Stop Saying Things That Make You Weak | Jordan Peterson | Powerful Life Advice
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- čas přidán 10. 12. 2019
- "You're not doing this in order to put yourself down. You're doing this in order to separate the wheat from the chaff, and to leave everything that you don't have to be behind."
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➤➤Speaker:
Jordan Peterson
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Powerful Life Advice | Powerful Wisdom | Best Life Advice
Transcript (partial):
I started to pay very careful attention to what I was saying. I don’t know if that happened voluntarily or involuntarily, but I could feel a sort of split developing in my psyche. I’ve actually had students tell me that the same thing has happened to them after they’ve listened to some of the material that I’ve been describing to all of you. But I split into two, let’s say.
One part was the old me that was talking a lot, that liked to argue, and that liked ideas. There was another part that was watching that part, just with its eyes opened, and neutrally judging. The part that was neutrally judging was watching the part that was talking, and going, that wasn’t your idea; you don’t really believe that; you don’t really know what you’re talking about; that isn’t true. I thought, hm! That’s really interesting! That was happening to like 95 percent of what I was saying, and then I didn’t really know what to do. I thought, ok, this is strange. Maybe I fragmented, and that’s just not a good thing, at all. It’s not like I was hearing voices, or anything like that.
So then I had this weird conundrum: which of these two things are me? Is it the part that’s listening and saying, no, that’s rubbish; that’s a lie; you’re doing that to impress people; you’re just trying to win the argument. Was that me? Or was I the part that was going about its normal, verbal business? I didn’t know, but I decided that I would go with the critic. And then what I tried to do-what I learned to do, I think-was to stop saying things that made me weak. I mean, I’m still trying to do that. I’m always feeling, when I talk, whether or not the words that I am saying are making me align or making me come apart. I really do think that the alignment is the right way to conceptualize it, because if you say things as true as you can say them, then they come out of the depths inside of you. We don’t know where thoughts come from. We don’t know how far down into your substructure the thoughts emerge. We don’t know what process of physiological alignment is necessary for you to speak from the core of your being. We don’t understand any of that-we don’t even conceptualize that. But I believe that you can feel that.
It’s a shock. You might think, well, do you really want all of that to burn off? Well, there’s nothing left but a little husk-5 percent of you. Well, if that 5 percent is solid, then maybe that’s exactly what you want to have happen.
It’s not self-destructive, because it’s like the diagnosis of an illness. It’s like, if that does happen to be the case for you, to some degree-maybe it’s only 10 percent of you, or maybe it’s 90 percent-well, then coming to terms with that is excellent, because, maybe, you can stop doing it. What would be the downside to that? You’d have to give up your resentment, hatred, and all of that, obviously. That’s annoying, because those emotions are easy to engage in, and they’re engaging, and they have a feeling of self-righteousness with them. But you’re not doing this to put yourself down: you’re doing this to separate the wheat from the chaff and to leave everything that you don’t have to be, behind.
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About 13 years ago I wondered what I would sound like if I said nothing negative about anyone, any thing, any event... and I soon had nothing to say! How awful must I have been before that! More recent years have seen me try and say less negative stuff about my own self and it does feel better.
WHOW
I also tried the mantra:say something nice or stay silent. And same as you i stod silent a lot. Now i have to face the conversation in my head, stop saying negative things about and to me. Really really weird.
MindBox , hmm psychobabble, Consider the prophet Isaiah. And the realization of God incarnate, referenced by Matthew, if you need help, ask.
Peace
That's not exactly what Jordan is talking about. He's pointing out how one should tell apart the voice that comes from our "monkey mind" (or "racing thoughts") from to the voice that comes out of the depths of our real soul. It's not a difference between negative and positive -- but between what's fake and what's authentic.
I did the opposite to become more useful. Positivity in overdrive made me ignorant of the shadow in myself and others. I became meek, lacking ambition and making excuses for others. These things must be balanced and used constructively. Both have potential to destroy.
That's the beauty of personal development, even though you level up, the levels to surmount are endless.
that's how capitalism makes you think of the self, an ever improving, efficient product.
Alan Watts may disagree and say that all the levels you perceive to surmount to are just the same level. Ego-cyclical
@@rymichael7203 Alan Watts is awesome to listen to :)
havadatequila capitalism can result in monopolies which stifle opportunity and improvement (climate science deniers et al) Free enterprise and trade liberalism is what leads to high achievement. Capitalism only means that trade and industry are in private hands pursuing profit. Without free markets, operating under accountable laws Capitalism can lead to oligarchy and fascism.
👏👏👏
Peterson certainly has a knack for taking away people's pacifiers. No wonder so many people hate him.
Especially the left
@@tmnt10000 The left doesnt hate him. Stop spreading that political propaganda.
@@Mavish11
Right and I not white.
@@Mavish11
I stop when the left stops with their intolerance and political propaganda.
@@tmnt10000 Eye an for an eye makes the whole world blind. I dont know what propaganda you're talking about but you should stay away from Facebook. And try not to stupe to the same level as leftist extremist.
“Trouble is more interesting than boring” I saw many “friends” I used to associate with create trouble/problems for other people to make their own lives interesting. Sad really.
I see this in a lot of my friends right now. They do stupid things because they have nothing else to do. It’s even worse now bc of quarantine. Prof Peterson is definitely an eye opener.
Well, I guess I'm weird...I'll take boring over trouble any day, having had my fill of trouble---mine and other people's. Boring is when you're free to find or make something constructive or otherwise fun to do, if you so choose.
Exactly my point.
@Joost Broek Haha and I'm pretty much older than dirt! 😄
@@helenhighwater5313 ,PS..I'm older than dirt too.😃
ASHWAJEET
Sooo nothing changed?
rye, if you think Jordan Peterson videos are useless, why are you here?
Aye. Still watching useless stuff. He has good points. Better to use this as motivation, stop using youtube and actually do something.
@rye How can you dismiss them if you cannot comprehend them? One can explain it to you, but *NO ONE* can understand it for you.
time to get to gym bro
And people want to silence this genius
No. I've been listening ears open and eyes open and mind open. Hopefully this trend will spread. Science help us!
Because he encourages self-responsibility and independence. Two things the Left hates
@@maggiemcgee8487 -- You precisely nailed it.
"Thought and Truth are revolutionary acts". 1984.
Did he make a genius statement here? What was it?
I experience this too. Every time I talk, I can feel myself watching and listening to what I'm saying. Most of the time I'm telling me to stop talking.
And it is a hard feeling to accept too
I need to shut up when i tell me to shut up!!
Me too
So is jbp telling u to listen to the critic instead of babbling things that u know to be false?
@@Dev-ri7zf yes.If you feel weak because of things you say and you feel weak during saying them you should stop saying them.Filter out nonsense and say things that you really mean.
Battle for the mind because everything begins in your thoughts.
That's the hardest part!
A bouncer once told me we need a bouncer for our minds unwanted and negative thoughts can be told your not coming in helped me a lot.
Invest in your thoughts for everything it's created twice, first as an idea.
Bruce Lee said "To be honest with one's self is a difficult thing to do." If you get rid of what is not you, you can then become who you were always meant to be. It is always nice to hear these concepts put into different words, hopefully in a way that can really sink in. You just started yourself on a whole new journey Mr. Peterson, it is one worth taking. Best wishes.
"Leave everything you don't have to be behind."
Excellent advice. This man is a marvel in that he can make the mysterious utterly obvious, and bring the profound within easy reach.
**Profoundly disturbing ad hoc for self awareness**.. It's like your conscience talking lol
We can all be a "marvel" if willing to put Pride aside.
Chris Anderson
*liked*
The pride of life; mankind's absolute defeat. History shows entire civilizations wipe out predicated on that very conundrum.
Excellent advice? What about it was excellent?
@@psychcowboy1 your reply.
"It's a hell of a shock to realize you're mostly dead wood." And yet, we probably recognize this fact in others very easily. You have a friend, and you know exactly how she'll react to ANYTHING you tell her? You know someone who always relates every story back to themselves, or their military service, or some celebrity they once knew? We think of those people as simple and repetitive, but we think each pronouncement from our own lips is utterly fascinating. We can't all be right.
How daaaaaaaa you I have nevaaaaa been wrong!!!!
I think that a lot of times when people reply with a story about themselves, they're just trying to show that they relate to what you're saying, that they understand.
@@edennis8578 Yeah, that's understandable, but when you are talking about your ectopic pregnancy and he comes back with the same story about how he ate 40 hot wings to win a bet, you know he just doesn't have that much to say. I'm afraid we are all that way sometimes, though.
My dad was one of those silent types. Not to the point that he couldn't socialise, but I remember when people were talking he just sat back and listened until he just straight out said over the table to no specific person. "How the fuck do you have an opinion about everything?!"
It was kinda fun, because everyone at the table looked like they started to think hard af before making statements after that not to mention the discussion actually started to go somewhere.
That's what think about Tim Pool these days. He's tedious to listen to because he tries to make any story he hears about him in some way.
We have to be careful of what we are saying, because we create our reality.
Danko Nešović ... we certainly do.
Then you are using a very loose and incorrect definition of reality.
Reality is based on truth and facts. It is there and doesn’t change based on someone’s thoughts or feelings regarding it. It exists whether you believe it does or not. You cannot create any reality that doesn’t already exist unless it is a false one.
There is an absolute truth. That is the reality we all live in wether you believe it or not. We don’t get to play God and create “reality” through our thinking. That is not how it works.
@@Josh-qo7yd I agree, but we get to choose how we interpret our reality. That makes difference. Thus we mold reality by our brain. Reality is flexible...sea of possibilies. Brain is the key.
We were made in the image of God, so, we co-create our reality with Him.
Pirate LumberJACK ... so you say, however my reality manifests very much based on my thoughts, feelings & intent and that of those around me. You speak of reality as if you understand it yet your five senses only perceive reality as you understand it. The truth of reality is not defined by ones perception and that ... is a fact
Danko Nešović I disagree. God is truth. There is so much around us that we do not understand. I have a masters in psych and worked in the clinical psych field for 2 years before I became discouraged with the same psychobabble that you are spouting now. Thinking that we create our own reality is bogus. You are deceiving yourself. The Bible is truth. the Bible is not open to interpretation. There is absolute truth in it. And I don’t understand it all but I pray. The truth from God is reality; all other “realities” are deception.
I don’t remember where I heard it recently but the gist was that everything you do or say by choice is a vote for the person you will become. Do you want to be negative or even mean? Do you want to be a procrastinator or even lazy? Or do we want to “burn off the chaff”? It’s always up to us. But every choice we make moves us another step down a path.
Nicely phrased!
Good angle
Its from the book atomic habits
"observing the thinker" is a powerful skill to develop.
Nathy t basic buddhism 101, this guy sounds like somebody insisting on you listen to a band they're unaware of, the beatles because 'it's pretty good
Meta cognition
God bless you Dr. Peterson....! You've helped men so much around the world....! Fight the nonsense culture fighting against our boys and young men...! God sent.... My prayers are with you and your family always...! ❤❤❤
Tracy77751 🙏 amen this has helped my podcast for men.
Men Nation podcast
He’s helped women too. (At least this woman; me)...☺️
Amen! 🙏
I watch/listen to these videos almost everyday, to refine the wisdom he imparts. What a good man.
As you grow up from infancy the people that you encounter influence you. They influence you to behave in a manner that makes them feel comfortable at the time. You get rewarded with companionship if you are successful and punished with distance if you’re unsuccessful. All these behaviors that you learned are very deeply rooted and it takes a lot of courage to cast them aside and remake yourself.
Perhaps we never get rid of them ..it s about 14 years I try to push them away ..I even dont talk to some of these ex close friends for the same amount of years yet my thoughts and dreams and so my life is still related and my daily energy highly affected by them..it s about how deep and powerful is my mind and memory for many people works completely different they just forget you after a day or less and your words after seconds..
A year and a half ago I started to watch Jordan Peterson to practice my English. Thanks to him I did that but I'd never stop watching him because Im learning how to apply the language by every possible means.
Thanks Jordan and God bless you
One thing I appreciate about Peterson is that he doesn’t give it all away. He asserts his ideas, but he leaves the journey of self-discovery up to his audience.
Well the thing is I think, that you have to make the journey yourself.
Thank you so much for posting these videos from JP
My pleasure, thanks for watching!
Excellent, Merry Christmas Dr Peterson , God Bless You buddy☦
wishing you a better 2021, dr peterson
We all fall short of the glory of God. We are commanded to "lean not on our own understanding" but rather, lean on the perfect truth of God & actively stay close to him from the moment we wake every day. I have to remind myself of this daily. Hopefully it's a good reminder to someone else, too.
Amen!
(& NOT "awoman". That's PC ignorance.)
Best message I ever heard.. everyone needs to hear this, we can always push to be better persons... #wakeupcall!
I swear I get a lump in my throat every time I listen to this man! Don't know why. It's not a bad thing.
Karen Swidzinski he's the father we all needed tbh
I would go see a doctor for that lump
It's probably a visceral response to hearing the truth. Is so rarely spoken. And I would imagine that you respond to hearing the truth because it's what you think inside of yourself and now you're able to experience it being spoken to you.
@@laurabarber6697 Indeed
This split in my psyche has always been there. The second part of me always watching and judging what I was really doing. Split between knowing who I am and equally not having a clue who I am. It's been hard. Jordan Peterson has helped immensely.
“Trouble is more interesting than boring”
Damn right. And that gets me into lots more trouble!
Thanks to Jordan my life has significantly improved!
i wish i had a therapy session with him
@Psychonaut read his books
He’d mess you all the way up lol that’s your worst nightmare ... trust moi
He’d be an interesting neighbor...
@@yankeedogg2212 I just want to be his friend...
its just that i really lile his general ideas and i would like to find out how i would integrate them into my life.
decisions where you cold ask him for advice
My pre work out videos before the gym.
Nice work. Listen to Converge/Tool/Deafheaven while at the gym and you'll be Superman within a year 😛
There is a reason why this man’s books are sitting on my coffee table. Awesome!
this is why i prefer to be alone, or at the very least, with like minded people. i often find my “friends” starting gossip or just talking badly behind other people’s backs for NO reason other than their own entertainment. it sickens me and i don’t know how to get them to stop so when i’m with them and they’re talking like that, i will literally just shrug at everything they say
Hold every thought captive. Father God bless you all an have a great day!
Thanks for the enhancement in the video quality and other details. That makes watching far more pleasant. Great work.
Such an honest, vulnerable speech, admitting weaknesses and faults.
Whenever I feel depressed, I come here to watch him. His words work like an antidepressant.
Wow this concept of alignment is brilliant
Hats off to this channel for putting these wonderful videos with apt captions.
Mental health is the coherence or allignment of the abstract or spiritual with the physical. Brilliant.
Thanks a lot man.
Really powerful stuff man ✊
"...As true as you can say them" is exactly what I needed to hear.
There's so much of what I start to say, but haven't dug into the core of who I am to resolve to the end what I really intend to say and stand firmly on.
Definitely reduces what does get said, but hopefully at a much higher quality by distilling it down.
Sir, you are describing so truthful! When we talk about things, people often don't understand that they/we clinch to thoughts which are constructed and not true and inherent.
Amazing work, by giving the scripts also. I saves lot of my time.. I usually go through slide by slide and take the damn notes .. I totally understand the `Content` is important, but how JP presents it is so beautiful , I do not want to miss any JP's sentence formation .
It's amazing how I am saying things, that I thought I came up with myself, and then I see a video of JP saying those exact same things 1 to 5 years before I did! 😁😁
Absolutely brilliant! Brilliant analysis. Brilliant man
Beautiful. Thanks for sharing.
I’m becoming more and more aligned :) it’s amazing how the energy and strength I feel within me is just so much more powerful from living like this. I also find myself able to write quickly and effortlessly without even thinking.
Thank you for being a guiding light in this confused world, Peterson!
Agreed. Peterson appeals to the confused section of the population. Those who have themselves at least moderately figured out consider JP to be a loon.
Great job with your channel, my friend. You’ve encapsulated a variety of profound essences.
I think separating yourself from id (thought) and ego (speaking) is very difficult when you're younger, say 25 and under. It becomes easier after 45yrs old. However, Jordan's concept is always good to at least be aware of. Something to strive for more and more each day such as listening more intently to others while putting your own ideas aside.
I love this guy!
Excellent book written by a monk: Our Thoughts Determine Our Lives
This phenomena happened to me this year. Started immediately after I learned about Carl Jung’s collective unconscious (about 2 months ago) As soon as I read about the collective i had this indescribable feeling of “HOLY SHIT THERES MORE TO LIFE” and it almost resembled an acute period of enlightenment/revelation/alignment/some gnostic type vibe. Ever since then I have been able to slowly rewire my very essence. First I observed my words/actions, then I observed my thoughts, and now im observing the observer.
Hard to describe, phenomena. Huge thanks to JP for keeping me conscious in this mentally liber stage of my life.
Modern pshycology is based off of cj work, im starting to learn the real importance of it, these days alot of people need it. I think it's due to the social isolation ppl are having these day.
I went through almost the same exact thing. When I read the part about knowing your unconscious and conscious self, I paused a little. After that, an overwhelming feeling like you mentioned flew through me. Since then, it has been very different to do things
Did that phenomenon caused you anxiety?
I love it, Carl Jung but never Jesus Christ. Guess we aren’t all destined for the narrow path.
Thank you for posting this!
I love Peterson's honesty
Alignment is key. You know when you are aligned when you feel good. Fear and anger are evidence of mis-alignment. Meditation will align you. When you are aligned with your core higher self, you will channel strength and wisdom.
Made my day just by listening to it
You know you've really made a difference in this world when people make videos of you talking with music underneath it (like Alan Watts). Love Jordan's work and the clarity of thinking he offers us all.
Good advice. Reminds me of "as a man thinketh", where the mind is what creates your external world.
This man replaced my youtube habits from chaos to order, same happened happened in life dramatically. Habit of Watching the content that builds me, has been institutionalized deep inside me.
Thanks is not enough. I will meet this father figure & wanna cry hugging. 👍
JP is fascinating. Seriously. Most of us can learn a lot...
Leave everything you don't have to be behind. 👏🏼👏🏼
This is a masterful explanation of the expression of ego against ones true self. Brilliant.
I will often pray for purity of intention and a discerning heart...
Doubt your profound comment will get many likes. For it requires humility.
@@chrisanderson9157 I do not see the post as a profound comment. It is something that I have heard or read before somewhere else and something that I aspire to personally and work toward with many episodes of failure in between, as well as something that I wanted to type in the comments section of this video. My intention was never, and is never, to fish for "likes". Be aware of assumptions and projections Mr. Anderson. Cheers.
Is yous praying to the Morning Star? 😆😈😆😈😆😈😆😈
Thank you for yet another powerful observation Jordan. The devil makes work for idle hands - and minds. It is a revelation to recognise these things creeping into ones own thinking.
He said that one really important thing there... "They come out of the depths inside you..." This came from his heart. I recommend you to listen more of him.
Wow, this is the most honest and powerful thing I have ever heard.
Excellent tie - makes a nice contrast with the suit.
This man is a genius!
Stunning speech.
It has happened to me too recently, I have noticed this immense split too.
Appreciate all the videos and content of Jordan you upload. Thanks
My pleasure! Glad you enjoy the videos :)
This video could not come at a better time
Mr Jordan indeed is a legend. I am always thrilled and excited to watch his videos or talk shows, he has got incredible qualities to win the table. He is a great intellectual and expert psychologist for this generation!!, i am really extremely inspired by him.
Leave everything you don't have to be, behind. That's gold
I think the biggest challenge. Is changing who you are on the inside. When your outside world is the same.
iv been going thru the same thought process. I've come to believe many of my thoughts are intrusions. I must dismiss them. Intrusions from where, I'm not sure, but they seem to come from nowhere, and it is my job to control them. Seems like a part of life were supposed to learn about while were here
I love that piano music in the background just swaying you
Love your videos! Thank you!
The man is a saint and a genius!!
A gift from GOD!
Watch your Thoughts- They become your Words. Watch your Words-They become your Actions. Watch your Actions-They become your Habits. Watch your Habits-They become your Character. Watch your Character-It becomes your Destiny. 🤔
Remember, God is For You. Viva Cristo Rey 😎
That was good. Thank you
@@impatief1096 Merry and Holy Christmas and Happy New year to You and Your's 😎
That's powerful advice. Thank you.
Doing great till you introduced the fictitional character at tha end!
@@dirkward2064 Hey Dirk, might it be possible for God to Really be Who He says He is, and you just haven't realized it yet? If you are a Real Seeker, be careful with your answer 🤔. Only a fool would say that God isn't Real.
Lately, peoples' perceptions of me have had me feeling like I have to act certain ways/play certain roles that aren't genuinely me. Thank you for such a powerful reminder to be 100% authentic in all my dealings. This above all: to thine own self be true!
Excellent advice. This is what I need to do too. Thank you.
Dr peterson is completely different person than what he was few months ago
Stay healthy sir
This video isn't recent. It is from mid 2017. We won't be hearing from Mr. Peterson for some time I predict. Benzos do so much damage it is an indescribable torture to endure. I am only now able to begin participating in life somewhat and I have been recovering for 4 years.
His wife has cancer. He is devastated.
I just come here for the wise words from jordan and the comment section thank you to all
Thank you!
This is a life changing 5 minutes and 51 seconds.
Bless jp.
I've done this. Example: I stopped saying "I'm Sorry" and instead of saying this I'll say "I apologize for....." or professionally "my apologies for...." I am not "sorry" or sad or pitiful or substandard, but I do think apologizing is a necessary communicative tool.
Uhhh really?
@@trumptookthevaccine1679 Yep. Really. It may be hard to comprehend, and thank you for your comment.
@@bp8764 why would you say thank you for a comment? It’s not welcome. Sign of weakness.
Incredibly concise and thorough wisdom. Thank you Mr P
JP said something smart in this video? What was it?
Thank you for being awesome ❤️
Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be. James 3:10.
"There´s only 3 kind of mental patients, the ones that have been diagnosed, the ones current under medication and the ones to be diagnose *left* in the future." Jordan Peterson.
Love the Professor... one of the greatest minds and orators of thus generation.. IMO..
This is Devine intervention.
I had this sort of split as long as I can remember but it makes me go into self-justification way too often, because you say not a hundred precent right or in a way that might be misunderstood. This justification all the time makes one seem insecure. So I guess being to reflective is also not a good thing, just like not enough reflection is also bad
Reminds me of goggins talking about tuning out the noise and looking in the mirror, being real with who you are good or bad just owning it and starting from scratch instead of living lies. Get your base on.
Thank you for your videos. God bless you.
Excellent! Thank you!🙏🏻