I’m very introverted and find it often quite hard living with my husband and son as I like peace and quiet and nature and they like noisy tv shows and going to busy places. I love them of course but I’m so glad when they go out and I can have peace and quiet again.
I completely agree with you. I have been on my own since my divorce 14 years ago and even though i have four children who are married, i prefer to be alone and i even refuse a family get together. To many people in one place is so overwhelming as i am now used to my own space. Basically, i function better alone and i am able be in a stable state of mind. I am a hermit!
My mother always told me I was going to grow up to be a hermit if I didn't start to come out and associate with people. Well, she nailed it..I love my private life. I do have acquaintances, but everything and every one are kept at arms length. I don't have visitors at my cabin in the woods up on the mtn. I feel safe and secure. Time is irrelevant at home. I'm at peace within myself and feel this is the path God wants me on. God Bless
100% agree. I'm an introvert and love living on my own. My furry companion is a cat. I also prefer not to meet people when I'm out in nature. I thrived in lockdowns. Currently I work 12 hours on Saturday and Sunday and have 5 days off. It's great.
I am 63 yrs old and feel the same. I'm a female who just divorced by my choice because i want to live in the country. I've just purchased 1.7 acres of land in Northwest Washington state, USA. I can't tell you how happy I am to be finally be realizing my dream I've had since a child. I've alway felt strange for wanting to go live in the woods. No one i knew felt this way. In America, you would be considered 'weird' for not wanting to be a part of the growing masses living in chaos striving for more. Give me a simple home, a simple life. Quite.....
Good for you... what an adventure, Id like to do the same. One comment I have, is that city urban living has become unspeakably noisy, with leaf blowers, loud exhausts, running machinery everywhere, music on iphones eveywhere.... and so to move to the country would be a blissful beneficial escape from all that >>>> ; "less noise" x " a number of years" = " lots of unwanted noise "
@@SIERRATREESso true! I moved to the country and they built it up all over the place and now it’s noisy, just like your explanation. So I need to move again! And this time I’ll try to go where there are no other people at all! Just animals and trees and Nature .
When I was a young girl I told my Mum that I wanted to live in a cave. Although married, I spend many hours alone. I don't live in a cave but I do live a reclusive life, by choice. Thanks for another great video! 😊
I am alone due to things of my own making. Some of which were not good and some were. But today is what I have and I chose not to bother or inconvienience anyone with my own life. While I sometimes enjoy company of others, I chose to live a quiet life alone and try to make each day a good day.
Sometimes, as some social obligation looms I get anxious, and decide not to go ; this is followed by a tremendous sense of relief, a high of sorts. The evening will then be spent reading or studying something fascinating.
Totally agree! I've been on my own for many years and can't imagine having someone else living with me. I do have 3 kids and 4 grandchildren, all living in the same town, and don't spend much time with them. I love them dearly, but I love my time to myself.
I've been fairly content alone on my land for the last 20 years. I allowed a young 'van-lifer' to have an overwintering parkup from last September. It was ok for awhile, but his need for company and regular borrowing of tools has worn me down, so after a long 7 months he's been given a leave-by date. At 30yo, he reminds me too much of my young self.....knowing how to fix the world, multiple unstarted business ideas, expounding on philosophies and the words of esoteric gurus whilst not practicing with fortitude himself. I won't be inviting overwinterers again, as the company of friends and occasional visits from family is perfection enough. And marriage, I'll never curse myself with again. I've my woodland, stone, clay, artbooks, and swallows nesting in my barn. Sit on my steps at dusk with a bottle of McEwan's Champion, and watch the bats emerge from my timberwork. No hassle, no pressure.....
Last year, i went down with an illness that has left me virtually housebound. I was amazed to find i love being alone. Being excluded from the hustle and bustle of ordinary life is like a weight being lifted off my shoulders. I love my family and wouldn't want to be without them, but otherwise, im quite content to see other people occasionally. If i want company, I usually come and find it on CZcams.
We are very much the same. My recent cancer has precluded me from society even more. Society tells us it’s wrong not to be a member of the tribe/hive. The more people who think that the better, as far as I’m concerned. 😊
Although some of us enjoy being alone we still need human contact but on our own terms. The lesson for me is respecting people's boundaries so we can all get along. Much love to you all.
That is so true. I interact, but prefer my own company. I would never feel comfortable invading someone’s boundaries or forcing my company on others. In today’s world it seems almost mandatory to make sure everyone around you is aware of your opinions.
The irony is that by being true to yourself seeking the peace of mind offered by solitude your creative talent has flowered and through the technology available you are making true connection to thousands of other minds who are benefiting from your wonderful insights and reflections and by sharing the beauty of nature. Bingo! To me you are demonstrating that taking care of the Self is actually a way to give to humanity so Thank you for respecting your own needs and thereby giving to all of us who enjoy your wonderful videos. 🙏💚🤸♂️
Subscribed. I just discovered your channel today, while looking for videos regarding hermits. So much of what you say reflects what I've come to believe. I'm almost 80 years old now; and at the moment I feel like you've been reading my mind. :)
I am a 100% an introvert so thoroughly enjoyed this video! It’s so nice when you can relate with others. From a child I’ve always felt something was wrong with me as I always felt out of place, stressed, and exhausted being around others. I am completely at ease as I understand me now☺️
I am just like you - I live alone and love my own company. I never get lonely or bored and I do not need to be entertained. I love going out into nature alone to spend time looking at a river and watching all the wildlife around me. To me that is Heaven. I do it often because I also know it is good for my mental and physical health. I too live in my head, but I can still my thoughts whenever I choose so as to enjoy the peace and solitude deeply. Ours is a life of joy and bliss and we wouldn't give it up for anything.
Thanks Nigel... another 'down to earth' video. I've just watched your video re 'Hermit' I couldn't watch it all along as when I'd see the word 'Hermit' it straightaway remains me of my Dad & he passed over 11 yrs ago! So... about 15 years ago.. I remember him sitting smoking his pipe & looking out on to the mountain behind my parents house & him saying (privately) to me that "he could easily become a hermit" I was making tea & stopped in my tracks... as... I just couldn't grasp what he said. He did explain why.. & he did love his wife & family but he yearned 'no people & especially no gossip & valued nature in all her Glory' It's taken me until about 2 years ago to realise what he meant & I fully 'get it' & I too yearn for 'solitude' & could become a ... part-time Hermit! I mentioned in another comment about living in a large town & have tried to move & used 'positive thinking etc' but reality is needed too. Sorry... long comment ... I don't expect anybody to read. Regards. Rose 🦋
Your dad sounds like a wise man. I think it has to be in our makeup to yearn for these things. When feelings like this are in your dna, you just can’t deny it. Thank you for the comment, Rose. ❤️🌹
@primalengland He was 🪷. Thank you for taking your valuable 'time' to read my comment & reply. 'Time' to give to people.. in my opinion is a wonderful - gift. I wish people when meeting up in say a cafe... would put their phones away & be present. Regards. Rose 🌼
Your honesty is so, so refreshing. To enjoy your own company as much as you do is the greatest form of self-love. I adore my husband and my family, but my alone time is something I need for my own well being. It is an absolute must-have!
❤👍LOL For years I've called myself a "hermit-ess" & really enjoy the peace and quiet, of country, and even more so as I age, I'm 70, yet I refuse to grow old. Often I only go to town, once a month and talk to people then, as I live in a friendly state. But then I can go home. This week more trips to a yard sale and auction, so more speaking to people other than my cat. My kids only text and never call. And maybe camping out, but I can always go back to my home base camp and my own space. And as you said, do what I like. With no interference. I'm really glad that I came across your channel and wise thoughts and words. Keep them coming 🙋
I love that..."hermit-ess" 💚Although we both like to be alone, we could probably be good friends. A simple life with my cat. Dreams of living in the country in a "friendly state?" Which state is that? I'm in Cali. People are a mix of hot and cold. Protecting property and privacy, always on the top of the list for most. Easy to be alone. A sense of community harder to find when you want it ,or need it. Be well.
@@dorisemone6778 Hey dori, thanks for noticing my comment. I too once upon a time lived in Cali, long before it was called that. Have family buried there, tho they weren't from there. I've lived in many places and, yes I do miss some. But it seems like the beautiful places soon become over run , with too many sheeple. For now I'm in the central US, Nebraska. Where abouts is your area?
@@crazylady.. South coast area. Always thinking of moving. Miss the seasonal changes. Originally from the East Coast. No problem living a slow life. I have perfected the art of "down time." LOL! Just found this channel. Really liking it! Take care. Be well.
@@dorisemone6778 dori, my daughter in law is from that big city, on that southern coast, family is buried far inland east from there. They moved there for the drs across that southern fence. Me? I've always been part gypsy with itchy feet, so understand, the wanting to move. And something else to consider, is there's so many areas, that are so much cheaper to live in than where you are now. Even though so many states have changed drastically, and become expensive, than such as Montana, everyone now wants to live there, and have brought all their city with them, changing it all so much. I prefer driving for miles, and seeing very few vehicles. 😁 But then again, I am rather selfish, 😊🙋♀️
.@@crazylady.."gypsy with itchy feet!" I like that! LOL! Any suggestions? Affordable, (friendly) places to live and age well? I already live a simple, quiet life, and plan my errands around avoiding traffic and people. Too fast and furious here for me. Trees, rivers, birds, and changing seasons for me!😸
I'm in the midst of discovering what really, truly feels like my authentic self on every level. I have been accepting this hermit aspect of myself and learning how to navigate it. It's been challenging with people who feel they have a need of me and that I am obligated, which most people like this do not accept the fact that nobody is actually obligated to them. Needing something is valid, but impeding on someone else's boundaries as a means to an end is much more selfish than the hermit who said 'no'. The world is not full of hermits so there is no reason for the hermit to be expected to conform to the majority of non-hermits. I am mentally and physically unwell when this boundary is not honored. It's not selfish to live my life to my standards. I am so grateful to be married and happy together with someone who is much like me and also very unique and different from me.
Ah! But…. Society. Society tells us what’s best for us. There would be so many more happy people in the world if we all had the strength of will to tell society to go and do one. 😊
I'm a popular loner. I know alot of people but you'll mostly find me on my own. I have a husband & a 17 year old son. Obviously I'm with them daily but i also have a lot of alone time, I need that. I love my own company ❤
Hello, Nigel-I’m a new subscriber to your channel. After losing my husband to the ravages of Type-1 diabetes, and with absolutely no desire to even attempt to find his replacement, I’m slowly learning to embrace the thing that used to frighten me: solitude, which had always been synonymous to loneliness for me. It’s good to find a voice out there extolling the joys of solitude.
I’m sorry to hear about your husband. I hope you can find peace and happiness. I’m one of those people who is lucky enough to find contentment in solitude. It can be a nice place to be. ❤️
@@primalengland You’re very kind. Thank you. I’m finally at a place along what had once been a path shrouded entirely by the shadows of the past but now has sunlight filtering through the darkness with promises of a peaceful, contented life that’s just ahead of me.
@@cherilynne1946 I’m a believer in time being a great healer. I always say that tears of grief eventually turn in to tears of happy memories tinged with melancholy.❤️
@@primalengland I’d always heard that “time is the greatest healer,” but when I was drowning in wave after wave of grief, I was certain that whoever coined that phrase was full of rubbish. The loss of someone you dearly love creates an emptiness that can never be filled. And while I still believe that, time does heal the wound to the point in which the rawness and the pain are eased. The soft scar remains and becomes part of who you are. It’s up to each of us to either let the scar define us or not. I choose the latter.
@@cherilynne1946 I’ve lost only two really close people, lots of friends, but not desperately close. One was my dad, who died young, the other was my fiancé who died many years ago from cancer. I still think of her a lot. She was the most beautiful person I have ever met, both inside and out. I kept a couple of photographs of us, and when I look at them I find myself smiling, but with a tear in my eye. Her name was Catherine.
Agree…also the last four years has divided people even more and that makes it even harder to talk with others,people who believe what they were told and had all those procedures …the world is nothing like we think it is and once you see that you can be set more free…like you mention the constant news and BS….to spark up conversation with possible like minded folk can be hard… Much easier being alone….🙂👍🏻
Love this, I have always loved my own company and have been in hermit mode for most of my life as best as am able, bar my kids, some family and a couple of friends who I tolerate mostly haha The older I get the more I need peace! I have a sign on my gate which reads Have A Lovely Day, Somewhere Else! Unfortunately people think it is a joke.
I think of myself as introverted and too much interaction with people wears me out. Comfortable by myself with just some interaction. I really liked being married but widowed, I can embrace enjoying the quiet life and exploring all that is me without stopping to be a wife with set duties and compromising. Except for my persistent cat, Tort, who has few needs and is a joy. And cuddles up wondrously on cold nights.
I've always known I was an introvert, I just didn't know there was a name for it until a few years ago! When I found out the traits I thought OMG that's me, it's normal! We are very alike 🐕
Thanks for that Nigel, your posts are so honest and relatable I love tuning in. I would love to wander in beautiful isolated places but being female I have been conditioned since childhood to stay away from these places and stay in busy places which I dislike for safety reasons. Maybe I should adopt a big mean looking dog to accompany me and my beagle 😂blessings to you and Molly 🥰
Big mean dog or some big mean walking companions. I think we are all aware of the perils faced by females on their own. Such a sad reflection of these times.
Even though my husband and I share (note share ) a house.. I consider my self a recluse.. most of the time .. I like my own company my own thoughts my own life..
I'm more like an in-between person. I love people and go shopping once a week for food and to be social, then I love my alone life with my cats as well.
I believe in soulmates, but I'm not sure everyone will find one. There's nothing as beautiful as beauty that is shared. I used to make yammering rationales to justify my depressive lonely state, but I was in denial. So much goes unseen in this world as long as we listen to the clattertrap dialog of our minds.
I have one friend. I never had many, and most are now gone. My one friend is the opposite sex, a bit younger, but we just gel. The only person I can feel truly relaxed with. I don’t do idle chatter. It feels like a waste of energy. I’d rather be alone with my thoughts…. and my dog. 🐶😊
I too love my own company. I have joined a social group but I now have too many friends. I state I am having a quiet time at home only to find they take no notice. They pop round for an unarranged visit or talk ages on the phone.. HELP... I yearn for my life I had before. ❤
we evolved in family groups and villages. I think we thrive in a village environment where you are helped thorough life by family and community and you in turn, help others, women with children in particular. The lonely, depressed city dweller is surrounded by people but knows no-one. Is he a hermit...or a victim of modern society? Some choose to avoid social contact and limit interactions because people 'do their heads' in'. Possibly, historical hermits were much like that.
The idea of Hermits was usually linked to a kind of religious servitude. I think your analogy nails it, though. I think that definition applies to me, pretty much. I always hated crowds and found them intimidating. I would eschew cities like the plague. My childhood holidays were always in remote areas where we spent our time climbing and exploring. My father was a headteacher, watercolour artist and musician. A very beautiful man. I think I was always destined to strive to live my best life inside my own small orbit. the singing bowl shop? I’ve had a few singing bowls over the years. I record and busk handpans, Rav drums and Gouda drums. I also record for my bandcamp channel using lots of percussion. I’ve been a percussionist since I played with Pete Shelley in the pre Buzzcocks band about a thousand years ago. Getting into Nordic sounds lately and recorded a little Viking saga thing. Very simple, but I enjoyed it.
Okay relative to what? From what perspective, by what metrics, at what time, in what sense? Why even ask the question? I was always alone, for one reason or another. I know all the different allegorical structures, all the different psychological architectures, emotional curves, the basis and genesis of living this way or that, what it affords, what it deprives, what happens if a given state or frame of life is disrupted or is made too prolonged, fixation on utility and intstrumentality, engulfment terror, rejection of intimacy, fatigue at the sheer stupidity of the average person, looking back and mourning what's gone and now can never be made up for, wanting to escape the game and being trapped amidst the predator and prey herd animal dynamic inherent to the degenerate trauma bonded human livestock farm posing as a society. All of it. My opinion is that it's a question that isn't worth asking. People who know, know. People who don't, don't. There's a difference also between people who were there, and then left it. And people who watched the world as though through a small window with a thick pane of glass, then finally separated from it entirely. These two are not the same, at all. One had and gave it up. The other never had. A lot of human existence is actually an unconscious telepathic process. However on another layer it's essentially might makes right. "Justice is for the strong". If you're hermit and the others have their natural tendency towards gradual diffusion, you'll be displaced over and over again, and the system they abide by will give them the right. Unless, again, you have the right internal organization to make it so they cannot displace you. Which I suppose for a hermit may well become the goal, immunity. Separation and individuation. Invulnerability, absolute control, and exemption from the natural order.
Yh i agree i dont have friends which suits me, but i hate all this everyone has to know everything about you and your life. Ive got family and neighbours who want to micro manage my partner and i life It never used to be like that
No it didn’t used to be like that. I think that if you excuse yourself often enough, people gradually start leaving you alone. That may not please them, but that’s their problem. 😊
How about using the term "Loner" rather than "Hermit"? I think it would be more accurate. However, the social folk will never understand them whatever you call them. Having said that, I agree with everything you say.
When your viewers comment here, as I am now, it's like the old days when you would get a pen pal and exchange letters. You would never meet, usually. It was as slow as the mail and pleasant. So commenting here, is a pen pal writing back to you.
I’m a 51 year old introvert and my mum an extrovert seems to think there is something wrong with me and has always tried to force me to socialise. I feel this is the wrong thing to do if you have an introvert child. She still does this so she’s not going to change. Being made to feel there is something wrong with me for being an introvert has damaged my self esteem
My son is in his mid thirties now, but spent most of his life as a very introverted kid. It worried us enormously, but mainly because he was bullied at school. I just encouraged him to do what he wanted, just like my dad did, me. He is now a university lecturer in 3D art and a very successful musician. He is still very introverted, and this causes issues when people press him to do things. I just leave him to himself, letting him know I’m always there. We cannot impose our lifestyle choices on others. We can always just ramble on about it like I do. 😁
@@primalengland Very wise to let children be 'true' to themselves... especially in their formative years = the building blocks for life. That's fabulous about your son... fair play + well done. Regards. Rose 🦋
Hi Nigel Agi here from Canada. Just found you. Kindered spirit. Love your hermit videos. I’m one. In a big way. Silly question. I’m debating going into landscaping horticulture as a second job. I’m 47. Do you think it’s too old to start? The plant natural world is better suited to me these days. I have a chance to start a second career and I’m passionate about horticulture landscape plant work. Is there a too old?
Absolutely never too old. I was always a keen gardener and did a lot of garden design. I lost my business, but then my friend bought a house with a huge garden. I have been there today working on it. Horticulture as a career is just a hobby with the added stress of pleasing the customer. Just make sure you have an answer to all their horticultural questions. It doesn’t matter if you’re right, as long as they think you’re right. They will love you for it.
I really enjoyed today's 'rant'/moan, although it was from another freewheeling hermit, the world is becoming full of them it seems 😃. You've probably made yourself more attractive, so expect messages from lonely ladies ...or men, whatever, I stay away from admitting to my odd behaviour, it does trigger interest in those that want to convince themselves that you/we haven't met the right person yet, which is what they are, not my problem, not my concern, I just like being left alone until I need interesting company 😂 ...whatever. 🙄
It depends on the person, it could also be unhealthy to be around toxic people.i think we all need to think for ourselves because we can all create our own beliefs and ideas.
I’ve been married twice. I have two grandchildren and two children. I love them and they love me….I am at an age where my friends are for the most part, female. We are desperately close, whilst owning our independence. I choose to be alone, and am working towards a totally‘alone’ lifestyle in my final years. Detachment from the onslaught of what society expects is enervating. I’ll take my lifestyle, thanks.
It's in the news. But I think it refers to people who aren't alone by choice. My experience is the worst feelings of loneliness arise in bad marriage. I've had four and it always happened. Introverts have high standards for time spent with others. For that reason I would long for a better, deeper intimacy. At the same time I'd wish I were alone.
I've heard that it's unhealthy to be lonely. Big difference. Voluntary hermits do not suffer in their solitude, but lonely people struggle with it, and so can become ill.
Introverts are enately threatening to extroverts who represent 70% of the population and never further the culture because extroverts are meddling conformists and are suspisious of independant thought.😊
I got to about 3min 55 seconds and then thought, 'Why am I listening to this guy when I'm happier with my own thoughts?'. Thanks for setting me right. Bye!
Come on. Don’t be that guy. The ‘you are using tech’ meme is such a disreputable sideshit. Come up with something original, not something you saw on TikTok
I’m also tired of people who do not understand me or the idea of hermitage and are telling me this same crap that we are social creatures. If I have to have another small talk shallow conversation I’ll just blow lol. I wonder if the criticism of the liners bc being alone you do see the insanity and if more were alone maybe the world would be better.
I’m very introverted and find it often quite hard living with my husband and son as I like peace and quiet and nature and they like noisy tv shows and going to busy places. I love them of course but I’m so glad when they go out and I can have peace and quiet again.
I completely agree with you. I have been on my own since my divorce 14 years ago and even though i have four children who are married, i prefer to be alone and i even refuse a family get together. To many people in one place is so overwhelming as i am now used to my own space. Basically, i function better alone and i am able be in a stable state of mind. I am a hermit!
We are so alike.
Yes
My mother always told me I was going to grow up to be a hermit if I didn't start to come out and associate with people. Well, she nailed it..I love my private life. I do have acquaintances, but everything and every one are kept at arms length. I don't have visitors at my cabin in the woods up on the mtn. I feel safe and secure. Time is irrelevant at home. I'm at peace within myself and feel this is the path God wants me on. God Bless
Perfect ❤
100% agree. I'm an introvert and love living on my own. My furry companion is a cat. I also prefer not to meet people when I'm out in nature. I thrived in lockdowns. Currently I work 12 hours on Saturday and Sunday and have 5 days off. It's great.
I am 63 yrs old and feel the same. I'm a female who just divorced by my choice because i want to live in the country. I've just purchased 1.7 acres of land in Northwest Washington state, USA.
I can't tell you how happy I am to be finally be realizing my dream I've had since a child.
I've alway felt strange for wanting to go live in the woods. No one i knew felt this way.
In America, you would be considered 'weird' for not wanting to be a part of the growing masses living in chaos striving for more.
Give me a simple home, a simple life. Quite.....
Good for you... what an adventure, Id like to do the same. One comment I have, is that city urban living has become unspeakably noisy, with leaf blowers, loud exhausts, running machinery everywhere, music on iphones eveywhere.... and so to move to the country would be a blissful beneficial escape from all that >>>> ; "less noise" x " a number of years" = " lots of unwanted noise "
Well done
@@SIERRATREESso true! I moved to the country and they built it up all over the place and now it’s noisy, just like your explanation. So I need to move again! And this time I’ll try to go where there are no other people at all! Just animals and trees and Nature .
@@shaash5236 Go for it. Im also after no light pollution, I want to see the stars.
When I was a young girl I told my Mum that I wanted to live in a cave. Although married, I spend many hours alone. I don't live in a cave but I do live a reclusive life, by choice. Thanks for another great video! 😊
I am alone due to things of my own making. Some of which were not good and some were. But today is what I have and I chose not to bother or inconvienience anyone with my own life. While I sometimes enjoy company of others, I chose to live a quiet life alone and try to make each day a good day.
We are introverts! We enjoy our own company and love the alone time to think and philosophise! Solitude is a form of freedom! 🥰🙌🏽
You get it…
Sometimes, as some social obligation looms I get anxious, and decide not to go ; this is followed by a tremendous sense of relief, a high of sorts. The evening will then be spent reading or studying something fascinating.
@@SIERRATREES Ha! That is exactly how I feel. I really should get out more, but if you’re happy, you’re happy. 😊
@@MomeGnome I think we are on the same wavelength. 😊
Man stands alone . peace my friend.i have been alone for 25 years I'm a happy man
We can be happy in our own heads
Totally agree! I've been on my own for many years and can't imagine having someone else living with me. I do have 3 kids and 4 grandchildren, all living in the same town, and don't spend much time with them. I love them dearly, but I love my time to myself.
I've been fairly content alone on my land for the last 20 years. I allowed a young 'van-lifer' to have an overwintering parkup from last September. It was ok for awhile, but his need for company and regular borrowing of tools has worn me down, so after a long 7 months he's been given a leave-by date. At 30yo, he reminds me too much of my young self.....knowing how to fix the world, multiple unstarted business ideas, expounding on philosophies and the words of esoteric gurus whilst not practicing with fortitude himself. I won't be inviting overwinterers again, as the company of friends and occasional visits from family is perfection enough. And marriage, I'll never curse myself with again. I've my woodland, stone, clay, artbooks, and swallows nesting in my barn. Sit on my steps at dusk with a bottle of McEwan's Champion, and watch the bats emerge from my timberwork. No hassle, no pressure.....
A beautiful life 🤗
Sounds good,. Books, hobbies and nature,,
Last year, i went down with an illness that has left me virtually housebound. I was amazed to find i love being alone. Being excluded from the hustle and bustle of ordinary life is like a weight being lifted off my shoulders. I love my family and wouldn't want to be without them, but otherwise, im quite content to see other people occasionally. If i want company, I usually come and find it on CZcams.
We are very much the same. My recent cancer has precluded me from society even more. Society tells us it’s wrong not to be a member of the tribe/hive. The more people who think that the better, as far as I’m concerned. 😊
@primalengland Exactly. When people act incredulous that we like being alone, they justtaped a sign to their forehead telling us to avoid them.😂
@@Liberal.Linda. I’m ok with that! 😂
Although some of us enjoy being alone we still need human contact but on our own terms. The lesson for me is respecting people's boundaries so we can all get along. Much love to you all.
That is so true. I interact, but prefer my own company. I would never feel comfortable invading someone’s boundaries or forcing my company on others. In today’s world it seems almost mandatory to make sure everyone around you is aware of your opinions.
The irony is that by being true to yourself seeking the peace of mind offered by solitude your creative talent has flowered and through the technology available you are making true connection to thousands of other minds who are benefiting from your wonderful insights and reflections and by sharing the beauty of nature. Bingo! To me you are demonstrating that taking care of the Self is actually a way to give to humanity so Thank you for respecting your own needs and thereby giving to all of us who enjoy your wonderful videos. 🙏💚🤸♂️
Isn’t this just the perfect circle of life. Learning and giving back and learning….
@@primalengland yes very true, giving life meaning and purpose 🙏💚
Subscribed. I just discovered your channel today, while looking for videos regarding hermits. So much of what you say reflects what I've come to believe. I'm almost 80 years old now; and at the moment I feel like you've been reading my mind. :)
Fantastic to learn that someone else ‘gets’ what I’m saying. Thanks for subscribing. Appreciated.
Hermit Card in Tarot really explains the meaning & I find this gentleman is also capturing the essence of Hermit energy.
Thank you so much.
I am a 100% an introvert so thoroughly enjoyed this video! It’s so nice when you can relate with others. From a child I’ve always felt something was wrong with me as I always felt out of place, stressed, and exhausted being around others. I am completely at ease as I understand me now☺️
Glad you liked it. Sounds like we are on the same wavelength. 😊
I am just like you - I live alone and love my own company. I never get lonely or bored and I do not need to be entertained. I love going out into nature alone to spend time looking at a river and watching all the wildlife around me. To me that is Heaven. I do it often because I also know it is good for my mental and physical health. I too live in my head, but I can still my thoughts whenever I choose so as to enjoy the peace and solitude deeply. Ours is a life of joy and bliss and we wouldn't give it up for anything.
Thanks Nigel... another 'down to earth' video. I've just watched your video re 'Hermit' I couldn't watch it all along as when I'd see the word 'Hermit' it straightaway remains me of my Dad & he passed over 11 yrs ago! So... about 15 years ago.. I remember him sitting smoking his pipe & looking out on to the mountain behind my parents house & him saying (privately) to me that "he could easily become a hermit" I was making tea & stopped in my tracks... as... I just couldn't grasp what he said. He did explain why.. & he did love his wife & family but he yearned 'no people & especially no gossip & valued nature in all her Glory' It's taken me until about 2 years ago to realise what he meant & I fully 'get it' & I too yearn for 'solitude' & could become a ... part-time Hermit! I mentioned in another comment about living in a large town & have tried to move & used 'positive thinking etc' but reality is needed too. Sorry... long comment ... I don't expect anybody to read. Regards. Rose 🦋
Your dad sounds like a wise man. I think it has to be in our makeup to yearn for these things. When feelings like this are in your dna, you just can’t deny it. Thank you for the comment, Rose. ❤️🌹
@primalengland He was 🪷.
Thank you for taking your valuable 'time' to read my comment & reply. 'Time' to give to people.. in my opinion is a wonderful - gift. I wish people when meeting up in say a cafe... would put their phones away & be present. Regards. Rose 🌼
Never feel guilty about being a solitary but good man.
Your honesty is so, so refreshing. To enjoy your own company as much as you do is the greatest form of self-love.
I adore my husband and my family, but my alone time is something I need for my own well being. It is an absolute must-have!
❤👍LOL For years I've called myself a "hermit-ess" & really enjoy the peace and quiet, of country, and even more so as I age, I'm 70, yet I refuse to grow old.
Often I only go to town, once a month and talk to people then, as I live in a friendly state. But then I can go home.
This week more trips to a yard sale and auction, so more speaking to people other than my cat. My kids only text and never call. And maybe camping out, but I can always go back to my home base camp and my own space. And as you said, do what I like. With no interference.
I'm really glad that I came across your channel and wise thoughts and words. Keep them coming 🙋
I love that..."hermit-ess" 💚Although we both like to be alone, we could probably be good friends. A simple life with my cat. Dreams of living in the country in a "friendly state?" Which state is that? I'm in Cali. People are a mix of hot and cold. Protecting property and privacy, always on the top of the list for most. Easy to be alone. A sense of community harder to find when you want it ,or need it. Be well.
@@dorisemone6778 Hey dori, thanks for noticing my comment. I too once upon a time lived in Cali, long before it was called that. Have family buried there, tho they weren't from there. I've lived in many places and, yes I do miss some. But it seems like the beautiful places soon become over run , with too many sheeple. For now I'm in the central US, Nebraska. Where abouts is your area?
@@crazylady.. South coast area. Always thinking of moving. Miss the seasonal changes. Originally from the East Coast. No problem living a slow life. I have perfected the art of "down time." LOL! Just found this channel. Really liking it! Take care. Be well.
@@dorisemone6778 dori, my daughter in law is from that big city, on that southern coast, family is buried far inland east from there. They moved there for the drs across that southern fence. Me? I've always been part gypsy with itchy feet, so understand, the wanting to move. And something else to consider, is there's so many areas, that are so much cheaper to live in than where you are now. Even though so many states have changed drastically, and become expensive, than such as Montana, everyone now wants to live there, and have brought all their city with them, changing it all so much.
I prefer driving for miles, and seeing very few vehicles. 😁 But then again, I am rather selfish, 😊🙋♀️
.@@crazylady.."gypsy with itchy feet!" I like that! LOL! Any suggestions? Affordable, (friendly) places to live and age well? I already live a simple, quiet life, and plan my errands around avoiding traffic and people. Too fast and furious here for me. Trees, rivers, birds, and changing seasons for me!😸
I'm in the midst of discovering what really, truly feels like my authentic self on every level. I have been accepting this hermit aspect of myself and learning how to navigate it. It's been challenging with people who feel they have a need of me and that I am obligated, which most people like this do not accept the fact that nobody is actually obligated to them. Needing something is valid, but impeding on someone else's boundaries as a means to an end is much more selfish than the hermit who said 'no'. The world is not full of hermits so there is no reason for the hermit to be expected to conform to the majority of non-hermits.
I am mentally and physically unwell when this boundary is not honored. It's not selfish to live my life to my standards. I am so grateful to be married and happy together with someone who is much like me and also very unique and different from me.
Ah! But…. Society. Society tells us what’s best for us. There would be so many more happy people in the world if we all had the strength of will to tell society to go and do one. 😊
Something soothing about walking alone in the hillside, lake district, snowdonia etc. Even better if you have a Dog, a bit of wild camping etc, bliss.
That’s all I’ve ever done…, it’s enough
Oh. CZcams algorithm suggested this. Well found a male alter ego. This is my life. Me, my dog and outdoors. Slow, small, simple, silent , still.
I’m looking into a mirror. That’s me. 😊
Just love this ramble today. New to your channel. You and Molly have a nice life. Your words resonate with me. Thanks.
Thank you so much for the lovely comment. 😊
@@primalengland You are quite welcome.😸
I'm a popular loner. I know alot of people but you'll mostly find me on my own. I have a husband & a 17 year old son. Obviously I'm with them daily but i also have a lot of alone time, I need that. I love my own company ❤
I think we are very similar. Community loners. At home and at peace in both environments.
Hello, Nigel-I’m a new subscriber to your channel. After losing my husband to the ravages of Type-1 diabetes, and with absolutely no desire to even attempt to find his replacement, I’m slowly learning to embrace the thing that used to frighten me: solitude, which had always been synonymous to loneliness for me. It’s good to find a voice out there extolling the joys of solitude.
I’m sorry to hear about your husband. I hope you can find peace and happiness. I’m one of those people who is lucky enough to find contentment in solitude. It can be a nice place to be. ❤️
@@primalengland You’re very kind. Thank you. I’m finally at a place along what had once been a path shrouded entirely by the shadows of the past but now has sunlight filtering through the darkness with promises of a peaceful, contented life that’s just ahead of me.
@@cherilynne1946 I’m a believer in time being a great healer. I always say that tears of grief eventually turn in to tears of happy memories tinged with melancholy.❤️
@@primalengland I’d always heard that “time is the greatest healer,” but when I was drowning in wave after wave of grief, I was certain that whoever coined that phrase was full of rubbish. The loss of someone you dearly love creates an emptiness that can never be filled. And while I still believe that, time does heal the wound to the point in which the rawness and the pain are eased. The soft scar remains and becomes part of who you are. It’s up to each of us to either let the scar define us or not. I choose the latter.
@@cherilynne1946 I’ve lost only two really close people, lots of friends, but not desperately close. One was my dad, who died young, the other was my fiancé who died many years ago from cancer. I still think of her a lot. She was the most beautiful person I have ever met, both inside and out. I kept a couple of photographs of us, and when I look at them I find myself smiling, but with a tear in my eye. Her name was Catherine.
“All humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room on his own “ Blaise Pascal French Philosopher and Mathematician 1654 🙏
Perfect.
Agree…also the last four years has divided people even more and that makes it even harder to talk with others,people who believe what they were told and had all those procedures …the world is nothing like we think it is and once you see that you can be set more free…like you mention the constant news and BS….to spark up conversation with possible like minded folk can be hard…
Much easier being alone….🙂👍🏻
The lockdown left a lasting legacy of mistrust and caution. It will take a long time to go back to factory settings.
Love this, I have always loved my own company and have been in hermit mode for most of my life as best as am able, bar my kids, some family and a couple of friends who I tolerate mostly haha The older I get the more I need peace! I have a sign on my gate which reads Have A Lovely Day, Somewhere Else! Unfortunately people think it is a joke.
We are kindred spirits. All I need now is the sign. 😊
I really appreciate what you're saying here. Subscribed for more like this. Gratitude.
Thank you so much.
You speak to my soul. Subscribed.
Horses for courses, be a funny world if we were all the same. Nice one 👍🏻
I think of myself as introverted and too much interaction with people wears me out. Comfortable by myself with just some interaction. I really liked being married but widowed, I can embrace enjoying the quiet life and exploring all that is me without stopping to be a wife with set duties and compromising. Except for my persistent cat, Tort, who has few needs and is a joy. And cuddles up wondrously on cold nights.
After a bad divorce I found peace in my solitude ,I can sleep when I want and no petty arguments.
I’ve been divorced twice and always extol the virtues of doing what the hell you want when the hell you want. 😊
I've always known I was an introvert, I just didn't know there was a name for it until a few years ago! When I found out the traits I thought OMG that's me, it's normal! We are very alike 🐕
Believe it or not
Being a hermit or a shut in as they call it
Is the ACTUAL real reason for sweetest day
Yes😊
Yes🎉
Thanks for that Nigel, your posts are so honest and relatable I love tuning in. I would love to wander in beautiful isolated places but being female I have been conditioned since childhood to stay away from these places and stay in busy places which I dislike for safety reasons. Maybe I should adopt a big mean looking dog to accompany me and my beagle 😂blessings to you and Molly 🥰
Big mean dog or some big mean walking companions. I think we are all aware of the perils faced by females on their own. Such a sad reflection of these times.
@@primalengland could try bribing my sons to come along 😁
@@user-mf2lv5jh3n I’m not a ‘group’ player, but they are out there. Shame not to enjoy the remote Beauty.
Even though my husband and I share (note share ) a house.. I consider my self a recluse.. most of the time .. I like my own company my own thoughts my own life..
I'm more like an in-between person. I love people and go shopping once a week for food and to be social, then I love my alone life with my cats as well.
I love it that Molly foung a place to lie down and be on camera too. Cute.
She is fabulous. ❤️
I believe in soulmates, but I'm not sure everyone will find one. There's nothing as beautiful as beauty that is shared. I used to make yammering rationales to justify my depressive lonely state, but I was in denial. So much goes unseen in this world as long as we listen to the clattertrap dialog of our minds.
I have one friend. I never had many, and most are now gone. My one friend is the opposite sex, a bit younger, but we just gel. The only person I can feel truly relaxed with. I don’t do idle chatter. It feels like a waste of energy. I’d rather be alone with my thoughts…. and my dog. 🐶😊
I too love my own company. I have joined a social group but I now have too many friends. I state I am having a quiet time at home only to find they take no notice. They pop round for an unarranged visit or talk ages on the phone.. HELP... I yearn for my life I had before. ❤
we evolved in family groups and villages. I think we thrive in a village environment where you are helped thorough life by family and community and you in turn, help others, women with children in particular. The lonely, depressed city dweller is surrounded by people but knows no-one. Is he a hermit...or a victim of modern society? Some choose to avoid social contact and limit interactions because people 'do their heads' in'. Possibly, historical hermits were much like that.
The idea of Hermits was usually linked to a kind of religious servitude. I think your analogy nails it, though. I think that definition applies to me, pretty much. I always hated crowds and found them intimidating. I would eschew cities like the plague. My childhood holidays were always in remote areas where we spent our time climbing and exploring. My father was a headteacher, watercolour artist and musician. A very beautiful man. I think I was always destined to strive to live my best life inside my own small orbit.
the singing bowl shop? I’ve had a few singing bowls over the years. I record and busk handpans, Rav drums and Gouda drums. I also record for my bandcamp channel using lots of percussion. I’ve been a percussionist since I played with Pete Shelley in the pre Buzzcocks band about a thousand years ago. Getting into Nordic sounds lately and recorded a little Viking saga thing. Very simple, but I enjoyed it.
You put this so perfectly. I couldn't have said it any better myself.
Thank you. 😊
Okay relative to what? From what perspective, by what metrics, at what time, in what sense? Why even ask the question?
I was always alone, for one reason or another. I know all the different allegorical structures, all the different psychological architectures, emotional curves, the basis and genesis of living this way or that, what it affords, what it deprives, what happens if a given state or frame of life is disrupted or is made too prolonged, fixation on utility and intstrumentality, engulfment terror, rejection of intimacy, fatigue at the sheer stupidity of the average person, looking back and mourning what's gone and now can never be made up for, wanting to escape the game and being trapped amidst the predator and prey herd animal dynamic inherent to the degenerate trauma bonded human livestock farm posing as a society. All of it. My opinion is that it's a question that isn't worth asking. People who know, know. People who don't, don't.
There's a difference also between people who were there, and then left it. And people who watched the world as though through a small window with a thick pane of glass, then finally separated from it entirely. These two are not the same, at all. One had and gave it up. The other never had.
A lot of human existence is actually an unconscious telepathic process. However on another layer it's essentially might makes right. "Justice is for the strong". If you're hermit and the others have their natural tendency towards gradual diffusion, you'll be displaced over and over again, and the system they abide by will give them the right. Unless, again, you have the right internal organization to make it so they cannot displace you. Which I suppose for a hermit may well become the goal, immunity. Separation and individuation. Invulnerability, absolute control, and exemption from the natural order.
The last sentence was pretty accurate…..
Yh i agree i dont have friends which suits me, but i hate all this everyone has to know everything about you and your life. Ive got family and neighbours who want to micro manage my partner and i life It never used to be like that
No it didn’t used to be like that. I think that if you excuse yourself often enough, people gradually start leaving you alone. That may not please them, but that’s their problem. 😊
How about using the term "Loner" rather than "Hermit"? I think it would be more accurate. However, the social folk will never understand them whatever you call them. Having said that, I agree with everything you say.
We are introverts!
I’m surprised to hear you express the same sentiments about being alone that I have.
There are many of us out there, but so many buckle under the wishes of others and just conform.
When your viewers comment here, as I am now, it's like the old days when you would get a pen pal and exchange letters. You would never meet, usually. It was as slow as the mail and pleasant. So commenting here, is a pen pal writing back to you.
mee tooo
the fewer people around you the less bullshit you have to listen to.
100 %
I’m a 51 year old introvert and my mum an extrovert seems to think there is something wrong with me and has always tried to force me to socialise. I feel this is the wrong thing to do if you have an introvert child. She still does this so she’s not going to change. Being made to feel there is something wrong with me for being an introvert has damaged my self esteem
My son is in his mid thirties now, but spent most of his life as a very introverted kid. It worried us enormously, but mainly because he was bullied at school. I just encouraged him to do what he wanted, just like my dad did, me. He is now a university lecturer in 3D art and a very successful musician. He is still very introverted, and this causes issues when people press him to do things. I just leave him to himself, letting him know I’m always there. We cannot impose our lifestyle choices on others. We can always just ramble on about it like I do. 😁
@@primalengland I wish my parents had the same attitude as you and your dad.
@@primalengland Very wise to let children be 'true' to themselves... especially in their formative years = the building blocks for life. That's fabulous about your son... fair play + well done. Regards. Rose 🦋
Hi Nigel Agi here from Canada. Just found you. Kindered spirit. Love your hermit videos. I’m one. In a big way.
Silly question. I’m debating going into landscaping horticulture as a second job. I’m 47. Do you think it’s too old to start? The plant natural world is better suited to me these days. I have a chance to start a second career and I’m passionate about horticulture landscape plant work. Is there a too old?
Absolutely never too old. I was always a keen gardener and did a lot of garden design. I lost my business, but then my friend bought a house with a huge garden. I have been there today working on it. Horticulture as a career is just a hobby with the added stress of pleasing the customer. Just make sure you have an answer to all their horticultural questions. It doesn’t matter if you’re right, as long as they think you’re right. They will love you for it.
Why wouldn't it be? Who gives the ok? ME!!! Proud hermit here :)
Hi! Fellow hermit. Fellow appreciator of everything big or small .❤️
I really enjoyed today's 'rant'/moan, although it was from another freewheeling hermit, the world is becoming full of them it seems 😃.
You've probably made yourself more attractive, so expect messages from lonely ladies ...or men, whatever, I stay away from admitting to my odd behaviour, it does trigger interest in those that want to convince themselves that you/we haven't met the right person yet, which is what they are, not my problem, not my concern, I just like being left alone until I need interesting company 😂 ...whatever. 🙄
You have described me to a tee…🤗
There appears to be a heck of a lot of us out there. 😊
I get on my own nerves a lot of the time
ok with me ?
Follow your heart and don't should all over yourself! :)
You just summed up my life. X
what kind of camera were you using? i like the tracking
It’s a dji pocket 3. It has face tracking. They are hugely popular with bloggers.
thank you @@primalengland
To long didnt watch but its ok im sire of it
You are talking about 👁️ MY MU SELF 🧠 and Ethnic cleansing is not a GAME 👁️ Google 🍎 SHEIK Berber Ibn Ali 👻⚓ ERR 🦜 YEHUDA 🫁 AH 🧠🪄
Fab
Check one two lol
I have to wonder why you feel the need to make videos . . .it’s interesting isn’t it?
He certainly is. Hermit-ing doesn't mean giving up tech. We get the best of both worlds.
I heard that it’s unhealthy to be alone.
It depends on the person, it could also be unhealthy to be around toxic people.i think we all need to think for ourselves because we can all create our own beliefs and ideas.
I’ve been married twice. I have two grandchildren and two children. I love them and they love me….I am at an age where my friends are for the most part, female. We are desperately close, whilst owning our independence.
I choose to be alone, and am working towards a totally‘alone’ lifestyle in my final years.
Detachment from the onslaught of what society expects is enervating.
I’ll take my lifestyle, thanks.
It's in the news. But I think it refers to people who aren't alone by choice. My experience is the worst feelings of loneliness arise in bad marriage. I've had four and it always happened. Introverts have high standards for time spent with others. For that reason I would long for a better, deeper intimacy. At the same time I'd wish I were alone.
I've heard that it's unhealthy to be lonely. Big difference. Voluntary hermits do not suffer in their solitude, but lonely people struggle with it, and so can become ill.
Introverts are enately threatening to extroverts who represent 70% of the population and never further the culture because extroverts are meddling conformists and are suspisious of independant thought.😊
If you would fell in love....it would feel like a mentally earthquake.
😃😃😃
I got to about 3min 55 seconds and then thought, 'Why am I listening to this guy when I'm happier with my own thoughts?'. Thanks for setting me right. Bye!
Good for you, kiddo. I’m all about people living their own shit. Look for another channel. All the best, pal.
@@primalengland Another channel? Found it! Channel me. 🙂
Humans are social creatures. Its ok to disconnect feom the masses sometimes, but be must make an effort to interact once in a while.
No, people who need human interaction are social creatures. Some of us are completely fine without it.
@@buckwheat6245 But you felt the need to reply here on CZcams. The phone your using to reply on was made by other people.
Come on. Don’t be that guy. The ‘you are using tech’ meme is such a disreputable sideshit. Come up with something original, not something you saw on TikTok
I’m also tired of people who do not understand me or the idea of hermitage and are telling me this same crap that we are social creatures. If I have to have another small talk shallow conversation I’ll just blow lol. I wonder if the criticism of the liners bc being alone you do see the insanity and if more were alone maybe the world would be better.
Contradiction much