they wouldn’t get to fleece customers for more $$$ then
Next generation will require reprogramming every time you buckle your seat belt.
Because that would be too logical and they would not be able to suck more money out of your wallet when it's in for "service"... 😎
That's a great idea, and that's the problem, it's a great idea. Unlike the N55's (and others) 3 part crank hub. You'd think it would save them money and mass if it were a single part, but nope easier timing of engine as they laugh while the car leaves the building.
Bro randomly dropping the hardest roast ive seen all day.
FYI, the battery registration history is reset with a software update so a history showing no replacement may not mean it's never been registered. It may have had a software update.
Damn. I love that my '89 BMW has none of those electronic nonsense 😅
“Just like today’s youth” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
So I’m confused why you have so little likes, maybe the sensitive ones are salty for being called out, or no one heard it…. Couldn’t stop laughing when I heard it 🤣
Funniest. shit. ever. "🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣"
It’s a perfect description of my gen
How are you so insensitive? I am offended. And think that is absolutely correct, as part of today's youth lmaooooo
@@268NA_Impreza there's always a hog in the replies pretending it's funnier than it is lmao
“Like todays youth” ❤❤😂😂 best quote of the vid
I like the battery in the trunk. No rust or gunk like the one's in the engine compartment.
You should be able to do this through steering controls or navigation.
M not able to do can u explain how can i do because i installed new battery now car says starting navigation got stuck on this message and music is not working
Damn! Remember old technology, they had sensors that told the alternator how much electricity was needed.....
Go drive your 85 year old tin cafillac 🤡
They still do lol. Just not on “luxury” cars.
@@KattarRSSHindu you’re special dude. Go home
@@KattarRSSHindu I'd love to have an 85yo cadillac to drive
@@KattarRSSHindu cafillac ... says the 🤡
The real fun thing is figuring out what cars need a battery reset and what ones don't. I just try with the scanner on every vehicle at this point...
Sensitive as today’s youth. Boy you ain’t kidding!!!😂
Wow now it all makes sense , I was trying to change my aunts battery in her bmw and those issues you explained kept happening since I didn’t register the battery 🤯
That’s absolute idiotic why would I have to get a 3000$ scanner to get my battery synced with my car
@@minimalisticmime5459 nobody said you have to lol
@@minimalisticmime5459 you can pick up one of these offline for like 80 bucks it’s a high end bmw so they knew it would be something a expensive mechanic or DIYer woikd work on but now you can get these scanners for 100 or so bucks cheaper then most toolboxes
@@minimalisticmime5459 You can get a scanner for 30$
@@minimalisticmime5459 mhd adapter is less than 100 flasher license is less than 100 super license is 300 and you can tune the car
When I change the ink on my printer, it asks me, "Did you change the ink?" I select "Yes," the ink meter is full, and that's all there is to it. I did not need to take my printer to the dealer.
*yet
But the printer will refuse to accept the cartridge if it was manufactured by a third party.
@@LordSandwichII It's not just the sensor in the cartridge for sensing the ink level, but an EPROM that will contain an identifier, so the printer knows to refuse it if it's not recognized. They may even maliciously install a page counter into that EPROM to prevent it from being refilled after the page count has been reached. The manufacturers always say that this is for quality control and to avoid damage from non-standard consumables, but the REAL motive is, of course, so that the company may make as much money as possible. I had a colour laser printer once, that had page counters on the EPROMs of those toner cartridges, which would count down even if printing in b/w. I had to build an interface to reset the page counter on those cartridges, so I could get my money's worth of those cartridges. Very annoying.
But...how does that ensure a profit stream at the printer dealer's service center? If you did have to take it to the service center, they'd be able to offer you all sorts of other services that you didn't know you needed AND charge you for the ink replacement.
@@Texas240 As somebody who's had to take apart and service these printers, I highly doubt it. And while I'm always happy to pick up tips and tricks from somebody who's been doing it longer and knows better, I'm competent enough of a mechanic to know when I'm being fucking scammed.
Reason #274 why I drive a 15 year-old car: *I don't have to tell my car it has a new battery.*
my 120d is from 2006 and does have this
I love how simple is changing the battery on my diesel powered 2011 Hyundai i30...
Wow, such a high tech vehicle and it's dumb when it comes to charging.
Overcharging also will cook an Alternator.
I'm guessing you have to reset the oil sensor too when you change oil.
You do in a porsche or else the change oil light comes on again before the next oil change
As a BMW/mini technician myself you don’t have to reset the oil sensor it does it by itself you do have to reset the oil change light tho just to let the car know the oil has been changed like any other car
@@205carreviews8 thats GAY ...
Oh yeah resetting an oci ight is super high-tech I got to do it all the time in my 2013 base model Corolla. And let me tell you it takes all of an agonizing 4 seconds
u also need to change the sensor for wiper blade or else the car will think its raining everyday. 😅😅😅
This is a solved problem, it's called a voltage regulator.
That will be $1.5M for consulting fees, thank you
There is one. It needs to know how much charge a battery needs though....
@@magincap70 thats kinda what a voltage regulator does...
@@ClumsyCars no. It's not that simple. It's like saying oh, I can control this water level with this lever and not installing a float switch that does it automatically.
Hows it going to regulate if it doesn't know what to regulate?
A new battery needs less amperage to achieve the same charge as am older battery.
If you tell the regulator to charge a new battery like it would an old battery you over heat the new battery. Voltage and amperage are not the same.
@@magincap70 automotive batteries have standardized voltages. This problem is easily solved by using a coulomb counting shunt. The only situation in which such a shunt will lose count is when a battery is replaced or completely depleted to flat. In either case it will be replaced or need to be replaced and is easily inferred that remeasuring the battery should take place.
This is a disgusting conspiracy from a bloated pig of a car company to get you to buy specialized tooling because mechanics aren't technically inclined to know better.
This was engineered to pay dividends to BMW, not engineered to be repairable or end user serviceable and any attempt to claim otherwise is just huffing copium.
@@DingleFlop call up bmw and tell them how to do it better then.
You act like it's some expensive procedure. You can buy a $30 scan tool that will do this that doesn't pay bmw a thing.
Volts and amperage are not the same thing. I can test a battery and it be at 12.6 volts and it won't start the car because it can't provide the amps.
The only time a shunt won't work is when a battery is replaced?
That's when you register a new battery. After you replace it.
Fuck.
That looks fun to jumpstart
that youth line was accurate af
You had me at “why does BMW..”
It's all about the money. That's it
Every company is doing this nowadays, at Ford like 75% of the battery’s I replace need a BMS reset
Dumb AF of a design. At least make it user friendly to reset the counter. That's bad engineering when you have to see a stupid mechanic every you change a battery.
It's so they make profit but yea why I stick to old vehicles
Actually it’s good engineering cuz you have to pay to get it changed. User friendliness was not an objective when making that system
But but but I drive a BMW and look like I've made it in life lol
It’s not dumb just you’re too poor to take it into the dealer as designed. Real BMW owners don’t care what it cost they just want it done
@@CoolArrow78233 so real BMW drivers are careless monkeys who are willing to give away their hard earned money? Is that what you are saying?
"Just like todays youth" 😂 killed me
Correct me if im wrong. Batteries need a lower alternator charging voltage as they get older because they will offgass with too high of a voltage when charging.
Only skilled mechanics know this....kudos to you sir
"there you go sir, that wold be 3000 dollars"
Yeah bruh a regular person doesn’t know this.
😂
and few days in the shop
Nah, that's just the lithium ion batteries in the newer M vehicles.
Just another way to ensure you have to go to a dealer for the battery replacement.
"Just like today youth" 💀🤣
Gotta reset the battery deterioration at acura if they have idle stop that tells idle stop if the battery is good to use or it wont shut off
Dang it's almost like they want customers to stay away 😂
You mean they want the customer to take to the mechanib just to change the battery
@@stripecatflippangitnamecha8721 if you're a man you know we don't do that. Especially to change a dang car battery 😂 .
@@t4rbrah899 yeah they’re specifically targeting people like you though, shit isn’t simple anymore and you can do a lot of damage because of these types of things
So you literally tell us, BMW hasn’t figured out how DC/DC converters and Voltage stabilizers work…
But they can tell a alternator to simply charge with higher voltages with time…
(doesn’t sound right to me)
Yeah, sounds like a very bad and more complicated solution to a simple problem 🙄
@@LunaticCharade sounds pretty German to me!
Such a greedy solution. Taguchi defines quality as "what is taken away from society". Poor quality from BMW.
Sounds fine to me, it's a bmw
Bad design (sigh)
*Complications is surety that it is stressful!*
Finally had to replace my 2013 X3 battery, mfg date on it December 2012. The programed increased alternator output keeps them living longer.
When my 99 Sierra needs a new battery I just throw the new battery in, toss the old one in the ocean to charge the eels, and I’m on my way….
😄 🤣 😂
That's so messed up. Everyone knows batteries are best buried deep by the well.
That’s messed up… African kids could’ve eaten that battery…
@@miepmaster25 give some to the Israeli kids too.
1000s of dollars in overengineering, and yet BMW still doesnt know what a voltage regulator is
Not only they do know what a voltage regulator is, but also they know their customer is an idiot 😅
They do, this explanation isn't quite right
Fr
I learned this the hard way, had my battery replaced and the shop didn’t reprogram it, later found that the plastic unit on top of the battery was partially melted as it must’ve shorted 💀
Batteries needing to be registered is more and more common these days. My 2014 Peugeot 308 needs to have the battery registered because of the Stop/Start that has never worked. I had to get someone to install my battery because it's tucked away right at the back of the engine bay which makes it difficult to get to and it's a time consuming procedure to register a new battery.
In my previous cars, I could just swap the battery out without needing to do anything with the exception of my VW Golf. I had to turn the wheel all the way to the left, all the way to the right and it just worked.
The stop/start never working is a blessing in disguise.
Cuz they want you to take it to the dealer every time
“All the electronics were sensitive”
“Just like today’s youth”
He nailed it 😂😂
Did he though? Cause all the Karens I see are not very youthfull. And all the social studies professors that are making the youth sensitive along with other influential people are not young either
@@dimitrijekrstic7567 you need to look up ’social justice warrior’ and come back after that
@@Robin-hi8oq You need to search up 14 year old edgelord and realize that those days are behind you.
@@HoloScope i know its a bad example but imo the youth today (in america specifically) seem to have their feelings crushed by nothing and wanna cancel everything. Atleast it seems like it
@@Robin-hi8oq Rarely do people get their lives ruined for something they didn't do or didn't deserve to for.
Just like today's youth. Absolutely loved that
Mustangs: *Oh, a new battery. Very good.*
“Just like todays youth” you ain’t lying right there 😂😂
🤣😂🤣🤣😂
That’s my youth but it’s true cuh
Spot on. Lol
I knew this response would be at the top of the comment thread. I might have been a 80’s baby and an 80’s/90’s kid (i resent the millennial categorization), but we rubbed some dirt on it, and sucked it up buttercup, cuz there’s no crying in baseball!
Ha
"Hence, you give a lot of money to BMW for owning one of their cars"
Most BMW drivers never actually own there car, they have to give it back after paying for it's rental. PCP. Finance. Companies own them.😂🤣😂🤣
@@stephenjones9153 unless they are used bmws which are only good if mechanically kept up
Yeah, I fixed a Mini no-charge fault by *disconnecting the alternator from the network* once. And it doesn't prevent overvolting damage, it diminishes alternator output over time to extend the life of the battery and also to temporarily shut down the alternator for a small horsepower increase when you floor it. It is ridiculously over-engineered for no reason. There was absolutely no need to add another independent network to do what nobody asked for; just to increase the number of failure points.
I rlly loved the e65 tbh
‘Electronics sensitive to voltage range’
Lol my audi’s voltage pulses constantly between 11 and 14v at idle, it’s so bad you can see the headlights and tail lights flashing from outside the car. Maybe I should start to be concerned..
Sounds like an alternator problem.
Yes
I had Hyundai i30. Whenever you used hazards every iluminated button inside startet flashing aswell 😂
@@tomasfiala4623 sounds like a battery problem
No, modern electronics are safe enough, they could run aswell on 5 or even 24V
Its only a scam from BMW so you buy the battery from them aswell as the unnecessary reset of the softwate
Love how he claims every mechanic knows this yet goes on to show that it’s never been done 🤣🤣🤣
Everyone else just uses a voltage regulator, Germans like solving problems that weren’t problems
Goddamn Engineers did it again
- " Personally, I KEEP the battery, and i REPLACE the BMW with a new one !... " (Ritchie Rich)
In mother russia be like
😂
That savage man.
Well, what BMW is saying is: ”we do this so we can get more money”
Yeeaaaahhhhh...... my love for BMW especially as a favourite over the mercedes, just plummeted.
It was hearing about how difficult those things are to maintain outside of the mechanic's involvement. I didn't even know little things like this needed to be so complicated. 😂
Just ensuring you come to the shop to replace a battery and pay the trolls.
The perfect solution to a problem that shouldn't exist
I have an E65 and it's beautiful...only just 80,000 original miles. It's a 2003 and runs like a dream. 🤷🏻
One of the best. One of my favorite ones
Bring back the days when cars were cars and want perfectly fine with a few parts
Actually it does not fry the battery... But it's for the car to have like a baseline of the Voltage Levels that are possible and not damaging for the battery so for example if it's really low the car can tell you to start the motor! (Those BMWs already did that by a check control code)
“Just like today’s youth…” felt that one when I just wanted to know why new batteries in BMW’s need to be programmed 😂
I immediately started looking for this comment as soon as I heard it 😜😜
Its funny cuz this dude is ok with bmws scams yet hes one of those dudes who call people “snowflakes” dudes totally spineless lmao
@@cmnidit4444 ikr lmao
@@cmnidit4444 looks like someone’s hurt he got called sensitive
Preprogrammed!?
This is a super annoying feature that needs to be rectified asap by bmw engineers.
As soon as they get a chance to put down their crack pipes I'm sure they will look into it
Didn't you just watch an explanation on why it's done? The fxck?
@@dimitrijekrstic7567 yes and the reason is assinine. Should be able to sense battery condition automatically.
@@dimitrijekrstic7567 sensitive European electronics that cook themselves, we heard the video it's just that BMW has the most idiotic complicated systems. I'd personally never own any BMW vehicle ever.
@@dimitrijekrstic7567 yeah it's done because BMW is to fucking dumb to use a voltage regulator 😲
Cost me $500 at the dealership to program the replacement seat belt on my m6 after spending $700 on the replacement and swapping it myself XD. I just bought the programming software off a sketchy eastern European website after that. was like a grand or so, cant really remember but everything was preinstalled on a laptop and I could use all the cables I already had for my other laptop with the diagnostics software so not too bad.
Cars are so fun these days. 👏👏👏
"Super sensitive, just like today's youth"
You sir are a godsend
I cracked my ribs laughing to that statement.
Damn i love my old-school 50s cars.
Programming wiper washer fluid as soon as it finishes😂
Thinking about this a little more, the more questions I have. Battery float voltage does not change with battery life. It shouldn't be that hard to make modules with a wide input voltage range so battery condition wouldn't be an issue. Why is this not a problem for other manufacturers?