To Experience REAL Love, Heal the Wounds From Parents You Couldn’t Save
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- čas přidán 15. 02. 2024
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Here’s the hard truth about the wounds of CPTSD and trauma: Some of the things you didn’t GET as a child, can’t be fixed directly. We can’t go back in time. We can’t be children again to receive the proper love and care we needed then. And we can’t save people we lost. But we CAN learn to fill our lives with love and support NOW, and start working on the triggers, and the distorted thinking, and the self-defeating behaviors that are the natural byproduct of trauma in your childhood. When you do, it changes your thinking, your relationships, and your capacity to recognize red-flag people (vs people who can truly love you back). In this video I respond to a letter from a man who is attached to a woman who keeps him at arm's length, but won't let him go.
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I am touched by this story and your wisdom, kindness and empathy. 👍
Glad you're here :) -Calista@TeamFairy
@@CrappyChildhoodFairy😊
This woman seems so genuine, warm but not smarmy. She seems to care. She seems to know the things we have suffered. I'm totally alone. While I watch her videos, I feel someone is with me. Thank you, fairy.
this is a good page, people here are nice 🙏🌸
She is genuine ❤
She is absolutely genuine 10000000%
I just learned a new word (smarmy) thank you.
Me too 😊
I was struck when she said that when you relive the abandonment, you feel like you’re going to die. A boyfriend cheated on me and I literally thought I was going to die. Guess I was reliving my childhood abandonment. This poor guy. I hope he finds happiness
Honestly put me right back in my stressed , worried , non trusting energy
Hope you are healing! It’s hard
I have been there!
I don't have kind feelings towards an ex who cheated and manipulated. Now I realize many of the people I dated would never live up to my hopes . I was looking for love but my eyes were shut .
I relate, when I got rejected i felt so sad and uncomftorable and wothless. Like if I was enough noone would leave me
I relive my abandonment a lot, seems I can’t avoid it even when I’m actively working on it, not allowed to ❤ sending strength
I wanted to burst out crying when you read they never talked to the children about the od and what had happened but just took them from the house without their belongings. Crushing 💔
That bothers me about the homeless as well. They leave their sleeping bag. Their bags w stuff. Sad.
Now aged 79 I can endorse everything you say. The first 16 years of my life were hell. My life was beyond complicated. But I fought . Now after the end of a relationship I am drowning, no back up resources.
I am so sad that at your age you are facing a feeling of abandonment again! It is especially hard (I am 77) as we age - I know this first hand,unfortunately! But you are a survivor and that is so commendable. Buy yourself some flowers, hold your head up high… sending you a big hug❤️
Ditto to your life strength and hugs for you
Cherish yourself. Maybe a long walk every other day. Those have been so comforting to me since my divorce. Sending hugs. Reading Murakami novels has also been a great comfort for years. I borrow them from the public library. If they r all out they usually are now I ask them to reserve one for me.
My alarm bells went off very early in Richard's description of this woman ... So glad my instincts were confirmed by Anna's analysis of her insincere/manipulative behaviour. Heart goes out to you Richard you are so deserving of real love and care - wishing you well in your recovery.
People don’t really help when you need them
Romance can be strictly emotional. As an asexual, I have experienced it many times. Emotion and physical intimacy can each exist without the other.
I hope the person in the letter can find real healing. 🙏🏻
"Richard"
My heart breaks for you, but in a lot of ways, I empathize with you.
So glad that you're on a path of sobriety. I hope this helped you as much as it is helping many of us.
I’ve had it both ways. I enjoyed his company, but not sexually attracted. When I told him, he never called again. Good for him. When a guy dumped me but said we should hang out every so often, I said no because I knew I’d feel that longing and hope. Hope is dope.
Wow. Hope is dope. I have to remember this. I hold on to Hope even when there is absolutely none. I just can't get it through my fat head. Seems like I can't recognize it
Whenever I am in distress this really comes up in a very anxiety causing, chaos creating, shame filled, exhausting way. thanks anna for engaging with something so tricky to engage with. you're so gifted.❤
Can you talk some about how “abandonment” covers a lot of different situations? It took me doing a year-by-year analysis of my childhood to realize where a lot of my trauma came from, and it honestly feels embarrassing to say it because it sounds like nothing compared to that letter (and I know trauma isn’t a competition but it still feels that way)… when I was a baby, back when I don’t remember a lot, my mother had to be extra supportive of my dad’s career as a military officer, and she had to be this happy hostess and plan parties and have luncheons with the officers’ wives and stuff (I realized as an adult that everyone didn’t grow up in a house that could set up to have several dozen people over for a formal gathering with coffee service and appetizers at the ready). She and dad were so busy schmoozing his coworkers when I was a baby that I was mostly raised by a housekeeper… and we were NOT housekeeper people, believe me, it was all this show to make my dad look like a big shot. And this lasted until sometime after me being 18 months but before I turned 2, because dad got a new assignment and we moved just before my birthday.
My therapist helped me see that I was essentially neglected during those important months, and it’s possible that the lack of contact made me crave being away from my family. (By the time I was 6 we had moved two more times but I finally had my own room, and the first thing I did was go in there and close the door… and I’ve kind of never come out!)
So if someone reads this and sees themselves in it, just know that your trauma is real, even if it has a pretty bow on it to impress the neighbors.
Dr. Gabor Mate says even as an infant, before he could remember, he suffered abandonment trauma because his mother had to leave him to flee from Nazis. Even though his mother did it for the greater good it still left a deep impact on his subconscious mind.. your experience is very valid. 💜
Thank you, I really needed to read this. I was neglected too and the pain is real 💔
As a baby you couldn't have understood you were coming from a place of 'privilege" (as the annoying millennials say). All you knew is that your mom and dad were not giving you the attention you really needed.
Yes your experience is just as painful and valid as a heroin addict mother. This letter from is so sad and my parents were alcoholics but I relate more to your story. We are all on this healing journey together. Love you all, thank you Anna, you are a gift from heaven 💕
Thank you - your therapist’s assessment of you being neglected as a baby is on point. I was also neglected for my first two years, because my b-mum got really sick after my birth, then was adopted by parents with their own issues (including the same illness that had eventually forced mum to give me up, and alcoholism, among other things…), who I don’t know if I’ve ever been able to meaningfully connect with, emotionally or intellectually.
I’ve been in therapy for about three years, working through it all.
I walled that part of me off. Finally, I don’t get surprised or hurt anymore by people. I read a book that said something like -don’t give people the position or power in your life that only God should have. People are too fallible to depend on that way. Takes me about an hour to grieve someone who lets me down these days. ✌️
Well done for being six years sober, what a great accomplishment. If you can do that, I'm sure you are capable of establishing friendships and a close relationship as well. Take your time and don't rush, and remember...it's never too late.
Thank you for sharing these kind words :) -Calista@TeamFairy
And its so sad, when we worry that we have upset someone 😢
A big hug to Richard
I was abandoned by both my mother and father as a 4 year old ....raised by grand parents who made me feel a nuisance my whole child hood ...
My parents were not drunks or drug addicts ...
They were very young in the 70s ...21- 23...they just decided tgey had kuds too young ... Divorced and left my siblings and myself with my grandmother to raise...
My father rmarried and had a child to his new wife and raised his son being present..
My mother told me after she remarried her greatest regret was she was unable to give her new husband ..my stepfather a child ...
We were a litter of puppies no one wanted ...
I of course git married very young ... To an abuser who physically assaulted me ... Divorced at 30..
I waited till i was 43 to let anyone near my heart ... He was a narcissist and now at 53 i dont think i will ever be loved ...
I am scared through all my hurt, discard and my emotional pain i will leave this life having never been loved ....
Its hard
Ach, loobee. Love.
It is hard. Many individuals who you come into contact with don't have a clue. I hope you keep looking and find the individuals who do understand and who want to love and laugh with you. ❤
🤍🤍🤍 love comes in many ways, it’s amazing the love and genuine connection I have with my cats. I call them my heart medicine🙏🏽🤍 sending you love loobee!
at 43, i find tht the only love thts worth is God’s love . everybody else will hurt you in some ways. know tht you will be loved in heaven. take care wherever you are
Love and cherish yourself. Give the love time and patience they were too ignorant to give you guys when you were cute little kids. So sorry to hear about that. Maybe get in touch w your siblings.
I love you Anna ♥️ You made me realize I have CPTSD. You saved my life ♥️
Richard..you are an inspiration to me for writing and reaching out to CCF. We will heal and live better soon 🥰.
Damn I am crying sending hugs Richard. 😢😢😢
Me, too. Hugs Richard.
I sense manipulation too, I’m sorry he is in such a bad emotional state
one of the things I realized from my early life was when I was that unhealthy all I attracted were other unhealthy people, me being an empath attracted a lot of cluster bs, and it just encouraged messed up attachment, constant cycles of breaking up and getting back together, even with platonic friends. Everything was a rollercoaster because that felt normal.
Everytime I open up youtube, I always get videos about narcissism recommended. Yes they have helped me a lot in thoroughly understanding the development of my CPTSD. But at some point, you know enough. You've had enough. You've seen enough. You've adjusted yourself to it, coped with it, or you removed yourself from the situation at best. And try not to be vigilant. You've been through enough to know that watching these videos only repeat the trauma you're supposed to give a place. And that you have to move on.
Yes! I’ve been thinking exactly the same thing!
Good point
Oh yes! The narrative is always same! Sort of traps you in the narcissist hell! Break away and if a new topic comes up listen but make it rare. I found 2 new topics recently like the narc family Scapegoat! It helped me realize why that happened to me. Healed! Moved on! We never stop learning. It’s a long process. I try not to let this traumatize me. It has to give purpose.
So much love and support for the writer. You're a brave, bright person and far stronger than most and will be calmer and even more healthy with practice. ❤
I like the shut the door & lock it. Richard is sober 🙌🏼 and deserves a wonderful person! Love is coming to town❤
Frig ...that is a heartbreaking story lots of us have abondonment issues to different levels because of emotionally available parents but Richard's is another level. Finding your mom on the floor the victim of an OD ...yikes ...heartbreaking absolutely heartbreaking ...hopefully if Richard reads any of these comments he sees all of us pulling for him to find the peace love and joy we all are looking for. 🙏❤🙏
Hugs to you”Richard”
She said she has feelings for him but she just wants to be friends. She's giving out mixed messages.
Actions matter more than words. If she only wants to stay friends, that's the action, so she had no romantic feelings for him, but she wants to keep him around in case she actually feels it. The thing is, if a man accepts friendship when he actually doesn't want it, this fully unnattracts her. That was his mistake. Telling her he is only interested in dating and not friendship with her would be standing up for himself with a boundary. It shows some confidence in himself and clear direction and would go a long way toward attracting her as long as he is genuine with it. Plus, it's just the truth. It's amazing that Anna mentioned this.
Good comment @@Leoo117
Looks like she wants the attention but doesn't want to honor the connection fully, like a power game
Maybe she’s just scared she could get hurt
i hope his sisters are also healing
It’s so hard for me to accept the fact that my husband went through this as a child. Because I can’t go back and fix his childhood. Please understand that.
If you are feeling this way, please let people care for you now, even if they couldn’t be with you back in those crucial moments.
I'm so sorry for what you had to go through 😢
Oh Richard im so sorry
I feel like i have been that girl a million times. I like the company of a guy but he wants it to be sexual and i don't. I just want to be platonic. It creates the most awkward tension ever.
Same.. the problem is that a lot of guys can't stand it if a woman doesn't reciprocate their feelings & they simply do NOT respect your boundaries i.e. when you clearly indicate that you are not interested you are 'playing hard to get' or you're a b*tch
such great advice as always Anna (caring, supportive, understanding, direct, kind.)
That's a hard story. All your suggestions for him made total sense
she’s not emotionally available. just go to therapy. you’ll heal and be better able to decide who is a suitable partner because you’ll be a more suitable partner
Thank you, Richard for sharing your story. That took a lot of courage to reach out to Anna and know that so many of us would hear what you have been through and what you are going through now. Anna gave you many good ideas and much support and I am hoping you are feeling better. I once had a relationship where the man felt more, wanted more and I just felt a friendship. As great as our conversations were, I knew it wasn't fair to him and set him free. Many years later and I do not regret my decision. My feelings never changed about him becoming more in my life. I am glad I did this, for him and me. I now have time and energy to fill my life with the right people and right situations. Thank you, Anna, for your wisdom, compassion and desire to guide us all to a better life. Many blessings.
I was that "friend" once. Many years ago now I mmet someone I really liked and was about to fall in love with after knowing eachother about a month. But I had a holiday booked the other side of the planet, for a month. After 3 weeks, despite being in touch daily, I realised my feelings were changing and by the time I came back I realised they had changed and no longer were romantic, even though I still really liked this person. I talked about this change, which I could not really understand. We stayed friends with me checking in if that was ok still. I suddenly got dropped when a new romantic interest came along. Strangely this hurt badly as in my own weird way I had obviously invested deep feelings. I accepted this was right for my friend of course. I am bringing it up because I never felt manipulative though it was the exact same story. The exact same story. We even went on holiday together, as friends, in a twin room. To this day I don't know how and why my feelings changed but I suspect we could have been very close emotionally as well as physically. Which was more than my little cptsd heart could cope with. Sadly. Just an alternative explanation for the above. Perhaps neither are to blame, sad though the situation is. Though I daresay the advice doesn't change...
I came to also say I’m the CTPSD (girl) friend. I stated from the start I wasn’t interested romantically and not available for a relationship. But we have been hanging out regularly for meals, nights out and holidays. I know that my person is hoping my feelings would change, I just don’t have that romantic spark or sexual chemistry towards him however I love them as a person and enjoy their company. I don’t think that I’m malicious because I expressed my platonic capacity. I can’t be responsible for someone else’s limerant feelings. I absolutely have my own limerant feelings towards people (but it’s always the red flag, abandon you in a heart beat kind of guys). I feel for this guy in need of fairy’s help (and therapy) and I think suggesting he sees the friendship for what it is and embracing purely platonic love would be helpful. The benefits of not being in a sexual relationship or dating is that you don’t break up. You are there for each other and grow together
Thank you, Anna, for being so very, genuinely supportive, caring and klug (smart) with warm strength. I'm also proud of Richard and hope that he will be able to get through this difficult time. It's probably a good idea to have a friend aid him in getting to a professional. He also had/has an older sister (woman, now) who didn't abandon him in his youth. I didn't hear anything in the letter which could tell us what his hopes for a relationship are and if Richard wants, as you did, a family and a life, together.
Richard, I care and hope for the best for you. Thank you for sharing. Love.
Omg , you arnt a fairy your an angel ..absolutely amazing person thank god for you
At 60+ I just feel too broken.
Anna talks about “healing”, as a 60 year-old like a barely operating broken-down car, I just want “good enough”, not “like brand new”.
Good enough seems out of reach.@@BinkyTheElf1
I was abandoned by my mother because my 18 month old sister wouldn’t let her hold me!
And the best goes on…..
Your vedios about limerence helped me very much thank you there are saved me
Now i have some standars that iam afraid i can't found in a partner , i struggle to believe that i will be loved and be able to love and have a great relationship with this kind of person that i hope i can found😢💜
This story is really touching.
Some parts of it resemble what I went through life as a young child. Its like a pattern. I feel like this aboundonment issue happened to my both or either of my parents. My Dad actually lost the mother at a young age.The Father remarried.My Dad had no attention.from either parent.
So now I feel the only way is to heal ,remove the patterns so as to attract people who are also healed ,thus enabling us to live a great life with no abuse for us and the coming generation .
Thank You😊🙏🙏🙏💕💕💕
Finally. A letter from a male.
Nice to see a man wanting to heal!
There are many many men that are affected but they keep it to themselves
Thank you, Fairy 🧚♀️
That was really sad; I cried sad tears, as I felt everything that poor person was going through.
Fels odd to have vicarious pain, since I have plenty of my own.
I miss my dear wife terribly; RIP 🙏 😢
Love.
The looping, I do the looping all of the time.
I never got to go back for my things either. I spend a lot of time buying things off of thrift sites or eBay trying to reclaim my childhood. Idk if that’s healthy, but it feels healing for a moment.
Very long term sobriety and time has helped a lot.
I had some racism done to me and i felt loke everybody was above me.... its odd that so many people feel like me. And that i couldn't acknowledge them.
I’m so sorry.
Ty for this ❤
Thank you for being a part of our community :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I'm glad Richard wrote the letter🌱
I'm 'just happy' about this space, I'm heartbroken and drunk and exploring. I need to explore to the point I find some kind of sobriety.
If you go to different meetings, you will eventually find “your people”. Best wishes to you.
(Love this channel)
She’s playing with him.
This sounds like my life - except I was the older sister at 8 years old taking care of a 6, 4, and a new born.
Good relationships should feel like there is even footing. If you are sacrificing your needs and desires with no clear path to fulfilling them, then move on to find someone who matches you better. With nearly 9 billion people, there is no reason to accept being strung along. Take care of yourself, find the things that bring you joy and watch as people magically come out of the woodwork to share it with you or even better, are on a similar journey.
Love yourself so you are able to Love others this will help to balance your life in the right direction ❤
awesome thank you
I loved the topic but also felt that using alcoholism as the "turning point" to realizing one has a problem caused me to start looking for "cop-outs" in the narrative. By this , I mean that many people have felt these same symptoms and feelings due to a less than stellar childhood but far less of them end up being alcoholics or drug addicts. I would like to hear about the multitude of people with these same scars that soldier on without the aid of alcohol, drugs (prescribed or otherwise), or the necessary therapist sessions. Many do not succeed in their chosen career because of self-sabotage that they are unaware of and much of it can be and is very subtle. The after effects of abandonment as a child live on forever without self-healing. And I admit to resentment of people whom act out their frustration with socially unacceptable behavior that the rest of us must endure and pay for. PLEASE, CREATE A POST THAT EXPLORES THE TRUER AND MORE SUBTLE FORMS OF THIS MALADY, WITHOUT THE OVERYLAY OF SUBSTANCES THAT CAUSE BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. If truth be told, I have oft decided that many of these self-abusers are narcissists-in-hiding! Whether that be the end result of someone suffering mental/emotional abuse or not, they seem to me to have found a way to get the attention they need, but then because they are not really healed, they commence to discount the help they receive and ultimately fall back on old patterns. Why not use these healing techniques on those whom struggle on thru the pain, have families, jobs, etc., and never get that attention? I am just sayin'.
I'm sorry dear Rick... 😊.. I don't have any friends and I'm depressed - on depression medication... And I'm still living in the place of trauma with the people who harm me.. ( I'm living with my parents, my kids are with me as well 😢..)
I can't escape the situation though it is getting worse day by day... But this has been my life all these 40 years...😭... I wanted to save my kids, but ...I'm in a country where women can't do much about their own life 😭
Anyways, wishing you the best 🙏🏼❤️.. Love you. I want you to be happy 😊
Great video and advice anna. Thank you Richard for sharing, your story is so helpful to the community as we all have difficulties to heal. So sorry you had that childhood but we're all in this together with our complicated histories, moving forward and learning to look after ourselves well. Prioritise yourself, I think your friend has her own issues that aren't helpful to you and I agree with Anna's statement to her. Keep going with your healing and all the best to you ❤😊. Xx
Thanks for sharing these words of encouragement :) -Calista@TeamFairy
CPTSD has only become accepted knowledge in the psychiatric community within the last 2 years or so. I am 72 and the damage l have suffered from the mental 'health' community/ pharmaceuticals has harmed and inhibited my journey to self-love.
I've seen these types of feelings in myself and in others, and when we discussed them we discovered the underlying behavior was addiction. We can be addicted to much more than the things we put in our body, for example video games. But addicted to love is a real thing in my experience, and in reality its an addiction to the validation, attention, emotional bonding we didn't receive in our childhood. And, if I can add one more thing which may seem really harsh but I feel its important to say it, we don't actually care about the other person we're addicted to, its only the validation, emotional bonding we seek in them and we confuse that for love. Seeing the addiction allows us the opportunity to be free of it.
Being friends with a wonderful, warm, caring and loving person helps, too. Love has to do with my seeing the other, relating to them and finding out how beautiful they are and not my validating me with their interest.
@@howardcohen6817 Yes, how beautiful love can be when we genuinely care about the other. Something I am working towards. Thanks for sharing.
@@ninastar5833 You're welcome. Love.
Im sorry Richard❤ you are so strong , keep going! The sun will shine soon , I’ll pray for it 🙏🏼
Thanks for sharing these kind words :) -Calista@TeamFairy
I hate that I found this channel. It only proves that I'm beyond help, and things can't get better. I don't want this, I don't even want to bother trying to get better anymore this is all bullshit I'm sick of it all
Trauma-driven thinking can be discouraging. But never forget: Healing is possible!
Nika@TeamFairy
When ppl string you along to get an ego boost or energy out of you, can you ever change that dynamic? How did it happen in the first place?
I know ppl like this and they have stable relationships and friendships with other ppl. How do they have stable friendships and are healthy in those, but target certain ppl to siphon energy from?
I go thru this, and started resenting it. I finally just dropped a few cold turkey. I knew they were trying to turn me in to a free therapist. Nooooo more energy vampires in 2024 to include family. I literally slammed the door shut!!!!
hear hear!!! Tks Anna
00:00 🧠 Trauma's lasting impact: Childhood wounds can't be fixed directly, but healing involves addressing triggers, distorted thinking, and self-defeating behaviors.
01:18 🏠 Traumatic upbringing: Richard shares his experience of a chaotic childhood marked by addiction, instability, and self-reliance from a young age.
03:37 💔 Relationship struggles: Richard's romantic relationships are impacted by his trauma, leading to anxiety, jealousy, and difficulties forming healthy bonds.
05:56 🔄 Unresolved trauma: Richard's current emotional state reflects past trauma, including depression, abandonment issues, and attachment difficulties.
07:19 🤝 Seeking support: Encouragement to seek professional help and establish boundaries in relationships to prioritize personal well-being and healing.
09:33 💡 Empowerment and hope: Emphasizing the importance of self-awareness, seeking healthy relationships, and prioritizing personal growth beyond past traumas.
People who 'just wants to be friends' sometimes simply just want to be friends and are not necessarily 'feeding off your energy' and messing with your feelings.. this guy had it tough in life but it's not up to anyone else to fix him, and if she clearly stated she wants a platonic friendship he needs to respect that, the fact that he has feelings for her does not obligate her to entertain his advances at the expense of her own feelings (or lack thereof).
My mother recently did another despicable thing to me, and did another disgusting thing by compromising my daughter (her granddaughter of all things). I tried again, 54 years of trying actually, to give her another chance. Today, I finally learned, after her 54 years of constant abuse, I HAVE TO move on; otherwise, if I don’t, I might lose my mind, my last chance to live a healthy life where someone healthy can love me. Thank you CCF for continuing on with your work. I know you hate this kind of praise, but it is crucial for others to know, we ALL must help each other, encourage each other and give hope to all who suffer from selfish, sick, and utterly disgusting behavior of supposed “parents.” For me, I like to see this despicable parental behavior as my reason and drive to be the BEST parent I never had: a diamond from the coal.
I don’t want love anymore. I’ve dated a lot of people and I’m just done. And I’m not sad about it. I’m happier single and I feel like I’ve wasted so much time trying to be enough for someone else. I feel like so many videos about healing are only healing so we can be good for someone else finally. So we can finally get that love we’ve been craving, and then it’s still for this hypothetical love. We’re still making choices for someone who doesn’t even exist yet or maybe won’t. Why is there no videos on how to be happy single?
Do you hate yourself? I've seen people get into good relationships with friends and lovers by not even setting a goal to do that. They just stop pleasing people and end up meeting people that actually did like them.
The only reason was , it was my chance to get far, far from my NM..
I did not really love him.
I didn't know how..
He was good to Me.
Thank you Fairy❤
People can have romantic interactions without sex or kissing. In some religions and cultures sex and kissing and even hugging is taboo before marriage, and yet romances do develop, they just get married before doing all that physical stuff. Its not just all loveless arranged marriages in those communities.
2:28 😢Why do adults think it is better to ignore and avoid disturbing behaviour/events? Address the elephant in the room. Especially when a mother dies and the children find her. I feel for him, he shouldn't have been left alone in those thoughts.
Seems like she gave mixed signals. He needs to create boundaries. Tell her you cannot be friends, it is too painful because you are still hoping for more. She needs to walk away if she respects you.
Trauma messed up my marriage Working on it tho
If you haven't yet ( if you have can someone link it please?) could you talk about the correlation and overlap between CPTSD and ADD? Because I know I have one and suspect I may have both as ADHD runs in my family. I'm a woman so I'm not hyper, or else the childhood trauma beat the hyperactive part out of me (metaphorically speaking, I wasn't the one getting beaten...)
Hi! I’ve also wondered about this too and found some great information from Dr. Gaber Mate on trauma and ADHD.
I think it makes a lot of sense.
Also, ADHD doesn’t require hyperactivity…
I hope some of this helps! I too am on a journey with adhd… being diagnosed very late in life
❤
She's really good
I like this, to tell her first. Maybe write her letter. I did that and helped me have that closure. That you did what you can. And if she doesn't respond to move on. Anna's quote in one of her video helps. If God or Higher Power meant for you to be together you can't mess up and if he doesn't you cannot force it" Love and light ❤
12:28 ❤❤❤
Funny thing is my mother told my therapist directly that she abandoned me, so I guess I don’t need to ask myself that question.
Richard, you deserve better than this.
I'm in a similar situation, I've not left my bedroom for over a month now,this is 1 episode of many,I also live in the uk and have been through the nhs mental services 3 times,the waiting lists to see professionals are years long,they litterally told me they dont have the services to help me,I'm on the waiting list to see a psychiatrist now and theyve told me it will be another 2 year wait,I cant afford to go private,I know it's nearly time to give up,I'm 44 this week,its too late for me.
It is not too late. I strongly recommend the Daily Practice. It is a free course that provides the technique that led to Anna's own healing and she uses it to this day. It's a great tool to process fears and resentment and it can help with getting regulated. Give it a try if you haven't already! You will find it here: bit.ly/CCF_DailyPractice
Nika@TeamFairy
Where can I tell my story to get some insight 🥰
Thank you for watching! You can send an "Ask the Fairy" letter from here: bit.ly/CCF_Letters
Nika@TeamFairy
Anna, do you have a video...i have trouble speaking up for myself. I was not allowed and i was constantly emotionally abandoned in childhood
You may find these videos helpful:
czcams.com/video/fsMkmbaUZIk/video.html
czcams.com/video/yCOTW9EE18I/video.html
-Calista@TeamFairy
I'm trying so hard 🙏❤️🩹
Don't you give up on me! You keep fighting! Virtual hugs to you, my friend 🤗
You don’t have to strive so hard. You’re enough as you are and deserve all the love and kindness that all the strangers in these videos do. You are unique and you may struggle, but you’re important. Thanks for being here.
Me too…..let’s keep healing together 💖
We're all rooting for you :) -Calista@TeamFairy
@@CrappyChildhoodFairy thank you for hearing me 🙏🌼
Abandoned with my 3 by my father after my mother ran away 1500 miles to Florida, so he could go form a family with his mistress and her 5 kids noless!!! Who does that??? Sent to awful foster homes and a children’s home of course! Destroyed emotionally and never loved! Pretty hard start. I was a pretty well adjusted kid to some degree in school as a good student and athlete, but my adult life was marred with hell with people of course! 😩 lonely but excited if anyone gave me attention. Sadly a narcissist attractant! ☹️
I hurt. I am know what you’re reading from this young man but you’re not thinking about the other person. She might have also have some kind of difficult help with a relationship and you’re only been one sided with him . About her she might be having a difficult time also.
The video seems to skip a part at 5:31...
Because I haven’t healed from abandonment I continue to find myself in abusive relationships.
This is what my life was like as a kid but my dad was in prison
💟
So what’s the telltale sign? I missed it
This 'she' in the story sounds avoidant vis-a-vis emotionally unavailable.
Killer advice.
I just want to hug Richard and congratulate him for making it to this point where he is now. That really is cause for celebration, and I want to acknowledge it...good job! And I would like to assure Richard that he has found the right place to be, with Anna, & her community. Here he will find truth, support, education, help, & much love...Anna, her staff, and her 'followers' are great! To everyone here, ☆Blessed Be☆
Subtle last sentence :)
Hmm, I don't see this free download list of romantic manipulation.
Richard is very open and he really knows how to reflect on himself.
Having this trauma sometimes makes you blind to a lot of things. He really knows what is going on. He is well on his way to heal. Beautiful man ❤
I would love to share my story... I'm just not sure if you charge for this or how to go about it...
I also am a bit nervous... I really want clarity, but scared of judgement. I've made posts on here and people have agreed my situation sucks but... Part of me just feels people would laugh at me for things or something.
So many emotions......
I also have... so much to say... The video would probably be 10 hours long....
I accept letters with a question for me to answer about a present-day issue. Most letters submitted cannot be chosen because they are too long, too past-focused (no question) or too explicit. The focus in this channel is not the past story, but how to make our lives better now. If you have a question you submit it using the link in the description section. Thanks!
@@CrappyChildhoodFairyThank you, I appreciate your response.
I am looking to heal. Your videos, and others, have been very beneficial in that regard.
If I were to share my story the details would probably be too long, as there are a lot of points to talk about.
I thank you for your response and everything with that though, I wish you and everyone here the best on your/their journey!
how do I write to you to tell you my story?
I think you can just send her a letter via the Contact page on her website
The link to the form and instructions is in the description section under all the videos.