Depression After Narcissistic Abuse Has A Purpose
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- čas přidán 28. 08. 2018
- Narcissistic abuse is an undeniable crisis. Discover Healing, Empowerment, and Authentic Living...
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The Royal We has helped Millions to escape the grip of narcissistic abuse. Here’s a deeper look into what narcissistic abuse looks like and steps to heal from it:
Narcissistic abuse looks like:
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often show little to no empathy for others, making it easy for them to manipulate and exploit. Narcissists use various tactics such as gaslighting, love bombing, and devaluation to control and dominate their victims.
Common Tactics Used in Narcissistic Abuse:
Gaslighting: Making the victim doubt their own reality and sanity.
Love Bombing: Showering the victim with excessive attention and affection to gain control.
Devaluation: Undermining the victim’s self-worth through criticism, belittling, and emotional neglect.
Isolation: Cutting the victim off from their support systems to increase dependency on the abuser.
Triangulation: Using others to create jealousy or competition, keeping the victim feeling insecure.
Healing from Narcissistic Abuse
How to begin healing from narcissistic abuse:
Understand that you have been enduring narcissistic abuse. This awareness is the first step toward healing.
Get Help:
Work with The Royal We to get the tools to understand and process your experiences. Visit - www.jointheroyalwe.com
Establish No Contact or Low Contact:
Limit or completely cut off communication with the narcissistic abuser. This helps you gain emotional distance and begin your healing journey.
Rebuild Your Self-Esteem:
Engage in activities that boost your confidence and self-worth. Surround yourself with supportive, positive people who value and respect you.
Educate Yourself:
Learn about narcissistic abuse and its effects. Knowledge is empowering and can help you recognize patterns and avoid future toxic relationships.
Practice Self-Care:
Prioritize your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Regular exercise, a healthy diet, adequate sleep, and mindfulness practices can all contribute to your recovery.
Set Boundaries:
Develop and maintain healthy boundaries in all your relationships.
Connect with others who have experienced narcissistic abuse. Join The Royal We Support Group - theroyalwe.kartra.com/page/ynE48
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My personality did like a complete 180. It's so crazy! It's like I forgot what happiness feels like.
OMG say it again they suck the life out of you.
I feel you bro, i had it done to me
Tyler Barnes It’s the same for me. It’s taken about 4 years for me to start feeling okay and I still get depressed.
i know exactly what you mean
4 years since the discard. 1 year N.C. I wonder when my joy will come back...😢
We should treat emotional injuries the way we treat physical injuries, when a person is in a car crash we give them time to heal, we need to give ourselves time to heal.
So true, beautifully said!
Emotional is worse
LocalTourist I totally agree. It also takes a toll on your finances. We need a break from the worry for that as well.
LocalTourist thank youuu!!❤️
LocalTourist in a world full of narcs.....doubtful ☹️
I literally wanted to vomit at the thought of another man coming on to me. The fear and anxiety of going through the same experience was too much!
I've heard it be described that "depression" is actually just "unfinished grief". It's something to experience, and work through, and is part of the process. It occurs when then blinders have been removed, and there is a realization of what was, what never was, what could have been, how much the priorities need to be redirected. The narcissist tries to get you to deny your true self, and kill your joy and spontaneity that would otherwise occur. All in an effort to assert their superiority and dominance over their victim. Some do it covertly, but it's abusive no matter how it's done. Once one realizes the dynamic, it is "depressing" because a shift is now happening. Peace.
I've heard something similar ;
Depression is your body's way of telling you that you are living in a way that is inconsistent with your beliefs.
So......I needed to get back to asking myself "what do I really believe, why am I tolerating this, how do I get back to walking in Truth?"
I cared for myself and didn’t stay in the relationship very long but it still hurts that I cared about someone that never cared about me
Try being born to one (narc mother)...
This has been going through my mind lately too, I've been reminding myself of the first part of that sentence though....i cared for myself (&my daughter) and didn't stay in the manipulationship. Period. Because that moment of clarity started me on the healthier path. 💜
Sometimes that’s my only solace. I figure, you can’t lose something that you never really had because it was all fake anyway so there’s nothing to mourn.
I have realized I mourn the fantasy I had while being with him- that it would be different somehow someday.
Lack of interest, lack of drive, lack of concern... that does sounds like my last narcissist! I am away from him now it’s painful but feel so good at the same time! Good luck to all, if you are suffering of withdrawal symptoms it’s because you are on the way to mental health again.
It’s insane how our bodies go through a withdrawal period. I feel it too!
Going thru withdrawal now…it’s awful. 😢
Your ideas about "depression with purpose" coincide very closely with the ideas I'm having. This is helpful, and a boost to my confidence. I will recover and come back stronger than ever, even at my age. Thanks.
Sending you blessings, may God make your path easier🙏
Great topic.
You wonder why you feel miserable because once you were so happy when you finally got away from the abuser. Then the people around you tell you to just forget about it not knowing it doesn't work like that. Then you start researching and keep doing it until you find yourself quite different from whom you used to be.
I lost my way because of giving out too much of myself. I lacked interest in many things and people. I was a people pleaser. Now I do what I want. I've just taken up a skipping rope and love the benefits it brings me. It also stops these narcs/bullies from entering my personal space. Nobody likes a whiplash. Good talk Kevin
Thank you. Skipping rope is fun.
I normally like everyone
Now i like being alone ,yet lonely
I dont do things to get applause
Etc
I liked doing things for people
Me too. It is a waking nightmare to have a narc for a sibling, my best friend does and her life seems haunted lately. She's literally beloved, never mean, helps everyone. I don't want her or you to ever be stuck in your home or withdrawing from life. :*( She is disabled so I'm scared for her a lot. I wish he would get caught finally (he steals, does drugs, gambles then goes to church so their parents will say oh what a good man he is) but who knows if there is ever justice on earth, you know?
Same.
@@Bonbonbon739 sorry Eric
😥💔
Now, Everyone is a narcissist, unless proven otherwise.
@@donnafoley9684 Because they are EVERYWHERE!!
Don’t deprive me of my depression (was my mindset, and it was helpful) - I needed to be there at the time. It lifts when it does.
Go with it - I agree!
If you didn’t feel this way, it wouldn’t be normal.
Just give yourself the time you need - it absolutely will turn around!
This is a couple years old but thank you. I went through the worse time during quarantine and he almost took my life. It was the scariest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. That’s also the day something turned off in me. I was fine until recently. I fled and left with just my son and the clothes we had in. Worked hard for months to get a car and a job and a hike for us. I should be enjoying my home. I should be happy and proud of myself and I feel so bad. Everybody misses the old me but she died. Now I’m just alone with my feelings and thoughts. No one to talk to or who cares to understand and tbh I don’t wanna be here anymore but I’m trying to hang on. For my son. But it’s hard cuz nothing I do is good enough everything I do is wrong. But I feel I will be better eventually.
Nothing you do is wrong. Your brain has been so stressed out due to this type of abuse. I’m going through something similar. Find joy in the small things and remember you’re not alone!!
I felt that way before, nothing I do or I did was right. All the sacrifices I did was wrong! - wrong for the narcissist!!! There’s nothing right for them except their recognition of their “rights “ against yours! You have no right to live your own life in the eyes of narcissist! I’ve have lived 23 years of “ it’s not my life , it’s his!” There’s was even a time in my life that I was denied an access to claim my own paycheck for 5 years because he takes them!!!
Agreed. I “should” be enjoying my new life, but everything I’d hoped for was stolen from me, there is no getting it back, and I don’t have anything left in this life to hope for. I’ll stick around for my kids, but man, I’m ready to go home.
T Greene, I do understand... the narcissistic abuse was more difficult than anything I'd ever experienced, and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I married a friend I'd known for over 30+ years. I Didn't know he was a narcissist. I married him in 2014 and had to run for my life in 2016, with just the clothes on my back, important papers, and my laptop. I went "NO CONTACT" and almost went back but I spoke with a domestic violence counselor who advised me against it. He took out a $100,000 life insurance policy on me and allegedly tried to kill me. I am so happy that I listened to the DV counselor and didn't go back. I've had suicidal ideations and thought about ways to end my life, however, I have two grown sons, and could not imagine the hurt that would've caused them. Keep your son before you and don't allow your thoughts to run away with you, because he needs his mommy. I'm so thankful that God held on to me because ending my life seemed to be the only way out. Trust me "T" you will be better eventually. I don't know if you are a believer or not, but if you are, I will encourage you to press in and spend more time in God's word. Therapy has helped me tremendously! I just tuned into Royal We and it has truly been a blessing!
You have so opened my eyes. I have been in a state of depression since July when he told me he had a new supply, even though I left him in March. I have felt so low, and now after listening to you I feel like there is hope and help for me. Thank you!
This is amazing. I have never heard anything close to this take on the aftermath. Kevin, you are simply in the right place at the right time.
Brad McEwen, Same here. So helpful & positive !
And theres me too!! but Ive taken 60 years with an abusive narc.. so Im not even feeling like a human anymore! ive been too ashamed to tell anyone before ... it started with a mother narc, then a boyfriend narc who blackmails emotions to have his way??? So at 15 years old its a shotgun wedding, to save face for family . And because I would not let any doubters and nay sayers be righteous.. I was determined to “pay my dues” and make it work! Thinking all along, that I would find a way to change him, if I could just run faster on the hampster wheel, I would eventually make it right! Welll, at 64 yrs of age I suffered a major STROKE, lucky to have lived, and now its twelve years later, Im severely disabled but still putting up with his cruelty, as I need his help desperately in order to just survive, I have become the shell with no soul, its a very hard shell and I will never let him break it, will keep on keeping on right to the end. i was brave enough 8 years ago to leave home and got moved to assisted living residence...have had time to think without constant badgering and have isolated myself, from deep depression until I can find myself again hoping the younger version comes back, cuz This old crow is not very energetic these days, she doesn’t want to do any of the fun stuff I used to do, sew, quilt, paint, etc. Etc. Well mobility in a wheelchair isn’t that easy! Sooo my story is for the people in a RELATIONSHIP who need to run FAST AND DON’T LOOK BACK,! Unless .. heaven forbid .. you may end up like me?? Trust me nobody needs to live like this,my regret is so very sad that I did not leave when I was able to run, Its my own fault, well.. Im pretty dumb, stupid ,.. and every other horrid description victims are labelled with, so.. no wonder I stayed there so long.. just a little BRAINWASHED, EH.?? .. don’t let it happen to you!!
Yes Exactly the way it goes
@@cherylidler2386 WOW!!! I wish I could talk to you. I'm 52 and just left a 25 year marriage 2 months ago. I'm frozen.
Exactly!
I always think "this is the best video he's ever done," then you drop one that's even more awesome. Thank you! ❤
This one in awesome! So valuable, appreciated and delivered so well.
I agree..💯
Same here!
This August will be 3 years since I went no contact. The anxiety is gone. The paranoia is gone. But so is my personality, my motivation, and my passion for anything. I am numb. I care about nothing.
Wow! Thanks for sharing! I’m on the same 3 year timeline too and I feel exactly like you! I never gave it those words though. Wow. Crazy. Hugs to you.
I am so sorry. Im just a month out after 16 years. This scares me. I feel like this now Ill die if it went on that long. I hope yoir better now I see this comment was a year ago. Xo
I just broke no contact and it’s the worst feeling than him discarding me nothing feels worse than this.
I wasn’t allowed to show my feelings to my narc. So I am fighting being numb. But today I felt a new feeling that I can’t keep being depressed. I don’t want to wallow anymore. Tired of it! It’s very very uncomfortable. Very. Thanks for your message. Helpful.
I'm on track from the signs of depression... I'm at self-care and feeling better after unknowingly going through Narcissist abuse. Thank you again for your video affirming my healing🎯
+Sandra Taylor thank you for watching 🙌🤗🤗
I am currently going through all these things, just realising I am in control of me. It is like a spiritual awakening
💯👑🙌
The betrayal .. the missing of the person she pretended to be ..
Knowing she’s with another, when she’s telling me she’s not ..
Realising the person I was in love with is EVIL.. you cannot describe the pain level .. it’s soul destroying
Hi, Kevin ! I get excited seeing you post a video every time. Love your warm, positive vibes.
Narcissism is a very dark topic and ur presentation brings so much comfort and light.
You remind us we have HOPE.
I have been under the radar because I AM depressed and I lost my motivation for life :-( Been spending time in isolation for 3 mths now. Keep thinking it'd get better and it is but its very slow.
This video is timely.
Everything you said is true.
I seem to be feeling empty and Im looking for someone to " fill my cup ". Only thing is, theres no ONE who is gonna be able to do that for me. I have to do it for me.
Thats why its mind boggling.
Cause I dont know where to start but if we're looking for ways, we will find one eventually.
Hi Rebecca, I read your comment and it certainly speaks to me. It has been 8 months of being out and I am very much in isolation and working on me. Like I said to Kevin I thought there was something so wrong with me because I had no motivation and no interests but when he said look at it as a transformation it made me feel so much better about it. Now is the time we can totally create ourselves and be who we are meant to be and start growing and healing even more. xx
@@victoriaholden7774 : Hi, Victoria. Thanks for replying. This journey is challenging and somewhat painful even towards the healing I seek. Working on ourselves is not the easiest. It takes time and commitment to heal old wounds. Ive been in isolation to avoid unnecessary contact with the outer world narcissists. I am not ready to deal with life as of now. Also, I dont want to have my very fragile sense of self esteem further hijacked.
Ive noticed that getting into the process of becoming who we are meant to be would require us to empty ourselves so when we become whole again, we make it a priority to build our foundation and structure based on what is pure, true and beneficial to our wellbeing. It takes time. I just cant deal with the disappointment.
Look for the only way... and Jesus will find YOU.
@@5winder : I believe that
Amen !
Rebecca-Joy Henson Awesome reply! Thank you Kevin for making these videos. They help beyond belief.
this really spoke to me. putting depression into this perspective is like finding a key to a locked door!
This is exactly where I'm at after 2 months of no contact and my mind has been trying to figure out why I'm depressed. This gives me hope that this will end. It makes perfect sense. This is also helping me rewire how I've thought about myself. Thank you for your videos!
Your advice is like a life line!
Tanya Loots , So true !
I have been on the road to end my marriage for this exact reason...my husband has knocked down every interest I’ve had in the last 20 yrs. If not for his job with Army, which always gave me breaks from to do things he’d discouraged, I would not have accomplished nothing. Now, I was just diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer and he is trying to use my illness to return from Kuwait. I don’t want him with me but if something happens to me our children will need someone. I know he doesn’t have real concern because he’s never cared about me any other time. We have six children and he’s never gone to one prenatal and when it was time for delivery he’d watch tv in my room until the drs would come in and he’d act involved. You’re definitely correct that if I’d had more care and concern for myself I’d never would have been with him. He has many other females that he spends time with; he calls them his “sisters”
O.k. You sound just like me years ago.. what a mother wont do, or put up with for the sake of our kids eh? Kudos to you for that .. my dear! But do try to get out fast as you can, you can be strong while you have health, but with him you can lose that faster than a blink, I did, long story now hemiplegic, so. Run.. and don’t look back darlin’ and Gods speed to you ..from me!💋👀BEST, cheryl♿️⚠️🛑❤️🧡💛💚💙
Yes I'm going through a divorce now ruined my life. He bring me down I fought everyday to be happy to be calm and everything he wanted to do I supported I couldn't catch his triggers so I stayed on my toes. Took on all the responsibility of our kids took all the responsibility for our hang ups never got told how beautiful I was... Or how good of a mother.. we went through 5 places within 4 years because he was also physically abusive. We slept in a car together in a poolhall in the freezing cold and I was 7 months pregnant. Before that I worked got us places cars. Now I have my first ever felony cause he wanted to keep stealing Everytime we went out. He had me come on the Greyhound with my two toddlers to Greensboro thinking we we're gonna work on our family. Then left us stranded living in a hotel I had to sell my body for Pampers and food
@@lovemarie335 I am soooo sorry. How horrible and painful. I pray you and your baby are ok and away from that evil beast.
Kevin you are a life preserver from the highest realms. YHWH has blessed you immeasurably 😊👌
Narcissist love to shock an individual. X loved to shock me every day for 10 years. I call it Narcissistic abuse shock.
This is what they do and you can’t think correctly because you’re always stressed from the constant shock
Love your videos. So helpful. I’m coming out of a 4 yr relationship with a narcissist and was also raised by a narcissist mother. Not only am I dealing with all this pain right now, I’m also trying to recover from a brain tumor that I had removed 6 months ago. Life is hard right now but your videos give me hope.
I hope your well!
I thought I was well over my 'depression' from leaving my narcissistic ex ~ but listening you talk about 'lack of motivation, and drive' hit me like a block of cement to my mind ~ cause that is EXACTLY what has happened and I thought it was because of the weather! I've learned so much about narcissism that it nauseates me that I ever allowed this man to emotionally abuse me, degrade me, and it affected me psychologically. I am SLOWLY healing , , ,and it feels good to come back to being myself again, one day at a time.
. .
My narc husband was depressed. Now I see why... he wasn’t getting supply; not being recognized and boosted by others.
Wow I been through a lot I almost killed myself when I first got into a relationship with this man another woman was in luv with him he said he had broke up with her she knew about me and she went into depression and killed herself after all these years I understand why she killed herself I was the youngest he dated and just got over him but so angry that I want to hurt ppl but I pray and meditate and look forward to brighter things now thank you its hard but I'm doing it.
@@katarzynagrabosz2709 am I supposed to look her up?
The Picture of Dorian Gray is a novel by Oscar Wilde. Maybe that is a reference to it?
Thank you for this video! I've been stuck for over a year and didn't know why I was feeling like this. This video made me shed a tear. Everything is true.
Thank you for watching
Wow!!! Married to a narcissist for 5 years and he discarded me April 20, 2020 for his new supply. Going through this depressed state and have been in this state all while I was married. 😢 loved this video and needed to see it!
My issue is i was my mothers caretaker. it's not so simple.... emotionally when you were a child and were put in the position to care for a parent. This is an empath.
I had goals till he crushed each one of them. (He is bipolar, ADHD) I was never insecure of who I was but I saw he was very Bizarre
This is where I'm at!!! I was loaded down with emotional toxins...the cleanse has been underway for a couple of weeks and the difference is OUTSTANDING. I credit God's grace, mercy, love, and joy...combined with the education and support I've received from your materials and others such as Inner Integration. God Bless you Kevin, you and every single member of this online community who has made the difference. Knowing I'm not alone, getting validation - has been the turning point for me. I feel ALIVE and that's saying quite a bit considering just how low I was. I could go on!!!
I wonder - how many depressed and medicated folks out there have nothing wrong with THEM, but have just been subjected to this insidious abuse? How many more out there are waiting to meet their true selves, perhaps for the first time in their lives?
Thank you...great help here!...I also feel I've always had depression due to abuse since childhoid...all the awards and accolades don't wipe out the emptiness...otherwise it makes no sense whatsoever to hook up with a narcissist....many would never put up with them for a minute...it's us....it's us
I hope it transforms me
So far destroyed me
Once the other narc leaves my house
I will hopefully be better
Almost 4 years of depression
And before that
5 years w other narc
Cathy thank you for your post..It will 3years in January .I have realised I have had narc abuse all my life and like yourself Cathy still in this depression.Isolation and not looking after myself.
Your post gives a little light because ive been giving myself a hard time because this is taking so long to shift...I have made a big decision to get up the gym next week ...(I have gained 4stone and counting!
I wish yourself recovery and transformation, I do think this isolation is the fear and I think the weight gain is not wanting any attention my way, Their so evil and this I find hard to digest,..Best wishes Cathy x
@@lynkent677 thank u
Ive been a bit better past few weeks
Im praying very hard to be delivered from every feeling toward him
Sad how we love them yet they hate us
He hid the real him ,until we were married
I dont hate him at all
Im just sad
Cathy Baby you will not heal living with an abuser. You are prolonging your suffering and delaying your healing while making yourself sicker everyday you have contact.
Amen. You set the agenda, don't put your life on hold waiting for a Narc. Especially if it's a sibling with a key to the house.
Cathy Baby , Try to get into therapy with a therapist who is experienced with narcissistic abuse. Kevin is great... You sound like a very nice person. Translation = perfect target for another narcissist. Prayers & Blessings. 🙏 🌤️
God is giving me your videos one by one … I asked Him to help me and I’m so grateful
Kev you have just given me some freedom with this. I am exactly at this place and I thought there was something wrong with me that I had no motivation or get up an go. I will look at this as transformation and keep feeling the discomfort so that I can get through it. I think I actually touched on this the other day with you and it is also part of the healing. I feel so much better that this is part of the journey and it is time for me to look within even more so now. You are a blessing! xx
Hi accept me on fb Loukas Vasiliou if you wanna be friends lol
Kevin you're the man, I never thought about depression that way👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Holly s@#t....talk about a light being turn on! Incredible way to change how you look at this!
Thank you so much for making this video. I listen to this every morning and it has helped me make it through many days.
Wow sooo happy I found your channel. Thank you. I need to detox from my sister...not the same type of abuse but I was put down and abused psychologically (with the back and forth love/hate cycles) for the past 20 years. This will give me lots of strength to stay in the no contact zone. The hardest part will be to sacrifice seing me 2 nieces..which is how she always reels me back in.
I have had to cut her out more times that I can count..sure hope I can stick with the #mefirst for the first time in my 38 year life!!!
They will use their kids to keep that line of abuse tethered to you.
No Contact is the way...
OMG, DA !!!!.... Our stories are parallel! ~ My "adopted sister" intensely connected with me a little over 20 yrs ago. It was like she "knew me better than I knew myself"! - I revered her wisdom (being 9 yrs older) & she was "there" for me during a nasty breakup, and grief/loss over family...
Yet, looking back ~ in 2009, things began to change. She went from being supportive of me to seeing me as having something she wanted for herself (envious). So she moved closer to me (over 300 miles away), brought her pregnant daughter & son-in-law. Then I fell in love - bonding with my great-niece. ... A few years later, she had a son with Autism. (I never wanted kids of my own, but my niece's kids became so precious to me!).
She convinced me to go in on buying a 4k sf home for the whole family, since we all wanted to see the kids succeed in a stable environment...
Though I had to front the initial cost since she (and my niece/nephew) had too much debt & poor credit.
~ The devaluation/discard phase began thanks to COVID. = I ended up in the attic - in solitary confinement (as the whe family ignored me / "stonewalling") with no food, running water, daylight, or interpersonal human contact for 22 days. That was when I began to contemplate suicide, thinking my sister would be happy that I left her and the children my $65k in life insurance and she could be rid of the inconvenience that was my existance in her life (as she had made it clear over a year previously that she wanted the house... but did not want to live there with me in it, since she made me out to be a threat & danger to the kids). Accusations and name-calling were harsh for the year leading up to quarantine (which she said were simply her observations of my behaviors), describing me as "irrational", "reactive" with "overly emotional" responses when she negated my reality and replaced my thoughts/feelings with her projections (accusing me of "gaslighting", theft, and a complete disregard of her boundaries - as she made relentless demands with zero respect for my 1 & only boundary to avoid assumptions of my intentions). She was incapable (or unwilling) to simply ask through assertive "I-statements" to take responsibility of her thoughts/emotions... about what I meant to clarify her understanding (often jumping to conclusions, demonstrating her belief that her "feelings are facts").
Just wanted to say a big thank you for your videos !! They are incredibly liberating and helped me breath again after so long. God bless you and thank you for what you do, your videos brought so much to me. Thank you once again 🙏🏻!!
Thanks for the in depth analysis. Losing interest is how the narcissist pulls the positive person under, but you are right about rediscovery. I'm still contemplating the meaning of Walk don't Run and how it could work for me..
You're right. They do not care. They use you up for their own needs. You feel like garbage. Been depressed for a year.
Its true, its impossible to care for others on an empty cup. I noticed I feel better and more adjusted when I don't talk to certain people. People who, regardless if they are aware of themselves, are toxic from complaining about their own problems to you. I have people expecting me to care about their dramas, but I honestly can't. I've been accused of being shallow or careless, but in reality I've just been drained and spent most of my life giving energy I don't have to others. I realized its people taking advantage of my emotions. Needy people are always in search of energy from those willing to give it. I'm better off by myself. Things are more simple and sound that way.
Wow! My eyes open more and more each day. You put words to what I have been going through for years.
A narcissist will leave you for dead and not look back!
Creatures of the dark lagoon!
Good riddance the best thing he ever did was found new supply; exit stage right gone!
I was just describing to my sister experiencing this postive feeling I couldn't explain while I was watching your last video, and then THIS ONE CAME ON while I was typing! Such a confirmation! I told her this shattering that has taken place, totalled me so bad, that it has reset me. HARD reset me! And I'm loving myself and enjoying myself and my interests and my interest in men because of that pain is so low and it has driven me somewhere GOOD. This is so hard to explain but something naturally good has come out of the worst pain and experience I've ever had in my life!!! I didnt expect this. Ive had many hurts and heartbreak ls and tragedies but THIS last one totalled me. I thought I was done for and then God began to work.
Amen to this!!! Currently going through depression. Still in a narcissistic marriage.
I love your energy, this can be a very tough subject to speak about but you do it very well!
Omg!!!!
You are the first to get it. To say how I feel. Not even my psychotherapist could do that. I’ve let my life go. I don’t even open my mail.
This feels like shit. I’ve been stuck. Fml.
+Mandy Porras this is where you begin, and you build from this place. You will have a different perspective on everything in life now.
Dude you are awesome. I'm in a bad place. Scared I don't even know what a healthy relationship is. Dont know who to trust.
+hhowlerin I understand
(Janice) I hate who I have become. I don't know this woman living in me. I was once filled with love and kindness. I worked in various care-giving jobs and was involved in church ministries. Someone once said to me: "I love the light that shines from you." Now, I am either numb or hate-filled (the narc says I am hate-filled). The darkness envelopes me. I withdrew from everyone because I had no light left. Narc always resented my popularity of the old me. He should be happy now. She's dead.
Wow I did …. That’s what drove me and made me feel fulfillment making them happpy until they abused me …..I was on a mission to please I was so happy doing every bit of it …
You nailed this description totally!!! Amen Kevin!
I just don't understand how anyone could thumbs down this.
This is crucial information, I can't explain how grateful I am for it.
Thank you Kevin.
Love following you. I always get good wisdom from you.
"My motivation and drive has always been from gratifying others. But now it has to be from WITHIN myself! Its something INSIDE of you that NO ONE CAN TAKE AWAY! That drive is in ME and you can't take it away no matter what you say!!!"----OH MY GOD!!! I NEEDED these words! This depression is EXACTLY what i have been going through for past 6 months.... and you are so right that there is a transformation going on that the outside motivation and validation just doesn't appeal anymore! And i dont know What does... im forced to rediscover my self and my passions....
I forgot to add that he was so hurt and said I abandoned him and then after ignoring him for a month were fighting. Then he listened to all my worries and asked if he could see me on the weekend . I was ready to see him, and he resch me and then I told him no to coming later. I felt like something better came up . He asked why and I told him that Im upset. Now im discarded after receiving lovey dovey texts and emails from him. He has fully blocked me . It so painful.. I should of known when he never really asked about my life.
Great Video, I love your videos , it’s like a light at the end of a tunnel. Uplifting, encouraging, an positive
You give us hope to go on, you UNDERSTAND even when we don’t understand. Thank you an God Bless
+Tanya Kelly thank you so much Tanya for watching I appreciate your words of encouragement
Fantastic message Kevin & a great video. I needed to hear this today.
Blown away. Thank you. Have been depressed and didn’t feel able to live any more. This video helps me understand why.
What a fantastic motivational video. I feel so much better after watching this. xxx
Brilliant. Spot on. Love your enthusiasm. Makes complete sense. Thank you!!
Love the passion here! Excellent message, indeed.
This whole thing has been so unreal, I thank God I found out
about emotional abuse, and that my boyfriend of 23 years is a malignant narcissist. Twenty years came & went... Like the seasons... Change is the only thing we can rely on here, and the last 3 years have been a rollercoaster ride from hell!! BTW, congrats on getting far away from the BS.
I WANT TO GET AWAY TOO!😇
We r practically neighbors! I live on the east side of the Mississippi, O 'Fallon Illinois. I desperatly need to shed all that is no longer for my highest good. Thank u 4 all u do! Peace
Awh EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED TO HEAR...thank you SO MUCH😊❤️🙏🏼
Thank you again, Kevin. Always inspirational and psychologically healing.
Transformation,🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌🙌. After the abuse, I was bedridden 3 months.... THANK YOU!!! " The drive is within in, doesn't matter what you say".
The most valuable information I've heard in my entire life! I have been learning these things intuitively overtime. After watching this video I realized my life could have been happier and easier to manage had I known it sooner. What a treasure!
+Diana Dunnagan thank you
It makes perfect sense Kevin. Keep up the good work!
This is amazing, the way you speak is so motivating. I’m definitely going to try to change the way I think now. Thank you!
I love your approach! So refreshing & empowering!
Exactly what I needed to hear exactly at this moment . Thank you
I really love your experience sharing Kevin
I am going through a mental breakdown due to emotional abuse and silent treatment/ghosting after breakup and after he blocked me when he found out I was pregnant
🤔😕
I was in a similiar situation years ago. I am a firm believer in situations like this its best not to bring a child into. I am pro choice. Really give it some thought because this guy is ghosting you now and the baby is not yet born imagine when the child gets here. Its not worth the risk. You will be struggling as a single mom and it will be hard but not impossible. Give it some thought.
Life is life, please don't murder just because of finance. There's many people that can help you just please reach out so some. Im sorry for what happened, but a life is a right. I respect you and any other life. Thanks
Thank you Kevin! May you be blessed for helping others so wisely!
This is one of the best videos I ever saw about this topic...! Thank you!
Yes so inspirational! Thank you 💕
This is amazing info. Thank you for making this.
Awesome breakdown and awesome video!!!
THIS WAS EXCELLENT! I never heard it explained this way...💯
Absolutely brilliant information!!
Incredibly well formulated, easy to understand and makes SO MUCH sense!
Absolutely brilliant and on point ...speaks volumes
Your videos are very insightful and always helpful to me. I always look forward to hearing you.
This is really helping me. Very much what I needed to hear. Thank you so much!
Thank you. You're awesome for doing what you do - a true humanitarian.
love ur videos dude. Always feel better after watching them. Keep fighting the good fight brother!
The point made about seeking validation from others is so great. This is a tendency we had long before the narcissistic relationship, and the narcissist helped us to see how futile that strategy really is. Never again! In a way they make great teachers.
Hey thank you for your time insight and effort. I'm transitioning thru some unbelievable things and watching these videos is really helping me. I appreciate you
very thankful for your channel! great information!
Thanks for this video I've never thought of it this way but it totally spot on and a much healthier point of view ❤
Thank you! I needed this tonight. God bless you🙏🏾💕
Love this video. Excellent points made and explained. Thank you and God bless!
Thank you so much! Man you made me see something there that I hadn't seen before. Definitely helps with the healing process!
You’re always buzzing & I love it.
Thanks for the video man!