Dear Sean, Love Stef | Grief & Loss Week 5 - Toughest Journey of My Life
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- čas přidán 12. 05. 2021
- Today marks the start of the next part of our story. The club that no one wants to be part of but unfortunately, is a harsh reality of cancer. Sean would tell me, "Our story does not end when I leave. There is so much more you can share." I want to honor his wishes the best I can and continue his legacy. This grief process is the hardest thing I have ever been through in my life and some days it's impossible to even function. I'm not sure where this road will leave but I'm going to do my best to share whatever comes along.
Thank you for all the continued love & support!
(BTW: Vegas Episode 2 is on the way. It is a very difficult thing for me to edit. I wanted to release all of the Vegas episodes before I started this series but it is taking me longer than I thought due to the reality that editing through tears is very hard. I promise they are coming soon. I love you all!)
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A Little About Sean & Stef:
We are professional filmmakers and have won 3 Emmy awards for our video work. We are positive filmmakers that focus on the joys on travel and all the fun that goes along with the journey. We travel the world exploring destinations, all while making video memories that last a lifetime. Our mission is to inspire and connect with people all around the world and show them the joys of traveling. We are personally and emotionally fulfilled by the amazing people we meet and hope to continue this great journey as far the road will take us.
You taped this on the day my husband died. We will get through this.
So sorry for the loss of your husband. Prayers of comfort for you!
I’m sorry for your loss Kathy.
Prayers for you Kathy. ❤
Sorry for your terrible loss.
I can hear Sean saying “So proud of my baby girl” as he would call Stef. ❤️
Stef, if we could give you anything we would give you peace. I want you to know that at that moment when you were at the World of Disney store and you heard that song, Sean was with you at that exact moment. That was his way of showing you that he was there. Look for the signs. He will leave them all around. Thank you for continuing your journey throughout this most difficult time in your life. You are loved by all. Stay strong warrior! 😘
Remember, Sean wants you to be happy. Of course you are sad!!! You lost your best friend and greatest love. He cared so much for you and with that deep caring, he does not want you to be exhausted and in so much pain. It's good to not isolate yourself, to spend time with friends. Maybe a pastor or a grief counselor can help you, or maybe it just takes time to get beyond the deepest agony. Prayers for you, Stef. Take good care of you!
I cried with you, but then I smiled thinking of how Sean would like you to be. The Lord will give you the strength, just hang in there. Little by little, it can’t be done overnight. One day you’ll smile thinking of him. It is all a matter of time, love and prayers go out to you!
I am so sorry you are on this journey. This is not the club any wife wants to be part of. The one thing I had to teach myself that it is okay to be sad and cry. We do not have to be strong all the time. Life is so different now for you and all the firsts are difficult. I remember people telling me time heals. I have learned that is not true. Time helps us adjust to the life we now lead on our own. My husband has been gone 7 years and I am still sad and miss him dearly. I am starting to teach myself to do things we ways did together. Vacations were so important to him. I have planned and cancelled cruises because I was not ready. I now have a med cruise booked for next summer. First time I have looked forward to it. I know he is always with me and that is what keeps me going.
Stay strong and remember one day at a time and baby steps. There is no rush for healing in the grief journey.
Stef, how incredibly proud Sean still is of you. From the beginning, y'all have invited us in to share the journey, whether it was the pure joy of ship snacks or the raw pain. Y'all's love still shines like a beacon.
Grief has no time table. You are loved.❤
You are in the thick of the hurt. All you can expect of yourself is take each day as it comes. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. My thoughts are with you everyday.
Sweet Stef, it's is going to be ok. Missing Sean will never go away but time will make it easier to continue to live your life. You will be happy again, you will live for Sean and you will have him with you forever. Talk to him, laugh out loud at things you know he would laugh at or say something about. You do this at your pace. We love you and are here for you....hugssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Praying for u🧡❤️🧡
Hi honey. I’m so sorry. I’m here at work seven in the morning and I’m crying like a baby so I have to turn this off and finish it when I get home. just know there are so many strangers like me thinking about you often and wishing you peace and healing.Don’t give up. Your kitties need you.
My grandmother use to refer to the warm of love as a form of sunlight. After my grandfather past away she use to always remind me that even in the dark, the sun finds a way of shining through to reminds us that we are always surrounded by the sun ( love). May you always see the moon even when the dark feels like it’s lost it’s light.
Sean proud of you? Of course. We are SO proud of you Stef. You have never meant us....maybe never will but (I know this is going to come across as selfish) this is the BEST CZcams channel by far! Honestly. You are AMAZING Stef, nothing but love! Stay strong! You are strong 💪🏽!
I think you’re amazing and your strength shows. I know you don’t feel strong but believe me your strength shows and I am in awe of you sharing this journey, these love letters with us. One day at a time, one step at a time in your own way and when you need it our strength is yours to keep you standing.
Stef...you don’t know me personally but I wanted you to know I’ve been watching the videos for awhile now. My husband and I came across your videos over a year ago. We stumbled up on you and Sean’s videos because we love to cruise and we always enjoyed watching you guys cruise adventures. I’m sorry for your loss and I can’t imagine what you must be going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you. You are such a delight to watch and I love your genuine spirit. I wish I could hug you but here is my virtual hug ( ). I will continue to keep watchIng just take things one day at a time. Your vlog friend, Viv
So much hugs to you Stef. You are awesome. Continued prayers
you are not walking in anywhere alone. Sean is with you.
I found your channel by accident! I am ready to see the world and not be such a hermit, myself. I am a cancer survivor- 14 years in August. I saw your latest video on cruising with NCL! 24 years ago I took my virgin cruise on the Carnival Imagination. I can’t wait to start cruising again! I know I’m looking at past videos! Thanks for being so open about your experience. Grief goes in stages… and they’re not always in that order. Thanks for sharing your life beyond Sean.❤
Wishing you some peace for restful nights. We will share in prayers for Sean ❤️
Another day, another week, one step at a time. Just remember, you’re never alone. You got this entire community with you and you have Sean every step of the way.
Stef,
I understand some of the things you spoke of. Still trying to figure out my purpose, nearly 3yrs after my son passed.
To say that it is hard to continue is saying nothing. I am STILL here. So many long, hard, difficult days and nights. The pain and the longing and the void left behind is still there, but, as time passes you sort of transition. You learn to cope or deal with it a bit better. For me it was one second. At. A. Time. At this time, for me, it is one day at a time.
With a good circle of support and grief counseling, I have been able to continue to press forward. I understand, there are so many things my son and I did together and things that he listened to that I still can't revisit. Not yet, but in time.
Give yourself the time and the space to breathe and grieve. It is natural. You love him, Sean's presence is missed and the love is real. It continues. There is no doubt.
Sending hugs and prayers and such positive thoughts. Relish the memories. So awesome that you got to experience so much together and that it was chronicled.
🙏🏼 🙏🏼🙏🏼
*STAY STRONG STEF...YOU ARE NOT ALONE...WE ARE ALL WITH YOU INCLUDING SEAN...EVERY MINUTE OF THE DAY...*
My heart breaks for you. There are no words that anyone can say that can ease the pain. I lost my step daughter in September due to Cerebral Palsy complications. I know it's a different situation. Just know the Sean will always be with you. Just take it one day at a time. Everyone grieves differently, so we are here to listen.
So sorry for the loss of your step-daughter. Prayers sent up.
@@susanwillett8587 thank you
Just found your channel. My heart aches for you. Sending love and strength from England xxx ❤
what a sweet gesture with making the crane and a message for yourself. Take care Steph...love you!... ;)
Steph, you and Sean have touched me in ways I didn’t think possible! I’m rather new here and have caught up on all on your channel! I must share this please don’t let it upset you. March 6 is our anniversary, we’ve been married for 40 years. We were on our way to celebrate the night when I learned Of Sean’s passing. I couldn’t stop crying my husband was worried what was wrong. The true beauty in this is the way you both touched my heart and soul! You’re story is very powerful and very therapeutic. You both should be so proud of this accomplishment. I truly think you are helping so many with whatever grief they are dealing with. The love you both shared is rare in this world! Many never experience this. My Anniversary will forever be remembrance of Sean and your incredible love story. Love Tami ❤️🤲🏻
Oh Stef my heart breaks for you. Keep strong and like you said baby steps ❤❤❤
Stef, you are so brave sharing your grieving process publicly. You’re helping others become aware of the grief journey. When my husband died 2 1/2 years ago, I was on my own struggling with the agony. There was no Stef to guide me. Thank you for helping others. For me, my husband communicates in so many large and small ways. I need to be open to receiving and as time flows on, I’ve become a better listener more trusting with the unexplainable. You’ll be amazed by the creative ways he reaches out to you. Trust him and yourself.
You are an incredible person, I admire you for continuing to share your story. I am certain Sean is by your side and smiling with pride. Stay strong ... you’ve got this!
You are an amazing person - Stef.
We are NOT SEAN, but we are with you Stef, your never alone. Love u
Stefanie you remain in my thoughts and prayers. I cannot imagine what this must be like. My husband currently is battling stage 4 prostate cancer and our journey has been a long one. First diagnosed back in 2009 so I do get it. It is hard but I try to find strength that he is still here and is for most part happy and doing well on the investigative medication. Hang in there and stay strong and know it is perfectly fine to let your emotions out it is cleansing for the soul. You are so much stronger than you realize and one day hopefully you will be able to smile and find joy.
You are stronger than you think.
Hugs xx
It is a journey.... No right or wrong. Moment's will come and go. You will find over time, life will get easier for you. There is no time frame. Sending HUGS to you.
I am so sorry for your loss. I was one of your earliest subscribers years ago when you only had a few hundred subscribers. I cannot believe the journey you have went through and the journey you have taken us all on. I love your videos and how they end when you come home to the kitties. Sean will always be with you and be with all of us on the countless videos that live forever.
One day at a time, Stef! Do like I do....Sean is ALWAYS with you just like my husband is! You’re not in this alone! 💞
Sending you prayers and love.
Love you Stef and these videos! ❤️🙏
You will NEVER lose your connection to Sean! Keep pushing forward as he cheers you on proudly! 💗
Oh Hun I’m So Sorry!! Just know Sean is With You All The Time.. I pray The Lord just Comfort you and gives you peace.. Sending Love and Hugs!! ❤️🙏
Good for you getting out! You need to keep doing that and Sean would want you to.
My heart goes out to you Sweetie. Loss is unexplainable. I lost my husband and best friend after being together 52 years. 18 months ago but it still difficult. Continued prayers for your healing! Hugs and kisses!@
Hey Stef, I lost my husband 8 years ago, and today is my anniversary. I would have been married for 40 years. I went on utube because I am obsessively watching cruise videos, as my friends and I are planning a trip to France next year. And there you were. I don’t wish to lecture or tell you what to do or what not to do. It is definitely an individual journey. What I won’t do is tell you to be strong. Your grief is so new, I think its important to grieve, let go, cry, laugh, sleep, eat, etc. Just get through the day, one hour, one day at a time. I do think friend support is all important and so is work. Glad to see you have both. You are awesome. Be proud girl. You got this… 💪🏻
We love you Stef! ❤️❤️
It's so wonderful to have that much love with someone that it affects you so deeply.
Personally I heard Sean's voice throughout this whole vlog. Love ya Stef!
I did too! He is everywhere with her in this video. ❤️
Praying for strength it’s very hard losing a love one but God will surely see you through🙏🏾🥰
Continued prayers for you!
I can hear Sean say, "I’m proud of you, Stef!" Thank you for sharing your journey. I can’t imagine how hard this is but you are doing a great job! 🙏🏻✝️
GOD BLESS YOU!!
Oh Stefanie, I feel you're pain and sadness I am genuinely crying with you because of your loss of Sean. I genuinely wish there was something I can do to help make this easier for you. Thank you for sharing your videos with us all. Sean would be really proud of you, his baby girl as he often used to say. 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 Little by little you will be able to find inner peace and contentment and remember the good times together with Sean. Smiling with you at the special memories of the incredible life you and Sean had together.
Sending you much love 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗 at this time. Take care ❤️
It was thanks to you and sean with your vlog that we were inspired to go on the carnival breeze in 2019 we live in Sardinia and when we heard of your loss(so sorry) myself and my wife and daughter lit candles and said a prayer for you.
Stay strong, thank you posting this. If you need anything, WE ARE HERE FOR YOU! #loveup
Sending love from Australia, give yourself the time to grieve it’s the worst pain anyone can go through but the sad days will eventually lessen and the happier days will become more. Time is what you need to heal and come to terms and find the “new normal”. Stay 💪 💐
My heart aches to see you in so much pain, but I know there will be better days ahead for you. I will continue to pray for you to have peace and comfort. 🙏❤
Love you, Stef... thanks for sharing your journey with us. You are very courageous to do these videos, and I’m hoping it helps some to be able to share the grief that you are experiencing. Sean is so proud of you! We all are. Even though it breaks my heart to see the pain you are going through, and I wish I were there to give you a hug, know that I am praying for you. 🙏❤️ you are not alone.
Sean was a smart man! He knew you would need something to give you purpose and keep you going. Grief is different for everyone. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Give yourself some slack! Take one moment at a time!
Continued prayers for you as you go through this difficult process of healing 🙏🏽
Steph, My thoughts are always with you throughout the difficult times. Sean is and would be so proud of your determination. Stay strong. Sending love ❤️
Praying for peace...
Stef stay strong. Baby steps will get you through it and the love for Sean. Take care of yourself because time is a great healer. Sean will always be by your side. He doesn't want you to suffer. Prayers and love to you.
Sending you prayers and hugs stef, just wanna hug her and cry with her. We are all here for u stef you are not alone , you will never be by yourself. We are here 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Stef you’re doing an AMAZING job!!! One day at a time Dear Heart. Serous and I are praying for your strength and courage!!! ❤️❤️
So beautiful Stef. We are honored that we were your first journey out and that we could walk into Disney Springs with you. Even if it did give you some nerves :) But the donuts and BBQ were so good!! We love so much to see you smile again, it was amazing to actually give you a hug again. Keep smiling, keep going and you know we are here for you any time, any day , any where. So much love to you, we are so happy to be in your world.
I just recently found your channel. My condolences and prayers. It is really brave of you to continue your vlog and share your grief and loss. I think you will help a lot of people. Sean knew you would need something to do, something important, something to focus on other than grief. A reason to get out of bed. I'm proud of you for honoring his wishes, and continuing this great work that you both created. My wife died years ago from complications of cancer, so I have an idea of what you are experiencing. Most people think grief is emotional pain. It is, but it is also physical pain. I lost 22 pounds the first week after my wife died. It was tough. Little by little, life improved. I really tried to focus on what I gained having been married to Shari, more than what I lost by her passing. Anyway, words don't help much at this point, but prayers do, and I know you have a lot of people praying for you, including me. Comfort, peace & strength.
Stef, grief as you are realizing has no specific road map. It is truly your own personal journey and you are embracing it beautifully. I am touched you are sharing this with the world. Through your tears and pain will come small moments of joy that will increase over time. There is a major piece of your life that is missing because Sean is not physically at your side. In time, it will fill with his spiritual presence that will grow stronger. I lost my 26 year old son 3 years ago. This has been my experience. Sending love and support to you from Maine.❤
We love you too!❤️
Celebrate small victories. You're doing everything right. Just keep going. Much love, Braveheart.
Praying for you & peace
I am really sorry for your loss. It seems so wrong for young people to die. Prayers for you.
God bless you Stef♥️
Keep talking Stef x
many hugs, i have been there
Stay strong Stef,you will get stronger,there is no time limit to grief,but Sean is definitely there with you,holding your hand,he was your rock in life and he will continue to be,thanks for continuing to do your vlogs,you are an inspiration,bless you 💖💖
I am so proud of you. Just take those baby steps.. You will never get over the pain of losing your soul mate, but the crying will ease with time. I know you feel lonely and empty right now. The places and things you all did was so special. Just remember you are loved by so many people. Talk to Sean & just know he is there with you always. He was so brave and gave it all he could. He is not in all that pain now. He will always be in your heart. We love you Stef!
Prayers and hugs, 🙏🙏🙏
Your strength is amazing. Sean would be beyond proud of you. You made it another week and you should be very proud of yourself. 💜 Sending all my love from 🇨🇦
Prayers for you🙏🏻
Sending you prayers 🙏❤ he with you
I can't even imagine what you're going through Stef, but a routine is the best thing to help you through this. Everyone has to grieve when they lose someone. Much love. xx
Oh Stef, I found myself, as I watched this, going back to that same dark place I once was too. I could feel those indescribable feelings. It is as if something has sucked all the air out of my body, its the heaviness of grief. Please know that you WILL get through this. No one can tell you HOW, that is something you just have to figure out what works for you. I wrote in a journal every day when my husband passed, as you do with these videos, its good to get it out. Do what you have to do, for you and no one else. This is your journey, and even though you have to do this by yourself, you are never ever alone. Always be open to Sean's presence. We all love you Stef
Sorry for your loss!
Thank you sharing Stef. We love you.
Just keep getting up kiddo! You are amazing ❤
Your such a strong human. Praying for you 🙏🏼
Watching this made us cry with you but it was very up lifting that you keep Sean’s memories alive with continuing your Vlogs and his story!
You both are in our thoughts and prayers ❤️❤️
Sean wants you to be happy. don't dwell on the bad times reflect on the good times you had with him. You can do this Stef you are strong and Sean is always with you. we love you and we're here for you
Sending you love, hugs and prayers ❤
So very sorry for your loss. Sending Prayers and good vibes your way.
Continued love and prayers. 🙏💖
Kisses and Hugs for you Stef!
You are such a inspiration. Keep pushing forward!! I hope you are having a great day. God love you and will continue giving you the strength and peace you need.
😘😘
Oh Stef I do feel for you....
Thank you so much for sharing everything,very brave of you....
Little goals like staying up and watching tv is awesome.....well done...
The Vegas blog is awesome......
So well done for meeting your friends and doing something Disney related....
Wishing you much peace and love...xx
I wish you have peace ❤
Sorry for your loss🙏🏼
Thank you for sharing your difficult journey. You are strong! Sending you lots of peace.
Just know that I’m sending you lots of love, hugs and prayers!!
Hang in there Stef. You've got this.❤
Sending lots of love your way. I pray as the days go on, you have more smiles than crys thinking of all the wonderful memories you and Sean created🤗
These vlogs are very helpful. I totally understand what you are going through.
Hoping you can catch a nap- I don’t like clock watching either!
Stef, please know you are loved. Prayers continue for you that God provides you comfort and relief of pain. The loss of your best friend and life partner is unbelievably sad. God bless you.
It is really really good for you to keep vlogging. Both for you and for Sean. If anyone can figure out how to be with you every step of the way, it's Sean!