Honest Tea Talk Polygamy Episode Reaction pt 3/3
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- čas přidán 16. 06. 2022
- Salaam/Peace,
In this video, Coaches Nyla, Nazir, & Fatimah who have practiced polygyny over 12 years and helped 10s of thousands of people; discuss what they see in this popular episode from the Honest Tea Talk series.
This is the final part of this reaction series.
Part 1: • Honest Tea Talk Polyga...
Part 2: • Honest Tea Talk Polyga...
If you want to learn about healthy relationships and how polygyny is an ancient solution to a modern-day problem, then you should check out OPRCampus.com and join us for our LIVE Meet 'N Greets.
Grab your copy of the Polygamy Roadmap at polygamyroadmap.com
For Counseling and/or Coaching, visit: CoachFatimah.com or CoachNyla.com
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ABOUT US:
We are Coach Nazir, Coach Fatimah, & Coach Nyla. We are considered Black Americans and we were all raised as Christians. We have a keen understanding of the many facets of American culture and the ongoing challenges present within it.
Each of us accepted Islam as young adults and are practicing Muslims who follow the final revelation, The Quran, and the example of the Last & Final Prophet and Messenger, Muhammad ibn Abdullah (sws).
Coach Nazir & Fatimah were married for 15 years and had 6 children when he chose to practice polygyny. He married Coach Nyla, and our polygynous journey began.
Since then, 4 more children have been born, 1 by Coach Fatimah and 3 with Coach Nyla who has added 2 bonus children (step-children) to the family making a total of 12 children.
We had very little support and even slimmer resources when we began our journey, so things were done by trial and error and there were lots of errors! However, after being proactive in our growth and commitment for the success of the family, we figured it out and decided to be a resource for others who may be experiencing similar difficulties.
Once we got it right and reverse-engineered the method, we wanted to take away any excuses from those who say they didn't have a way to learn how to practice it correctly.
ABOUT THIS CHANNEL:
This channel is a place where we invite you to travel with us on our personal development journey to develop better and more fulfilling relationships whether you are single, married in monogamy, or practicing or looking to practice polygyny.
We share a lot about polygyny and its dynamics because our teachers and spiritual leaders have failed us in this area. Being that polygyny doesn't get its fair share of airtime, but people are still practicing it without practical education, we decided to help.
As a man, it helps provide guidance in areas of leadership, raising your financial IQ, increasing your emotional intelligence, mental awareness, and overall levels of competence and confidence.
As a woman, we help women connect to their femininity, understand how to navigate differing dynamics, how to be attractive as a whole, and how to craft a life of fulfillment no matter the challenges that present themselves.
We help committed people go from surviving to thriving. If you are dedicated to growth, love, and connection then understand that the truth may set you free, but it may upset you off first.
We will tell the truth, share best practices, and also learn from our community.
ABOUT YOU:
If you are a man or woman who is interested in becoming the best version of yourself and in turn developing rich, fulfilling, and joyful relationships with others, then you are in the right place.
If you are looking to grow, learn more, and shine when there seems to be so much darkness around, then you are on the right channel.
You will likely find it beneficial to join our Education Campus at OPRCampus.com which is Anti-Troll.
Here are a few ways we want men to benefit from our channel:
1. Better your character
2. Raise your leadership ability
3. Increase your financial intelligence
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5. Increase your emotional, mental, and spiritual intelligences
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Salaam/Peace,
Your Favorite Relationship & Polygyny Coaches
Nazir, Fatimah, & Nyla
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CoachFatimah.com & CoachNyla.com - Zábava
One of the biggest takeaways is this: Understand fully who you're getting your life advice from. No matter what the subject is, look for those who have success & prosperity in what you're seeking to find out more about.
Every video I watch about polygamy tends to focus on the women, who is focusing on the men my mum had to raise 5 kids alone after my dad died may Allah grant him Jannah because most of the men didn’t want a woman with so much baggage. We are constantly been told that men need to marry more than one wife to help the Umar but my question is how many men actually help by marrying 18 year old virgins as a second wife when there are so many widows and divorced mothers with kids out there. In Africa (Nigeria to be precised) it’s very very rare for men to pick women with kids who truly need help and protection instead they all want brand new virgins. I still think it’s unfair as to how women are being emotionally blackmailed if my husband insists on Polygamy I wouldn’t stop him but I know for a fact that it will be very very difficult for me to accept wholeheartedly and it will take time for me to get to that place of healing. We all handle situations differently which is why Allah never made Polygamy a must it’s an option so a woman having a hard time with it is not a sin in my opinion it’s called being human. I might be wrong but it’s how I feel no offense meant to anyone may Allah guide us all.
I would absolutely love for you guys to meet the the sisters from Honest Tea Talk!
I love and appreciate you all sharing! Thank you!
Soo happy you made these reaction vids, I had watched this episode of Honest Tea Talk and felt it was a very one sided and dismal view of the structure of polygamy pbbly bc of what other folks really do go through but also bc of how we all have this imagined all doom and gloom view of polygamy. If we are not careful, we perpetuate dangerous stereotypes of our own deen or Muslim men.
I really hope OPR and HHT can have a nice episode together where all aspects are presented and discussed. Good job as usual, mashAllah!
Much respect, ty for taking on this toxicity and bringing another narrative
Actually it must be most hard to deal with" it" being first wife..
And Sisterhood yes..
But every one is unique differently..
Not everyone comes along.
It Need a Wise Man..
HHT REACTION - Thank you for sharing your views on this episode of HHT, I wached it a while back and was left very sad of what I perceived then as "the mistreatment" of women in... your reaction brought a more balance unerderstanding of the subject. Thanks
Have these women done a response video? Very interesting and loving the content. Keep challenging people and views like this. Polygyny needs to be normalized
سلام عليكم..
I love you..
And I love those Sisters too..
Salam alikum OPR!
wa alaykum as salaam wa rahmatullah
HTT, please continue may Allah give you more Eman and us, too !
One question, is your courses only about polygene, like do you have about monogamy, too, cz definitely would be useful to me.
and thank you as always for your content ♥
Allahumma ameen. Our courses are focused on personal growth. They are designed for people whether single or married in monogamy or polygyny.
Our True Queens & Kings & Kingdoms programs deal mainly with individuals and marriage in general but there are modules dedicated to those desiring to be in or are already practicing polygyny.
Our Polygyny focused course is at PolygamyMasterclass.com which is solely focused on poly issues.
Thank you Coaches for educating us and giving us a personal look into Polygyny. I have chosen to be a second wife, Inshallah. People act like I have chose this without thinking of his 1st wife, but honestly she's all I think about. I want to make sure the transition is as easy for all 3 of us. She has a child and I'm coming in with 2 kids from a previous relationship. Your videos have made me feel more secure in my decision, Alhamdulillah.
Duas..stay strong
The point is.. . . Nothing is ever the same. Ever. Period For the first wife...husband. .. second wife and children..extended family...everyone is affected. Saying your marriage is your marriage is not the same in polygamy. The theater of drama...the scenarios are not the same with another estrogen feminine energy/energies in the picture. There will always be that other energy/energies. The door of the past life before is shut. Bang!
The good question is to have the intention of looking at the blessings. Saying. "Nothing is ever the same" does not necessarily mean it is all bad changes. Is it a test or a blessing? Inchallah it will eventually be more blessings than tests! Ameen!
HTT Reaction!
That's raw
Assalamu’alaykum
I understand and agree that incoming wives go through insecurities, fears and pain but we cannot compare this situation of choosing a situation to a situation that is “being imposed”.
Yes, I know, nobody can force someone to stay as we are grown people but still none initial wife will decide in the first seconds of acknowledging the situation to divorce. Therefore in this case she has to go through the process of accepting Allah’s plan. She has to deal with this decision that was not something she was looking for.
I believe that we should give the right to everyone and acknowledge facts, yes the incoming wives matter, they deserve love, respect and consideration but we must acknowledge the fact that they chose to be in this marriage and therefore had to think and accept to work on the feelings which could come up, and this makes things easier as they were given the choice to decide and prepare themselves.
I just feel sometimes there is a lack of acknowledgment of the facts, but maybe I’m mistaken or do not comprehend properly, in which case, my apologies.
This being said, I appreciate the videos and insights. May Allah bless you all.
Wa alaykum as salaam wa rahmatullah. Allahumma ameen. We appreciate your comment and support however, your response is a common response that puts a versus between wives in polygyny. No one is comparing the situations of wives, but that of emotional as well as spiritual maturity.
There is a lack of acknowledgement of the facts however, can we be objective as to where?
It is true that an incoming wife made a choice of marrying a married man however there are things you can only prepare for through your own personal development and work for increasing your emotional maturity. An incoming wife doesn't think to prepare for a family not liking her, a community degrading her and a husband possibly divorcing her or leaving her to sort through the challenges she may be going through in order to "make" his initial wife understand his decisions and that he still loves her and that she is not being replaced. A choice that Allah has deemed permissible and has regulated for the protection of women. The only way to prepare for any challenge whether it be in marriage, monogamy or polygyny, or life in general is to increase your emotional and spiritual intelligence. That goes for everyone involved.💎~Coach Nyla
Yeah I’m going to discuss this with my kids but I’m going to TELL them what I’m going to do. It’s not up to them. I’m going to tell my kids what they about to go through and how to get through it. Otherwise, find their own family and raise it to the best of their ability. Children don’t make their own decisions under my protection
That's how it goes!
HTT Reaction
😇😇😇
HTT REACTION
One thing about the sister in the polyganist marriage deciding to leave. She may believe it is the best decision for her soul but she can very well end up putting her soul in a worst state. Because of her not having the insight where her husband and the marriage was a shield for her. Of course I'm talking about where things can be worked through and the conflict is more over emotions and imagined harms.
I take these ladies are polygamous wives themselves, right? Then it would make sense that their talking about it.
Which ladies? In the video reacting? If you mean them, no they are not.
Young women are taught they must possess a man in western culture, so I excuse these young sisters but all Muslims need to look at what is acceptable in this society and it is everything Allah forbids.
We'd excuse if they didn't know better and have a platform, we understand but don't condone.
@@outstandingpersonalrelationshi they're operating from emotions, hurt, ignorance, feminization of men and y'all know lack of support for all marriages. I'm in the hood, monogamy and polygyny are under attack.
Tis true dear sis, tis true
Interesting conversation, I know that I couldn't stay in a marriage with co-wives. I would just leave, with the kids, and tell the husband that he could visit them when he wanted. I think working to support my life and children's lives would be less of a strain than to live with a man with multiple wives. In all honesty, I think that I would not respect him anymore and would want to distance myself from him as much as possible so that my kids wouldn't see the negativity that I may carry. Amazing that you have developed a loving family that way. It would be probably impossible for me to do.
So sad to see how prevalent this type of destructive thinking and behavior is.
Purposely choosing to put children in a single parent household thinking it's better when data shows it lowers their overall quality of life and future options is nothing less than victimizing the children because their father expanded his family, smh.
I also reject the statement of sister Sumayyah about divorce being hated being cultural. We have cleared authentic text showing that it is hated by Allah. She needs to fear Allah in speaking about the legislation of Allah in a tone dominated by emotion. And the feminist vibes are strong coming from her.
I would like to advise, polygamy is illegal in (or almost all) jurisdictions in the United States. Regardless if its (polygamy) done in a religious context or a secular/civil marriage, it’s illegal under the law. I suggest you read U.S Supreme Court Case: Reynolds v. United States of 1879. Even though it’s over 140 years ago, jurisprudence is still legally mandated and enforced. The constitution, and federalism, requires all government bodies (state and municipal) to follow the law.
Whatever you think your doing by “bringing light” to polygamy, just know that it’s ILLEGAL under the law
Everyone who has more than one girlfriend at a time would need to be punished. Every cheater etc., it is simply not enforced nor do all judges interpret it as polygamy if the marriage is not registered.
I would also like to add, as reference, the Federal Circuit Court of the 10th district-which is the most recent case of polygamy seen by a federal court- ruled that even if a marriage was formally solemnized in any religious context, even if not registered subsequently, is still considered an illegal polygamous marriage under the law and constitutional jurisprudence.
@@bigboywasim It doesn’t matter if it was registered. So as long as there was a religious ceremony, regardless if it’s 2nd, 3rd or how ever many subsequent polygamous unions, it’s illegal under the law.
@@ricardoabeyta7223 So is having multiple girlfriends at one time treated the same in states where there is no common law marriage. Let us say no religious marriage was done.
@@bigboywasim I really do suggest that you read Reynolds v. United States of 1879 to actually understand the laws governing polygamous marriages. Even if it was an Islamic polygamous union, Mormon, or any religion that allows polygamous marriages to be solemnized, it’s illegal.
The smartes thing a muslim can do to avoid such women is mention polygamy, if she says she has no problem with it even if she really does then you have all the rights to divorce her later down the line, but if she shows hate towards do not marry even if she is a muslim.
mostpeople,should,just,accept,that,muslim,men,are,polygamous,by,default.
Muslim men? What is different about their DNA from other men?