Why Ghosters Always Come Back?
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- čas přidán 27. 06. 2024
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00:00 Intro
00:24 True?
00:39 Definition
01:01 STOP Blaming Yourself
02:45 Ghosting Is Immature
03:23 Reason Why People Ghost
06:31 Why Ghosters Come Back
09:27 How To React
Ghosting is the last cowardly thing a coward will do.
My girl ghosted me and after over a week, she called me. I did not pick up. She texted me : hi. I did not respond. She didn't apologize or nothing. I can't take her back cuz she's not who I thought she was.
Nothing more important than self-respect, KING. If you take her back, you're just training her to treat you like shit. No need to be with a toxic girl like that.
lack of accountability on her part. She expects you to simp.
I support your decision. I had been with many ghosters. They don't want commit on relationship.
Was she virgin girl
@@n.m.3760You're so very lucky. She did you a favor good luck.
"People can be afraid of hurting you" do they actually think this while hurting you anyway? it's so dumb. They're a bunch of cowards. That's all they are.
You're right, I haven't thought about this they are afraid to hurt you anyway they do ....
@@Kat144- Exactly. They are just immature people, I can understand if the ghostee is a threat to their lives, but most of these ghosting situations are always online, it’s so easy so say, I like you, I don’t love you or feel the same way about you, can we take a break? Or just say something. Ppl are cowards and they only care about their feelings. 🤷🏻♂️
Better shut the door permanently to ghosters who come back..They are bound to ghost again
No, they don't always come back. If they feel rejected or denied their supply they will often permanently discard to protect their ego and avoid uncomfortable conversations.
Exactly. My ghoster never come back because of his ego. That's i know for sure.😂
I agree with you. Sometimes they don't. And most of the time it's better for us.
@@luudan3358I had every ghoster come back. I never asked them why or tried to reach out. Although it bothered me I didn’t respond to it. Every single time they came back with some lame excuse.
My wife of 20+ years and 2 sons later is ghosting me. I'm done with cowardly behavior. I'm 65 and I probably don't have a lot of life left.
65 Is not old!!!! I’m sure you do have a lot of life left! I wish you all the best!
Never give someone that ghosts you another chance. Especially if you have been in any type of relationship with them. They are only coming back to serve their own needs and use you. It's a Prelude of what's to come, if you keep taking this person back. Who wants to be with someone that cannot communicate and behaves in such a disrespectful manner?❤
What this video doesn't preface is that the ghoster is someone whom you were in a relationship with. Or at least someone whom the relationship has already taken off and things are about to get to the next serious level, then they just ghost you. These people have commitment phobia and even if they get into a long-term relationship it always go sour. If they actually get married, it will be done in a hasty way and end in divorce after a short while anyways.
Ghosting is the worst thing you can do to someone like you meant nothing ever. It makes you feel desperate and stupid.
Exactly! Was hard to not send multiple desperate texts or call,texted an article about texting and that was my last contact.
Not all the time
I’m concluding my ghoster is just a jerk and liar and not the guy I thought he was. We talked about personal things and supposedly he had a tough past. That is something to explain and say what is going on with him. He ghosted, came back for a few days, ghosted for 2 weeks and returned like it was yesterday. When I replied I didn’t get a decently timed reply so I know he’s full of $%#. Coming back with no explanation is disgusting and he knows what he is doing.
Don't give any chance to ghosters. They're manipulative and they don't care about our mental health. Take care for yourself is important. Ignore ghosters. They come back for looking something that can be useful for them only.
Right off the bat, I have to disagree. Looking into the reason why the ghoster ghosts helped me a lot because it taught me that it has nothing to do with me, and everything to do with them not knowing how to confront difficult situations where they have to express themselves. It takes the blame off of me so I can stop feeling like I did something wrong.
And they'll never tell you bc they want you to think something is wrong only with you.
I agree with you. Ghosting is a sign of being not mature enough to have an open conversation in the first place.
He said, "I've been busy working"
Sure.
I responded back. "I'm busy too, very busy, so busy, getting busy, getting busier by the minute, too busy ✌️"
The sweet excuse let them keep it busy busy busy.
The ghosted I know ( or thought I knew). She is immature, nefarious, needs help ( but doesn’t). Shame on her!
Once they knew that i knew.. i got ghosted. It took me a week to accept i was being ghosted.. and then the shame of lowering my standards to begin with had blown up in my face. Im not really even mad at them, im pissed at myself.
Yhank You Great Sincere Information !
It's not easy. Thank You
Thanks Bijan ❤
man thank you for this video, it really helped me to get over this s*it, but i feel like the reason was that i am available at all times, i will try to limit that and give the person a second chance, im actually 15 so i pretty much accept the immaturity in that person, also if that will not work i will break contact because it would have no sense that i even try. its hard but i will have to get over it. thank you
Its the same as bullies: They dont realise the damage they do by being cowards. Generally it doesnt bother me if I havent got to the point of actually meeting for real but when it has gotten to that point you owe it to them to give them an honest explanation imo.
We had a close couples relationship with another couple. They ghosted us and it hurt terribly. After a year they called us up and wanted to be friends again. I said “No, because you can’t be trusted!” Now they’re horribly nasty to us when we run into them in our small town. It’s sort of unnerving. I don’t understand their reasoning.
It's better not to answer and have conversation but ignore silent
They can never come back and they can't apologize. Because it's too late and that's why it's great to block.
They don't get the choice to ghost me. And then I think they're gonna come back and say something jokes on them.
You Speak with Excellent Sense and Thought ?
I derive great enjoyment out of ghosting the ghosters🤡🤡. I’ll make them feel good about themselves and then get my revenge by leaving the conversation hanging.
Man. Great video. My ghosting has my head spinning.. in my case it involves a long distance relationship. I've been talking to this girl for a few years now. Shes come to visit me 2 times now. We had an amazing time both times. Last time she was here she told me she didn't want to leave. Then she gets home and ghosts me completely. Stopped replying to texts. Then after a month I start talking to her again. I try to maintain contact with her , but I'm lucky if I hear back from her and if I do I'll get her attention for about 5 minutes and she stops responding. Then we'll make plans to facetime. I'm ready at the designated day and time and then nothing. She blows me off. I spoke to her last month, she apologized saying she's just been very busy at work and very stressed out, but then said that she wants to come visit me again. I bought her a plane ticket for the end of June and I've barely heard from her since I sent her the screenshot of her flight info. I just don't know what to do anymore
Thanks for your honest comment. I highly appreciate it. I would make my boundaries clear and tell her, that she overstepped my boundaries with breaking contact. And I would tell her, if she does it again, I will break contact once and for all.
I think is seems best to protect yourself and cut contact completely. Sometimes it's hard to let go but the right choice. You have to learn to show your boundaries. (For ex. you are done after the second time cutting you off). There are always 2 people involved and they usually 50%/50% responsible for such a situation. One person ghosts and the other person allows being ghosted. So, after it happened several times, you can make sure you cut contact, and with so don't let it happen to you again.
My sibling ghosted me unexpectedly. Learned they are jealous, deep down want to hurt me and deny their nasty behavior. My previous predictable behavior whenever she treated me horribly was to try harder and do more things for her, I stopped that behavior, accepted she will not change. Is it worth fighting for this person, no, they are not who you think they are and it is too draining and unhealthy. Did Approach her in person saying are you angry and her response was I'm not going to talk about it. She is just very angry person, and will not talk about and address difficult relationship issues, and in denial of her mental illness also.
I hooked up with a guy, everything went well and he kept talking to me after it but then he told me he wasn’t ready for a relationship since he hasn’t moved on from his ex so he will take sometime to heal and maybe later we can try again. I was a little hurt and idk if it’s true but I respect it. I won’t reach out nor say anything since it’s not my job. If he comes back and wants something serious he has to work, I won’t move a finger. I definitely not need his validation. Whatever his issues are, he has to solve them himself. Thanks for the video
Thanks for sharing! ❤
At least he didn’t ghost you.. Whether his reasons were true or not, I will give him credit for treating you with kindness, showing you respect and sparing your feelings.. It is unfair to compare him with ghosters
@@RoseOfSaudia well we didn’t talk for months until he reached out again and then again no responding but honestly I’m not paying attention to negative things. I don’t like having bad assumptions about people. The more you focus on it, the more of that you get.
When a guy says not interested in a relationship., walk away, don't waste any more if your precious time with a loser. If you keep trying, it shows you have no self respect and it is an inevitable spiral downward
Someone who says that is worth moving on from and ghosting
At least he explained himself and his situation before he left. He really should have told you that before he hooked up with you but, he probably wanted the sex and kept silent about his true intentions and the fact that he didn't want a relationship. Sorry this happened to you, you deserve better.
I have a few questions concerning the ghosting due to life circumstances. On one hand I feel guilty for cutting him off but on the other hand I don't want to feel like just an emotional support human
I think it is ok to cut contact, as soon as you explained yourself and the other side knows why you cut contact.
Are they being emotionally manipulative? Maybe you can't be emotionally available...? A lot of times we're not looking to drain people! This person probably isn't expecting much from you ...that's why communication is key!! Explain how you feel and set boundaries ....be honest about what makes you uncomfortable.... If this person needed emotionally support don't just ghost without explaining. We all need emotional support whether we admit or not. Just bc you don't see your other relationships with people as emotional support....that's indeed what it is! This person probably just needs a friend. This means you're a good person if they are confiding in you. Just tell them they can be overwhelming. Maybe they will ease up. Tell them what you need from the relationship. We don't have to always treat these ppl as scary or bad people. The fact you care means you're confused about the situation.
A girl i was talking to for 6 weeks told me she is 4 years older than me ( i was a little shocked and i think she felt it😂) a day later she ghosted me ....inmature behavior don't need that kind of person in my life !
So sorry to hear that!
@@coachingonlineorg all Good. 😁👍
Its been nearly a year since she ghosted me. Haven't heard from her. I don't think she's coming back 😮
Hi my dear. Sometimes they don't. But then you know they are not the right person for you.
It's how you know you are lucky 🎉
Do they come back tho? 🤔
What do you guys think. I had a new manager last year. He was separated from his wife ( very ugly separation, not divorced, yet). He got a new girlfriend, they used to work together when he was still married. So anyway he started a new job where i happened to work. Felt for me ( he was trying not show bc he was my boss) but I sensed it. When he saw me very first time, I will never forget the way he looked at me. He had this puzzled looked, like he saw a ghost. Staring at me. It almost looked like it was love at the first sight for him. t least that kind of look you see in movies. I never forget this looked. I was puzzled too. He was trying to hide his feelings. I have to give him respect. We had work related relationship. He was my boss. He never crossed that line. He was afraid of his feelings. I could tell. But then 7 months later he suddenly quits this job. It did not worked out for him, problems with his own bosses. I was not aware at all ( I am a small person at this company and have no idea what is going on behind closed doors at my bosses’ offices ) that he was leaving and putted his 2 weeks. He saw me at work at his very last day ( I was not aware it was his last day either ). He did not say a word that he was leaving. He acted like it was his normal day. Even though he has opportunity to say something to me on his last day. We saw each other all day long. He even saw me 10Min before my shift was over in the hallway. Just walked by me without any emotions. Cold and stoic. That was it. It kind of hurt my feelings. We had no problems with one another. Just casual, work related conversations. Just both being professional. He always controlled himself around me. I felt it was very hard for him at times. I thought he could at least thank me for working with him bc he was my boss after all. But he just left abruptly like I was not even excited. That cold, stoic look all I remember in that hallway. Like he never knew me. When he walked by. Has been 6 months. Never heard from him. I am trying to figure out what was it all about? Can anyone help me with this? Thank you
Sounds like it was all in your head- all this from a look??????
What do you mean from a look? My look?
He lost credibility when he said "always" in the title.
Ghosting is sucks
When they ghost they already won. Sadly. They love it!
I'm a serial ghoster. I know it's fucked. I've been hurt a lot and 90% of the time feelings got involved and I really care, so I leave. I don't wanna be hurt again so I leave. It's selfish. It's fucked. I know that. I've been better about it lately and finally had one person I really try for cut it off randomly. It hurts a lot. Tbh I also now feel like it's kinder than saying bye. The immediate hurt hurts a lot. Ghosting feels better. I'd rather he just ghost me than say bye. I hope he finds someone to make him happier than I ever could.
And a proud one as well. It's worst than a serial killer.please get this so called innocent habit of yours away so that u can do good to society. You are honest in ur opinion but not honest emotionally, be the real you. face your fears live your dream. Good luck. T'care
@@khalidmobarak4382 👍👍
are you diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder?
Get therapy.
Better for who? I ve been hurt many ways till Sunday amd someone just not responding feels much worse with the exception of cheating with a side of narcissistic post breadcrumbing. It feels also like that person didn't even value enough to tell you the truth or not treat you like a telemarker via text
I'm 65 and all of a sudden I got all these friend requests from pretty girls in their 20's and 30's. Now I've been alone since I was 27. For some reason I've always attracted beautiful sexy women who are screwed in the head. So I fell for this one gal even tho fb warned me about people I don't know. This chick totally drained me emotionally and passed me off. Was she even real person? I found a video from a " ghosting " expert. He said these girls have been traumatized in their youth and can't emotionally be real. They need therapy badly. This chick said she loved me and was going to spend the rest of her life with me etc. After 3 draining nights the hit for money came. Aha! The funny thing is the photo of her in a bathing suit I swear I saw it somewhere decades ago. Another young pretty girl is dead according to the net or else she's 53. So all you older lonely guys be very careful. Guard your hearts. Let God bring someone to you or be like me and learn to be happy alone which I am. Females love to tease, play games for attention to make themselves pretend they have self-esteem which they don't. It's cheaper to pay for it because you can never buy a good women's love. Read Proverbs chapter 39.
Return to therapy
Ghosters don’t always come back! You are giving people hope that doesn’t exist. The real question is if your ghosted especially in a long term relationship why do you want them back? They’ve shown you who they really are. No one deserves to be treated that way especially if you were living together and one day they just never show up. They even leave all their clothes toiletries etc so they never give you a clue they are deserting you and don’t want you in their life!
😢 These people are cowards and can’t deal with facing the truth that 1) they’ve been in a relationship with someone else at the same time and don’t want you to know they were cheating on you, or they pretend to have to go on a business trip leave all their stuff at your house and never come back. They are weak and emotionally stunted so instead of being honest they block your phone number so you are left emotionally scared and they just move on to their next lover, job or whatever else they had already lined up but don’t ever let you in on their secret 🤫 Be grateful they finally showed you who they really are and dont waste any more of your precious life on them. 🙏 😢Seek counseling or whatever type of support you need. You may be scared for life so take care of your emotional needs and remember this is about them not you 😢
Wrong. If I ghost you it’s because I got tired of the bare minimum effort and carrying the entire conversation. And if I ghost some one I will literally never even think about them a single time ever again.
you should at least give them an explanation before cutting communication !!!! and before that you should communicate that you are tired of carrying out the conversation and then look at their effort. you talk like a sociopath without empathy !!! You are incapable of communication and that's what ghosters are...
You sound a little dysfunctional.
I feel like that’s a good reason to ghost
In that situation is not ghosting, it's permanent 0 contact rule.
U could still communicate?
There are two main reasons for ghosting: 1) how do you look 2) what you can offer. If you’re outside of the green area of a person, then he/she wants to break up the contact with you…mostly in a cunning manner…without burning the bridges behind his/her own back. Who knows, maybe you can get better at expense of someone else. That’s why: ghosting.
If you’ve improved your looks and/or become able to bring much more to the table, then and only then the ghoster comes back.
I’m not a psychologist, but a salesman, who changed the third country to live.
Lol bro u are delusional. Even brad pit can get ghosted.. its a ghosters mental illness and upbringing. Putting it on looks would be lowering ur own self esteem and absolutely not a fixable matter u cant change ur looks and ur genetics.
We sometimes ghost when the other person did not grasp our body language that also communicates, for instance I am not interested. But the other obviously cant read it. I dont feel bad at all if someone ignores my body language and mimics over a long time
Why not be the adult and just tell the other person. Lol common sense huh
@@DG38594 lol because not everyone can speak, their voice was taken in childhood already, but many wont understand that. I could ask you why do you ignore or cant read body language? As an adult! Same thing
@@DG38594 and sometimes we just dont want to hurt people with the truth. Words can be harsh
@jilross4892 LOL I just say what's on my mind. Better than taking the just disappear immature route. Be an ADULT
Maybe if you actually used your voice then the other person would actually be able to understand what you’re telling them. Body language isn’t communication, talking is!
My ex bf just did 👻 for a week now and i may want him to explain his side but at the back of my head, this guy is crazy and i fed up on him. 😂Bye bye should be the endings. I just wish him well 💪🫰🏻
when u get ghosted take that persons number out of your phone.dont look back.if that person contacts u say hello who am i speaking with.watch the response they give backfirst u will hear silence then u will hear u dont remember me or somthing like that and notice the shock they have by u not knowing who it was that called u.
Like it
thats a good idea
Very good insight. I was ghosted after 1 date. The thing that is perplexing is that we spend a long time during the contact and we got along very well. I was thinking it was a good connection. Well, the next day I sent her a short text asking how her day is, no response. I waited 5 hours then texted "are you ok" no response. So 4 hours later called her went to VM, did not leave any message. It has been 4 days since the contact and she actually made plans with me for this Saturday to meet. I have not contacted her since that day she did not respond. Any suggestions or should I just drop her.
Hi. Sometimes people are not good at telling us, that we aren't the right fit. That the chemistry wasn't there for them. Instead of being honest, they ghost. The best thing you can do is try not to take it personally and move on. All the best for you. The right fit will come, don't stop searching...
Thank you for responding to me. This is great feedback and I appreciate you taking the time to send this to me. You are a very kind soul.@@coachingonlineorg
@ngonlineorg Just wanted to give you an update. I had promised to meet her that following Saturday despite not hearing from her. I texted her saying I'm a man of my word and the meeting would be at the time and place. I then that meeting day went to the meeting place. She no showed no called waited 7 minutes then left. I did not contact her at all. I have since took her number out of my phone and will not darken her doorstep again. Looking at it in hindsight, I might have dodged a bullet & saved my self some future problems. Thank you for the confidence.
@@Irishlen64well done that you didn't put up with this nonsense. I wish my date had been a man of his word. He just completely vanished from the face of the earth a day before we were meant to meet up in person. This was after 2 weeks of solid regular intense contact - hours of phone and messaging. Why? 🤯
@@blossom6473 I'm really sorry this happened to you but then again like I eventually found out, I really dodged a bullet. Maybe you dodged one as well. There is a myriad of theories he did this, but the bottom line, this person is not worth your time & it is a blessing you found out before you became entangled with this POS.