Why your DNA matches don't respond (and how you can fix it)
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- čas přidán 12. 07. 2023
- Getting a genetic match on AncestryDNA or 23andMe to respond can be hard. Here are the most common reasons why they don't -- and how you can increase the odds of getting an answer.
🔴 Common pitfalls in DNA for genealogy: • What You NEED to Know ...
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➡Avoid the pitfalls in DNA testing with these tips:
I can’t understand people sometimes, if someone contacted me and we were related in anyway, I’d love to hear from them and be very interested in anything they could help me with or anything I could help them with. Maybe we can’t figure anything out 😂😂😂 who knows. But always be polite to people if they take the time to contact you. It doesn’t cost you a penny to be polite people. Thank you all for taking the time to read my message people and I wish you all the luck in the world in your journey of your ancestors. 🇮🇪🇮🇪🇮🇪
Hi Amy. My DNA test resulted in a surprise 1st cousin whom I reached out to last year. She read my message but hasn't responded (yet), and I suspect it's because of one of the reasons you've mentioned here. Maybe her parentage is/was a surprise to her, or she's adopted and not ready or interested in connecting. I hope she reaches out one day!
The worst experience I have had was someone I reached out to who was from a branch I wasn’t familiar with. They immediately responded with questions for me - which I answered. But they NEVER answered any of mine. ALL my info was put into their tree with no attribution but several errors. I never heard again when I suggested corrections or collaboration. It was very aggravating.
Another "trick" is to check the profile page for the user you are sending the message to - you access that by clicking on their account name. At a minimum it lists when they joined and when they last logged into their account but it can include lots of other information like a description of who they are, their age, how experienced they are, and who they are researching. This can give you a pretty good indication as to whether they are active and if they are, how to craft your message to increase the change you will get a response. You can ever check later to see if they have logged on and (likely) seen your message.
For the record, distant cousins get me excited. These are the people that corroborate ancestry from centuries ago. That's certainly been the case for me.
Excellent video. I refuse to do DNA for some of these reasons. I know that my mother's father was adopted. I'm afraid of getting matches for his biological side of the family. It will just open up a can of worms...
Interesting thoughts. You know I have a 4th cousin who reached out to me and she was adopted. I guess that was a different case. She really wanted to find out about the family. We talked on Skype and she wanted to learn everything there was to know about the family. I helped her out and we became friends. =D
My cousin travelled to northern Italy where our Great Grandparents immigrated from. When he arrived at the village he spoke with numerous people to see if they knew anyone with our surname. Everyone he spoke with told him don’t bother looking for relatives because they won’t speak with him. The reason was because they thought family coming from the US were looking for something, be it personal property, land or physical property that they wanted a share of.
Two different DNA companies, my brother and I ended up less than seventy percent a match between us
I have over 2,000 ppl I can't figure out where they go... No one responds especially they ones that are the closest matches🤦
The reason I took a DNA test was so future generations can find
Great video. I think there are a few things on Ancestry you can also do to maximize the potential for a response that you didn't mention. Firstly I would say that if they've got a tree, linked or unlinked, with a certain number of people on it (the more the better chance) then they are interested in genealogy and not just an Ethnicity Estimate and might be willing to respond. Then before sending a message click through to your DNA match's profile page by clicking on the name and see when they last logged into Ancestry, and also their age and when they joined. Some people also put information about what they are researching and whether they are willing to help (I do this and even though it's few and far between many others do as well). If they've not logged in for a while then you can still send a message but don't expect a response. Maybe this is being a bit of a stalker but after sending a message to say someone who hasn't say logged in 3-11 months, to back to their profile and see if they have logged in since you sent the message. If they haven't they won't have read the message and so you're not going to get a response.
Nice job! I would add some things to your advice section. I know you were keeping it short and know these things.
Thanks for this, some things I hadn't considered. I've have a 594.98 cM match, that I would love to speak to, even more so as I can see it is from a 'brick wall' part of my family but hasn't responded. I introduced myself, along with the parts of the tree where I believe our paths cross and willingness to share information, very informal but no response. A month later I followed up again informal, to let them know I understand they may not want to talk but that if they ever changed their mind they know how to contact me. I hope one day to hear from them as it's such a big match, and could knock down a wall my grandfather couldn't even help with.
I am familiar with all the companies. I agree. The messenger system is not the best in letting you know you have a message waiting. Sometimes, I'm wondering how many years ago the person did the test. Sometimes, the person is not alive anymore or changed email address.
Great advice.
Some of my DNA matches, who I knew well for years before DNA, have passed away. One is in hospice care right now. I wish there was a way to alert people to this. I do not manage any of their kits. 😢
Thank you! Your recommendations are very good. If I'm interested especially in some match, I try to introduce myself very detail as much as possible (as well as my question to him/her). This makes future conversation more possible
I've been using your suggested approach in the contact message of explaining how I think we're related. Even still, the response rate on 23andMe is well under 1 in 10, though Ancestry has been a little better. It's worth it though to keep trying. I've had a few responses that have solved puzzles -- in one case hearing from a fifth cousin who still lives near the Scottish island community my ancestors came from in 1851.