The 13 hardest things about having a baby (so far)
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- čas přidán 5. 07. 2024
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Today’s video is an open and honest conversation about parenthood. Although I'm still very early in my motherhood journey, here have been the 13 hardest things so far. These are all the things I wish I knew before having a baby.
Ok, so full disclaimer, my mom (and a lot of other moms in my life) seem to say that THEY DID TELL ME ALL OF THIS before I had my baby, Milo, but that a person isn’t able to fully wrap their brain around this or understand the complexities until it's happening to them. So, maybe that's the case-I don't know…. But, in today’s video, I wanted to have an honest conversation about the difficulties and challenges of navigating motherhood as someone who is currently DEEP IN THOSE EARLY STRUGGLES.
Of course, my goal is not to scare or dissuade anyone from having children. I promise to make another video sharing all of the BEST things about having a baby because there are SO many amazing aspects to motherhood!
CHAPTERS:
00:00-2:10 - intro
02:11-03:51- 1
03:52-05:34 - 2
05:35-07:26 - 3
07:27-08:40 - 4
08:41-09:41 - my motherhood superguide
09:42-10:55 - 5
10:56-12:31 - 6
12:32-13:36 - 7
13:37-15:27 - 8
15:28-16:29 - 9
16:30-17:37 - 10
17:38-18:55 - 11
18:56-19:50 - 12
19:51-21:31 - 13
In this video, I discuss the hardest things I’ve had to deal with so far in my transition to motherhood. The first few revolve around the postpartum experience (navigating baby blues, physical pain and recovery, etc.), so they're only relevant for people who birthed their babies, but as the video progresses, I talk more about the universal experiences of motherhood that affect almost everyone.
I share everything from the toll that parenthood has taken on my relationship with my partner (and every other relationship I have), to sorting through the overwhelming amount of information you have to learn at every stage of your baby’s life, to navigating a new (seemingly inflexible) schedule. I also talk about the financial impact of having a baby, the lack of sleep and “me” time, and how I have had to learn to balance work and family life, among other things.
The heart of this video is me remembering those early days of parenting-feeling like overnight, my entire life had changed and my world as I knew it was just OVER. And in that raw emotional time, it was hard to see light at the end of the tunnel and it was difficult to trust that my life might ever look normal again.
If someone like me felt this way-a person who truly knew she wanted to have a baby, got pregnant intentionally, and was generally prepared for it-I cannot imagine how this experience must feel for someone who is less certain about parenthood to begin with.
Honestly, even navigating away from those early days and moving forward into deeper stages of motherhood, I find that there's often a HEAVINESS that comes along with being a parent.
Whether you're thinking you might want to have a baby at any time in the future, currently trying to conceive, are currently pregnant, OR are already a new parent...the superguide I made is EVERYTHING you could ever ask for, and I'm so excited to share it with you. shopluciefink.com/pages/mothe...
Motherhood has been an incredible journey filled with love, joy, and challenges, and I know I'm just at the beginning of it with an almost 2-year-old.
If you're currently on this path or considering starting a family in the future, remember that every challenge is an opportunity for growth, and that there are just as many AMAZING ELEMENTS of parenthood that make this journey well worth it!
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Thank you so much for watching! I hope you subscribe to my channel for more videos. - Zábava
I would LOVE to hear more about the long conversations you had with grandparents about boundary setting and expectation setting!
+10000, haha
Same! My mother hasn't spoken to me for a month now because I for a second time told her not to share dozens of photos of my baby online 🙈
As someone who is very unsure about whether to have a baby in the future as I think I’m painfully aware of the hard bits, I’d be really interested to hear about the best bits about having kids!
Yesss will make❤
I second this as I am in this boat too.
Trust me, the good outweighs the bad 🤗❤️
I second this. Would love a video with your favorite parts about parenting. :-)
Kids are the best thing ever😭
I don't have kids, and don't want them, but I loved this video because my best friend is pregnant and I feel like it helped me know how I can support her. I especially want to make sure I check in with her and not just her baby.
This is VITAL I'm so happy you can use the video for this purpose!!
omg LOL I'm 30 I don't know why I said 31 😂 my bday is in Aug!!
Mommy brain 😂
We have a 2 month old newborn and you are spot on with your points. I wouldn't trade motherhood for the world but also didn't realise how much things would change. It is finding yourself again in a new way and creating a new normal.
I can't help but wonder how the heck our moms did it...before youtube, countless books, podcasts, resource guides, etc. I think a large part of the 'pressure' of today's pregnancies is that feeling of having to do/know/explore/prepare it ALL! So many generations were born and raised without all this info overload. I think some of this is also cultural. A friend had and raised a baby in France, where kids generally fit into parents' schedules, and not the other way around. Your honesty is refreshing and the work you're doing is wonderful for the current and future generations of moms. Keep up the good work!
I agree wholeheartedly!!! Cultural!!!!! ❤
Because they had large communities and normally multiple siblings. Western society is very individual and most people today don’t have 9-10 siblings and all of the extended family support
I currently am 2 weeks postpartum with my first baby and YES thank you for making this. The emotional weight of parenthood is 1000% not something I was prepared for… also just generally missing the ease of our pre-parenthood life… I was prepared for the joy of being a parent but not at all prepared for the baby blues.
How are you feeling now ? I am 37 and it's now or never for me but I am just so scared of regretting it.
I kept a simple list on my phone of all my basic essentials when I had a newborn. We kept things quite minimal and good most things second hand. It felt so good to be able to pass that on!
Thank you so much for continuing to share! I started following you a couple of years before you had Milo, and then I had my baby a bit after you in the summer of 2022. We have a good bit overlap with both of us being creatives, and I am also the first mom in my immediate friend group. Being able to listen to your journey in motherhood and see you grow has really helped me to wrap my head around the changes happening in my life and also be able to understand the road ahead. I relate to so much of this post right now and am realizing that you are helping me put words to things I am only just beginning to understand. Thanks again for doing what you do!
This has been 100% accurate for me too! This is the only video of its kind that I have stumbled onto so far, and I have to say that I love how raw and realistic it is. Thank you!
Thank you for sharing! I’m 32 having my first baby.. I love hearing the perspective of someone who got to be an adult for an extended period of time before considering having kids! It’s so much more relatable than watching videos of women 10 years younger having their first child! Subscribed!
This was one of the best videos you have made. The validation and relatability is on another level and articulated so well. MORE OF THESE PLEASE!!!!❤
Awwwww🥹🥹🥹❤️🫶
I really appreciate this video! Thank you for your honestly and vulnerability. Especially with the rise of social media, more and more people try to curate their feed with the perfect flawless snapshots of their family, routines, etc, and it's refreshing to see a real and not one sided representation on the parenting journey. Thank you for breaking the stigma and sending lots of love to your beautiful family ❤
Thank you for this video! I am 37 weeks pregnant with my 5th child, and of course I love being a mom. But sometimes you need to be able to just be you without the label or the baggage that comes with being a parent. A little break that is beneficial to both you and your child. It can be hard and still be great. It doesn’t have to be either/or and you’re not a bad mom for recognizing that
I actually feel like the opposite is true - parents are constantly talking about how hard it is to have kids. Never sleeping again, no time to yourself, ruining your relationship...this messaging is all over the place.
Couldn’t agree more. People are taking this approach to be “real”. And of course there are difficult parts about being a mother but a video like this and hammering home this message really does a disservice to motherhood
This was really insightful and interesting. I totally agree with everything you said! I love having my sweet little girl, but it is a lot. Things have gotten so so much easier since she’s been down to one nap and better at entertaining herself for long periods of time, though. It definitely helps having such a supportive husband too!
Lucie I LOVE the straightforward way you communicate, I've been following for years, but now that I'm about to have my first baby, you have no idea how grateful if makes me feel to have such good, relatable and clear content available about your journey as a mom. Thank you for sharing ♥
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Wow, this guide is such a great idea, Lucie! Thank you so much for sharing your experience! It is true that nobody tell about this thing in details. Just "motherhood is hard" is telling you nothing.
I love and respect your honesty so much, Lucy. You have taught me so much about life. You are the best older sis I never had! I am nowhere close to having kids anytime soon but your videos are really life changing and help me feel so prepared for when that day comes. I feel so lucky to grow in a world of internet and access to sound advice like this. Thank you so much for what you do
Wow thank you so much!!! I really appreciate you ❤❤❤
Thank you for making this video! Everything you said is so honest and relatable. I’m also a first time Mom of a 2.5 year old, and I completely agree with every point you made 👏. If I were to add #14 it would be realizing how little this country is set up to help parents (especially Mothers) when it comes to having a family (healthcare, Maternity leave, affordable childcare etc). Its something you dont ever think about until you’re already going through it.
The first 10 days postpartum were the most intense days of my life!! I was so lucky to have my mom here helping us and I remember crying so many times to her that I couldn’t imagine I would ever get to a day where I felt like it would be ok for her to leave. The hormones postpartum are next level.
NEXT LEVEL - very very unexpected for me!
This. I had my first born in february 2022 and he was in the nicu for his first 22 days of life because he had a serious condition with his liver and bile ducts (not a preemie). There was a lot of unknow with his condition + being a first time mom + postpartum and hormones + another hospitalization at 2 months. My dad would be our literal taxi morning and night at the hospital. My mom would do grocery and lunch for us to bring to the hospital. She was also the best listener and she was trying to help me see the light in all of this darkness. She came with me at the hospital during my son 2nd hospitalization because my SO had to go back to work. My family also did a big house clean up for when we brought back baby home. Honestly, I don't know if I would be here today without them and fortunetaly our son is now healthy.
I plan on having children in the future and sometimes I'm scared of the hard times that will follow. Hearing about people experiencing the hard times and still be overall fine is encouraging. Thank you for sharing:)
Oh yesss it is overall well worth it :)
I’m having a 4 months old baby, and you are absolutely true about all points! It’s absolutely the most beautiful things I’ve done in my life, but at the same time also very difficult at times. It’s so important to be honest about it, it helps a lot for other parents to not feel so alone with these feelings/experiences!
Thanks for sharing so honestly! It sucks when people always sugarcoat things, and thank you for sharing the lows with the highs! I’ve never ever wanted to be a parent, but I am a triathlete and can sympathize w travel being harder than being at home - all the gear, finding a pool or lake, taking care of a bicycle 😂which is not even a living thing!! Also I tried out a year of pre-med as a post-bacc and I felt like everyone always said stuff like “oh medicine is so worth it” but it was a rude awakening finding out about all the negatives they glossed over - so, yeah, promoting the notion of sharing hard things as you did here is 😊😊😊
Once the realisation comes that your freedom is lost and everything has a new degree of complexity…that’s when parenting hit me like a tonne of bricks. My babe just turned 1 and I still struggle with this new reality.
How do you feel about it now ? I am 37 and STILL one the fence. I'm scared I might regret it.
This is a great video! As someone waffling over whether or not to have kids, and who has never felt a calling to be a parent, this does definitely sway me towards not. Appreciate the honesty so much!
Hi Jamie. I am in the same boat, 37 years old and now or never for me. Did you stick to your decision not to ?
I never felt so heard and understood. Bang on Lucie! This video is a great tool for both the expecting and new parents. Will refer friends to it 😊
THIS IS WHAT I NEED! I'm a new time mom and so excited for this video and the guide!
Thank you so much for your transparency and sharing! I’m 33 weeks pregnant and have started to have some fears about parenthood and videos like these really help.
Can’t wait for the motherhood guide and the best things about having a baby video ❤
Omg I’m so glad! Sending love ❤❤❤
You're going to be amazing! Really prepare yourself to accept as much help as you feel comfortable with in the couple of weeks following your birth. If you have some sort of overbearing mother-in-law or something then that's a whole other scenario and boundaries are great but for the most part you really want to drink in that love and support if it's available to you. You should not be doing laundry, you shouldn't be cooking (look into freezer meal videos if you haven't started), don't be a hero out hanging clothes on the line...this is your first child and the transition for the first couple weeks should just be about bonding with baby and healing your body. Of course if you're dealing with a more minimal support structure that's a challenge but do not be afraid to make clear requests from friends. State your needs and don't feel guilty in taking help. Consider some darker colored trash bags so you don't feel at all self conscious about asking others to take out your trash. Personally I really loved the After Ease tincture by Wish Garden, people say it tastes awful but I actually loved it and was sad when I was out. I loved having padsicles and new other people who didn't want ice at all... Anyway, I'm rambling, I just know as a first-time Mom I put so much emphasis on the birth which is a big deal but your recovery is just as big. Do everything you can to give yourself time and space to come back together and emerge as the wonderful Mom you are❤
The vacation vs trip point is an excellent one - thank you!
I was super flexible with my baby. He slept when he wanted ate when he wanted. Went everywhere with me and I didn't put life on hold.
My son slept amazingly he's a very calm chill baby and now a chill kid at 5.
We had our son sleep in a mosses basket next to the bed then a cot at the end if the bad this made night feeds easy and helped me get more sleep becuase I knew I'd hear him if he woke up.
My baby bathed with me and sat on my hip while I went to the toilet. You don't get a spare min when your partner is out the house.
I'm looking forward to having my daughter even though I know no to kids are the same.
Holidays (vacations) have been the biggest adjustment for us! It’s definitely just a change of scene, sometimes harder work than normal life.
Yes yes yes! I have 5mo twins and this video makes me feel so seen. I don’t think I would have truly appreciated this video if I had watched it before they were born. I love being a mother but it can be lonely if you think you’re the only one experiencing these challenges
I am pregnant with my 1st and after 2 years of infertility treatments and 2 rounds of IVF. I feel like what it took to get here prepared me in a strange way for some of these things-- like the hormones, research, and DEFINITELY the financial cost of having a baby. I love your practical & helpful baby content and hope to see more!
I identify with everything you listed out! My baby just turned 12 months and we went on a week long RV trip with him when he was 3 months. Man was that a rude awakening to the realities of “vacationing” with a baby. I read the same article about vacations vs trips afterwards and it made me feel a little better lol. Another thing that has been hard for my husband and I are all the sicknesses from daycare. Everyone told me he’d get sick but a lot but I wasn’t prepared to also constantly get sick with him. It really is true, I think people tried to prepare my husband and I as well. It’s just that you can’t really comprehend what parenthood is really like until you’re in it!
Ugh yes the sicknesses 😭 sending you love. It’s hard but we all experience it together
Oh my gosh yes everything to this. My son is almost 4 months and all of this rings so true, even the schedules lol. Thank u Lucie for saying all of this! I got pregnant basically a year after you so it’s been awesome to watch your journey also as a NYC mom and will also be moving to the burbs next year 😂
This was so helpful and interesting. Thank you so much! I’d love to hear your take on the best things too!! :)
This was such an incredibly validating video. Thank you Lucie, I’m sitting here breastfeeding my first child who is five weeks old and spot on with all of these points.
Love these honest videos around the experience of having a baby. Would love more!
More to come!❤🎉
Honestly Lucie, you made it sound just VERY realistic! (I live at home with 2 nieces, 1 yr and 4 yr old )
As for me, a 30 yo single female, personally I swing back and forth SO HARD between the idea of accepting that I want the "good relationship" with my kid when they're older, but NEVER being okay with how it goes in the early years and knowing that it'd be a living hell for me. Are those 2 parts ever reconcilable? .. I'm at a loss 🙂
This has been very insightful, thank you ! I’d love to hear your perspective on the great things having a baby brought in your life too.
I’m currently 36 weeks pregnant so baby’s coming soon. I can’t yet speak for the rest, but completely agree with the financial impact being much higher than expected between all the things to buy for the baby but also for me as my body changed or as I’m preparing to nurse; and about the incredible load of information you need to research and absorb. I’m sure those guides you created will be very useful.
Thank you so much!! 36 weeks woooow! Sending you love and good vibes. You've got this :)
Suuuuper insightful!!!! Thank you for sharing this! ❤❤❤
This was a really good, honest video ! Would love to see the other video too of all your favorite things you mentioned.
I felt exactly the same way immediately postpartum! It was terrifying and faded in the next several weeks, but my oh my was I not expecting that.
Lucy, you have hit the nail on the head regarding so many of the things you can experience as a mom. Now, I'm the same age as your parents and my daughter's are in your age range, but I remember one " vacation" story" that I can share. We went to Disney Land one summer when the girls were like 5 and 7. They had to go to the bathroom. So I went to one of the bathrooms and the line was extremely long and it was as hot as Hades. It took quite a while till we got into the facility and now the 3 of us had to squeeze into a tiny stall and I had to help clean tushies and paper the toilet seat 3X for all of us. When we finally got back outside 45 mins. had gone by and my husband was like "what took so long"? I will not express what I said in response, but after that he never said another word when we had to go to the toilet. LOL
Hahaha😂😂
@@luciebfink Married 45 years, so he survived.
This was an awesome insight to pregnancy for me. I’m wanting to start a family very soon but I’m genuinely scared that I won’t be ready or that I’ll “miss” my old life. I know I want to be a mom but I just feel overwhelmed by what comes after birth. Like I’m not scared of pushing a baby out; I’m scared of everything after that!
I really want to show this to my husband so that he can understand my fears better
Your fears are valid! You don't really know what you are getting yourself into until you are in it, and that is a scary thought. However things can also turn out great! My daughter is 13 months old, and this transition has actually been smoother than I had anticipated. Good luck on your journey!
I have some friends who used to take their teenage/college aged babysitter on vacation with them, so they had someone to take care of the child/children while they had time to spend doing activities for themselves, go out to dinner, etc. They paid the expenses for the caregiver. It was always a great experience for the kids and the parents and the parents had a helper for group activities.
A really great way to enjoy the trip!!!❤❤
You really nailed this list 🫶🏼
I'm two weeks postpartum after an emergency c section. This video is so spot on. I think the sleep issue trumps the rest as without sleep only the bare minimum is really possible. My husband goes back to work in a few days and I can't tell if that will be easier or harder. I work from home (on leave until November) and like a schedule. I'm hoping that when it's just me and baby boy that I'll have a better idea of how to use the time and energy I do have.
Thank you so much for sharing - this is very helpful. Yes please to a pt. 2 with your favorite things! :)
Thank you for sharing Lucie🌷🤍
I enjoyed this video. As for trips or vacations and couple time, I think that’s why it’s good to have a trusted baby sitter, or family member who is available to watch a baby or toddler for a few hours or overnight maybe once month. That way a couple can go to a bed and breakfast or do a little “stay cation” somewhere nearby. Get massages together or eat out. Having a play date with another parent with a child can work too for adult conversations.
I have a 22m old (pregnant with a second one 🥵) and 1000% agree with all of the points you mentioned. I went through the exact same.
We are so on the same page when it comes to sticking to the schedule! But yeah sometime I also wonder if we are too rigid.. on the other hand, sleeps during the day will last for about 3 years only, so things will change for the better again!
This was a great video , very informative & accurate!!!👌🏽
Thank you for being realistic.... 😘 Love your channel and the honesty of the content....
Currently pregnant with my first and getting induced tomorrow morning. It’s funny that you felt that there was so much positivity about having kids or becoming parents on social media and you felt that no one told you about the hard things before having your baby. I have been terrified all week about delivering my baby this weekend because I felt the opposite! I saw so much negativity about how hard and horrible becoming a parent was that it made me question myself constantly even though I knew I wanted to be a mom my whole life too. I’ve had so many people tell me it’s going to be so hard and so terrible and all this stuff, I really was wondering if it would ever be good at all.
How has the last ten months been ?
@@Satsusss tough but amazing at the same time. I love my daughter more than anything, the joy she brings me and our family is unmatched. It’s been the toughest time too, I’ve faced challenges I didn’t expect and could never have been ready for even if I did expect them. It’s pushed me beyond my limits but my heart feels full. I’m very tired and lot of the time but I feel very fulfilled and watching my boyfriend become the amazing father I knew he would be, lights up my life in ways I also didn’t know could or would ever happen for me. It’s tough but I am so grateful for my family every day ♥️
@@jessicacruz2974 wonderful to hear this as like you all I seem to hear/see are the negatives. Thank you so much for you reply, I am thrilled for you and your lovely family.
@@Satsusss thanks so much! Yea I always saw negatives and it’s definitely challenging but I feel it’s worth it ♥️ I say if you want to feel the full spectrum of emotion in this life, become a parent. It’s the scariest, hardest, most exhausting, amazing, beautiful, exciting, fulfilling experience. I’ve never felt such a range of emotions as I have through this. It’s made me strong and wiser in many ways. Instead of hating on it, I try to grow through it 💙 If you’re looking to start a family, I wish all the love, happiness, endurance and success for you too! 💞
100% spot on!
I relate so much! Thanks for this vidéo 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Currently pregnant and I love your point of view, you explained everything really great 👍🏻 thank you for this video, definitely will be back watching it again in Post Partum to Remind myself of the things you said! 😁🥰
❤❤❤
Would love to see a video on how you prepped for birth & delivery, and baby must have products!
Please make a video about what you love about being a parent!
I had a pretty unfortunate birth with my little, 29 stitches and in a country with some pretty firm beliefs on numbing sprays and such. The sitting in the bathroom dealing with yourself while everyone is visiting and checking in, and feeling the joy, was some of the hardest for me! Many people gloss over it ❤ and the amount of google rabbit holes for literally everything... so much sensory and mental overload
Yesss x10000- wow I am sending you love. That sounds very hard.
This is super honest and helpful
A couple thoughts that came up for me in this video...
I would also put myself in the category of someone who was basically excited and prepared for motherhood, I second her emotion on all of the physical recovery stuff and would add that in my case I had really wild low blood pressure and for 6 weeks after the birth and felt like I was going to blackout anytime I stood up or randomly while I was walking. I'm not sure how to explain how it feels to be responsible for a newborn you have to carry and simultaneously not know when you're going to possibly black out. Definitely a challenge I did not anticipate. I was very grateful when it resolved after 6 weeks.
There's so much I could say but a second thought that came up randomly was the one year doctor checkup for baby.... For me it was a bit of a transition to accept the frequency of doctor visits for my newborn just because it was something sort of new in my life and right around the 12-month mark you start to feel comfortable with the fact that you're there all the time and someone is having little chats with you and taking down statistics and it sort of becomes part of your world and then suddenly you go to the one year visit and they look at you with a big smile and say, all right we'll see you in a year...what? I mean you can choose to go back anytime you want and some people opt for an 18-month visit but where we live they go straight from the one year visit to the two-year visit which honestly feels like being thrown into a chasm in some ways. I can't complain because I was blessed with a healthy child and that's a great thing... I'm just speaking to the emotional shift of coming to accept these frequent check-ins in your life and suddenly realizing that that's not a thing for a whole year... It's a very strange sensation
That is sooo true about the doctor. They just stop seeing you 😮
I tried to do the overly schedule thing, but I found it created too much anxiety so now I go with the flow. I follow my babies lead , but if a schedule works for then that's great! My parents are great with boundaries, but my husband's parents are awful.
I'm sorry to hear about the boundaries - that's gotta be very hard!!! Sending you love! Also so happy you found what works for you schedule-wise!
Please make a favourite things one !! I need it now haha x
Yes please create video of positives of Motherhood ❤
I’m roughly 3 weeks from my first’s due date. I have been even keeled emotionally during this pregnancy and admittedly thought I could be exempt from anything intense postpartum 😅 This was a great reality check video and I am going to ask my partner to watch this too. We’re talking about how we are going to game plan keeping our relationship stable during the absolute chaos of birth and childcare. It’s encouraging to hear your perspective and others in the comments!
❤️❤️❤️🥹 you’ve got this!!
I took “learn as you go” approach. As long as my baby is fed, changed, sleeps through the night, I’m good. I have NICU baby so feeding has been the toughest part. She is 10 months old.
Thank you for sharing. As a first time mum to a beautiful 6 month old girl the thing I have struggled with the most is the lack of sleep. I've learnt it's very much down to their temperament and it's the reality of parenthood but would you be open to sharing a list of sleeping hacks, tips or your approach? Thank you
If you have more children, what will you do if they are fighting?
The financial impact is what you make of it. Nobody has to buy a stroller for $2000 and cribs for $3000.
Yes!! Our crib was very affordable and actually converts from mini to full sized to toddler bed so it's 3 in 1! Amazing value :)
Thank you for this video
Lucy! What music have you been listening to / loving lately? 💜💛❤️ I’ve been loving Kesha’s new album. Currently been loving - all I need is you, too far gone and fine line.
The scheduling can be tough or the early mornings to get in a workout before your partner goes to work 🫠 one trick I would do if I needed a shower and bubs was awake is I would put him in his cot with some of his favorite books and small toys and watched him on the monitor, or put him in a highchair in the room and a highchair toy. At night with my second, I was able to turn off the sound on the monitor and just check on them if they cried, I defiantly wasn’t able to do this with my first though😅
I love this. ❤
I Had the same thought. I Had the perfect pregnancy and birth, and I still Had ppa and ppd. I can't imagine how bad it is in less Ideal situations. Our relationship also suffered some in the First 6months. But I have to Say, nothing of all this surprised me. I knew It all was a possibility.
Can relate to this SO much! 3 weeks post partum
I think people just say 'it's really hard'. But u can't understand Why / How it is so hard until you're in it 🙃🙂 Many of these things really resonated with me as a mum of a 11 month old, I think u did a really good job of clearly outlining and explaining the challenges. But I wonder if I would have felt the same if I wasnt a new mum myself 🤔
I misread the video title as 'the 13 happiest things about having a baby' 😆
Omg 💯 agreed!!!
I am so lucky that we live close to my parent so they can watch the baby
In the thick of it and this is 100% true
The weight! Thank you for verbalizing that
You're very lucky to have mature inlaws and parents.
I try to tell my close friend gently (who is pregnant now) that some parts of postbirth might be difficult... unfortunately she is in that mode of "we are different" and that her husband is different...when he and she have literally done less than average for the last 5 years
Some babies thrive on a schedule, some don’t. Where parents (and babies) suffer is when parents try to force it one way or another!
love the inclusive language! Thank you for being so open sharing your personal experience
I finally got that ability to deep sleep back until my daughter was about 15 months 🎉
Watching while is labor
You’ve got this😂😂😂
My baby is not on any schedule and she sleeps through every night for 12h, so every baby is different…
100% and every fam needs something different re: scheduling!!
How old is your baby and how do they sleep for 12hrs? You just let them and not wake them up? I don't mean to be rude just curious as I am interested in doing this with my baby so if there's a trick to it. I want to know 😅
Share your favorites too ❤
No no no don't take the thing for granted, that the second time around you forget how hard it is. In my experience, babies are muuuuch easier than an opinionated five year old. Believe me. Read all the books, consulted all the therapists, nothing unaverage. Just normal Kid madness.
Hi, I can't have kids and I watched this as my good friend just had a baby and I want to understand better.
Um, I did want to say the Huffington Post's "vacation/trip" idea is very elitist. I have had and will have many wonderful vacations that involved driving and cooking.
Traveling with small children does sound very hard, but I imagine taking a little bit older kids places could be very magical.
Yesss I'm very excited for vacations with older kids!!
Damn. If it’s been this hard for Lucie (read: extremely affluent - for those who don’t know her uncle is the Larry Fink, American billionaire businessman - has access to all the resources necessary for raising a kid, both parents/families seemingly help out a ton plus a nanny, etc.) then there’s no hope for the rest of us… 😢
oh shit thank you for this info. SO relevant.
@@kacitobin7723 perspective 😉😘
Thank you so much for this comment but I have no relation to Larry Fink lol!!!
Yes but she had luxuries she left out of the video too. Like she mentioned lack of sleep in the early days and having to take care of a baby immediately postpartum , but I remember her saying previously that she had a nurse there 24/7 initially.
@@nayebayeyes, we had a baby nurse helping for the first few weeks, as people in most other countries have! My privilege is definitely not lost on me! However, I am not related to this billionaire she speaks of😅
WARNING FOR SENSITIVE
DO NOT WATCH
I watched the first few minutes, but if you are currently pregnant like I am, you do not need to hear this. Unnecessary to add the negatives to think about, sets you in bad mindset.
We will already be for sure going through this, we all expect it's going to be rough. But for me... I wanted to prepare for birth and not think about the latter.. the dark hole you sucked me into with your postpartum, I will take it one step at a time istead of now being crushed what terrible things are maybe going to happen to me... warn people first😔
Then maybe don’t watch a video titled the 13 hardest things about having a baby 😂
@@lilly8803 you're right. I just thought I could get some tips from this video, but it went elswhere then I expected, so I just added warning because I would appreciate it myself🤷♀️
Did you read the girlfriends guide to pregnancy? That book is pretty real and does not sugarcoat it.
I didn’t! Will have to next time around
Read the girlfriends guide to toddlers!
Tooo much like Alien 4me.
Not everyone has this experience post partum. Just saying.
I hope people don't have this experience lol it was not fun! But for those who do...just want them to know they're not alone 💕