Solving for Z | A Calculus of Risk
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- čas přidán 9. 12. 2020
- How much can we gain from the mountains? How much can we lose? Between our own perceptions and the reality of the hazards, how much space exists? And in that gap, how do we decide what we are willing to risk? Solving for Z explores IFMGA guide and father Zahan Billimoria’s relationship to the intoxicating highs and crushing blows of a life in the high-consequence environment of big mountain skiing.
Education is a crucial part of the equation. Learn about Zahan's Samasara Mountain Experience programs, or be sure to seek out opportunities in your own backyard: samsaraexperience.com/
Patagonia Presents a Film by Teton Gravity Research
Featuring: Zahan Billimoria, Kim Billimoria, Rich Rinaldi, Nat Patridge, Don Sharaf, Jeremy Jones Griffin Post & Ian Macintosh
Produced by: Jon Desabris, Jon Klaczkiewicz, Alex Lowther & Monika McClure
Executive Producers: Steve Jones, Todd Jones, Brett Hills, Jimmy Hopper, Kristo Torgersen & Josh Nielsen
Edited by: Justin Fann & Dan Gibeau
Post Production Supervisor: Zoe Catalano
Principal Cinematography: Dan Gibeau, Jon Desabris, Jon Riley & Adam Wirth - Sport
BLOODY, EXCELLENT. As someone who has lost 12 friends to avalanches, and sometimes ponder why I also am still here after all the risks I've taken, I find this film to be extraordinary. Thank you Zahan for sharing your journey in such a genuine and heartfelt manner. It takes real courage to talk about these emotional traumas from the deaths of those we love so much. The heartbreak is real beyond belief. The best friend of my life passed away in 2016 under the snow, and I have to admit, I haven't really recovered.
Maybe its good we never "recover", though. My steeps-shred-mountaineering game has tamed WAY back, which often bothers me...Because I miss those immense drug-like chemical highs. And shit, man, that game is such a giant part of my identity. How is there even a life without climbing and riding giant faces? But in the same token I'm still alive, today at least. I REALLY appreciate how this film dives into the human element of the "human-mountain interface". But that's just the thing, perhaps these "mishaps", or "accidents" really aren't accidents when put into the perspective the environment we are messing with. These large events are the norm in the high alpine, and we somehow convince ourselves that it is "surprising" when we end up bumping into large scale physics. And we're even more surprised when our best friends get killed.
I also appreciate that this film gives zero real conclusions. As stated in the title, its that individual calculus of what is acceptable decision making, and therefore behavior. The math problem remains: As someone who loves high angle terrain more than anything in this life, where do I draw my own lines of what is appropriate behavior for myself? Honestly, to this day I have no idea.
I really am sick and tired of losing people, and then surviving those body shaking tears. Also, the older I get the less interested I become in having my body get all pretzeled and broken in some dumb avalanche. There's also just simply the risk of falling! That small slough that killed Luke and Stephen doesn't surprise me, and jesus christ what a shitty situation that rapidly became for Zahan. High angle, hard snow environments are real deal. I feel that losing an edge and falling high on a steep, hard snow face has actually been my greatest risk for fatality in the mountains. I've sort of had to systematically put a stop to many of my behaviors, because I realized that my future depended on it.
Thank you, all my friends at Patagonia for all that you do. This one makes us think.
i concur thanks for putting into words this deal - this reminds of the myriad close calls that went well and that give me the chills just thinking about how they would have gone sideways if not for the grace of god.
Ouch. 12 friends lost. That's heartbreaking to read.
Avalanches give no warning-when they break, it's already too late.
People like Z blow me away
go for a walk, a normal hike, and see how much you like the ability to walk. Then you'll realize you'd never risk how precious that is.
Gabriel Gunning -- the other ones didn't have/get grace apparently. No, you got lucky nothing major went wrong.
did you read: "drug like highs" ? Look, sex can be a drug (stimulates the brain certain ways), narcotics, and what you call a drug. You've been a drug addict. And like on drugs, some die -- od out -- some don't. PURSUE FUN that's alive and non-injury -- you end your physical life with serious injury).
When taking Spanish from Zahan on the west side of the Tetons 15 years ago, I knew then that he would someday share an astute perspective with the world. I was happy to see it today. Gracias Zahan. Thank you, Patagonia.
Wow guys this one is really special. Brought tears to my eyes thinking about not being able to bring my friends home from the backcountry. It’s a lesson to all that no matter how good you are, nature is uncontrollable. Being in those environments there is no elimination of risk, only mitigation.
This is definitely an Oscar worthy documentary. I hope Patagonia and Teton Gravity Research take the gold.
I don't know if it was the music or how he said, "watching the snow wash over my right boot" and feeling florid when he looked up and no one was there but that really hit me and made me feel a sense of loss and dread no other film has made me feel before.
It’s so interesting to see these top athletes like Zahan and Caldwell really questing into this dilemma of how to balance “selfish” risk with performance, experience, and legacy. Shows a higher level of maturity in these sports/lifestyles; a maturity that I personally appreciate as I adventure into the unknowns. Thanks Zahan for sharing deeply, and cheers to @Patagonia for elevating the conversation.
He’s talking about selfish in the fact that he’s basically choosing what he does over his family and his kids potentially losing a father. If he wanted this lifestyle then he really shouldn’t have kids. Seems like he is trying to constantly justify his selfishness in this video. His ego is too big for him to quit. I feel sorry for his kids
@@toomuch9762 I assume you don't have kids
And if you do have kids, I hope they learn to be open minded rather than just condemning someone because you don't understand them. Zahan seems to be pioneering what it means to understand and reduce risk in the mountains and that should be appreciated regardless of whether you feel he is taking too much individual risk. Have a nice day.
About the avalanche: isn’t he expressing a contradiction, or something paradoxical? Is putting himself in that situation, equipped with great knowledge and experience-is it selfish or very healthy? I do not think it can be both.
Great documentary from Patagonia, haven’t really tuned in on their media until today and was pleasantly surprised. They have always been one of those companies that defies status quo. Usually, outdoor lifestyle brands steadily glorify and promote the “be alive, be free, push yourself to new heights” mantra, but here Patagonia turns over that pretty looking stone to remind us of the dangers of our own egos. We don’t see that enough on instagram and other promotional media because it doesn’t sell lifestyle. This is evidence of core values at every layer of the company-from sustainable sourcing and production of the products, to sustainable marketing to its customers. Coming from a snowboarder, backpacker, and fly fisherman, I’ll keep buying Patagonia gear and checking both my risk factors and ego before jumping into terrain that is out of my league and control. Thank you Z for sharing this vulnerable story with the world, and reminding us that sometimes we can fly too close to the sun, even when we are equipped with the best set of wings.
Thanks for reminding us what we’re playing with. We’re not fighting the snow, we’re trying to listen to what it’s telling us.
Enjoy a safe winter full of amazing adventures.
This film is a strong and timely reminder that traveling in the backcountry is extremely risky no matter how many decades of experience one has. I am definitely guilty of being overly confident at times. This film is a sobering look at how quickly things can change. Thank you for sharing.
Kudos Mr/Mrs Editor. That initial scene of the snow suddenly breaking away under Zahan and fade.... if that doesn't grab you, I'm not sure you're alive. Well done doc. Spectacular.
This was great! Thanks to Z for being so vulnerable and honest in front of the camera.
Another breathtaking film by Patagonia. Really puts things into perspective especially for the new mountain goers
Amazing film. Great to hear about the guys not always picked up by the cameras. The unsung heroes of this sport.
I'm glad you are alive Z and send prayers of healing to you, your family and the families that lost their dads. Your hat reads "Samsara" so likely you know nirvana as the other side of the same hand; perhaps you might consider what differentiates them. May your intentions remain beneficial, your insights deepen and your life be long. Peace. Thank you.
This. All you outdoor enthusiasts who love to seek new places (which come with risk) should watch this. Worth every minute. heartbreaking, heartwarming and reflecting film.
keep your friends close but your enemies closer... thank you for making this film
Absolute masterclass of story telling and production. Yet again. Tears of understanding a stranger with nothing between us but cinema. Thank you for the vulnerability Zahan, and thank you for the reminder that we belong to the mountains, they do not belong to us.
Thanks to all involved for telling this story. It is for me an honest reflection on fragility of life in the mountains. Central to the plot is the risk verse reward gamble that plays out time after time. A lifetime of shared family experiences, graduations, marriage, grandchildren etc etc for a few minutes of adrenaline.
Z you became a scholar of the mountains, scientific and methodical to your approach of mountaineering because the risks involves a loving wife and beautiful children. That’s the heaviest load a father can ever carry. Whilst preparation, and knowledge will lessen the risks the variables that can added to the formula are infinite. Family and loved ones should be the result every time!!!
One of the most powerful, heartfelt, honest accounts of life in the mountains as a guide. You are an inspiration!
Great film, thanks for the ride. Education is important but it's been said thousands of times: There are no old bold mountaineers.
Sadness and grief takes much longer to process than one thinks. Talk about a massive landslide of unprepardness. If one is going to live a selfish life, then take a course on death and dying. Get your house in order. It helps everyone around you.
Great production TGR and Patagonia.
Just came from Totally Deep Podcast with Z. Give it a listen - this guy is very smart.
This one was special. Nothing else to stay. Stay safe, be present. Love to y’all.
This documentary is amazing. Watching him describe what happened was tough. Experiencing death the way he did that day will certainly change a person. I had a similar experience a few years ago, I had to do cpr on a friend of mine, was able to get a pulse back but ultimately she passed away a few days later. One of the worst days of my life. I hope he finds peace one day though, I’m still searching too.
just hiking the tetons is intense. these dudes are next level
Z says, " I have every intention of surviving my career". , which puts things in perspective. He is now confronting middle age and in time will handle old age ( where he will only be able to look up at the mountains.... but with love-joy-tears.)
We talk about inspiration a lot but it's rare I'm truly inspired, which means to me that I'm moved to do and be something better. Respek!
my bredda!
Zahan is an inspiration on how to balance a love of the mountains, family, work and friendships, in the face of doing what you love and doing it well and on the other hand coming to terms with nature, and it's unpredictability that makes you question yourself at a deeply emotional level. Zahan is one of those people who will manage the vissicitudes of life and be an example for us all. Take care my friend and thank you for your vulnerability and genuine.
Almost 30min of permanent goosebumps. Great film
Thanks for sharing your story. How we approach risk vs reward in the backcountry is a an ongoing struggle. It’s been a while since I’ve seen an skier/ athlete be so vulnerable.
Excellent story. Excellent filming and editing. Didn't know drones were allowed in the Park. Maybe TGR got special permission, but those drone shots were extraordinary. Nice job TGR and Zahan is a new hero of mine.
I was not expacting this energy and dedication when I started to watch this movie.
Yo I'm stoked to see Zahan again! I saw him first in Mark Smiley's avalanche course. I look forward to skiing with him.
Simply fantastic, fascinating how risk is something humans truly do need to a degree
This was a very emotional experience. I haven't been close to a similar lifestyle but being a passionate lover of nature and the outdoor sports, this hits hard and hits damn right. Thank you for this!
Don’t beat yourself up So much. Keep up your love for your craft and family. The balance is the most important. I’ve been an Artic and Antarctic soldier and experienced the same and greater losses. So good luck enjoyed the film though.
This film is very very welcome. It’s very inspiring, encouraging and welcoming. Feeling encouraged even being an immigrant. The thoughts at the end of the video resonate with ideas and thoughts that I have been learning through meditation with the headspace app.
Super good story about natural and human processes, about the jolting moments when the environmental factors around us and even voices within find very sudden breaks from what we believed were stable bases. More arresting still is that gap between our perception of reality and the actual reality in dynamics we tell ourselves we have mastered academically and experientially. Everyone meets this moment in life but not all live through it. Not all via the same catalysts. Who wins? Those who spend their last day intoxicated still, heady with fearlessness, freedom and power tickling the sleeping fangs of nature? Who loses must be those who survive the break and succumb to the addiction nonetheless.....their wishful legend buried by father time like everything else. Something paradoxical about risk. Not taking risk is itself risk.
I always think of the dangerous mountains being in Napal. this is a great reminder that right here in Utah and Idaho, we lose people every year. I probably need to step up my awareness, good movie loved it, I'd love to meet that guy
What passion! Zahan was able to pursue what he loves, not everyone has that privilege. May he always remain safe!
He’s come full circle, like many, with the value of the sport compared to risk. Ultimately, one comes to realize, life is made up of so much more and the body cannot keep up with the demands forever. But family, friends, other intellectual pursuits are just as satisfying.
Absolute "Gänsehaut-Momente".👍🏾 Was für eine starke Geschichte. Excellent. Ein riesiges Kompliment an die Macher des Werkes.
I get this film. Thanks for sharing it with us all. Risk is what we sink our teeth into and work to hard to avoid getting bitten back in return.
Thank's a lot for this testimony. A lot of humility is necessary to talk about our own mistakes but this is the way to learn about our weaknesses...
SO. GOOD. Thank you Patagonia for sharing these stories, you are constantly inspiring me to be better.
Thank you for sharing this one.
Love every minute of this short film.....I love the message and how deep he has to reach in his soul.....
This was absolutely incredible. Thank you for telling this story!
Excellent film. Well done all around. Really shows what it means to seek the limits of nature and constantly question the merits of risk. Amazing cinematography as well. Excellent!
as a paddler.patroller.paramedic soon to be parent, Z's story resonates deep within me. Not that I operate at his worldclass level at all, but the emotions of the selfish nature of my past adventures as well as having lost so many friends from the river and the rescue world; its tough. Having lost my father in April of 2020, death is now even more visceral. Thanks for sharing your story Z. you are truly #amongstit and #amongstguardians. much love peace and gratitude to you. - Game Gunning, Salmon Falls Maine
Wow, thanks Zahan, TGR and Patagonia for making this fantastic doc. I am struck most by Zahan's humility to admit that much of what happens in the mountains can be traced back to selfishness. Stop and think about how often we accept the "He/She died doing what they loved" platitude (...to heck with whatever aftermath is left in the wake of risk-taking and grief). I think many of us stop there, because that conclusion lets us off the hook; we don't have to do the hard soul-searching to ask if its all worth it, and at what cost.
Lol
Amazing! One of the best documentaries I’ve seen.
Amazing film. One the best of this year for sure. While we love to see people ripping steep lines this films focus was greatly needed to balance out the fantasy with reality.
Awesome!! Thank you for making this Z is an inspiration to not only get in the mountains but prepare physically, mentally and technically. 🤙
Amazing documentary! I can really understand his feelings and the things he's talking about.
This just hits deep, very special film thank you!
Wow, what a monumental and mind blowing piece of living the dream of a mountain guide. RIP, all his friends and the unknown mass of avalanche victims every year worldwide.
Wow what a great doc. I felt Z’s story is very relatable for me. I spent a good part of my adult life studying and training to be a ski guide. It is a dangerous undertaking and requires a lot of patience. It’s also very competitive to make a living with. I’ve had a lot of close calls and been a party in more Avalanche events than I care to admit; I’ve always gone on the assumption that the more knowledge and experience I earn, the safer I can be in the backcountry. At the end of the day, as more of my heroes have perished in the mountains, I can’t help but realize this is a false assumption. Backcountry winter travel will always have risks that you cannot always mitigate, and it’s not possible to know every hazard. There isn’t actually a very strong correlation between experience and skill vs safety, or at least, the correlation has not been demonstrated to me to sufficiently strong to justify such life and death activities. Of course, each person has the right to assume as much risk as they want. I respect Z’s introspection, especially in the context of his family life.
Thank you for this wonderful message. This is how you value life even more and you learn to deal with it.
Thank you very much.
An achievement indeed!
Fulfilling your passion with unwavering determination courage and skill. Well done Zahan! We are proud of you.
None of this would have been possible without your sacrificial love Kim. Thank you for releasing and supporting him.
thank you for making this and sharing it.
there's so much here, thank you.
Brilliant. Thank you for investing in content like this.
Great little film he's right changes good he could guide tourists on 5.8's and still make a decent living and have time with his family 👍
Looking forward to this! Thanks :)
Thank you, this was an amazing documentary piece.
The best TGR has ever produced
This was beautiful ...thank you.
Wow, this video is amazing. It shows the how amazing the backcountry is while showing the incredible danger
One of my favorite parts is where he is ruminating afterwards about how he was always pressing maybe before and that he now could see that having a clear and peaceful mind was of paramount importance for being tuned to the mountain. It makes me think of the ceremonies that the Sherpas have before climbing. It is something - getting really present and quiet in the mind - that I want to incorporate into my expedition preparedness. Thanks so much for the inspiration and for willing to be vulnerable. Vulnerability is really necessary to be strong.
If you love backcountry skiing, please share this intense, inspiring and thought provoking video.
Strong documentary, thank you Zahan for sharing your story. It was emotionally very strong and heart felt. Mountains is not only about fun, therefore we shall act responsibly as well. It seems, that the more knowledge and experience you have, the more you are pushing yourself to the boundaries were miss-calculation has tragic consequences.
Thank you for making this film, and thank you Zahan for sharing your story. I just took my AIARE1 a week ago and this film really hit home.
The most important thing to bring with you in the wilderness: Positive Mental Attitude. Second most important: Humility.
Third: Ability to trust your gut more than your brain (or penis).
And yes, I have taken a ride- Sierra at Tahoe sidecountry, about 50 meters. I have climbed and skied or snowboarded numerous mountains.
One more thing. I visited the Jackson Hole area once. We went into the Grand Targhee side country and the folks at TGR filmed my descent.
I am an ex- Wilderness Ranger, trained First Responder.
Really on a tear here.
Legend, thank you Z!
Amazing film with a very important and real message about risk. Thanks to all involved...
Thanks I really enjoyed that. Zahan has some good things to say.
Really well told and produced. Thanks!
obviously another amazing video from patagonia!
Beautiful story and lesson. Makes me want to try and Live A Life.
Wow. Really amazing profile of Zahan Billimorias. Amazing person, so dedicated to so many aspects of his life. Definitely part PSA to those that travel in the backcountry. But as usual from Patagonia amazing storytelling. Love it
Wow, I got so much emotion from this 🙏🏻
Wow! This was an awesome story! Cool soundtrack too!
Awesome that paragonia is too greedy to make their clothes in the USA instead of sweat shops
Uncle Acid and the Deadbeats, I think..
A truly amazing film. Well done to all
Wow. What an amazing film! From the story and authenticity of Z, to the Cinematography, the choice of music and especially the beauty of the Tetons. This film made me feel alot of emotion in a short period of time. Well done!! 👍🏽 👍🏽
Really good film.
Fantastic stuff. Thank you for approaching this difficult subject.
Well done.
Amazing depth in this film. love it.
Great video, thanks for sharing! My uncle died in an avalanche early 2010 while back-country skiing with some buddies ... stay safe everyone!
Wow. What an incredible human.
Phenomenal short here. Thank you Z for your honesty, and integrity. Leave it to @Patagonia to once again be leading from the front on issues of morality and ethics.
I've been a lot of crazy places, done some stupid things and got away with a few close calls. Then I decided to raise a family. This means a wholesale revision of the risk paradigm, as well the situations we deliberately place ourselves. If you're not engaged deeply in this thought, it's high time to mature.
Inspiring, powerful and timely. Thank you for sharing your story Zahan, TGR and Patagonia!
Patagonia x TGR should be partnering more. Wow
Patagonia delivers as always ;) Super stoked on this adventure again - Our dream is skiing every day and living in our own Tiny House next to it! And by the way we are building one ;)
amazing to hear all of your reflections, sending you my best vibes! z
incredible documentary!
Great film you guys, what an epic adventure!
What a good film... Man.
Wonderful piece. Thank you.
this was so beautiful, and breathtaking. And inspiring.
thx for this masterpiece and nice story !