TOTAL WAR MEDIEVAL 2 IS A PERFECTLY BALANCED GAME WITH NO EXPLOITS - Assassin Only Challenge

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  • čas přidán 6. 01. 2020
  • Medieval 2 Total War Is a fantastic grand strategy game from creative assembly. It was the game to follow on from Rome Total War one of my favourite strategy games. The Total War Franchise combines elements of 4x strategy with RTS battles perfectly simulated to be historically authentic. Sadly however what if you are interested in the War side of Total War. What if instead we add an extra funny challenge to the mix! We throw war out of the window and embrace a unique form of pacifism! We attempt the Assassin Only Challenge in Medieval 2. So today The Spiffing Brit will be discovering is Medieval 2 Total War Is A Perfectly Balanced Game With No Exploits! Or If the Assassin Only Challenge is broken and potentially too much of a glitch in the game.
    This video game exploit video will be jam packed with a best bits funny moments montage style of editing similar to that of Valefisk, Robbaz and RTgame. So sit back relax and grab a cup of tea to enjoy with the spiffing brit!
    Magestic Merch: freshmerch.fm/collections/spi...
    Patreon: / spiffing
    Twitter: @thespiffingbrit
    Discord: / discord
    title: MEDIEVAL 2 TOTAL WAR IS A PERFECTLY BALANCED GAME WITH NO EXPLOITS - Assassin Only Challenge
    Last Total War Video: TOTAL WAR WARHAMMER 2 IS A PERFECTLY BALANCED GAME WITH NO EXPLOITS - Infinite Money Slave Challenge
    #funny #montage #Medieval2
  • Hry

Komentáře • 1,7K

  • @FlawedFabrications
    @FlawedFabrications Před 4 lety +1157

    tbh I'd probably hide myself in a castle and surround myself with priests if all my family members kept getting constantly and inevitably assassinated too

    • @MrEshah
      @MrEshah Před 4 lety +64

      I think the AI was holding a lovely coronation for the new king. Probably thought it to be nice to give the poor bastard a nice send off party.

    • @endo4137
      @endo4137 Před 4 lety +16

      But the assassin would be disguised as a priest!

    • @BlueVegasCourier
      @BlueVegasCourier Před 4 lety +23

      Granted, one out of 20 priests protecting you is an assassin

    • @spynyi
      @spynyi Před 4 lety +8

      But what if the one being protected is the assassin?

    • @elysium7242
      @elysium7242 Před 4 lety +6

      *Confused Milanese noises*

  • @th3highwayman
    @th3highwayman Před 4 lety +1259

    "My lord, the King has died. You are to become King."
    "No, no, oh god, no!"

  • @wotwott2319
    @wotwott2319 Před 4 lety +1160

    Spiff: "I'm going to assassinate the entire royal family of the Milanese"
    Milan: *aggressively makes so many babies so that spiff can never assassinate them all*

    • @slashshooter003
      @slashshooter003 Před 4 lety +70

      Well, I guess the Milanese (AI) is... "Productively" aggresive. =)

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 Před 4 lety +28

      Hello there citizen of the mighty British empire I need u to assassinate a milanese head of state

    • @Elyseon
      @Elyseon Před 4 lety +12

      Fuckers...

    • @hetecks1385
      @hetecks1385 Před 4 lety +4

      @@bruhdude2725 oh
      I'm from a time that there's a thing called "peace" in the world

    • @Drebolaskan
      @Drebolaskan Před 4 lety +17

      @@hetecks1385 Don't make me send my assassin in after you

  • @sockmonkey1994
    @sockmonkey1994 Před 4 lety +889

    Advisor: Every noble is being assassinated when they go out, what should we do?
    The King: You're right, a brisk walk through the market does sound nice

    • @jimijokela6053
      @jimijokela6053 Před 4 lety +103

      Advisor: Doesn't that make you easier to assassinate
      The King: Don't be silly. It's the nobles that are being assassinated, not kings.

    • @whoareyouyouareclearlylost323
      @whoareyouyouareclearlylost323 Před 4 lety +11

      @@jimijokela6053 lol

    • @dk-sky3820
      @dk-sky3820 Před 4 lety +45

      The King: Don't worry about my protection, that's what 100 ballistas are for.

  • @JohnDoe-ds8um
    @JohnDoe-ds8um Před 4 lety +693

    "The opening move is just stealing things from France"
    Ah, the time old English strategy

  • @AsianPersuation24x7
    @AsianPersuation24x7 Před 4 lety +1911

    If your on a boat and that somehow makes you IMMUME to assassins they obviously haven’t played Skyrim...

    • @TheMordpheus
      @TheMordpheus Před 4 lety +139

      or watched the Trailer from Witcher II Assassins of Kings .... Spoiler Kings are dying!

    • @Pienimusta
      @Pienimusta Před 4 lety +18

      or Witcher 2

    • @fatrobin72
      @fatrobin72 Před 4 lety +18

      well since Skyrim was barely a twinkle in Todd Howards eye when this came out... the same year as Oblivion...
      as for the "what about Witcher 2" peeps... well since the staff of CD Project Red were possibly playing this game when polishing the gem (or was it PC stress test) that was The Witcher (1) I am sure those Tim travelling masters of CA had seen that scene and disagreed heavily with it when deciding that this game would have the glorious feature (technical term) that boats were not places for assassinations

    • @teaappreciationindividual505
      @teaappreciationindividual505 Před 4 lety +6

      Someone clearly should have told Titus Mede that the tactics that he played were for the wrong game

    • @TheArklyte
      @TheArklyte Před 4 lety +1

      Boat? Assassins? *[Laughs in P-38G]* The only place we have not assassinated anyone is space. _Yet..._

  • @JARiS1005
    @JARiS1005 Před 4 lety +1028

    This game is worthy of a remaster. We need it upgraded.

    • @bakersmileyface
      @bakersmileyface Před 4 lety +82

      Medieval 3 would be great too.

    • @JARiS1005
      @JARiS1005 Před 3 lety +23

      @Crawling Chaos it's heavily outdated and unoptimized. I'm sure you can appreciate a more polished experience with the same mechanics.

    • @ahappybadger302
      @ahappybadger302 Před 3 lety +52

      @@JARiS1005 If CA just optimizes it better and just add better grahphics then it will be perfect. I don't want anyting fancy new to be added tbh

    • @Axelerati0n
      @Axelerati0n Před 3 lety +31

      @@ahappybadger302 Yeah, the AI could use a serious revamp as well. Their diplomatic behaviour is sometimes outright nonsensical. Like Denmark sieging my english cities when my empire is the entirety of the British Isles and the whole atlantic/north sea coastline from Antwerp to Leon, with marriage alliances with France, HRE and Poland, perfect relations with the pope and my cardinal in the papal throne. You could have taken the trade rights and thrived, Danes, but no, you had to expand west and now you get excommunicated, have a crusade called on your capital and now you get gang-raped from every direction by all christian nations at once, good job AI!
      Other than that I have always loved the game, there are just so many viable strategies and unpredictable events which guarantee that no two campaigns are ever the same. I still enjoy it to this day.

    • @theanglo-lithuanian1768
      @theanglo-lithuanian1768 Před 3 lety +3

      1212 ad mos is pretty good

  • @jovandimitrijekolaric2549
    @jovandimitrijekolaric2549 Před 4 lety +292

    France - France
    Germany - Germany
    Balkans - that region over there

  • @benangell1403
    @benangell1403 Před 4 lety +401

    "Its as easy as that" says Sir Spiff after save scumming throughout the entire episode...🤣

    • @Da_Shark
      @Da_Shark Před 4 lety +58

      Perfectly balanced time travel you mean

    • @benangell1403
      @benangell1403 Před 4 lety +6

      Roberts though the almighty power of Yorkshire Tea!

    • @aidenpons9584
      @aidenpons9584 Před 4 lety +12

      The really fun part is lategame when you have 20 assassins you don't even need to savescum, your chances are just so high and you can take the occasional loss!

    • @lynarisevershadeshadowfall1684
      @lynarisevershadeshadowfall1684 Před 4 lety

      Worst part is you can just go to the files and unlock the factions, it's super easy, but longer videos more revenue I guess. :3

    • @aidenpons9584
      @aidenpons9584 Před 4 lety +23

      @@lynarisevershadeshadowfall1684 Well, if you were watching Spiff for the actual technical exploits you're possibly watching the wrong channel or should watch at 2x speed. I watch Spiff for THE GLORY OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE, the shameless plugs of the blessing that is Yorkshire Tea, and generall Spifcrackery. :P

  • @oliverjones1000
    @oliverjones1000 Před 4 lety +514

    Enemy lord: why, why do I feel like this man has tried to kill me before
    Spiffing: this... is requiem

    • @ChosenInvisiball
      @ChosenInvisiball Před 4 lety +28

      @@thespiffingbrit That's what she said

    • @imperialguardsmen9491
      @imperialguardsmen9491 Před 4 lety +4

      Oh how the turn tables

    • @madafaka2666
      @madafaka2666 Před 4 lety +18

      He also said Venice instead of Venezia, I hear angry ice noises coming this way!

    • @oliverjones1000
      @oliverjones1000 Před 4 lety +2

      @@madafaka2666 WRRRRYYYY

    • @PobortzaPl
      @PobortzaPl Před 4 lety +4

      @@thespiffingbrit Milanese should had been spawning with "paranoid" trait.

  • @HiddenInTheTruth
    @HiddenInTheTruth Před 2 lety +315

    He clearly thought the nobility was cursed with all the random accidental deaths and weird timeline issues so he surrounded himself with priests to try and ward the evil spirits. Didn't work but good effort anyway.

  • @Cybermat47
    @Cybermat47 Před 2 lety +186

    Spiff: ‘You can unlock a faction just by killing all their family members!’
    M2TW: ‘nah’

  • @PenguinWithInternetAccess
    @PenguinWithInternetAccess Před 4 lety +703

    The only thing I like to do in this game is create gigantic armies led by bots and watch them fight with the Lord of the rings music playing ominously in the background

    • @ThePiranha77
      @ThePiranha77 Před 4 lety +78

      May I introduce you to a mod called Third Age total war? Its literally that but with fully changed map and units to the whole middle earth :D and if you want even better go for the divide and conquer submod of third age which is developed still and expands game so much

    • @h0llygh0st
      @h0llygh0st Před 4 lety +12

      @@ThePiranha77 This is one of the best mods I've ever played, shame no big CZcamsrs have picked up on it yet.

    • @AraAraMedia
      @AraAraMedia Před 4 lety +1

      @@h0llygh0st Big total war youtubers play the 3rd age mod a lot?

    • @colleyflower7408
      @colleyflower7408 Před 4 lety +3

      @@h0llygh0st Pixelated Apollo and LegendOfTotalWar dont count?

    • @kchgamer1788
      @kchgamer1788 Před 4 lety +4

      h0llygh0st look into the total war CZcamsr community. Pixelated Apollo, JackiFish, lion heart, they all play Third age.

  • @BlackWolf18C
    @BlackWolf18C Před 4 lety +541

    Royal guards: "You there!"
    Peasant farmer: "Me, sir?"
    Royal guard: "Yes, you. You're the King now. Congratulations."
    Spiff's assassin: Poison dart!
    Royal guards: "Oh no! The King is dead! Quick, find his son!"
    Spiff's assassin: "New target acquired."

    • @a5-806
      @a5-806 Před 4 lety +6

      LOL

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 Před 4 lety +7

      Soory I'm going to have to stop you now you should go and pay tax

    • @joshuablackmon939
      @joshuablackmon939 Před 3 lety

      This made me laugh

    • @conan2096
      @conan2096 Před 3 lety

      poor hugh is getting some serious tennis elbow from all that stabbing.

  • @TheSecondPersona
    @TheSecondPersona Před rokem +97

    18:40
    Loading screen: "No one conquers who doesn't fight."
    Spiff: Hold my tea.

  • @malek0093
    @malek0093 Před 4 lety +70

    6:55 "If you are on a boat, you're immortal to assassins"
    Letho from The Witcher 2 would like a word with you

  • @kennethpeterson7524
    @kennethpeterson7524 Před 4 lety +213

    "Why do they have so many family members? Where do they keep coming from?"
    Well, you see Spiffing, when a mommy and a daddy love each very much, the wrestle naked, and nine months later a bird gives them a baby. I don't know where the birds get the babies, that is just one of life's great mysteries.

    • @Greninjia
      @Greninjia Před 4 lety +4

      @@thespiffingbrit I think they teleported into the nether tbh

    • @atocanboi409
      @atocanboi409 Před 4 lety +11

      @@thespiffingbrit they have such an overpowered nation they could spawn in family members through a time portal

    • @maxhutto3056
      @maxhutto3056 Před 4 lety +13

      Actually their reproduction rate is normal, the mothers just give birth to full grown adults.

    • @atocanboi409
      @atocanboi409 Před 4 lety +8

      @@maxhutto3056 I'm not going to think about it too much

    • @Fopalope
      @Fopalope Před 4 lety +5

      So medieval 2 for both the player and the AI attempts to give factions as many family members as you have cities, so the game gives you adoption offers to bring new generals into the family, though the AI will go past this cap because ya know AI cheats

  • @gismogy
    @gismogy Před 4 lety +428

    Total war be like : Im going to send a big army to destroy you!!!
    Meanwhile
    Spiffing : here have a knife in your back

    • @AfferbeckBeats
      @AfferbeckBeats Před 4 lety +3

      Also works the other way around. Mwahaha I have my doom stacks all ready to go. Next ten turns surrounded by three different factions agents: general wounded, army halted, general assassinated, army poisoned, can't move because it's winter and you'll lose half your men...

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 Před 4 lety +1

      Hello Im going to have to tax you unless you serve the empire by assassinating a Iranian general

  • @Mechabang
    @Mechabang Před 2 lety +25

    Spiffing Brit: I'm going to assassinate all of the Milan nobility!
    Milan: Jokes on you, we're Catholic!

  • @krischan67
    @krischan67 Před 4 lety +38

    Actually, if you just reload the same savegame again and again, the second assination attempt will lead to the same result all the time, i.e. if you fail at the second try, all susequent attempts at the particular target will fail as well (except you have multiple assassins and try a defferent order of attempts). In order to balance this unfair glitch, you have to save the game again right after reloading, but before trying again. That way, the random number generator will generate different values next time and lead to yet another new chance, in case the second attempt fails as well. In that manner, you can have infinitely many attempts.

  • @Force2reckonVods
    @Force2reckonVods Před 4 lety +2184

    "Sorry, we missed the target, you had a 95% chance to hit him"
    Sorry, when did we go back to playing XCom?
    Edit: *psst* guys we're only 200 ish likes away from spiffs comment, you should totally like this so we can take over :3c

    • @aidangame
      @aidangame Před 4 lety +102

      *PTSD INTENSIFIES*

    • @lawrencecole6527
      @lawrencecole6527 Před 4 lety +2

      Hahaha =D

    • @sithlord5149
      @sithlord5149 Před 4 lety +34

      XCOM be like that you stand right next to the alien and you still miss

    • @singleplayermoments
      @singleplayermoments Před 4 lety +15

      Oh dear, looks like XCOM isn’t the only game that punishes Spiff for exploiting them.

    • @Force2reckonVods
      @Force2reckonVods Před 4 lety +7

      @@sithlord5149 Over 500 hours in New XCom/Xcom 2 and as much in old XCom's. It do be like that.

  • @oliverwalker5692
    @oliverwalker5692 Před 4 lety +288

    "Making gold as Milan is about as easy as trying to get Denmark to capitulate"
    *Bokoen wants to know your location*

    • @esbech
      @esbech Před 4 lety +34

      As a Dane I do not appreciate that joke, we do not capitulate that easi... Well okay we do, but still!

    • @xshadow2042
      @xshadow2042 Před 4 lety +1

      the snakey sneaky way

    • @bubbasbigblast8563
      @bubbasbigblast8563 Před 4 lety +7

      @@esbech What you should really be ashamed of is losing the race to form the first viable Scandinavian kingdom to bloody Norway of all places. Norway! Did you all get lost looking at the fjords or something?

    • @lucasbeck1391
      @lucasbeck1391 Před 4 lety +3

      @@bubbasbigblast8563 no we were busy farming with our flat plains and rivers

    • @FrobergDK
      @FrobergDK Před 4 lety +2

      @098765 Craper 4. And years of resistance.

  • @garretteverett2613
    @garretteverett2613 Před 2 lety +8

    As a rule-follower who feels bound to play fairly and with historical accuracy in this kind of game, it's an absolute delight to hear you say things like "It's going to take a lot of attempts and a large amount of reloading but we ARE going to murder this man".
    I've also realized through watching your videos of Total War and older RTS games that there was a reason that I, an internet-less peasant, was always destroyed at LAN parties by my friends who had internet access at home. There was no way any of us would have been able to figure out some of these exploits without outside help.

  • @jlcburr
    @jlcburr Před 4 lety +16

    Ah yes, I've done the assassin exploit many times myself. I surrounded Rome with assassins who proceeded to take out the Pope, then his replacement, then the next replacement, and so on. Must've gone through about 30 popes just for the hell of it.

    • @tigerwarrior1787
      @tigerwarrior1787 Před 2 lety +3

      Papal Guard: "YOU THERE! YOU'RE THE EMERGENCY NEW POPE!"
      Assassin: *Rock*
      Papal Guard: "Ah crapbaskets..." *Sees Cardinal* "YOU THERE!!!"
      Assassin: "Aren't I supposed to be getting paid to do this?"

  • @llbrainjoker5742
    @llbrainjoker5742 Před 4 lety +166

    The Spifing Brit is a perfectly balanced channel.

    • @METALFREAK03
      @METALFREAK03 Před 4 lety +18

      @@thespiffingbrit this is a perfectly balanced reply

    • @wesleycowan363
      @wesleycowan363 Před 4 lety +14

      This is a perfectly balanced comment chain.

    • @michaelmaclean9739
      @michaelmaclean9739 Před 4 lety +13

      @@wesleycowan363 that was a perfectly balanced observation

    • @mitsvanmitsvanio6106
      @mitsvanmitsvanio6106 Před 4 lety +12

      that was a perfectly balanced opinion

    • @blunderingfool
      @blunderingfool Před 4 lety +6

      @@mitsvanmitsvanio6106 That was a horrendously balanced statement.

  • @SoullessCast
    @SoullessCast Před 4 lety +106

    Only after watching Spiff on the Yogs streams so much have I realized just how much deeper he pushes his voice for these videos XD

    • @jacobellinger8027
      @jacobellinger8027 Před 4 lety +1

      It's post editing that does this

    • @bl4cksp1d3r
      @bl4cksp1d3r Před 4 lety +21

      @@jacobellinger8027 that's.... that's not how editing works. You can clearly hear when he's doing deeper voice and higher voice. People can deepen their voice you know

    • @KingofJ95
      @KingofJ95 Před 4 lety +14

      @@jacobellinger8027 That's... One of the dumber things I've heard today...

    • @bl4cksp1d3r
      @bl4cksp1d3r Před 4 lety +1

      @S F "looks like". Ask Spiff if you want to know. Give me a proof please ^_^

    • @andrewstepanek8933
      @andrewstepanek8933 Před 4 lety +1

      @@bl4cksp1d3r Do you think he narrates everything live?

  • @theanarchonazbolinquisition

    Spiff gives a new meaning to save-scumming

  • @KazeNilrem
    @KazeNilrem Před 2 lety +39

    I get the feeling that the game had been fighting back against all the assassinations. Tug of war between them and the game populating new heirs. Other than changing the file, I do feel like the game came out as the victor.

    • @rubenheymans1988
      @rubenheymans1988 Před 11 měsíci

      that's by default , at least a faction heir and leader , you have to kill them both

  • @ricktickb00m
    @ricktickb00m Před 4 lety +151

    "38% of the time, it works every time..."

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 Před 4 lety +5

      Shhhh don't worry take tea...
      He knows to much activate 28% chance

  • @glenngriffon8032
    @glenngriffon8032 Před 4 lety +128

    TW: If someone is on a boat they are immune to assassins.
    Edward Kenway wishes to know your location.

    • @lucasbeck1391
      @lucasbeck1391 Před 4 lety +2

      Didn't you play ac3?
      Haytham survived

    • @HandsomeGamerGuy
      @HandsomeGamerGuy Před 4 lety

      @@lucasbeck1391 And yet Edward died. And Haythem died too

    • @MechWarrior894
      @MechWarrior894 Před 4 lety

      I mean, it's kind of hard to sneak up on a boat at sea.

    • @sekliley7587
      @sekliley7587 Před 4 lety

      I forget, but was Edward an assassin?

    • @joltyjivs1518
      @joltyjivs1518 Před 2 lety

      @@sekliley7587 no he was not he just worked with them.

  • @darklink604
    @darklink604 Před 4 lety +44

    Spiffing Brit: Give peace a chance.
    Dark brotherhood: We gonna need more blades aren't we?

  • @frisianmouve
    @frisianmouve Před 4 lety +75

    Milanese king: you over there! you're my son now, I'm going to adopt you!
    Nonono, please have mercy my lord, I still have so much to live for.
    King gets stabbed, congratulations you're the king! Alright as my first decree I'm going to adopt that random peasant over there because I don't like the way he looks at me, king sips on poisoned wine, guards get that peasant that's running away he's the king now!

  • @APocketMonster
    @APocketMonster Před 4 lety +60

    After watching this...I'd LOVE to see Spiff play Fire Emblem xD
    "How do you miss a 95%?" *resets*

    • @baseballjustin5
      @baseballjustin5 Před 4 lety +5

      Or Xcom...

    • @asuragaming6671
      @asuragaming6671 Před 4 lety +7

      @@baseballjustin5 hes done xcom. One of his more recent videos actually

    • @frknspacewizardbrett6044
      @frknspacewizardbrett6044 Před 4 lety +1

      _Gets blank level up_
      "How did you even manage that?" *restarts chapter*

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 Před 4 lety

      After seeing you I would love to see you pay tax

    • @skeletonwar4445
      @skeletonwar4445 Před 4 lety

      @@frknspacewizardbrett6044 At least in Three Houses you can just go back in time and do a different action to change the rng.

  • @keizervanenerc5180
    @keizervanenerc5180 Před 4 lety +149

    Next: Pikeman are perfectly balanced in Rome Total War

    • @bl4cksp1d3r
      @bl4cksp1d3r Před 4 lety +27

      Defending towns against basically anything with militia pikemen 👌

    • @huckthatdish
      @huckthatdish Před 4 lety +11

      Still OP but they are annoying as shit when you are on the offensive thanks to the uh... creative path finding in Rome Total War. But on the open field pikes + archers + a bit of cavalry to spice things up on the flanks is a guaranteed win.

    • @Jungstertag
      @Jungstertag Před 4 lety +7

      Anyone seen that bridge exploit where they charge into your phalanx without even fighting and instantly die?

    • @radoslawpiotrpaszek3257
      @radoslawpiotrpaszek3257 Před 4 lety +7

      Pikemen have poor stats, what you need however are greek armoured hoplites who have ridicoulously high stats and you get very fast access to them, in I believe 5 turn. After that none of the faction can conquer your cities.

    • @cerdi_99
      @cerdi_99 Před 4 lety +1

      i remember playing as egypt and omg hoplites do be like that

  • @ShAd0w0100
    @ShAd0w0100 Před rokem +2

    Ah, Medival II: Total War...
    My first introduction to the balanced art of savescumming.

  • @Markfr0mCanada
    @Markfr0mCanada Před 4 lety +166

    And this is why game developers started developing anti-save scum mechanics.

    • @Rookiebatman
      @Rookiebatman Před 4 lety +48

      I've only watched a few videos from this channel so far, so I don't know if the savespamming is a regular thing, but I kinda feel like it defeats the whole purpose. Wouldn't practically every game be completely broken if you just used save scum?

    • @dmyt58
      @dmyt58 Před 4 lety +29

      @@Rookiebatman this game is kinda broken anyway. As milan you can get 30 cities by turns 30 without using any exploits. Turn 1 capture Venice, buy bologna, capture Florence. turn 2 was Marseille and the Island fortress.
      For Venice just send 1 general, 1 spear and 1 mailed knight and besiege. AI will attack since their force is stronger but you can simply defeat them. and get the city. Similar tactics in use for other cities. Bologna only cost like 2-3 grand so its pretty cheap + free units.

    • @dmyt58
      @dmyt58 Před 4 lety +1

      @Alvi Syahri Dont think so but i havent played anything except legendary in ages

    • @joa65
      @joa65 Před 4 lety

      @@Rookiebatman Agreed.

    • @joa65
      @joa65 Před 4 lety +7

      @@dmyt58 Could be, but that guy dosen't show such mechanic, just lame save scumming.

  • @yamatoclassmusashi8830
    @yamatoclassmusashi8830 Před 4 lety +56

    Nobleman: *Exists*
    Assassins: "Its free real-estate."

  • @joeykrack42
    @joeykrack42 Před 2 lety +27

    Still one of my favorite games ever, and I actually ran a Venetian campaign yesterday lol.

    • @revolutionishere
      @revolutionishere Před rokem

      The beginning for me is always ridiculously hard, so many rivals at home and abroad.

  • @engineeringtehmetals
    @engineeringtehmetals Před 4 lety +1

    I absolutely love watching you play these strategy war games that take place in Europe & the world!

  • @DominusRexDK
    @DominusRexDK Před 4 lety +57

    "Making gold as Milan is about as easy as trying to get Denmark to capitulate"
    I feel mildly offended now.

    • @aliasunknown4879
      @aliasunknown4879 Před 4 lety +4

      But is he wrong?

    • @christiankongsted5084
      @christiankongsted5084 Před 4 lety +1

      I feel fiercly offended. >:(

    • @vincentmalasawmkimajongte7489
      @vincentmalasawmkimajongte7489 Před 3 lety +1

      Denmark has enough armour piercing to hold off an entire panzer division.

    • @Citiy3
      @Citiy3 Před 3 lety

      Well as a Dane i am mildly offended but it is not like he is wrong Denmark hasn't officialy forught back since the 1900-century not counting the 2100-century

  • @RobbieCargilly
    @RobbieCargilly Před 4 lety +7

    The Slough drop was so good :D

  • @dexybrd3280
    @dexybrd3280 Před 4 lety +51

    When you had few Generals, you had a chance to adopt a General, and they become a family member which is why so many kept popping up for you.

    • @nigredoooalgown6245
      @nigredoooalgown6245 Před 4 lety +3

      have not had....

    • @kingssorrow32
      @kingssorrow32 Před 4 lety +1

      @@nigredoooalgown6245 technically this video was uploaded in the past, making had, not have, correct.

    • @kingssorrow32
      @kingssorrow32 Před 4 lety

      @@nigredoooalgown6245 though he could have used a descriptive word before few, for example "when you had very few generals"
      To make the sentence more appealing

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 Před 4 lety

      Why attack a country when you can sell them opium now pay your opium tax

    • @skeletonwar4445
      @skeletonwar4445 Před 4 lety

      @@kingssorrow32 When talking about a book or movie (this video counting the same as a movie in this case) you use present.
      Also the comment was about the situation of the AI enemy, explaining why they had so many family members all the time, not Spiff's own situation.

  • @williamsessions4110
    @williamsessions4110 Před 3 lety

    These old total war videos are superb, so amusing! I'm ordering some Yorkshire tea!

  • @lawrencecole6527
    @lawrencecole6527 Před 4 lety

    Dude I love your videos. Only a few select friends enjoyed to break games as you do. Fun stuff.

  • @martincooper8289
    @martincooper8289 Před 4 lety +57

    What you don't see:
    The ridiculous amount of time taken to save/load total war games. Would definitely be easier to play properly xD Great vid though.

    • @ironman2818
      @ironman2818 Před 4 lety

      There's a hot key for both that you can use mid cutscene so it's actually as fast as your PC can reload the game. I don't remember what they are off the top of my head

    • @martincooper8289
      @martincooper8289 Před 4 lety +2

      @@ironman2818 Ah cool, didn't know that to be fair, but I think total war games in general are usually slower at loading than other games if the pc was kept the same kinda thing, even like more graphical games, I think probably because it has to like load like so much data, the positions of all armies, what units are in them, what everything belongs to, all unit healths/xp's, as well as all of the graphical stuff.
      I don't really know why actually I'm just trying to justify it on behalf of CA (for some reason?). If you have a supercomputer you can ignore my comment. But I think if you tried some side by side testing, or just played a lot of Total War (as I do) you'd know what I mean.

    • @martincooper8289
      @martincooper8289 Před 4 lety

      Ngl, even though I have Total War Medieval 2 collection on steam it's not actually installed so I can't compare with a high end computer using it (as to what I remember it being like) but Spiff does look like he was loading really fast, when I play TWWH2 these days it's still painful how long it takes with a good pc.

    • @Userius1
      @Userius1 Před 4 lety

      @@martincooper8289 Rome 1 and Med 2 load almost instantly on any modern pc, low or high end.

    • @LilithNerevarine
      @LilithNerevarine Před 4 lety

      its pretty fast now, especially if installed on ssd

  • @AsianPersuation24x7
    @AsianPersuation24x7 Před 4 lety +35

    My favorite part is when he said: “Fantastic!”

  • @Dumpweed79
    @Dumpweed79 Před 4 lety

    I really appreciate your stuff spiff. There are some hilarious cheesy ways to play games out there, so go get 'em all :-D

  • @Yakkahboo
    @Yakkahboo Před 4 lety +61

    When this started I was like, "Im just boring I'd just unlock in the game files" so after watching the glorious downfall of Milan and Scotland Im glad to see that the game didnt let me down and required the stupid unlock anyways.
    Anyways, next, play as the Papal States!

    • @Damo2690
      @Damo2690 Před 4 lety +4

      Papal states are legit broken for a player

  • @jamesglovecrazy
    @jamesglovecrazy Před 4 lety +5

    Congrats on 1M subs man! I love your content! ❤️

  • @dominicperez3777
    @dominicperez3777 Před 4 lety +74

    > Am into 20 minutes of this video
    > Realizes: "Hey, shouldn't you formally declare war on Milan and then do the assassinations?" 🤔
    > This happens: 21:02

    • @KGPeiper
      @KGPeiper Před 4 lety +2

      Yeah, the same thing with Scotland

  • @jacobtautges7371
    @jacobtautges7371 Před 4 lety

    Lord Spiff, you stupendous mad man! You’ve gone and played my favorite game! And best of all, you’ve shown us how to defeat the MONGOL HORDE instantaneously!
    Thank you for your service to Her Majesty’s Empire.

  • @regglesg3599
    @regglesg3599 Před 4 lety

    Literally waiting for this ever since I discovered your channel, thanks!

  • @friedmule5403
    @friedmule5403 Před 4 lety +3

    23:07 LOL from Denmark! Great humor and true WWII fact:-)

  • @DauntlessAdonis
    @DauntlessAdonis Před 4 lety +37

    *public service announcement*
    " Remeber to be drinking your warm cup of tea everyone!"

    • @commandantkotin
      @commandantkotin Před 4 lety +2

      Or prepare for the consequences

    • @Da_Shark
      @Da_Shark Před 4 lety +1

      I'm afraid warm is not an option here in Canada

    • @bruhdude2725
      @bruhdude2725 Před 4 lety +1

      And remember to pay your tea tax

  • @luziferiii
    @luziferiii Před 4 lety

    keep playing such lovely war games!
    they just r my favorite ones of all time!

  • @asdasdasdora
    @asdasdasdora Před 4 lety +38

    Honestly, playing the game as intended would be easier and MUCH less tedious, than continuously searching for the enemy faction members and reloading the game hundreds of times.

    • @jumbo4billion
      @jumbo4billion Před 4 lety +2

      It's more fun like this. All the total war games can be beaten using exactly the same formation and tactics for every battle.

    • @asdasdasdora
      @asdasdasdora Před 4 lety +12

      @@jumbo4billion It doesn't look like he's having much fun tho

    • @muglypunt968
      @muglypunt968 Před 3 lety +4

      Lol who plays total war for fun

  • @timetraveller7294
    @timetraveller7294 Před 4 lety +16

    this reminds me of the one campaign in which the last Scottish nobleman died in a thunder storm near Edinburgh, balanced weather events xD

    • @timetraveller7294
      @timetraveller7294 Před 4 lety

      @The Nova renaissance yeah, the game has some weather effects/events happening randomly...
      like erupting volcano, floods and storms. they can damage your army or in my case, kill the leader of a nation without a heir xD

  • @timothybartlett5493
    @timothybartlett5493 Před 4 lety +5

    I just wanted to let you know that I had my first cup of Yorkshire tea yesterday, and it was a most excellent brew. Hats off to you good sir, and keep creating more quality content! :D

  • @davood123
    @davood123 Před 3 lety +1

    you make the most scuffed looking games sound fun
    keep on drinking that tea

  • @dopellamaz2216
    @dopellamaz2216 Před 4 lety

    Just started watching your videos and let me just say.. top notch. It’s funny and interesting and I’ve subscribed and liked already. Please do a Rome Total war vid!

  • @Dr4wfox
    @Dr4wfox Před 4 lety +3

    That assassin had a X-com training at missing with 95% chance.

  • @permeus2nd
    @permeus2nd Před 4 lety +4

    With how fast their realities are dropping it’s no wonder he was surrounded by priests, he knew it was only a matter of time.

  • @zubbworks
    @zubbworks Před 4 lety +2

    Me and my friend Swilly Gym did this once.
    The Pope had soooo many assasins around his city at all times.
    They put the crown on the new pope's head, BAM!, crossbow bolt.

  • @poofa4009
    @poofa4009 Před 4 lety +2

    Why is this better then a lot of recent games? Like, I want assassination cutscenes!

  • @kmpgos4158
    @kmpgos4158 Před 4 lety +24

    May I suggest taking on "Fire Emblem: Three Houses."
    Not only it has so many mechanics that there must be a way to exploit them, but one of the core mechanics of this game are tea parties. You can both try to break the game and have tea with all students as much as you want. It's win win.

    • @AtomicArtumas
      @AtomicArtumas Před 4 lety

      I mean, honestly, if you want to just faceroll the game just play on normal, recruit and train Lysithea, then laugh as she solos everything as a 20/20/20.
      Or Catherine
      Or.... really anyone, technically.
      As far as actual exploits go though, I'd honestly be kinda amazed if you could actually find one.
      Only "real" exploit I know of is FE7's "take control of the enemy team via a mine" glitch and then trading Vaida's OP spear to a unit that drops their item so you can get the OP spear.

  • @blackblood6478
    @blackblood6478 Před 4 lety +6

    and thats the power of save scumming

  • @MatrixExpress
    @MatrixExpress Před 4 lety

    Here for the tea, nice history lesson too

  • @thesiixth7770
    @thesiixth7770 Před 2 lety +3

    I bought this game back in 2006 and didnt kno what was goin on and took it back and picked up the original mount and blade for the first time . Years later im now playing Rome 2 and Bannerlord bc of that one day

    • @owen4108
      @owen4108 Před rokem

      Sounds like a huge W ngl

  • @maxerd
    @maxerd Před 4 lety +3

    I've found out about the save and load glitch myself so happy ur finally doing it xD

  • @oddpoppetesq.3467
    @oddpoppetesq.3467 Před 4 lety +24

    I love the fact this came out now, right after someone gets assassinated and total war nearly breaks out 🤣🤣
    Spiff: *Give peace a chance*

  • @drandana3661
    @drandana3661 Před 4 lety

    Yeeeesssssssssssss. Great game. Love it when you do the total war series

  • @weareharbinger914
    @weareharbinger914 Před 4 lety

    This reminds me a lot of how i played shogun, ninjas were dope. And the chosokube archers combined with ninjas who had firebombs made for great guerilla forces.

  • @armsofundertow98
    @armsofundertow98 Před 2 lety +6

    Really hope you make another medieval 2 video someday.

  • @bastianstiefler3390
    @bastianstiefler3390 Před 4 lety +21

    Haven't seen it yet, but I know my like will be well placed!

  • @doriannawrocki1834
    @doriannawrocki1834 Před 3 lety

    Im really enjoying your Challange videos, pls make more

  • @RoaringEgg
    @RoaringEgg Před 4 lety

    More total war videos! There so fun to watch!

  • @PanzerShrek94
    @PanzerShrek94 Před 2 lety +5

    Prepares to throw dagger at the king
    some pesky woman sees and screams
    throws the dagger at the woman and run off

  • @bruhhhhmoment4848
    @bruhhhhmoment4848 Před rokem +3

    I wish they had these animations in other total war games I wanna see my spy dump British tea like it's 1773

  • @russfinnerty8202
    @russfinnerty8202 Před 4 lety

    Marvelous, brilliant and wonderful you are Spiffing Brit, cant fault you if i tried. Specifically enjoyed the nostalgia of sid meriers pirates and oblivion. Its a real treat.
    Would love to see an exploited black and white 2 or perhaps even bookworm adventures, really hone in on the more dated games.

  • @maloneyf89
    @maloneyf89 Před 4 lety +2

    As always, great video. I keep hoping to see an Anno1800 video. You did an Anno video for the previous game (16 something?) and mentioned you were thinking about doing one for Anno 1800.

  • @TheHuskyFamily
    @TheHuskyFamily Před 2 lety +21

    still the best total war game... i hope there will be a medieval tw3, where only AI/visuals/diplomacy stuff is fixed,

  • @theinformationstation5328

    I’ve just started watching the video and I’m so pumped to see this cause I’ve killed oh so many factions with targeted attacks and assassinations against enemy family members.
    Edit: I kinda object to this particular method. Save scumming is particularly egregious.

  • @robwri9544
    @robwri9544 Před 3 lety

    My favourite TW exploit worked in Rome TW. Not sure about the others. I was struggling as a minor faction until I worked out that I could defend a huge castle with just two units of archers. A huge Roman army would lay siege and, having the cockiness of an army which outnumbered me 10 to 1, they would attack. How it works is this, you set fire to any battering rams they have, then you take your archers way off along the walls and they stop for a cup of tea. The enemy army swarm up ladders, open the main gate and flood in. Give them a minute or so to slowly march to the empty town square then move the archers back to the gate, capturing and closing it. The enemy is now completely trapped and the AI adopts the posture of a rabbit in a car's headlights. From here either the clock runs down or the towers with inexhaustible supplies of arrows cut them to shreds while they do absolutely nothing.

  • @PokemonButcher
    @PokemonButcher Před 4 lety

    I am including this in the D&D campaign I have been planning. Just think of it: A nation that had no armies, only assassins. Rather than diverting superfluous resources into training and sustaining a war machine, they needed only to invest their efforts in a few gifted specialists. They conquered anything they put their mind to through cunning, deceit, manipulation, subterfuge, stealth, and relentless, silent strikes from the dark, without ever fighting a battle. Once all leaders and their subsequent replacements were removed from a target nation, that nation's society fell into chaos. Then, the assassin-nation (ha) would put one of their own in the seat of power. It just makes sense!

  • @molybdaen11
    @molybdaen11 Před 4 lety +3

    I am not even mad of all the reloading. Because I can see the amazing citations once again.

  • @IronOreAgate
    @IronOreAgate Před 4 lety +3

    This makes me wanna see you play Lords of the Realm 2. One of the greatest medieval strategy games of its day.

  • @editingdude122
    @editingdude122 Před 2 lety +1

    One of the greatest strategy games of all time, and the greatest mods to match it too.

  • @daniellipko710
    @daniellipko710 Před 3 lety +1

    That assassin save-load is how I defeated the Mongols and Timurids in my Russia campaign.
    I also used it in my Venice campaign to make sure my priests always became Pope, and then those Popes died to be replaced with new Venetian popes whenever they grew to despise me.
    Then there was that curious circumstance where a Russian general of mine was bribed by the Portuguese, and somehow ended up as their King. When my scorned Grand Duke landed on the shores of Portugal fresh from conquering Britain, he initiated his invasion with the assassination of their traitorous Russian king.
    I love assassins

  • @smcasas9367
    @smcasas9367 Před 3 lety +5

    Remember Legendary Geishas in Shogun TW? Now that was an overpowered unit.

  • @totalwar1793
    @totalwar1793 Před 4 lety +8

    LegendOfTotalWar: Hold my beer

  • @robertjovanovic4873
    @robertjovanovic4873 Před 4 lety

    12:58 that middle of nowhere is where i come from, but you are still right

  • @ROLLOVER48
    @ROLLOVER48 Před 4 lety

    Woah, the whitehouse really took that assassinate your enemies thing to heart

  • @ontaka5997
    @ontaka5997 Před 2 lety +10

    The only issue I had with this game is that only family members could become generals.
    Other than that, it was great fun!
    I burnt tons of hours playing this game.

    • @antonkrieg3708
      @antonkrieg3708 Před rokem +2

      If a captain wins a heroic or lopsided victory he could be "man of the hour" and get promoted that way.

  • @DynamicProGamer
    @DynamicProGamer Před 4 lety +7

    I feel like this isn't really an exploit and really isn't unbalanced either, all you're doing is reloading when you don't get the outcome you want. You can do that in any game.

    • @thelastcasualty2696
      @thelastcasualty2696 Před 4 lety +3

      Exactly, this video was boring and repetitive. The title says "Assassin Only Challenge", yet every single time he failed he reloaded. I don't see any "challenge" in that.

    • @joa65
      @joa65 Před 4 lety

      Absolutely.

    • @joa65
      @joa65 Před 4 lety

      @@thelastcasualty2696 100 % agreed!

  • @SheepsAndFishies
    @SheepsAndFishies Před 4 lety

    I'm 10 minutes in and I've heard the word murder more than in every crime based TV series combined.
    The Spiffing Brit is indeed a true medieval historian, murdering his way through the continent. Absolutely splendid!

  • @Awoken_Remmuz
    @Awoken_Remmuz Před 4 lety +1

    *sips my cup of coffee loudly*

  • @yootooooooob
    @yootooooooob Před 4 lety +20

    Perfect... just made a cuppa

  • @FuligJakab
    @FuligJakab Před 4 lety +4

    Glad to see medieval 2 here (also, rome total war would be great), but come on Spiff, you can do better! Show us some really cheesy exploits, not just quicksave&reload

  • @LL-dj3oh
    @LL-dj3oh Před 4 lety

    I got response from yorkshire tea when i asked them to sponsor spif:
    Thanks for getting in touch, yes we are aware of the Spiffing Brit, we do talk to him and supply tea bags for him to enjoy from time to time. Great to read you are also a fan now too……
    Happy Brewing!