Bipolar Disorder GUILT - (Quick Tip)
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- čas přidán 14. 06. 2024
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⚠️ BIPOLAR DISORDER GUILT: Something I struggle with is guilt from my past actions or behavior when I wasn't well. I've said and done many things that I wish I could take back. When I'm depressed, I start dwelling on all these things I regret. It puts me into a downward spiral where the depression gets even worse. I'm sure many of you can relate.
▶️ In this video from Polar Warriors, I'm going to share a simple tip that can help you soften how hard you are on yourself. If you struggle with Bipolar Disorder guilt, I hope this video provides you with some peace - and a new tool for your "Bipolar toolbox."
👉A FEW CAUSES OF BIPOLAR GUILT:
❗️ Behavior during manic or hypomanic episodes: People in a manic or hypomanic state may engage in risky or impulsive behaviors that they later regret. This can lead to feelings of guilt and shame, especially if the behaviors caused harm to themselves or others.
❗️ The impact of the illness on others: Bipolar disorder can be a strain on relationships. People with bipolar disorder may feel guilty about the burden they place on their loved ones.
❗️ Difficulties managing the illness: Living with a chronic mental illness can be challenging. People with bipolar disorder may feel guilty if they have trouble sticking to their treatment plan or if their illness interferes with their work or social life.
👉A FEW SIGNS OF BIPOLAR DISORDER GUILT:
❗️ Excessive rumination on past mistakes
❗️ Feeling worthless or like a burden to others
❗️ Withdrawing from social activities
❗️ Difficulty forgiving oneself
❗️ Increased anxiety or depression
👋 I personally live with TYPE 1 #bipolar disorder - with rapid cycling, and psychotic features. My videos aren't just for the millions of "Polar Warriors" out there who live with #bipolardisorder... They are also for the families, spouses, children, friends, and anyone else trying to understand more about the illness. Through the support, encouragement, education, and tools found in these videos, I hope you find yourself on a better path to mental wellness.
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-Rob
Now I feel "humble," not ashamed. Humility is a virtue, shame is just self-punitive.
Shame is a daily/nightly battle.
“We only ever realize that we did something less than ideal once we’ve grown past it.” I had to write this down so that this can be my mantra whenever I am riddled with guilt. Thank you so much, Rob! Watching your videos makes me feel that I am not alone. Stay awesome!
Guilt is something I can't stop feeling
I get it. I have problems getting the guilt cloud away from me. I do apologize to my family for my forked tongue, and I do this every time! I do it to let them know I know what I said, and I am sorry, because that is not me and they know it. I do try and I mean try to not be a hag in my modes, but yeah. It doesn't work most of the time. We just have to do our best and that is all people can ask of us. Take care and I hope you find a system that helps the guilt to lessen or just go away.
I have just gone through the most awful hyper manic episode. I got hyper, drank too much & verbally attacked an extremely close male friend and ended up storming off, falling over & woke up in a farmer’s field.
My sis who witnessed the verbal onslaught later remarked that if I’d been a man, he would have decked me & told me to FO.
He obviously was quite shaken by my verbal attack & has forgiven me but deep down, I don’t think our friendship will ever be the same again & tbh, I deserve it.
I was completely out of control & now for the guilt & the crash…….
No one talks about guilt, so thanks for touching on it. Looking back to see my progress today really helps, and I'm really gentle to myself, it's a necessity...
It’s easy to forgive others. Forgiving yourself is hardest. However, life is much easier once you are able. My experience anyway.
Guilt is still a breakthrough symptom sometimes, but I notice it only happens when I'm not feeling well or have acute anxiety. Sleep is a lot. It really is.
I can never stop the embarrassing and weird things I've done from the past. I can not forgive myself, and im ashamed.
I have been Bipolar 1 since 2010. I have a MSN in Nursing. I guess it’s being grateful to still be able to work. I can not take the stress at work and I know I can come across as odd. It is tiring at times, I’m doing the best I can
This sounds horrible to say but there’s something kind of comforting about this video. My husband has been mostly hypo for almost a year now and just recently went full manic & ended up in the hospital then the psych ward for a few days after drug seeking behaviour put him over the edge. The anger, hostility and abuse I’ve had to endure while trying to keep him from ending up where he did is just awful. He’s home now but I can’t really talk to him about any of it or get any closure or a real apology without blame directed at me. We’ve been here before… it’s not until he’s in depression that he can truly reflect on the damage and trauma his behaviour has inflicted on me. So as heartbreaking as it is to see him in depression, this video reminds me that he actually does have the ability to see what he’s done and it strangely makes me feel less alone and more seen.
Hey love your videos! Would love a video on money management tips for bi polar people. I feel like I’m constantly out of money, or that my money is drained so quickly. I have a hard time saving or putting money aside, or even prioritizing what I need to pay for. Sometimes I go overboard on buying things or I have so many payments or responsibilities that it takes away most of what I have.
Sometimes you just need that little nudge to remind yourself that your mistakes do not define you. Thank you, Rob!
Also, what assuages my guilt is to share it with my doctor and the person I feel it toward. Usually, I'm wrong about how "bad" I should feel. Maybe it's leftovers from childhood shame.
Perfect timing! When I am not feeling great, I get intrusive thoughts about all my past failings. I’m experiencing this now. I will try some good self-talk today instead. You’re always helpful Rob! Thank you!
Hearing ppl say “I knew you were crazy” stayed on a loop in my mind for a long time. Having to take medication to feel “normal” makes ppl feel ashamed.
It's tough when others judge us for seeking help. Remember, taking care of your mental health is important.
-Rob
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
@@PolarWarriors Thank you for sharing 🙏🏽
Great video - this was really validating. Guilt hits me in a big way, especially if I’ve hurt someone I love. I figure all I can do is apologize and take responsibility. I let them vent at me if necessary - anything to make it right again. Lately I’ve been telling myself that realizing I’ve messed up and wanting to make it right proves I’m not inherently evil.
Thanks for allowing those closest to you to vent if necessary. It’s not to make you feel bad or drudge up the past but more to feel heard and seen for how the behaviour affects us too. As your main support system and the people who love you most, often times we just need an apology and some understanding after an episode has passed that we struggle too. It honestly goes a long way in healing 🙏🏽
That's a really beautiful and pragmatic look on the feeling of guilt. However this just made me realise that I'm often repeating the same mistakes as I did in the past when I go through episodes which makes me feel awful as a person like I'm incapable of growth or change even though I want to be.
I found what works for me is reaching out to people I may have hurt with my words or actions and through either forgiveness or not I can find peace in that they are willing to forgive me for an action or I can find peace in that them not wanting to be around me means I am at no risk of hurting them further. Maybe it's not a perfect mindset but it helps me cope.
This was a much needed reminder today, thank you!
Thank you, Rob. This is a really great message for all of us, and especially carers, not just those struggling with bipolar. I will be pinning up those words as a daily reminder.
An alternative perspective coming from the spouse of someone who has bipolar - it sure is nice being apologized to for the awful and mean things said and done to me when manic. Sadly, it often takes depression to reach that point but just to say, recognition and an apology go a long way in helping heal past trauma.
They grow into it. Yes. Thank you. This is timely. I’ve done things less ideal in the past. Then guilt. Remorse. Anxiety. Now I know how to let go. Thank you Robert.
Since i was diagnosed with bipolar last month at age 30 I have been really glad to find a channel like this to help me navigate this chapter of my life. Thank you for all you do and blessings be upon you 😀
Guilt/regret is a daily struggle for me. Thanks for this Rob. ❤️
Many years ago, when I was riddled with guilt from actions during a manic episode, and my psychiatrist used an analogy that I continue to refer to. Our life coping with bipolar disorder is a journey without a destination, so we have to look at our progress like a horizontal line graph. The nature of our illness causes literal ups and downs, and at times, we cannot completely manage this even when implementing the best strategies, going to therapy, and taking our meds. However, despite this, if over a span of time (whether weeks, months, or years) the trajectory of the graph line is moving in an upward diagonal direction from left to right, then we deserve to applaud all the hard work we've done on ourselves to improve our mental health. As difficult as living day to day can be with our illness, we can take pride in knowing that each day adds up to form a bigger picture of the narrative that is our journey to wellness.
here's what i do to stop feeling shame - i know that i do my best at all times - at that time that was best to my knowledge. second - if i did anything bad to someone during a manic ep. then i apologize afterwards saying that im sorry i did that and i also tell them that and that time i was sick, was pretty much out of my control.
Thank You for sharing because even short videos helps🎥 I’m bi polar and I am the hardest on myself.
Hi Michael,, I programmed Polar Warriors in my phone 📱 so I can always carry this information with me at Home or when I'm walking around somewhere needing some relief and help when I'm happy or sad 😢 Thank You for your help..
So great and so helpful that you did this Guilt management video Rob. I have used this tool too and it is the only way forward I think, to not only refrain from less than ideal behavior and thoughts, but to affirmatively act differently. For example, I feel guilty about not writing "thinking of you" notes to my sister when she was dying of cancer and I knew she wanted notes. Or I have intentions of sending such things for people but somehow never put pen to paper. Now I don't wait. I make sure I am there for people especially those that are alone, really elderly or coping with illness. Or all three.
Wow. Thank you. I really needed to hear this now. About 5 weeks ago I really blew up at an old friend. I feel that my reasons were actually reasonable for my sense of frustration and hurt over several years. But when I tried to address it, I went into an angry rage-fest stoked by these feelings dwelling in me for years. But the behaviors did not deserve my way of blowing up at him. It took me a couple of weeks to realize it had happened that way.
... Yeah. I feel tremendously guilty, full of regret and our long friendship may be over now.
But your advice here does help. Thanks.
A bipolar daighter in law has brought hell to our family. Destroyed my son, his children, my relationship with my grandchildren, and alienated our entire family. There is no remorse on her part. I only hope the same hell she has brought to our lives she will feel the same. God help her! She reminds me of the demons of darkness and their scheming.
You can’t do anything about the past , apart from saying sorry , most people that know you will understand and forgive and forget
i have the most wonderful and caring family. when i am down it is really hard sometimes to not look back, and think about how i yelled and screamed the most insane things in their faces for no reason.
It's wonderful that you have such a supportive family, and it's commendable that you reflect on your actions. Gratitude goes a long way.
-Rob
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Thank you for posting this meaningful video.
Neuroscience of Sam Harris has help me A LOT. Read "Free Will" by him in 2013.
It gave me the mental tools to forgive myself and my parents (and everybody else for that matter).
It's like what the character of m
Master Oogway said in Kung Fu Panda - "yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present." Whoever added that to the script gets it.
I find it hard to forgive the things I did before diagnosis. The intense shame and guilt for the hurt I caused haunts me. Nothing can erase the harm I caused so why should I not suffer for the ongoing pain I inflicted.
Excellent point. AFTER I feel guilty, I try to soften. Only after using self compassion can I think how might have reacted more calmly, maturely; recognizing I have choices in reacting only comes when I am patient and curious with myself. I look to peeps I admire and observe their diplomacy. This process is subtle but worth noting...and not easy, to say the least, lol. AH! I appreciate your channel!
So cool to see your process unfold and how you handle guilt. Keep exploring those choices and stay curious about yourself. Your support means the world, thank you!
It would be great to stay connected with you... I'll include a link below to my private community on Patreon. It's where you can message me directly anytime (and access a lot of content I don't post on CZcams).
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Take extra good care of yourself @Dana-op6ex and I hope you will continue to stop by the channel.
I appreciate you =)
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
This was extremely helpful. I will remember your words.
I take lessons from my maternal grandmother and understand that everyone makes mistakes or does something wrong, guilt will not correct it remember how you and others felt after and look to not repeat it
I know I am toxic, I was told. I am consciously removing myself from all my connections one by one so I won't be toxic to anyone anymore and no one will rely on me so my eventual unaliving will have no victims. 😊
When I spend money I feel guilty for having it to spend. My head starts to feel up with to many things I start talking to myself for it to stop. It works most of the time.
Reading Marcel Proust's "In Search of Lost Time" has really helped me understand and identify with the phenomenon of involuntary memory
Thank you. I shall remember this!
I have guilt and shame for things I barely remember I did. I have a lot of black holes in my memory. I Know I was neglectful sometimes of my son growing up being in bed with depression not able to function.
Hey don't beat yourself up.. all you can do is work with what you have..but its important to acknowledge to your son that you are aware that it must have been hard for him. That it's was not intentional and say sorry about how it felt for him ..
This is such a short yet very impactful video
Thank you for all your hard work
Love this. Really hits home, your advice has actually helped me day to day with guilt
Thank you for your kind words, knowing I've made a positive impact means a lot :)
-Rob
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Thank you brother!!
I used to say sorry a lot. Now I either don't know I did something, I don't remember I did something, and sometimes I just don't care. I'm usually a very nice person so if I do something I'm not happy about I don't care because I was pushed into doing it. Being raised as a preacher's kid you learn masking from the time of preschool. I have only been diagnosed as bipolar and ADHD 4 years ago. I do realize I have come along way.
Exactly what I needed to hear today!
I'm glad this resonated with you!
-Rob
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
thank you for you
I did and thank you so much it’s a real problem
Helpful thank you
My guilt is based more on being unreliable and/or a burden to those I care about.
Your videos advice and tips are appreciated and helpful. I question do you have anything to help with coming down from being manic but suddenly wanting to feel manic cause you get so much done and feel energized and you basically continue to struggle to stay normal cause you continue doing things that are actually causing your mania. Such as myself with ice coffee the caffeine gets me so hi slash manic when you are so use to functioning I'm hi mania it makes it so hard to come down and stay down even tho you find yourself really appreciating the down at times it feels good to slow down and not spin out but I feel like I'm not functioning hi enough. I don't know if this even makes any sense but this is my current struggle. Please help 🙏. And no apparently i don't care who reads this it is what it is maybe there's someone else feeling the same way and maybe this could help them also. I can't be alone. Can I?
What I don’t understand is when someone commit suicide and it comes out that he or she was manic, depressant, bipolar. What I don’t understand is this person was very loved he had great sense of humour everyone loved him he seemed to have it all he really was the whole package I can’t wrap my brain around it. He won awards he lived in the public eye. Never heard anything negative only positive about him. Please help me understand what he was going through.
I once was at a black tie event that had a silent auction. I ended up winning a signed hockey stick and lower bowl tickets to a game for me and 3 others. During the post gala portion of the evening, it came time for dancing. While we were dancing and having a good time, I decided it would be a good idea to go around and smack people with my hockey stick. It wasn't a violent "smack", but it was something unwanted and I'm sure made people uncomfortable and irritated. I did that the entire time I was on the dance floor. The next day I realized what I had done and was seriously embarrassed. I was so distraught. I wished I could apologize to everyone who was there. But the only person I could reach out to was my friend who was the founder of the non-profit. I asked her for forgiveness and told her I didn't know what I was doing. She of course said it wasn't a big deal. But it was to me and was really embarrassing and humiliating. All this to say is, I have a really tough time feeling guilty after I have done something like this to my friends. It's something I am working on. I am stable right now, so being this out of control is not a problem at the moment, but feeling guilty is definitely a growth process and one that I continue to struggle with. Sorry for such a long story, but I thought it may be relevant to this subject. Thanks.
I appreciate you opening up and being vulnerable. It takes courage to share experiences like this. We all have those embarrassing moments, but it's cool that you're working on it. Keep up the good vibes!
It would be great to stay connected with you... I'll include a link below to my private community on Patreon. It's where you can message me directly anytime (and access a lot of content I don't post on CZcams).
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Take extra good care of yourself @geoflevine and I hope you will continue to stop by the channel.
I appreciate you =)
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
Thanks!
WOW! Hi Chris!! You are literally the first person on my channel to post a Super-Thanks! I can't thank you enough for supporting my advocacy work like that! Super cool =) =). If you'd like to connect personally by phone, text, or DM's, I'll include a link below to my Patreon community. Hope to see you there.
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
-Rob
love this one
Your support means the world to me, thank you!
-Rob
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Thanks
Amén.
You need to take responsibility for what you have done this didn't happen for me I wanted to hide away I probably was considered selfish for my shame and embarrassment judgement from other people I wasn't well when I caused so much upset to others I'm rumernating all the time now about passing events I guess distractions help a lot with me it's when I'm less busy those past thoughts come rushing back
I was diagnosed with bipolar and I cry all the time and I feel guilty over the least little thing I’m paranoid feeling like people are mad at me when they aren’t really that they always forgive when needed and I worry that if I make the least little mistake then everybody what’s to just walk out on me and not even give me another look I have one person that has been with me for 10 years she is a much needed staff person that comes to take care of me
Thank you for sharing your story. Having someone by your side for 10 years is truly a blessing. Remember, mistakes are just proof that you're trying. Keep your head up!
Take extra good care of yourself and I hope you will continue to stop by the channel.
I appreciate you =)
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Ty
Aye aye captain 👨🏻✈️ 1:57
Hi @Ghosted676! Thanks so much for taking the time to comment. I know this illness can be incredibly hard to navigate. I'd love to offer any support I can... If it interests you, I have a private community where you can message me directly and network with other people who are going through similar struggles. No pressure of course, but it would be great to have you join us. I'll include a link below:
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Take extra good care of yourself and I hope you will continue to stop by the channel.
I appreciate you =)
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
How do I handle the Guilt when it seems I’m making the same ol mistakes, just in different ways?? It makes me feel like a crash is coming & AGAIN I can’t stop it. . It’s scares me!! 😢
What is the difference between guilt and shame? I have almost no shame and an abnormal amount of guilt, but I don't know what differentiates the two despite being to identify them clearly. :/
Not sure if any of my suggestions are advised or not, I have family and friends as support. Only a couple are trying to understand what I am going threw and guiding threw even my hard times. The hardest thing I have to face is in this state mental health help is horrible and if everyone understands mental health is frown upon like disease. When instead and I have said this many time to family and friends that people with mental doesn't have to be look at as that, With bipolar there has been many successful people and made life grand and best of all great inventions. Like I said I have a lot of guilt but mine again I don't think would be very helpful like as yours is thnx
if you cant say sorry you wont ever be happy
Yep. Thats me everytime. Especially when i get intoxicated. I feel so horrible o don't know why God created me or since He did, why does He tolerate me???
Living with an adult family member diagnosed with bipolar. I struggle calling him out when he is being less then kind or understanding. Because I know he is very hard on himself when he realizes I don't appreciate his behavior. Do I confront these situations or do I just ignore them. Because I don't want to contribute to his depression.
Hi @susansheehan431! Thanks for joining the conversation in the comments. I'm very accessible and happy to answer any questions you have...
Below is a link to my private community on Patreon. It's where you can message me directly and I'll get back to you right away. We can also arrange a phone call if that would be more helpful.
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
I appreciate you =)
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
❤
I have a question. Have you ever talked about or have knowledge related to marijuana as a medication in conjunction with more traditional medication?
Hi @bluepiggaming204! Thanks for joining the conversation in the comments. I'm very accessible and happy to answer any questions you have...
Below is a link to my private community on Patreon. It's where you can message me directly and I'll get back to you right away. We can also arrange a phone call if that would be more helpful.
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Take extra good care of yourself @bluepiggaming204 and I hope you will continue to stop by the channel.
I appreciate you =)
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
To polar warriors. How did you lose weight? I have bipolar 1 and im on abilify. Any help from anyone is appreciated. God bless
Hi @Vincent-yp1gj! Thanks for joining the conversation in the comments. I'm very accessible and happy to answer any questions you have...
Below is a link to my private community on Patreon. It's where you can message me directly and I'll get back to you right away. We can also arrange a phone call if that would be more helpful.
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Take extra good care of yourself @Vincent-yp1gj and I hope you will continue to stop by the channel.
I appreciate you =)
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
1st!
Thank you so much for that! You’re awesome Darron!
Thanks for your post. Helpful.
Your awesome! But my challenge is, I know what is positive and what is negative. The thing is my family doesn't try to help one bit at all. Infact they purposely do things they know are going to distroy my heart and well being. I tell them how much what ever the situation is, going to affect me. X 1000. The next issue that arrises they do the exact opposite of what I have shown them in your awesome videos talking about what not to do? I showed my dad the video about how horrible we end up feeling after an avoidable hurtful situation. First thing you made aware to them is do not tell them to go take their meds. 2 seconds later my dad gets up and yells at me! " To go take my meds. 2 seconds after he just watched you advising not to do this. 😢
Hi @user-yw8mp7uh4s! Thanks so much for taking the time to comment. I know this illness can be incredibly hard to navigate. I'd love to offer any support I can... If it interests you, I have a private community where you can message me directly and network with other people who are going through similar struggles. No pressure of course, but it would be great to have you join us. I'll include a link below:
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
Take extra good care of yourself @Sunflowers-like-these and I hope you will continue to stop by the channel.
I appreciate you =)
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
-Rob Whittaker, Polar Warriors
I've been a polar- roid for 50 years. Crazy crazy 50 years!!
I didn't feel guilt, I just react to negativity towards me! Im bipolar and hyperthyroid! A combination that is life threatening! I'm very blunt. Amazingly my friends find it interesting and entertaining. The truth sounds like a joke, I find humor in everything.I used to own a bar ! I was the entertainment. Had everyone laughing and dancing with me. Then I would all them to the bar and they laughed so much, they were thirsty as hell. It was great! Bipolar was a plus !? Amazing! But true.😂🎉
Your energy is contagious!
-Rob
www.patreon.com/PolarWarriors
❤