Josh Johnson Is Not An Alpha Male | CONAN on TBS

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  • čas přidán 19. 09. 2017
  • Josh once returned a jar to Trader Joe’s because he couldn’t open it.
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    ABOUT CONAN ON TBS
    Airing weeknights since 2010, CONAN on TBS is home to topical monologues, remote segments, celebrity interviews, musical performances and stand-up from the top comedians in the world. Watch highlights, outtakes and behind the scenes footage of Conan palling around with sidekick Andy Richter, tormenting Associate Producer Jordan Schlansky and playing the latest video games on Clueless Gamer.
    ABOUT TEAM COCO
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    Josh Johnson Is Not An Alpha Male | CONAN on TBS
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  • Komedie

Komentáře • 840

  • @gellyrokz3020
    @gellyrokz3020 Před 6 lety +2534

    "I had to return a jar of pickles to trader joe's because I couldn't open it" LMAO

    • @sweetnothing5877
      @sweetnothing5877 Před 6 lety +44

      That line really got me because I've done the same thing at TJs, except it was a jar of salsa in my case. They really need to do something about how tight those lids are damnit.

    • @monkiram
      @monkiram Před 6 lety +5

      I laughed out loud for like 2 minutes. I laugh out loud at like 2% of the videos I find funny, this was hilarious

    • @patphatkitten
      @patphatkitten Před 4 lety +2

      I still have a jar of fruit preserves sitting on my table, and I still can't open it.

    • @AxelMartinez-zk5od
      @AxelMartinez-zk5od Před 4 lety

      I read this as he said it crazy lol

    • @juliat6444
      @juliat6444 Před 3 lety +1

      I have a trick for this cause I'm weak. I stick a butter knife under the lid, use it like a crowbar to let the air out and then you can open it easily.

  • @rakiabey553
    @rakiabey553 Před 6 lety +3905

    He looked so big until conan appeared and he suddenly shrinked WTH

  • @BehindTheScenes235
    @BehindTheScenes235 Před 6 lety +4145

    i’m not even mad that he repeated the clan rally joke from his previous stand up cause it was still hilarious

    • @xxxhypeboibartxxx3235
      @xxxhypeboibartxxx3235 Před 6 lety +42

      Iceboyz07 I’m mad about that this dude is funny like really funny but if you use the same material you look dumb

    • @starrgazer9
      @starrgazer9 Před 6 lety +444

      That's what all comedians do. It's a new audience who hasn't heard the joke. When it comes to stand-up, it's about crafting a joke, not the newness of it (it's more difficult to write an entirely new joke for every show as opposed to writing new songs for an album). That's why with most comedians, you'll likely see them reusing jokes from time to time.

    • @user-gp3vf9gb5s
      @user-gp3vf9gb5s Před 5 lety +1

      Iceboyz07 .

    • @skyskynomnom4674
      @skyskynomnom4674 Před 5 lety +78

      Iceboyz07 comedians often use the same jokes for stand up gigs

    • @donezk98
      @donezk98 Před 5 lety +32

      I still loved the catfishing Dale build-up from the first show so much that it didn't hit as hard as then... He is still a hilarious dude of course

  • @jordansullivan5764
    @jordansullivan5764 Před 6 lety +1633

    "He's going to art school, he's trying!" NO.

    • @celeste946
      @celeste946 Před 4 lety +10

      Oh I heard that guy failed too and was rejected. Wonder what that guy's gonna do next.

    • @erenjaeger0794
      @erenjaeger0794 Před 4 lety +11

      @@celeste946 probably start a baking company? Or even build the biggest oven in the world?

    • @curranfrank2854
      @curranfrank2854 Před 3 lety +8

      @@celeste946 He'll definitely have a lot of struggles. Wonder if he'll write a book about it

  • @MCAndyT
    @MCAndyT Před 6 lety +3321

    "Have you ever had your life saved by someone when the stakes were incredibly low?"

    • @MCAndyT
      @MCAndyT Před 6 lety +58

      "... there's no bottom..."

    • @fuckinwhat7626
      @fuckinwhat7626 Před 6 lety +19

      Literally me everytime I'm with my friends lmao

    • @Galaxy-rj1kj
      @Galaxy-rj1kj Před 6 lety +7

      Andrew Thompson my girlfriend

    • @shintaro_7261
      @shintaro_7261 Před 6 lety +20

      I feel that joke was really over looked tbh

    • @typacsk
      @typacsk Před 6 lety +13

      I have, actually... I was sawing down a prickly-ash tree (well, "tree"), and a friend caught it before it could fall on me and stab me in the skull.

  • @domdittyful
    @domdittyful Před 6 lety +3344

    I feel like the audience didn't give him enough credit for each jokes because they were so caught off guard by him...

    • @guilty326
      @guilty326 Před 6 lety +39

      I feel like it was a paid tv audience

    • @carterdrake651
      @carterdrake651 Před 6 lety +2

      Yeah

    • @patrickcollier9393
      @patrickcollier9393 Před 6 lety +35

      Aaron Kilty they’re not paid
      Source: been to a late night show

    • @Menibor1
      @Menibor1 Před 5 lety +2

      Or maybe they didn’t think he was funny......

    • @INFILTR8US
      @INFILTR8US Před 5 lety +19

      @@Menibor1 trumpers gonna trump

  • @retrogeek994wholocked9
    @retrogeek994wholocked9 Před 6 lety +2010

    "are those clan ribs?" 😂😂😂

    • @Regimeshifts
      @Regimeshifts Před 6 lety +8

      Best line in the set

    • @jimmybones3283
      @jimmybones3283 Před 6 lety +1

      LOL! CLASSIC!!!!!

    • @Salman.khan786
      @Salman.khan786 Před 6 lety +34

      I think you need to go again, I need these every Sunday. hahaha

    • @kingfat5261
      @kingfat5261 Před 6 lety +1

      You bet haha

    • @nicolasdiaz1542
      @nicolasdiaz1542 Před 6 lety +7

      look up josh Johnson catfishing the clan. It's not super funny but how could you not watch something with that title

  • @thatvolvoguy6565
    @thatvolvoguy6565 Před 6 lety +2411

    *CLAN RIBS*

  • @NuparthChaudhry
    @NuparthChaudhry Před 6 lety +419

    Everybody looks tall untill Conan comes up and stands beside them

  • @cyn8140
    @cyn8140 Před 4 lety +284

    “maybe ya friend Dale invited you”
    me: DALEEEE

  • @megamansgo
    @megamansgo Před 6 lety +1012

    Looks like a dark one punch man

    • @namnmerkki
      @namnmerkki Před 6 lety +52

      Stevenson Gibbs lmao true even his facial expression is the same

    • @psycold
      @psycold Před 6 lety +78

      With multiple punch lines.

    • @jouvon
      @jouvon Před 6 lety +6

      hahaaaaa

    • @mikejonesss
      @mikejonesss Před 6 lety +18

      Saitama Johnson

    • @oliverm3589
      @oliverm3589 Před 6 lety +15

      Consecutive Normal Punchlines

  • @nombuso4162
    @nombuso4162 Před 5 lety +85

    'We're the only species where the women mate with the weak'🔥🔥🔥😂😂😂😭😭😭😭

  • @melodyhoward4344
    @melodyhoward4344 Před 4 lety +83

    Josh is literally one of my favorite comedians right now I hope he blows up and gets crazy famous he deserves it.

  • @ihavenolifebutilikeboobsth6035

    Conan seems sincere this time when he complimented his guest.

    • @noumenon3020
      @noumenon3020 Před 6 lety +2

      Conan seems rather woke as of late.

    • @TWINSNAKE47
      @TWINSNAKE47 Před 6 lety +2

      Bc otherwise he would be racist

    • @kameronrichardson2266
      @kameronrichardson2266 Před 6 lety +3

      TWINSNAKE47 not really

    • @MisssKayy
      @MisssKayy Před 5 lety +5

      Conan has always been woke. He's always been highly intelligent and witty. Also very humble and sincere. He's still a Harvard man though!

  • @thatleprechaun
    @thatleprechaun Před 6 lety +858

    Hilarious dude! Wonderful set, really enjoyed all the jokes. I think he's got a bright career ahead of him.

  • @kinsmed
    @kinsmed Před 6 lety +196

    Seven minutes goes fast with this guy.

  • @Geck0GC
    @Geck0GC Před 3 lety +43

    I love how he always smiles before saying "until you go to your second klan meeting"

  • @DarkestofTimes
    @DarkestofTimes Před 6 lety +1077

    The Facebook thing spoke to me on a personal level for real, so true. Got so bad and so depressing I just disabled it. Such a waste of time.

    • @SomethingSeemsOff
      @SomethingSeemsOff Před 6 lety +7

      hell yeah man! props :)

    • @TCt83067695
      @TCt83067695 Před 6 lety +8

      DarkestofTimes same here. Deleted the app from my phone

    • @TEFFTPATTERN
      @TEFFTPATTERN Před 6 lety +31

      Some people don't shut it off because they get into this trend of watching other peoples' lives and it becomes a story, they think by shutting it off they aren't going to know what's happening and they'll just be too curious. A few days to a week after you shut it off you realize quite clearly how little those 'stories' ever meant to you

    • @salmam7996
      @salmam7996 Před 6 lety +9

      DarkestofTimes Instagram is the same DX

    • @DarkestofTimes
      @DarkestofTimes Před 6 lety +14

      That statement couldn't be more true, it's amazing how irrelevant things seem to matter until they don't, they have power over you until you get fed up and decide to pull the plug, then it's like you'd could care less and can't understand why you ever put so much stock in it.

  • @theladybard91
    @theladybard91 Před 6 lety +215

    He's hilarious...and damn he's so wonderful to look at. He's so handsome. 👌

  • @ChristopherSibert
    @ChristopherSibert Před 6 lety +306

    This is so good!! The audience is afraid to laugh!! I can't wait to see this guy in 5 years when he's famous!!

    • @gabumonboys
      @gabumonboys Před 5 lety

      Jokes on you, he's famous now!

    • @BeGlamourlicious
      @BeGlamourlicious Před 4 lety

      He s famous. I’m German and I know him for quite some time.

    • @lifeslemons5408
      @lifeslemons5408 Před 4 lety +1

      Nope

    • @GyzelE
      @GyzelE Před rokem +1

      Sadly the dude still isn't famous. I realized earlier i hadn't seen anything new from him in a while. He's still making new material, still hilarious, but hasn't achieved fame like he deserves.

    • @ChristopherSibert
      @ChristopherSibert Před rokem +1

      @@GyzelE Wow, it's fun to come back 5 years later and watch this again. Still hilarious.

  • @conkersla
    @conkersla Před 6 lety +745

    damn he looks so tiny next to conan

    • @andreashort310
      @andreashort310 Před 6 lety +35

      Yeah, the sizes of their heads are so different!

    • @Johnged15
      @Johnged15 Před 6 lety +8

      I was about to google how tall Josh is and Conan just to find out why the difference was so big.

    • @monkiram
      @monkiram Před 6 lety +35

      I didn't realize he was so little until Conan showed up and I was like woah

    • @bobbymcclure7037
      @bobbymcclure7037 Před 5 lety

      Conker Juega.

  • @hannahwolken7022
    @hannahwolken7022 Před 6 lety +271

    “If you get by a possum you become a possum”
    Is this what happened to Jeff Sessions?

  • @DrMason
    @DrMason Před 6 lety +51

    "I had to return a jar of pickles to Trader Joes because I couldn't open it." --JJ

  • @yosefshawarma3739
    @yosefshawarma3739 Před 4 lety +57

    This guy is sneaky funny. What I mean by that is he doesn’t look like he can deliver a good joke, until he tells one, then another one.
    Rough crowd for such a talented young fella.

  • @AchmedComedy_
    @AchmedComedy_ Před 6 lety +722

    Racism: It's Delicious!

    • @jimmybones3283
      @jimmybones3283 Před 6 lety +3

      Ahmed Korayem LOL! CLASSIC!!!!!

    • @amdavad
      @amdavad Před 5 lety +1

      it really is if you think about it. given that a person is racist, they would never have had tried the cuisine of the group they are biased against. so upon trying it they might discover something they truly like and were missing out on.

  • @thequestion1357
    @thequestion1357 Před 6 lety +346

    I get a strange vibe from this guy. He seems verry mysterious.

    • @gryein7223
      @gryein7223 Před 6 lety +24

      The Question it’s his eyes

    • @Ep-up6ss
      @Ep-up6ss Před 6 lety +67

      It’s the Klan ribs man, it’s change him

    • @changedman430
      @changedman430 Před 5 lety +1

      ella price they do make the best ribs

    • @2310aaron
      @2310aaron Před 4 lety

      I get that during all his comedy routines.

    • @ijennamirabelosuji
      @ijennamirabelosuji Před 4 lety +1

      ella price 😂😂😂😂

  • @poppyorangeflower
    @poppyorangeflower Před 6 lety +84

    Such a beautiful human specimen.

  • @notdabi5912
    @notdabi5912 Před 5 lety +39

    I think a lot of people in the comments don't understand what stand-up comedy is. I've seen so many complaints the he reused a bit.
    Love this guy though i think he's hilarious.

  • @perrinfan
    @perrinfan Před 6 lety +366

    Possums are demons. 🤣

    • @Endy1615
      @Endy1615 Před 6 lety +3

      PerrinLogainKadanFan opossum

  • @soni8995
    @soni8995 Před 6 lety +43

    Omg, he's hilarious...and that smile..

  • @annefrancia83
    @annefrancia83 Před 4 lety +31

    "Doesnt it bother anyone that theres no bottom?" THIS!!!!!! 😅😆😆😆😆

  • @EZDreamwalker
    @EZDreamwalker Před 6 lety +14

    "had to return a jar of pickles to trader joes cause i couldnt open it"
    DEAD

  • @bimboodekunle4296
    @bimboodekunle4296 Před 5 lety +20

    6:45 BRAH The height difference is MAD

  • @natalienagel6617
    @natalienagel6617 Před 4 lety +17

    I just saw this dude open for Trevor Noah... he was hilarious!

  • @loveforeignaccents
    @loveforeignaccents Před 6 lety +545

    Good stuff!!

  • @phillenan2494
    @phillenan2494 Před 6 lety +206

    Damm this Man has jokes and personality

  • @monkiram
    @monkiram Před 6 lety +22

    Anybody else recognize the Dale reference? LOL

    • @chawndel8279
      @chawndel8279 Před 5 lety +2

      Yes, the Dale from Craigslist who is sitting at Finnegan's with his Target popcorn maker. ;)

    • @susankemunto7750
      @susankemunto7750 Před 4 lety +1

      Yes 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @nathyndg
    @nathyndg Před 6 lety +59

    When he started, he was already pretty funny, and that usually doesn't happen.

  • @nanik4913
    @nanik4913 Před 6 lety +15

    'friend dale'
    ugh i remember the first edition of this bit, love the full thing with the catfishing part

  • @gemmaniye9035
    @gemmaniye9035 Před 5 lety +16

    Love Josh! Been binging his vids lately and he never disappoints. Adorable & so funny. Hope his career soars!

  • @MRGMM
    @MRGMM Před 6 lety +49

    this person is funny. id like to see 30 min of him. *edit. searched his name of youtube, stuff.

  • @kraze2373
    @kraze2373 Před 6 lety +788

    he's giving me Donald Glover vibes, anyone else?

    • @MrHerecomesjohnny
      @MrHerecomesjohnny Před 6 lety +56

      I see what you mean but donglover didn't invent being black and dorky dude

    • @kraze2373
      @kraze2373 Před 6 lety +28

      yeah not saying he did, just notice some similarities

    • @zinho223
      @zinho223 Před 6 lety +46

      Int Kraze The voice is super similar!

    • @LRBeforeTheInternet
      @LRBeforeTheInternet Před 6 lety +13

      +Int Kraze Sure, but this guy's actually funny. :)

    • @StraightEdgeHeathen
      @StraightEdgeHeathen Před 6 lety +9

      no because this dude is actually funny.

  • @andreponniah9900
    @andreponniah9900 Před 6 lety +6

    I love how the cameraman doesn't bother to track him at 0:32, just in case there was any doubt about Josh not being an alpha male.
    I know there might just be no one controlling it, but I like the idea of a cameraman that knows that he can wait for Josh to come back. It just makes the bit funnier for me.

  • @enzomthethwa5861
    @enzomthethwa5861 Před 4 lety +3

    Wow. He made it onto The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon AND CONAN??? He has MADE IT!

  • @maddie5851
    @maddie5851 Před 6 lety +166

    Whoaa he's cute.

  • @Jaisean
    @Jaisean Před 4 lety +14

    “Well, that’s your opinion” 🤣

  • @kalebsmith4382
    @kalebsmith4382 Před 6 lety +141

    Where can a man get some great ribs I'm hungry

  • @katburgert4352
    @katburgert4352 Před 6 lety +19

    I feel like he's the funniest spoken word poet ever. Like, that's his delivery style and I love it

  • @someoneonly
    @someoneonly Před 6 lety +40

    William haynes is that you

  • @Sekii1994
    @Sekii1994 Před 6 lety +246

    funny and attractive 👌

  • @liliumjade
    @liliumjade Před 5 lety +8

    I keep watching his stand up and it never gets old!

  • @stephanies3246
    @stephanies3246 Před 4 lety +4

    6:45 THE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE!!! Oh my gosh! He looks like he’s 8 years old standing next to Conan.

  • @user-zu5sp7wx2g
    @user-zu5sp7wx2g Před 6 lety +43

    Well isn't he adorable

  • @DavidSanchez-tf3xo
    @DavidSanchez-tf3xo Před 6 lety +20

    Are those clan ribs?😂

  • @JoshuaOtusanya
    @JoshuaOtusanya Před 6 lety +137

    Hell yea!!

  • @teamFLOGGNAW
    @teamFLOGGNAW Před 6 lety +71

    Before you laugh at the very end
    Remember Conan is like *6'4"*

    • @vampiravoid
      @vampiravoid Před 4 lety +5

      I don’t know why my brain assumed Conan was short, but I had to look it up because the hight difference is insane! I had no idea he was so tall.

  • @amariahziemba711
    @amariahziemba711 Před rokem +3

    I knew Josh Johnson was small, he's brought it up in multiple stand-ups before but seeing him stand next to Conan really put it into perspective 💀

  • @queenivy8600
    @queenivy8600 Před 4 lety +6

    This guy is hilarious! His voice is absolutely amazing.

  • @bigrat4780
    @bigrat4780 Před 3 lety +4

    I was reading comments saying, "oh wow he's smaller-looking next to Conan," but oh my god that's a MINISCULE MAN. I am in awe.

  • @lunamoona1505
    @lunamoona1505 Před 3 lety +5

    I feel like he's one of those guys who's just going to get more and more good-looking the older he gets 😆 Denzel Washington vibes

  • @pitobrain
    @pitobrain Před 6 lety +12

    This dude is actually funny. Keep it up man.

  • @LokiOwl
    @LokiOwl Před 6 lety +6

    I can't be the only one who laughed all the way through, wondered why he was so self-deprecating, and then watched Conan come out and said "Okay."

  • @khaledmahamedbouachat8990

    Anyone else got shocked when Conan stepped at the end lol, that comedian is so short, I was like oh damn he looks good... Then I saw him next to Conan hhhh

  • @JonnyBeoulve
    @JonnyBeoulve Před 6 lety +225

    Really good.

  • @shiannemcpherson8069
    @shiannemcpherson8069 Před 5 lety +5

    He’s so great 😂😂 I wanna see more of this guy!

  • @ijennamirabelosuji
    @ijennamirabelosuji Před 4 lety +13

    The klan thing still made me laugh- slightly different delivery 😂😂
    He’s so tiny though- didn’t see that coming

  • @1purplerose
    @1purplerose Před 5 lety +3

    Good looks and clean jokes!! He's going places for sure.

  • @Janellabelle
    @Janellabelle Před 4 lety +4

    That reminds me of one time my grandmother opened her trash can and there was a possum in there and I freaked out when she just tossed it out. She just grabbed it and it bit her and she didnt care. They really are scary. She's a possum now...

  • @shadicus98_80
    @shadicus98_80 Před 6 lety +4

    "It's the best stuff in the history of stuff."
    Yes.. So much yes to this.

  • @drx117
    @drx117 Před 6 lety +2

    That Cool at the begining was soo cool lol

  • @pureAmericanMETAL735
    @pureAmericanMETAL735 Před 6 lety +5

    Good stuff dude got me laughing

  • @blamtasticful
    @blamtasticful Před 6 lety +3

    I love the little smile he gets on his face before he knows he's about to say something offensive lol

  • @kcthewanderer
    @kcthewanderer Před 6 lety

    That was great. This guy is a character in need of a part!

  • @MminaMaclang
    @MminaMaclang Před 5 lety +3

    He's one of my new favorites and Im kinda craving for more, but Ive seen him do most of this bit already. I hope we see more of him. Craigslist Klan Dale is still pretty great though.

  • @misheleclipper5545
    @misheleclipper5545 Před 6 lety +2

    I have just discovered this man and heard him repeat the same jokes and each time I still have to stop eating so I don't choke on my food. He's really good at this.🎭😂🎭

  • @emmacoleman4644
    @emmacoleman4644 Před 2 lety

    *it does now* I don't think I can ever go on FB again because I will never stop thinking about this

  • @PaddleAsia
    @PaddleAsia Před 6 lety

    Creative and original... great job.

  • @ramjam6934
    @ramjam6934 Před 5 lety

    amazing smile and delivery.

  • @CaptainSurf
    @CaptainSurf Před 4 lety +2

    Josh is fantastic! Love his humour. Needs more credit.

  • @gmoney9068
    @gmoney9068 Před 6 lety +7

    Had to return the jar of pickles because he couldn't open it. hahaha! Good stuff!

  • @overexposedproductions
    @overexposedproductions Před 6 lety +8

    he's gonna go far I hope. I relate to this dude here.

  • @rainelizabeth6648
    @rainelizabeth6648 Před 6 lety +3

    somebody get this guy a Netflix special!

  • @amazingprobst7518
    @amazingprobst7518 Před 5 lety +1

    I haven’t been so happy to discover a comedian since I stumbled across Kyle Kinane.
    I’ll be watching his career with great interest

  • @EmeraldRose333
    @EmeraldRose333 Před 6 lety +17

    Wow! What a cutie Josh Johnson is!

  • @JustEndah
    @JustEndah Před 6 lety

    One of the most beautiful smiles I have ever seen:)

  • @fricken99
    @fricken99 Před 6 lety +22

    Haha that man is good.

  • @reecopolis2248
    @reecopolis2248 Před 6 lety

    the second clan meatingbit was from one of his 2004 bits

  • @joshuafrank869
    @joshuafrank869 Před 6 lety +19

    This guy was really funny

  • @conspiracylibrary2848
    @conspiracylibrary2848 Před 6 lety +1

    awe! Did they make you cut the start of the story? that's what made it 10x funnier. Still funny.

  • @largofella
    @largofella Před 6 lety +1

    He’s really came up. Nice to see him on tv

  • @somethingclever4563
    @somethingclever4563 Před 6 lety +7

    "That's just science."

  • @Megerr-wh3uq
    @Megerr-wh3uq Před rokem

    LMAO! This was wayyyy underrated in laughs from the audience

  • @paulbrasier372
    @paulbrasier372 Před 6 lety

    Best lines I've heard in a long time. Don't change a thing, the audience was not ready because he was so original.

  • @youptascuntretard7021
    @youptascuntretard7021 Před 5 lety

    This is just amazing

  • @nabskiee2578
    @nabskiee2578 Před 5 lety +3

    Josh: Cool
    *Audience Laughs*

  • @krassos
    @krassos Před 4 lety +2

    This man is consistently funny.

  • @sergioreyes2874
    @sergioreyes2874 Před 6 lety +1

    The last joke was in one of his earlier stand up shows

  • @ccdirelie
    @ccdirelie Před 6 lety

    I need more of him in my life

  • @lynze_87
    @lynze_87 Před 5 lety

    The pickle joke is so funny!

  • @Proloyable
    @Proloyable Před 6 lety

    Wow....very intelligent comedy!!!! Especially the evolution bit....