That's all true! She said it was too much pressure for her to have daily/weekly contact. She wants me to be at a distance to her, and I decided to go no contact because I'm not going to settle for anyone's breadcrumbs. But every morning she stalks me on social media and is still cynical enough to admit it!🤦♀ Now I understand that if I don't block her, I'm still feeding her with my energy and making her think that she still controls my life 🙉 These people's minds are so crazy... 🤦♀
Why post tho? It seems like only people who are still on the apps enjoy being judgmental or much too political. I tried to get back into IG and FB, after being off it for six years bc I finally felt healed enough and it was only the most extreme people I knew left online, my saner friends I’d have liked to reconnect with from those old towns have left FB and IG too and that’s fine. We’re all busy now with local things. If I had kept posting all that time I guess the narcs would still care but I must have felt free bc they were gone lol. I have nothing anymore that isn’t anonymous. 💜🌸 it’s a beautiful freedom. And I left my fitness IG again bc it was all bots and strange catfish types. I was never on Linkdin or Twitter much and snap is just my hubby. 🤷🏼♀️ after this it’ll just be local people for hobbies on those meetup apps or text.
An unhealed Dismissive avoidant. Psychologists coddle them, because they are human beings after all. But in the end, they are narcissists through and through
No matter how much you tell a narcissist you know their true agenda they still stalk you and make wanna feel like you're constantly walking on eggshells.
Please know what he is saying is true. Not only for exs but also family, acquaintances, coworkers, etc.. They will all lurk even if nothing on you can be found.
Good. Let them watch. I welcome it. When they go on my profile, they see me happy succeeding in my career and in my love-life. But when I visit them once in a blue moon out of curiosity, there is absolutely no growth in their life. Just more mirroring of other people's interests and characters. The difference between a narc/bpd person stalking an ex on social media and a survivor, is that the survivor does it for the sake of getting closure. Did the break up affect them? Did we even mean something do them? As for the other side, it's for control and the need to assert it in some way or form. After getting rid of my BPD ex, I found myself in a pit of sorrow I had to crawl out of. I didn't only crawl out of the pit, I climbed the mountain too. IF she truly visits me, she sees me far more happy than when I was with her.
I think of it as an effort to steal my fire, and extinguish my spark. If anyone is sucking the oxygen out of the room and makes me feel diminished rather than nourished, I hold no contact or at least avoid sharing too much time and space with them. They can stalk my social media, there's not much fuel there for them. I refuse to live in fear of stalkers.
I agree with you that in order to be mentally and emotionally stable and healthy, you cannot walk around looking over your shoulder! If you leave a situation because someone was trying to control you, but after you leave, you can't live a normal life because you are always looking over your shoulder, or you are always worried about that person that you left, seeking revenge, then even though you have left the person, they are still controlling you through FEAR! Looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life is no way to live!
Thank You So Very Much For Sharing This I Needed To Hear This. For Over 9 Yrs Being In A Relationship With A Malignant Narcissit This Person Has Destroyed My Self Confidence Self Worth Self Esteem. He Would Use Me And Immediately After Getting His Needs Met He Would Discard Me Cruelly Telling Me To Never Message Him Again I Was Treated Like An Object Only To Service Him Nothing More He Treats Me Like I Don't Exist. This Person Has Destroyed Me.
The whole manipulationship was on his terms. He called the shots. I didn’t feature. It was a transactional non reciprocal ‘relationship’. They are drainers of all that is good in you until there’s absolutely nothing left for you to give. I’ve gone pretty much ‘ghost’ so he can’t find out anything about me and that’s the way it will stay. I’ve removed all his control. I descended and now I’m working on ascending and he doesn’t need to know that. I know that and that’s all that matters now.
Social media rarely ever gives anything near a complete picture… but this is not altogether surprising. Keep em guessing! Edited to add: I will say it again; it’s a game. They are playing with your heart. It’s cold and calculated.
I would say don't make social media public. You probably should do that anyway. That's just me. Otherwise, you seem like a narcissist worried about what others are doing.
That's all true! She said it was too much pressure for her to have daily/weekly contact. She wants me to be at a distance to her, and I decided to go no contact because I'm not going to settle for anyone's breadcrumbs. But every morning she stalks me on social media and is still cynical enough to admit it!🤦♀ Now I understand that if I don't block her, I'm still feeding her with my energy and making her think that she still controls my life 🙉 These people's minds are so crazy... 🤦♀
What if they see u with someone new that looks nothing like them?
Why post tho? It seems like only people who are still on the apps enjoy being judgmental or much too political. I tried to get back into IG and FB, after being off it for six years bc I finally felt healed enough and it was only the most extreme people I knew left online, my saner friends I’d have liked to reconnect with from those old towns have left FB and IG too and that’s fine. We’re all busy now with local things. If I had kept posting all that time I guess the narcs would still care but I must have felt free bc they were gone lol. I have nothing anymore that isn’t anonymous. 💜🌸 it’s a beautiful freedom. And I left my fitness IG again bc it was all bots and strange catfish types. I was never on Linkdin or Twitter much and snap is just my hubby. 🤷🏼♀️ after this it’ll just be local people for hobbies on those meetup apps or text.
An unhealed Dismissive avoidant. Psychologists coddle them, because they are human beings after all. But in the end, they are narcissists through and through
No matter how much you tell a narcissist you know their true agenda they still stalk you and make wanna feel like you're constantly walking on eggshells.
I must’ve caused a significant injury then. Hallelujah
Please know what he is saying is true. Not only for exs but also family, acquaintances, coworkers, etc.. They will all lurk even if nothing on you can be found.
Good. Let them watch. I welcome it. When they go on my profile, they see me happy succeeding in my career and in my love-life.
But when I visit them once in a blue moon out of curiosity, there is absolutely no growth in their life. Just more mirroring of other people's interests and characters.
The difference between a narc/bpd person stalking an ex on social media and a survivor, is that the survivor does it for the sake of getting closure. Did the break up affect them? Did we even mean something do them? As for the other side, it's for control and the need to assert it in some way or form. After getting rid of my BPD ex, I found myself in a pit of sorrow I had to crawl out of. I didn't only crawl out of the pit, I climbed the mountain too. IF she truly visits me, she sees me far more happy than when I was with her.
I always know when he's going to say, "Thanks for watching."
I think of it as an effort to steal my fire, and extinguish my spark. If anyone is sucking the oxygen out of the room and makes me feel diminished rather than nourished, I hold no contact or at least avoid sharing too much time and space with them. They can stalk my social media, there's not much fuel there for them. I refuse to live in fear of stalkers.
I agree with you that in order to be mentally and emotionally stable and healthy, you cannot walk around looking over your shoulder! If you leave a situation because someone was trying to control you, but after you leave, you can't live a normal life because you are always looking over your shoulder, or you are always worried about that person that you left, seeking revenge, then even though you have left the person, they are still controlling you through FEAR! Looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life is no way to live!
Thank You So Very Much For Sharing This I Needed To Hear This. For Over 9 Yrs Being In A Relationship With A Malignant Narcissit This Person Has Destroyed My Self Confidence Self Worth Self Esteem. He Would Use Me And Immediately After Getting His Needs Met He Would Discard Me Cruelly Telling Me To Never Message Him Again I Was Treated Like An Object Only To Service Him Nothing More He Treats Me Like I Don't Exist. This Person Has Destroyed Me.
What about if you are not on Social Media....AT ALL?
Only narcissists use social media where they post pictures and constant updates on their lives for their 300 or 3000 "friends" to see.
The whole manipulationship was on his terms. He called the shots. I didn’t feature. It was a transactional non reciprocal ‘relationship’. They are drainers of all that is good in you until there’s absolutely nothing left for you to give. I’ve gone pretty much ‘ghost’ so he can’t find out anything about me and that’s the way it will stay. I’ve removed all his control. I descended and now I’m working on ascending and he doesn’t need to know that. I know that and that’s all that matters now.
Your relationship was just like mine. I'm struggling to get to the point you are at. I know I gotta get there.
@@joesywells758you will get there. Keep going. Never give up or in.
I love your videos Joe, they’ve been so helpful!🌹
Excellent video as always.
Social media rarely ever gives anything near a complete picture… but this is not altogether surprising. Keep em guessing!
Edited to add: I will say it again; it’s a game. They are playing with your heart. It’s cold and calculated.
Great video!
I would say don't make social media public. You probably should do that anyway. That's just me. Otherwise, you seem like a narcissist worried about what others are doing.
Ty 🕊️✨🙏🎯🙏🪽🫶