How to Make Small Talk With Strangers | The Art of Manliness

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  • čas přidán 5. 04. 2014
  • Learn how to make small talk with strangers. Read a more detailed guide here: www.artofmanliness.com/2012/08...
    Filmed and Directed by Jordan Crowder
    Cast:
    James Creque
    Josh Duvendeck
    Alissa Garcia
    Lacy Prince
    Micah Sudduth
  • Jak na to + styl

Komentáře • 1,6K

  • @TheMoaDude
    @TheMoaDude Před 8 lety +2219

    "Hey, I noticed your shirt was blue. Do you think George Bush did 9/11?"

  • @RossKempOnYourMum01
    @RossKempOnYourMum01 Před 8 lety +2467

    "...so what's it like being black?"

    • @randomuser1105
      @randomuser1105 Před 8 lety +67

      +RossKempOnYourMum01 Meh. It's okay I guess.

    • @dunnowy123
      @dunnowy123 Před 8 lety +208

      I noticed you are of African descent. Are you from Zimbabwe?

    • @bobrew461
      @bobrew461 Před 8 lety +7

      +JiminyCriket ;-)

    • @Fromzer
      @Fromzer Před 8 lety +8

      lol, funny. but I'd say that guy is brown. Its kinda weird to call Indians black. Its not about racism, I mean I'm lighter than that guy but I'm definitely black.

    • @dunnowy123
      @dunnowy123 Před 8 lety +9

      +DMool
      Nahhh that guy's black.
      Although I can see why you'd think that, he looks kinda Tamil.

  • @dbpooper7512
    @dbpooper7512 Před 7 lety +1492

    "I noticed you're wearing a wedding ring. See ya."

  • @GustavoMaciel
    @GustavoMaciel Před 9 lety +2036

    sorry, but it didn't work for me. the girl I tried to talk to yesterday didn't even know who dr. landis was

    • @TheToneBender
      @TheToneBender Před 9 lety +37

      ha! brilliant

    • @Maxxplayne
      @Maxxplayne Před 9 lety +5

      lmao

    • @jgonsalk
      @jgonsalk Před 8 lety +9

      +Gustavo Maciel Hahahah! That got a belly laugh.

    • @HenningColin
      @HenningColin Před 8 lety +6

      +Gustavo Maciel Proper laughing at that! Excellent, sir

    • @maurowws
      @maurowws Před 8 lety +8

      +Gustavo Maciel huahuahuaaaa.. you rock man

  • @wubwubwubwubwubwubwubwub5014
    @wubwubwubwubwubwubwubwub5014 Před 8 lety +1540

    "I noticed there's no grilling meats at this party, are you vegetarian?"
    10/10 great question.

    • @vkd96
      @vkd96 Před 8 lety +9

      +wubwubwubwubwubwubwubwub I rate it 5/7

    • @jabeztomer
      @jabeztomer Před 8 lety +104

      +wubwubwubwubwubwubwubwub
      "I noticed there's no grilling meats at this party, are you a cheapskate?"

    • @GogogoFolowMe
      @GogogoFolowMe Před 8 lety +4

      +wubwubwubwubwubwubwubwub I rate it bacon/beef

    • @intothelean2930
      @intothelean2930 Před 8 lety +29

      +wubwubwubwubwubwubwubwub LOL a vegetarian a fighter pilot and a lesbian walked into a bar - how did I know ? they told everyone :P

    • @kevinikeonu3844
      @kevinikeonu3844 Před 7 lety +7

      wubwubwubwubwubwubwubwub hahha. some of those questions were corny Af

  • @aaron-4062
    @aaron-4062 Před 8 lety +2792

    I always keep these handy topics at hand for awkward silences:
    R - religion
    A - abortion
    P - politics
    E - environmental pollution
    Perfect to strike up conversation, plus it has a handy acronym.

    • @oscarma15
      @oscarma15 Před 8 lety +170

      you killed me 😂😂😂

    • @Chris-hn2md
      @Chris-hn2md Před 6 lety +99

      LMFAO!!!! I CANT FUCKING BREATHE! THIS COMMENT DESERVES WAAAAAAAAY MORE LIKES. SO UNDERATED!

    • @thinkboutit
      @thinkboutit Před 6 lety +5

      Aaron - epic

    • @MelodyLiuJade
      @MelodyLiuJade Před 6 lety +25

      How did you come up with this omfg I can’t stop laughing

    • @TheTsugnawmi2010
      @TheTsugnawmi2010 Před 5 lety +10

      RAPE. A handy dandy rule of thumb

  • @MrMagJon
    @MrMagJon Před 8 lety +996

    "I noticed you're not wearing black shoes, are you racist?"

    • @supraman34
      @supraman34 Před 7 lety +21

      lmao i have to give you a w

    • @greatguy423
      @greatguy423 Před 7 lety +1

      MrMagJon 200th like!

    • @awesome1ru
      @awesome1ru Před 6 lety

      MrMagJon lol who says that

    • @wickedliquid1177
      @wickedliquid1177 Před 6 lety +11

      I noticed the shoe laces are white, does that mean you put white on top of every other color.???..... Like I do..😉😀😂

    • @mischaglowinglotus
      @mischaglowinglotus Před 6 lety

      Haha

  • @PeterBlack
    @PeterBlack Před 10 lety +501

    Today I talked to a girl and said 'Hi, how was your day?' She said, 'Just make my coffee, please.'

    • @Caesar0031
      @Caesar0031 Před 10 lety +225

      Ask her to make you a sandwich first.

    • @onlyhuman3
      @onlyhuman3 Před 10 lety +185

      You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

    • @rackt09
      @rackt09 Před 10 lety +19

      onlyhuman3 No. Making or missing a shot requires the attempt at the shot.
      As far as analogies go...

    • @ninjanerdstudent6937
      @ninjanerdstudent6937 Před 9 lety +47

      You should talk about the origin of how the coffee beans were harvested. It's a dirty job, but somebody has to do it.

    • @lizziedanger4271
      @lizziedanger4271 Před 6 lety +4

      Trading Card Noob well, just make her coffee you bird. no one owes you a conversation. newsflash, some people just don't want to talk

  • @FortuneSeek3rz
    @FortuneSeek3rz Před 7 lety +231

    "I noticed you were married, have you ever thought about divorce?"

    • @Boccaccio1811
      @Boccaccio1811 Před 7 lety +5

      Lol this is the best one

    • @FreethemGuyz
      @FreethemGuyz Před 2 měsíci

      😢😢😢a lot of ppl love the race jokes... but this is the best one...good luck on you guys divorce,, its coming😢😢😢

  • @nightmaya8530
    @nightmaya8530 Před 7 lety +653

    I noticed you're running away, are you an athlete?

  • @angeljohn3724
    @angeljohn3724 Před 9 lety +510

    "I noticed you are wearing a blue dress, do you have something against the bloods?"

    • @arshad_nazran
      @arshad_nazran Před 9 lety +93

      "Hey, I noticed your breasts are sagging, don't you wear a bra?

  • @alannaclay4084
    @alannaclay4084 Před 7 lety +1020

    "I noticed you have blonde hair. Are you from Swedish decent?" HAHAHA , THE FUCK?! 😂😂😂😂😂

    • @Sesquipedaliofobia
      @Sesquipedaliofobia Před 7 lety +3

      XD

    • @AlekssKingoftrollsxIskanderovs
      @AlekssKingoftrollsxIskanderovs Před 7 lety +124

      Oh same,I was watching the video and laughed at that part, I've been trying to improve my small talk from this video, what brings you to this video?

    • @alannaclay4084
      @alannaclay4084 Před 7 lety +86

      +KingofTrollsx Are you really trying to make small talk over comment after watching a CZcams video on how to make small talk ??
      😂💀😂💀😂

    • @AlekssKingoftrollsxIskanderovs
      @AlekssKingoftrollsxIskanderovs Před 7 lety +146

      *SHIT MY COVER IS BLOWN*

    • @alannaclay4084
      @alannaclay4084 Před 7 lety +46

      +KingofTrollsx I noticed sir that your profile picture is consistent of 4 equal colors in captured in a perfect circle , is that because you love the game of Simon ?

  • @shybzrk2291
    @shybzrk2291 Před 7 lety +1442

    "I noticed you're not a Jew, are you a fan of Hitler's?"

  • @Elk0990
    @Elk0990 Před 9 lety +1404

    I noticed that you don't have a wedding ring, is your husband dead?

  • @pepinyostep3592
    @pepinyostep3592 Před 8 lety +455

    "Ive noticed you look overweight are you pregnant?"

    • @kayzak5785
      @kayzak5785 Před 8 lety +20

      ahahahaha, Someone asked me if I was pregnant and I was like, shiiiiit, hope not.

    • @joographics
      @joographics Před 6 lety +8

      I noticed you look pregnant... are you overweight??

    • @IIIISai
      @IIIISai Před 4 lety +3

      @@joographics Bruh LMAOOO

    • @TheBcoolGuy
      @TheBcoolGuy Před 4 lety +1

      Yes I am. I'm a man and a virgin, but I'm pregnant by means of immaculate conception.

    • @lobsterworldwide
      @lobsterworldwide Před 3 lety

      I notice you look pregnant, are you overweight?

  • @the_a_destoyervlogs6980
    @the_a_destoyervlogs6980 Před 7 lety +375

    I noticed you have eyes can you see

    • @philochristos
      @philochristos Před 6 lety +4

      Or, "I noticed you have two eyes. Are they both real?" It's a legitimate question. I dated a girl who had a glass eye.

    • @TartarianTopG
      @TartarianTopG Před 6 lety +1

      The_a_destoyer Vlogs hahahahaha I’m dead

    • @Blinkster93
      @Blinkster93 Před 6 lety

      Omg lol, that was good XD

  • @TrueGamer181
    @TrueGamer181 Před 9 lety +101

    As an introvert, small talk is painful and boring, but I see the value in it.

    • @ps-uj5dm
      @ps-uj5dm Před 7 lety +2

      TrueGamer181 ya true that bro.its hard but worth it

    • @patrickhodson8715
      @patrickhodson8715 Před 7 lety +6

      TrueGamer181 Hey I noticed you're an introvert. Do you have any creative hobbies, or do you prefer books and movies?

    • @katiewaity3413
      @katiewaity3413 Před 5 lety

      I don’t find it boring at all! I find lots of people very interesting and charming
      I just never know what to say lol

    • @TF80s
      @TF80s Před 5 lety

      @@patrickhodson8715 "No, I don't have any hobbies and hate reading books and watching movies"...next question?

    • @shorx9199
      @shorx9199 Před 4 lety +1

      @@TF80s Nobody seems to have the answer... Ever!

  • @fernando18455
    @fernando18455 Před 8 lety +914

    "walks up to girl"
    " I noticed you have big hands, do you have cancer?"

    • @topgun370
      @topgun370 Před 7 lety +64

      Winning! My mom died of cancer last year and she would have, like I just did, cracked up laughing at this one. Hi mom!

    • @fidahaq9729
      @fidahaq9729 Před 7 lety +2

      lol

    • @rayaan3395
      @rayaan3395 Před 5 lety +2

      James Wow, that shows how much of morrons your family is.

    • @emaadawazem6971
      @emaadawazem6971 Před 5 lety

      😂😂

    • @thenamesnate7096
      @thenamesnate7096 Před 3 lety +3

      @@rayaan3395 How so

  • @CyanideShock
    @CyanideShock Před 9 lety +193

    "I noticed you have an iphone, was their a reason why you chose that over an android?" this question made me LMFAO, the way he said it did not sound authentic or interested at all.

    • @stevencarter3254
      @stevencarter3254 Před 9 lety +28

      ***** Exactly. There is no educated reason to get the iPhone in the first place. Just, "It's Shiny!"

    • @PankajKumar6493
      @PankajKumar6493 Před 9 lety +2

      Steven Carter lol

    • @greg77389
      @greg77389 Před 7 lety +10

      Sounds like something a snarky nerd would say when he's looking for an argument...

    • @a_ndy2837
      @a_ndy2837 Před 6 lety

      hey you talk like an android yourself, buddy.

  • @PavchBavin
    @PavchBavin Před 9 lety +288

    This is like an instructional guide for non humans. Much appreciated.

  • @Jamesucht
    @Jamesucht Před 7 lety +598

    I'm an introvert. This shit is like Kryptonite.

  • @davidborg5479
    @davidborg5479 Před 10 lety +162

    The power of the stache

  • @ChinchillupaGuy
    @ChinchillupaGuy Před 7 lety +233

    "I noticed you're an amputee, do you work at ihop?" * ice broken *

    • @benjamincox4211
      @benjamincox4211 Před 4 lety +2

      Chinchillupa Guy done

    • @matthew8153
      @matthew8153 Před 4 lety +2

      Chinchillupa Guy
      I noticed you work at Fingerhut, are you a lesbian?

    • @QUIETCUBE222
      @QUIETCUBE222 Před měsícem +1

      Timeless comment LMAO

  • @RandolphCrane
    @RandolphCrane Před 7 lety +23

    This comment section is pure gold.

  • @thisisthebestid
    @thisisthebestid Před 9 lety +81

    1. Anchor, Reveal, Encourage
    2. Observe and Listen
    3. Compliment + Question
    4. Family, Occupation, Recreation, Motivation.
    Got it, Thanks!

    • @chantalx388
      @chantalx388 Před 5 lety +2

      I go for motivation, because peoples life passion and dreams are inherently interesting and reflect the type of person they are

    • @samikdas4345
      @samikdas4345 Před 10 měsíci

      SV❤

  • @MagusKali
    @MagusKali Před 10 lety +134

    One way that I was able to learn how to talk to people, back when I was very shy and anti social, was to help them feel comfortable and relaxed while we were talking, as if I had known them for many years.
    People, especially women, are very perceptive with regards to how confident or nervous you are due to subtle non verbal cues; but if you look at them as if they are a normal part of your life, that nervousness tends to not be so strong.
    Plus, it doesn't hurt to be authentically interested in them, as a person.
    Just my two cents.

  • @panzach
    @panzach Před 8 lety +103

    "I noticed we're talking to each other for the past 10 minutes now. Do you mind if I go to the toilet because I have nothing else to say to you?"

  • @14s0cc3r14
    @14s0cc3r14 Před 8 lety +443

    Is it just me or did the "observe" questions seem super awkward and kind of creepy?

    • @NikhilWolf
      @NikhilWolf Před 7 lety +48

      It's the white guy lol. He was super awkward.

    • @ArnaudFTW
      @ArnaudFTW Před 7 lety +157

      "are you from swedish descent?"
      what the fuck.

    • @derkhaslol
      @derkhaslol Před 7 lety +48

      Yeah and a question about the phone operating system haha

    • @200ThingsILove
      @200ThingsILove Před 7 lety +13

      @Fark I honestly thought he was going to ask her if that was her natural color.

    • @DesperateSol
      @DesperateSol Před 7 lety +10

      I think it seemed more awkward because he asked so many in quick secession, in a real conversation you would only ask one at a time.

  • @davethebarber62920
    @davethebarber62920 Před 8 lety +232

    I see you're blonde, does the carpet match the drapes?

    • @dreamvillain8815
      @dreamvillain8815 Před 8 lety +5

      💀

    • @mattesses70
      @mattesses70 Před 7 lety +2

      David Childers
      sadly no

    • @greg77389
      @greg77389 Před 7 lety

      +Matt Esses
      The f*ck do you know?

    • @mattesses70
      @mattesses70 Před 7 lety

      greg77389 I'm blonde sweetie

    • @greg77389
      @greg77389 Před 7 lety

      Matt Esses
      Doesn't mean it's true for other blondes... And are you even a woman? You have a male name...

  • @jllarivee60
    @jllarivee60 Před 7 lety +109

    I noticed you're wearing clothes... Do you uhhh always wear clothes?

  • @ProudSF
    @ProudSF Před 9 lety +62

    I hate small talk but it's one of those things you have to learn

    • @UTUBESUCK666
      @UTUBESUCK666 Před 9 lety +26

      Peter Zhao Same here. Lets talk about the meaning of life, shall we?

    • @gamer6965
      @gamer6965 Před 9 lety

      In peace and

    • @ProudSF
      @ProudSF Před 8 lety

      Stelio Kontos Are you a hot girl?

    • @refatenglish3148
      @refatenglish3148 Před 8 lety +1

      Peter Zhao
      Are you a girl or a boy?

    • @ProudSF
      @ProudSF Před 8 lety +1

      refat english dOES IT MATTER?

  • @lucasvilleza1188
    @lucasvilleza1188 Před 7 lety +295

    "I noticed you have arms, are you a dolphin"?

  • @VinceLA91
    @VinceLA91 Před 8 lety +50

    "I noticed you're in a wheelchair. How did you fuck up your legs?"

  • @0ion
    @0ion Před 8 lety +76

    Hmm.. instructions unclear, I can't talk to someone with out the dialogue wheel from the elder scrolls: IV Oblivion.

    • @chantalx388
      @chantalx388 Před 5 lety

      The most interesting conversations are the unscripted ones that require some element of spontaneity/abstract thought.

  • @xRawrBawr
    @xRawrBawr Před 9 lety +47

    I love this advice.
    Everyone else online that tries to help with this always says the same dribble; be yourself, remember that they are just as scared, don't ask to many questions, get the other person to talk about themselves, eye contact and facial expressions, blah blah blah. It's about as useful as saying "the best way to bake a potato is to use heat and then add stuff to make it interesting"; we know, and it doesn't help us to actually do it.
    But this advice hits the nail on the head; simple, computer-like instructions to start the ball moving. I've been trying this for a few days (both in person and texting) and I can see a good increase in my ability to keep a conversation from turning awkward, not to mention my social interactions are much more pleasant. Thank you.

  • @Tqle0
    @Tqle0 Před 8 lety +32

    "Hey! I saw a video about small talk, am i doing ok?"

    • @Jamil1989
      @Jamil1989 Před 4 lety +2

      That's actualy pretty good, dude. You should try on a girl.

  • @mattislarsson1831
    @mattislarsson1831 Před 8 lety +127

    In a few years you would ask: I notice you look arabic do come from Swedish descent?

    • @The2701666
      @The2701666 Před 8 lety +2

      +Mattis Larsson that's very funny lol

    • @killj0y58
      @killj0y58 Před 8 lety +1

      Very clever lmao

    • @killj0y58
      @killj0y58 Před 8 lety +2

      +Wojciech Bochenek there are blonde arab people bro. Syrians can be blonde. Afghans are ethnically Greek and can definitely be blonde with green eyes.

    • @KatariaGujjar
      @KatariaGujjar Před 5 lety +1

      @@killj0y58
      Afghans are not Arabs

    • @olivers.3144
      @olivers.3144 Před 4 lety +1

      Mattis Larsson I noticed you make jokes about immigration, do you hate immigrants?

  • @TRUMP-lw1rq
    @TRUMP-lw1rq Před 8 lety +786

    This did not work for me at all. The girl I tried talking to didnt even know who Dr. Landis was.

  • @otayo.g8466
    @otayo.g8466 Před 9 lety +435

    Saying "Hey nice bewbs!" is less creepy than asking "I noticed you have blonde hair, do you come from Swedish descent?"

    • @jijst5
      @jijst5 Před 9 lety +49

      "Have you ever heard about Adolf's Lebensborn?"

    • @KGS922
      @KGS922 Před 9 lety +10

      OTAY O.G If she's actually of Swedish descent, I fail to see how asking that is more creepy

    • @chantalx388
      @chantalx388 Před 5 lety +5

      @@KGS922 I'm with KG here, this is the type of question I would ask out of curiosity for finding patterns of genetics in my environment. With time, ones intuitions should hypothetically become more accurate and more impressive.

    • @yjmay1304
      @yjmay1304 Před 4 lety +9

      You are so stupid, how is being a creepy pervert, less creepy then asking if she is from Swedish descents.

    • @notsky8985
      @notsky8985 Před 3 lety +1

      Im DEAD, glad I wasn't the only one thinking that was weird as fuck

  • @AqilDaiyan
    @AqilDaiyan Před 7 lety +61

    Dude people just reply "yeah" or "no" and the convo ends there

    • @davidbergaragonzalez5653
      @davidbergaragonzalez5653 Před 7 lety +20

      He said ask open ended questions. If they answer yes or no to an open ended question, find someone else to talk to.

    • @grnd_ctrl8387
      @grnd_ctrl8387 Před 7 lety +45

      +David Bergara - Gonzalez
      "What do you like about that?"
      Them: "Yes."

    • @QuackersMcCrackers
      @QuackersMcCrackers Před 7 lety +11

      Lmfao

  • @artofmanliness
    @artofmanliness  Před 10 lety +104

    How to Make Small Talk With Strangers [VIDEO] bit.ly/PCNpC6 Directed by Jordan Crowder

    • @the1lordawesomness
      @the1lordawesomness Před 10 lety +6

      This was actually really helpful :D

    • @chesterlohman
      @chesterlohman Před 10 lety +1

      Everyone needs to develop thus skill. Meeting new people is awesome and you should never miss an opportunity!

    • @chesterlohman
      @chesterlohman Před 10 lety +1

      Love these comments glad everyone liked the article. Brett does a great job with his site and if your not following him, yet you should start.

    • @chesterlohman
      @chesterlohman Před 10 lety

      Levi Rawls Check your local Chamber of commerce or Google networking events in your area. Good luck!

    • @CleverDjembe
      @CleverDjembe Před 9 lety +1

      the1lordawesomness Your use of the word "actually" leads me to believe you expected it to not be helpful. Is that right?

  • @Vpopov81
    @Vpopov81 Před 9 lety +336

    that mustache tho...

    • @artofmanliness
      @artofmanliness  Před 9 lety +74

      Victor Popov Thanks

    • @valerydanielablanconunez5334
    • @jayjo448
      @jayjo448 Před 9 lety +6

      Art of Manliness It doesn't seem to suit you..yet. When you're older, bit more wrinkled and maybe some salt and pepper, that thing will look badass

    • @bobdabuilder4075
      @bobdabuilder4075 Před 8 lety +1

      +Victor Popov is this not the art of manliness channel

    • @Corranhorn122
      @Corranhorn122 Před 8 lety

      +Jay Jo I think it just needs to be trimmed a bit.

  • @poopslayer9000
    @poopslayer9000 Před 7 lety +113

    "I noticed you're wearing blue, do you have something against the bloods?"

  • @ChefMarkyMarkz
    @ChefMarkyMarkz Před 8 lety +14

    I tried these tips on my starbucks coffee maker... She told me to ''Fuck off,Mark'' she knows my name! ty +art of manliness

  • @patrickbcurke
    @patrickbcurke Před 7 lety +67

    Tip 1: Alcohol

    • @matthew8153
      @matthew8153 Před 4 lety

      Patrick Burke Clason
      Tip 2: Old pickup truck

    • @bdflatlander
      @bdflatlander Před 4 lety

      Even better: marijuana.
      When I was working I used to hate going to office functions, especially holiday parties. One year I discovered a way to cope with them: I would arrive at the venue, smoke some MJ in my car and by the time I arrived at the party I was flying pretty high. Instead of being socially awkward I became Mr. Friendly and could talk to anyone about anything under the sun.
      When I felt the buzz start to wear off I would go back to my car and top it off. Worked great for me.
      Hey, some people drink alcohol (many times to excess) - I preferred Mary Jane.

  • @dothedeed
    @dothedeed Před 10 lety +15

    I usually feel seriously uncomfortable when people ask me a ton of questions back to back and it DOES feel like an interrogation. I usually try to get them to pause and let me know something about themselves too. I don't know if Im overly guarded but I really don't like giving out a ton of personal info when just meeting a stranger. At the same time I don't want want to appear cold or disinterested. I really like this "friendly noises" phrase.

  • @n3rdbear
    @n3rdbear Před 8 lety +21

    "do you have something against the bloods?" I lol'd hard.

  • @eirikmurito
    @eirikmurito Před 8 lety +32

    what kind of psychopath arranges a meatless bbq!

  • @tylercunningham3275
    @tylercunningham3275 Před 10 lety +82

    Most of the questions sounded like a job/news interview and seemed very forced.

    • @artofmanliness
      @artofmanliness  Před 10 lety +35

      Then offer some suggestions on questions you think people should ask.

    • @artofmanliness
      @artofmanliness  Před 10 lety +22

      ***** I know, right?

    • @Afterword.
      @Afterword. Před 10 lety +46

      "So, have you ever committed a crime?"
      "Do you enjoy music or are you deaf?"
      "Yo, yo, yo, whatchya doin' in mah hood?"
      "Please, tell me a story, Mom. Oh, you're not my mom. Awkward..."
      "Kirk or Picard?"
      "Is the Art of Manliness evil?"

    • @kajocina
      @kajocina Před 10 lety

      The pineapple-shaped cup question was great, admit that...

    • @lakethompson3522
      @lakethompson3522 Před 9 lety

      They sound rehearsed because this is a youtube video, and all their responses were rehearsed.
      *gasp*

  • @XxAmiIzunexX
    @XxAmiIzunexX Před 8 lety +6

    For people who are struggling with small talk, I have your perfect solution!
    Go up to people and ask those weird questions, like what's the bloody meaning of life. The people who respond and play along are worth your time and the people who don't, well leave em alone. They can go engage in boring, time wasting small talk.

  • @BreadCatMarcus
    @BreadCatMarcus Před 8 lety +5

    THAT'S NOT HOW YOU FILM AN OTS SHOT REVERSE SHOT.
    But seriously, these comments are better than most comedies. Keep it up everyone.

  • @4867503
    @4867503 Před 9 lety +59

    Wait a sec here...was 4:39 supposed to be an example of GOOD conversation starters? Cause that was one incredibly awful, unnatural and awkward line of questions. And the dude's delivery was straight up creepy.

    • @mrwayofwarrior7853
      @mrwayofwarrior7853 Před 6 lety +3

      if you are hot its not creepy

    • @bumbozambumbazebulon6738
      @bumbozambumbazebulon6738 Před 2 lety

      "I've noticed you've a wedding ring, are you accident prone ? have you heard about avulsions? Do you know what "degloving" means?"
      "I've noticed your ears are pierced, did you know the front nub * *grabs* * of your outer ear is called TRAGUS ? It's the Greek word for "he-goat" because of Satyrs, those half men half goat beings * *whispers closely* * that.just.couldn't.stop.F_CKING?"
      "I've noticed you pretend to be a blonde. If I challenged you to splash a bit of cider vinegar it wouldn't become a peracetic acid would it ? * *chasing and screaming* * You've nothing to fear if it's not peroxide! "
      "I've noticed you've got an iPhone. Save a photo from a Messages conversation to your Camera Roll, check to see that it has been saved. Now delete the Messages conversation the photo came from. The photo will still be in your ‌iCloud Photo Library‌. But when you do an ‌iCloud‌ Backup, the photo will be GONE. You think that is bad? Let's chat about Zero-Day Security Vulnerabilities never addressed. Or Pegasus. But first we must place these phones inside a cocktail shaker. YES THEY ARE ALWAYS LISTENING IT'S THE ONLY WAY TO BE SURE"

    • @QUIETCUBE222
      @QUIETCUBE222 Před měsícem

      warrior lesson 343: be wary of pick up lines unless you're a sexy beast

  • @trybenga
    @trybenga Před 10 lety +48

    "I noticed you have wooden earrings... Do you feel like you're an earthly creature?" Made me laugh really hard, great video!

  • @VanBurenOfficial
    @VanBurenOfficial Před 8 lety +61

    how about: Who's your favorite Austrian Emperor? or What's your opinion on Flag change referendums?

    • @dunnowy123
      @dunnowy123 Před 8 lety +1

      +Bogmire777
      What is your opinion on the Crimean War?

    • @VanBurenOfficial
      @VanBurenOfficial Před 8 lety +2

      dunnowy123 That it had less to do with Religious rights and more to do with the great power chess-match. I think that's a pretty common interpretation though. what about you? See now were having a conversation.

    • @dunnowy123
      @dunnowy123 Před 8 lety +1

      Bogmire777
      LOL
      Completely agree. Religious rights and the Christian-Muslim rivalry may have been a part of it, but personally I see the decline of the Ottoman Empire and an emergent Russia as the primary impetus.

    • @usArrr3
      @usArrr3 Před 8 lety +1

      +Bogmire777 Mine's Maximilian I, what is your opinion on Habsburg descendants being in modern day policital parties? ;)

    • @VanBurenOfficial
      @VanBurenOfficial Před 8 lety +3

      I think its really odd. I'm kinda into it, but I'm not sure. I think Franz Joseph gets a bad rep.

  • @Jokestur
    @Jokestur Před 7 lety +11

    One of those videos I'll watch and pretend to learn from, but never actually used any of the information to my advantage.

  • @TheWolfePit
    @TheWolfePit Před 10 lety +113

    Great video!!

  • @zeliph
    @zeliph Před 10 lety +67

    This is pretty good when it comes to those networking events that my school hosts every semester. I'll keep in mind of the advice you've shared in this video. Maybe I can land into a job sometime from those events!

  • @mattyallred
    @mattyallred Před 9 lety +7

    wow cant believe there are videos of how to make small talk on here. I cant believe how shy some people are. All you have to remember is no matter there achievement in life or how hot they are they are all flesh and bone just like you, and anyone who doesn't give you the time of day because they think your better then them just means there not worth the effort. Its a shame there are people that make others feel less or insecure. But if these videos help others then all for that, but really no one needs a video they just gotta know who they are. Once you define yourself as a human/ Male or female, Then its very hard for others to change that, its damn near impossible. Ive been shy for many years but what helped me is the fact I had many years of hell I had to go through alone, Not gonna discuss the details on here but it really made me look at myself differently. I know realise there is no point to being shy, there is no one I wouldn't talk to, there is not much I wouldn't do to get a laugh, Hell I wore a tiggar suit ( from pooh bear lol ) through a shopping mall just to get a few laughs. years before when I was shy I didn't like talking in public much. You can watch all the videos you want and slowly build courage sure, or u can just jump in the deep end and learn it quick. what is the worst that will happen is they say go away or no, is that really worse then being lonely? if your truly lonely then u realise that is something you don't want to live with, and other peoples opinions just don't matter. Not saying its easy its very hard, but its still harder to hate yourself or doubt yourself.

    • @mattyallred
      @mattyallred Před 9 lety

      Yeah it sucks but its my burden to bare, to achieve is for some to smell like a tennis players foot after a comp is for me.

    • @navidsgs1926
      @navidsgs1926 Před 9 lety

      Very nice English 10/10

    • @mattyallred
      @mattyallred Před 9 lety +1

      I always trieded my bestest :)

    • @randomuser1105
      @randomuser1105 Před 8 lety +1

      +Matt David I'm sorry that not everyone is as perfect as you. :(

    • @mattyallred
      @mattyallred Před 8 lety

      randomuser1105 Perfect? haha not sure where you got that out of the comments, Im just trying to help others out there, I said that if these videos help I am all for it, I also said that no one needs them they just need to trust themselves and trust that it will get easier. Im so far from perfect but am working on that. We all got our battles and im only trying to be a helpful voice in a dark room, Going through things alone sucks and is scary. Why not offer a helping hand if I can?

  • @Sesquipedaliofobia
    @Sesquipedaliofobia Před 7 lety +126

    4:38 I'm sorry but these are cringy questions

    • @siddhantjain9596
      @siddhantjain9596 Před 7 lety +60

      Sesquipedaliofobia so true. I would rather ask the meaning of life

    • @acidwavves
      @acidwavves Před 7 lety +35

      It's more the delivery that's cringeworthy.

    • @canererbay8842
      @canererbay8842 Před 6 lety +8

      Well, I genuinely took that part as a joke.

  • @aaronmt14
    @aaronmt14 Před 9 lety +6

    as embarrassing as it is for me to admit, this video is quite helpful. As an introvert (not anti-social) it's hard for me to engage in conversation with strangers about things that we both care nothing about, but the main thing i think I found helpful was that it pointed out that small talk is the only way to get the ball rolling on to more meaningful conversation, which, obviously i knew, but i guess i just needed to hear someone say it to realize just how true it is

  • @SSKMusicBeats
    @SSKMusicBeats Před 8 lety +83

    yooo I love everyone in this comments section man, we all have the same sense of humor lmao lololol

    • @alanmarques3910
      @alanmarques3910 Před 5 lety

      Exactly

    • @jjsan27
      @jjsan27 Před 5 lety

      Of course. We're all introverts. Introverts destroy extroverts at comedy lol.

  • @555Gear
    @555Gear Před 10 lety +7

    One master of small talk from the movies is No Country for Old Men's Anton Chigurh. What a chatty Cathy.

  • @88riddlemethis
    @88riddlemethis Před 8 lety +22

    Conversations with people you dont know is just way too exhausting.

    • @88riddlemethis
      @88riddlemethis Před 8 lety +2

      Other kids would come bug me and forced themselves upon me.

    • @88riddlemethis
      @88riddlemethis Před 8 lety

      I was just shy as a kid. Life has changed dramatically since. I enjoy talking to new people.

    • @MrBryan-hr1rp
      @MrBryan-hr1rp Před 8 lety +3

      +88riddlemethis Wait, other kids FORCED THEMSELVES on you? Shit, dude, you may have been sexually abused as a child

  • @crossrodde
    @crossrodde Před 7 lety +43

    I don't get it, I ask dozens of strangers everyday if they will be my friend and its always really awkward. What am I doing wrong

    • @TazPessle
      @TazPessle Před 7 lety +7

      OMG in my head, your comment was acted out by Peter Griffin XD

    • @MikeyJMJ
      @MikeyJMJ Před 4 lety +2

      @Luke Brown That was hilarious

  • @reubenelijah1258
    @reubenelijah1258 Před 7 lety +9

    I noticed you have fingerprints. How'd you get such a unique pattern?

  • @happyguy963
    @happyguy963 Před 10 lety +35

    My biggest problem is stopping small talk WITHOUT an awkward, "soo... bye". How would a man end small talk?

    • @RJBeee91
      @RJBeee91 Před 10 lety +24

      Step 1: "So hey! It was awesome to (meet you, talk to you, catch up with you)."
      Step 2 depends on the occasion. If you're bumping into someone on your lunch break or on your way to class- "...but I've gotta run to (class, work)."
      If you're at a party, time your exit with the opportunity to go and talk to someone else you know or with the opportunity for the person you're talking to to talk to someone they know. Works in party settings and doesn't leave anyone standing by themselves awkwardly.
      Also, if you'd like to talk to the person more, ask for their number. If I'm on the way to class and I bump into a girl who's a friend of a friend and we have small talk- "So it was cool talking to you, but I've gotta run to class. Are you going to (social event with mutual friends or mutual interests)?" or "What're you doing after class?"
      etc.
      It ultimately all comes down to how you carry yourself man. Dress nicely, carry yourself confidently and you shouldn't have anything to worry about.

    • @shalvius
      @shalvius Před 9 lety +2

      The key is to be sincere and say honest reason why are you leaving. That puts the focus directly on you, so you take the burden off your conversation partner.
      Here are some exit lines that can be applied at networking events:
      I need to go see the exhibits.
      • I want to go talk to the speaker.
      • I’m going to circulate and meet some of the new members.
      • I want to see if there are any other people from my industry here today.
      • I must speak with the membership chairperson before she leaves.
      • I promised myself that I’d meet three new people before I leave this evening.
      • I want to meet some other potential clients this morning.
      • I want to get around and say hello to everyone at this meeting/party.
      Don't try to make any excuses when leaving, It’s important to retain your poise and state your reason for departing courteously.
      Source: "The Fine Art of Small Talk" by Debra Fine

    • @SebPereira
      @SebPereira Před 9 lety +1

      you can stop small talk by letting the person finish what they are saying then saying something like "wow thats very interesting, but anyway i have to get back to my friends so i hope you enjoy the rest of your night" or something like that based on the situation you are in.

    • @diaglooploop3574
      @diaglooploop3574 Před 9 lety +8

      i would have said "fuck this shit im done" then walk away doing a back flip at the end.

    • @bloodynachos
      @bloodynachos Před 9 lety +3

      Just leave them in mid sentence. Dont say a word and just walk off. Own it

  • @dduelm
    @dduelm Před 9 lety +7

    Thank you thank you thank you. This is one of my greatest struggles and my wife is so frustrated at my fear of social settings. She can't believe that someone can be so awkward like I am. She seems to think I am intentionally antisocial but it is not true. What helped me the most is that "friendly noises" concept. I don't want to sound fake with new people but since there is very little connecting me with the new person, the initial exchanges are necessarily going to be pretty superficial. Thanks again! SUBSCRIBED!!

  • @butter_nut1817
    @butter_nut1817 Před 7 lety +141

    You have to be at least 30 to use these

    • @yohlahGo
      @yohlahGo Před 5 lety +1

      Middle schoolers can't take these conversations seriously. highschoolers, they are getting there. Some are mature. I've met a group of middle schoolers in my grade I want to talk to because they are mature. But I just cant

    • @shorx9199
      @shorx9199 Před 4 lety

      @@yohlahGo so what conversations do middle schoolers do?

    • @propane_salesman
      @propane_salesman Před 4 lety +5

      @@shorx9199 video games, sex, and racism

    • @roundduck7005
      @roundduck7005 Před 4 lety

      @@propane_salesman
      Based

  • @Gurianthe
    @Gurianthe Před 10 lety +50

    why didn't you tell me this when I was in high school?

    • @artofmanliness
      @artofmanliness  Před 10 lety +58

      Sorry, dude.

    • @Stromedy
      @Stromedy Před 7 lety +3

      lawra Weltreich good thing you didn't know about these questions in high school

  • @RJSyeah
    @RJSyeah Před 8 lety +4

    These are brilliant instructional videos on this channel - very informative, logical, precise and direct. I think the video demos are what make it great rather than just hearing someone lecture you

  • @MasterNoxob
    @MasterNoxob Před 7 lety +2

    Those "I noticed" questions made my day.

  • @Ratchet2022
    @Ratchet2022 Před 5 lety +7

    Wow, I watched this video a while ago and thought to myself that I’m already good at holding a conversation. This morning I went to a new church, and I was the awkward single guy that just stood there listening to others. I’ve got to practice these things. It’s hard at first, but I know once I’m successfully able to execute these tips, they’ll stick in my mind. Wow, unless you work at something, you don’t usually just have it naturally.

  • @ItzBerg
    @ItzBerg Před 7 lety +35

    Good luck trying these tips with social anxiety like myself. 👍🏼😄🔫

    • @SuperWeedPower
      @SuperWeedPower Před 7 lety +3

      dude, nothing like a good 40% drink to free your mind

    • @fardinrahmankhan6747
      @fardinrahmankhan6747 Před 6 lety

      I also have social anxiety like you i would say Just don't think about what you said spit it out it worked for me.and also say positive things in your mind about the things you said to a person. Like when you start a conversation say(in your mind ) well that's great I actually started a conversation I'm improving

    • @TF80s
      @TF80s Před 5 lety

      @@fardinrahmankhan6747 When I spit things out without thinking I seem to offend people..even if I take my time to think about what to say I seem to offend people..I'm doomed either way :( also once you say something weird and offend people it's impossible to recover.

  • @ZeroSumJ1
    @ZeroSumJ1 Před 9 lety

    Man. I'm so grateful that I found this channel. Thank you for existing. Totally binge watched so many of your videos.

  • @SevenFootPelican
    @SevenFootPelican Před 7 lety +5

    This one is HUGELY important for me. I will be taking extra notes on this one.

  • @KillaCommieFerMommie
    @KillaCommieFerMommie Před 10 lety +16

    This channel is freaken awesome... The last 4 questions were great!

  • @Nsamity
    @Nsamity Před 2 lety +1

    “I noticed you have blonde hair, do you come from a Swedish descent?”
    totally gonna use this as a precursor to my pickup line

  • @Angelo-ni5op
    @Angelo-ni5op Před 7 lety +34

    I noticed you have a stache do you have candy?

  • @TheActualJoe
    @TheActualJoe Před 10 lety +14

    Hey AOM! I just wanted to say how much I live your videos. They are always very helpful, and well made. I can see you put lots of effort into these. Thank you very much and keep up the good work :)

  • @dunnowy123
    @dunnowy123 Před 8 lety +41

    I noticed you have a ring. Are you into open marriages?

    • @Irrkie
      @Irrkie Před 8 lety +2

      +dunnowy123 Actually made me laugh out loud, rarely happens on the internet. Amazing conversation starters.

    • @dunnowy123
      @dunnowy123 Před 8 lety +4

      +Erik Georgesson
      This whole comment section is golden lol

  • @Stormcrow41
    @Stormcrow41 Před 10 lety +1

    This is the most helpful and logically sound bit of small talk advice I've heard in a while. Thanks.

  • @zmdeadelius
    @zmdeadelius Před 5 lety

    As an introvert (who obviously is better at understanding neural networks rather than small talk) I gotta say this is the only small talk video that I actually understood. Great presentation.

  • @MultiAntedeguemon
    @MultiAntedeguemon Před 7 lety +3

    Dude, thanks for the video. As an introvert, it changed the way I look at small talk!

  • @RikSanchezMusic
    @RikSanchezMusic Před 10 lety +13

    Great video! Social media has crippled real life interactions to say the least, so I understand why some people might find it hard to strike small talk. Awkwardness is avoided like the plague, so sometimes interaction is too big of a risk, being that there is no time cushion to think up a witty resonse as there is when replying to something online. Practice small talk guys!

    • @sh0werp0wer
      @sh0werp0wer Před 10 lety +1

      That is so true, man. I was chatting with this girl for weeks, we actually had a lot in common, but when we finally met in real life it was very awkward seeing as none of us knew how to small talk, but that wasn't noticable when we chatted and had time to come up with responses without it being awkward.

    • @RikSanchezMusic
      @RikSanchezMusic Před 10 lety

      Just goes to show how valuable an asset small-talk can be. Takes work at first, but just jump into it, good luck man!

    • @garylebon6458
      @garylebon6458 Před 2 lety

      If only you knew how right you were...😒

  • @Jrjejfjebdcee
    @Jrjejfjebdcee Před 10 lety

    I've watched a couple of videos about making small talk, but none within the context of a man. A great video, tips on an essential skill for ANY man. Thanks Brett!

  • @cesarvaliopando4626
    @cesarvaliopando4626 Před 4 lety +1

    I noticed that comment section is the best thing in any video

  • @franklesterado8101
    @franklesterado8101 Před 9 lety +10

    "I noticed you have blonde hair... Do you come from Swedish decent" this made me laugh

  • @RynaxAlien
    @RynaxAlien Před 8 lety +15

    I hate talking but I like listening. I simply don't know how to small talk.

    • @Wolf179998
      @Wolf179998 Před 8 lety +7

      Same I am great at listing and in one on one conversations I'm okay but in a group I get so nerves I think stuff like "the shirt I'm wearing doesn't look good" and "my voice is too high pitched."

    • @zombieeater1247
      @zombieeater1247 Před 8 lety

      70% listening, 30% talking is good enough.

    • @DAPTXDC4869
      @DAPTXDC4869 Před 8 lety +3

      For me, it's simply an issue of being able to relate to conversations. My preferences in entertainment, media, interests, and even my lifestyle are often very uncommon in comparison to others. Finding that common ground to start a conversation that both sides will stay interested in is difficult for me.

    • @zombieeater1247
      @zombieeater1247 Před 8 lety

      The only common ground is the uncommon interest to others. very interesting

    • @greatguy423
      @greatguy423 Před 7 lety

      I hate both talking and Listening. But I like to dream.

  • @gorefieldluvr6921
    @gorefieldluvr6921 Před 8 lety +2

    I have a lot of social anxiety, like, i can barely smalltalk without it getting awkward after literally five seconds
    This really helped.. Thanks

  • @Kenstar365
    @Kenstar365 Před 8 lety

    Usually check out these videos just for a kick. I don't personally see myself as being bad at small talk, but this was actually well done and pretty insightful

  • @ReplayKCF
    @ReplayKCF Před 10 lety +189

    Are you........vegetarian??

    • @Cyberslashy
      @Cyberslashy Před 9 lety +33

      Naw bitch it's 2014 I'm a vegan! Up yo game son!

    • @Darius_Marx
      @Darius_Marx Před 9 lety +12

      Joey Bartholomew
      Talk like that will get you nowhere my friend.

    • @Cyberslashy
      @Cyberslashy Před 9 lety +51

      It got you to respond thus you're wrong.

    • @Darius_Marx
      @Darius_Marx Před 9 lety +23

      Ok.

    • @tsohgallik
      @tsohgallik Před 9 lety +1

      The host looks Indian, so he probably is.

  • @alexyonut5168
    @alexyonut5168 Před 7 lety +52

    Thanks young Pablo Escobar

  • @ilg2012
    @ilg2012 Před 7 lety +1

    this is great. so much rich content in a short video. kept having to rewind.

  • @Intellibear-Evan
    @Intellibear-Evan Před 9 lety +1

    Glad to see the best translation of The Odyssey on your bookshelf.

  • @platinumrubies85
    @platinumrubies85 Před 9 lety +30

    This was very helpful for shy non social critter like myself. Cant wait to use it.

    • @makkaramies2000
      @makkaramies2000 Před 9 lety

      Did it work?

    • @platinumrubies85
      @platinumrubies85 Před 9 lety +11

      it did! I'm a few notches up from where I was before which isnt a bad place to be. :)

    • @makkaramies2000
      @makkaramies2000 Před 9 lety

      Great!

    • @platinumrubies85
      @platinumrubies85 Před 9 lety

      thanx!

    • @dustind5557
      @dustind5557 Před 9 lety

      Java Bain This really was well done. I've come across quit a few videos hitting this same topic but too many use general concepts without any solid guidelines to follow. I remember when I would just go blank, having something as simple as form would have been great. I'm sure I can use it now still.

  • @VituMV
    @VituMV Před 10 lety +74

    Nice clothes! Mind talking about that jacket?

    • @artofmanliness
      @artofmanliness  Před 10 lety +13

      Vitu It's a seersucker type jacket. Super light and breathable. I wear it during the summer.

    • @VituMV
      @VituMV Před 10 lety +2

      Perfect, thanks! I'm new to your blog, is there a video you talk more about summer clothing styles? I live in the tropics in Brazil, and as you can imagine the heat gets pretty intense for a man who needs to be dressed in business-like clothing.

    • @artofmanliness
      @artofmanliness  Před 10 lety +6

      Vitu Here you go: www.artofmanliness.com/2009/07/23/mans-guide-to-summer-dress-part-1/

    • @panzach
      @panzach Před 8 lety +5

      +Art of Manliness What was that, an example of small-talking?

    • @sgim43
      @sgim43 Před 7 lety

      man there's some god awful examples in here... this video is like half self help and half a parody of self help videos...

  • @tomtom-ec6tb
    @tomtom-ec6tb Před 5 lety +2

    I prefer this for getting a quiet group into a lively debate:
    P - Politics (national) or Porn
    O - Office Politics
    R - Rewards (how much everyone is making)
    N - No BS (Anyone doing something you do not like then tell them straight and hopefully they will change - life is too short to fu*k around)

  • @research1982
    @research1982 Před 8 lety

    this is great. I have actually stumbled upon these occasionally when I wasn't painfully aware of my awkwardness

  • @fabsmaster5309
    @fabsmaster5309 Před 7 lety +20

    Those observations sounded super creepy

  • @chri11203
    @chri11203 Před 8 lety +41

    How am I now finding this channel.

    • @SethParadine
      @SethParadine Před 8 lety

      4 Days before I did! haha

    • @aspebb
      @aspebb Před 7 lety +3

      Chris Turnier Because CZcams doesn't make it easy to find a new channel.

    • @2inder2hundal
      @2inder2hundal Před 7 lety

      Chris Turnier you're the guy from the video Right?