Why Your Partner Feels ATTACKED When You Try To Help Them

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In this video, I am going to talk about...
- Why your partner feels attacked when you try to help them or give them support.
- The Paradox of Control: Knowing the different levels of control and how they differ: What you can control, what you can't control and what you can influence
- Influence vs. control: how trying to change someone's mind causes reactance and how that leads to more resistance to you.
- The 2 ways the brain processes information and how it affects your partners reaction: Fast Gut Instinct vs. Slow Reasoned Analysis
- What it means when we say "Speak to the Horse, Not the Rider", how engaging your partner on an emotional level and not a logical level is key to engaging with them deeply and building emotional safety.
- Building the Trust Pyramid: Comfort, compassion, connection, comprehension, credibility.
- Ways to ensure you're engaging with your partner in a deep level: managing emotions and active listening, internal and external validation
- Importance of building trust over time
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Chapter Titles with Timestamps:
00:00 - Introduction: Understanding Your Partner's Resistance
00:57 - Exploring the Paradox of Control
03:12 - The Importance of Emotional Connection Over Logic
04:40 - Building Trust Through the Trust Pyramid
08:05 - Communication & Validation To Build Trust
#ADHD #RelationshipAdvice #Marriagehelp #relationshipcoach

[@BeUltranormal]

👋🏻Hey all! Hope you enjoyed this one! Let me know if you've struggled with a stubborn partner!
🚨Come join my NEW Relationship Bootcamp! be.ultranormal.co/relationship-bootcamp?YTE065&
- Chris

[@nickegerton7220]

Thank you for an excellent video. I also have ADHD (got diagnosed in 2022 @ age 53). I am working hard to rebuild my relationship with my long suffering wife (who suffers with a chronic condition) and these videos help a lot. It’s takes a lot of practice and thought to put these plans into action, but is (hopefully) paying off. It’s is exhausting trying filter my thoughts patterns, but does get easier over time.

[@BeUltranormal]

Thanks so much for the kind words! That means a lot.
And yeah it can take a lot to finally recognize our own thought patterns and changing them over time.
Cultivating great relationships can feel difficult at first, but ultimately for us ADHDers, we are damn adaptable and some of the absolute best relationships I've seen have been ADHDers. We can absolutely use it to our advantage.
Keep growing!