Sindhu Vee on raising teenagers
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- čas přidán 14. 11. 2022
- Stand-up comedian Sindhu Vee thinks that Western teenagers have got it too easy. She'd have never got away with the same excuses with her mum.
#standupcomedy #sindhuvee #parenting - Komedie
You can get more comedy from the genius mind of Sindhu Vee on our channel.
Yes please👍🌹
I f444444cking LOVE this! I laughed louder each of the six times I replayed it😆❤❤ You have a new subscriber...
🥰🤣🐛🦋🧞♀️🫂🙏🏻
Yes please I love her
"Genius" lmao come on bro. What about this premise, let alone joke structure, is anything above average?
She has that awesome teacher energy who's strict when she needs to be but is actually really fun.
this is my vibe and i don't believe children develop great on gentle parenting
YESSS I HAVE THAT TEACHER
@@luiserenner7147 Gentle parenting isn’t coddling kids tho it’s treating them like people rather than obedient dogs that aren’t allowed to speak for themselves. I never understood why parents need to have a power trip when raising kids, like I understand you need to establish some authority but you should at least listen and understand your kids. You should know when your kid is bullshiting you and when they are actually struggling.
I have a teacher like that
My physics teacher!!
The issue with teens is adults expecting the teens to behave like adults, while still treating them like children
EXACTLY!! MAKE IT MAKE SENSE PLEASE I AM STRUGGLING
@@krs9748that's not what they saying,
parents often expect their teens to act and behave like adults when teens don't know how to be adults whilst still having the same control and authority as when they were little as kids grow older the relationship changes from parents/child to peer-like
@@meerkat10 Ya I get that, I'm saying teens aren't supposed to be full adults
EXACTLYYYYYYY
@@krs9748not what the comment meant
Rapid hormone changes do cause unstable moods, but unequipped parents cause unstable teens
Virtually every parent is "unequipped". Kids don't come with an operator manual.
@@AlbredaWeldethat’s why there are books and professional advice on how to raise your kids
@@woo5249who needs books 😂 the universal language is enough. But that right has been taken away from you so next best is books lol. And you wonder why theres stabbing, beating teachers, mugging, misbehaving. The parents rights have been taken away.
@@AlbredaWelde There is such thing as being unequipped to handle interpersonal relationships/emotions well, though. Like, parent or not, there are people who learn and develop strong skills in terms of supporting others emotionally and reflecting on the ins and outs of their relationships to others. And just as someone can be well-equipped in that department before ever having kids, or without having kids at all in the end, so too can someone be completely unequipped in the same area, and decide to have kids.
Cause at the end of the day, if you're inexperienced dealing well with emotions and relating to other people generally, you're guaranteed to be bad at doing the same with a kid, since a parent-child relationship is like, a baseline interpersonal relationship then with extra challenges heaped on top.
@@aron2015i hope you don't breed... coz you sound like your child will be hiding lots of things from you because they can't trust you and will not be safe around you to speak their mind freely... you sound like my parents which is worse and i have depression because of unresolved trauma and i had to suppress my emotions and keep quiet or else one wrong thing will cause me a lot more mental trauma or worse, a chair or table being thrown at me until i bruised
That “Aaja” was the most menacing thing
The way I recoiled instinctively...
Aaja is more scary than anything else in the world 😭😭 i die inside when my mother says that to me 🥲
Can I ask what 'Aaja' means? Or the English equivalent?
It means "come" in a sarcastic manner@@JR-pf9in
@@Ivie._aig Thank you!
I have never heard a teenager say “it’s my hormones”😭
Nah they usually say something now about their mental health tbh.
There is always hype terms used as excuses.
When I was a teen, I just saw it as people around me/peers were all just being arrogant assholes.
Kind of, it's always about hormones really. Even as adults. People are just all unwell and imbalanced, and it's considered the norm. But it's not normal.
@@CaptainAMAZINGGG it is normal, everybody’s different (and that’s completely okay). It’s okay to have excuses (which hormones and mental health are both valid excuses) but make sure you own up to it and try to do better. Owning up, apologizing, and doing better is all it takes to be a good person. But you’ve also gotta think, a teenagers brain is very underdeveloped. I may have been mature for my age at 15 but I wasn’t as mature as I am now. I think way differently even tho it’s only a few years difference. Our brains are always growing if we let them, and a teenager who’s experiencing things they haven’t experienced before will probably be a bit of a dick. Idk if that makes sense but I hope it does :)
It's the society telling parents it's their hormones. Lol
@@RJ-kb3qfNo not everything is your hormones or mental health. It's a lack of parenting.
@@christineperez7562 then you still can’t blame the teenagers for that.. what is your point? Lmfao
“She would have had another child and raised it properly” 😝😘
Fantastic final line
That part!!!!
Yep I was waiting for the slipper/hanger/belt but the subtleness waa perfect
@@jeffsorrowsbringing back memories 😄
My parents had ten children and if we even thought about giving them crap my father would say he would get rid of us and make another one that looked just like us. I always wondered if had gotten rid of a couple siblings before I was born 😂
Every Indian felt that “Aaja” to their core 💀
With the look on her face and whole tone of that "Aaja" I felt it to my core, I'm not Indian and I don't know what it means exactly but I just know I shouldn't provoke that response.😳
It means come here. @@rustyhowe3907
@@rustyhowe3907 it means "come here" and if your parents say that, your should know that you've f#cked up big time
Don’t gotta be Indian to feel That one, my friend.
It’s all in the Delivery!😳
@@rustyhowe3907she said JUST one time, nope I'm good!
As a psych student, the reasons for teenagers sometimes struggling (because it's not always the case- most teens actually don't experience it strongly) is because they are going through one of life's crisis. You get them as a toddler, then teenager, then just as you turn into an adult, then sometimes in your middle age. Teenagers struggle because it's their FIRST TIMES experiencing: serious relationships/friendships, choosing their paths in life and already being pressured to know their priorities and how to sort them really fast, having to balance those new serious relationships while still having school duties and family duties, and on top of that their bodies and minds go through probably the biggest and fastest changes ever. So yes, hormones are one of the reasons making things difficult for teens, but it's also their brain structure changing and them learning what it means to build real connections, raise to everyone's expectations and choose their path asap. Our brains don't fully develop until we're about 30. That's why it's a sensitive time for their brains and a time when it's easier to develop mental health issues.
Also, everyone who shits on gentle parenting under this video clearly doesn't know what it really means. We learn about types of attachment to parents (created by Bowbly) and basically every type of attachment that isn't the safe type is harmful to your child. Gentle parenting should honestly just be called "regular parenting" because it should be the standard. Gentle parenting means that you don't yell at your children every time they do something wrong and that you don't ignore them or give them the silent treatment. But when they mess up, you ask them why it happened and you actually LISTEN to your child and treat them like a person who made a mistake instead of a pet who bit another pet. The results of abusive punishments on children are MASSIVE and parents sometimes don't realise how many things can be considered abuse. Silent treatment will cause your child to suck it up and never tell anyone they are hurting in their adult life, being aggressive towards your child might end up with them being terrified of conflict, mixing both up will make your child unstable and unable to build safe relationships cause they never know if they are safe or being punished etc. The attachment you make with your child will influence their future life and their own attachments to other people.
Well their brains aren't fully wired until 22 to 25 so it is a difficult period. Supportive loving parents who set clear and reasonable expectations is a wonderful and unfortunately rare thing
Rising up to expectations is what is causing all the stress. Whose expectations do you have to rise up to. Maybe your father has different expectations and your relatives or friends or the society has something else as expectations. Can you please all the people...No ..so focus on your goal and forget about others. Nothing matters more than your emotional health and you and only you are responsible for your mental health. Work on yourself for yourself and do your best. Only doing your best is in your hand. The result depends on your destiny. If result is not good then understand there is something else for you but keep trying to move ahead and grow in life. Don't give up ever. And you will be pleased that you tried
All drama teens problems comes from the BS from modern psychology
@junegray5301 maybe you just don't remember how it was to be a teenager 😅 and also, how do you know that modern psychology is "BS"? Are you an expert or something?
this has heavy "i got beat as a kid and turned out fine" energy 💀
I always found that saying funny because it's so contradictory lol.
@@neonraytracer8846 lmao my comment was literally about the abusive nature of parents like that, The "i got beat as a kid and turned out fine" thing is something a lot of parents actually tell their kids, mine did too. Everyone has rights but a lot of parents do not understand that and will do anything in their power to force these rights away from their child, until they have to leave from simply not being able to stand their parents anymore and wanting to be treated decently. My own parents were very abusive, therefore i think i'm absolutely qualified to joke about my own trauma. But thanks for the psychiatric analysis i guess lol
@@hel2727 ikr lmao
@@hi-rh9cq you can't expect people to know those thing about you. You could have elaborated a bit, or went /s, or something. I was having a rough day, sorry for lashing out.
Please please please, if you do have kids, do not give them everything. There's this whole circle of how kids of X kind of parent makes another X kind of parent, and it all circles. Break the mold.
And hey, have a good one and take care. People will find ways to love you not matter what ❤️
@@hi-rh9cq PERIOD. GO. OFF. this is exactly what i thought and yes it’s funny but it gets old when i hear comedians start off with saying something along the lines of KIDS THESE DAYS bc ik EXACTLY how it’ll go, “MYYYYYY parentsssss”- SUCKED. we know. u don’t get to invalidate kids now it rlly is a different time and it rlly depends on how u raise ur kid- beating never works for true better it just scares them and unfortunately LOTS of parents do it EXACTLY for that reason I’m POSITIVE if i said that to an older parent who beats they’d be like yea… that’s the point. like babe ur child is AFRAID OF U. and then they grow up indoctrinated with this ideology thinking it’s ok even if they would never do it to their kids, they validate it happening to them and think they deserved it
It's sad that there aren't a lot of parents who know a good middle of parenting. It seems like it's either they let themselves be walked on by their kids or discipline them in ways that traumatize them for the rest of their life 💀
I am not a parent, yet, but I always believed that kids needed a good scolding sometimes, when they didn't do anything TOO bad, and a good spanking other times, like when they throw a stone on someone, or hit someone in any way, or steal, or something that is really bad, because otherwise a kid won't understand why that is wrong, the kid didn't get hurt, the kid might've been yelled at only, but the kid won't understand what pain is, and why the kid shouldn't hit others, and absolutely never hit a kid on the head and face, maybe the buttocks or the palms.
My parents, when I was younger, would get angry at me for what I thought was no reason. I'd suck my anger and frustration up and apologise, just so they wouldn't be mad. When they'd ask me what I was apologising for, I'd list off any complaints they had and anything I had done in the past few hours.
Fortunately, they understand me more now, and communication makes everything so much easier. If they get angry, I leave and then later ask them why. They explain and I can understand their perspective, as well as them understanding mine.
It might not work for everyone, but punishment without understanding just hurts the child. Just like with any animal, positive reinforcement works best. If they child understands why what they did is wrong and harmful, they are much less likely to do it again.
It seems the best way to raise a kid is to treat them like. A person. Who would've thought.
I've lived a major part of my life analysing my mom's tone when she calls my name.. just to know if she's angry or normal
Imagine being “traumatised” because your parent slapped you one day. I got the shit beat of of me. Black eyes broken bones and I’m more than glad they did that. Then I look at America and it’s filled with gay snowflakes that cry when you say boo to them and look for sympathy from the world. Raise your kids right and firm. They’re dumb kids who need to know the world is a dog eat dog world and you need to be strong and understanding but you won’t get that by asking your kid to stop 😂😂🤡🤡🤡❄️❄️❄️
Love it when comedians say the stupidest shit ever and yet still sound like they're making a good point because it was funny. Humour is hands-down the most powerful psychological weapon you can harness
Nah, we all do it nowadays. By embracing your flaws and announcing them as quirks, no matter what shit you do you'll feel better about it because that's bravery. Development. Unique.
this comment is so real
Part of a parent's job is to teach their kids to act right despite the hormones. Or find other adults who can. Honestly sometimes I think parents are the worst people for the job. As a teen I thought the hormone thing was complete nonsense and I was naturally bad and lazy person, especially when my parents were around. Whenever they asked me to do things, I had such a strong negative reaction, but I didn't realise how excessive it was, especially as a teenager. Then I left the house and I calmed down a bit, but it would come back fullforce when I visited in my early twenties, I didn't show it anymore, I had more control than that and it was such a ridiculous reaction I didn't want to let it out, but I couldn't seem to stop feeling excessively annoyed if my parents asked me to set the table, even if I intended to set it before they ever asked me. I kept trying to figure out if I had some deep-seated unresolved resentment toward my parents. Then I reached the age where we apparently really stop growing 25 or so, and from one year to the next all that disappeared. Poof, no more. That's when I realised hormones might actually be a thing. It doesn't mean teenagers should get a pass, on the contrary they need to know how to recognise when they are overreacting, but it is important to understand that it's not a lie when they feel things so strongly and aren't exactly sure where it's coming from.
My mom would say, "I understand it's your hormones; but you rule your emotions. Your emotions don't rule you. Check yourself. Now go clean the bathroom."
the problem is when parents say that to children with literal mental disorders. like my parents
edit: since people accusing me of being lazy and not contributing, 3 things
1) you missed the point. i am saying that if you cant emotionally connect to your child and help them through their struggles then you are doing irreperable damage to them and your relationship
2) i DO contribute as best i can while balancing school and 2 jobs
3) i also have a physical disability that makes it excruciting for me to walk, which makes it hard to do chores that require standing. which is most of them
@@getspaded You can't ignore disorders that need help! But the goal is to understand, *treat, and become functional, not excuse inappropriate behavior.
@@NaturalAegyo parents who respond with this kind of thing DO ignore those problems. i had to get access to mental health support entirely on my own
@@getspaded You're making a generalization based on your bad experience. I'm not sure how many parents seek mental health care for their children. For the most part people do the best they know how. I'm sorry if yours missed the mark. I hope you're doing better now and have worked it out with your family.
if I said the same thing to my mom My mom gonna smack the shit out of me
Parents be like: I'll treat you the way my parents treated me even though it was traumatic
This
I never get parents who chose to do that. It's like they think being miserable is a right of passage, or it's unfair in the same way bozos think "why should /they/ get student debt forgiveness if I didn't". Truly pathetic stuff
@@mspaint93 because its how they were taught to raise children and its very difficult to change the cycle if they dont want to see the trauma's it caused them
this doesn't even work I was beaten and it made me even more rebellious
My mom has done this, I remember saying "how would you feel if grandma did that to you!" After something awful she did. And her only response was, your grandmother did do it to me. And I realized how effed she was for not realizing that makes it WORSE. I have broken every cycle with my kids. I am firm and they respect and love me because I love them and discipline them in reasonable ways
“Can you bring it here your hormones?” 😂😂😂 the kids sealed it for me! 😂😂😂
now that i’m 20 i can confidently say that a lot of it was hormones but the rest was usually because people either treat you like a child or an adult, they never just treat you like a teenager..
I currently have three teenagers. I have no flipping clue what i'm doing. I mean how do you treat someone like a teenager when it is right between adult and child? Like a drunk adult? A mature child?
I finally decided that at the end of the day they're going to do exactly what I did when I was a teenager... What I wanted to do, regardless of consequences. The best I can hope is to guide them because that's my job. The whole point is to take a child and raise them to be a self sufficient adult...while not warping them too bad.
Not gonna lie though I would trade both kidneys for a manual..
Eta... Chapter 12 would definitely be...Don't show your kids pictures of meth addicts in the hope of keeping them away from drugs, no matter how effective your teacher friend says it is because all you will do is scare the absolute bejeezus out of them...
My mom taught me about teenagers frontal lobes not being fully developed, causing mood swings, impulsive behavior and lack of understanding consequences of your own actions.....
I was a gooood kid, but man, I threw that in her face whenever i did misbehave 😂😂😂 Often it worked. Luckely I was the least rebelish person ever.
The most rebellious thing I did as a teenager was stay at Barnes and Nobles for too long.
@@a.b.2405 Hey! Barnes and nobles is a beautiful trap for all book lovers!
Oh my gosh Lmao ok good to know for when I have kids, be understanding but keep why to myself
Looks like she did a good job then.
@@nela3986 You should meet my littlesister then 😂🤯😵💫
My mom is the best
I know it's a joke but a parent can know it's because of hormones and still decipline teens
It really just helps the parents understand why things are happening instead of thinking it's a personality problem with their child or taking it personally and getting frustrated.
Honestly helps both parents and children
Or it's a way of giving a human being an excuse for being crappy all the time and absolving them of responsibility for their behavior. What is the point of disciplining to change behavior if you're programming that person to believe they are never in control of their behavior?
@@mewho6199 : you have a brain. Please use it. Try some balance .
@@mewho6199 it’s more like being able to identify the problem which helps you understand how to control it, not that it is uncontrollable.
@@mewho6199 it’s more about understanding that they are undergoing hormonal changes that affect their decision making processes…it is not a parents job to punish a child for going through the natural developmental processes of puberty, they are supposed to educate and guide them on how to adapt to these changes in mind, body, and brain so that they can become a healthy, happy, individual. These hormones level out as one ages and the prefrontal cortex doesn’t develop until age 25 so maintaining grace for your child is essential. That being said…this is just a stand up routine 😅😅 i don’t think it’s meant to be taken that seriously that’s why it’s a joke :)
@@mewho6199 you aren't programming anything. You're acknowledging that emotions and stimuli can be difficult to process and working with your child to understand them correctly instead of punishing them for it. Statistically, this type of parenting produced happier, more successful offspring.
A teenager definitely has sudden anger issues, irritability, emotional ups and downs which can be the result of hormones because their body is changing, but this changes can be channeled in a proper way by putting them in music class, fitness class like pilates and sports class, which will regulate their hormones and make them more than happy...I did that for my teenage daughter and son and though I can see their aggressiveness, they also can be easily calmed down....
That " Aja " got me cracked 🤣🤣🤣🤣
“And she would have had another child and raised it properly” 😂😂😂😂 I felt that
Same
😂
@@someblaqguy yuhh
that made laugh a lot when she said that lol 😆
And that same “well raised child” would have cut all contact with the mother as soon as they moved out :)
I had a talk with my parents recently about how was I as a teenager. And they said that they realized i was rebellious even during my childhood. Because of this, they decided to be more open-minded and give me more freedom to decide for myself BUT always with proper guidance. This way I would always be aware of the consequences of my actions. My mother was a product of very strict upbringing and she didn't want me to experience the same kind of treatment.
I'm so lucky to have them as parents so I passed on the same discipline to my son who fortunately grew up to be a responsible and loving young man.
I was such an anxious mess that my parents didn’t need to punish me because I was terrified of people not liking me. Skip a few years and now I’m prescribed anxiety meds cause my anxiety was so bad it was harming my physical health as well😅
" just come here, i won't hit you I promise!"
😂😂😂
and i did, only to get grabbed by the hair and slapped around the house for half an hour while being screamed at ....... because my mother didn't understand that I DIDN'T DO WHAT SHE WAS ACCUSING ME OF, SHE DID.
@@PsychoticFruitflyI'm so sorry, you didn't deserve that ♡
Parents don’t excuse bad behavior with “it’s hormones”, but hormones can explain the reason why teenagers might suddenly start reacting in ways they hasn’t previously. You can still discipline your child in a healthy way, while understanding that their body is changing 😅
Exactly. And it's not just hormones. Teens are in that awkward phase where they're learning to think for themselves, but their brains are not fully developed yet.
Being an Indian I remember my mom saying this about my brothers temper but I wasn’t allowed to act the same at the same age. How good right.
Please explain white peoples and gun violence then. White boys shooting up schools has turned into white men shooting up stores. And somehow they get taken into custody alive……
@@shifakhan4392well, Asia worships boys. As an Asian girl, I felt this.
Bro I agree with you :)
I’ve never heard anyone say “my hormones” as an excuse
Indian people are just weird.
Same, I actually get mad when my family blows off my problems as “hormones” when I just want them to be serious for one moment and not think everything is a joke.
@@t.q.quinn25 same, I bring up an issue with my mom and she writes it off as hormones then wonders why I don't have deep convos with her 💀
Same.
I mean there are times where I do want to say to my parents, "it's my hormones", which is when I get moody before my period and my parents are worried because I'm crying due to mood swings
I feel like most of the problems are not really hormone problems, but rather because of the brain not done with developing.
I have PMDD. Every hormone support group, I can assure you, is "but it's my hormones." I stopped blaming that and am finally taking responsibility and am finally healing.
My kids weren't stroppy like that because I didn't worry about things that didn't affect me, such as whether the kid made their bed or cleaned their rooms (other than to keep it vacuumed and pest-free).
Instead I gave them choices, asked questions to make them think, and only ever said a hard NO when their choices were a danger to themselves or others. Everything else they got to experience their own mistakes without me telling them I told you so.
The kids learned to make their beds and clean their rooms when they got tired of losing things in there and I wouldn't help find them, or when they got tired of being embarrassed to have friends over. They're now successfully independent adults and we still talk even though I'm "just" the stepmom and not with their dad anymore.
This is giving "I got beat as a child but I can't beat my kid but I want to, so I'll just resent them" energy
As an American teen I hate it because whenever I know I'm in the wrong, or if I express feelings of any kind and try to have a serious discussion with an adult about it, I'm met with "oh it's ok, you didn't mean it, it's just your hormones" and "you'll get over it, it's just your hormones" "teenagers and their hormones, they just complain all the time." It makes it so nothing related to me is ever taken seriously.
Now that I'm nearly an adult and I've seen a psychiatrist, those hormones turned out to be 5 undiagnosed mental disorders that have gotten bad to a horribly extreme level due to being undermined and untreated. Stop with the hormone excuse and just talk to your kid like a normal person, and if they fuck up talk to them about why and how they fucked up. It's like American families just don't like talking to each other, lol
Edit: I'm regretting this comment so much
I relate to you. I had tried to talk to my sister about my problems when I was really struggling with my mental health, as she was the one I could really trust to understand me. I wrote a whole ass essay about everything, even made sure to write it in a way that she could understand, but she just basically brushed it off with “you’re a teenager now, that’s why you feel this way”. All the things I said weren’t just mindless teenage blabber, they were things describing the intense anxiety and tiredness I felt, which had affected my life so much. I had already struggled with doubting myself because of everyone saying how teenage hormones affect your life, and that did not help. Sorry if I said too much, the memories just flood back after reading your comment. Are you alright now? How are you doing? I hope you’re having a nice day.
"those hormones turned out to be 5 undiagnosed mental disorders" BRO SAME MY COUNSELOR AND I ARE STILL BAFFLED AS TO HOW I MANAGED TO GET PAST HIGH SCHOOL HAHAHAHAH
a lot of the times, the issue in IN FACT hormones. sorry about your 5 undiagnosed metal disorders but that is the exception not the norm.
@@UnicornRoseDust I'm fully aware, that wasn't the point. I was saying young people still need to be held accountable for their actions or they won't learn, and we need to start talking about it more rather than jumping to conclusions. Idk where I implied that every teenager is suffering from mental illness
Oh yes! If only adults listened to the teenagers more... My "hormones" turned out to be a depressive disorder 😁 5 episodes later, I finaly have meds 😂
Worst thing I did as a teenager was not clean my room (to the point where I have a little path to my bed and the rest of my floor is stacked with stuff) and not vacuum when I was asked, never went to parties, never did drugs, didn't drink without my mom there, got good grades, clean the dishes every day, clean the cats litter boxes every day and she still makes me feel like the worst daughter on the planet 😭😂
Same. I’d avoid it until it finally come to spankings, or my dad scooping all my stuff up in a black trash bag and giving it away. I learned, lol.
Tbf, what you did right isn't considered very outstanding. Like, not doing drugs is like, a basic requirement? Getting good grades is for your future and you shouldn't even drink if you're not of legal age. Never going to parties is not something to particularly brag about, taking good care of your pets is a must and cleaning the dishes is a basic household chore. It'll feel good if someone praise you but I don't expect my mother to thank me after I'm done with household chores, I lived in the same house, it's my responsibility too.
@@EmEm-fm4nn yes, thank you, I'm aware I'm nothing special, thanks for the reminder.
All I said was that i was an easy teenager (my mother does agree with this in hindsight) and was still treated like I spent my days dealing drugs and getting wasted.
Also where did you get the idea I drank underaged? Legal drinking age is 16 here. And the cats weren't mine.
God, this is like looking in a mirror
I'm so sorry 💔
I've spent the last 10 minutes watching this video and dieing of laughter. 😂
"can you bring it here , your hormone? " 😂 Man I am rolling on the floor
Well i guess my dad's hormones are keeping him from saying "I love you" or "I'm proud of you" or "thank you for doing what you do in this house without being asked..."
maybe I'm the adult and he's the teenager, silly me 🙃
I have a pdf of the book "Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents" if you're interested, or you could buy the book yourself... I really recommend it
It's ok. Be proud of yourself homie. ❤️ It's your house too!!
@@tuononnovainbici thanks. I want a look at that pdf sometime if you still have it. Or link where to buy.
@@yourmomsaccount69 Yeah we know lol, it's our house too when it needs cleaning
... well damn, that took a turn. Need a hug bro? 🥺
My mom went through menopause when I was a teen; it was both of our hormones
For me it was that, depression for both of us and my OCD tendencies. Yeah, shouting and anger were not often but when it happened it was explosive, mostly on my part.
Lol
I felt that "one time come ajaa" in my bones
She would have had another child & raised it properly had me 😭❤️😂
sounds like "i gOt SpAnKeD AnD I TurNeD OUt OkaY" energy 😬
HIGH-key
FR 😭
@@ohhhhm I'm Indian, and I still agree with this comment a lot 💀
Bro if you a failing comedian you ain't turned out ok
You sound like "I wAS n3VeR diSCiPLiNed aNd tuRneD OuT ToTAlLy OK" energy
If you can't handle teenagers, don't have kids.
Fr man. Tf is with these parents
You'll get it when you have one 😂
@@srikrishnavasanth3895that's such an annoying phrasr lmao my parents didn't have to hit me or my brother and we turned out healthy and successfull academically 🤷🏻♀️
@@srikrishnavasanth3895 yeah my parents had one, they didn't need to hit me just to raise me. Same with all of my cousins. Just say you don't know how to parent. You're simply lazy or don't know how to handle kids and situations.
The only people I've heard say this have the most unhinged, sneakiest kids ever.
Both of my teen boys WERE"easy". So were my Moms 3 teenagers
She is HILARIOUS 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉Too Fun-eee😂😂😂❤❤
I was a really, really angry teenager, because I was dealing with untreated ADHD, depression and trauma. When I wasn't out drinking, or at home angry, I was crying my eyes out. My mom was at her wits end, because there was no disciplining me, I would just leave home and not text back. There was nothing that she could take from me to make me act better, because I didn't care about my things - because I wasn't being a "bad kid" or a "brat", I was hurting, so fucking deeply, and I didn't know how to let my mother help me. It ended with my mom talking to a children's/teens psychologist and getting the advise that she should just let me go, however much it felt wrong and scary, because only then would I come running back, and after a summer of me ruining myself, I did run back, and finally let my mom help me get professional help, and I never pushed my mom away again. I love my mother more than anything in the world, I would kill anyone who hurt her, and her grace and kindness made me into the kind and calm adult I am today.
My point is, if she had ever laid a hand upon me, I would've never returned. That, to me, would be a sign that I was so worthless that not even my own mother would care to see why I was fleeing all the time, why I was so angry and changed from how I used to be. That would've destroyed me. Hitting your child is fucking lazy and bad parenting, and when the day comes where your child is hurting, they know that they can't go to you, because they've been taught that you don't care about their emotions, you only care about them performing to their liking - it might not be the case, but that's what they learn. That shit will forever be a stain on your relationship.
Well I know who isn’t coming to the comedy club with me…
I’m just kidding. I’m glad you were finally were treated for your condition. Take care!
@@misstekhead lmfao oh I was FEELING feeling stuff that day apparently. Still agree with myself, but like also, shut tf up, there's better places to preach about parenting.
@@misstekhead and thank you, that's very sweet!
Hi i have just come across your comment and absolutely agree with you...and hitting the child will only worsen the situation... having said that the world has to understand one thing that there is no bad or good parenting.... it's only that we as adults should know how to respond in different situations...the parent should be able to to identify what the child needs at that particular point of time or in that particular situation....and so parenting is a difficult job in the whole world....so do not generic about the situations thrown at the parents....like not hitting your child is not an option...in the same way leaving the child to come back seeking help is also not an option because there is no ideal situation in life
Well if you didn’t come back, it would have been your loss, not your mother’s. While I do agree that parents need to sit down and talk, they do need to discipline you in any way. We come from a family when my parents don’t resist themselves from hitting and I am glad they did it because not only I turned out well but I do understand the significance of respect and fear. And my parents were the only people who were there I wasn’t focused or was sick. Once I was very sick and my mother bathed me every day and I was 20. My father recently gave me a good thrashing because I was fighting with my husband and I am 33, and it changed my attitude. I am so glad my parents hit when they should have, and sat to have a conversation with me when I needed that. And the same goes for my husband and everyone around. We both are in high paying jobs, never did drugs or any other stupid things. And our parents live with us, and I hope they live for a very long time. Whereas in West, they don’t discipline their child to give them freedom…sometimes the kid turns out okay or not, and when parents get old, the child visits them on holidays in a old age home. AND, OUR PARENTS HAVE BEEN GREAT PARENTS and we owe our life to them. They are still when we need emotional, social and financial support. And I would also hurt anybody who try to hurt them.
Facts the reason why my just found out I have autism at 33 when my mom knew since I was 7 but thought she could cure me by being super strict heavy discipline and overload and knowledge, but bullied to me to no end when I didn’t understand simple things and let others do the same. When my older sister had her second child he was nonverbal and acted just like me sensitive to sound and like touch and other things I just did things that help me he was later diagnosed with autism I wanted to be tested and my mom turned the whole family against me saying I think she a bad mother which is weird but my husband and I got it done for me and the only one who speaks to me is of course my sister. Lol 😂
I'm really sorry they act this way. I hope they gain more understanding over time.
Damn sounds like my mom
So sorry you had that experience from your own mom and family dear
I'm so sorry! This is horrible :(
I wonder if she blames herself for your autism and thats why she was so desperate to "fix" it? I dont have autism but my mom does a lot of things out of Guilt that serve no one but herselr and ends up hurting me/making life harder for me. She did think i had autism but never got me tested because she thought i would outgrow any "odd behavior" one day so who knows (i dont really thknk i will seek diagnosis bc she might have just been insulting me i can never tell what she is trying to say to me)
I’m African, Zulu to be specific and my mother would warn me even before I became a teenager that “there is no such thing as a stage or phase allowed in her house” and funny enough it would never have outbursts
That "Aaja" had me standing straight!
There is a difference between: getting distracted because you're body is changing and there are new things you need to do to take care of it, and blaming laziness on something you can't control. But knowing which one is which takes time.
@BillowsPillow the wize adults are dying out unfortunately... getting replaced by ignorance and misguided individuals... personally I'm a watcher of sorts. Patient and often quiet. But I'd like to believe that has made me wise beyond my years or at least that is what I was told by people long dead by now.
@BillowsPillow the older generations of today didn't learn from the previous generations. Boomers were spoiled brats and chose not to listen gen x had to endure the negligence problems of boomers and tried parenting with strict rules, milenials had to endure the abusive tendencies of gen x and are in the middle of trying to balance good parenting with maintaining an existence and times changing for the worse as poor people get poorer and rich people get richer, gen z it just now getting to the chaos stage and all they see is boomers fighting milenials and gen x pitching in to fuel the flame... the older generations before the boomers had it easy. Not because they had tools to make life easier but because it was possible to be poor and live a good life. Farming doesn't make as much money as it used to because it costs a ton to get into selling crops and if you don't own land you can't live a subsistence lifestyle... and family fortunes run dry if not properly maintained... and when people are poor they justify doing wrong for survival... and that in turn causes people with any amount of stability to live in fear and fear feeds distrust and if you have no trust you lose generosity and when people are no longer generous... the poor get poorer and the rich get richer..
Tell me? What generation is wise enough to put the puzzle together? To see the chaos and disect its roots? Certainly not me. I don't have the kind of reach to make a difference. But if I'm persistent enough maybe I'll touch the right people to make a difference.
exactly, like when I got my period I didn’t tell my mom because I was scared she would think I’m gross, and I was too embarrassed to buy pads so I just used tissues and towels. ofc, it wasn’t enough and I bled through, and because I was taking so much time in the shower worrying, my mom banged on the door to rush me, then at dinner she scolded me about how I was being very impatient and unhappy and how I was behaving badly yadayadayada :< all these small occurrences is why I’m not as comfortable with her as I was before :(
@@yamagoops I hope you figure out a way to mend the issue
My mother used to joke that she would " paint the wall with my blood" if I would this or wouldn't do that. It's extremely agressive and I don't talk to her for several years now. Abusive parents are not good parents.
OMG, I hope you are okay now. It was a good choice to cut her off. You didnt deserve it and she is a monster
Lol, common parent L
This is an example of an abusive patent and I feel horrible for you.
But she didn't and it sounds like you're alive . I used to tell my kids I birthed you and I can bury you too! It's your choice! That's not abusive it's not hitting or anything like that! Like she said it's being raised properly!!
How on Earth can a mother talk like that??? Thank God you're away.
My cousins were visiting us and just staying in the guest room, all day long. When my Mum asked why they're staying in their room, their Mum said that their hormones are bothering them and they don't want to snap at us. What..? 😂
this entire thing is reminding me of a TikTok that goes something along like:
person A: "omg ppl's depression get so bad that they can't brush their teeth?"
person B: "ppl's depression get so bad that they kill themselves Janet"
Depression not always ends with a suicide, most of the time it's just living feeling like we don't deserve to be loved hapinnes, and more other things
@@hanyujia9590 The idea is that depression gets so bad that people kill themselves my dude. The irony is that no shit, people can't do basic functions under a condition that leads plenty to kill themselves.
@@hanyujia9590true, but the comment isn't saying depression only ends in suicide, but that it might lead to suicide , which shows how serious depression can get
@@hanyujia9590Its showing that depression can be very serious lol.
You’re right. It’s not their fault, it’s the parents fault for not teaching them better.
@@xtrmsleep 10/10 recommended if you wanna go to retirement home at age of 60
@@ditto9174
@@xtrmsleep nothing like teaching your child that if soemone does something they aren't supposed to, it's okay to result to physical violence.
It's so realistic I mean-- I accidentally forgot to clock in for my shift for 5 minutes and my boss came out with a belt ready to teach me a real world lesson- oh wait.
We- We don't hit people in the real world just because we don't like what they did.
But that would mean the punishment was instead used for a release of anger for the parent and a way to control the child, in a way that isn't actually used or acceptable in the real world.
I mean, would you spank an adult or an elder with a belt for any misbehavior? Or would you talk to them about said behavior?
Why do we hit children and teenagers and not our spouses and parents and grandparents in this way?
It's only okay when the person you're "teaching a lesson" to, can't exactly do much in retaliation.
I don't think I have to explain how child psychologists have said time and time again, physical punishment is not a good solution. For every "I turned out fine" there's another person who ends up in a cycle of abuse.
I was the latter.
@@ditto9174 bro we indians do love and respect our elders and not go no contact after minor inconveniences, we also dont get thrown to the streets after we turn 18. You guys hardly get disciplined and at most get grounded lol, if you can even call that patenting, taking the least possible way out to realise your punishment. Thats why one small thing in your life doesnt goes your way you guys get into depression anxiety and what not. Your parents made excuses for you even before you started to do it yourself. Pathetic
@@Throwbacky2k highly disagree.. we talk to big people instead of beating them for mistakes because they can understand it... where as kids are stupids and only understand fear.
When I thought something was risky for our kids, my husband's classic line was, " It's ok. We'll make more."
She said hormone in three different languages and they all made sense 👏
Reacting violently towards your child teaches them to react violently towards others.
Not true
I mean if it's abusing than yes
But if it's scolding than it's good
Not true … stopping your child for wrong activity willgive a good futute. Thats why west old people remain lonely until death
@@himashreebasumatari1953 the original commenter is talking about abuse not normal scolding.
And when
@@himashreebasumatari1953 acting in anger, which is in the definition of scolding, is an act of violence.
Violence is never the answer. Teaching right from wrong is the parents responsibility. I have 2 grown children that are very polite, responsible, honest, and loving individuals. They learnt to be this way from my example not from being beaten into submission. I have always treated my children with respect and so they show respect inreturn. 🙏
im glad such parents exist. wish I was your child.
@@dominocoding ❤️🥰
wish i was luckier to not be in a abusive household, i would've loved to be in yours. you're doing humanity a favor ❤️
@Takumi Fujiwara you did not desrve your shitty parents. Fuck them disgusting people
@@hyejusleftlung The amount of people in these comments who think you either have to beat the crap out of your kids regularly or entirely neglect them is insane.
Like there are no other alternatives besides these two.
The end lmfao 😂
I watch her all the time from the U.S. and Spain she’s hilarious
And that's why my parent's generation was so dysfunctional.
"YOU DISOBEY?! YOU GET SLAP!" *Slaps which does not fix said behavior*
They use to work decently. This you don't slap or spank your child thing is stupid. I'm not saying hit them for everything they do or beat them, but here and there certain things could call for a smack across the face or butt.
And look how your generation is coping with the world 😂 everyone doesn’t even know what gender or pronoun to use
@@gemspiritmessages2754 with everyone you mean a loud minority on social media
And whos fault is that btw? Who raised their children so that they seek validation in something so stupid
@@090909092135 my parents used to hit me with a belt or cable. You know how that turned out? I flinch at every sudden move by them. They learned with raising me and are much more calm today and are raising my baby siblings better, but they had to learn. I think a slap or two isn’t bad, but you need to pace it
@@god3485 so u just got hit anytime? Even if u werent behaving badly?
My parents raised me the same. Beat me with a leather belt. I guess I'll never get this humor because I could never do that to someone.
Finally common sense and someone that doesn't praise child abuse as a funny haha normal thing to do cause kids dumb and annoying
You really do not need to spank your kids it is not necessary!! I am so sorry for you. My dad always told me about him being beaten for not going to church... He always said I will never do that to my kid 🙂 he kept his promise.
@@GIsabella1993 my dad used to say "it's God and then it's me" and "if I say the moon is purple, then it's purple" I was also raised religious. I notice this trend of almost being proud of being raised this way. I don't get it... I'm glad you have a loving father 😊
Yeah he is awesome!! I was also raised religious but in a way that I could always choose my path and I still belive in God. I have so many nice memories of going to church 🙂
Exactly! I get it if humour is how you deal with your trauma but that don't mean being an abusive dictator to your kids is how to raise them right
As a teenager raising a teenager, can't agree more
You are hilarious. Thank you for making me laugh at a issue I deal with on a daily basis. ❤
When she said "aww", im feeling the presence of my mom's passive agressive tone before chewing me out oooo😂
Sal I literally felt her moms parental sass thru thru the screen😮
@@chromicapop4595 Right 😭😭😭 their tone is already effective enough to put us in our place like skjsjdhd💀💀
Loool, you thought it was just going to be a verbal sassing. XD The comedians' ultra conservative POC grandma would have DESTROYED HER. XD THE physical beating would have killed her lol.
“WHAT’S 17 MORE YEARS? I CAN ALWAYS START AGAIN. MAKE ANOTHER KID.”
Yeah, the fear of mom's reaction keeps everyone in line.. even the father! :P I was hormonal once, that's it, afterwards my hormones fled in terror of my mom.
The way she pronounced “harmone” 😂
I have had depression since I was like 10, when my parents put me through a very traumatic divorce after a very traumatic childhood and then I had a horrible step mom so I think the fact that sometimes I can’t get out of bed or make my bed or eat sometimes gets a little leeway.
Bruh who said she was talking about you 🥴💀
I'm sorry u went through this but not every joke on the internet is meant to attack you
True 💯
Ya, sometimes "hormones" can mean some intense shit. It means something else is going on. I see where the comedian is coming from, but I dont agree with her.
Sorry you had to go through that. I'm glad you had an understanding parent around.
It's really sad that people act proud about how their parents were abusive. There's a happy medium between being completely permissive and completely authoritarian.
Yeah, that's one of the weirdest and worst things to me in comedy. Ever since I was a child, like "Why is it funny that their parents weren't understanding or supportive....?"
Then again, as a child I called social services on the parents of several friends who were spanked. Confronted the parents directly when I had the chance and asked earnestly if they didn't know that's completely illegal here. If you're too underdeveloped as an adult to reason with children, and think violence is the right option, you should not be raising children.
Aaand yes, of 3, 2 families obviously never wanted me in their home again.
How on earth is this abusive? It's about discipline. And we are proud because what we are today, is thanks to the way our parents disciplined us and made us a good human being. We never felt that as an abuse
@@navneethkrishnan3412 I hope you know that the very reason you don't see how fucked up this is is because of the generational trauma that normalises it and is the reason why this chain has to be broken , hitting your children is never the option and sadly it is very normalised in india
@@navneethkrishnan3412 beating your child and making them have long life trauma is not discipline, would you hit a coworker because they didn't do their job? Would you hit your mom because she didn't pack your lunch? Beating someone in real life is assault, so why should it be okay to beat up children when they are doing things because they are children and their brains are fully developed? Hitting your children will not make them love you, just because you thought it was okay doesn't.mean your children will, you'll end up stuck on a horrible retirement home without the love of your children
@@elliot__agares
Aren't retirement homes a western concept?
Whenever my mom got mad at me for literally anything she would just chalk it up to me being a brat or me not “loving her” or smth. (She’s kind of a narcissist and she’ll always claim that my brother and i don’t love her or think she’s a terrible mom) But then the minute I turned 13 all of a sudden I’m doing it because I’m a teenager now and I “want to rebel”. Like no Jessica. It’s because your rules are stupid. Me being 13 is just a coincidence. 😂
Girl that’s is WAY too accurate! She sounds just like my mother
"if i acted like a normal teenager when i was a kid my mom would've beaten me to death" is not the flex people think it is
it isnt a flex she is complaining about uneducated parents in uneducated countries
yass queen continue the cycle of abuse!
Its not a flex its a fact 😭
As a teenager I can text my mom back and I can make my bed. People are just so soft nowadays istg. It's not hard to just listen to your parents
She is rightly criticising the behaviour that sadly you consider to be "normal". Being selfish and lazy is *not normal behaviour.* So, flex right on queen.
Love how she tells us exactly where her generational trauma comes from and that she’s continuing it flawlessly in one breath 😂 “my mom would have beat me for me asking for respect for my growing brain, so now I’ll continue that toxic shit to my kids cause I am my Mother” ✨
Slaayy
fr
💯💯, self-awarness not included
Yah… and when kids grow up, they don’t know how to take care of themselves because they didn’t want to learn sh*t when they were younger. Making your bed is basic and having you doing it is not abusing, it’s teaching you to take care of yourself and immediate environment. Stop calling every little thing abuse.
She is a comedian and made a joke about HER childhood and how SHE was raised right or wrong furthermore she didn't say she would do the same. She did say teenagers are difficult...where is the lie? I had a good laugh 😆
I love how she went from hormone to harmone while mimicking her mother. 😂 Excellent
whenever you hear a parent justify this kinda parenting you always hear "If i did x to MY parent"
it's projection and perpetuation. pulling a bed cover is not worth scolding your kid for
I hate any jokes about physical discipline, being disrespectful to your kids boundaries, or just treating them less than human because of stuff like them not cleaning their room. I went from a happy outgoing kid to now an adult at 25 with anxiety, depression, and complex ptsd from family trauma. Professionally diagnosed. Because of behavior like this from my parents.This is something I will have to carry with me my whole life. So please never think this is okay it can really change a person's life for the worse.
“Being disrespectful to your kids’ boundaries” can mean a lot of different things. Kids aren’t really in a position to set their own boundaries, generally speaking. I’m certainly not advocating beating the hell out of your kids or anything close to it, but I think that many parents allow their kids to set too many of their own “boundaries”, rather than setting healthy boundaries for them. Of course the relationship between parents and kids often involves varying amounts of negotiation, but kids really do need stability and structure to be imposed upon them, with boundaries enforced by the parents. That is what allows kids to develop discipline and even maintain emotional stability and the ability to self-regulate. Without a significant amount of “tough love”, kids actually become more anxious, and the negative consequences of this lack absolutely Carrie’s over into adulthood.
@@jessebarnes1963 I was gonna reply to that person but you said what I was thinking muchhhhh better
I completely understand what you mean. There should not be physical discipline like that but she is talking about them looking for excuses to not do their duty in their house like folding their blankets. Ofcourse she can take their computer time away as competition or not let them have ice cream for a month. I have never been treated with physical discipline because my parents were smart enough to realise you can make your kids love you if you are scary and mean.
Sometimes physical is necessary. It doesn’t make the parents feel good, but they’re doing it for their child’s benefit. Not that abuse is okay, but goodness gracious, a spanking now and then after multiple chances to fix their mistake will not scar a child for life
Yeah today's generation proves they needed to be disciplined, we don't judge someone's culture and we don't tell someone how to parent. Until a kid is SA'ed, beaten to a pulp, left neglected etc. Being simply disciplined in MY opinion is highly needed for stressful teens, but it still starts with the parent.
People be like: "when I misbehaved my parents BEAT me 🤣🤣🤣😅🤣😅😂😂🤣😂🤣"
Like honey, are you okay? 😟
Kind of,I kind of laugh and joke about it sometimes,but with videos like "I got beaten with a frying pan and if it wasn't because I survived,I wouldn't be here 😂😂😂" I don't laugh anymore
I am the people that don't embrace that type of "discipline" and if I was a mother,I would never do that to my children
nah bruh, cycles are repeated by people who refuse to see the humanity in children
I love her sence of humor❤
😂😂😂 It's so dark and so AMAZING!
My upbringing didn't make my teenage years easier/bearable. Imagine being so confused and suddenly very self-conscious and aware of everything..and you get yelled at and shamed for every little thing you do. It's the reason I don't want children
Edit: ps: I was a very well-behaved kid. A sharp edge with decent grades. But I always had to be compared to everything that moves
Bro, I feel you. There's nothing more I could do to do better for my parents. 4.7 GPA, does chores, takes care of pets/siblings, doesn't party or make mistakes, yet they constantly nitpick and demand more and more control
@@person3271 I'm really sorry you had to go through this. My best advice is to never measure your own self-worth by others' words (Yes, even parents. Especially parents)
I hope you get to have your dream life from here on.
same as never partying not going out with friends not going to the cinema take care of my siblings as the oldest but my mother would still have complaints 24/7 (and at least in this life I will never have kids)
I had a big problem with moodswings when I was a teenager. Sometimes something as unimportant as not instantly finding my keys made me cry. It wasn't an excuse, but an explanation. I knew that the emotions I was feeling were unreasonable, and could tell my mom that I felt those emotions and I would have to deal with them before we could continue our discussion. I still had to face the consequences of my actions.
At the end of the day, they're just asking u to control yourself even when you're feeling bad, because In adulthood if u give reasons like "I'm gonna be cruel to someone today,it's my hormones" u still face the consequences to that... regardless of how sad or mad u are...that's life... they're training u to behave and discipline yourself actually...they don't "hate u"... that's unless they say stuff like "I want u to get married t whoever WE CHOOSE ONLY" then that's a different situation
@@_SynowMinnow_7997 pretty sure the point is that teenagers are different from adults... Adults don't have hormones going wild so that point doesn't really work, unless you're pregnant in which case that would be a valid explanation. Nobody is using it as an excuse for bad behavior like this video claims
I was hitting the menopause when my son hit puberty. We were both quite hormonal but, as I told him, my hormones had seniority. We coped, lol.
For me it was depression, trauma, and an overwhelming belief that I wouldn't be able to convince myself not to throw myself into a car when I was a teenager
To be fair, when people talk about teenagers hormones, it’s usually not in a nice understanding way 😂
Yeah my brother and I (western parents) got hit too, also when we were teens. Nice to have the freedom to go no contact as soon as your stand on your own.
This 👆
I hope you're living your best life. I'm proud of you for doing what's best for yourself, distancing yourself from a parent can be really difficult, even when they're a nasty piece of work.
@@sashatasha9725 why are you trolling when the topic is literally abuse?
Dang you must be a terrible person if you abandon your family because you got disciplined
100% this. and i'm an Italian/German/Pole. And I raised my daughter the same way.
That: “One time come”🤣🤣🤣🤣
My Western parents were like, "We need to prepare you for adulthood," which is how most parents actually operate.
"I was abused as a child, so I shall traumatise my kids now, because I see nothing wrong with that"
She never said she would do that to her kids...
There's need to be basic discipline that's need to be followed abusing doesn't comes under it
It’s not called traumatizing, it’s called discipline. And that should be done gently so they don’t turn out hard headed in the future
To all 3 of you.
"And I would not be standing here today" sounds more she would get beat up instead of actually getting disciplined. Stop trying to make it look like something it's not, just because your parents were raising hands on you doesn't mean it's normal. That's not how you discipline a child. Go seek help.
@@Th3Voic3s_ what the hell I never said beating a child was alright! I just said she never claimed she would beat HER children, so you should change your comment.
Idk what Westerns you've been talking to but everyone I talked to as a teenager loved to remind me I'm a stupid teenager, even if i was doing nothing wrong.
She says that like it's a good thing
It's not just hormones. Adults tell us to act like adults and then they treat us like kids. 😐
I've worked with teenagers. Tried treating them like adults and they failed miserably.
@@ira_stay26ofc somebody tells you treating teenagers like adults doesn’t work so you make up an excuse
@@ira_stay26 yeah teenagers aren’t adults so don’t treat them like adults because they will fail miserably
@@ira_stay26 I’m a teenager and no we aren’t kids we are teenagers we should still be treated as less then adults but we need to prepare for adulthood so it can be pretty annoying but we need to act like adults
@@LoonyHalfBlood Because teenagers aren't adults. You don't treat them like babies, you dont treat them like adults, you treat them like TEENAGERS
I’ve heard folks talking about “when I was young…” is this your way to talk about your childhood trauma? Did parents raise people who never got a chance to live but rather were traumatized as a kid?
Calm down buddy...it's a comedy routine. You should go out more often and ask your parents to hug you more.
Not everything is trauma. They’re just relating it to their experience growing up.
@@honestreflections5541 the word trauma just means something deeply distressing. It has a broad number of uses. Being whipped/spanked/beaten definitely falls under the category of trauma. Me and my brother were raised using very different methods. Seeing him run in fear from a belt, screaming and crying in PAIN after being hit with it. Yeah. That’s traumatic. It’s just so normalised so people think it’s okay. If a child is old enough to understand the concept of fear, and old enough to have the freedom to make decisions with detrimental effects, they’re old enough for constructive conversation. It’s not even biologically or psychologically effective (which it isn’t, its just conditioning using a pain stimuli. What do you do when you feel pain? Knee jerk reaction, you pull away from it. You’re teaching your child to pull away from you because YOU are the cause of their pain - seen this first hand when my brother binged alcoholic because he was beat for underage drinking. Being in his own home, away from the pain stimuli, he could indulge in drinking. He’s better now but that’s besides the point, it required constructive conditioning to teach him that it was a negative thing, because it didn’t occur in his brain that it was negative, when he thought of a negative stimuli, it was always the belt or the spanking or the yelling, etc).
@@KaiWills My point was everything isn’t traumatic and that that word is very overused. Overusing the word trauma desensitizes people to what real trauma is
@@honestreflections5541 it really isn’t that big of a deal. Trauma is a massive umbrella term for a lot of things, and used in a variety of context (see: blunt force trauma compared to minor psychological trauma) If you don’t want desensitisation, it’s simple, use the actual medical terminology for a specific trauma. It’s like anxiety. Anxiety itself is just an emotion, anxiety disorder is another thing in its entirety.
couldn't agree more. this is fantastic.
Theyre just entittled brats! When my son just threw his stuff around that l washed and ironed l got so mad eventually that I took the lot and when he was rushing to go out and said, hey mum Where's my socks clean shirt and trousers. I offered each item at a price 🫴 He was well annoyed but coughed up eventually and put his stuff away carefully after that.😂😂
I was a strict parent but we were fair. Everyone has an equal voice. Their concerns, explanations, what happened was always given a chance. If when dealing with a problem someone got upset or angry. We took 30min breaks, because nothing gets accomplished with everyone upset and emotional. Thankfully my kids are grown, and we have great relationships with both of them and we talk e
Commendable. As an adult I've learned to do something similar: if I'm clearly emotional ill write down my thoughts and. come back to it when I've settled down and have a rational mind again. I can only imagine how much less damaged I'd be if my parents had the emotional intelligence to do anything similar.
Yes my parents needed parenting classes. My motto raising my kids was: think about what my parents would do, and then do the opposite. It worked well for me. Not addressing a problem until you’ve calmed down is great. But when you aren’t able to take a beat, don’t be afraid to apologize to your kids. If I lost it because let's face it we all do. I would tell my kids I know I flip out sometimes but I will always apologize and try to handle it better next time.
This is wholesome and I love to take notes when I read things like this. Not to become a parent, just ro become a good person.
She's probably a great person but I'm really done with asian parenting culture saying treating kids with respect is a joke. (I'm asian myself)
I get emotionally abused on the daily and I really am done with how normalised it is for me and my friends parents.
My heart aches hearing this, if I could help ...I would. Sending you a supportive hug from the UK. I'm proud of you x
I’ve seen many CZcams shorts joking about strict Asian parents and my boyfriend does as well. While they are funny, when you remember the parents are *actually* like this it’s really sad.
I am Indian and it's really not funny when you go through that.
I am so sorry for you. I am actually so done with these stereotypes. Like kids also deserve respect and I am a person who always thinks teaching your kids discipline through violence will just ruin them mentally (and that's a fact by a psychology student) if you notice or not and that's trauma.
So in short, parents should respect kids no matter the race of the parent.
I've had to deal with friends sobbing and wainting to off themselves because they got emotionally and physically abused as a way of "discipline"
We so need her on a world tour ! ❤😂❤😂❤
Can't stop my laugh since i haven't started yet..
That's called bad parenting, not "the only way to do it" lmao
Don't forget that when your kid grows up they get to decide whether they want a relationship with you or not. If you treat your kid like shit they're not gonna want to be around you.
Edit: godamn did people willfully misunderstand this comment. I'm talking about physical, verbal, and mental abuse. It's my fault for not clarifying that but I'd hoped that people would be smart enough to pick up on it. Also want to address the people who are saying the kid is the problem and in some rare cases you might be right but, let's not forget who raised that kid.
Soooopooooooooo true
I find it funny that she said Indian children don't have hormones.
This means they're not animals, so eating Indians is vegan.
@@Nerobyrne no dim***
She said Western teens are being enabled. Duh
Well reverse is true too. Your parents won't want to be in touch if teens treat them like shit too.
@@drkrishnap no she said they have hormones. Which just means they're animals
in the us people blame teenager attitude on hormones (instead of the fact that they’re simply beginning to realize how sh*tty they’re treated) but they still hate teenagers for not acting the way they want them to. it’s not like a sympathy thing tbh it’s the opposite, it’s to invalidate their thoughts and opinions
THIS SO MUCH frrrr
Sort of like asking a woman who's annoyed with you if she's on her period?
@@potatoeoverlord9430 yup, exactly like that
I think the issue is “You’re too young and dumb to know anything” then “Why don’t you act mature?”
Teens rebel, but it seems mainly against parents. A great opportunity for other adults to say things in a less emotionally charged way (and without the ability to punish over the teen simply disagreeing), and to encourage good lessons/living, but a lot of older people just sh*t on teens.
I listened to my grandmother, my aunts, and even one of my friend’s mom over my own mom.
@@josephinenelan4204 exactly! my biggest issue when i was in my teen years was that my parents (and many other adults) simply refuse to listen to children at all and treat them like pets instead of people. i was a very well behaved child but i absolutely hated my parents and ***never*** told them anything about my personal life (i still don’t) meanwhile i had so so much respect for and was open with other adults in my life because they understood respect is not something you earn through age
I tell my son now that he's 14 that he can expect his hormones to make him angry and want to be aggressive and lash out. But I told him he's smarter than that and he needs to control himself because he's not four, he's heading into adulthood. Also this is a respectful house, it goes both ways. If you want me to respect you, you're going to respect me. So far so good, he's an absolute angel. Every now and then he can get a little short, but you give him the mom eyeball, and then he apologizes and everything is good again. I'm so glad he's not like me. I was in jail when I was his age.